~*Chapter 29 *~
Max softly ran his fingers over the curve of Liz’s hip as she cradled against his side. He lied on his back, his right arm tucked under his head as he stared at the ceiling. He could feel her soft breath caressing his chest and he looked down to look at her once again. He found it was the only way to assure himself she was really there, so he constantly kept vigil over her sleep. He should have been the one to give into slumber. Max had not had restful sleep for several days but he still could not rest. What happened between him and Liz had opened up a can of unanswered questions. He wasn’t sure he could rest until he had some answers.
Emily was on his mind as well. Liz told him he had to have faith that everything was going to work out, but losing control of over the life of your child was not easy to accept. He had thought that he would bring her the health she needed, saving her life in the process. That was now just wishful thinking. She had just walked into his life, the thought of losing her sent a shudder down his body that caused Liz to stir. He shut his eyes tightly forcing the thoughts out of his mind. Liz had been dealing with this for much longer than he had, he needed her guidance, needed to follow her lead. She was not just a parent but also a doctor. She had assured him the fight was not over and he would not let them down. It wasn’t easy not giving into self-pity.
Max looked down at Liz once again and found her dark eyes staring back at him. The look she gave him told him, she knew what he had been thinking. Told him that he was completely transparent. It also filled him with strength, filled him with renewed hope. He tightened his hold on her and kissed her forehead. She was what he needed.
“Have you been awake for very long?” Liz asked, cuddling tighter in to his body.
Max nodded, bringing his other arm around to pull her on to his chest.
Her body complacently accepted this new position. She felt his hard muscles against her soft skin and sighed in contentment.
“I had a lot to think about” Max finally said.
Liz kissed the hollow of his neck, before meeting his eyes. “Penny for your thoughts.”
“They are worth more than a penny, I assure you.” He replied with a smile.
“Tell me.” She insisted crawling up his body until she was face to face with Max. She supported her weight on her elbows, which she rested on either side of his shoulders and pushed his hair out of his face before kissing his forehead and then his lips.
Max wrapped his arms around her body and squeezed her against him. He then let his hands caress the soft skin of her back. He looked at Liz, unsure of himself. He didn’t want her running away from him, but she had always seemed hesitant about their relationship. She had told him that she loved him. Accepted his declaration as well, but had it been in the heat of the moment? He didn’t want her to have the same doubts and so he reaffirmed his words “I love you, Liz Parker.”
Liz smiled at him and then tenderly kissed him. “I love you, too. Max Evans.”
Max raised his hands and holding the back of her head, he kissed her. The kiss was strong and full of passion. He swiftly rolled over and pinned Liz under him, before breaking the kiss.
Liz stared at him, searching his expression. He was silently straightening the tangled tendrils of loose hair that surrounded her face. He avoided her eyes. He seemed to be preparing himself for something. “What is it, Max?”
He stopped fidgeting, took a deep breath and looked at her. “I don’t want to hide us anymore.”
It took a few seconds for his words to make sense. It was not something that Liz had been thinking about, but obviously, it was bothering Max.
Before she could say anything, he continued. “I tried to understand your original hesitation when we started this relationship but I need you to understand that after last night, I can’t keep us hidden anymore. I love you Liz. I’m not going anywhere and if you decide you have to go… I’m going with you. I’m not going to lose you again. I would prefer for you and Emily to stay here, amongst family and friends but if you can’t… I’m not staying behind. I lost you once because I was stupid enough to keep quiet and I’m not making that mistake again. You and Emily are the most important people in my life and if I have to sweep streets to be close to you, I will. I’ll give it all up to be with you. Since I know how I feel, I can’t see any reason why we have to keep Emily in the dark about us. Unless… you…”
Liz was shocked. Stupefied in to silence over Max’s declaration but also by the desperate look in his eyes. He was frightened of her response but he was also desperate for her to agree. What a way to wake up…
She had no doubts of her feelings for Max and by what he just said, his feelings where just as strong for her. There was no reason to keep this quiet, was there? Now it was her turn to look scared. Liz knew that she wanted to be with Max but there were so many details… It was not just something they could just jump into, although she had done just that earlier in the evening.
Liz wiggled out from under Max, pushing him off of her as the thoughts ran around her head. Max rolled off of her giving her the space she needed. He had no intentions of forcing her to respond favorably to his words. She sat on the bed and realized that she didn’t have cloths on. This was a serious conversation and their nakedness seemed inappropriate. Grabbing the sheet under her, she pulled it and wrapped it around her body. She then turned to face Max to discuss their future when she noticed that she had pulled away the sheet that covered him and now he was the one exposed. Liz quickly looked around and found the bed’s coverlet. She pulled it up to Max’s hips, covering him from her view. He was a distracting sight and she needed to focus.
Liz now looked at Max who was patiently waiting for her to get herself together. “I think… I think you are right.” She finally said.
Max let out a sigh in relief.
“But…” Liz continued, “I think we need to talk about this.”
Max nodded vigorously. He was so happy she had accepted his declaration; he didn’t care about the details. Actually, he thought, those were already working themselves out.
“I love you Max, with all my heart and I think that Emily should know about our relationship but…” Liz started “I think that we shouldn’t make any firm plans about who is following who.”
Max sat up quickly, the coverlet falling precarilously low. He wasn’t going to let this conversation go down the wrong path. He was going to be as upfront as possible. He didn’t want to scare her off but, he thought he should lay out all his cards and hope for the best.
“I want you to move in with me.” Max blurted out.
Liz, once again was stupefied into silence. Her mouth fell open and she stared at Max. He was moving VERY fast.
“I’ve thought about this, Liz. I have plenty a room”
“Max, it’s not that easy. There are others to think about. I don’t live alone, Max. I have a commitment with them. Emily is used to a way of life. I can’t just up and move in here with you.” Liz sputtered, obviously nervous.
“No, you don’t understand” Max said moving off the bed. He grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the door, unaware of his unclothed state. “I wasn’t talking about just you. I thought you would say something like that, and I don’t want to disrupt Emily’s environment.”
Liz grabbed tightly the blanket that she wore. Tugging on Max’s hand, she stopped his words momentarily. “Could you put something on, so we can talk about this.”
Max let go of her hand and snapped his sweatpants from the floor but he continued talking as he pulled them on. “I told you I bought a big house but I don’t think you have an idea of how big.”
Was he insane? Liz thought as he pulled her through the hallway towards the stairs of the house. “Max…”
“Liz, Maria insisted I find a place so they could crash if they wanted and so I did.”
They had reached the second floor before Max let go of Liz’s hand to open the several doors that were there.
“The house has four rooms – three up here and then mine downstairs; but that’s not all” he insisted grabbing Liz’s hand once again, dragging her to the last room in the hall. “This room is not even finished”
Liz walked in as Max opened the door to reveal a huge room. It appeared to be finished except for a stripped section on the sidewall.
“It was suppose to be a separate apartment from the house. It covers the length of the garage” Max said extending his arm in a sweeping manner across the room. “I opened the wall and added a door to connect it to the house so it could be converted into a sort of playroom for Sammy. I called a contractor and it would cost pennies to finish the room to stand independent from the house. We can add a data port, so Alex doesn’t have to drive anywhere to send his work to Boston. The guy assured me he could finish the job in two weeks tops! We just need to add a door here and stairs on the outside” Max rambled pointing to the stripped wall “It has a small bedroom but it will give him privacy and independence”
Grabbing her hand, Max pulled Liz back into the hallway and into the closest room. “Emily could have her own room but…” Taking Liz through the private bathroom, he entered the next room “still be close to Josh. Although…” He paused and looked at Liz before adding seriously “this would not be for too long because I’m not too comfortable with my daughter this close to a boy”
Liz took advantage of the pause and adjusting the blanket she had wrapped around her body she started “Max..”
Max grabbed her hand again, pulling her out of the room, into the hallway and into the last room on the floor “Serena can also have a room. Everyone fits! I never thought I would thank Maria for making me buy this huge house but God Bless her!”
Liz cleared her throat and raising her brows at Max asked “And where would I sleep?
Max sauntered over to Liz and pulling her into his arms, soundly kissed her. “WHEN we sleep, you could sleep with me.”
Liz smiled, Max definitely had been thinking about this. She extricated herself from his embrace and walking out into the hallway, silently peered into the rooms again. Max leaned against the doorframe and let her take it all in. When Liz reached the end of the hall she turned to look at Max.
“I can’t make a decision like this on my own. I need to discuss this with them.
“Of course” Max said hopefully.
“Besides that, Max…” Liz started “Don’t you think this is… too soon?
Max pushed himself off the door and moved to stand in front of her. “Why do we have to wait?”
Liz put a hand on his chest “Why rush?”
“I don’t want to spend more time than I have to away from you and Emily. I have always told you I want to be part of your lives. I want to come home and find the people I love here. I want to tuck my child into her bed, bump into you when I get out of the shower, triple the time it takes me to do the laundry, fight over the remote control, hear about your day over the dinner table. I want to know what are her favorite shoes and if you like your toast with jam or butter. I can’t learn these things just by visiting you. These are the things you learn when you live with someone. That’s what I want. I want to be a real father. I want us to be a real family.”
Liz was speechless. She could see the eagerness in his eyes. She could tell that this meant a lot to Max. It was as if he had been waiting forever for this moment. She felt a tightness in her chest. Even though she knew he loved her and she was willing to give him a lifetime of memories, she realized that he was willing to do the same for her. He was talking about forever. It was a realization that made her lightheaded.
“Can I think about it?” Liz finally asked. Everything was moving so fast. She felt the need to slow things down. There were so many things to think about. The house in Boston, Serena and Josh, Alex. The future had always included them. She never thought that she would be able to have the love of her life. She never thought Max would want to be with her. Alex and Serena never had serious relationships so the thought of breaking the living arrangements was never discussed. It was as if they planned to live the rest of their lives together. Their own unconventional family. For some reason, as she explored her feelings for Max, she still didn’t see the future turning into this. She had been blindsided in a way. It was so obvious now. Why was she with Max if they were not looking into a future together? That was the way relationships worked. You got to know each other and then, if all worked out, you spent your lives together. It was logical, and yet…
Max was not fooled by her response. He knew Liz would find any cracks in the plans he had laid out. He didn’t want to pressure her into making the choice he wanted but he was not willing to stand by and let her put up road blocks that didn’t make sense.
“Think about it. But…” He interjected “don’t think negative thoughts. Think of the reasons why you should agree and not why you shouldn’t. Focus on the positive.” He walked up to her and pulled her into his arms, nestling her head under his chin. “We will always have problems but if we are together, we can work through them. You told me we had to share our load. That means we work together to solve the problems that come up. Also, you only are to think about the change in residence. I still want to tell Emily about us, regardless of what is decided about the house.”
“Okay. We tell Emily about us and I will think about the housing issue.”
Max kissed Liz softly “Thank you.”
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Emily looked at the clock on her beside. 12:45 am. She turned onto her stomach and crunched the pillow into a ball, pulling it under her chin.
“Go to sleep!” She heard Josh tell her from the top bunk.
“She’s not back yet.” Emily sighed
“She’ll be back soon.” Josh reassured.
“Do you think he doesn’t want to be my father anymore? Do you think that’s why he didn’t come?”
“I’m tired Em, and this is dumb. He just didn’t come once…”
“Twice! Yesterday and today.” Emily corrected.
“Big deal! Twice. He doesn’t have to come everyday. Many kids see their dad once a month. Others once a year. Uncle Max forgets to drop by and all of a sudden he doesn’t want to be your dad? Get over yourself”
Emily buried her head in her pillow. Josh had been telling her the same thing all afternoon. Turning, she looked at the clock again. 12:47. “Where do you think she went?”
“Uncle Lala said she went on an errand.”
“It’s been a long time.”
Josh peaked over the railing and looked down at Emily. “You know where she went.”
Emily turned over and looked up at Josh. “Do you think they got into a fight? Moms and Dads fight all the time.”
Josh smirked “Uncle Max and Aunt Liz still have the little angels with arrows flying around them. It’s too soon for them to fight. Anyway, what are they going to fight about?”
“Me.”
“Oye, Baka! I have no idea why I put up with you.” Josh let out exasperated
Emily pushed at the springs of the top bunk with her foot, barely moving the mattress. “It’s possible! You know everyone has gotten tested. If there were a match Mom would have told me. Why invest time in me if I’m not going to be around?”
Josh gasp at the words he was hearing. He could feel his temper rising and before he knew what he was doing he jumped off the bunk. As he landed he felt a stinging sensation run up his leg, forcing him to grab onto the frame of the bed to regain his balance. He turned and looked at Emily’s startled face. Before she could mutter a word he bent down and grabbed her forcefully by the shoulders, shaking her. “You stop saying that! I’m tired of listening to that! You better not die on me, Emily Marie because if you do…” Josh shut his eyes at just the thought “I’ll hate you, Forever!”
Josh let go of Emily and turned away from her. He cradled his head in his hands and breathed in slow, controlled breaths in hopes to temper his anger.
“Gomen.” Emily whispered
“Sorry is not going to cut it.” Josh replied. “I don’t understand, Em. What happened to ‘we’re going to beat this’? What happened to our theme song?” He asked referring to Pink’s 18 wheeler song which had become an anthem to them. “Why do you keep doing this?”
Emily moved over to sit on the edge of the bed next to her friend. She rested her small head against his shoulder. “I don’t want to go.” She finally said swiping the errant tears that escaped her eyes. “But… we need to be prepared. I don’t want Mommy to be alone. I don’t want anyone to be alone.”
The small child was not oblivious to her condition. She knew what her chances were. She didn’t want to die, but hope was fleeting and, in her mind, she had to put things in order before time ran out. It was, as if having a purpose gave her the right to ask for more time.
“What about me?” Emily heard Josh whisper, barely a sigh in the night.
Emily scooted in a bit closer and sneaked her arm under his, holding him to her. “You don’t need anyone. You’re the strongest guy in the world. Anyway, you’ll be off to Jr. High School and you’d be leaving me behind anyway.” She announced and then added as an afterthought “ You better not start hanging around Chester Simons and his group, they’re all game heads and will suck your brains, the little you have, out of your nose. So you can’t hang around them when you get to Jr. High. And you better not start drooling over the cheerleaders. Boys seem to develop some type of disease as soon as they get into that school; they start looking at the girls all funny and drooling over the cheerleaders. Just because they jump up and down with those little skirts. You better not turn into one of those.”
Josh turn his head away from Emily and swiftly wiped at his eyes. He then forced a smile and looked back at her. “Chester is not such a bad guy and the cheerleaders… well… I won’t drool.” He watched his small friend beam a smile at him. He took a lot of heat from his friends over Emily. They just didn’t understand how an 11-year-old boy could be friends with a 9-year-old girl. They had not been there with him during the darkest days of his life. But she had. She had seen him whole. She didn’t really understand it all. She was only 5 at the time, but she had not backed away from him during his worse times. With the innocence of her years she stood beside him, never looked at him differently or treated him with pity. After his mother, Emily was the most important person in his life and, even though he would never admit it out loud, he was scared for her.
The silence was broken by the sound of the door downstairs opening. Emily gripped Josh’s arm tightly and with suspended breath listened for any sound. She heard two people talking and when she identified the adults as Max and Liz, she quickly started slapping Josh’s arm in glee. She then pushed him off her bed and scrambled under her covers. “Get up there, before she comes in to check on us!”
Josh shook his head and grinned. Hopping up onto his bunk he laid back and continued listening to the voices downstairs. A few moments had past before he heard Emily call him. “What?” He replied gruffly as if she had interrupted his sleep.
“Thanks” He heard her say.
He smiled before responding “Whatever!”
TBC...
Secrets in the Dark(AU,M/L,ADULT) Ch 33 - AN 08/31/04 [WIP]
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starlady
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 61
- Joined: Mon Jan 07, 2002 4:59 am
- Location: New Hampshire, USA
~* Chapter 30 *~
His lips burned a trail on her skin. It was a fire that consumed them and at the same time gave them life. It seemed as if his hands were everywhere and yet she needed more.
“Please” was the plea that escaped her lips.
He knew what she wanted before she did and swiftly lifted her onto the table that rested against the back wall. “Do you think we should be doing this?” He asked, but didn’t wait for an answer before he crushed his mouth against hers.
His hands frantically worked to undo the small buttons of her blouse, while she buried her fingers in his short hair, keeping him from abandoning her lips. His tongue dipped and caressed as he slanted his mouth over hers again and again. When air became a vital necessity, her mouth released his and she gasped when, a few seconds later, felt his hot mouth cover the flesh of her breast, suckling one as he massaged the other. Her hands pressed his head closer to her, trying to sooth the ache his actions created.
“You’re so beautiful” He said as he moved his mouth to cover the other mound of flesh in front of him. “I can never get enough of you”
His hand moved over her taut stomach and undoing the first button of her jeans, he eased further down until his fingers tangled in damp curls.
“GET OUT OF THERE YOU TWO!” Said the booming voice that accompanied the loud banging on the door. “Don’t you think you’re too old to be playing these games?”
Liz tried to get her breathing under control but even the loud interruption was not enough to extinguish the fire Max had ignited in her. She trembled in frustration before she looked up at Max. His eyes were glazed over and she could see he was suffering from her same malady.
“Do you think we should kill her now or maybe wait until after she has the baby?” He asked.
She chuckled and pulled his face close to give him a kiss. “I guess we’ll have to pick up where we left off later”
The door rattled again “COME ON GUYS, PEOPLE ARE STARTING TO ARRIVE!”
“I waited so many years to get you in here and when it finally happens… we get interrupted.” Max complained as he helped Liz button her blouse.
“You know that if we had tried this when we were in high school it would have ended the same way. Maria was never far behind and her timing was always impeccable.” Liz hopped of the table, using Max to steady herself on her wobbly legs as she smoothed her cloths. She then turned and did the same for Max. “I think we look presentable. Don’t you?”
Pulling her against him, so she could feel his hard body still yearning for her, Max said, “It all depends on what passes as presentable these days, you look thoroughly kissed and disheveled. And as you can see, I’m feeling HARD pressed to finish what I started and be damned with our so-called friend”
“IF YOU TWO DON”T GET OUT OF THERE RIGHT NOW, I’M GETTING REINFORCEMENTS… AND YOU KNOW WHO I’M TALKING ABOUT” Maria shouted, banging at the door again.
Max gave Liz a hard kiss, and pushing away, he sighed. “When are we going to have some uninterrupted time together?”
Liz smiled at his pout “We’ll be moving in together in two weeks. That is not too long.”
“It feels like an eternity” He replied as he unlocked the door.
The bright sunlight that filtered from the school hallway momentarily blinded them and when vision returned they were facing a hurricane called Maria. “How could you? There are a ton of things to do downstairs and you two are making out in the Eraser room? I could have believed it from Kyle but not from you, Max Evans.”
Liz had the decency to look chagrined. She didn’t know what had come over her, although it was still early, the doors to the gymnasium had been opened and the blood drive was well on its way. It seemed that whenever Max put his hands on her she lost all sense of propriety and reason.
Grabbing Liz’s hand, Max pulled her down the hall as he gave Maria a scathing look “We were taking a break.” He said and then paused; whirled around and coming up to Maria’s ear he said, “I’m not going to forget this.” He then turned and continued toward the gym.
Maria stood still a few seconds with her mouth open. Was this the docile Max Evans she had been friends with for most of her life? Her Max would never growl at her, he was usually meek and accepting. She picked up her pace and quickly caught up to the couple as they entered the gymnasium.
The bleachers on the left of the court were pulled out to accommodate those waiting for their turn, while a makeshift daycare was situated in front of a stage that had been assembled for entertainment.
Max squeezed Liz’s hand and quickly kissed her before heading to the main entrance where a registration table had been assembled. Alex sat at the back of the table where he had setup his computer. Max noticed his father standing behind him talking animatedly with a man Max didn’t recognize.
“The young man is quite talented. He showed me the program he wrote to keep the registrants organized last night and I knew you just had to meet him.” Phillip said to Mr. Travis Campbell. Mr. Campbell was one of Phillips corporate clients. He was one of the biggest clients that Phillip’s firm represented.
Alex looked over his shoulder at the two men peering at his screen. “It’s not a big deal, sir. I just made a GUI interface that populates a relational database. I also made sure that the data could be easily uploaded to the hospital so that they don’t have to go through the same data again. Since I haven’t had much luck at finding a T1 line I tried to make the packets that the program transfers small in size. This accommodates our needs and also takes into account the equipment limitations.”
Campbell nodded in complete understanding. “How long did it take to write?”
“Oh, I actually got it going in about 3 hours. I already had many of the modules written. I like writing in object oriented modules because of the ease of reusability. It was almost like plug and play.” Alex replied modestly.
“I’m telling you Travis. He’s a genius!” Phillip boasted.
“I must say I’m impressed. Phillip has told me you have been telecommuting the last two months out of Roswell.”
“It hasn’t been easy, the line I have at our rental is very slow but I’ll be moving in with Max in a few weeks and he has setup an impressive data line that rivals the one we have in the offices up at Las Cruces. It’s going to make life a lot easier.”
“So you’re close friends with Max?”
“Oh, yeah. We’ve been friends since high school. Then I moved up to Boston and met Liz and Emily. We’ve been roommates since before Emily was born. I actually was in the delivery room when Emily arrived. Now we’ve been thrown back together and well… doing what we can to make sure the little bugger has a future.”
“I’d love to see some of the other stuff you have written. Maybe you should drop by my office so we can talk.”
Alex was taken aback by the offer. He didn’t know what to say. “Um, thanks? I guess. I should tell you I’m not looking for a job. I have one.”
Campbell smiled and patted him on the shoulder “No ones looking for a job until the right offer comes around. Don’t worry Mr. Whitman, no commitments, just two techies coming together to chat.”
Alex relaxed. It wasn’t as if Alex had not thought of staying in Roswell. With Liz agreeing to move in with Max, it was almost assured that Emily and her would be settling down in Roswell. Things were going to be so different with out Liz in the house; it was all he could do not to think about his future. So he didn’t. He avoided the future like a plague. Unfortunately the future was creeping up on him at an alarming rate. His office had called the week before to tell him that they could only allow him to continue to telecommute until the end of August. That was just 5 to 6 weeks away.
Alex smiled at Campbell and shook his hand. “I’d love to get together.”
At that moment Isabel walked behind the trio. She looked at Alex, curious about the exchange. Alex looked over Campbell’s shoulder and caught her eyes. He beamed a captivating smile her way and Isabel could feel her cheeks warming with the blush she knew colored her face. Quickly averting her eyes she continued walking towards Kyle and Serena.
Isabel had been spending a lot of time with Alex and had come to the realization that she was falling for the man. He was so sensitive and caring. He knew how to communicate with people and compromise. He was logical but so romantic at the same time. He was responsible and trustworthy. He was dependable and… He was so many things… Oh and how he kissed! She could feel her toes curl just thinking about it. He touched her with such reverence and such care. His lips were soft and hard at the same time. It took her breath away. It was difficult to admit the failure of her marriage but after spending time with Alex she realized that Jesse had not been the man for her. She had rushed into the marriage before she knew what she was looking for. She had let the social status of being a married woman rush her into something that was not right. Alex was right. She felt fluttery just thinking about him. It was not about flaunting a successful man from her arm. It was about throwing popcorn at each other from across the room while watching cartoons with subtitles. It was about working her cases in companionable silence while he cursed under his breath at the computer screen. It was about family and his commitment to the one Serena, Liz and he had created. It was about wanting to be part of that family and wanting to add to it.
Isabel was aware that Alex had not made that same commitment to her. She knew he never talked about their future, about them as a couple. She knew she was setting herself up for heartbreak but she was tired of holding back. She was tired of being cautious. If he just had a few months to give, she was going to take them and make enough memories to last a lifetime.
“Isabel, watch where you’re going!” Kyle said grabbing her arm and pulling her around the poles that had just been strung together to make a make shift corral.
“I’m so sorry!” Isabel stammered, embarrassed over her daydreaming.
“No harm.” Serena said before turning and grabbing one of the football players Kyle had recruited by the arm. “I need you over here.” She told the burly young man, pointing to the other side of the corral.
“I just wanted to make sure all was running smoothly over here. Do you need anything?” Isabel asked Kyle.
“No. We’re good. The superintendent of the school district was just here. He made sure that we knew that the school was at my disposal. It’s nice to know your charity work with the Teachers Association is paying off.”
“You obviously underestimate your own work, Kyle. If anything is given to us I assure you it has more to do with your volunteer work with the kids in this school than it has to do with my work with the teachers. I don’t think I’ve even met the superintendent personally. We have talked on the phone but never face to face. Credit where credit is due. It’s your work that opened the doors to this school.”
“Whatever.” Kyle said trying to brush off the compliment.
“I’m going to see if Jeff and Nancy need some help setting things up.” Isabel said as she walked away.
“You know she’s right” Kyle heard say from behind him.
“What?”
“You know what. You do wonderful work with these kids. They respect you and trust your leadership. I think that because of that, you have also gained the respect of the faculty at the school. They trust your judgment. This whole setup was because you threw in a good word.”
Kyle obstinately shook his head in denial. Serena grabbed his face in her hands to stop him from shaking it. “You’re a good man, Kyle. Stop denying it. The cat is out of the bag.”
Kyle grabbed Serena’s hands and pulled them away from his face. He was not much taller than her but still could boast at least 4 inches over her. “I never denied anything. You are the one that keeps shelving me in with the psychos of the world. And since you have admitted that I’m a ‘good man’, will you accept to go out on a formal date with me. Tonight, after this all wraps up?”
Serena had denied all Kyle’s requests for dates that did not involve the kids. She had quite a few reasons why she avoided getting involved with the man. Fear was on top of that list. Fear of getting emotionally involved. Fear of screwing things up and ruining a great friendship between Kyle and Josh. Fear of failing to keep his attention. She had dwelled upon each request and every time she denied herself. At this point she was getting quite feed up with the way he just did not want to get the message. She was also getting feed up with her own cowardice. It wasn’t as if they were staying local. They’d be out of Roswell before she could get involved. It wasn’t as if she couldn’t use a roll in the hay. It wasn’t as if she had not ogled at his perfectly fitting Jeans and drooled over the possibilities.
Serena licked her lips at the thought. Kyle groaned.
“Don’t take it out if your not going to use it.” He said. “Well? Are we on for tonight?”
Serena surveyed Kyle from the top of his hair to the tip of his sneakers. The perusal did not go unnoticed by Kyle who was still waiting for her answer, still holding her hands close to his chest, still hoping she say yes.
“No. Can’t do it.” Serena said flippantly as she pulled her hands out of his and turned to walk away.
Kyle let out a sigh of frustration. He wanted her so bad he ached. She was a beauty but she was also smart and funny and caring and everything he had been looking for. But she was also stubborn as a mule and she wouldn’t budge an inch. He even had thought of kidnapping her for a night on the town. Actually, it had been Josh that had suggested it. He said he was tired of having them staring at each other and that Kyle needed to take her out and get it over with.
Serena looked back at Kyle. He stood stock-still and she knew he was reigning in his temper. In some sick place in her mind she enjoyed his chase and would be sad to see it end. She then looked back at the stage were Josh sat over the edge. He looked at her and shook his head as if reprimanding her. She smiled at him and knew it was time to give in and see where things would go. She needed to trust herself and trust Kyle.
“I can’t do it tonight, but I’m free tomorrow.” She called back to Kyle.
Kyle’s head swung around to stare at her. Did he hear her right? “Tomorrow?”
Serena looked at him and grinned as she nodded. “What time?”
Josh jumped off the stage and walked past Kyle. As he looked up at his friend he saw the utter disbelief in his face and Josh rolled his eyes. ‘Adults.’ He thought ‘they can always make things so complicated’.
Cont. in Next Post.
His lips burned a trail on her skin. It was a fire that consumed them and at the same time gave them life. It seemed as if his hands were everywhere and yet she needed more.
“Please” was the plea that escaped her lips.
He knew what she wanted before she did and swiftly lifted her onto the table that rested against the back wall. “Do you think we should be doing this?” He asked, but didn’t wait for an answer before he crushed his mouth against hers.
His hands frantically worked to undo the small buttons of her blouse, while she buried her fingers in his short hair, keeping him from abandoning her lips. His tongue dipped and caressed as he slanted his mouth over hers again and again. When air became a vital necessity, her mouth released his and she gasped when, a few seconds later, felt his hot mouth cover the flesh of her breast, suckling one as he massaged the other. Her hands pressed his head closer to her, trying to sooth the ache his actions created.
“You’re so beautiful” He said as he moved his mouth to cover the other mound of flesh in front of him. “I can never get enough of you”
His hand moved over her taut stomach and undoing the first button of her jeans, he eased further down until his fingers tangled in damp curls.
“GET OUT OF THERE YOU TWO!” Said the booming voice that accompanied the loud banging on the door. “Don’t you think you’re too old to be playing these games?”
Liz tried to get her breathing under control but even the loud interruption was not enough to extinguish the fire Max had ignited in her. She trembled in frustration before she looked up at Max. His eyes were glazed over and she could see he was suffering from her same malady.
“Do you think we should kill her now or maybe wait until after she has the baby?” He asked.
She chuckled and pulled his face close to give him a kiss. “I guess we’ll have to pick up where we left off later”
The door rattled again “COME ON GUYS, PEOPLE ARE STARTING TO ARRIVE!”
“I waited so many years to get you in here and when it finally happens… we get interrupted.” Max complained as he helped Liz button her blouse.
“You know that if we had tried this when we were in high school it would have ended the same way. Maria was never far behind and her timing was always impeccable.” Liz hopped of the table, using Max to steady herself on her wobbly legs as she smoothed her cloths. She then turned and did the same for Max. “I think we look presentable. Don’t you?”
Pulling her against him, so she could feel his hard body still yearning for her, Max said, “It all depends on what passes as presentable these days, you look thoroughly kissed and disheveled. And as you can see, I’m feeling HARD pressed to finish what I started and be damned with our so-called friend”
“IF YOU TWO DON”T GET OUT OF THERE RIGHT NOW, I’M GETTING REINFORCEMENTS… AND YOU KNOW WHO I’M TALKING ABOUT” Maria shouted, banging at the door again.
Max gave Liz a hard kiss, and pushing away, he sighed. “When are we going to have some uninterrupted time together?”
Liz smiled at his pout “We’ll be moving in together in two weeks. That is not too long.”
“It feels like an eternity” He replied as he unlocked the door.
The bright sunlight that filtered from the school hallway momentarily blinded them and when vision returned they were facing a hurricane called Maria. “How could you? There are a ton of things to do downstairs and you two are making out in the Eraser room? I could have believed it from Kyle but not from you, Max Evans.”
Liz had the decency to look chagrined. She didn’t know what had come over her, although it was still early, the doors to the gymnasium had been opened and the blood drive was well on its way. It seemed that whenever Max put his hands on her she lost all sense of propriety and reason.
Grabbing Liz’s hand, Max pulled her down the hall as he gave Maria a scathing look “We were taking a break.” He said and then paused; whirled around and coming up to Maria’s ear he said, “I’m not going to forget this.” He then turned and continued toward the gym.
Maria stood still a few seconds with her mouth open. Was this the docile Max Evans she had been friends with for most of her life? Her Max would never growl at her, he was usually meek and accepting. She picked up her pace and quickly caught up to the couple as they entered the gymnasium.
The bleachers on the left of the court were pulled out to accommodate those waiting for their turn, while a makeshift daycare was situated in front of a stage that had been assembled for entertainment.
Max squeezed Liz’s hand and quickly kissed her before heading to the main entrance where a registration table had been assembled. Alex sat at the back of the table where he had setup his computer. Max noticed his father standing behind him talking animatedly with a man Max didn’t recognize.
“The young man is quite talented. He showed me the program he wrote to keep the registrants organized last night and I knew you just had to meet him.” Phillip said to Mr. Travis Campbell. Mr. Campbell was one of Phillips corporate clients. He was one of the biggest clients that Phillip’s firm represented.
Alex looked over his shoulder at the two men peering at his screen. “It’s not a big deal, sir. I just made a GUI interface that populates a relational database. I also made sure that the data could be easily uploaded to the hospital so that they don’t have to go through the same data again. Since I haven’t had much luck at finding a T1 line I tried to make the packets that the program transfers small in size. This accommodates our needs and also takes into account the equipment limitations.”
Campbell nodded in complete understanding. “How long did it take to write?”
“Oh, I actually got it going in about 3 hours. I already had many of the modules written. I like writing in object oriented modules because of the ease of reusability. It was almost like plug and play.” Alex replied modestly.
“I’m telling you Travis. He’s a genius!” Phillip boasted.
“I must say I’m impressed. Phillip has told me you have been telecommuting the last two months out of Roswell.”
“It hasn’t been easy, the line I have at our rental is very slow but I’ll be moving in with Max in a few weeks and he has setup an impressive data line that rivals the one we have in the offices up at Las Cruces. It’s going to make life a lot easier.”
“So you’re close friends with Max?”
“Oh, yeah. We’ve been friends since high school. Then I moved up to Boston and met Liz and Emily. We’ve been roommates since before Emily was born. I actually was in the delivery room when Emily arrived. Now we’ve been thrown back together and well… doing what we can to make sure the little bugger has a future.”
“I’d love to see some of the other stuff you have written. Maybe you should drop by my office so we can talk.”
Alex was taken aback by the offer. He didn’t know what to say. “Um, thanks? I guess. I should tell you I’m not looking for a job. I have one.”
Campbell smiled and patted him on the shoulder “No ones looking for a job until the right offer comes around. Don’t worry Mr. Whitman, no commitments, just two techies coming together to chat.”
Alex relaxed. It wasn’t as if Alex had not thought of staying in Roswell. With Liz agreeing to move in with Max, it was almost assured that Emily and her would be settling down in Roswell. Things were going to be so different with out Liz in the house; it was all he could do not to think about his future. So he didn’t. He avoided the future like a plague. Unfortunately the future was creeping up on him at an alarming rate. His office had called the week before to tell him that they could only allow him to continue to telecommute until the end of August. That was just 5 to 6 weeks away.
Alex smiled at Campbell and shook his hand. “I’d love to get together.”
At that moment Isabel walked behind the trio. She looked at Alex, curious about the exchange. Alex looked over Campbell’s shoulder and caught her eyes. He beamed a captivating smile her way and Isabel could feel her cheeks warming with the blush she knew colored her face. Quickly averting her eyes she continued walking towards Kyle and Serena.
Isabel had been spending a lot of time with Alex and had come to the realization that she was falling for the man. He was so sensitive and caring. He knew how to communicate with people and compromise. He was logical but so romantic at the same time. He was responsible and trustworthy. He was dependable and… He was so many things… Oh and how he kissed! She could feel her toes curl just thinking about it. He touched her with such reverence and such care. His lips were soft and hard at the same time. It took her breath away. It was difficult to admit the failure of her marriage but after spending time with Alex she realized that Jesse had not been the man for her. She had rushed into the marriage before she knew what she was looking for. She had let the social status of being a married woman rush her into something that was not right. Alex was right. She felt fluttery just thinking about him. It was not about flaunting a successful man from her arm. It was about throwing popcorn at each other from across the room while watching cartoons with subtitles. It was about working her cases in companionable silence while he cursed under his breath at the computer screen. It was about family and his commitment to the one Serena, Liz and he had created. It was about wanting to be part of that family and wanting to add to it.
Isabel was aware that Alex had not made that same commitment to her. She knew he never talked about their future, about them as a couple. She knew she was setting herself up for heartbreak but she was tired of holding back. She was tired of being cautious. If he just had a few months to give, she was going to take them and make enough memories to last a lifetime.
“Isabel, watch where you’re going!” Kyle said grabbing her arm and pulling her around the poles that had just been strung together to make a make shift corral.
“I’m so sorry!” Isabel stammered, embarrassed over her daydreaming.
“No harm.” Serena said before turning and grabbing one of the football players Kyle had recruited by the arm. “I need you over here.” She told the burly young man, pointing to the other side of the corral.
“I just wanted to make sure all was running smoothly over here. Do you need anything?” Isabel asked Kyle.
“No. We’re good. The superintendent of the school district was just here. He made sure that we knew that the school was at my disposal. It’s nice to know your charity work with the Teachers Association is paying off.”
“You obviously underestimate your own work, Kyle. If anything is given to us I assure you it has more to do with your volunteer work with the kids in this school than it has to do with my work with the teachers. I don’t think I’ve even met the superintendent personally. We have talked on the phone but never face to face. Credit where credit is due. It’s your work that opened the doors to this school.”
“Whatever.” Kyle said trying to brush off the compliment.
“I’m going to see if Jeff and Nancy need some help setting things up.” Isabel said as she walked away.
“You know she’s right” Kyle heard say from behind him.
“What?”
“You know what. You do wonderful work with these kids. They respect you and trust your leadership. I think that because of that, you have also gained the respect of the faculty at the school. They trust your judgment. This whole setup was because you threw in a good word.”
Kyle obstinately shook his head in denial. Serena grabbed his face in her hands to stop him from shaking it. “You’re a good man, Kyle. Stop denying it. The cat is out of the bag.”
Kyle grabbed Serena’s hands and pulled them away from his face. He was not much taller than her but still could boast at least 4 inches over her. “I never denied anything. You are the one that keeps shelving me in with the psychos of the world. And since you have admitted that I’m a ‘good man’, will you accept to go out on a formal date with me. Tonight, after this all wraps up?”
Serena had denied all Kyle’s requests for dates that did not involve the kids. She had quite a few reasons why she avoided getting involved with the man. Fear was on top of that list. Fear of getting emotionally involved. Fear of screwing things up and ruining a great friendship between Kyle and Josh. Fear of failing to keep his attention. She had dwelled upon each request and every time she denied herself. At this point she was getting quite feed up with the way he just did not want to get the message. She was also getting feed up with her own cowardice. It wasn’t as if they were staying local. They’d be out of Roswell before she could get involved. It wasn’t as if she couldn’t use a roll in the hay. It wasn’t as if she had not ogled at his perfectly fitting Jeans and drooled over the possibilities.
Serena licked her lips at the thought. Kyle groaned.
“Don’t take it out if your not going to use it.” He said. “Well? Are we on for tonight?”
Serena surveyed Kyle from the top of his hair to the tip of his sneakers. The perusal did not go unnoticed by Kyle who was still waiting for her answer, still holding her hands close to his chest, still hoping she say yes.
“No. Can’t do it.” Serena said flippantly as she pulled her hands out of his and turned to walk away.
Kyle let out a sigh of frustration. He wanted her so bad he ached. She was a beauty but she was also smart and funny and caring and everything he had been looking for. But she was also stubborn as a mule and she wouldn’t budge an inch. He even had thought of kidnapping her for a night on the town. Actually, it had been Josh that had suggested it. He said he was tired of having them staring at each other and that Kyle needed to take her out and get it over with.
Serena looked back at Kyle. He stood stock-still and she knew he was reigning in his temper. In some sick place in her mind she enjoyed his chase and would be sad to see it end. She then looked back at the stage were Josh sat over the edge. He looked at her and shook his head as if reprimanding her. She smiled at him and knew it was time to give in and see where things would go. She needed to trust herself and trust Kyle.
“I can’t do it tonight, but I’m free tomorrow.” She called back to Kyle.
Kyle’s head swung around to stare at her. Did he hear her right? “Tomorrow?”
Serena looked at him and grinned as she nodded. “What time?”
Josh jumped off the stage and walked past Kyle. As he looked up at his friend he saw the utter disbelief in his face and Josh rolled his eyes. ‘Adults.’ He thought ‘they can always make things so complicated’.
Cont. in Next Post.
-
starlady
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 61
- Joined: Mon Jan 07, 2002 4:59 am
- Location: New Hampshire, USA
Cont...
“Oh, Josh. Could you go outside and get another gallon of Orange Juice. People are moving in and out of here faster than we expected and we just ran out of juice.” Nancy said just as Josh arrived at the concession stand the Crashdown was sponsoring.
“But I just got here!” He whined.
Liz strolled up behind Josh and taking him by the shoulders whirled him around and grabbing his face in her hands gave him a smacking kiss on the lips, which Josh immediately swiped off with the sleeve of his shirt.
“Aunt Liz! Don’t do that here. Don’t you see half of the basket ball team AND the football team are in here.”
“If you don’t get the OJ I’ll make sure that the see the next one I give you.” Liz threatened.
“Fine! I’ll go.” Josh huffed as he walked out the side door into the parking lot where Jeff had a van with a freezer full of supplies.
“Thank you, honey. Sometimes Josh acts just like an 11 year old.” Nancy smiled as she looked at Josh’s retreating figure. “what have you been doing?”
“I just sent Michael to get more supplies for the nurses. Things are moving very nicely. We already have 200 people signed up and it’s not even noon.”
“That’s wonderful! You’ll see we’re going to find a match.” Nancy said hopefully.
“From your mouth to god’s ears.” Liz said as she moved over to the enclosed area where chairs had been setup to allow for the blood drawing process.
Many of the nurses from hospital were volunteering their time and even Liz had started to draw blood to move along the increasing line that was forming. It was a good turn out.
“Here. Where do you want me to put this down?” Michael asked walking up to Liz with a large box in his arms.
“Oh, you were so quick! Put it down over here.” Liz pointed to a table in back of the assembled row of chairs.
“Nice turn out, don’t you think?” Michael commented as he started empting the contents of the box onto the table.
Liz looked around. “I was just thinking about that. It’s still early; people usually come in the afternoon.” She turned back to look at Michael who was diligently arranging the alcohol and syringes in order. “Thanks, Michael. Thanks for coming and helping.”
Michael looked up, astonished at Liz’s gratitude over a thoughtless action. It was never a question if he would help. It was just done. He wondered in that instant if she saw him as an outsider. He furrowed his brow at the thought, but dismissed it and resumed his work “You would have done the same for my Sammy.”
She stared at him for a moment. She had in fact seen Michael as an outsider. Although he was friends with Max, he was the only one she had not known from before she left Roswell. Even though Kyle had never been part of her circle of friends in high school, he was familiar and with him spending so much time around the house, with the kids, she had grown close to him. Michael on the other hand was Maria’s husband. Someone she didn’t know well at all. Someone she shared her weekends with and joked with but there were no familiar bonds between them. Yet, she now understood why he was here. Their bond was two fold. She was his wife’s best friend and Emily was his best friend’s daughter. He understood that even though they barely knew each other, she would do the same for his children. He knew Liz loved Maria as a sister and he respected that bond and indirectly, fortified it.
She stepped beside him and putting her arms around his neck gave him an awkward hug. Michael stiffened and looked around waiting for the floor to swallow him. Liz smiled because she knew that physical affection was not top on Michael’s preference list. When she moved back she looked him in the eye and said “I would do the same for Sammy in less than a heartbeat.”
Michael gave her a quick nod and then sheepishly pointed at the registration desk a few yards away. “Um, I think I’m all done here, I think I’m going to see if they need help over at the desk.”
Liz chuckled as Michael fled the immediate vicinity.
Michael couldn’t get away fast enough. He had thought about Liz and her situation extensively. It was hard not to when your best friend was dragged into it. Well, he thought, dragged wouldn’t be the right word. He had known Max for many years and regardless of everything that was happening with Emily, Michael had never seen him happier. Max had welcomed his immediate parenthood and all the subsequent life changes it entailed. He seemed to want to immerse himself into this new life and forget there was ever a time when he had been without Liz and Emily. He had felt a bit awkward when Liz first arrived but Max always opened his life to his friend and with time he started to ease into his role as a foster uncle. He wasn’t close to Liz but he had learned to love Emily just as much as Maria. What was there not to love? He watched the child in question lunge herself into her father’s lap and start whispering into Max’s ear. Soft secrets between father and daughter. She then threw back her head in gails of laughter as Max tickled her sides. Would he have that with his daughter? Serendipously he watched Maria chat away with one of the donators, her belly prominently displayed. Just a few more weeks, he thought, and then he would know for sure.
When he finally reached the long table where forms were being filled and numbers handed out, he realized that in fact they did need help. The line was now filing out the door. Sitting in an empty spot next to Maria, he looked over his shoulder at his friend.
Max sensed someone looking at him and raised his eyes to meet Michaels. He looked a little melancholy and Max wondered if something might have happened. He smiled at his friend and Michael returned the gesture a little soberly adding a shake of his head that clearly denoted that everything was fine and he was just having a ‘Michael’ moment. Those moments of reflection that others found so out of character for a man like Michael and Max found so ‘Michael-like’. His friend was capable of deep feelings but hid the fact as if it was a flaw in his character.
Two small hands cradled his face and brought his attention back to the present.
“What are you looking at?” Emily asked.
“A chameleon”
“Where?” She asked turning in his lap.
When Max looked at Michael again, he found him already engrossed in the task of registering the people coming in. “He’s gone.”
“You didn’t tell me before it went away. I would have liked to see it.” Emily pouted.
“Don’t worry, this one shows up all the time.” He responded. Tightening his arms around his slender daughter he pulled her high onto his lap and slumped forward to cradle her body against his. He loved holding her. She was such a little thing. Stretching over her shoulder he laid a wet kiss on her cheek before he asked, “Are you excited about moving in with me?”
Emily stretched her arms over her head and put them on the back of Max’s neck. Pulling him forward so his head rested on her shoulder, she turned her head to the side and returned the wet kiss with one of her own. “It’s cool, but I’ll miss Josh.” Emily replied as she stretched languorously against Max’s chest watching the people entering the gymnasium.
“He is going to be right next door to your room. How can you miss him?” Max replied knowing that he was getting into a rat hole. The assignment of rooms had been the only sore spot in the venture to move the Whitman, Richards, Parker household into his home.
Emily sighed, “It’s not the same. Mom shouldn’t have to share a room with you. If I can’t bunk with Josh you shouldn’t have to bunk with Mommy. You and Mommy are bigger. You take up more space. You have never seen all the stuff Mommy has. She sometimes has so many books and papers on her desk that they end up on her bed. She has so many shoes; there will be no room for your stuff in the closet. I’m telling you, Dad. She needs her own room.”
Max chuckled; the rumble reverberated on Emily’s back. “You already tried that argument on me last week. You really need to come up with some new material.”
Emily turned to face Max. “I still have a couple of weeks to try to convince you of the mistake you’re making.” Pressing her forehead against his, she continued in a whiny voice. “I just don’t know why I need my own room.”
“I think Josh needs his own room too. He’s getting older and will want some privacy soon. It doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want you around, but… well… guys like to have their own space.”
“I give Josh space. He never has to pickup his things and I don’t touch his mangas, well… as long as he doesn’t touch mine.”
“I know sweetie, but things can’t stay the same. They never do. That’s how life is, it’s constantly changing and I know that at some point you are going to want your own space as well. It’s just happening sooner than later.” Max thought of all the things he wasn’t saying and felt guilty as hell. He hoped that this move would bring him closer to Liz and Emily but he also knew that the closeness that was developing between them was a predecessor to major life changes for everyone. There were so many uncertainties in their future that it was decided they would go one step at a time. He knew he was there to stay, but he had no idea where ‘there’ would eventually be. If they stayed in Roswell, which seemed the most logical solution, in his mind, that meant Josh would eventually be more than just a door away. The whole country would divide them. He wasn’t sure how Emily would handle that. And what if he moved to Boston with them? He would hope that they would move into their own house and live as a separate family unit. He wasn’t inclined in making the Whitman, Richards, Parker household into the Whitman, Richards, Parker & Evans household. That was okay for now, as a temporary solution but not as a permanent one.
“I won’t need more room but I know Mommy needs more room.” Emily stated emphatically
Max rolled his eyes.
“Need some help there?” came a voice like that of Joan of Arc. Liz pulled Emily off of Max’s lap and into her arms. Max always found the scene funny. Emily was small but Liz was just as petite and thus the picture they made when Liz carried Emily was, to some degree, funny.
“We were discussing room arrangements. AGAIN.” Max replied.
Liz gave Emily a stern look. “I don’t hear anyone else complaining about this but you. Morning, afternoon and night.”
“Josh doesn’t want to say anything but I know it bothers him too.” Emily assured her parents though Josh had said nothing to her.
“Lets put it like this.” Liz ventured “How long did you share a room with Josh?”
“A loooong time, that’s why I should be able to stay there. You know statistics show that a girl my age could be emotionally scarred by too many changes at once.”
Max stared up at his daughter and he felt like he had just been sucker punched. The child that was talking about statistics with her mother was not the same baby he had just held in his arms a few minutes ago. He was getting the feeling that he was being manipulated, and the look Liz had just sent him, as well as the mirth in her eyes had just confirmed it. He shook his head and lowered his gaze to his lap. There was so much he still needed to learn.
“Well, I think that since you spent so much time as Josh’s roommate, it’s only fair that I be allowed the same amount of time as Max’s roommate.”
“But…” Emily started to say before Liz interrupted.
“Fair is fair. Right?”
“Um…” Emily struggled to find a valid argument but she had not honed the skill of negociatian as well as her mother.
“Good!” Liz affirmed, easing Emily to the ground. “Go see if Grandma and Grandpa need help.”
Emily pouted as she took a quick glance back at Max who was looking at her with a wide smile on his face. She thought to be on the verge of triumph before her mother stepped in. Now, she knew all was loss. “Fine!”
Liz eased herself onto Max’s lap, throwing an arm over his shoulders. “I felt you drowning from all the way across the gym. You really need to work on not giving into Em. She knows exactly what’s she’s doing. She might be loving and considerate and a sweet heart but she is still a nine year old, who knows how to get what she wants.”
“Well that is where you are wrong.” Max announced, proudly raising his chin. ”There was no way she was going to win that argument. You will be sharing MY room, and that’s that! Now that everything is in the open I will not go back to sneaking around.”
“Your actions belie you, Max. Weren’t you the same man that dragged me out of here to visit the eraser room less than an hour ago?”
Slumping his shoulders a bit, he replied secretively “That’s different and you know it.”
She laughed and giving Max a swift kiss, rose from the cocoon of his arms. “I think you best go and make yourself busy. I’m going to help the nurses with the blood drawing.”
Max stood up and gave Liz a loud smack on her backside before pulling her into his arms to avoid retaliation. “Will we be visiting the eraser room before leaving?” He asked suggestively.
She grinned, “I have the keys to the building… You just need to make sure you’re around when I lock down.”
He looked down at her and wiggled his eyebrows. She gave him a pinch in the ribs so he would let her go. He did release her and laughed as he jumped back to avoid the swing that was meant to cuff him on the head. “You have got a date, M’Lady” He replied, giving her a deep bow before turning and heading over to where Kyle and Serena were still working.
Liz looked after him and sighed. Things have definitely changed, for the better, she thought. Looking around her she saw her friends and family, all working to help her and her daughter. All there to support her. All there, opening their lives and hearts to her and the cause. Things had to get better. There had been enough sadness and pain in her life. It was time for some happiness. She deserved some happiness. Everything would be all right.
TBC...
“Oh, Josh. Could you go outside and get another gallon of Orange Juice. People are moving in and out of here faster than we expected and we just ran out of juice.” Nancy said just as Josh arrived at the concession stand the Crashdown was sponsoring.
“But I just got here!” He whined.
Liz strolled up behind Josh and taking him by the shoulders whirled him around and grabbing his face in her hands gave him a smacking kiss on the lips, which Josh immediately swiped off with the sleeve of his shirt.
“Aunt Liz! Don’t do that here. Don’t you see half of the basket ball team AND the football team are in here.”
“If you don’t get the OJ I’ll make sure that the see the next one I give you.” Liz threatened.
“Fine! I’ll go.” Josh huffed as he walked out the side door into the parking lot where Jeff had a van with a freezer full of supplies.
“Thank you, honey. Sometimes Josh acts just like an 11 year old.” Nancy smiled as she looked at Josh’s retreating figure. “what have you been doing?”
“I just sent Michael to get more supplies for the nurses. Things are moving very nicely. We already have 200 people signed up and it’s not even noon.”
“That’s wonderful! You’ll see we’re going to find a match.” Nancy said hopefully.
“From your mouth to god’s ears.” Liz said as she moved over to the enclosed area where chairs had been setup to allow for the blood drawing process.
Many of the nurses from hospital were volunteering their time and even Liz had started to draw blood to move along the increasing line that was forming. It was a good turn out.
“Here. Where do you want me to put this down?” Michael asked walking up to Liz with a large box in his arms.
“Oh, you were so quick! Put it down over here.” Liz pointed to a table in back of the assembled row of chairs.
“Nice turn out, don’t you think?” Michael commented as he started empting the contents of the box onto the table.
Liz looked around. “I was just thinking about that. It’s still early; people usually come in the afternoon.” She turned back to look at Michael who was diligently arranging the alcohol and syringes in order. “Thanks, Michael. Thanks for coming and helping.”
Michael looked up, astonished at Liz’s gratitude over a thoughtless action. It was never a question if he would help. It was just done. He wondered in that instant if she saw him as an outsider. He furrowed his brow at the thought, but dismissed it and resumed his work “You would have done the same for my Sammy.”
She stared at him for a moment. She had in fact seen Michael as an outsider. Although he was friends with Max, he was the only one she had not known from before she left Roswell. Even though Kyle had never been part of her circle of friends in high school, he was familiar and with him spending so much time around the house, with the kids, she had grown close to him. Michael on the other hand was Maria’s husband. Someone she didn’t know well at all. Someone she shared her weekends with and joked with but there were no familiar bonds between them. Yet, she now understood why he was here. Their bond was two fold. She was his wife’s best friend and Emily was his best friend’s daughter. He understood that even though they barely knew each other, she would do the same for his children. He knew Liz loved Maria as a sister and he respected that bond and indirectly, fortified it.
She stepped beside him and putting her arms around his neck gave him an awkward hug. Michael stiffened and looked around waiting for the floor to swallow him. Liz smiled because she knew that physical affection was not top on Michael’s preference list. When she moved back she looked him in the eye and said “I would do the same for Sammy in less than a heartbeat.”
Michael gave her a quick nod and then sheepishly pointed at the registration desk a few yards away. “Um, I think I’m all done here, I think I’m going to see if they need help over at the desk.”
Liz chuckled as Michael fled the immediate vicinity.
Michael couldn’t get away fast enough. He had thought about Liz and her situation extensively. It was hard not to when your best friend was dragged into it. Well, he thought, dragged wouldn’t be the right word. He had known Max for many years and regardless of everything that was happening with Emily, Michael had never seen him happier. Max had welcomed his immediate parenthood and all the subsequent life changes it entailed. He seemed to want to immerse himself into this new life and forget there was ever a time when he had been without Liz and Emily. He had felt a bit awkward when Liz first arrived but Max always opened his life to his friend and with time he started to ease into his role as a foster uncle. He wasn’t close to Liz but he had learned to love Emily just as much as Maria. What was there not to love? He watched the child in question lunge herself into her father’s lap and start whispering into Max’s ear. Soft secrets between father and daughter. She then threw back her head in gails of laughter as Max tickled her sides. Would he have that with his daughter? Serendipously he watched Maria chat away with one of the donators, her belly prominently displayed. Just a few more weeks, he thought, and then he would know for sure.
When he finally reached the long table where forms were being filled and numbers handed out, he realized that in fact they did need help. The line was now filing out the door. Sitting in an empty spot next to Maria, he looked over his shoulder at his friend.
Max sensed someone looking at him and raised his eyes to meet Michaels. He looked a little melancholy and Max wondered if something might have happened. He smiled at his friend and Michael returned the gesture a little soberly adding a shake of his head that clearly denoted that everything was fine and he was just having a ‘Michael’ moment. Those moments of reflection that others found so out of character for a man like Michael and Max found so ‘Michael-like’. His friend was capable of deep feelings but hid the fact as if it was a flaw in his character.
Two small hands cradled his face and brought his attention back to the present.
“What are you looking at?” Emily asked.
“A chameleon”
“Where?” She asked turning in his lap.
When Max looked at Michael again, he found him already engrossed in the task of registering the people coming in. “He’s gone.”
“You didn’t tell me before it went away. I would have liked to see it.” Emily pouted.
“Don’t worry, this one shows up all the time.” He responded. Tightening his arms around his slender daughter he pulled her high onto his lap and slumped forward to cradle her body against his. He loved holding her. She was such a little thing. Stretching over her shoulder he laid a wet kiss on her cheek before he asked, “Are you excited about moving in with me?”
Emily stretched her arms over her head and put them on the back of Max’s neck. Pulling him forward so his head rested on her shoulder, she turned her head to the side and returned the wet kiss with one of her own. “It’s cool, but I’ll miss Josh.” Emily replied as she stretched languorously against Max’s chest watching the people entering the gymnasium.
“He is going to be right next door to your room. How can you miss him?” Max replied knowing that he was getting into a rat hole. The assignment of rooms had been the only sore spot in the venture to move the Whitman, Richards, Parker household into his home.
Emily sighed, “It’s not the same. Mom shouldn’t have to share a room with you. If I can’t bunk with Josh you shouldn’t have to bunk with Mommy. You and Mommy are bigger. You take up more space. You have never seen all the stuff Mommy has. She sometimes has so many books and papers on her desk that they end up on her bed. She has so many shoes; there will be no room for your stuff in the closet. I’m telling you, Dad. She needs her own room.”
Max chuckled; the rumble reverberated on Emily’s back. “You already tried that argument on me last week. You really need to come up with some new material.”
Emily turned to face Max. “I still have a couple of weeks to try to convince you of the mistake you’re making.” Pressing her forehead against his, she continued in a whiny voice. “I just don’t know why I need my own room.”
“I think Josh needs his own room too. He’s getting older and will want some privacy soon. It doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want you around, but… well… guys like to have their own space.”
“I give Josh space. He never has to pickup his things and I don’t touch his mangas, well… as long as he doesn’t touch mine.”
“I know sweetie, but things can’t stay the same. They never do. That’s how life is, it’s constantly changing and I know that at some point you are going to want your own space as well. It’s just happening sooner than later.” Max thought of all the things he wasn’t saying and felt guilty as hell. He hoped that this move would bring him closer to Liz and Emily but he also knew that the closeness that was developing between them was a predecessor to major life changes for everyone. There were so many uncertainties in their future that it was decided they would go one step at a time. He knew he was there to stay, but he had no idea where ‘there’ would eventually be. If they stayed in Roswell, which seemed the most logical solution, in his mind, that meant Josh would eventually be more than just a door away. The whole country would divide them. He wasn’t sure how Emily would handle that. And what if he moved to Boston with them? He would hope that they would move into their own house and live as a separate family unit. He wasn’t inclined in making the Whitman, Richards, Parker household into the Whitman, Richards, Parker & Evans household. That was okay for now, as a temporary solution but not as a permanent one.
“I won’t need more room but I know Mommy needs more room.” Emily stated emphatically
Max rolled his eyes.
“Need some help there?” came a voice like that of Joan of Arc. Liz pulled Emily off of Max’s lap and into her arms. Max always found the scene funny. Emily was small but Liz was just as petite and thus the picture they made when Liz carried Emily was, to some degree, funny.
“We were discussing room arrangements. AGAIN.” Max replied.
Liz gave Emily a stern look. “I don’t hear anyone else complaining about this but you. Morning, afternoon and night.”
“Josh doesn’t want to say anything but I know it bothers him too.” Emily assured her parents though Josh had said nothing to her.
“Lets put it like this.” Liz ventured “How long did you share a room with Josh?”
“A loooong time, that’s why I should be able to stay there. You know statistics show that a girl my age could be emotionally scarred by too many changes at once.”
Max stared up at his daughter and he felt like he had just been sucker punched. The child that was talking about statistics with her mother was not the same baby he had just held in his arms a few minutes ago. He was getting the feeling that he was being manipulated, and the look Liz had just sent him, as well as the mirth in her eyes had just confirmed it. He shook his head and lowered his gaze to his lap. There was so much he still needed to learn.
“Well, I think that since you spent so much time as Josh’s roommate, it’s only fair that I be allowed the same amount of time as Max’s roommate.”
“But…” Emily started to say before Liz interrupted.
“Fair is fair. Right?”
“Um…” Emily struggled to find a valid argument but she had not honed the skill of negociatian as well as her mother.
“Good!” Liz affirmed, easing Emily to the ground. “Go see if Grandma and Grandpa need help.”
Emily pouted as she took a quick glance back at Max who was looking at her with a wide smile on his face. She thought to be on the verge of triumph before her mother stepped in. Now, she knew all was loss. “Fine!”
Liz eased herself onto Max’s lap, throwing an arm over his shoulders. “I felt you drowning from all the way across the gym. You really need to work on not giving into Em. She knows exactly what’s she’s doing. She might be loving and considerate and a sweet heart but she is still a nine year old, who knows how to get what she wants.”
“Well that is where you are wrong.” Max announced, proudly raising his chin. ”There was no way she was going to win that argument. You will be sharing MY room, and that’s that! Now that everything is in the open I will not go back to sneaking around.”
“Your actions belie you, Max. Weren’t you the same man that dragged me out of here to visit the eraser room less than an hour ago?”
Slumping his shoulders a bit, he replied secretively “That’s different and you know it.”
She laughed and giving Max a swift kiss, rose from the cocoon of his arms. “I think you best go and make yourself busy. I’m going to help the nurses with the blood drawing.”
Max stood up and gave Liz a loud smack on her backside before pulling her into his arms to avoid retaliation. “Will we be visiting the eraser room before leaving?” He asked suggestively.
She grinned, “I have the keys to the building… You just need to make sure you’re around when I lock down.”
He looked down at her and wiggled his eyebrows. She gave him a pinch in the ribs so he would let her go. He did release her and laughed as he jumped back to avoid the swing that was meant to cuff him on the head. “You have got a date, M’Lady” He replied, giving her a deep bow before turning and heading over to where Kyle and Serena were still working.
Liz looked after him and sighed. Things have definitely changed, for the better, she thought. Looking around her she saw her friends and family, all working to help her and her daughter. All there to support her. All there, opening their lives and hearts to her and the cause. Things had to get better. There had been enough sadness and pain in her life. It was time for some happiness. She deserved some happiness. Everything would be all right.
TBC...
-
starlady
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 61
- Joined: Mon Jan 07, 2002 4:59 am
- Location: New Hampshire, USA
~*Chapter 31*~
Things hadn’t turned out all right.
“Liz, I have been in touch with her physicians and I concur with them. She should be going in once a week. Her last blood tests show that there is an increased deterioration to the cells. I know I’m not your official physician but you and Emily are more to me than just patients. You and I are friends. I have seen Emily grow. She is like a grandchild to me. I know it’s difficult to remove your self from the situation and look at this from a medical viewpoint. I struggle with it and she is not blood from my blood. But you can’t be in denial. Emily cannot afford it.” Dr Walters sighed. “I wish you would come back.”
Liz fought the tears that had been threatening to fall since she had first picked up the phone. Over a thousand people had shown up for the drive. From a medical stand point it had been a success. All those people now would be placed on the Bone Marrow Donor lists and many people would be saved because of them. Many people, but not her Emily. Not a single match for her baby. “I… I don’t think it would be the best thing to do to go back to Boston right now. Unless you have some miracle cure that would save her life.”
The fact that Emily’s physician had recommended that she receive her transfusions more often didn’t help Liz feel assured that Emily was winning her battle. She was getting weaker. She needed more naps, she bruised more often and she was losing color. All subtle changes, but when you were looking for them, easily noticed. Alex had noticed but Serena had not. Most people thought that Emily’s exhaustion was due to the move. There had been so many changes taking place in their lives, it was easy to let the little things slip. She bruised because she was packing. Since she was packing, she was tired. It was all very natural. Natural for any other child, but not Emily. She was fighting a silent battle with her body and she refused to give in.
Liz wiped the stray tear that escaped and bit back a sob. She took a deep breath and pushed the chair away from her desk. Leaning back into it, she stared at the ceiling. “Our family is here. She… and I… need their support. She has just found her father and they are very close.” Liz said trying to make her friend understand everything she did not want to say. “There is nothing to be done in Boston that cannot be done here. We are staying here.”
“I understand.” Dr. Walters conceded, “Please don’t wait to schedule her new treatments. She should be comfortable. I also suggested that they add a new drug to her treatment. It was something I stumbled on when looking at options for Emily. It isn’t anything new, but it has helped patients in the past. I’ll fax you the research I’ve done on it.”
“You think she needs to supplement her treatments?” Liz asked somewhat alarmed.
“No. Not right now. Based on the numbers and the progression so far, I would recommend it late August beginning of September. I think if a donor has not been found by then I would prefer the supplement than having her go in more often.”
Liz nodded even though no one could see her. Comfort. That is what he was talking about. It was all that could be offered. Comfort. For whom? Emily? It had to be because this was no comfort to her. “Okay.” She replied, finally noticing her mute response would not be acknowledged.
“Liz.” Walters said hesitantly “Don’t give up. She’s still strong. If something comes up, she’ll still be strong enough to go through the procedure. It’s not over.”
She wanted to laugh hysterically because hysteria was all that was left. Her small office seemed to get smaller with each passing moment. “Jeremy? I need to go. I’ll call you soon.”
“Alright. I have some time off in a few weeks. Mabel has insisted we fly down there. I told her I would talk to you about it. She says she wants to see the desert but I know she misses you and Emily dearly…”
“That would be nice. How about we talk about it some more later. I really need to go.” Liz insisted.
“Very well. I understand. Please call me for anything you might need.”
Liz started to nod but stopped herself. “Okay. Thank you, Jeremy. Give my love to Mabel.”
Putting down the receiver seemed to take Herculean strength. Her body felt so heavy with the weight of the news she didn’t think she would be able to move. Was the happiness she had felt the last few weeks the light before the darkness? Was that time just a reprieve from the pain?
The stark white walls of her office seem to close in on her. Looking at the clock over the door she realized she still had two hours to her shift. She knew there was no way she would make it. She couldn’t see another patient. Her mind was not on work but on what the news she had received meant for her. For Emily. For Max. She pressed the heel of her hands against her eyes in hopes that the pressure would somehow slow down the thoughts running around in her head. She would need to take time off. There was no way she could continue working but then what about Emily’s health insurance? Max had put her on his but Emily’s condition was pre-existing. Was she still on Alex’s? The move to Max’s house would save on the rent, but what about the other expenses? Max had wanted to take some time off as well… How could both of them do that? She looked up, absently staring at the wall in front of her. There were no answers there. She needed Max.
Getting up, Liz shuffled her paperwork into a neat pile and phoned her supervisor to let him know that she would be leaving early on a personal matter. She steadily made her way out of the office and a few minutes later, was on her way to Max’s house. She found him sitting on the stairs to the porch, obviously returning from his daily jog. It had been a while since she had done some jogging of her own and she cursed her lack of discipline. Her daily run with Josh always brought her a sense of peace and she needed that.
Max swiped the sweat from his brow with the edge of the t-shirt that hung from the waistband of his shorts. He casually looked at his watch and wondered what Liz was doing out of work so early. One look at her face told him something was wrong and his chest tightened in anticipation of bad news. He stood and met her half way up the driveway.
“What’s the matter?” He asked as he opened his arms and caught her within them.
Feeling Max’s arms around her made her feel secure, safe. It was exactly where she needed to be. “Are the kids here?”
“No. They left to get more boxes from the old house. I think Alex was going to stop by the Crashdown to get dinner. We’ve got about an hour. What’s wrong?”
“Let’s go inside.” She said pulling out of his arms. “We have to talk.”
It was as if cold water had been thrown on him. He grabbed her arm to help her into the house but more than that it was the contact of her that he fed on. As if the contact would make whatever she had to tell him less painful. Taking the lead he ushered her to the bedroom and closed the door. The few boxes that held Liz’s things scattered around the floor making the move real to both of them. He sat down on the edge of the bed and then pulled her onto his lap.
Liz looked at everything in the room and suddenly realized that the action was just an avoidance mechanism. Now that she was here, safe in Max’s closeness, she didn’t know how to proceed. Max helped her even in that.
“Just tell me.”
She looked at his handsome features and taking his face into her hands kissed him softly. He felt so good under her lips. Warm, inviting, strong. She released him and looked away. She didn’t want to see the pain that would be in his eyes. The same pain that she knew he saw in hers. “I got a call from Dr. Walters today. Actually I got a call from Dr. Johnson earlier. We discussed Emily’s recent blood tests and the results of the blood drive. Neither very uplifting.”
Max felt his stomach fall. He knew this was coming. He knew this was what had put Liz out of sorts. It was the only thing that would make her react that way. He nodded, silently asking her to continue.
“The tests show a more rapid deterioration of her blood cells. It means the disease is damaging the new blood faster. It means that she will need her treatments more often to keep her healthy. Or at least… stronger. The blood drive brought in many people but there was not a match.”
“But how? There were so many people?” Max asked in frustration. He knew that there were no guarantees but Emily just needed one match, and so many people had been to the drive. What kind of cruel joke was god playing on them?
Liz didn’t reply to his question. She knew it wasn’t asked with the expectation of a response.
After a few minutes of silence, she heard his next question.
“What are we going to do?”
She replied with the only answer she had at the moment. “I don’t know.”
It was early August. Serena and Josh would be with them for another month. Alex would have to leave a week earlier because of the timeline his company had given him. If they followed the recommendations the doctors had given them they could live as they had for the next three weeks. Then it would just be the three of them. The numbers promised one less for Christmas. Liz wanted to fight with everything in her. Try all the experimental procedures that were available but would that be some thing Emily would want? Live her last few months in the hospital? Regardless of what they did, there was the now and more practical matters to attend.
“I want to drop the residency until… until we get past all this.” Liz finally said, trying to focus on things she could do, problems she could resolve. “I know you wanted to take some time off as well. I think we need to discuss what we are going to do.”
Max’s eyes were downcast, staring into Liz’s lap, trying not to give into helplessness. Liz had pulled him out of that once. He would not give into it again.
“I’m concerned about the health insurance. We’re going to need it but yours won’t cover Emily for a while because her illness is pre-existing. Alex has us on his insurance but I don’t know what the coverage is. We need to talk to him about it and see if it’s as comprehensive as mine. I guess that is the first thing we need to do. Then we need to discuss finances before a decision is made…”
“We already discussed this Liz. I told you I have enough to cover us while I take the time off. I’ve been working and not spending, so my nest egg is of pre-historic size.”
“But now I wouldn’t be bringing in anything to the pot.” Liz said.
Max finally looked at her and tilted his mouth in a smirk, not meant to be derisive, just a way to get his point across. “And we are really going to miss that.”
Liz gave him a sad smile. She felt her chest lighten at the ability to talk to Max about these mundane issues. “I guess we wouldn’t be missing that. My student loans all have a grace period of six months so we don’t have to worry about repayment as soon as I drop out of the program.”
“You’re not dropping out… You are just taking a sabbatical.” Max stated fervently.
Liz nodded her agreement.
The next half hour was spent ironing out details. Trying to bring some order to the life they were to live. When all practical matters had been discussed the silence returned to the small room. Liz had moved off Max’s lap and he lied back onto the bed. She sat on the bed next to his prone form, his arm lying across her lap as she tangled her fingers with his.
“Do you think we should tell Emily?” Max asked quietly.
“I think she already knows she is getting weaker. She is very attuned with her body and there is no way that we can hide the fact that a match was not found. We have to tell her.”
Max nodded. “Liz…” He paused knowing the answer to his next question but needing to ask it out loud. “Is there nothing else to be done?”
There was silence for a long time before Liz answered. “Last time we had chemo done, it was very hard on her. She relapsed very soon. She didn’t want to go through that again. She said she didn’t want to give up but she wanted something that would offer her a better chance and chemo was not it. It’s a matter of quality vs. quantity. An extension to life, but at what cost? I don’t know if I can let go without a fight but then again, I’m not the one fighting, am I?”
“That’s not true. You are fighting. We are fighting. We might just be fighting our will to do more but we are doing something. We’re doing what she wants.” Although the words came from his mouth Max struggled to say them and thus realized the truth in the statement. How could they let a decision like that be made by a nine year old? What kind of parents were they to sit back and let illness ravage the body of their child?
He still dwelled on the question when the front door opened and the pounding of steps coming from the front of the house, was heard. Emily’s voice could be heard calling out to Liz just a few seconds before the door to the room was flung open and she barreled in. “Mommy! You’re home early!” she exclaimed jumping onto Max’s legs and crawling her way onto his chest.
Alex appeared at the doorway. “Sorry. She was out of the car before I had turned it off. Hope she didn’t interrupt anything.”
Max lifted his head and forced a smile at Alex. “Everything’s fine, but I think we’ll be getting a lock on that door.”
Alex looked at Max and then at Liz. Regardless of the ease in conversation, he could sense the tension in the air. “So… Every thing’s fine?” He asked enunciating each word carefully.
Liz looked at Alex and in a silent communication they had perfected over the years, let him know that things were not fine. “We’ll talk later.”
Alex nodded and silently closed the door to the room. He stood there holding the doorknob tightly. Staring out into the empty corridor, He was consumed by all the possible things that would cause the look on Liz’s face. There was only one. Emily.
Emily felt the tension as soon as the door closed, there was a quiet eeriness that had descended in the room and although it was momentary, she felt it.
“Did you eat already?” Max asked softly rubbing the small of Emily’s back.
She nodded looking down at her father, and then she shocked him. “Daddy, don’t be sad. I don’t want anyone to be sad”
Liz, who was more familiar with her daughter’s uncanny ability to read people, saved Max. “He’s not sad, sweetheart.” She said brushing the lose strands of Emily’s hair from her face “We’re just frustrated. It’s okay to be frustrated.”
Emily said nothing. After a few minutes of contemplation she nodded. “I get frustrated some time.”
“I know you do.” Liz replied “but, we’re not giving up. Right?”
Emily didn’t respond immediately. She fidgeted with her hands until finally said in a more mature voice “Mom.”
She looked up at Liz who sat in front of her “I get tired sometimes too. Is it okay to get tired sometimes?”
Max felt like a willow branch being bent by a strong gust of wind. He tried to bite his lip in an effort to gain control, in an effort to avoid breaking down in front of his child. He was amazed at the steadiness in Liz’s voice when she responded.
“We talked about this, before. It’s okay to be tired and still win the fight.”
Emily smiled, the strength back in her posture. “I can be like the sun fighting the night. Even at dusk, the beams of light are stretching, they are still fighting to be seen.”
Liz pulled Emily into her arms and cradled her small body against her breast. “Be like the sun, Em, but not at dusk. Be like the sun during an eclipse. The darkness might think it won but the light pushes it aside and shines once again.”
Max rose and engulfed both in his arms. Holding the women in his life, tight against him. “It will be alright. We’re going to get through this.”
Emily inhaled the mix scent of her parents. The arms around her strong. She felt light hearted, content with what she had done. She had brought her parents together. She contemplated what still had to be done and felt that she would have time to do it.
TBC...
Things hadn’t turned out all right.
“Liz, I have been in touch with her physicians and I concur with them. She should be going in once a week. Her last blood tests show that there is an increased deterioration to the cells. I know I’m not your official physician but you and Emily are more to me than just patients. You and I are friends. I have seen Emily grow. She is like a grandchild to me. I know it’s difficult to remove your self from the situation and look at this from a medical viewpoint. I struggle with it and she is not blood from my blood. But you can’t be in denial. Emily cannot afford it.” Dr Walters sighed. “I wish you would come back.”
Liz fought the tears that had been threatening to fall since she had first picked up the phone. Over a thousand people had shown up for the drive. From a medical stand point it had been a success. All those people now would be placed on the Bone Marrow Donor lists and many people would be saved because of them. Many people, but not her Emily. Not a single match for her baby. “I… I don’t think it would be the best thing to do to go back to Boston right now. Unless you have some miracle cure that would save her life.”
The fact that Emily’s physician had recommended that she receive her transfusions more often didn’t help Liz feel assured that Emily was winning her battle. She was getting weaker. She needed more naps, she bruised more often and she was losing color. All subtle changes, but when you were looking for them, easily noticed. Alex had noticed but Serena had not. Most people thought that Emily’s exhaustion was due to the move. There had been so many changes taking place in their lives, it was easy to let the little things slip. She bruised because she was packing. Since she was packing, she was tired. It was all very natural. Natural for any other child, but not Emily. She was fighting a silent battle with her body and she refused to give in.
Liz wiped the stray tear that escaped and bit back a sob. She took a deep breath and pushed the chair away from her desk. Leaning back into it, she stared at the ceiling. “Our family is here. She… and I… need their support. She has just found her father and they are very close.” Liz said trying to make her friend understand everything she did not want to say. “There is nothing to be done in Boston that cannot be done here. We are staying here.”
“I understand.” Dr. Walters conceded, “Please don’t wait to schedule her new treatments. She should be comfortable. I also suggested that they add a new drug to her treatment. It was something I stumbled on when looking at options for Emily. It isn’t anything new, but it has helped patients in the past. I’ll fax you the research I’ve done on it.”
“You think she needs to supplement her treatments?” Liz asked somewhat alarmed.
“No. Not right now. Based on the numbers and the progression so far, I would recommend it late August beginning of September. I think if a donor has not been found by then I would prefer the supplement than having her go in more often.”
Liz nodded even though no one could see her. Comfort. That is what he was talking about. It was all that could be offered. Comfort. For whom? Emily? It had to be because this was no comfort to her. “Okay.” She replied, finally noticing her mute response would not be acknowledged.
“Liz.” Walters said hesitantly “Don’t give up. She’s still strong. If something comes up, she’ll still be strong enough to go through the procedure. It’s not over.”
She wanted to laugh hysterically because hysteria was all that was left. Her small office seemed to get smaller with each passing moment. “Jeremy? I need to go. I’ll call you soon.”
“Alright. I have some time off in a few weeks. Mabel has insisted we fly down there. I told her I would talk to you about it. She says she wants to see the desert but I know she misses you and Emily dearly…”
“That would be nice. How about we talk about it some more later. I really need to go.” Liz insisted.
“Very well. I understand. Please call me for anything you might need.”
Liz started to nod but stopped herself. “Okay. Thank you, Jeremy. Give my love to Mabel.”
Putting down the receiver seemed to take Herculean strength. Her body felt so heavy with the weight of the news she didn’t think she would be able to move. Was the happiness she had felt the last few weeks the light before the darkness? Was that time just a reprieve from the pain?
The stark white walls of her office seem to close in on her. Looking at the clock over the door she realized she still had two hours to her shift. She knew there was no way she would make it. She couldn’t see another patient. Her mind was not on work but on what the news she had received meant for her. For Emily. For Max. She pressed the heel of her hands against her eyes in hopes that the pressure would somehow slow down the thoughts running around in her head. She would need to take time off. There was no way she could continue working but then what about Emily’s health insurance? Max had put her on his but Emily’s condition was pre-existing. Was she still on Alex’s? The move to Max’s house would save on the rent, but what about the other expenses? Max had wanted to take some time off as well… How could both of them do that? She looked up, absently staring at the wall in front of her. There were no answers there. She needed Max.
Getting up, Liz shuffled her paperwork into a neat pile and phoned her supervisor to let him know that she would be leaving early on a personal matter. She steadily made her way out of the office and a few minutes later, was on her way to Max’s house. She found him sitting on the stairs to the porch, obviously returning from his daily jog. It had been a while since she had done some jogging of her own and she cursed her lack of discipline. Her daily run with Josh always brought her a sense of peace and she needed that.
Max swiped the sweat from his brow with the edge of the t-shirt that hung from the waistband of his shorts. He casually looked at his watch and wondered what Liz was doing out of work so early. One look at her face told him something was wrong and his chest tightened in anticipation of bad news. He stood and met her half way up the driveway.
“What’s the matter?” He asked as he opened his arms and caught her within them.
Feeling Max’s arms around her made her feel secure, safe. It was exactly where she needed to be. “Are the kids here?”
“No. They left to get more boxes from the old house. I think Alex was going to stop by the Crashdown to get dinner. We’ve got about an hour. What’s wrong?”
“Let’s go inside.” She said pulling out of his arms. “We have to talk.”
It was as if cold water had been thrown on him. He grabbed her arm to help her into the house but more than that it was the contact of her that he fed on. As if the contact would make whatever she had to tell him less painful. Taking the lead he ushered her to the bedroom and closed the door. The few boxes that held Liz’s things scattered around the floor making the move real to both of them. He sat down on the edge of the bed and then pulled her onto his lap.
Liz looked at everything in the room and suddenly realized that the action was just an avoidance mechanism. Now that she was here, safe in Max’s closeness, she didn’t know how to proceed. Max helped her even in that.
“Just tell me.”
She looked at his handsome features and taking his face into her hands kissed him softly. He felt so good under her lips. Warm, inviting, strong. She released him and looked away. She didn’t want to see the pain that would be in his eyes. The same pain that she knew he saw in hers. “I got a call from Dr. Walters today. Actually I got a call from Dr. Johnson earlier. We discussed Emily’s recent blood tests and the results of the blood drive. Neither very uplifting.”
Max felt his stomach fall. He knew this was coming. He knew this was what had put Liz out of sorts. It was the only thing that would make her react that way. He nodded, silently asking her to continue.
“The tests show a more rapid deterioration of her blood cells. It means the disease is damaging the new blood faster. It means that she will need her treatments more often to keep her healthy. Or at least… stronger. The blood drive brought in many people but there was not a match.”
“But how? There were so many people?” Max asked in frustration. He knew that there were no guarantees but Emily just needed one match, and so many people had been to the drive. What kind of cruel joke was god playing on them?
Liz didn’t reply to his question. She knew it wasn’t asked with the expectation of a response.
After a few minutes of silence, she heard his next question.
“What are we going to do?”
She replied with the only answer she had at the moment. “I don’t know.”
It was early August. Serena and Josh would be with them for another month. Alex would have to leave a week earlier because of the timeline his company had given him. If they followed the recommendations the doctors had given them they could live as they had for the next three weeks. Then it would just be the three of them. The numbers promised one less for Christmas. Liz wanted to fight with everything in her. Try all the experimental procedures that were available but would that be some thing Emily would want? Live her last few months in the hospital? Regardless of what they did, there was the now and more practical matters to attend.
“I want to drop the residency until… until we get past all this.” Liz finally said, trying to focus on things she could do, problems she could resolve. “I know you wanted to take some time off as well. I think we need to discuss what we are going to do.”
Max’s eyes were downcast, staring into Liz’s lap, trying not to give into helplessness. Liz had pulled him out of that once. He would not give into it again.
“I’m concerned about the health insurance. We’re going to need it but yours won’t cover Emily for a while because her illness is pre-existing. Alex has us on his insurance but I don’t know what the coverage is. We need to talk to him about it and see if it’s as comprehensive as mine. I guess that is the first thing we need to do. Then we need to discuss finances before a decision is made…”
“We already discussed this Liz. I told you I have enough to cover us while I take the time off. I’ve been working and not spending, so my nest egg is of pre-historic size.”
“But now I wouldn’t be bringing in anything to the pot.” Liz said.
Max finally looked at her and tilted his mouth in a smirk, not meant to be derisive, just a way to get his point across. “And we are really going to miss that.”
Liz gave him a sad smile. She felt her chest lighten at the ability to talk to Max about these mundane issues. “I guess we wouldn’t be missing that. My student loans all have a grace period of six months so we don’t have to worry about repayment as soon as I drop out of the program.”
“You’re not dropping out… You are just taking a sabbatical.” Max stated fervently.
Liz nodded her agreement.
The next half hour was spent ironing out details. Trying to bring some order to the life they were to live. When all practical matters had been discussed the silence returned to the small room. Liz had moved off Max’s lap and he lied back onto the bed. She sat on the bed next to his prone form, his arm lying across her lap as she tangled her fingers with his.
“Do you think we should tell Emily?” Max asked quietly.
“I think she already knows she is getting weaker. She is very attuned with her body and there is no way that we can hide the fact that a match was not found. We have to tell her.”
Max nodded. “Liz…” He paused knowing the answer to his next question but needing to ask it out loud. “Is there nothing else to be done?”
There was silence for a long time before Liz answered. “Last time we had chemo done, it was very hard on her. She relapsed very soon. She didn’t want to go through that again. She said she didn’t want to give up but she wanted something that would offer her a better chance and chemo was not it. It’s a matter of quality vs. quantity. An extension to life, but at what cost? I don’t know if I can let go without a fight but then again, I’m not the one fighting, am I?”
“That’s not true. You are fighting. We are fighting. We might just be fighting our will to do more but we are doing something. We’re doing what she wants.” Although the words came from his mouth Max struggled to say them and thus realized the truth in the statement. How could they let a decision like that be made by a nine year old? What kind of parents were they to sit back and let illness ravage the body of their child?
He still dwelled on the question when the front door opened and the pounding of steps coming from the front of the house, was heard. Emily’s voice could be heard calling out to Liz just a few seconds before the door to the room was flung open and she barreled in. “Mommy! You’re home early!” she exclaimed jumping onto Max’s legs and crawling her way onto his chest.
Alex appeared at the doorway. “Sorry. She was out of the car before I had turned it off. Hope she didn’t interrupt anything.”
Max lifted his head and forced a smile at Alex. “Everything’s fine, but I think we’ll be getting a lock on that door.”
Alex looked at Max and then at Liz. Regardless of the ease in conversation, he could sense the tension in the air. “So… Every thing’s fine?” He asked enunciating each word carefully.
Liz looked at Alex and in a silent communication they had perfected over the years, let him know that things were not fine. “We’ll talk later.”
Alex nodded and silently closed the door to the room. He stood there holding the doorknob tightly. Staring out into the empty corridor, He was consumed by all the possible things that would cause the look on Liz’s face. There was only one. Emily.
Emily felt the tension as soon as the door closed, there was a quiet eeriness that had descended in the room and although it was momentary, she felt it.
“Did you eat already?” Max asked softly rubbing the small of Emily’s back.
She nodded looking down at her father, and then she shocked him. “Daddy, don’t be sad. I don’t want anyone to be sad”
Liz, who was more familiar with her daughter’s uncanny ability to read people, saved Max. “He’s not sad, sweetheart.” She said brushing the lose strands of Emily’s hair from her face “We’re just frustrated. It’s okay to be frustrated.”
Emily said nothing. After a few minutes of contemplation she nodded. “I get frustrated some time.”
“I know you do.” Liz replied “but, we’re not giving up. Right?”
Emily didn’t respond immediately. She fidgeted with her hands until finally said in a more mature voice “Mom.”
She looked up at Liz who sat in front of her “I get tired sometimes too. Is it okay to get tired sometimes?”
Max felt like a willow branch being bent by a strong gust of wind. He tried to bite his lip in an effort to gain control, in an effort to avoid breaking down in front of his child. He was amazed at the steadiness in Liz’s voice when she responded.
“We talked about this, before. It’s okay to be tired and still win the fight.”
Emily smiled, the strength back in her posture. “I can be like the sun fighting the night. Even at dusk, the beams of light are stretching, they are still fighting to be seen.”
Liz pulled Emily into her arms and cradled her small body against her breast. “Be like the sun, Em, but not at dusk. Be like the sun during an eclipse. The darkness might think it won but the light pushes it aside and shines once again.”
Max rose and engulfed both in his arms. Holding the women in his life, tight against him. “It will be alright. We’re going to get through this.”
Emily inhaled the mix scent of her parents. The arms around her strong. She felt light hearted, content with what she had done. She had brought her parents together. She contemplated what still had to be done and felt that she would have time to do it.
TBC...
-
starlady
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 61
- Joined: Mon Jan 07, 2002 4:59 am
- Location: New Hampshire, USA
~* Chapter 32 *~
Emily opened her eyes and stared at the unfamiliarity of the open space above her. The ceiling peered down at her as if mocking her ability to convince her father she should share her room with Josh. She hated that ceiling and demonstrated it by sticking her tongue out to it before she rolled to her side and sat up. Only a few boxes filled the room, having brought a limited amount of things to Roswell. She looked at the door that led to the bathroom connecting her room to Josh’s and wrinkled her nose in disgust.
She threw her legs over the edge of the bed but before she could get up, the demon door opened and Josh strolled in on his crutches. He sat on the edge of her bed as if he was master of this room as well as his.
“Weird, isn’t it?” Josh asked
Emily knew exactly what he was talking about and nodded her response.
“I guess that’s what dad’s are suppose to do.” He continued
“What do you mean?” Emily asked
“Haven’t you ever seen the email that has the “Application to Date my Daughter”? It’s pretty cruel.”
“So Dad’s are supposed to be cruel?” Emily asked surprised. She thought the separation was mean and unfair but not necessarily cruel.
“No, but their suppose to keep the boys away from their little girls.” Josh replied as if this knowledge was known by all of the male species.
“Well that’s silly!” Emily said still disgruntled
“It’s a guy thing” He said a bit condescendingly. In fact, Josh had thought it silly as well until Kyle had taken him to the basketball practice and the players had explained in more than elaborate detail the mystery behind the room separation.
“Well, I still think it’s dumb.” Emily said as she plopped down to the ground and put on her slippers “We’ve been best friends for a long time and we’re good at sharing a room.” She walked into the bathroom, adding for emphasis “And I’m not a little girl!”
“The thing is that even though I know you’re a brat, he still thinks you’re his little girl. I’ve been told that it never goes away. He will always see you that way.” Josh got up and leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom watching Emily brush her teeth. “It happens in reverse to the boys, so don’t feel bad about it. Moms always see the boys as being their babies.”
Emily shook her head in dismay. She didn’t think she would ever understand parents. “Is Kyle coming over today?”
“Maybe later. He has to go to the office and work. He does that on occasion.”
“Not very often. He’s always coming over.” Emily pointed out.
Josh shrugged. He enjoyed having Kyle over and even though he had to share his attentions with his Mom lately, Kyle always made time to take him out on his own. It made him feel special. He liked being with Max, and Jeff always let him hang out at the Crashdown, but Kyle made him feel as if he was important in his own right. He didn’t let Josh put limitations to his own activities, always encouraging him and going out of his way to make him feel… normal. Uncle Lala was like that, but they didn’t share as many things in common. Alex was wonderful when it came to sitting in front of a computer or when trying to build some electronic gadget but when it came to athletic stuff or just taking time off to spend exclusively with Josh… Well, Kyle was better.
“Do you think Aunt Serena takes him seriously?” Emily inquired.
Josh gave her another noncommittal shrug. At first Josh had not been too enthusiastic about Kyle’s attention to his Mom. He was concerned that Serena would do something to alienate Kyle; either by her rejection or by dating him and having something go wrong. He felt happy that, it seemed, Serena was concerned about this as well. Kyle on the other hand proved by his action that his relationship with Josh was completely separate to anything that might happen between him and Serena. Regardless of how many times she had said no, he still came around and still setup plans just for Josh.
“Would you like her to take him serious?” Emily persisted.
Josh gave a last shrug before walking past her into his own room. Emily, of course, followed. “That is not an answer, Josh.”
“It’s not up to me. Either she likes him or not.”
“I asked you if YOU would like her to take him seriously. I didn’t ask you if she was going to take him seriously.” Emily insisted.
Josh sighed as he sat on his bed and rolled up the leg of his pajama to fit on his prosthetic. “I wouldn’t mind.” He finally confessed.
Emily gleamed at him and scurried onto the bed as Josh continued his morning ritual. “Why do you think she doesn’t go for it?” Before he could give her another shrug, she added “YOUR opinion!”
Josh paused and quirked his mouth to emphasized his thought process. “I think she might be afraid of him disappearing on her, like my dad did.” More seriously, easing his facial features, he continued. “I think she’s afraid to be hurt or that I might be hurt.”
Emily was now intensely analyzing the possibilities. “Do you think he would hurt her?”
Josh returned to his non-verbal communication by shrugging. He sat thoughtfully on the edge of the bed and finally said, “I like Kyle a lot and I think he likes me too. I don’t think he would intentionally hurt Mom or me.” He then looked at Em who watched him in fascination. “That’s all we can expect from people, don’t you think? That they will not intentionally harm us?”
“Do you think it’s worth the risk to let someone into our lives that might hurt us?”
Josh smiled. He had taken that risk a long time ago. Unbeknownst to him at that time, because he was just a child, but fully aware of it now. Aunt Liz, Uncle Lala and especially Emily had the power to hurt him; yet everyday he lived holding them closer to his heart. He was 11 and yet had lived so much more than any other 11 year old. He still held onto childish things, still had an occasional tantrum but during moments like this, he knew Emily and him were not the children everyone thought they were. “I think… You need to take the risk if, in the end, you want to win the prize.”
“But what if you lose in the end?”
“You still would have won, because you were strong enough to take the risk.” Josh responded. “It’s like me with basketball or running. If I didn’t try it, I wouldn’t have known I could do it. So I would have always lived with the ‘what if’. Even if I never win medals in the sports I play, I found out I could play them and I found out because I tried. Kyle showed me that.”
Emily smiled. Josh always brought her a sense of reasoning that she could trust. It was not the lectures the adults might give. It was the strength of a friend; someone that was like her.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~
“Aunt Serena, I was thinking that maybe we could stop at that new Mexican place that Grandma and Aunt Isabel were talking about last week. It’s just a block from the Crashdown. PLEEAAASSE!”
Serena looked down at Emily who had insisted she could not go another day with out a new pair of sneakers, dragging her out on the impromptu shopping expedition. “It’s getting late, Em. Maybe another time.”
Emily put on the best puppy face she could muster and threw down her winning card. “We never spend anytime together anymore. You’re always either unpacking or off with Mom someplace. I miss our time. Please, let’s do something special?”
Serena sighed as her shoulders dropped. There was no way to say no when Emily put on her famous puppy face. She shook her head in disgust. She had no will power, no backbone. She was a wimp. “Fine. What’s this place called?”
“Margaritas!” Emily enthusiastically replied.
Less than five minutes later they walked into the brick building that bore a bright neon sign in the shape of a margarita cup. It was 6 and the evening crowd was filling up the place. Serena approached the receptionist and inquired about the wait. 45 minutes. When she returned to Emily’s side she was prepared to tell her that the excursion would have to be postponed for another day but was stopped by the sight of her son walking up to them.
“What are you doing here?” She asked in surprise.
“We got here a while ago. I thought it would be cool to eat someplace different.” Josh replied smiling up at his mother.
“Who are you here with?” Serena asked peering over his shoulder to see who was with Josh.
“Kyle.” He replied nonchalantly “Did you guys just get here?”
“Yes, but we’re leaving.” Then turning to Emily she added “The wait is just too long, Em. Maybe we can come earlier tomorrow.”
At that moment, Kyle walked up “Well. If it isn’t a family reunion!” He gave Serena a great big smile that made her knees weak. He wore a pair of worn out jeans and a white t-shirt that clung to every muscle on his body. She could feel her pulse going a mile a minute and was frustrated at how this man made her feel like a hormonal teenager every time he was in the vicinity. He was a dangerous man. “Did you guys just get here?” she heard him ask.
“Yeah, but Aunt Serena says the wait is too long.” Emily offered since said Aunt was still trying to regain her senses.
“Join us. They sat us at a booth and just delivered the drinks. I got up to get Josh so we could place our order.”
Emily quickly turned a pleading face at Serena. ”Please! Please!”
Serena gave another deep sigh and looking up at Kyle and then at Josh asked, “Are you sure?”
“Sure, it’ll be fun Mom!”
Serena accepted and followed Josh and Emily to the booth. She could feel Kyle’s hand on the small of her back and felt giddy. When they reached the booth the kids had already claimed one side and thus Kyle and her squeezed into the other side. The waiter appeared a few second later and the girls placed their order of drinks.
After some light retelling of the days activities, Emily swung her plan into full action. “So, Uncle Kyle, Why don’t you ever take me on the day trips you have with Josh? I like to watch some sports.”
Kyle looked like a deer caught in headlights. Serena stared at Emily baffled by her audacity and Josh seemed to have choked on his drink.
“Um… I…” Kyle started, struggling to come up with a plausible excuse. It wasn’t that Kyle didn’t enjoy Emily’s company but he had assumed she didn’t care for his. They chatted and joked around but he never thought she wanted to go out with them. She was usually involved with Max or Alex to pay him much attention.
Emily suddenly smacked her head as if a new dawning occurred and gifted her with a peculiar insight. “I know! It’s a guy thing. You see Josh more as a son, so it’s like a father son bonding thing you have going on.” As three sets of eyes stared at Emily, she continued. “Don’t you ever plan on marrying and having kids of your own? You know, you aren’t getting any younger. You’re almost as old as my Daddy.” Turning to Serena she asked. “Isn’t that too old to have kids?”
“I… “ Was all Serena was able to force out before Emily interrupted.
“Don’t you want more kids, Aunt Serena?”
Kyle turned and looked at Serena and she looked helplessly at him. He shook his head as he replied “Don’t look at me, I want kids. I like them.”
Her brows furrowed in annoyance before turning and smiling at Emily, whom she planned on killing as soon as they got home. “No, Emily, we are not too old to have children and yes, I would like to have another child… At some point” She added more quietly
Emily nodded as if analyzing something, then suddenly turned to Kyle once again. “Are you going to get married?”
“What?” Kyle asked surprised.
“Well, you said you wanted kids of your own, so are you going to get married?”
“Um… I guess, at some point, I will get married.”
Emily looped her arm around Josh’s shoulder in a dramatic air as she said “Since Aunt Serena is going to have more kids too, when she gets married Josh is going to have a new Daddy, like me!”
That comment had a jarring effect on Kyle. Not just because he cared deeply for Josh, who had wormed his way into his heart but also, he shockingly admitted, he didn’t want Serena having someone else’s baby. He looked despondently at Serena who stared at her refreshment lost in thought. During the 5-6 weeks Serena had been in his life he had gotten more rejection from her than any women he had ever pursued. She was skittish with her affection for him but he knew he was breaking down the wall she had around her heart. They had been out on several ‘official’ dates since the blood drive and he had taken full advantage of their time together. He remembered how she felt in his arms when it was time to say good night and there was nothing skittish about that. She seem to yearn for him as much as he did for her but by the next day she was back to being the ‘friend’ she was before. And Kyle realized that it was time she stopped playing the “one step forward, two steps back” game that had dominated their friendship. He definitely wanted more. He wanted to see her smile and hear her laugh and feel her breath when she whispered in his ear. He wanted to tangle his hand in that red hair of hers and caress that soft translucent skin.,,
Kyle was brought out of his reverie when he noticed Emily pushing Josh out of the booth. “Where are you going?” He asked.
Emily promptly answered in her bubbly fashion “I just remembered I need to meet Grandma at the Crashdown.”
“But we just got here!” Serena complained, “It was your idea to come here”
“I know, but I just forgot.” Emily whined, “Josh will take me. You stay and keep Uncle Kyle company. I think Grandpa Jeff wanted to talk to Josh anyway”
“But I wanted to…” Josh started but immediately halted his protest when he felt Emily grab the tender skin on his side and pinch it between her fingers. “EeeOww” He muttered giving his friend a death stare.
“We need to hurry” Emily said giving Josh a look that left no room for arguments.
Kyle and Serena stared with open mouths as the two kids disappeared among the crowd that had gathered in the entrance of the restaurant.
“What do you think that was all about?” Kyle asked
“I have no idea, but I assure you I will get to the bottom of it.” Serena replied before the booth was engulfed into a chasm of silence.
After a few more uncomfortable moments of silence, Kyle asked “Can I ask you something, now that we’re alone?”
Serena nodded slowly entranced by the condensation that was forming driblets of water on the side of her glass.
“About what Emily was saying earlier… Why are you so afraid of us?”
Serena swiftly looked at him. “What do you mean? I’m not scared of anyone. Who is us?”
Kyle leaned back “Us. You and me? The times we have been out you seem to enjoy being with me. At first you are usually stiff and quiet but after a little while you seem to let your guard down and you become this wonderfully vibrant woman. You are so full of life and you have a wonderful sense of humor and I think it’s safe to say that you are a very passionate woman as well. Yet, when I see you again you revert back to being skittish and reserved. Why do you do that?”
Serena stared at him, her eyes wide and filed with that reservation that Kyle had just mentioned. “I… I…”
“Is it me? Or are you like that with all men?” Kyle insisted hoping to get to the bottom of things
“Kyle… I…”
“I really like you Serena. I like everything I see in you. You’re a strong women. Funny and intelligent and beautiful and caring and… I just want to be with you, but you have this wall around you that seems impenetrable. You tease me with little glimpses of this fabulous woman before you hide her off behind those walls. I just don’t understand.”
“There is no future for us.” Serena finally said
“Why? Is it the distance?” Kyle insisted
Serena went back to staring at the glass and it’s fascinating display of condensation. “That’s one thing. I mean, my home is in Boston, you live here, it would never work out.”
“And have you never thought about moving here? By what I have seen, you are excellent at your job. The superintendent of schools was quite taken by you when he met you during the blood drive. There are plenty of positions opening here. This is not the metropolis where you have to rely on parents to substitute because of lack of teachers. There are at least three openings right here in Roswell for the fall semester. Have you thought that Josh might like living in a small town, close to his best friend.”
“How typical! It’s always the woman having to pick up her bags and move.” Serena countered.
“That’s not fair! Have you ever asked me if I was willing to move? You just prefer to assume I wouldn’t and close me out. What excuses do you give the men in Boston? Because there is no way I would believe that there are not more than a few guys that would give their right arm to be with you.” Kyle said turning in his seat to face her. “I’m not an ogre. I just want a chance to get to know you better, to be with you.”
“I’m not ready.” Serena said fidgeting in her seat under Kyle’s direct look
“When will you be ready? Tell me Serena. When will you be ready, because I will be the first knocking at your door.”
“I… I don’t know.” She whispered
“Serena, Look at me.” Kyle said but didn’t wait for the movement before he placed his hand under her chin and lifted her face to meet his.
“I’m not Josh’s dad, although I admit I love him as my own. The little feller crept up on me and I adore him. But I’m not his father. I didn’t leave you. I didn’t hurt you. Give me a chance to prove that I’m worth the risk.”
“I… I can’t” Serena said as her eyes filled with tears “I… I don’t know how to”
“Ah, sweetheart” Kyle pulled her into his arms and felt her melt against his chest. He knew that he was breaking those barriers she had built so long ago and he was filled with hope. “All you have to do is be yourself. When you feel those doubts creeping up on you, talk to me. Don’t try to convince yourself to close your heart, just let it be. I would never hurt you and I think you know it. If you thought I would hurt you, you would not let me near Josh. Deep down, you know you can trust me.”
Serena had not felt so vulnerable since Josh’s father had walked out of her life. She felt exposed and it was a feeling she thought she could not bear, but she didn’t pull away. It was the first step. She was afraid, she was terrified but she was also tired of feeling that way. She never expected to meet someone like Kyle when she decided to come to Roswell. She was comfortable with her quickie dates with men afraid of commitments. This was new territory and that was why she had kept Kyle at arms length. She didn’t want to give her heart and have it trampled. But Kyle was right. Deep down, she already trusted him. Trusted that he would not hurt her. She raised her head from where it rested against his chest and looked at the man that wouldn’t take no. “I can’t promise that I will be able to open up the way you expect. This will probably not work out… I mean there is, still, the distance. But, I… can… try.”
Kyle beamed at her. “One step at a time. We can get there, one step at a time.” Pushing back soft tendrils of her hair he cupped her face and kissed her softly.
Serena closed her eyes and relished the softness of his lips… and then she heard someone clearing their throat next to them. She opened her eyes and peeked over Kyle’s shoulder. “Um… I think the waiter is waiting to take our order.” She said putting some distance between them.
Kyle put his arm around her shoulder, tucking her safely under it before turning to the waiter. “We are going to need a few more minutes.”
TBC...
Emily opened her eyes and stared at the unfamiliarity of the open space above her. The ceiling peered down at her as if mocking her ability to convince her father she should share her room with Josh. She hated that ceiling and demonstrated it by sticking her tongue out to it before she rolled to her side and sat up. Only a few boxes filled the room, having brought a limited amount of things to Roswell. She looked at the door that led to the bathroom connecting her room to Josh’s and wrinkled her nose in disgust.
She threw her legs over the edge of the bed but before she could get up, the demon door opened and Josh strolled in on his crutches. He sat on the edge of her bed as if he was master of this room as well as his.
“Weird, isn’t it?” Josh asked
Emily knew exactly what he was talking about and nodded her response.
“I guess that’s what dad’s are suppose to do.” He continued
“What do you mean?” Emily asked
“Haven’t you ever seen the email that has the “Application to Date my Daughter”? It’s pretty cruel.”
“So Dad’s are supposed to be cruel?” Emily asked surprised. She thought the separation was mean and unfair but not necessarily cruel.
“No, but their suppose to keep the boys away from their little girls.” Josh replied as if this knowledge was known by all of the male species.
“Well that’s silly!” Emily said still disgruntled
“It’s a guy thing” He said a bit condescendingly. In fact, Josh had thought it silly as well until Kyle had taken him to the basketball practice and the players had explained in more than elaborate detail the mystery behind the room separation.
“Well, I still think it’s dumb.” Emily said as she plopped down to the ground and put on her slippers “We’ve been best friends for a long time and we’re good at sharing a room.” She walked into the bathroom, adding for emphasis “And I’m not a little girl!”
“The thing is that even though I know you’re a brat, he still thinks you’re his little girl. I’ve been told that it never goes away. He will always see you that way.” Josh got up and leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom watching Emily brush her teeth. “It happens in reverse to the boys, so don’t feel bad about it. Moms always see the boys as being their babies.”
Emily shook her head in dismay. She didn’t think she would ever understand parents. “Is Kyle coming over today?”
“Maybe later. He has to go to the office and work. He does that on occasion.”
“Not very often. He’s always coming over.” Emily pointed out.
Josh shrugged. He enjoyed having Kyle over and even though he had to share his attentions with his Mom lately, Kyle always made time to take him out on his own. It made him feel special. He liked being with Max, and Jeff always let him hang out at the Crashdown, but Kyle made him feel as if he was important in his own right. He didn’t let Josh put limitations to his own activities, always encouraging him and going out of his way to make him feel… normal. Uncle Lala was like that, but they didn’t share as many things in common. Alex was wonderful when it came to sitting in front of a computer or when trying to build some electronic gadget but when it came to athletic stuff or just taking time off to spend exclusively with Josh… Well, Kyle was better.
“Do you think Aunt Serena takes him seriously?” Emily inquired.
Josh gave her another noncommittal shrug. At first Josh had not been too enthusiastic about Kyle’s attention to his Mom. He was concerned that Serena would do something to alienate Kyle; either by her rejection or by dating him and having something go wrong. He felt happy that, it seemed, Serena was concerned about this as well. Kyle on the other hand proved by his action that his relationship with Josh was completely separate to anything that might happen between him and Serena. Regardless of how many times she had said no, he still came around and still setup plans just for Josh.
“Would you like her to take him serious?” Emily persisted.
Josh gave a last shrug before walking past her into his own room. Emily, of course, followed. “That is not an answer, Josh.”
“It’s not up to me. Either she likes him or not.”
“I asked you if YOU would like her to take him seriously. I didn’t ask you if she was going to take him seriously.” Emily insisted.
Josh sighed as he sat on his bed and rolled up the leg of his pajama to fit on his prosthetic. “I wouldn’t mind.” He finally confessed.
Emily gleamed at him and scurried onto the bed as Josh continued his morning ritual. “Why do you think she doesn’t go for it?” Before he could give her another shrug, she added “YOUR opinion!”
Josh paused and quirked his mouth to emphasized his thought process. “I think she might be afraid of him disappearing on her, like my dad did.” More seriously, easing his facial features, he continued. “I think she’s afraid to be hurt or that I might be hurt.”
Emily was now intensely analyzing the possibilities. “Do you think he would hurt her?”
Josh returned to his non-verbal communication by shrugging. He sat thoughtfully on the edge of the bed and finally said, “I like Kyle a lot and I think he likes me too. I don’t think he would intentionally hurt Mom or me.” He then looked at Em who watched him in fascination. “That’s all we can expect from people, don’t you think? That they will not intentionally harm us?”
“Do you think it’s worth the risk to let someone into our lives that might hurt us?”
Josh smiled. He had taken that risk a long time ago. Unbeknownst to him at that time, because he was just a child, but fully aware of it now. Aunt Liz, Uncle Lala and especially Emily had the power to hurt him; yet everyday he lived holding them closer to his heart. He was 11 and yet had lived so much more than any other 11 year old. He still held onto childish things, still had an occasional tantrum but during moments like this, he knew Emily and him were not the children everyone thought they were. “I think… You need to take the risk if, in the end, you want to win the prize.”
“But what if you lose in the end?”
“You still would have won, because you were strong enough to take the risk.” Josh responded. “It’s like me with basketball or running. If I didn’t try it, I wouldn’t have known I could do it. So I would have always lived with the ‘what if’. Even if I never win medals in the sports I play, I found out I could play them and I found out because I tried. Kyle showed me that.”
Emily smiled. Josh always brought her a sense of reasoning that she could trust. It was not the lectures the adults might give. It was the strength of a friend; someone that was like her.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~
“Aunt Serena, I was thinking that maybe we could stop at that new Mexican place that Grandma and Aunt Isabel were talking about last week. It’s just a block from the Crashdown. PLEEAAASSE!”
Serena looked down at Emily who had insisted she could not go another day with out a new pair of sneakers, dragging her out on the impromptu shopping expedition. “It’s getting late, Em. Maybe another time.”
Emily put on the best puppy face she could muster and threw down her winning card. “We never spend anytime together anymore. You’re always either unpacking or off with Mom someplace. I miss our time. Please, let’s do something special?”
Serena sighed as her shoulders dropped. There was no way to say no when Emily put on her famous puppy face. She shook her head in disgust. She had no will power, no backbone. She was a wimp. “Fine. What’s this place called?”
“Margaritas!” Emily enthusiastically replied.
Less than five minutes later they walked into the brick building that bore a bright neon sign in the shape of a margarita cup. It was 6 and the evening crowd was filling up the place. Serena approached the receptionist and inquired about the wait. 45 minutes. When she returned to Emily’s side she was prepared to tell her that the excursion would have to be postponed for another day but was stopped by the sight of her son walking up to them.
“What are you doing here?” She asked in surprise.
“We got here a while ago. I thought it would be cool to eat someplace different.” Josh replied smiling up at his mother.
“Who are you here with?” Serena asked peering over his shoulder to see who was with Josh.
“Kyle.” He replied nonchalantly “Did you guys just get here?”
“Yes, but we’re leaving.” Then turning to Emily she added “The wait is just too long, Em. Maybe we can come earlier tomorrow.”
At that moment, Kyle walked up “Well. If it isn’t a family reunion!” He gave Serena a great big smile that made her knees weak. He wore a pair of worn out jeans and a white t-shirt that clung to every muscle on his body. She could feel her pulse going a mile a minute and was frustrated at how this man made her feel like a hormonal teenager every time he was in the vicinity. He was a dangerous man. “Did you guys just get here?” she heard him ask.
“Yeah, but Aunt Serena says the wait is too long.” Emily offered since said Aunt was still trying to regain her senses.
“Join us. They sat us at a booth and just delivered the drinks. I got up to get Josh so we could place our order.”
Emily quickly turned a pleading face at Serena. ”Please! Please!”
Serena gave another deep sigh and looking up at Kyle and then at Josh asked, “Are you sure?”
“Sure, it’ll be fun Mom!”
Serena accepted and followed Josh and Emily to the booth. She could feel Kyle’s hand on the small of her back and felt giddy. When they reached the booth the kids had already claimed one side and thus Kyle and her squeezed into the other side. The waiter appeared a few second later and the girls placed their order of drinks.
After some light retelling of the days activities, Emily swung her plan into full action. “So, Uncle Kyle, Why don’t you ever take me on the day trips you have with Josh? I like to watch some sports.”
Kyle looked like a deer caught in headlights. Serena stared at Emily baffled by her audacity and Josh seemed to have choked on his drink.
“Um… I…” Kyle started, struggling to come up with a plausible excuse. It wasn’t that Kyle didn’t enjoy Emily’s company but he had assumed she didn’t care for his. They chatted and joked around but he never thought she wanted to go out with them. She was usually involved with Max or Alex to pay him much attention.
Emily suddenly smacked her head as if a new dawning occurred and gifted her with a peculiar insight. “I know! It’s a guy thing. You see Josh more as a son, so it’s like a father son bonding thing you have going on.” As three sets of eyes stared at Emily, she continued. “Don’t you ever plan on marrying and having kids of your own? You know, you aren’t getting any younger. You’re almost as old as my Daddy.” Turning to Serena she asked. “Isn’t that too old to have kids?”
“I… “ Was all Serena was able to force out before Emily interrupted.
“Don’t you want more kids, Aunt Serena?”
Kyle turned and looked at Serena and she looked helplessly at him. He shook his head as he replied “Don’t look at me, I want kids. I like them.”
Her brows furrowed in annoyance before turning and smiling at Emily, whom she planned on killing as soon as they got home. “No, Emily, we are not too old to have children and yes, I would like to have another child… At some point” She added more quietly
Emily nodded as if analyzing something, then suddenly turned to Kyle once again. “Are you going to get married?”
“What?” Kyle asked surprised.
“Well, you said you wanted kids of your own, so are you going to get married?”
“Um… I guess, at some point, I will get married.”
Emily looped her arm around Josh’s shoulder in a dramatic air as she said “Since Aunt Serena is going to have more kids too, when she gets married Josh is going to have a new Daddy, like me!”
That comment had a jarring effect on Kyle. Not just because he cared deeply for Josh, who had wormed his way into his heart but also, he shockingly admitted, he didn’t want Serena having someone else’s baby. He looked despondently at Serena who stared at her refreshment lost in thought. During the 5-6 weeks Serena had been in his life he had gotten more rejection from her than any women he had ever pursued. She was skittish with her affection for him but he knew he was breaking down the wall she had around her heart. They had been out on several ‘official’ dates since the blood drive and he had taken full advantage of their time together. He remembered how she felt in his arms when it was time to say good night and there was nothing skittish about that. She seem to yearn for him as much as he did for her but by the next day she was back to being the ‘friend’ she was before. And Kyle realized that it was time she stopped playing the “one step forward, two steps back” game that had dominated their friendship. He definitely wanted more. He wanted to see her smile and hear her laugh and feel her breath when she whispered in his ear. He wanted to tangle his hand in that red hair of hers and caress that soft translucent skin.,,
Kyle was brought out of his reverie when he noticed Emily pushing Josh out of the booth. “Where are you going?” He asked.
Emily promptly answered in her bubbly fashion “I just remembered I need to meet Grandma at the Crashdown.”
“But we just got here!” Serena complained, “It was your idea to come here”
“I know, but I just forgot.” Emily whined, “Josh will take me. You stay and keep Uncle Kyle company. I think Grandpa Jeff wanted to talk to Josh anyway”
“But I wanted to…” Josh started but immediately halted his protest when he felt Emily grab the tender skin on his side and pinch it between her fingers. “EeeOww” He muttered giving his friend a death stare.
“We need to hurry” Emily said giving Josh a look that left no room for arguments.
Kyle and Serena stared with open mouths as the two kids disappeared among the crowd that had gathered in the entrance of the restaurant.
“What do you think that was all about?” Kyle asked
“I have no idea, but I assure you I will get to the bottom of it.” Serena replied before the booth was engulfed into a chasm of silence.
After a few more uncomfortable moments of silence, Kyle asked “Can I ask you something, now that we’re alone?”
Serena nodded slowly entranced by the condensation that was forming driblets of water on the side of her glass.
“About what Emily was saying earlier… Why are you so afraid of us?”
Serena swiftly looked at him. “What do you mean? I’m not scared of anyone. Who is us?”
Kyle leaned back “Us. You and me? The times we have been out you seem to enjoy being with me. At first you are usually stiff and quiet but after a little while you seem to let your guard down and you become this wonderfully vibrant woman. You are so full of life and you have a wonderful sense of humor and I think it’s safe to say that you are a very passionate woman as well. Yet, when I see you again you revert back to being skittish and reserved. Why do you do that?”
Serena stared at him, her eyes wide and filed with that reservation that Kyle had just mentioned. “I… I…”
“Is it me? Or are you like that with all men?” Kyle insisted hoping to get to the bottom of things
“Kyle… I…”
“I really like you Serena. I like everything I see in you. You’re a strong women. Funny and intelligent and beautiful and caring and… I just want to be with you, but you have this wall around you that seems impenetrable. You tease me with little glimpses of this fabulous woman before you hide her off behind those walls. I just don’t understand.”
“There is no future for us.” Serena finally said
“Why? Is it the distance?” Kyle insisted
Serena went back to staring at the glass and it’s fascinating display of condensation. “That’s one thing. I mean, my home is in Boston, you live here, it would never work out.”
“And have you never thought about moving here? By what I have seen, you are excellent at your job. The superintendent of schools was quite taken by you when he met you during the blood drive. There are plenty of positions opening here. This is not the metropolis where you have to rely on parents to substitute because of lack of teachers. There are at least three openings right here in Roswell for the fall semester. Have you thought that Josh might like living in a small town, close to his best friend.”
“How typical! It’s always the woman having to pick up her bags and move.” Serena countered.
“That’s not fair! Have you ever asked me if I was willing to move? You just prefer to assume I wouldn’t and close me out. What excuses do you give the men in Boston? Because there is no way I would believe that there are not more than a few guys that would give their right arm to be with you.” Kyle said turning in his seat to face her. “I’m not an ogre. I just want a chance to get to know you better, to be with you.”
“I’m not ready.” Serena said fidgeting in her seat under Kyle’s direct look
“When will you be ready? Tell me Serena. When will you be ready, because I will be the first knocking at your door.”
“I… I don’t know.” She whispered
“Serena, Look at me.” Kyle said but didn’t wait for the movement before he placed his hand under her chin and lifted her face to meet his.
“I’m not Josh’s dad, although I admit I love him as my own. The little feller crept up on me and I adore him. But I’m not his father. I didn’t leave you. I didn’t hurt you. Give me a chance to prove that I’m worth the risk.”
“I… I can’t” Serena said as her eyes filled with tears “I… I don’t know how to”
“Ah, sweetheart” Kyle pulled her into his arms and felt her melt against his chest. He knew that he was breaking those barriers she had built so long ago and he was filled with hope. “All you have to do is be yourself. When you feel those doubts creeping up on you, talk to me. Don’t try to convince yourself to close your heart, just let it be. I would never hurt you and I think you know it. If you thought I would hurt you, you would not let me near Josh. Deep down, you know you can trust me.”
Serena had not felt so vulnerable since Josh’s father had walked out of her life. She felt exposed and it was a feeling she thought she could not bear, but she didn’t pull away. It was the first step. She was afraid, she was terrified but she was also tired of feeling that way. She never expected to meet someone like Kyle when she decided to come to Roswell. She was comfortable with her quickie dates with men afraid of commitments. This was new territory and that was why she had kept Kyle at arms length. She didn’t want to give her heart and have it trampled. But Kyle was right. Deep down, she already trusted him. Trusted that he would not hurt her. She raised her head from where it rested against his chest and looked at the man that wouldn’t take no. “I can’t promise that I will be able to open up the way you expect. This will probably not work out… I mean there is, still, the distance. But, I… can… try.”
Kyle beamed at her. “One step at a time. We can get there, one step at a time.” Pushing back soft tendrils of her hair he cupped her face and kissed her softly.
Serena closed her eyes and relished the softness of his lips… and then she heard someone clearing their throat next to them. She opened her eyes and peeked over Kyle’s shoulder. “Um… I think the waiter is waiting to take our order.” She said putting some distance between them.
Kyle put his arm around her shoulder, tucking her safely under it before turning to the waiter. “We are going to need a few more minutes.”
TBC...
-
starlady
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 61
- Joined: Mon Jan 07, 2002 4:59 am
- Location: New Hampshire, USA
Hi all,
It's been a long time! Sorry it has taken me so long in updating this fic but RL has been too busy for much. My daughter is getting ready to select a college and with SAT's and campus visits, there has been little time available for writing.
But, alas, I did finish the next chapter and it will give you a good idea where things are headed. So enjoy!
~S
~* Chapter 33 *~
The afternoon had turned into a scorcher. Liz had peeled off the thin, button down blouse she wore over her tank top hours ago. Looking at Maria, she cringed. Summers in Boston were nothing compared to New Mexico and the thought of being 8 and a half months pregnant in the heat that descended on them made her lightheaded.
“I don’t know how you do it. I would be naked in a sunken tub if I had to carry around the load you do.” Liz commented as she pulled a pack of Twinkies from the grocery bags.
“That’s why I called freezer duty” Maria replied laughing as she stood in front of the open door of the freezer, rearranging the meat that already resided in there to make way for the pieces that they had just purchased.
“There is just so much hamburger and pork chops you can stuff in there before you have to close the door and return to the land of the sun lord.” Liz paused and picking up a damp paper towel wiped her brow for the 5th time since they had entered the house. “I think I need to pump up the thermostat and get the AC moving. I’m going to die if the house doesn’t cool down.”
“I told you not to fidget with it. Max plays with the darn thing all the time and then has to call Michael to come and fix it. I swear the man doesn’t have a clue when it comes to home repairs. At least he was smart enough to contract out the changes to the playroom.”
Liz moved to the hallway and stared at the small digital unit that was attached to the wall. “It says 70 but I know it must be at least 95 in here. Thank god the kids are still at the old house finishing up the loading. We wouldn’t hear the end of it if they had to be here and the first mouth I would need to stuff shut would be Serena’s”
Maria chuckled as she continued her task. “Liz, you are such a woos! You’ve spent too much time in Boston. Your blood has run cold. It’s not that bad! We just came in, our bodies will cool down in a few minutes.”
Liz moved and grabbed Maria by the arm as she pulled her over to the kitchen table. “Well, I think we should just sit down until that happens. I think we need a break. Now, Sit!”
Maria shook her head. “Woos!”
Liz went back to the kitchen and pulled two water bottles from the refrigerator before returning to sit across from Maria. Pushing one bottle in Maria’s direction, she uncapped the other and took a deep swig. “Ahhh! Gotta Love it!”
Maria drank her fill and, putting the bottle down looked at her friend. “I’m so happy for you and Max. It’s about time you two got together.”
Liz felt her face warm and knew that she was blushing. It was embarrassing as hell to blush at her age! She shrugged, not really knowing what to reply.
Maria chuckled, enjoying her friend’s discomfort. “I think Max somehow knew you would come back and waited all these years.” Sobering she added “Now, all we need to do is find Emily a donor and we will all live happily ever after.”
Liz gave Maria a soft smile. “It’ll happen. We just need to hope for the best”
“I just don’t get it!” Maria said exasperated by the whole situation. “I know that you said she needs a match but why can’t an ALMOST match work? I mean for gods sake! You and Max are her parents! You should be able to donate what needs to be given and it should be enough! You carried her in you for 9 months! You should have all the DMV she needs!”
“That would be DNA. And yes, I did share my DNA with her but it’s not a matter of DNA. The problem lies in her immune system. If the bone marrow doesn’t match precisely then Emily’s body will see it as an alien entity and her body is going to try to protect itself from the invasion. It will fight it off.”
“But I thought you said the chemo and radiation where going to kill her immune system?” Maria argued.
“Yes, but that’s to allow the new bone marrow a chance. If the new marrow is too different what little is left will try to fight it. You see when we are born we are born with a clean slate. No distinguishable signatures in our marrow, but as soon as we join the world we create a distinct signature and that makes the matching. Max and I have our own signatures but when we put it together we create one that is similar to Emily’s. That is why siblings are the best chance for the match. Because that come from the same batch of ingredients, so to say. God forbid, but if your new baby is born in need of a transplant, it is most likely that it can receive one of yours because the baby’s slate is clean.” Liz paused for a moment thinking over what she had just said.
“Well, why don’t you and Max have another baby? Wasn’t there a case like that a few years ago? The parents decided to have another baby to save their daughter? You and Max should have another baby!” Maria suggested enthusiastically. “Maybe you’ll have another girl and we can marry her off to my Sammy, then we can be related!” Maria almost preened at the wise remark.
Liz wasn’t listening. She was still thinking. Her mind, going a mile a minute, had fastened itself on her previous comments. The baby arrived with a clean slate. Even though the baby wasn’t a match and it would immediately create it’s own “signature” with the baby came marrow that would never develop it’s own signature, it was a part that was discarded but had stem cells that could have growth if harvested.
“Liz?” Maria called noticing the wide-eyed look on her friends face. “Liz, are you all right?”
Maria extended her hand and touched Liz’s in an effort to pull her back to reality. Liz’s eyes focused on her friend and grasped the offered hand. “Chica, Are you okay? You kinda spaced out for a minute.”
“Maria!” Liz exclaimed breathlessly. Standing up she paced to the counter and then returned to the table where she quickly grabbed Maria’s hands in hers. ‘It might work’ She thought. There was no risk for Maria or for her baby… What if, for Emily’s type of disease, this procedure was not an option? But Maybe….
Liz tried to calm down but it was a futile effort. Pulling a chair to sit in front of Maria, Liz took hold of both of her friend’s hands. “Maria, while I was talking to you, it occurred to me that there might be an option for Emily.”
Maria narrowed her eyes looking at Liz carefully. There was an excitement in her eyes, a new ‘something’ that had not been there since she had walked in to the gymnasium during the blood drive. Maria recognized it as hope. Her eyes widen and she squeezed Liz’s hands. “What is it Liz? This must be something big because I haven’t seen you this excited since… Well… since… What is it, Liz?”
Liz started babbling a mile a minute leaving Maria in the dust. She talked about the new baby and the birth and some type of cell that could be harvested and a bunch of other things that made no sense to Maria. The only thing that was clear was that this was a real chance and Maria’s new baby would bring this hope to life.
“I don’t know if this procedure will be an option for Emily’s type of illness but Dr Walters is just a phone call away and will tell me.” Liz concluded, still trying to grasp the possibilities that had presented themselves all of a sudden. She had gotten up to pace during her explanation but now returned to sit in front of Maria. “What do you think? Is it something that you…” Liz was loss for words. How do you ask someone to save your baby without demanding it? Without screaming that it had to be done? Without forcing the decision onto them?
“Liz? Are you asking me if I am willing to do this? Because if you are, I think I might just slap you!” Maria said pulling on Liz’s arms, shaking some sense into her pale face. “I was willing to give you my bone marrow, why would you think I would hesitate in giving you my baby’s afterbirth?”
Liz’s head fell onto Maria’s lap, the little bit that was not occupied by her belly. She sobbed then. Deep retching sobs that tore at Maria’s heart. She passed her hand over Liz’s head “What is it?”
“I’m afraid.” Liz replied between breaths “I’m so afraid to hope. I’m so afraid that something is going to come and rip it away from me like always. Max says I’m so strong and I keep telling him I’m a coward. I… I’m so scared sometimes I can’t breath.”
Maria pulled Liz into her arms and held her tight. “You are the bravest and strongest woman I have ever met, Liz. If I were going through what you have, I would be a blabbering idiot and ready for a mental hospital. I would have had a breakdown a long time ago. Yet, look at you. Your mind is always thinking of ways to save Emily. You came to confront your past, you rallied the community into helping you, and you pull hope out of idle chitchat. And even though you sit here and declare how afraid you are, part of you is already making that phone call to the Dr. to confirm your suspicions. Part of you is already making plans and figuring out a way to make this all work out. That is what makes you strong and brave. You don’t let your fears stand in your way.”
Liz looked up into her friend’s eyes and that strength they were talking about took root once again in her. She was once again in control, once again the warrior fighting against the odds. She stood up solemnly and with a quick nod of her head rushed out of the kitchen into the bedroom just beyond the corridor to call Jeremy Walters.
TBC...
It's been a long time! Sorry it has taken me so long in updating this fic but RL has been too busy for much. My daughter is getting ready to select a college and with SAT's and campus visits, there has been little time available for writing.
But, alas, I did finish the next chapter and it will give you a good idea where things are headed. So enjoy!
~S
~* Chapter 33 *~
The afternoon had turned into a scorcher. Liz had peeled off the thin, button down blouse she wore over her tank top hours ago. Looking at Maria, she cringed. Summers in Boston were nothing compared to New Mexico and the thought of being 8 and a half months pregnant in the heat that descended on them made her lightheaded.
“I don’t know how you do it. I would be naked in a sunken tub if I had to carry around the load you do.” Liz commented as she pulled a pack of Twinkies from the grocery bags.
“That’s why I called freezer duty” Maria replied laughing as she stood in front of the open door of the freezer, rearranging the meat that already resided in there to make way for the pieces that they had just purchased.
“There is just so much hamburger and pork chops you can stuff in there before you have to close the door and return to the land of the sun lord.” Liz paused and picking up a damp paper towel wiped her brow for the 5th time since they had entered the house. “I think I need to pump up the thermostat and get the AC moving. I’m going to die if the house doesn’t cool down.”
“I told you not to fidget with it. Max plays with the darn thing all the time and then has to call Michael to come and fix it. I swear the man doesn’t have a clue when it comes to home repairs. At least he was smart enough to contract out the changes to the playroom.”
Liz moved to the hallway and stared at the small digital unit that was attached to the wall. “It says 70 but I know it must be at least 95 in here. Thank god the kids are still at the old house finishing up the loading. We wouldn’t hear the end of it if they had to be here and the first mouth I would need to stuff shut would be Serena’s”
Maria chuckled as she continued her task. “Liz, you are such a woos! You’ve spent too much time in Boston. Your blood has run cold. It’s not that bad! We just came in, our bodies will cool down in a few minutes.”
Liz moved and grabbed Maria by the arm as she pulled her over to the kitchen table. “Well, I think we should just sit down until that happens. I think we need a break. Now, Sit!”
Maria shook her head. “Woos!”
Liz went back to the kitchen and pulled two water bottles from the refrigerator before returning to sit across from Maria. Pushing one bottle in Maria’s direction, she uncapped the other and took a deep swig. “Ahhh! Gotta Love it!”
Maria drank her fill and, putting the bottle down looked at her friend. “I’m so happy for you and Max. It’s about time you two got together.”
Liz felt her face warm and knew that she was blushing. It was embarrassing as hell to blush at her age! She shrugged, not really knowing what to reply.
Maria chuckled, enjoying her friend’s discomfort. “I think Max somehow knew you would come back and waited all these years.” Sobering she added “Now, all we need to do is find Emily a donor and we will all live happily ever after.”
Liz gave Maria a soft smile. “It’ll happen. We just need to hope for the best”
“I just don’t get it!” Maria said exasperated by the whole situation. “I know that you said she needs a match but why can’t an ALMOST match work? I mean for gods sake! You and Max are her parents! You should be able to donate what needs to be given and it should be enough! You carried her in you for 9 months! You should have all the DMV she needs!”
“That would be DNA. And yes, I did share my DNA with her but it’s not a matter of DNA. The problem lies in her immune system. If the bone marrow doesn’t match precisely then Emily’s body will see it as an alien entity and her body is going to try to protect itself from the invasion. It will fight it off.”
“But I thought you said the chemo and radiation where going to kill her immune system?” Maria argued.
“Yes, but that’s to allow the new bone marrow a chance. If the new marrow is too different what little is left will try to fight it. You see when we are born we are born with a clean slate. No distinguishable signatures in our marrow, but as soon as we join the world we create a distinct signature and that makes the matching. Max and I have our own signatures but when we put it together we create one that is similar to Emily’s. That is why siblings are the best chance for the match. Because that come from the same batch of ingredients, so to say. God forbid, but if your new baby is born in need of a transplant, it is most likely that it can receive one of yours because the baby’s slate is clean.” Liz paused for a moment thinking over what she had just said.
“Well, why don’t you and Max have another baby? Wasn’t there a case like that a few years ago? The parents decided to have another baby to save their daughter? You and Max should have another baby!” Maria suggested enthusiastically. “Maybe you’ll have another girl and we can marry her off to my Sammy, then we can be related!” Maria almost preened at the wise remark.
Liz wasn’t listening. She was still thinking. Her mind, going a mile a minute, had fastened itself on her previous comments. The baby arrived with a clean slate. Even though the baby wasn’t a match and it would immediately create it’s own “signature” with the baby came marrow that would never develop it’s own signature, it was a part that was discarded but had stem cells that could have growth if harvested.
“Liz?” Maria called noticing the wide-eyed look on her friends face. “Liz, are you all right?”
Maria extended her hand and touched Liz’s in an effort to pull her back to reality. Liz’s eyes focused on her friend and grasped the offered hand. “Chica, Are you okay? You kinda spaced out for a minute.”
“Maria!” Liz exclaimed breathlessly. Standing up she paced to the counter and then returned to the table where she quickly grabbed Maria’s hands in hers. ‘It might work’ She thought. There was no risk for Maria or for her baby… What if, for Emily’s type of disease, this procedure was not an option? But Maybe….
Liz tried to calm down but it was a futile effort. Pulling a chair to sit in front of Maria, Liz took hold of both of her friend’s hands. “Maria, while I was talking to you, it occurred to me that there might be an option for Emily.”
Maria narrowed her eyes looking at Liz carefully. There was an excitement in her eyes, a new ‘something’ that had not been there since she had walked in to the gymnasium during the blood drive. Maria recognized it as hope. Her eyes widen and she squeezed Liz’s hands. “What is it Liz? This must be something big because I haven’t seen you this excited since… Well… since… What is it, Liz?”
Liz started babbling a mile a minute leaving Maria in the dust. She talked about the new baby and the birth and some type of cell that could be harvested and a bunch of other things that made no sense to Maria. The only thing that was clear was that this was a real chance and Maria’s new baby would bring this hope to life.
“I don’t know if this procedure will be an option for Emily’s type of illness but Dr Walters is just a phone call away and will tell me.” Liz concluded, still trying to grasp the possibilities that had presented themselves all of a sudden. She had gotten up to pace during her explanation but now returned to sit in front of Maria. “What do you think? Is it something that you…” Liz was loss for words. How do you ask someone to save your baby without demanding it? Without screaming that it had to be done? Without forcing the decision onto them?
“Liz? Are you asking me if I am willing to do this? Because if you are, I think I might just slap you!” Maria said pulling on Liz’s arms, shaking some sense into her pale face. “I was willing to give you my bone marrow, why would you think I would hesitate in giving you my baby’s afterbirth?”
Liz’s head fell onto Maria’s lap, the little bit that was not occupied by her belly. She sobbed then. Deep retching sobs that tore at Maria’s heart. She passed her hand over Liz’s head “What is it?”
“I’m afraid.” Liz replied between breaths “I’m so afraid to hope. I’m so afraid that something is going to come and rip it away from me like always. Max says I’m so strong and I keep telling him I’m a coward. I… I’m so scared sometimes I can’t breath.”
Maria pulled Liz into her arms and held her tight. “You are the bravest and strongest woman I have ever met, Liz. If I were going through what you have, I would be a blabbering idiot and ready for a mental hospital. I would have had a breakdown a long time ago. Yet, look at you. Your mind is always thinking of ways to save Emily. You came to confront your past, you rallied the community into helping you, and you pull hope out of idle chitchat. And even though you sit here and declare how afraid you are, part of you is already making that phone call to the Dr. to confirm your suspicions. Part of you is already making plans and figuring out a way to make this all work out. That is what makes you strong and brave. You don’t let your fears stand in your way.”
Liz looked up into her friend’s eyes and that strength they were talking about took root once again in her. She was once again in control, once again the warrior fighting against the odds. She stood up solemnly and with a quick nod of her head rushed out of the kitchen into the bedroom just beyond the corridor to call Jeremy Walters.
TBC...
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starlady
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 61
- Joined: Mon Jan 07, 2002 4:59 am
- Location: New Hampshire, USA
Hi All...
It's been Forever and a day.
I have been super busy and it will get worse before it gets better.
This is my daughter's senior year and we have been visiting colleges and things of the sort. It's a big decision that she must make and I want to give her all the tools so she can make an informed decision.
Today is her b'day (she turned 17) and tomoorow her first day of school. The last month has been crazy and I don't expect a reprieve until she send in her applications (some time in November).
I will try to squeeze in a few lines of this fic before then but I will stop at promising. I really want to finish this story, there is not much left.
I hope you all hang in there.
Thanks !
Sandy
It's been Forever and a day.
I have been super busy and it will get worse before it gets better.
This is my daughter's senior year and we have been visiting colleges and things of the sort. It's a big decision that she must make and I want to give her all the tools so she can make an informed decision.
Today is her b'day (she turned 17) and tomoorow her first day of school. The last month has been crazy and I don't expect a reprieve until she send in her applications (some time in November).
I will try to squeeze in a few lines of this fic before then but I will stop at promising. I really want to finish this story, there is not much left.
I hope you all hang in there.
Thanks !
Sandy