The Object of my Affection(AU, M/L, Teen/Adult) [WIP]

[baby_bre]

Thanks for the lovely Banner Chione

Title: The Object of my Affection
Author: Baby_Bre
Genre: AU
Couples: M/L , CC
Rating: Teen/Adult
Disclaimer: The characters of Roswell do not belong to me. It belongs to Jason Katims, Melinda Metz and some other peoples.
Summary: Can't really summarize, read to find out
Author’s Note: I hope you like this fic! This was written for my friends Elena and Ruby and Alondra... Because they're all talented and awesome . Oh and there will be quite a bit of sad parts in this but don't worry I'm a happy ending sort of gal.

Forgot to thank Ruby for the help with the title!!! *hugs!*

And thanks to my new beta maxandliz4ever1357 for all the hard work

Chapter one

I've been in love with Max Evans for nearly five years. It's been a long road of stolen glances, chats in the halls with Maria, and doing whatever I could to hang out with him. We're friends; I realize by the way I'm talking that it sounds like I've never said so much as two words to him, that he doesn't even know I exist which is so untrue. Max knows I'm alive, just not in the way I want him to.

He was originally just friends with Maria, who is my best friend. When we started High School they were actually pretty close, which is why I found it so difficult to confide in her. In fact, it took me a whole year to work up the courage to tell her that I really digged him. I didn't know how to let her know. And besides, at the time everyone kept insisting I liked Kyle.

They used to tease me and I would smile; not because I liked Kyle but because usually where Kyle went his brother went too. It wasn't like I disliked Kyle either; quite the opposite. he definitely had a way of making a girl feel special. I have to admit, Kyle was pretty charming, but it just didn't work for me. That and he was also a huge player.

After finally telling Maria that I liked Max she went into complete freak out mode and practically tossed us together at every chance she got. Not that I minded because, in truth, I didn't. I was ecstatic to be spending all this time with him. We started hanging out at my house a lot; Max, Maria, Tess and I had a lot of fun together. The problem at the time being was he seemed to have this thing for Tess; Maria's little sister.

"Liz? Earth to Lizzie." My best friend's voice lulls me out of my thoughts. That and the snapping of her fingers in front of my face.

It's been a while since I let myself think of Max... okay lie, more like it's been a long time since I last saw him. In the middle of our Sophmore year he moved schools and we didn't see him nearly as much. By the beginning of our Junior year we stopped seeing him all together and after much begging and pleading on my part I found out his family had moved out of Roswell.

"Sorry, thinking." I apologize and wait for Maria to go on with whatever it was she was going on about.

It's not like I haven't been with other guys; I mean I dated Doug for like 3 months the summer before my Sophmore year and he was actually pretty cool, but Max was always there on the back of my mind. I was always wondering what he was doing or if he was seeing someone.

"About ....." She starts, probably naming off all the guys in her head that I've liked, because Maria seems to think that everything revolves around guys. But then I guess in her world, it does. "James?" She asks, talking about my older sister's roommate. I admit I had a crush on him. He was cute and he gave me butterflies, but my feelings weren't the same for him as they were for Max.

"How'd you know?" I ask, humoring her. I knew she meant well and that's why I love her so much.

"Lucky guess." She says with a smile.

"So, the real question is who are you taking to the dance?" I ask, changing the subject; something I'm extremely good at doing. I didn't want her talking about James. He turned out to be a real jerk.

"I'm not sure. Tess thinks I should ask Michael."

"Kyle's friend?"

"Yeah. He was Kyle's friend." She says with a look of curiousity, "You're not still thinking about Max are you?"

"No, of course not." I tell her with my chin held high. "I am so over that."

"Good!" She exclaims putting her arm through mine. "Because there'd be serious trouble if you weren't."

"What do you mean?"

"You know... the whole Tess thing."

"Tess doesn't like him..." I point out, feeling confused as to what Maria was getting at.

"I know that, but we also know that he liked Tess." She tells me. "I just don't want you getting hurt because of some jerk who's going to lust over our little sister."

She says 'our ' because I've known Tess since she was a little girl, and that's what she is to me; my little sister.

"Yeah, thanks so much for reminding me." I state, heading off in another direction. I love Maria but I have to get away; I can't stand knowing he liked Tess.

[baby_bre]

I totally love all of you for the FB! It made my day

~Ruby~ Oh how I love you ! I'm glad you like the title since you thought of it ! Hehehe Liz wishes she was over Max !

dreamer19 Tess is loosely based off of my best friends little sister (who's like my little sister) so trust me she's a sweetie in this fic! And they lost touch because Max moved thanks for reading!!!

taressa05 Aww I'm so glad you're going to stick with this even with all the angst. I'm a happy ending kind of gal and tend not to read really sad fics so I can relate! Thanks for reading !

orphyfets Thanks!

RASaero611 Thanks!

rachelsroswell Aww I'm glad you're going to be reading this! I really hope I don't disappoint you or anyone else because I've never wrote a fic that had a bunch of angst in it, so I'll do my best !

Now onto the next part!


Chapter Two


I am so bored! Seriously, this class is taking too long to get over with. People say that I'm such a school girl but really I'm not. I hate school and I hate going to class. However I know how much my parents would kill me if they found out I was skipping.

After about five minutes the bell finally rings and I am able to leave for lunch. I totally hate how the last class before lunch and the last class before school's out seem to take like three hours to get over with.

I haven't spoken to Maria since before school, so she probably thinks I'm pissed at her for bringing up the whole Max and Tess situation considering she knows how jealous I was back then. I couldn't help it; it always seemed like no matter how hard I tried I was never enough to catch his eye. He always had them on her and it pissed me off.

The only relief I had back then was that I knew Tess didn't feel the same way for him. And even if she did she knew how I felt about him, and she would never do anything to hurt our friendship. That is one of the many reasons I love Tess. She is a lot more sympathetic in some areas then her sister. Don't get me wrong I love my best friend, but there are times when I feel like she doesn't understand how sad I get or how hard I take things, but Tess does.

"Lizzie!"

I turn around and am greeted with the smiling face of the one and only Tess Deluca. Everyone thinks Maria is the younger sister and Tess is the older one. Knowing Tess I don't see how people can say that.

Tess is a ball of fun; she's always smiling and giggling. It's no wonder guys like her so much. I mean, I don't think there's been one guy Tess has liked that hasn't liked her back. I've been told it's her happy go lucky attitude and always smiling face that guys find so attractive.

I suppose it doesn't help my guy situation that I'm overly shy. People tend to think I don't know how to speak, since I barely utter more then two words in one sitting and I hardly ever smile. It's just who I am. I'm not one for showing a lot of emotion and I like blending into my surroundings; becoming invisible. It's easier that way; if you're not noticed then no one says anything to you. I also don't like taking chances and trying to get to know anyone.

I think all the tormenting from my younger years has gotten to me. I used to be big; not huge but big and no one let me forget it. I had people laugh at me, tease me, and just embarrass me all the way up until my Freshman year. I was still big but in high school that fact didn't seem to matter to anyone. Sure there were occasions when people would make rude comments, and the guys ignored me and pretended like I didn't exist, but I learned to live with that.

I'm not big anymore since I lost the weight during the summer before and during my Junior year, but sometimes I miss it. The extra weight was like a shield; a block between me and the human race. Now I have guys that try and talk to me, but I don't pay them any attention. I know they only like me for one reason; my body.

I know this because some of them are the same guys who used to laugh at me or look the other way when I'd be coming down the hall. My attitude has something to do with that as well because I still have my shield up. I'm still shy and even though the weight's gone the insecure and scared-to say-her-own-opinions girl is still there.

"Are you even listening?"

Sometimes Tess sounds just like Maria. I turn a bright pink color because I haven't been paying attention a word she's been saying. I know it's rude of me but I can't seem to get my mind out of my thoughts lately. It's like I'm caught up in them.

"Oh yeah, sorry. What were you saying?" I ask.

She lets out a sigh and goes on. "I was saying that this weekend Maria and me are going to the club and I think you should go with us."

"I've never been to a club," I tell her before adding, "And besides I don't know how to dance!"

It's true; I've never danced before. Okay, so maybe I have danced before but not like a real dance or anything; just fooling around.

"So? We'll show you." She tells me with another smile and I smile back at her. Sometimes I think her smile is infectious.

"Fine." I relent and we head to lunch. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so quick to comply with whatever they want.

[baby_bre]

If I had more time I'd write individual replies but I don't so just know that I'm reaaaaally glad you all are reading my story! I really appreciate it and it helps me work harder on it.



Chapter Three



Don't you just hate how when you're dreading something time seems to fly by, but when you want it to speed up it takes forever to get through the day? Well I certainly didn't want Saturday to get here because it's the day that Maria and Tess have decided we were going to shake our booties. I don't shake my booty, and I especially don't do it in front of a bunch of strangers.

But they would not take no for an answer, which is the only reason I'm standing here wearing the smallest piece of black cloth I've ever seen. It's also the reason I'm wearing shoes that should be made illegal due to the fact that if I fall I'm going to break my neck.

It sucks how now that I've lost most of my extra weight, it's harder to blend in. I know how strange that sounds; you'd think a big person would stand out more, but that's just not the case. People tend to look over what they don't want to see.

It really goes to show just how shallow people are. It also points out the biggest reason why I cared about Max. He never once treated me differently because of my weight. I mean, it's true that he never liked me as more then a friend, but he didn't let my weight problem affect what he thought of me. When Max spoke to me in the halls, he would always smile and flirt. He made me feel special and the biggest part was, Max didn't try to ignore my existence when he was with his friends.

Okay so I was shy but I knew that I was a beautiful person, inside and out. I didn't need to lose weight to know I was beautiful. I didn't lose weight for myself, and I didn't lose weight because to found myself ugly or unattractive when I looked in the mirror.

I'm embarrassed to say that I just wanted everyone to see what I saw everyday; to see the little things that made me who I was. I hate that I let other people's thoughts about me affect how I thought about myself. I shouldn't have allowed stupid people's opinions and judgments to dictate how I lived my life. What they thought shouldn't have mattered, only what I thought of myself. But the thing is, their opinions did matter, even is they shouldn't have.

I thought losing weight would bring out the real me; the person I am around my friends. I thought it would help me come out of my shell and make me feel more confident, but I was wrong. I guess the grass isn't always greener on the other side. I don't feel any different; I look different and people see me differently, but I'm still the same girl I was before and I suppose there's no changing that.

"You look soooo hot!" Maria gushes as she makes me do a little twirl.

"No..." I disagree pulling on the sides of my dress in hopes that I can get the fabric to go a bit longer. "Are you positive this is a dress?" I ask for the fifth time since I've put it on.

"Yes!"

"Well, it looks more like a shirt to me." I inform her, biting my lip abd I looking in the mirror.

"That's because you're used to wearing shirts that practically go down to your knees sweetie." She says, winking at me.

"Maybe, but I'm still not sure about this. Maybe I should wear something else?" I suggest hopefully as Tess begins pinning my hair up. I don't look half bad, but I feel really uncomfortable. This is just too girly for me.

"No, you're not changing!" Maria answers. "I like how you look and so will everyone at the club! Lets get going!"

*****

We've been here for almost an hour now, and I haven't danced once. I was asked to dance by a few guys but I don't really want to. I feel like I'm going to die if I go on that dance floor with a guy. Which I know is unlikely; dying from dancing, but what if I mess up? What if I step on him? What if I trip? Any one of those things could very well happen and then I would die of humiliation.

Maria and Tess have no problem whatsoever with dancing. They've been doing it since we got here, and now I'm not even sure why I was invited. Did they just need someone to come along to hold their coats? Because I haven't talked to them once and that's all I've been doing; holding their coats while they go dance.

I am being such a downer; no wonder they've never invited me before. I can't blame them because it's not their fault that I'm not dancing. They're not stopping me; I am. I just wish they'd be just a bit more sympathetic. I stick out here and everyone knows I don't belong. Ok, maybe I'm being a little paranoid thinking that everyone is staring when clearly they aren't, but I can't seem to help it.

"Liz!" Maria yells, coming over to me. "Get out there!" She orders.

"I'm not much in the mood for dancing," I tell her with a forced smile. My hands feel sweaty and I bite my lip.

"Why not?" She asks looking at me with that skeptical expression of hers.

"I don't know; I guess I'm just not feeling well." I say before letting out a sigh. "Actually I think I'm just going to take off."

"No way, you did not spend 2 hours getting ready to come to this club just to go home!" She protests and I roll my eyes. I don't care if I spent five hours getting ready. I don't want to be here and that's it. I shouldn't be forced to stay somewhere I don't want to be.

"Ria, really I'm tired."

"No, you're going to dance at least once, and I have the perfect person for you to dance with!" She says tugging on my arm. I know I shouldn't be wishing for this, but I have butterflies in my stomach and it's all in knots because a huge part of me is hoping it's Max.

I'm lead over to this table up by the juice bar, "Liz, look who's here..."

I look up and my smile instantly fades. it's not Max; it's James, aka psycho boy. Dancing with him is like punishment for something I haven't done. I hate him! Maria doesn't know this because my older sister Yasmine didn't want anyone to know how messed up James was to her. So I guess can't really be upset with Maria over this; I'm just a bit disappointed.

Sorry no Max in this chapter!! But don't worry he'll be in the next!

[baby_bre]

Don't have time to do individual FB but thanks to everyone who left it. Its really helpful and inspires me to keep writing on this fic


Chapter Four


Liz," James addresses me as his eyes glide up and down my body. "You look different."

"Unfortunately we can't say the same for you." I say. I wrap my arms around myself, feeling more than a little uncomfortable with the way he's staring at me. He never used to look at me like that.

"Now, now is that anyway to speak to an old friend?" He asks. I want to take his hat off his head and shove it down his throat.

"You're not an old friend, you're an old leech."

I'm not at all surprised at the look of shock that passes over Maria's features. I mean, she doesn't have a clue about what went down between Yasmine, James and I. Why didn't I tell my best friend, who I've told everything to since 5th grade about my experience with James? Because I was embarrassed that I allowed James to flirt with me, to make me feel sorry for him, and to make me do things for him. I had gotten myself tangled into his trap and my older sister had to bail me out.*

It's kind of strange how when you really want something, it's never as great as you imagined it would be once you finally get it. I used to dream about being thin; about how good it'd feel and how I'd look like everyone else. I even used to dream up situations where I'd show all of the people who made fun of me that I was thin, and they'd accept me.

I dreamt of how good it would feel to see the surprise on everyone's face, but when it actually happened it didn't feel good at all. It felt empty and I hated how the people that always made me feel like I wasn't good enough suddenly wanted to be around me. It's what I wanted; to be accepted, but once I got it I realized that I never should have wanted it in the first place. Which is why I want to smack James over the head at this very moment. He never use to look at me like this, and he shouldn't start now.

"What's going on?" Maria finally speaks, her eyes glued to my face.

Biting my lip, I shrug. "Nothings going on, right James?" I ask.

"Yeah, we're just playing around." he replies.

Maria nods, but I can tell she's not satisfied with that answer. Not that I blame her; it's the lamest answer I've ever heard.

"So, are you guys going to dance then?" Maria prods.

"No." I blurt out a little too quickly.

"But you have to!" She whines and I roll my eyes. "It's only one dance." she continues.

"I'm not dancing with James," I said firmly. I won't cave; not even for my best friend.

"You only wish you were." James puts in with a wink , and I want to kick him.

"No, you wish that I would take pity on you." I snap.

"Whatever." he says, turning towards the people he's sitting with. I watch as he whispers something in their ears and they all get up to leave. "It's been fun, but we have to get rolling." he says.

I make a face and turn back towards Maria. I'm sick of this! Why did I have to see James tonight? Why couldn't it have been Max!? Well, it could be that Max isn't in Roswell, Liz.

"I'm going home." I announce.

"What? Why?" Maria protests.

"Because--" I start, but Tess comes over and interrupts me. She's dragging a very familiar looking male with her.

"Guess who's in town?" Tess says, her curls bouncing around her face as she smiles brightly.

"Kyle!" Maria says, surprise evident in her voice.

"Hello ladies." He replies.

My stomach's already tied in knots. It's Kyle. Kyle as in Kyle Kyle; Max's older brother. I can't believe my luck; I mean I wished Max would be here...but wait, if Kyle's here, where's Max?

"It's been so long." Maria says and I watch as my best friend turns on her charm. she doesn't like Kyle, but she's a big flirt.

"Too long." Kyle says flashing us a 100 watt smile.

"So, where's Max?" Maria asks, taking the words right out of my thoughts. I'm thankful for my friend's nosy nature because it saved me from having to ask. If Maria asks no one thinks anything of it, but if I were to ask they'd think something was up.

"He's at home." Kyle says, and my stomach drops to my feet. He's not here? As in he didn't come to the club? Or is he at home home; as in he's not in Roswell with Kyle?

"Home?" Tess questions.

"You guys don't know?" Kyle asks, incredulous.

"Know what?" We ask.

"We moved back last week."

"Seriously!?" Maria exclaims with a bright smile. I'm sure she's happy about this. Her best male friend is back in town for good.

"Yeah, our parents were transferred back." Kyle says.

"That's awesome!" Tess states, giggling. "I can't wait for us to all hang out like old times."

I stay quiet, still reeling from the information. Max is in Roswell. Sure, he isn't at the club like I hoped he'd be, but this is just as good. It means I'm going to see him at school, and he'll finally see me! I can't believe it; for the first time since I lost weight I feel happy about someone seeing it. I want Max to see me thin; I want to see how he reacts.

"You all know I can't wait; getting to hang out with three beautiful girls. What more could I ask for?"Kyle says. I blush bright red as Kyle takes in all of our apperances. I can see it registering on his face that I look different, but he doesn't comment. I always liked that Kyle used to flirt with me the same way he did with all the other girls. He didn't exclude me because I was shy, awkward, and chubby.

"I see some things haven't changed." Maria says.

"You know it Ria, I would never change." Kyles answers, grinning.

"Still the biggest flirt." Maria replies with a laugh.

"No, I'm second. I'd say Tess is first." He says, sticking his tongue out at Tess. I'd have to say that's one of the biggest things they all have in common. Tess flirts all the time like Kyle, and Maria flirts a lot but usually she doesn't realize she's doing it.

"Liar." Tess denies.

"You know it's true Tessy." Kyle teases.

"Don't call me that." Tess snaps. I would usually stick around all night and listen to them bicker, but I can't. I have to go home home and absorb all this new information; before my mind goes into overload and circuits out.

"Well guys, I have to be going." I tell them.

"What, why?" Kyle questions and I can see the curiosity in his eyes.

"I told my mom I'd be home early." I'm sure they know I'm lying, but I don't care. I can safely say I'm not a club-going girl; I don't like being around all these people. I don't give Maria and the others time to insist that I stay. Instead I practically run for the exit.

*****


When I get home I quickly change into my favorite pair of PJ's and grab a water bottle from the fridge. thankfully, my parents are already sleeping, so I don't have to tell them every little detail of my evening.

"LIZ..." I hear someone calling my name. I ignore the first two times, but fear settles in after the third time I hear it. I don't know where it's coming from.

"Come outside!"

I hesitantly go over to my window and stick my head out. it's Max! What is he doing here? My stomach's in knots again and my breath's coming out quicker. I don't know what to do! I look like crap, I feel sick, and here he is at my bedroom window. Would it be terribly rude of me to close the window and pretend I never saw him?

"What?" I call down, trying not to show how nervous and excited I am to see him.

"Can I come up?" He says, motioning to the ladder.

"Umm, sure." I say. I don't know what to do! Am I dreaming again?

It takes him a minute to climb the ladder, and then he's there, standing in front of me. This isn't the same as in my dream; he's in the flesh, I can smell him. I want to grab him and pull him to me but I know I can't.

"Cute PJ's." He says, chuckling.

"Don't diss on the duckies." I say, blushing. I can't believe he's seeing me like this, but in a way I'm glad. I mean, what better way then to break the awkwardness?

"I would never." He promises, laughing. His laughter makes my heart swell and I think I'm going to turn into a puddle of mush. I love his laugh; I missed it. I also missed his smile, his eyes, and his voice. Seeing him in real life is so much better then seeing him in my dreams!

"What are you doing here Max?" I question, my eyes roaming over him and drinking in every inch.

"I came to see you." He says, and his words ring over and over in my head. I came to see you.

"Why?" I question.

He ignores my question and it seems like I'm imaging him pulling me into his arms, but I'm not. I feel safe with his arms wrapped tightly around me. I snuggle into his embrace, allowing this moment to wash over me. I don't want to believe it's real because I don't want to have to pull back. But it is real, and I don't want him to know what I'm feeling, so I pull away.

It feels like forever before we step away from each other. He flashes me a smile and then he's gone, and I'm standing here wondering if he was ever really here, or if I had imagined it.

[baby_bre]

orphyfets, flyawayraven, RASaero611, janesdilemma, taressa05, WildSphinx, kittens, g7silvers: Thanks sooo much to ya'll for giving me FB! I love it. Soon like in the next chapter or so you'll find out if it was a dream.


Special thanks to my beta! She makes it possible for my writing to make sense


Chapter Five


By the time school rolls around Monday morning I'm more than convinced I dreamt the whole situation up. I won't dare tell Maria or Tess about my "encounter" with Max because I don't want them thinking I'm crazy, or that I've taken one too many hits to the head. I mean, it's not entirely my fault that I can't figure out if he was really there or not. I just wanted to see him so badly the other night, and then I learned that he was in town which most likely caused me to conjure up the whole scene in my head.

"Liz where have you been all morning?" Maria asks, waving a hand in front of my face. She tends to do a lot these days.

I guess I have been kind of distant since my meeting with Max the other night, but it's hard not to get lost in my own thoughts. I mean, was he really there, or did I just imagine it? I guess the only way to find out is if he brings it up when I see him later today. And I know I'll see him, because according to dear ol' Michael he has a few classes with us. I can't decide if this information is good or bad.

"Sorry, I just have a lot on my mind." I tell her by way of explanation. Satisfied, Maria goes back to looking through her notebook.

Part of me is still curious as to why Max didn't mention the fact that I've lost weight. I mean, I don't think he's like Kyle. I know Kyle noticed but he's not the type I expected to mention it. He would think it would make me uncomfortable, or it would come out sounding like being big was a bad thing. Max on the other hand, didn't treat me differently than all the skinny girls, but I know that my weight was something he noticed.

I don't know how to explain it but Max is the one person I wanted to see me thin. I dreamed night after night about his reaction, and then I get no reaction whatsoever and it's like thrown me off course.

"Where's Tess?" I ask looking at my watch. She was supposed to meet us here like 10 minutes ago.

"She said something about having to talk to someone this morning." Maria says and I nod, feeling uneasy. I don't know why, but I have this sinking feeling in my stomach.

"Talk to who?" I ask, trying to act casual.

Maria shrugs, "I don't know, somebody...." she trails off and pulls a paper out of her stack.

"Oh," I say, going back to spacing off. I'm so tired! I want to fall asleep already and school's just started.


*****


"Alex," I call out, hoping he'll here me among the noisy hallway. Luckily for me he turns around and I'm greeted with his smile. I love Alex; really I do. He's Tess's best friend's boyfriend, and Maria and I have been good friends with him for a long time now.

"What's up Liz?" He asks, waiting until I've caught up with him to speak.

"Nothing much, have you seen Tess?" I ask anxiously. I need to find Tess. I've finally worked up the nerve to tell her about my encounter with Max and I want to know what she has to say about it. I've thought long and hard about telling Maria, but I know her and she'll think I'm whacked. I love my best friend but sometimes our baby sis is a lot more sympathetic to my feelings then Ria is.

"Isabel said she's not here yet." He tells me and I sigh. That's exactly what Ria told me, but why can't she get here already? I just know if I wait too long to tell somebody that I'm never going to tell them, and I really need some advice on the situation.

"Oh, well thanks." I say, sighing.



*****



I can't believe my eyes! Tess and Max walked into school together, late. I mean they weren't holding hands or anything like that but why are they together and late? Why are they late together? It doesn't make any sense. Well yeah, I guess it does; Max must be the person Tess needed to meet. But why did Max want to see Tess? Does this mean he still likes her?

I return my gaze to my locker, unable to continue watching them. I have to busy myself with getting the things I was getting before they showed up. What was the point those two coming in today anyway? I mean it's nearly lunch time and they've just gotten here.

"Liz," Tess says, her voice cracking into my thoughts as I restrain myself from rolling my eyes. I don't turn around because ,in all honesty, I don't want to see her smiling face and I don't want to see him.

She must have just noticed me and decided to come say hi, but why? Tess isn't the type of person who likes rubbing things in other people's faces; at least not when she knows it'll hurt their feelings and in this case she definately knows it'll hurt me.

"Tess." I say taking a deep breath and turning around. I'm greeted with their smiling faces. "Max." I greet, his name coming out coolly. I don't want to remember his eyes, his arms around me, the way he smelled, or how good it felt to finally feel safe.

Tess's eyes scan my face and I can tell she's worried because her permantent smile falters a bit. Then the moment is gone and before I know it, it's back in place and she's the smiling, bubbly Tess that we all know and love.

"Is anything wrong?" Max asks, and his voice ties my stomach in more knots.

"Everything's peachy." I snap. "Why would anything be wrong?" I ask accusingly. Do they really think just because they showed up late together that I'm just going to wig out? Okay, maybe I am freaking out a little, but do they actually think I'd let them see that?

He shrugs and looks down the hall. I know this is awkward, but it is their fault after all. They're the ones who decided it'd be quaint to come over and have a chat.

"Well, nothing is wrong, so I'm just going to..." I trail off and point in the direction of the quad. "It was nice seeing you guys." I call over my shoulder and then I'm out of the there.

[baby_bre]

Chapter Six


I know that I probably seemed like a psycho to them but seeing them walk in together, knowing they had been off doing whatever, I just couldn't bear to talk to them. Why did they have to come over, I was still dealing with whether or not Max had really been up there on my balcony and now I'm thinking not because if he had been why would he be with her?

I love Tess, don't get me wrong she is one of the most caring and considerate people normally. I would kill for her but then at that moment I felt like ripping her curly blonde hair out. And this is what's confusing, why did I want to hurt her? That's why I had to get away from there.

I'm standing at my locker when Maria comes over, "Tess said you went bonkers, you okay?"

I turn around, feeling a little mad that she would tell Ria about what happened. "Yes... I'm fine." I put a bright smile on because I don't want to worry Maria anymore then I have to. She's already been wondering how I am taking Max's arrival and I don't want her thinking I can't handle seeing her sister with him.

"I don't know why she was with him." She offers, "I mean I know they were just talking but Tess told me she was over him."

"I know." Sometimes she can be a little harsh, but not overally it's just like why does she have to talk about them? Doesn't she know me well enough to know not to?

************

Am I really being snappy with everyone? Alex says so and I think I am but I was going to tell Tess all about my encounter with Max and then this happens. Now I can't tell her because she'll be all like Liz I'm sorry but it didn't happen because why would my new boyfriend come to your balcony? Or why would someone who likes ME go visit YOU? Tess isn't normally like that but how am I meant to know if she'll be rude?

I liked when I had my little sis all figured out and now I don't, I could ask her but I feel stupid about asking her. Maybe I should tell Maria about Max showing up, even though part of me is seriously doubting he even came over the other part of me doesn't get how I could dream the whole thing up because I'm not like that. Or I didn't think I was.

((I know short but I'm in a hurry))

[baby_bre]

Chapter Seven


My stomachs doing flip flops and I think I'm going to get sick. Guess whos in my Science class? That's right, Max. I don't know what to say to him but he's sitting right in front of me and he keeps looking up and smiling. I really want to speak to him but at the sametime what if he's with Tess? What if the balcony thing didn't happen? What if it did? I feel really awkward now and I don't know what to say, hey is too lame and did you come to visit me the other night seems a bit rushed.

So maybe sitting here and saying nothing is really the way to go. I hope he doesn't think I'm strange but then he's not saying anything either so why should I? Maybe he feels awkward because of my strange attitude earlier? I want him to talk to me, honestly I want him to smile and talk to me like he did the night on my balcony but he doesn't seem to want to.

The problem with his being in my science class is that Maria's in here and yeah I love Maria but he keeps talking to her and I know Maria doesn't like him but I still can't help feeling a bit jealous. I like him a lot and he's talking to her and not me. It's like he's pretending I don't exist for the moment and he knows that when he talks to her it makes me feel like he's ignoring me. Damn. I am weird, why am I getting all worked up over this? He isn't anything to me and Maria's my best friend and they're friends, they were friends first so I shouldn't be upset about this but sometimes I can't help it.

"I'm so self-centered." I mutter and glare down at my desk.

"What?" Max's soft voice asks and I look up and shrug.

"Nothing." It comes out low but I'm sure he heard me and if not I guess that's his problem. I'm a big baby, I'm acting like a spoiled little brat and I can't seem to stop.

"Okay." He's confused, I can hear it in his voice but whatever I'm not going to explain to him that I am in love with him, that I haven't stopped liking him and that I'm a jealous freak who keeps getting upset over every little thing that has to do with him and other girls. I wish Kyle was here, he always knows what to say to make me feel more confident around his brother but Kyle's not here and it wouldn't work anyway.

"Liz." Maria kicks me under the table and looks at Max with a smile. "I was just telling Max that we should all go see a movie."

"Oh yeah?" I reply with little enthusiasm. "Whos we?"

"Max, obviously. Tess. Kyle. Michael. Me and you." She says and winks so that Max can't see.

"Oh. Cool."

"You okay?" Max asks and his voice sounds suprisingly concerned.

"Yeah." I tell him with a shrug, "Feeling a bit off is all."

Maybe I'm sick? It might explain my peculiar behavior.

"Oh..."

********************


"What's your problem?" Tess asks harshly as she corners me at my locker, her eyes burning holes in my head. I don't know what to tell her but I'm pretty sure she can tell that I'm ignoring her. This whole day I've been avoiding her but I don't know what to say to her, that I'm jealous? That it sucks that Max may or may not have come to my balcony and even if he did and it wasn't in my head it couldn't have meant anything because he hasn't mentioned it so it's just as bad as my having imagined it.

"Nothing." I lie and try to get past her. She shoves me back against the locker and I wonder if she's going to hit me, she seems really pissed off and I've never really seen her this way, at least not towards me.

"Whatever, don't lie to me." She's really angry, I can tell by the tone of her voice and the look on her face, people are already stopping to stare and it's pretty sad.

"I'm not."

"There's something wrong. I can tell, it's not normal for you to be avoiding me and everyones saying you're acting weird."

"I am not." I protest and it sounds lame even to me.

"Yeah right. Just tell me what the fuck is your problem and then you can be on your way."

"You really want to know." I snap annoyed with her pushy attitude.

"Duh." She glares at me and my anger grows.

"You are my problem. Okay? Does that make you happy?" I push her and head off in the opposite direction, I know I'm overreacting but she kept pushing.

[baby_bre]

Chapter 8


FlirtaliciousxTess I'm bored!
RoswellsxAngelxLiz Cool.
ShakexItxLikexMe ???
RoswellsxAngelxLiz Nothing.
FlirtaliciousxTess So I see your mood hasn't changed much in much in the last hour.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz No it hasn't.
ShakexItxLikexMe What's going on with you two?!
FlirtaliciousxTess Liz has just decided to try and steal Isabel's crown for being the biggest bitch at Roswell High.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz Whatever Tess.
ShakexItxLikexMe You guys really need to stop fighting, it isn't good for you!
FlirtaliciousxTess We will when Liz stops being a prissy little baby.
ShakexItxLikexMe Tess!
RoswellsxAngelxLiz Don't call me a baby, you're the baby and the bitch!
ShakexItxLikexMe Would you guys just quit it? Theres no guy worth being like this over.
FlirtaliciousxTess Hmm I should have known Liz was being a bitch because of Max. She's always like that when he's invovled.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz What? This is NOT because of Max so shut up.
ShakexItxLikexMe It is over Max Liz and you know it!
FlirtaliciousxTess I should have realized that too....
ShakexItxLikexMe Yeah you should have but you didn't, so what can ya do? lol.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz Seriously though this has nothing to do wiith him.
ShakexItxLikexMe It has everything to do with him.
FlirtaliciousxTess Maria's right, you never acted this way until he came back and yeah I'm sorry that it's affecting you but I'm not going to stop being his friend just because of that.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz I never asked you to. and besides that I couldn't care less if you married him so just get over yourself already.
ShakexItxLikexMe Lizzie! Don't say things like that, Tess isn't interested in him are you Tessy?
FlirtaliciousxTess No... I'm not but if I were it wouldn't be any of her business.
ShakexItxLikexMe That's not nice... see what Max is doing to you! He's not worth fighting over, trust me I love the boy but I KNOW him so take it from me he's not worth it.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz Why do you say that?
ShakexItxLikexMe As much as I love Kyle let's just say he's a clone.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz Oh....
ShakexItxLikexMe Yeah but don't worry he's completely friend worthy but not hate your sister forever worthy.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz Whatever... I gotta go.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz has signed off


*********************************

That coversation when even worse then I imagined it would, I didn't know Max was a player or that Tess would rather hurt me then stop her little cozy love fest with Max. It's good to learn these things, it goes to show that there's really no one you can trust. I never thought Tess would be like that but now that I think of it I do remember her telling me when I asked if she'd go out with Max back in the day that she didn't know him well enough, she never mentioned the bit I was hoping for 'Of course I wouldn't, you know I'd never do that to you!' I just thought it slipped her mind but apparently not but from the looks of things they're going to be getting to know each other well pretty soon, considering according to my source Tess and Max have a lot of dates set up, why is this happening to me?

I know what I need to do and that's get over him, I don't care how hard it's going to be I am going to get over him, I don't care what I have to do. Maybe I'll even get a boyfriend to help myself forget all about him, it could seriously work.


*******************************

"Alex.... wait up!" I practically scream and run off in the direction he's going.

"Whats up?" He asks when I finally reach him, I'm out of breath but oh well it was worth it.

"Do you know if Kristen is still going out with Ruby's ex?"

"Bryan?" He asks looking confused, "Or Joseph? Or Aiden?"

"Bryan." I say wondering how many of Rubys exes Kristen has went out with.

"No, girl they broke up like ages okay."

"Really? I thought Heather said...."

He cuts me off with, "Never listen to anything Heather says, okay? She's such a fucking liar."

Alex really must not like Heather because seriously he never curses, like never ever. I haven't heard him curse since Isabel cheated on him and even then he felt bad, it makes me wonder what Heather did to get on the sweetest guy at Roswell's bad side, it must have been something big I know that much.

"What happened between you and Heather?" Sue me, so I'm not very good with being curious and not asking about it, there's worse things, I swear.

"You really don't know?"

"Know what?"

"That she tried to convince Isabel that I had cheated on her with her?" He answers looking shocked, like everyone in town should know that, I don't keep up with gossip usually unless Maria's ranting about it and besides that I've been too busy thinking of Max lately to pay attention to Maria's gossip rants.

"Errm no?"

"Sometimes you really are clueless." Whatever I am not! I'm completely on top of things.

"So Bryan's not seeing anyone?" I ask turning the attention back to my wonderful plan. Who better to use then Bryan? Captain of practically everything, straight A student and well his body is soooooo yummy, I swear you could wash your laundry on his abs.

"Not that I know of," He tells me, "Why?" Bryan is also one of the few guys that go here that never made fun of me when I was chubby. He was a good friend of mine way back when I was chubby and stood up for me numerouos occasions which always made me feel embarrassed but at the sametime I was thankful because when he was around nobody made fun of me, they knew better.

"I'm going to ask him out." I say just as Tess, Maria and Max turn the corner, when they spot me they give each other these looks and I wonder what their problem is, I can stand here talking with Alex if I want. None of us have really gotten on since our little AIM chat but whatever I'm not apologizing, I mean Tess did call me a bitch!

"You are?" He looks suprised which makes me wonder if people really think I'm a loser or if he's just suprised because he thinks I should still be at home obsessed over Max every friday and saturday night.

"Yep, I am. Don't look so shocked." I stick my tongue out and he laughs.

"I know he'll say yes, that boy really cares about you."

"Caring about someone is totally different then liking them." I remind him but I'm also pretty sure Bryan will say yes if for no other reason then he values our friendship too much to say no.

"Yeah maybe but whatever he'll say yes." He assures me and tells me where Bryan's at, how he knows I have no clue.

********************

"Hey Gangsta." He says as I approach, I'm feeling pretty nervous but Bryan looks cute as usual, he's got these amazing green eyes, his hair is black and spiky, it's really hot and his skin is lightly tanned, overall the boy is hot. Plus it doesn't hurt that he dresses really well and everyone loves him. I knew he'd be the perfect canadiate for getting me over Max, not that I'm using him or at least I hope I'm not because that'd be really mean but it is for a good cause and everything.

"What's up?"

"Nothing..." He smiles and I wonder why I have to be the one to ask, maybe I should have told Alex to but then I'll seem weird and that would be awkward and yeah.

"So... errm what are you doing on Friday?"

"Probably nothing, you?"

"Same..." I shrug and looking around the quad, hoping for some tension release.

"Sucks huh?"

"Yep..... so that's why I was wondering if you err wanted to like go hang out or something?"

"Hang out? Or go out on Friday?" He answers and I wonder what the difference is.

"Is there a difference?"

"Yeah, if you want to go out then it's like a date and if you just want to hang out then it's friends or whatever."

His logic makes sense to me I suppose, "Um... go out?"

"Really?" What's with everyone looking so suprised today?

"Yeah... for reals."

[baby_bre]

Sorry about the wait!

Chapter Nine



He said yes, I can't quite believe it! Okay as usual Alex was right, so here I am sitting on the living room sofa waiting and feeling more nervous then I've felt in day. It seriously sucks. I'm really hoping for this date to go well, even though there's that small bad part of me who is using Bryan it's not as bad as it sounds. I am using him but it's for a good cause, I'm trying to get over Max and Bryan happens to be the perfect canadiate.

My news has done it's job, it got Tess's mouth to hang open, Maria to start laughing and well I'm not entirely sure what Max's reaction was when Alex told them but I bet he was suprised. Depsite any reasons I have for doing this I am excited. Bryan is an awesome friend and maybe I don't feel anything for him beyond that but I'm positive it's only a matter of time before I grow deep feelings for him and forget all about whatever his name is or at least that's what I'm hoping will be happening.

"Busy bug what time is your date getting here?" Ever since Maria told my mom that I'm going out on a date she's been bothering me, it's almost as if she thinks I didn't like guys.

"He should be here anytime mom."

"Are you sure he's going to turn up."

I give her a look that says 'thanks a lot' and shrug, "I'm sure he will..." I assure her just as the doorbell rings, my mom jumps and I give her an odd look, what is with her?

"Shall I get it?"

"If you want." I could get it but I guess she wants to because the next thing I know she's practically raced across the room to the front door.

"Hello Bryan, come in."

"Thanks Mrs. Parker." I hear his voice and my stomach does a little flip, it's not like with Max, I feel nervous for other reasons and that's whats weird.

"Lizzy look whos here." She says moving out of the way so that Bryan is visable, he's dressed casually in slacks and a baby blue t-shirt but I must say it looks good on him.

I pull a face at Bryan, my mom can be a bit of a drag sometimes, I knew it was Bryan so why is she acting like it's a suprise that he's here.. on time?

"Want to get going?" He suggests after a few moments of silence.

"Umm, yeah sure.."

****************

I can do this!! I know I can do this, I just have to believe that I can and then I can! Right? It should be that simple shouldn't it? I can't believe how many flutters are in my stomach, I feel sick. Why here? Why did we have to come here? Tess, Max, Maria and Michael are all seated at a table to our far left. The place is so crowded that I'm not sure they've noticed us come in but that doesn't change anything, I still feel cold, sick and crazy nervous.

"You okay?" Bryan asks, his face scanning mine with concerned eyes.

"I'm good." I reply immediantly feeling bad because he's been a gentlemen this whole evening, he's been charming, funny, caring and I've been acting like I don't want to be there. Why did I think this was a good idea? Spending time with him just because we're friends is one thing and dating is a whole other thing.

"So...." He starts.

"Umm, have you talked to Ruby recently?" I ask grasping for something to talk to him about. So maybe Ruby, his ex isn't the best topic but it's something I'm interested in. I don't know Ruby, not that anyone really knows her. We know things about her, like that she's really gorgoues, has dated half the senior class, gets good grades and seem to have lots of money and no job. But we don't actually know her, she's a mystery to me.

"The other day." He says shrugging, an expression passes in his eyes but I can't quite place it.

"Interesting," I start lamely, "Must be weird seeing your ex around the halls all the time." God could I be anymore of an idiot? Since when did I become such a dumbass??

"I suppose so. Though Ruby is practically every guys ex so I'd think we all got used to it." He chuckles good naturedly, "Besides that I don't consider her my ex, I still consider her a close friend." Damn, I wonder if everyone whos dated Ruby has thought of her that way, I've been told by some of her other "exes" that they can't help but still care about her. It makes a girl curious as to what she's got that so special about her.

"I got to pee." I break through the momentary silence, feeling my cheeks flush but its the truth, I do have to pee! it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I feel completely dumb and at loss for words.

**********************

"Liz." Tess's curt voice breaks through my thoughts, when did she come into the bathroom?

"Hey Tess." I reply keeping a friendly tone to my voice as I continue cheeking my apperance in the huge mirror.

"Having fun on your date?" She asks raising an eyebrow in my direction.

"Yeah, Bryan's really... great." I plaster a smile on my face and continue happily, "He's really smart, I could listen to him talk for hours." I press on.

"Oh? Well that's really ... great." I feel like we're strangers, like we don't know each other anymore which is crazy because Tess has been like a sister to me forever and now here we are behaving like strangers.

"Yeah. It is. But enough about me, how is yours and Maria's dates going?" I'm being polite and forcing the cheerfulness into my voice is just about killing me.

"Dates?" She gives me an odd look but shrugs, "Fine I suppose."

So they are on a date?! I knew it when I saw them! But.. I don't care. I mean what does it have to do with me? Nothing, I could careless about Max and Tess's date.

"I better get back to my date."

****************

"Maria." I'm confused when I approach our table, why is Maria sitting in my seat?

"Hey Liz." She says smiling at me.

"Oh awesome." I nod and wait for her to leave, doesn't she have her own date to attend to?

"Yeah I was just telling Bryan how fun it'd be if we all sat together, don't you think it would be fun?"

"I don't..."

"I'm sure we would love to join you guys." Bryan says not realizing he's just cut me off and he turns to see if I'm going to agree with him, I'm not about to say no so I smile brightly and nod.

"Great." She says and heads off to tell everyone..

*****************

The night was a complete disaster, I cannot believe how awkward I felt crammed in between Maria and Bryan. I had to watch Tess and Max flirt. What is the deal with those two? Just friends? Yeah right, that's the biggest lie I've ever heard. Tess thinks I'm stupid doesn't she? I pretended everything was just peachy, I smiled, laughed and ate along with everyone else but inside everytime Tess touched Max's hair or he smiled at her in that special way a little piece of me felt like it was dying.

FlirtaliciousxTess: Morning Maria!!!
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Maybe for you.
FlirtaliciousxTess: What bit you in the ass?
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: I've got a headache, is that okay with you?
FlirtaliciousxTess: No, not really.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Whatever Tess. I'm not in the mood.
FlirtaliciousxTess: So is this how it's going to be from now on?
FlirtaliciousxTess: Huh? Are you just going to act like I'm dirt?
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Dramatic much?
FlirtaliciousxTess: Only when you're being a self absorbed bitch.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: I'm not a self absorbed.
FlirtaliciousxTess: Yes you are! The whole wide world has to revolve around you and when it doesn't you get mad and act like I've commited murder.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: You're really one to talk right?
FlirtaliciousxTess: I'm not selfish.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: You're the one who knew how I felt about Max and yet you're still going after him aren't you?
FlirtaliciousxTess: I am not! You don't know what you're saying.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Yeah right like I'm going to believe that after all the flirting from last night?
FlirtaliciousxTess: I don't care what you believe so long as you stop making accusations.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: I don't know why I ever thought you were such a good friend.
FlirtaliciousxTess: Because I am!
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: No you're not. Good friends wouldn't do what you did.
FlirtaliciousxTess: I didn't do anything!
FlirtaliciousxTess: And besides you're the one going on a date with Bryan.
FlirtaliciousxTess: Right?
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: You didn't waste anytime before grabbing Max up though did you?
FlirtaliciousxTess: For someone who supposidely doesn't like Max anymore you're sure up tight about him huh?
FlirtaliciousxTess: Wait.. Liz I'm sorry.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: I don't care. Bye.
FlirtaliciousxTess: ... Bye.
RoswellsXAngelXLiz has signed off

I sit back in my computer chair and sigh. That conversation went from okay to really bad. Why did I let my jealousy get the best of me? I can't believe I spoke to Tess like that, I never speak to anyone like that! But she called me a self absorbed bitch, I'm not am I? I mean yeah I'm being a little unreasonable about this whole situation but given the circumstances and my feelings for Max don't I have the right to be? Tess is the one who doesn't like him but all of the sudden she's practically throwing herself at him, so I just don't get it. What is the deal with them?

[baby_bre]

Part Ten


I haven’t spoken to my dear friends in days, none of them. I know a little rude of me right? I doubt it, I mean if Tess weren’t being like this, stabbing me in the back that is then I would be friends with them. I can’t sit around and pretend that I’m happy when I see them holding hands in the halls or kissing in the phone booth. How could she? First off she lied to me, told me they were just friends and that turned out to be untrue and then she said she cared about me. Lies, all lies and the thing that hurts the worst is that Maria seems to be supporting their relationship.

How could she? I hate them, honestly I do. Alright so maybe I don’t hate them but I certainly don’t like them at the moment. I keep trying to convince myself that it doesn’t matter, that I should be happy for Tess but how can I be? If you were me you’d be unhappy too if your supposed “best” friend and nearly sister were being like this to you! I’m sure then you’d be able to relate instead of leaving nasty comments on my LJ about how I should chill and give up on Max and get over myself, it’s just not that easy.

************


Don’t Cha Wish: Liz?

My eyes blink up to the screen when I hear the familiar IM sound, my first thought is its Maria or Tess but luckily it isn’t. The problem is I don’t know who this person is. They’ve never IMed me before but they must know me because they said Liz.

RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Err yeah?
Don’t Cha Wish: What’s up?
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Nothing. Who is this?
Don’t Cha Wish: You get straight to the point don’t you? This is Ruby.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz : Ruby? Oh, hi!

I am such a dork but I can not believe Ruby is IMing me, she has never IMed me, she’s never even said hi to me before and as far as I know she didn’t even know my name.

Don’t Cha Wish: Hi. So, what are you up to?
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Nothing much, sitting around. You?
Don’t Cha Wish: Same mostly. I was just IMing you to ask if it’s true you went out with Bryan the other night?
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Yeah that’s true. Why?
Don’t Cha Wish: I was just wondering if you liked him.

This is weird, Ruby never interrogates people or at least I never heard of her doing that before.

RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Does it matter?
Don’t Cha Wish: Not really no. I’m just asking because Bryan’s my friend.

Would it be really rude to tell her to go away and leave me alone? That’s it’s none of her business if I like Bryan or am using him for his body?

RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Oh, well I like him. Although I didn’t think you guys were friends, I mean the way he talks about you I’d say he was your enemy.

So I’m a bitch and I just lied to Ruby but I don’t really care. She shouldn’t have stuck her nose in especially when I’m convinced it’s not really her nose and besides that she really ought to leave me alone because she can have any guy at school she wants so why doesn’t she go toss herself into that happy thought?

Don’t Cha Wish: Hun, take a chill pill. I’m not trying to rid you about this.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz]: Yeah sorry. I’m just a little …. Upset.
Don’t Cha Wish: Anything I can help with?
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Not unless you have magical powers that can stop two of my friends from going out.
Don’t Cha Wish: Ha if I had that power I’d have used it already.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Really? On who?

Does Ruby still like Bryan? It’s kind of obvious! She does doesn’t she? And now she probably hates me!

Don’t Cha Wish: Nobody you know. What about you? Who do you want to break up at Roswell High?

It’s a cover up isn’t it? I know she’s just trying pretend she isn’t madly in love with him. She’s probably sitting there stuffing her face and cursing me. Or maybe I’ve watched too many movies?

RoswellxAngelxLiz: Oh. Okay. Well you know, umm you know Tess?
Don’t Cha Wish: Kind of.

I’m almost certain after I tell her she’s going to think I’m a total witch.

RoswellsxAngelxLiz: I like her boyfriend.

Why did I just put that? I cannot believe I told a nearly perfect stranger that I like Max! It’s just Ruby’s so easy to talk to, people were right she makes it seem like you could tell her practically anything.

Don’t Cha Wish: You do??? Isn’t Tess like your sister though?
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Yeah. How’d you know that?
Don’t Cha Wish: You’d be surprised by the things I know.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: I bet but really you shouldn’t think I’m this backstabbing pretend friend. To be honest if anyone is a back stabber it’s Tess. I’ve liked Max for a loooong time and she knows it.
Don’t Cha Wish: That’s awful, I can’t believe how messed up girls can be.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Yeah I just never thought Tess would do that to me, I know I wasn’t like clinging to Max and announcing I was in love with him but still, it’s not right.
Don’t Cha Wish: Definitely not right.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: So… I feel a little weird now.
Don’t Cha Wish: It’s okay, trust me, I can keep a secret.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Good thing cause if Max ever found out I’m in love with him I’d die of embarrassment.
Don’t Cha Wish: No worries chica my lips are sealed.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Now that I’ve poured my secrets out do you think I could ask who you like?
Don’t Cha Wish: Can you keep a secret Liz?
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Yeah I’m really good at keeping secrets.

Except my own! What am I on? I can’t believe I just said that to her, the most popular girl in school and I’m sitting here pouring my heart out like we’ve been best friends for years.

Don’t Cha Wish: It’s Bryan.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Seriously?

I so knew that.

Don’t Cha Wish: Yeah. I’ve been in love with him for the longest time.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: So then why aren’t you with him?
Don’t Cha Wish: I don’t know, I guess I’m scared.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: You? Scared? Of what? You’re like the most wanted girl in school, how can you be scared?
Don’t Cha Wish: hahaha even popular girls get scared. I don’t like committing. I didn’t want to get hurt you know?

Actually I don’t know, come to think of it I’ve never been scared of being in a relationship with Max. Though I’ve never been in one with him either so maybe it would have been different had I been in one?

RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Kind of?
Don’t Cha Wish: I don’t know how to explain it. I’m scared that as soon as he realizes I’m not perfect, I’m not the picture of perfection all the people in school seem to think I am that he’s not going to want to be with me.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Oh… I’m sorry.
Don’t Cha Wish: It’s not your fault, it’s something I’m dealing with and besides I doubt after Ryan, Jackson, Nate, Marcus and Doug that Bryan would ever take me back. He’s too good to be with someone who goes through guys like people go through socks.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Bryan’s awesome and I was lying. He doesn’t think badly of you so maybe theres a chance.
Don’t Cha Wish: Even if there was you know I can’t… oh shoot I have to go.
RoswellsxAngelxLiz: Okay..
Don’t Cha Wish: See you at school tomorrow.
Don’t Cha Wish has signed off

I sit back in my chair; I still can’t believe that this has just happened. I’ve just spilled my only secret to Ruby.

**************

“Maria?” I say into my cell while I walk towards the front of the school. “What’s wrong?” I got this really disturbing message from her like ten minutes ago. She was going on and on about my not coming to school, how something had happened and I should just ditch. Then she called and left another message saying it was nothing to worry about but that we should go hang out at the park. So something is definitely going on, Maria knows I don’t skip.

“Nothing. Where are you? The park? I’ll meet you there.” She rambles and Maria only ever rambles when she’s nervous.

“What’s going on?” I demand stopping near the entrance to lean against the wall.

“Nothing.. absolutely nothing. Where are you?” She asks again and I roll my eyes.

“I’m at the entrance.”

”Wait there.”

Literally two seconds later I see Maria scrambling through the door out of breath. “Lets go.”

“Go where?”

”Anywhere but here.” She shoots back and heads for the parkinglot.

“Stop Ria.” I have to know what’s going on there is something off. People keep staring at us, some are even laughing. “I am not going anywhere until you tell me what’s going on.”

“Okay but not here, in my car okay?” She says and practically drags me into the seat next to her before she shoves a paper into my hands.

I hold the paper up so I can read it right; it’s not seriously what I think it is. “This is my chat log with Ruby. Where did you get it?”

“Umm. Liz? I don’t know how to say this but they were pasted all over the walls at school when I got there. I took down as many as I could but…”

My heart sinks and I don’t know what to say, this can’t be happening! How could this happen? Who would do this? How did they get a hold of our chat log? It couldn’t have been Ruby; the part about Bryan is here so she wouldn’t have done this would she have?

“Has Max seen it?” That’s the only question I ask before I start to cry.