Drowning in the Wishing Well (CC,M/L,TEEN) [COMPLETE]

[roswellianprincess16]

Title: Drowning in the Wishing Well

Rating: TEEN

Disclamer: I don’t own anything. Roswell belongs to UPN and the WB.

Summary: Based on a challenge by RedAthena.

MAX: I wish I could go back Liz. Back to when things were normal.

LIZ: Me, too. I just wish that I could have stopped you from saving my life that day in the CrashDown.
* * * * *

Be careful what you wish for. Liz gets a sideline view of life without her. Is it so wonderful a life in which Max, still an alien, was prevented from saving her life that day at the Crashdown? No longer Liz-the-Soulmate/Secret-Keeper she is instead a newspaper headline: "Teenager Dies in Cafe Dispute Turned Violent"

Explore the characters left behind in the wake of this tragedy. How will Max react to losing the focus of his fantasies of normality? Michael has prevented a public and ultimately catastrophic display of power. How's he feeling? And with no previous experience in this level of 'excitement' how well will Maria react to the death of a friend? Etc.

Liz can either be an viewer with no way to affect the events playing out before her or she can interact but be trapped in a form unrecognizable to her friends and family.

Author's Note: There will be two scenes where dialogue is taken directly from the show because those scenes are directly used. The Prologue and the beginning of Chapter 1. Please don't try and sue me for plagiarism. I'm just borrowing them for now.

Disclaimer: Don't own Roswell, etc etc.



PROLOGUE:

She was stepping on the gas as hard as she could. Her foot was beginning to feel numb, her leg throbbing from the pressure. She turned her head to the side for a moment to look at his face. He was shivering. She placed her arm around his shoulders for a moment and then looked back anxiously to see how far they’d gone. He placed a t-shirt on over his head and she wrapped her palms tightly on the steering wheel, her heart pounding loudly in her ears.

“Max, what did they do to you?” But her stomach churning told her she didn’t really want to know. She was terrified of the answer.

“It’s over.” His voice was weak. She could barely hear his words. All she heard was the sound of the car and the terrified voice screaming in her head. It would never be over. “Listen Liz, if we ever get out of this….”

That’s when the deafening sound hits the back window and the shattering of glass causes her to scream. They’d shot at them. They were willing to kill them. And that’s when it all became too real.

“Let’s go. Let’s go. Come here.” She ordered as if she were in full control. Her only concern was him. He’d risked his life… exposed himself and his only real family to save hers. She wouldn’t let him down now. She couldn’t.

They ran through the trees, the darkness surrounding them. It was as if the moon weren’t out. There was no light to guide them in any particular direction. Just darkness… and fear. A cold, chilling fear that seeped through her veins. She wouldn’t let them take him. Not if she had any air left in her body.

“Go.” She heard him whisper weakly. She grabbed his hand and pulled him along with her. She was going and he was coming with her.

“Come on. Come on Max.”

“Go. Go!” They ran out into the street and that’s when she saw them. The bright, blinding white lights in front of them. They’d found them. They weren’t going to leave there alive. She looked around frantically. None of this was real. It couldn’t be.

The agents were surrounding them. There was nowhere left to run.

“Come on.” She whispered. A sad realization in her voice. She ran to the only haven she could see.

The edge of the rail stood invitingly as she helped Max climb on. She held his hand tightly and kissed his lips for what she feared would be the last time. Then she closed her eyes and jumped.

***
She felt the cold water seep through her clothes. She searched desperately in the dark.

“Max!” She whispered loudly before hearing a small sound.

“I’m here.” He whispered softly and reached again for her hand.

“We have to run.” She began running toward the edge of the water where a large metal opening stood. They ran, their feet clunking loudly against the metal. They needed to move… fast.

They came upon an old abandoned yard. She looked around desperately for shelter. He needed to rest. He wasn’t going to make it the rest of the night.

“We’ve got to hide. Come on in here Max. Come on. In here.” She took his hand and led him into an old overturned truck. He sat down, taking a deep breath. She looked him over. He was still shivering and now he was wet. “I think we’ll be safe in here for a while. They don’t know how far down the river we got. Max.”

She reached for him and kissed him. Her fear and her heartbreak were all in that kiss. She was afraid she’d never see him again and it would have all been her fault. What they did to him in that room… it was unimaginable. She felt the rush of flashes as she felt his fear, his pain, and his defeat. He never once gave them in. Because he loved them. He loved her. She pulled away and looked at his face, her eyes wide with fear. My God… he’d never be the same.

“Max.” She whispered, her voice caught in her throat. Would he ever forgive her for the mess that they were in? Would he ever have a chance to?

They sat in silence as she tried to warm him. His shivering stopped slightly and she stood up, the events of the past few hours beating on her. She felt like a trapped animal. No place to run. No place to hide. She wanted to scream and still she knew the repercussions of doing so were deadly. She turned to look at Max, still sitting looking like a lost child.

“So everything Nasedo told me was true. You and Tess were meant to be together.”

Granted, she realized her timing was awful. Then again, they might not live past tonight and she felt she should at least have all the facts.

“Liz.” She hated the way he said her name. The finality of it. The weight of everything bore down on her and she felt herself ready to explode. She wouldn’t be able to stay sane much longer. This was perhaps the most terrifying day of her life.

“I mean it’s your destiny, right?”

And somewhere deep inside she believed it. She believed it because she knew that it was knowing her that had led to this moment. Loving her that had moved him to risk it all.

“I wish I could go back Liz. Back to when things were normal.” She stared at him for a moment, taking in his words. Back to that day in September. Back to a life in shadows. Where he was safe. And Isabel and Michael too.

“Me too. I just wish I could’ve stopped you from saving my life that day in the CrashDown.” She looked down, the weight of it all sinking in her heart.

“Don’t say that.”

“Max, the day you saved my life, your life just ended.” She didn’t want to think of what those words really meant. It meant that they were never meant to be. That she should never have felt the touch of his lips on hers. The feel of his magical hand on her skin. The visions of flying through space. None of it belonged to her.

“No, that was the day my life began. Liz, when I was in that room and they did what they did to me… you’re what kept me alive. The thought of you. The way your eyes look into mine. Your smile. The touch of your skin. Your lips. Knowing you has made me… human. Whether I die tomorrow or fifty years from now my destiny is the same: it’s you. I wanna be with you Liz. I love you.” She tasted the salt of her tears as she took in his words. It was the first time he’d said those magical words to her. And yet… she’d known it all along.

“I love you too.” She whispered sadly as she kissed him. If she were to die that very night, it wouldn’t be in vain. She knew that she loved this man too much to allow anyone to hurt him ever. If she had the power to go back, she would. Maybe then Max Evans would have had a chance at life. A real life. A life where he didn’t have to constantly look behind his shoulder. Where maybe someone, somewhere could have been good and safe for him. She let her tears fall as she felt his hands on her face. The thought of someone else kissing him broke her.

He deserved that. A chance at enjoying the pleasures of life. Without this dreadful memory. She’d been nothing but bad luck on all of them… ever since the day he risked his life for hers. Well, his life was in her hands now. She wouldn’t let him die. If she could only give him that one thing. A life without Liz Parker.

[roswellianprincess16]

A/N: Hello everyone! Thanks for stopping in. As you all probably know... the angst level is about to go up. It's too bad Liz is so convinced that life would be so much better. Is it such a wonderful life? Well, let's see what happens next.

Chapter 1:

She opened her eyes as she heard the loud hustle and bustle of a crowd. Had she fallen asleep? She felt odd, a feeling of urgency slowly fading within her. She felt tired, as if she’d been running. She looked around groggily at the familiar faces. She recognized where she was, but for some reason she felt as though it were not possible that she were there. She was supposed to be somewhere. With someone. And it was important. But she couldn’t remember where or with who? It was a very frustrating feeling.

She looked around the now half empty classroom as she picked up her books. Why did she feel so lightheaded? She headed toward her locker and froze. There stood Maria DeLuca and Alex Whitman. And another very familiar face. A small brunette with blue jeans and a red top. She looked down at her feet and saw some white sneakers and a pair of dark blue jeans covering her legs. She reached up to touch her face, her eyes, her nose, her mouth. She looked around frantically for a bathroom. She headed in the general direction, her hand never leaving her cheek. She walked in, thankful for the emptiness and stood in front of the mirror. A pair of bright blue eyes stared back.

“This isn’t right. This… this isn’t right.” She looked at her face, tracing the lines with her fingers. Her high cheek bones, her small nose, her spread of freckles on her cheeks. She reached up to touch the medium length curls of thick flame red hair. Her breathing was becoming uneven. What was happening? What day was it?

She threw the backpack off her shoulders and ripped it open for a sign, a clue, anything to give her some sort of hint. She pulled out a piece of paper. It was a graded Biology test. The grade was B+; the topic: anatomy of a shark; the date: September 16th 1999.

It had to be an old test. A VERY old test. She reached back into the bag and pulled out a notebook. She flipped through the pages of unfamiliar writing. Once she got to the blank ones she turned back. She read over some of the notes. She had sat through that class. She knew what those notes were about. She swallowed loudly before turning back the page. The date sat still on the right hand corner of the page. Messy and dark. September 18th 1999. The name on the sheet: Serena Mitchell.

None of it made sense. She looked in the mirror again, her sky blue eyes shining, her pretty lips glossed to perfection. She knew who she was. She was not Serena Mitchell. There had never BEEN a Serena Mitchell. Until now. She looked down at her wrist and caught the time. 2:00 PM. She had exactly half an hour. Today was the day Liz Parker would get shot.

***

She reached the CrashDown doors and froze. The scene was set. What was she supposed to do? Stop it? Let it go? Why did she know about it? How did she get there? There were so many questions and no one to answer them. She suddenly felt very alone, very… alienated. She stood at the door for a few moments, people coming in and out to her left through the other door. She looked in and her eyes drifted to the dark hair. He was sitting there with Michael. She watched as his head came up every few minutes to look at her. She turned her gaze to the brunette in her alien uniform and white tennis shoes. She looked absolutely ridiculous. Why hadn’t anyone told her that? She looked at Maria and how they spoke and for a moment, she envied them.

“You used to be my friend… remember?” She whispered before she lowered her head sadly. She would not be able to understand what was happening unless she let things play out. For now… she was just Serena.

She walked in and took a seat in the booth behind the two burly men. She knew they would be the ones. Perhaps it would never happen. Perhaps she would be starting a whole new life as a different person. Perhaps… well, who knew? Anything could happen.

She took a deep breath and looked down at the table. Well, as long as she was there, she might as well take down some notes. She pulled out her notebook and turned to a blank page. She mapped out the CrashDown and where everyone was sitting, including herself. Was adding a new person to the scene going to somehow change the outcome?

She looked around through the top of her eyes at the people, afraid they’d see through her. Larry and Jen sat at their seat, ridiculously goofy smiles on their faces. Maria walked around the café, serving and pleasing. Michael sat with Max. It was all the same. Except for her.

“Okay, I have got one Sigourney Weaver, that's for you. And one Will Smith. Can I get you guys anything else? Green Martian Shake? Blood of Alien smoothie??”

She watched her with marvel. She could finally say she really had an out-of-body experience. And it was incredibly weird.

“No thanks, we’re good.”

“Are you guys here for the Crash Festival?’ She watched, knowing every act, every move, every word. Maybe that’s what being psychic was like. She tried controlling her thoughts, but with every second she was feeling less and less like herself. It was as if someone else were settling, thinking their thoughts and hers at the same time.

“Are you being helped?” She snapped out of her thoughts and looked up stunned, to see the familiar smile of a beautiful blonde.

“Umm, no I’m not.” She looked at her as she reached into her uniform to pull out a pen and pad and looked back up to meet her eyes.

“You’re the new girl right? My name’s Maria.”

“Uh, hi. Serena.” She looked down at her notebook and suddenly felt her ears go red. She looked back over at Maria, her bright happy eyes smiling. Little did she know that this day would change her life.

“Well, what’ll it be?”

“Umm… I’ll just have a Green Martian shake for now. Please.” She watched as the hand scribbled something fast and she smiled.

“No problemo. Be back in a jiffy.” As Maria turned to walk away she headed straight for Liz. And then it began. She rattled off the conversation in her head. She watched as Liz looked over at Max and he lowered his head shyly. She could hear the men in front of her getting louder. Her head was spinning with possibilities. If she knew the future, was it her place to change it? Did she want to? Wasn’t this what she’d always really wanted? To spare Max and Michael and Isabel the agony of being discovered?

She felt the world spiraling out of control. She had to do something. This wasn’t the way it was supposed to be. Yet she sat frozen. She had never felt so helpless in her life. Except once…. A vague memory of a dark night and the edge of a bridge flashed before her. The thought of cold water. The fear.

Before she could react, the men were up, their arms flaring wildly in the air. The place seemed to pause as everyone looked back at them. The sound of plates crashing onto the floor was deafening. Then the man with the hat pulled out the gun. Then there was the shot.

“LIZ!” The scream.

She looked over and caught her eyes for a moment, her big brown depths terrified and confused. She watched her fall to the ground as her breath caught in her chest. She could remember the feeling of pure pain. She reached down to grab her stomach and was afraid it was actually bleeding. It wasn’t. She looked up horrified to see Michael grabbing a desperate Max.

“What are you doing? Let go of me.”

“Max, what are you going to do?” They exchanged desperate glances and with one strong tug, Michael pushed him back.

“I can’t let her die.” She watched his lips carefully as he whispered, frantic and panicked.

“There’s nothing you can do.” They both turned to look at Liz as she lay sprawled on the floor, motionless.

“Someone call an ambulance!” She froze, the sound of her own voice, still unfamiliar. Maria ran toward a phone and she met his eyes for a moment. Sad, desperate, beautiful eyes. She wiped away the tears she didn’t know she’d been crying and forced herself to look away. She didn’t want to see that pain on his face. He would forget. He would soon forget how much he loved her. She suddenly stopped; an awful silence within her. The struggle had ended. There were no longer two voices battling in her head. Just one. She looked over at the body on the floor. There was no doubting what had just happened. Liz Parker had just died.

[roswellianprincess16]

A/N: Seems I've raised a few questions in your minds huh? Well, trust me... they will be answered soon! But for now... here's the new chapter!

Chapter 2:

She sat frozen inside the café as everyone was interrogated. She had just technically died. And yet… she was sitting right there, watching it all unfold. She looked around, the complete defeat on so many faces. How was she supposed to feel?

“Ma’am?” She looked up suddenly, not expecting the voice.

“Huh?”

“I know that this has been very difficult for you, but, I’d really like to ask you some questions.” She stared into the familiar blue eyes. The ones that once seemed so terrifying.

“Alright.” It was just a whisper, but it was the best she could do.

“What time did you get to the café?”

“About 2:15.”

“Where were you sitting?” She watched as he wrote everything down on his paper.

“Right over there… right behind them.” She turned to point and felt her throat get thick with tears. She wouldn’t cry. Despite the fact that she was lost and alone and terrified, she wouldn’t cry.

“Did you hear what they were arguing about?”

“Umm… no. I’m sorry. I just… it wasn’t supposed to be this way Sheriff. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.” She felt her body begin to shake as the tears began to fall involuntarily.

“I know… I know.” He pulled her in for a quick hug and she felt the comfort of a somewhat familiar person. Then the thoughts began to plague her. She didn’t know anyone. She didn’t have anywhere to go. She was… alone. He watched her face for a moment and she saw his eyes water a bit.

“What’s your name?”

“Serena… Mitchell.” She wiped her tears and tried to come up with a plan. Her brain wasn’t working. She wasn’t thinking logically. All she wanted to do was cry.

“Where do you live?” The question hit her like a ton of bricks. There was no answer. She let out a big sigh and felt the urge to cry again.

“I… I don’t.”

“You don’t what?” He asked, his attention now completely on her face.

“I… I’m staying at the Home.” She looked up and caught his sad eyes. There was a sympathy there, even a hint of pity.

“No parents?”

“No.”

“Will you be ok getting there by yourself?” She looked up suddenly, the concern in his voice touching her heart.

“Yes.” And that was that. She knew there’d be no questions. After all, she wasn’t a suspect. Now all she’d have to do is find a place to stay. Maybe scrounge up some money and stay at the little motel in town. Until she found a more permanent location. Permanent. She had no idea how long that would be.

***

The day quickly turned into night as the Roswell sky began to darken. She walked around aimlessly for hours, hoping to come up with some sort of plan. She had found nothing. She was exhausted, hungry, and cold. She looked around as the crowd of people at the park began to thin. It had been busy during the late afternoon, but now it was getting quiet and frankly, a bit scary.

She walked through the path passing endless rows of trees. She’d seen them all so many times before, and yet, she felt as though it was the first time. Ahead she saw a bench and headed to sit down. She looked around. Perhaps this was it… where she’d have to stay for the night.

A swift breeze drifted past her as she lay down, in fetal position, trying to fit her small body comfortably on the even smaller bench. She could not believe she was doing this. This was how women were raped and killed. This was how they disappeared never to be seen again. Even more terrifying was knowing that now… no one would even look for her.

She felt the urge to cry again, an incredibly childish reaction, since she knew crying would solve nothing. Then again, it didn’t seem she could solve anything either. She covered her eyes with her hands and let the tears flow, wanting to just die right there on the spot. She was sure that seeing her own death had traumatized her to no end.

She heard some footsteps and willed herself to be invisible. No one knew her, they wouldn’t even look her way. She stood still, the only sound coming from her were little sniffles as she tried to contain her runny nose.

“Hey… you ok?” She opened her eyes and peeked through the openings between her fingers.

Before her stood a tall, dark haired boy with bright blue eyes. She felt her heart sink into her stomach.

“Umm… yea.”

“You don’t look ok.” His eyes were red and he’d obviously been crying, but he was worried about her being ok. So typical.

“I’ve just… I’ve had a rough day.” She whispered and looked down sadly, no words really being able to express her mental state.

“Me too. You mind if I sit down?” He smiled weakly, probably for the first time that day.

She sat up and moved over making some room. She stared into his eyes, willing him, hoping that he would see inside.

“Were you at the CrashDown this afternoon?”

“Yea.”

“My best friend was shot and killed there.” He said it and then there was a silence. He looked over at her and she was still staring at him, a sort of amazement in her eyes.

“I know… umm… I’m sorry.”

“My name’s Alex. Alex Whitman. I sit behind you in Western Civ.”

“Right. Serena. Serena Mitchell.”

“I’m sorry that you were there this afternoon. Must not have been easy… to actually see it.” His voice lowered into a whisper as he trailed off the sentence. “It’s just not fair. She had so much going for her… she was gonna go to Harvard. Discover the cure for cancer or something.”

She felt her entire being crumble. God… she’d never known he loved her so much.

“Now she’ll never get to do that. And somehow, I feel if I were there… I might have been able to help in someway. To save her.”
“You can’t blame yourself Alex.”

“I know… but why not?”

“Because there’s nothing… nothing you could have done.” She then realized they were both crying, the agony of death bonding them, one to a stranger, the other to a life long friend.

“I didn’t even get to tell her how much I loved her.” He whispered and she reached over and held his hand.

“You know what? I think she knew.” She managed to say between tears.

“I hope so.” He smiled this time and looked over into her blue eyes. “I’m sorry I’m just throwing this all on you… I… I don’t even know what possessed me to stop. You just, you looked like you needed a friend.”

“I did.” She laughed slightly at the irony of his statement and then the loud roar of her stomach scared them both. “Oh… sorry.”

“You hungry?”

“A little bit.”

“Do you want to… maybe get a bite to eat?”

“Umm… I don’t really have any money…”

“My treat. I just… I don’t really like the idea of you sitting out here all alone tonight. Call me crazy but… well those guys might still be out here somewhere.”

“Ok.” She walked beside him, a comfortable silence embracing them as they walked out of the park and into the small city lights.

“You… there’s something so familiar about you. I’m sorry if I’m coming off to forward. I mean, who am I, you know? But, I figured you’re new around here. Maybe knowing some people is not a bad idea.”

“Well, it beats being alone. That’s for sure.” They walked into the small diner and she looked around. Maria had always called this place….

“The walking heart attack.”

“What?”

“My friend Maria… she’s sure that this place breeds walking cases of heart disease. I’m not quite sure I disagree.”

She smiled, maybe this was God’s way of helping her find peace. The waitress came by to take the drink orders and she recited her favorite dish.

“Can I just get two eggs scrambled with melted cheese and bacon with wheat bread and strawberry jam?” She looked across at Alex’s stunned expression. He stared at her, his blue eyes wide. “What?”

“Nothing.” He continued to look at her, an odd expression on his face. “Umm… I’ll have the pancakes… double stack please.” The waitress nodded and walked away as he turned to look at her again.

“This is really very sweet of you.” She smiled, trying to ease out of the coming questions.

“Where are you from Serena?” The technique didn’t work.

“Umm… Arizona.” She had to think on her feet. She wasn’t prepared for a Q&A.

“Why’d you move here?” She figured she’d stick to one story, that way, she didn’t have to go around making up countless lies.

“I’m in foster care. Umm… I was placed here.”

“Oh.” She watched as he recoiled a bit, taking in what that all meant.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I mean… I’m ok with it.” She looked up and smiled sadly, not sure she really believed that herself.

“It must be tough, being new and not having any family.”

“Well… guess that depends on your version of family.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve always thought that family was what you make it. Granted, your blood relatives… but… well, sometimes there are friends that are like family.” She looked down suddenly, hoping he wouldn’t inquire further. She’d gotten too personal.

“I know what you mean.” He swirled his napkin around aimlessly, a habit he’d developed that showed he was deep in thought.

“You know… I learned something today.” She looked up at him, their eyes meeting, her hands wanting to reach across to calm his.

“What’s that?”

“Life is too short to be taken for granted.”

“You’re right.”

“Everyone should have friends and family. Should know that they’re loved.”

“Yea… I guess that’s true.”

“What if I invited you to stay at my house?” She looked up suddenly, her eyes open wide in disbelief.

“What?”

“Look… don’t get me wrong. I’m not some pervert trying to hit on you or anything. But… I can’t bare the thought of you being alone… especially after what you’ve seen today. You need to talk to people. If only to keep you sane.”

“But Alex… you don’t even know me. For all you know I could be some crazy serial killer or a kleptomaniac that’s going to rob you blind! Don’t you know you can’t be that trusting with people you don’t know?” She stopped herself suddenly, a realization of her words falling upon her. She wanted to slap her mouth shut. This wasn’t going to work.

“Do you believe in reincarnation Serena?” She looked up into his questioning eyes and smiled. Just like Alex to ask that kind of question.

“I don’t know really.”

“It’s not something Liz would have ever believed in. She’s much too scientific for that. But Maria… well, she would buy into the theory that there are essences that live on in other people.”

“Yea?”

“Yea. And to be honest… you remind me so much of Liz. It’s almost like she didn’t leave me… like she’s right here. With you.”

She looked into his eyes and noticed something. There was a look there she’d seen before. It was a look of curiosity mixed with some sense of knowing. Perhaps he felt he’d figured something out. In a way… he was right.

“That really means a lot… seeing how much you loved her and all.”

“Maybe this is our chance to make things right.” He whispered and she looked up, unsure if she’d heard his words. “To make you the next one to find the cure for cancer.” He smiled then, a teasing glint in his eye. And the truth was, it was great to see him smiling.

“I doubt it. My last Biology test wasn’t exactly ‘change the world’ material.” She laughed, enjoying her time with him.

“Maybe I’ve just been sniffing too much of that Cyprus oil.”

“Or maybe you’re onto something. Maybe not everyone is who they seem.” She smiled and leaned back as the waitress came and placed their food before them.

[roswellianprincess16]

A/N: I always thought Alex was a very insightful person. After all, he and Maria spent years with this woman... they know her inside and out. And Maria is so busy grieving, she can't see what's right before her. True Blue huh? Never thought of it.

Chapter 3:

She looked around, not recognizing the strange room. Where was she? She felt fluttered and a bit terrified. Had she fallen asleep again at some random location?

“Morning.” She looked up and saw the familiar blue eyes. She looked around again, certain things coming into focus. She did recognize it. She was in Alex’s living room.

“Umm… yea, a little lost.” She laughed a bit and then brushed the loose strands of hair behind her ears. He sat on the arm of the sofa and stared at her for a moment, his eyes focused and interested. “What?”

“Nothing… it’s just. Liz used to do that a lot.”

“Do what?”

“The hair thing.”

“What hair thing?”

“Forget it, it’s stupid.” He smiled and reached out his hand. It was full of clothes. “Figured you’d need something to wear.”

She looked through them, a black top and jacket and some dark blue jeans. She recognized them immediately. The top was Maria’s. The jeans… they’d been Liz’s.

“Where’d you…?”

“Maria and Liz would sleep over sometimes. I always have extra clothes lying around.”

“Are you sure it’s ok?”

“Please. Just… yea. And black… since I’m sure there’s going to be a memorial at school today.” His voice softened and he lowered his head.

“I’d really love to go. Just to… pay my respects.”

“I’d like that too. Now go get in the shower, I have to call Maria and make sure she hasn’t fallen apart.” She nodded obediently and headed towards the shower, but not before one last look back. She’d never really thought of Alex as the strong one… then again, they’d never been faced with this kind of crisis. She thought of Maria and the pain she must be suffering. She didn’t want to hurt her.

She closed the door behind her and undressed as she heard the faint voice in the background.

“Maria… please, please stop crying. I know. I know, I miss her too. Look, maybe you should only stay for half the day today. You don’t sound too good. Ok. Of course. We’ll go get pizza. Oh, and there’s someone I want you to meet. Ok. I’ll see you there. Bye.”

She let the hot water hit her body as she washed away the memory of yesterday. It had been one of the most difficult things she’d ever had to do. But then she thought of Max. Was it worth it? How was he feeling today?

She felt a sudden image attack her mind. A picture of a cold and shivering Max, shirtless, barely able to walk. She shook it away. No… this was for his own good. She finished her shower and got dressed, the clothes fitting perfectly against her body. Odd, she thought. She hadn’t seen herself as the same size. She looked in the mirror and wiped her face dry with the towel. She had no makeup. Then again… today was a day of mourning. She would be natural. She let her hair air dry, the large loose red curls framing her face.

When she finally stepped out of the bathroom, Alex was in black jeans and a button down shirt. His hair was slicked back and he had a picture of he, Liz, and Maria pinned to his shirt pocket. She looked at it sadly, realizing suddenly that she had stopped referring to herself as Liz. Even mentally, she now referred to Liz as… Liz.

“Are you ready to go?” She nodded in response as they headed to a new world… one where she could no longer predict the outcome.

***

She watched as the crowd of kids gathered into the gymnasium, many of them wearing black, in memory of the one they’d lost. She wondered how many of them actually knew Liz, and then stood shocked of her own thought. How many of them knew HER. She would recognize them. She shook her head in frustration. She didn’t like what was happening. How she felt.

She stood at the doorway as Alex walked in, his head held low in respect and headed straight for Maria.

“Oh God Alex.” She cried into his arms as he held her, his hand behind her neck, his eyes looking down sadly. She reached her hand up to her mouth to contain the tears. She couldn’t watch this. She couldn’t believe she was the cause of their suffering. She turned away and caught another sight.

At the very end of the bleachers, all the way on the other side of the door, stood a shadow, leaning up against the wall, hands on his head. She recognized his silhouette immediately. She walked in slowly, heading in his direction, unsure of what she’d do when she got there.

She got a few feet away and froze. He lifted his head as his bloodshot eyes met hers for just a moment. She stood, helpless, unsure of what to do or say. She had never expected to see that kind of reaction. He held her gaze for longer than she expected; an uncomfortable current flowing through her veins. She’d hurt him. Badly.

He looked down and she saw his face wrinkle in pain. The face of pure agony and defeat as he continued to cry. Then she saw them come to his side. The tall, beautiful blonde looked down at him sadly, her eyes full of tears. But the tears were not for Liz Parker. The tears were very clearly for her brother. Michael put his hand on his shoulder and squeezed it tight. Then he looked down shamefully. They took his arms and led him outside into the quad. She continued to move, her legs leading her in a direction she herself was afraid to go. Everyone in the school was inside the gymnasium. Everyone but the three in the quad. She had to know why.

She walked out of the gym doors and into the bright morning sun. It almost seemed shameful to have it be so bright on such a gloomy day. She saw them in the distance, Max sitting on the stone bench, Michael and Isabel towering above him.

“You have to stop this Max, you have to. Ok? I know… I know that it’s difficult. It must be hard to have seen what you saw. But… Max, people are going to get concerned.”

“Isabel, will you give him a break?! Geez… the man just lost the girl he’s been pining over forever, how about a little time?”

“Michael, you know as well as I do that this kind of public display is going to get him sent to the guidance counselor for some serious therapy.”

“Maybe that’d be good.”

“No! No, it won’t. We need to stay low profile. Nothing’s changed.”

“WILL YOU TWO JUST LISTEN TO YOURSELVES?” She jumped, startled at the sound of his voice. It was deep, raspy, and painful to listen to. He sounded like a wounded animal. She looked to the side, exposing herself slightly from her hiding place behind the tree to look at him. He stood; his face full of disgust.

“Max… listen to me.”

“NO Isabel, you listen to me. Don’t you get it? Don’t both of you get it? This isn’t about us or our stupid secret anymore. Ok? This is about a girl who just died. Liz Parker is dead and it’s my fault. I just stood there and watched her die.” She cringed, the pure pain making her want to hold him and tell him she was alright.

“Maxwell, you have to stop saying that. There was nothing….”

“You know damn well that I could have done something! I could’ve… done SOMETHING.” That’s when he lost his power and had to sit down. He was again defeated. What was done, was done. “Anything.”

“Max. Max, I’m sorry.” Isabel whispered and walked away, obviously becoming too emotional to watch her brother suffer in that way.

“What am I going to do without her Michael?”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t you get it? She was the reason for my existence. I looked forward to every school year because I knew we’d be in one class together. I looked forward to dinner because I knew I’d get to see her smile. And she’s gone. Nothing… nothing’s ever going to be the same.”

“You can’t change who you are Maxwell… she didn’t know you.” He hesitated saying his last words, unsure of how they’d be received.

“She knew me on a level neither of you could. To her, I was just… human.” He stood up and walked away, following Isabel’s path out to the parking lot.

“You’re not the only one who wishes you were normal Max.” She heard Michael whisper as he headed in her direction. She scurried to hide, but instead decided to act as if she were taking a walk. He didn’t know her anyway; he had no reason to be suspicious. Then again, it was Michael.

“What are you doing here?” He asked roughly, his eyes obviously full of anger.

“Walking.” She stated simply, hoping he’d leave it alone.

“I didn’t hear you.”
“I just came out.” She lied and looked away, hoping he couldn’t see right through her bluff.

“Oh.”

“Did you know Liz?” She asked the question before she could stop herself. She saw his demeanor change as she mentioned her name. His head lowered and she could see the wheels in his head turning. He felt partially guilty. He was carrying both Max’s pain and his own.

“Sort of.” He whispered and stood there, his arms crossed, unsure of whether he wanted to go in there.

“I was there yesterday. I saw it all happen.” She whispered, the memory making knots in her stomach. It seemed like ages ago. She watched as his eyebrows went up and he looked at her questioningly.

“Yea?”

“Yea.” She waited, to see if he’d say anything, but his look made it obvious that he was now questioning who she was.

“I’ve never seen you before.” At least it wasn’t as rude as he usually was.

“I’m new here. My name is Serena.”

“Hmm.” He grunted and then turned to look back into the gym.

“The truth is… it all happened so fast. There was… there was really nothing anyone could’ve done to save her.” He stood frozen, his body tensing under her words, his face still looking into the gym.

“Maybe not.”

“I think everyone feels a measure of guilt. Everyone who was there… I know I do.” He turned his head around to meet her eyes. She could tell he was beginning to feel it now. His face registered a hurt she’d never seen before.

“It wasn’t anyone’s fault. It just happened. Stuff like that just happens.” He straightened up and then turned back away from her. With one last look into the gym she saw him prepare to leave. His hands were at his sides, and he turned to look at her one last time.

“You’re right. It does.”

“At least no one else was hurt.” He whispered and she looked at him wondering if he meant civilians or he, Max, and Isabel. “I gotta go.” He turned around and headed out the opposite direction. She stood there for a moment as she watched him leave.

She looked down at the green grass. She just wanted to lie there and disappear. Why did she feel like such a stranger to this world? Why did she have to come at such a painful time? She turned around and headed back toward the gym, the inside looking like a war zone. She didn’t want to do this anymore. She wanted to go back to her life as a normal girl.

“Serena!” She heard the voice cry out and she looked over to see Alex waving at her to come over. She took in a deep breath and walked on over to where he and Maria stood.

“Serena? Didn’t I… weren’t you…?” She stood before Maria and nodded her head sadly. “You were there yesterday.”

“Maria… I’m sorry about… about everything.” She tried to keep her cool as she watched Maria fall apart. She looked into her eyes, the eyes that generally held that happy luster and saw emptiness. No, Maria couldn’t be falling apart like this. She had to be strong. She had to know this wasn’t the end. She went to say something else when she saw Maria’s eyes widen in horror.

“Alex… what is that?” She looked down at to where Maria was pointing and failed to register what the problem was. She looked down at her clothes, jeans, a black shirt….

“Oh… well, she was all alone last night and I….”

“THOSE ARE LIZ’S PANTS!”

“Maria… I know. Calm down.”

“Alex, how could you… oh no, I can’t believe you would just go forgetting Liz that quickly! I just… those are Lizzie’s!”

“Maria, I know. Calm down.”

“I’m sorry… I didn’t know it was going to be a problem.” She looked around desperately. She needed to get out of there. “I’m sorry. I should’ve never come here.” She turned around and ran finding any place of solitude.

She reached an empty spot in the hallway and listened to the eerie sound of children mourning and crying down the hall. It was the only sound and it seemed to be penetrating her skin. She sunk down, hoping not to hear it from the floor. But it continued to haunt her and it seemed to get louder.

“Stop it… stop it!”

“This area is already taken.” She heard a sad voice whisper. She looked over and caught a glimpse of a form underneath the staircase.

“I’m sorry… I hadn’t seen anyone.” She stood up, a bit startled and walked closer to the stairs.

“Don’t come any closer. There’s nothing to see here. I need some space ok?” She stood still, suddenly recognizing his voice.

“Kyle?” There was a moment of silence and then she heard him move.

“Do I know you?” She’d done it again. Stuck her big mouth in the wrong place.

“You’re Kyle Valenti right? Basketball star? We’re in the same trig class.” She smiled slightly and took another step. Finally, his face came up out of the shadows and she looked at him sadly. His eyes were full of tears and he looked like the saddest person in the world.

“Yea. I saw you there yesterday. I… I umm… I didn’t mean to scare you. I just… I needed some space.”

“I understand. There doesn’t seem to be an available corner anywhere.” She smiled and headed over to him as she slid on the floor by his side. She heard him laugh a bit and felt her smile widen.

“I just. No one ever thinks that this kind of stuff happens you know? We had just started dating….” He looked down sadly and she looked down as well, a twinge of guilt at knowing it wouldn’t have lasted long anyway. He would have still gotten his heart broken.

“I know this may seem like nothing right now. But… you’re still young Kyle. You’re still going to be able to go on and meet girls and fall in love. The world isn’t ending today.”

“Not for us… but it did for Liz.” He got up and turned to look back at her, a small smile on his face. “You know, it’s funny. I really thought we might’ve had something special.” He laughed at the irony and turned away, leaving her to her own thoughts.

There was so much she’d missed. Why hadn’t she seen all these things when they were happening? Why had she missed seeing Max stare at her lustfully all those years? Why had she missed seeing Alex’s undying loyalty? Why had she missed seeing Kyle’s true feelings? She thought of all the people in her life. Was this some way to show her how wrong she was?

As if on cue a newspaper sheet came flying in from the staircase doorway. TEENAGER DIES IN CAFÉ DISPUTE TURNED VIOLENT.

She stared at the picture for a moment, the image of the CrashDown again coming into her head. She would get a chance to go back. For some reason, she was sure of it. She didn’t see why she’d have memories of the past if she would be stuck in the present forever. It just wouldn’t be right. But she had to do something first. It was all a formula. Like those movies where the only way to save someone was by completing a task. She just had to find out what her task was.

She stood up from the stairwell and walked back into the hallway, unsure of where to start. She headed towards the main doors and walked out into the day. She needed some serious time to think. She headed off to the only place that would allow her to do that. Her balcony.

[roswellianprincess16]

A/N: What's going to happen with Max and Serena/Liz you all ask? Well... let's see.

Chapter 4:

She carefully crept up the fire escape and onto the brick balcony. She couldn’t be too careful. After all, there had been cops and detectives going in and out of the restaurant, trying to clear the area.

She looked around and found what she’d been looking for. Her journal. She opened it up and smelled the new paper. She hadn’t even had a chance to write one entry. She creased the middle and passed her hand over the clean white page. She looked around and found a pen lying under the lounge chair.

Sticking around would be dangerous. But she definitely needed to write. She took the pen and journal and headed back down the fire escape and into the park. The day was still bright and she was beginning to feel the park was the only neutral ground. The only place where she could go without being hassled, questioned, or found.

She sat quietly on the bench, letting the sun warm her skin. The sun was still strong for a September day. She looked down at the journal and began to write.

September 19th 1999

My name is Liz Parker and I died yesterday. And I don’t mean the general symbolic dying that all teenagers profess to do once in their lives. No. I mean, I literally died yesterday.

Today I am Serena Mitchell. Stranger and newcomer to a town I’ve always known. I have no friends. I have no family. But I have a mission.

If there was anything I learned from watching the events unfold before my eyes yesterday, it’s that you can’t change the course of life without serious repercussions. I wanted so badly to go back, to make things better for all of them. But now I see that my one act, selfless as I thought it was, has caused more grief and pain than I’ve ever wanted to see or experience.

My goal is to now restore the balance. The dark cloud I have hung here cannot stay forever. I may be unrecognizable, but I’m not without the ability to act. I can give everyone a new reason to love life.

And maybe this is a miracle… even for me. Maybe now, I can live without restrictions. Live the life Liz Parker never could have. I have nothing holding me back from being the most incredible person I can be. That’s exactly what I intend to do.

She looked down at her writing and smiled. Finally, she had a goal. She had a plan. She closed the journal and sighed, a feeling of completion coming over her. She looked down at her watch. 1:30 PM. She still had more than enough time to do all she had to do. She stood up to begin heading out when she saw the familiar face. She held her breath, his face still making her heart tremble.

He walked in the distance, the path of trees ahead of him forming what seemed to be a narrow, dark road. A sudden random thought sunk in her head.

I took the road less traveled by and that made all the difference. She had read the line in one of Robert Frost’s poems. The image stirred something in her. She would no longer take the safe well traveled road. If she wanted to make a difference… if she wanted to complete her mission, she would do something out of character. Then she thought to herself… out of character for who? Liz Parker perhaps? But she was not Liz Parker. She was Serena Mitchell.

With that she jogged the short way toward him and then slowed, trying to regulate her breathing and avoid scaring him. Finally, she reached his side and walked beside him, in complete silence, as he looked over at her.

She sensed his curious eyes and she looked over, her entire body warming at his gaze.

“No one should have to walk alone.” She said with a sad smile and then looked down as they continued to walk together in silence. She could still feel him looking over at her, every once in a while, staring with a puzzled look. Finally, they came to the end of the trail and he stopped, so she stopped with him. She turned to face him and he simply looked at her. He hadn’t demanded that she leave. But he had yet to ask her why she was there.

“A kind stranger kept me company yesterday when I needed it most. I felt I should repay the favor.” She smiled this time, and reached her hand out to shake his. “My name is Serena.”

“Speech.” He shook her hand and she looked at him curiously. “You’re in my speech class.”
“Oh yea. That’s right.” She had yet to figure out her schedule. She let her hand linger in his, enjoying the sensation of his skin. Interestingly, she felt a tingle in her fingers, as if there were some static electricity between them. Was it possible that they still held some sort of connection? He let her hand go and she brought hers into her pockets sadly, wanting to keep the warmth there.

“Why did you really walk with me?” He stared at her, his eyes still red and sad from what she could only assume was an awful day full of tears.

“Because I know how it feels to lose someone you love.” She whispered and looked down, instantly regretting her words. He stood, quiet for a moment, and then she looked up and was shocked to see he was staring at her. Could he see through her? Was he perhaps the only one who would figure her out?

“I barely knew her.” He finally whispered and then turned, now beginning a trek out of the park. She walked alongside him still, as long as he enjoyed her company, she would remain by his side.

“I saw you… at the gym today. I saw your pain. I felt it. You don’t grieve like that over someone you barely knew.” She said and then decided it was safe to continue, in order to keep him comfortable. She didn’t want him thinking she was prying. She just wanted to find a common ground. “I had to say goodbye to someone that I cared deeply about in order to save his life.”

He listened intently, never looking over at her, simply walking beside her.

“We had run into a few problems. And I thought… I guess I thought our love could overcome anything. But… the truth is… being who I was… hurt him.” She listened to her own words and found a ridiculous irony in them. She’d basically fallen in Max’s own shoes. He had always been afraid that his being different would harm her. Yet, it was the boring life of Liz Parker that exposed all he was. She finally kept silent and they walked a while longer, heading into town.

“I guess I feel slightly responsible. I mean, I know there’s nothing people could have done. But… I wish I had stepped in… somehow. I miss her.” She listened to his words and felt her throat thicken. How subtly he hinted at his being able to help her. How frightened he must have been of the repercussions. His previous words came swirling in her head.

It was you.

He would have risked it all.

“Can I ask you something?” She looked at him suddenly, hoping she wasn’t stepping out of line. He simply looked over and nodded. “What was it about her? I mean, you say you barely knew her… but you speak as if… well as if there was something more.”

They stood in silence for a few more moments and he finally stopped, as she realized they were standing before the UFO Museum, across the street from the CrashDown. So close, yet so far from home.

“She represented everything that was normal for me. I’d been in classes with her since the third grade. We’ve worked on science projects; she tried teaching me Spanish in middle school, but I was just awful; she’s the very first person I saw when I came to this town, the very first person to notice me. Losing that… my life has just suddenly been flipped upside down. You know?”

She stared into his eyes, shock probably registering in her own. He’d just opened up and said one of the most honest and open things she could have ever imagined. To a total stranger. She nodded in response and then he turned to look at the UFO Center. He was trying to bid her goodbye.

“I, uh… I have to go to work. I’m starting my first day.” She smiled and looked up at the big building, a question rising in her mind. Why did he still want to work there? To torture himself? To look over at the CrashDown and remember that day?

“Ok. So, I guess I’ll see you at school then.” She smiled and turned to leave when she felt his arm on her shoulder. She felt the tingle again, the faint electric surge through her entire body. Could he feel it?

“Thank you. I hadn’t realized how badly I needed to talk to someone. So… yea.” He smiled, a smile that warmed her heart.

“It was my pleasure.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” He stepped into the center and disappeared. She looked back over at the CrashDown and decided she was ready. Her plan had already been set in motion.

***

She stood before the door and wriggled her fingers slightly. It had all seemed so simple in her head. She bent her knees a bit, trying to get the nervousness out. This would work. It had to work. She reached her finger up and rang the bell. She looked down and saw the bottom of the door swing open as two feet stood, with perfectly painted toenails. She followed them up and into the face of Maria DeLuca.

“Hi. Before you say anything, I came to return something.” She reached out and handed her the jeans, neatly folded and clean. Maria looked at her stunned, her hand smoothing over the pants in her hands.

“I… I don’t understand.”
“I didn’t mean to offend you. In fact, it was the last thing I wanted, especially after a day like today. I know this might not make sense to you right now, but the truth is, I had nothing else and Alex said it was alright. Anyway, I was wrong. And I’m sorry. I figured you should have them.” She turned to walk away and she heard Maria call out to her.

“Hey! Wait a minute!” She ran down the path and met her halfway. “I’m sorry about the way I freaked out. It’s been… a rough day to say the least. I shouldn’t have totally spazzed on you like that. I just didn’t know what else to do.” Maria looked at her apologetically and she smiled. There was something different about Maria. A calmness she hadn’t had earlier. Had she spoken to Alex? Had he been able to soothe her pain?

“Please don’t apologize. This is a difficult time. A good friend of mine once said that at times like this, it’s ok to be irrational.” She smiled, relaying back the good advice Maria had herself once told her. Surprisingly, she heard her laugh softly.

“Yea, you’ve got a smart friend.” Maria smiled and they stood there for a moment in silence. She looked down, suddenly stuck, not sure what else to do or say. She reached up to her hair and placed it nervously behind her hear, the few loose strands in her face having fallen from the ponytail in back. She saw Maria stiffen, her hands firmly in place at her sides. She almost thought she heard her whisper something but couldn’t quite make out the words.

“Well, that was it. I don’t want to keep you.” She started to turn again when she heard her name.

“Serena?”

“Yea Maria?” She turned to face her best friend and there was a tenderness in her eyes.

“Do you want to… maybe join us for dinner? Maybe we can talk. Get you acquainted with the town and the people.”

“Are you sure? I mean, I know this is a bad time.”

“Liz would have wanted me to spend it with friends.” Maria smiled and took her hand to lead her inside. She looked around the familiar kitchen and smiled. How odd it was to be there… as someone else. She removed her sneakers and placed them neatly by the edge of the door. Maria turned to say something and stopped as she was turning back around to face her. There was a stunned look on Maria’s face. Something was wrong. Did she say something? Do something wrong? She looked around the kitchen and then back down at her feet. The sneakers. Oh God… she’d forgotten not to do that with her sneakers.

“Hey Maria who was it?” Suddenly Alex appeared at the living room/kitchen entrance and smiled, recognizing the familiar face. “I thought I wouldn’t see you again for a while.”

“I just came by to apologize. I didn’t know you had company, I’ll just go.” She started to leave and he ran to grab her arm.

“No. No, please don’t go. Maria invited you to stay right?” He looked over at Maria who was still staring at the door and then back at her. She could simply nod her head.

“Then stay. We can all have dinner and talk.” She cringed inwardly at what that could mean. Was he figuring her out? Would he know if she said too much? Or would they think it all a strange coincidence?

“Ok.”

“Go freshen up. The bathroom is that way.” He pointed down the hall and she nodded and headed obediently in that direction. She closed the door behind her and listened carefully to the struggled words in the kitchen.

“You were right.”

“It’s incredible, isn’t it?”

“I just… it’s almost impossible to believe. It’s… it’s a little weird Alex.”

“It’s a blessing Maria. God’s way of reminding us that it’s never really over. Maybe her arriving right now is important. I really just want to take care of her. Help her. Befriend her.”

“I look at her and it’s like… I see Liz in there somewhere. And for a second, I almost forget she’s gone.”

“It makes the pain less, doesn’t it?”

She didn’t hear the answer, but she smiled anyway. Things were looking up already.

***

“Wow… that was way too funny.” She grabbed her stomach, trying to keep the giggles to a minimum.

“Yea, it really was absolutely hilarious. Alex had been doing that thing with his arms for years, but I guess this one time, he just got stuck! It was the weirdest looking thing I’d ever seen! It definitely didn’t do anything for him with the ladies that’s for sure.” Maria winked and he threw his pillow at her, a smirk on his own face.
“Maybe that’s true Maria, but I think if I’d gotten tangled in my arms a few times, I’d have girls feeling so sorry for me that they’d come flocking over to detangle me.” They all laughed and Maria looked at him wickedly.

“You mean like Isabel Evans?” There was a small silence and Alex looked at them both. Maria looked over and smiled at Serena. She had just let the cat out of the bag.

“You like Isabel Evans?” She smiled, realizing that things had been changing even before that fateful September day.

“Well, I mean she’s hot. Oh come on you guys, you act like I can’t be attracted to a girl.”

“Hey, you said it, I didn’t.” Maria laughed and Alex made a sarcastic face.

“Why don’t you ask her out?” Suddenly, the room went silent. Maria stared at her, their eyes looking into each other’s questioningly.

“Are you serious? Do you realize what you just said? We’re talking about Isabel Evans. You know what, I’m gonna let that slide because you’re new and you don’t exactly know about her.”

“She’s the tall blonde, the one who walks as if she were on a cloud, high above all the rest of the heads in West Roswell.” Alex nodded and then smiled at the image.

“Yea. Exactly.”

“Yea so? Ever thought that maybe acting all high and mighty is her way to avoid disappointment? I mean, everyone puts on an act sometimes… to hide who they really are.”

“Is that what you’re doing Serena? Putting on an act?” She looked over at Alex surprised, the question throwing her off guard.

“What do you mean?”

“You were lying on a bench in the park. You haven’t been home in two days and it seems like no one is even looking for you.”

“Why are you questioning me? It’s not like I have parents that are concerned about my well being. I’m a number. Another body to keep warm and fed. They don’t care if I don’t show up.”

“They?” Maria looked at her curiously. She was digging a deep whole and she wanted to just bury herself in it.

“Roswell Home for Children. I was abandoned as a child and I was placed in several orphanages….”

“Stop. Serena, I don’t believe anything you’re saying right now. You’re not a good liar. Something is happening.”

“What do you mean?”

“According to the rules, you can’t have someone else’s essence while they’re still alive. Then again, you only just showed up yesterday. You talk like her, you have her sense of humor, you even tuck your hair behind your ears like her.”

“But then again, you’re different. There’s something inside you I never saw in her. A determination, a knowledge, even a strength that she never had. In that sense, you’re very different.”

“But there is not strict rule that you have to be exactly like her. You are after all, a different person.” She looked back and forth from Alex to Maria, trying to take in their train of thought. Trying not to panic and think logically of something that will make sense. She was drawing a blank.

“What are you talking about?”

“Liz, Serena. Somewhere deep inside there is Liz.” There was a moment of silence as she stood up off the bed. The air was suddenly very tense. This moment could change everything.

“Look… I’m sorry about your loss. I know that you both loved Liz very much. But maybe, maybe this is all part of a greater plan. Maybe it’s important that it happened this way. I’m not saying that it makes it easier. And I’m sorry that I’m a constant painful reminder of what you’ve lost. But I am NOT Liz. I’m Serena. And despite our similarities we are very different. I… I’m not smart, I’m not always polite, I’m broken. Ok? What I know and what I’ve seen… I’m darker than Liz Parker could have been up to the time of her death. Please… I can’t tell you both how much I need and appreciate your friendship. Will you please just accept me for me?” They looked at her, a silence connecting them, as they both nodded.

“I guess I just needed to believe that she was somehow still here with me.” Maria looked down sadly and sighed as she put her hand on her shoulder.

“I don’t know if it makes it any better… but I’m here. And I don’t plan on going anywhere.” She smiled, suddenly realizing the extent of her words. She was getting settled. Finally, she was feeling safer in her skin. This would be the beginning of their life with Serena Mitchell.

***

She looked around the dark hallway. No one seemed to be in the building, the night staff must have already gone home. She headed down toward the gym. She needed a shower. She went through the lockers, the ones without locks, looking for anything she could use. Nothing. She headed toward the storage closet. She’d find something. Then she thought to herself… her locker. Could she find something in her locker? She ran outside into the hallways and found her old locker. She moved the lock, remembering the numbers perfectly. She opened it, the sound echoing in the quiet hallway. She pulled out the extra pair of jeans and beige shirt. This would have to do.

She stood in the shower and let the hot water fall on her skin. It had been an interesting evening. Alex and Maria thought that she was Liz’s ghost incarnate. Not that she could blame them, there were still some things, some habits she couldn’t get rid of. But she was already starting to feel different. She thought of the day old homework sitting in her bookbag. She knew she should have done it. After all, the trauma at the CrashDown excuse would only pan out for a few days. But she wasn’t feeling up to it. She really didn’t even want to look into the big Biology book. She thought back to the many well graded tests she’d received. Liz Parker had been one smart cookie. Then again… she hadn’t been smart enough to know that once you go back, you affect everything. Then again, she had never been much of a philosophical person. She was much more logical, rational and… well she thought in a straight line. Serena was seeing the world in many dimensions. There was time and there was occurrence and then there was her place. She was caught between two times… between two people. How would she save them all?

She turned the water off and dried off with her dirty clothes. She shook off her thick curls and pulled down some gym mats. This would have to be her place to crash tonight. She closed her eyes and could see images swirling in her head. Max’s eyes looking into hers, his mouth swirled upward slightly in a smile. Another person smiling back at him. She thought it was a memory… an old thought plaguing her slightly. But she was wrong. The face smiling back at him was not Liz Parker’s. It was hers.

[roswellianprincess16]

A/N: A few things. I'll be busy during the weekend... so this is my last post until Monday. Also, xmag, you brought out some great points. Surprisingly, Grandma Claudia will actually be showing up soon. lol you weren't supposed to guess that! Either way... because most of the story is told in Serena's POV... i cannot show the Parkers POV, but I can show their actions through her eyes. OK? Well, for now enjoy this chapter!

Chapter 5:

She made sure she was awake by 4:30 AM in order to miss the arriving teachers. She pulled the sample toothpaste pack out of her pocket, the one she’d stolen from the gym teacher’s office, and locked herself in the bathroom to get rid of her morning breath. She looked in the mirror. She did not like the way she looked. She looked like she’d been sleeping on a hard mat. She shrugged and reached into her bookbag pulling out a rubber band she’d had holding her pencils. She tossed her hair up, letting some curls fall in her face and the rest being tied back in a ponytail. Better.

She headed out towards the quad to wait it out until it was time for students to arrive. She opened the journal ready to write out the second entry. She’d had a revelation the night before. Something she desperately felt she had to get down on paper.

What I realized last night is something that might change my direction. I am here to return a balance, not to replace what has been lost. I am NOT Liz Parker… but I do carry her memories, her passion for life. I love her friends, I love this life, but I cannot replace her. I have realized that Liz Parker held a place in all their lives that cannot be replaced. Not even by someone as similar as I. But I can begin to lead them in a better direction. I can begin to educate them, to unite them slowly. Without the FBI, without the exposure and without the running. Maybe this time, it can be different.

She stopped as she saw the shadow descend upon her. She looked up slowly at the person standing before her.

“No one should have to sit alone.” She smiled, realizing that he’d been listening to her that day. She moved over and tapped on the bench, inviting him to sit with her.

“What are you doing out here so early?” She closed her journal momentarily and looked into his golden eyes, seeking some answers.

“I could ask you the same question.” He smiled and she couldn’t resist the urge to smile back. Suddenly, an image flashed in her mind. She had seen this exact picture. She had seen it last night, right before she drifted off to sleep. But how? How could she have thought of something that hadn’t happened?

“Well, I just… oh come on I asked you first.” She laughed trying to think up a good excuse.

“Ok. Umm… I guess I just needed some alone time this morning. I’m still plagued with images of what happened and last night, when I was dreaming, I actually stopped it. And I just thought of what you said… how maybe it’s a greater plan. And you know what? I think you’re right.” His face was serious now and she stared into his eyes.

“I didn’t really think you were listening.” She smiled and he smiled back, knowing that it could have easily seemed that way.

“I know I was out of it… but… well I was listening.”

“I just… look, we’re both going through a really rough time right now. And I know it makes it easier to know there’s someone you can talk to. Someone who won’t judge you or question your feelings. I’d like to be that someone… if you let me.” She got serious now, afraid that she might be treading on delicate ground. After all, it might easily seem like she was making a pass at him.

“But you don’t even know me.”

“And you don’t know me. But that’s what time is for.” He looked at her now, his eyes full of curiosity. Then his expression settled into a smile.

“I’d like that.”

“So would I.” Finally she smiled and looked back down at her closed journal. If he only knew the secrets she held in there. He looked down at his back pack and back up at her face with a smirk.

“You ready for the Biology test today?” Her head went spinning as she looked at him wide eyed.

“The WHAT?”

“Bio test. Today. Third period.” Her face drew a blank and he laughed.

“You didn’t study?”

“I didn’t even know we were having a test today. With everything going on… I’m surprised you even remembered.” He laughed lightly and reached in to grab his book.

“Here. Let me just show you some of the main points.” She nodded and leaned in closer as he gave her lessons in Biology, a subject she was suddenly thankful to know very little about.

***

She sat in class bored out of her mind. She had never realized how much this teacher mumbled. She looked down at her watch. There was still almost an hour left before lunch. She wanted to die. She hadn’t eaten breakfast and her stomach was making all sorts of unruly noises. She looked at the teacher, his back to the students, writing on the board with a piece of chalk that was trying to get them all to kill themselves. She looked toward the door. Could she? Would she? She looked out the window at the beautiful sunny day. She grabbed her backpack and waited to hear a cue of some kind. The teacher sighed and continued on his monotonous track and she stood and crept out the open door.

She walked down the hallway, as if she had a place to go and smirked. She couldn’t even believe it had been that easy. She slipped out the double doors and into the grounds near the field. She watched as some of the boys played football and saw Kyle Valenti off on the side lines, writing in a notebook. She walked over hoping to talk to him, if only for a moment. She’d been concerned about him… his sadness had been hard to watch. He at least deserved a listening ear.

She stood above him as he stopped his writing and looked up.

“Hey.” She smiled, hoping that he wouldn’t push her away.

“Hey back.” He said and she sat beside him, more comfortable than she perhaps should be.

“Why aren’t you playing?”

“I’m writing.”

“Writing?” She looked at him curiously and resisted the urge to laugh. Why would he write rather than play football?

“Yea. I guess since what happened I’ve been kinda thinking about the meaning of life and all that stuff. I’ve been reading up on religion and God and just trying to find something to believe in.” She looked at him and smiled. It was nice to see Kyle concerned about something other than football or rifles.

“And what did you find?” She asked tenderly, hoping to find a comfortable spot, not too painful but not too personal.

“Buddhism.” She paused for a second and looked at him, unsure if he was serious. Out of all religions he chose Buddhism?

“Oh?”

“They believe that the soul continues to live on in another plane of life, another life form.”

“Reincarnation.”

“Exactly.”

“It seems I’ve had that term more often than I’d like to think.”

“What, you don’t believe?”

“It’s a belief that is very much based on faith.”

“Don’t you have faith?”

“I do.”

“But not in that.”

“Guess not.” She looked out into the field suddenly in deep thought. She wasn’t quite sure how to answer him.

“Then what do you have faith in?” She looked over at him and they met eyes for a moment, uncertainty in her own.

“There was a time when I believed.” She looked down and away toward the end of the field, the sun shining strongly on her face, a slight breeze waving her red curls in the air.

“But?”

“I guess I got lost somewhere.”

“Well… welcome young Padawan. Remain under my teaching and I will train you in the ways of the force.” She started laughing and leaned into his shoulder to bump him but pushed too hard and he toppled over.

“Oh! Sorry!” She laughed even harder, not able to control the giggles. She hadn’t realized how badly she’d needed to laugh.

“The force is strong with this one.” He stated as he tried getting up and couldn’t because he was laughing so hard.

“You’re so retarded.” She laughed and he nodded.

“Yea, I know.”

“It’s nice to see you smiling.”

“Well, it’s a beautiful day. It’s hard to be gloomy on days like this. But give me a good rainy day. I’ll be the most unpleasant person you’ve ever met.”

“No thanks.” She smiled and began to stand as the bell rang for lunch. “I gotta go. I’m starving.”

“And you’re gonna eat lunch here?” He looked at her as if she were crazy.

“Yea, what’s wrong with the food here?”

“Everyone mainly brings their lunch.”

“Oh.” She looked down and frowned to herself. “Guess I’ll just have to steal someone’s lunch then.” She laughed and waved as she headed back inside to find her two saviors. Alex and Maria were sure to have SOMETHING. And she needed to eat before she keeled over and died. She just couldn’t afford to die again so soon.

***

“Hey! We were looking for you. We went to get you at the end of English but you weren’t there.” Maria looked at her questioningly and Serena looked around sheepishly, not sure what to say.

“Actually, I was out on the field. I uh… I was bored out of my mind and I thought if I stayed in that class another second I might morph into an unpleasant and violent being.”

Alex laughed, knowing what she meant. They headed toward a table in the cafeteria and she looked outside longingly.

“You know what? It’s really nice out guys. You mind eating outside?”

“Nope. Love days like this.” They walked through the crowds and into the quad as they sat on the grass and began to open their bookbags and removing food. She looked at them amused by their food choices. Alex brought out three fruit, one apple, one pear, and one banana. Maria removed an old fashioned lunch box and three sandwiches in zip bags. Alex removed three bags of chips and Maria brought out three juice boxes.

“Ok? Think this is enough?”

“If we still get hungry we’ll stop at Quick Stop after school.” She looked at them amused and then started laughing.

“Are you guys serious?”

“Yea, here. We brought you lunch. Alex, here’s your PB & J. Here’s my Tuna Melt and I wasn’t sure what you’d want so I took a chance.” Maria handed over her sandwich and she looked at it curiously. “It’s a Galaxy sub, light on the mayo with ham, salami and turkey, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, and oil and vinegar.”

She felt her stomach growl loudly and looked down, suddenly very embarrassed.

“Sorry.”

“Guess you were hungry.” Maria raised an eyebrow and handed her the bag of chips and the apple. “You don’t mind the apple, do you?”

“No actually, that’s perfect.” She smiled and began to unwrap her sandwich gratefully. She took a bite and savored it, suddenly realizing how hungry she’d been. “Mmm… Maria this is great. Thank you.”

“No problem girl.” She watched as Maria and Alex began to eat themselves and then saw the familiar face in the distance, just a few feet away, sitting on a blanket, her golden blonde hair looking like a halo with the sun shining behind her. She watched her for a few moments, eating alone, not aware of any of her surroundings. Where was Michael? And Max for that matter? She looked at Alex, eating his sandwich happily and smiled. She had an idea.

“Hey Alex. You know how we were talking yesterday about Isabel Evans?”

“Uh huh.” He mentioned between bites.

“She’s sitting over there all by herself. I think you should go talk to her.” He coughed suddenly, his hand to his mouth as he tried not to choke on the piece of the sandwich.

“Are you serious?”

“So serious.”

“Serena… come on. You don’t want to embarrass him. Isabel Evans is like… she’s like high society. Ok? And us? We’re like new money. She won’t even give him the time of day.”

“Look… we’ve all agreed that we’ve learned a valuable lesson. Live today like it’s your last day. Right?” She looked over at Alex as he slowly put down his food and looked back at Isabel. He was considering it. “Alex, it’s now or never.” She smiled and nodded her head encouragingly. Maria looked on concerned and sighed loudly. He looked at her for a moment, as if waiting for approval.

“She’s right. Who’s to say she’s not being charitable today?” She rolled her eyes and shrugged as he stood up excitedly.

“You’re right. You’re right, I’m going.” He stood up and headed toward Isabel, taking slow, deliberate steps as if still considering his actions. She watched him nervously, hoping she hadn’t misinterpreted Isabel’s body language.

“I hope you know what you’re doing. His heart breaks easy.” Maria looked at Serena worriedly and she smiled to reassure her.

“Trust me… there’s something about her. She needs someone like Alex.” Maria looked down and continued to eat her sandwich as she shrugged.

“Yea, guess so. Listen… I wanted to ask you something.”

“Ok.” She looked back at Maria and they stared into each other’s eyes for a moment, as if she were searching for something inside.

“I was wondering if maybe you wanted to stay at my house. I just… I can’t bear the thought of you staying at that place all alone.” She tried not to breathe a sigh of relief. She would have a place to stay.

“Maria. Can I be totally honest with you right now?” Maria nodded and she looked down for a moment, wondering how much she was willing to share. “I really don’t have a place to stay. I don’t have clothes and I don’t have money. If I could maybe get a job, I could get my own place and my own clothes… but for now….”

“Stop! Don’t even say it. You’re staying with me tonight and that’s final. I’ll take you shopping after school and get you some jeans and shirts. The rest you can borrow. We’re about the same size.” She smiled thankfully and then looked directly into Maria’s eyes once more.

“I know that this is all really weird for you. But I promise you that in time… it’ll all make sense. It’ll all be normal again.”

“I know. It’s already starting to feel good again. Thanks to you.” Maria smiled and they both looked over as they heard the loud laughter coming from behind them. It seemed that Isabel Evans was laughing at something Alex Whitman had just said. And Alex looked over and smiled.

She was right. One down. Two to go.

[roswellianprincess16]

Chapter 6:

She walked past the CrashDown and froze wanting so badly to go inside. She wanted to talk to the Parkers, ease their pain. But she was terrified. Terrified that they would look into her eyes and see her for what she was inside. A version of their very own lost daughter.

She walked up to the doors and stood looking in. The place had been closed down for 4 days, since the shooting. She had seen people going in and out. Mainly police and detectives. But not once had she seen them actually out in the sunshine, trying to heal. She stood there looking for a sign of life, anything to calm her heart. She’d been so busy trying to prove that she wasn’t Liz that she hadn’t had any time to calm her fears about her very own family. Off in the distance, through the window in the kitchen she could see her mother, her red hair pulled back into a ponytail, her face covered in grief. She looked at her own reflection in the glass doors and touched her red hair. Was there some reason she was made to look like her mother in this life? How odd. She had never even thought of it. Was it some sort of coincidence?

“Are you alright honey?” She froze, not wanting to recognize the voice that was beside her. It wasn’t possible. Was it? She turned her head to look into the friendly eyes of Grandma Claudia. She felt her breath catch in her chest and her eyes water. Claudia’s face changed suddenly, full of concern as she held her shoulders. “Oh darling, it’s alright. It’ll all be ok.” Claudia pulled her in for a hug and she held back the tears she wanted so badly to shed.

“You must have known my little Lizzie.” She nodded, the only thing she could do to respond.

“There was so much she wasn’t able to experience.” Suddenly, she felt like crying again, realizing how sad it truly was. She felt defeated. Liz had not gotten the chance to fall in love, to mature into a smart and decisive woman. She was ripped of all that because of this one desperate wish. It was so complicated.

“Life is sometimes full of unexpected surprises. It’s what you do with them and how you deal with them that makes life worth living.” She looked at her sadly, suddenly realizing the extent of her sacrifice. How could she feel she was wrong when Grandma Claudia now had the chance to live again?

“I’m afraid the Parkers aren’t going to make it through this.” She looked up at Grandma Claudia and saw a hint of understanding in her eyes.

“They’re strong. Stronger than they know at this particular moment. It may seem like the end of the world right now, but they will continue to live. As we all must.”

“But what if we don’t want to continue living like this anymore?” She looked down suddenly, not sure if that came out how she wanted. Claudia allowed for a silence to come between them.

“You are very torn inside. And it’s not all about this tragedy. What’s wrong?” She let her hand linger on her shoulder and Serena felt a warmth coming from her. A calming feeling she had so desired.

“I made a decision. A rash decision without completely thinking about how it would affect everything. And now, now it’s hurting everyone that I love. I just… I don’t want to be responsible for all of their pain.” She allowed her tears to fall now, not knowing what else to do. Claudia simply smiled at her, giving her the encouragement she needed.

“Let me tell you something. Sometimes in life we make some bad decisions. But life has a way of fixing itself. Everyone has a path to follow… if something changes that path… it might be difficult initially to get back on track. However, you will. You will find the answers where you least expect and then you’ll be back to normal.”

She went to say something else when an unexpected voice startled her.

“Oh! Grandma Claudia!” She turned to see Maria, her face full of emotion, hugging Claudia tightly.

“Oh Maria… hello!” They stood hugging for a few moments and then she pulled away and looked at her.

“Serena, what are you doing here?”
“Nothing.” She rubbed the tears away and tried to smile. Maria looked at her suspiciously and then back at Claudia.

“I see you met Grandma Claudia. Perhaps the best person in the world.”

“Yes, she’s wonderful.” She smiled, hoping to ease the tension building in her body. As always, Grandma had managed to give her direction, the right direction to fulfill her obligation.

“Serena here seemed to be having a bad day. She was very upset and I felt I had to try and calm her a bit.”

“She’s a friend of mine Grandma. A very special person.”

“Maria….” She looked at her with wide eyes, warning her not to take it there.

“Special?” Claudia smiled and raised her eyebrows questioningly.

“Yes. Tell her.” She shook her head, refusing to take part in the madness.

“Tell me what?”

“Alex and I believe she has Liz’s essence. That she’s here to help us ease the pain.”

“Interesting.” Claudia’s eyes narrowed a bit as she inspected the girl before her. She looked away, suddenly feeling incredibly self conscious.

“No, no it’s not interesting. They’ve been doing nothing but plotting this conspiracy for days.”

“You don’t believe it?”

“I don’t believe in that stuff.”

“What do you believe in?” Claudia looked at her curiously.

“I… I don’t know anymore. I guess I used to think that with faith everything was possible. And then something big happened and now there’s no way to reverse it. And now I’m sorry that I ever believed to begin with.” Maria gasped as she finished her sentence and she and Claudia looked at each other.

“Oh no… no no no Serena.”

“Oh child, you should never be sorry that you believed.”

“Well, what difference does it make?! Belief or not, I’m here in this town with no parents and no future! How is belief helping me with that?” Claudia looked into her eyes and took a step closer.

“You are going to do something drastic. Something big that’s going to change everything.”

“Oh please, I’m beyond that.”

“No. You’re going to be put in a situation where you will have to make a very important decision. It will change you and how you look at life. But it won’t be an easy choice. And you might be the one to suffer the major consequences.”

Serena looked around and then back at Claudia. She smiled uncomfortably and looked at Maria.

“What is she like psychic?”

“She’s been known to have a bit of a fifth sense.”

“Sixth sense, Maria. Sixth. She already has five.” Maria shrugged and rolled her eyes. They all had to laugh.

“Well, I have to run. I was supposed to meet someone this afternoon for homework help. Maria, I’ll see you tonight?” Maria nodded in response and Serena looked over at Grandma Claudia one last time and smiled. “It was nice meeting you.”

Claudia smiled and nodded as she left the area, hoping to get some thinking time. What had she meant by an important decision? She had always believed Claudia knew things she could never understand. That she had been blessed with a strong sense of prediction. But if that were the case? Why didn’t she sense her very own granddaughter would be shot and killed? Then again… maybe she had and that’s why she’d returned to Roswell the first time around. Granted, a few months later, but she came, unexpected none the less.

She walked down the streets of Roswell pensive, hoping to get some sort of sign of what direction she was supposed to go in. She reached the house and knocked on the door, awaiting an answer. The door swung open and she smiled as she was faced with the familiar blue eyes.

“Hey Serena! We’re almost ready.” We? She came in and looked around, unsure of whom he was referring to?

“Umm… what’s going on Alex?” She followed him into the living room as she removed her jacket. He took it and smiled, flinging it over the couch and taking her hand to lead her upstairs.

“I hope you don’t mind, but I invited a few people over to study.” She looked at him suspiciously as they walked through his bedroom door to see Isabel, Max and Michael sitting on the floor. She looked at them with unbelieving eyes. There was something very wrong here.

She looked at Isabel, all smiles on the floor with her books open. Isabel had never studied for a test. Not as long as she’d known her. Max… well he wasn’t a group kind of guy. Especially not the Max before the shooting. He was much more reserved and quiet. Not having any actual reason to trust them. And Michael… he was the biggest enigma of them all. After all, he not only hated school and studying. He also hated people.

“Hey… Serena right?” Isabel smiled and stood up to shake her hand. She shook it, unsure of what to make of that display. What was happening? The world was changing right around her!

“Hi. Uh, yea. Yea. Serena Mitchell.”

“I’m Isabel.”

“Yea, Isabel Evans. I know.” She smiled, hoping to look normal, but she knew inside her whole mind was stirring. This was not how it was. Then again… nothing was how it was lately.

“Hey Serena.” Max smiled and stood, also welcoming her. She smiled in return, enjoying him as a friendly normal teenager. For a moment, she could have forgotten he was an alien from a different planet.

“Max…. Michael.” She smiled at them both and looked toward Michael as he grunted and nodded in response. Well, one thing was clear. He wasn’t there from his own will. He was there because they’d dragged him along. Or… even worse, he was there because he didn’t trust any of them and wanted to scope out the new circle of friends that Isabel and Max were suddenly embracing.

“Shall we?” Isabel smiled and sat back down, anxious to begin a study session.

“Am I late?” The voice came from the living room as Maria came barging into the room, her books in hand.

“Well… now we can start.” Alex smiled. She looked around at the picture before her. They were all together again. But none of them know anything about anything.

“This is so great! Alex this was a great idea, cause you know that Biology is like a foreign language to me.” Maria smiled and made her way down to the floor to get comfortable.
“Great.” Michael mumbled from the floor as Isabel and Max shot him a look. He looked at them completely bored as Isabel eyed him angrily.

“Problem Michael?” She said, the frustration evident in her voice.

“This is stupid.”

“It’s not like you couldn’t use some help studying Michael. You ARE failing every class.” With that he was silent and Isabel turned, her pleasant face again on them. Alex smiled in return and opened his book.

“Ok, page 207. This lesson is about the biological differences between humans and other species. So, we are discussing the structure of cells and the difference between bone and muscle structure.” He smiled and looked up as people all looked for the page, everyone gathering their notebooks and starting to take notes. Except for Michael.

“Well, the first diagram discusses the structure of a cell. So the pieces of cells, including the nucleus, the mitochondria, the cell wall, etc. Should we jot down the parts?” Isabel looked up and smiled, a glint in her eyes. She knew what she was doing. She had already been over this chapter. She knew the answers. But she wanted to let Alex tell her.

“Right. We need to write a list of the parts and their functions.” They nodded and began to write down the parts in order from the outside in. Serena looked around, her mouth into a slight smile. This was different than any meeting the six of them ever had. They were always concerned about their safety or their life or their next move. Now, they were only concerned about parts of a cell. It was… refreshing.

She began to copy down the parts and focus on the writing.

“Umm… what’s the function of the RBIs?” Everyone stopped and Michael snickered.

“RBIs?” He looked up at Maria amused and she nodded looking down into the book for the part.

“Yea… the little blue circles….” Serena smiled and looked at Maria shaking her head.

“They’re soft and hard ribonucleic cells. They help aid in enzyme production.” Max said with a smile and shook his head in response. Maria smiled and began to write it down.

“See? Was that so hard?”

“Yea princess, because RBI’s are a baseball term. Not a biology term.” She looked up at Michael with a frustrated sigh.

“Well if you know so much about science why are you here?”

“Good question.”

“Bad answer.”

“Hey I didn’t ask to come here ok?” He was getting up and the DeLuca/Guerin war was officially beginning.

“Michael!” Isabel stood, her eyes sharp like daggers. “SIT.” Her voice was final and Michael looked at her angrily. He began to sit back down and Maria snickered.

“Why don’t you make yourself useful and instead of sitting there help us study?”

“I’d rather watch you say stupid things.”

“I don’t say stupid things.”

“Cookies anyone?” Alex stood and looked at Serena, his eyes wide with amused terror. She smiled at him and nodded.

“I’d love cookies.”

“Let me help you with those.” Isabel stood up and followed Alex out of the room. She looked back at Maria and Michael who were now giving each other hate looks. She looked back down and heard his voice in her ear. She jumped, not realizing that he’d moved next to her.

“That’s not the function of the mitochondria.” She froze and looked up at him slowly, his bright golden eyes looking intensely into her blue ones.

“Oh?” She whispered as she looked into his eyes.

“It’s the powerhouse of the cell. Provides energy.” He smiled and pointed at the picture of the yellow squiggly looking thing. She nodded and wrote down what he said, trying to follow his train of thought.

“Ok got it.”

“I’m sorry about this.” He whispered.

“Why are you drawing the parts?”

“It’s how I can remember them! Will you mind your business??”

“They all look the same! How can you even tell which part is which?” She looked at Michael and Maria and rolled her eyes.

“About what?” She looked at Max and smiled but he smiled sympathetically. He knew what she was thinking.

“About them… about the whole awkwardness of the situation. Isabel and I thought that an afternoon out with new people would be fun. We didn’t know that things would get… like this.” He looked back over at them, now sitting in silence again, until the next explosion.

“Hey… I’m having a good time. And well, I can’t say that I didn’t need to study. As you see, I’m a complete idiot.”

“No you’re not. You just need some help. There’s nothing wrong with that.” He smiled and she felt her heart beat a few times faster.

“Yea… I guess you’re right. No one’s perfect.”

“Here, let me help you.” He took her book and began to look through for the definitions. She looked at him, his very presence making her feel safe. The door swung open and the smell of chocolate chip cookies filled the air.

“Cookies!” Isabel walked in with a large pan of cookies. A large smile on her face. She couldn’t remember seeing her so happy.

“And soda. We ran out of milk… sorry guys.” Alex smiled and held a large tray with cups of soda on it.

Everyone took their cookies and soda and she smiled as they all got settled in again. Another round of notes about to begin.

“Ok… now where were we?”

***

She and Maria walked home after the study session, the cool autumn air brushing against their faces.

“He is just the most arrogant, most annoying person I’ve ever met in my whole life!”

“I know Maria… I know.”

They walked, passing the downtown area as they headed to Maria’s house.

“I can never understand what possessed that man to start with me! I didn’t even do anything to deserve it! It just wasn’t fair!”

“It was nice though, cookies and soda, and studying.”

“Yea… well if that Guerin boy hadn’t been there it would’ve been much better!” They turned the corner and Serena froze. Two bodies had just crossed the street and walked into the shadows of the park. Maria continued to walk, unaware that she had stayed behind.

She looked at them, taking in their build, their stature, the way they walked. One of them she would never forget. The golden curls waving with every step, her small frame moving alongside the tall man. She held her breath. This was all too soon. Too early. Then again… she’d changed time.

“Hey… Serena. Come on!” Maria looked back and motioned for her to catch up. She took a deep breath. There was a problem. That problem was called Ed and Tess Harding.

[roswellianprincess16]

A/N: Hello! Just dropping in to drop off the new chapter. Just to clarify... in case anyone is confused, Tess and Ed are here now because since Liz didn't die, the entire time line has been changed, and basically anything can happen. So what happens now when Max doesn't have the love of his life to hold him back from them?


Chapter 7:

She looked up at the ceiling from her sleeping bag on the floor. She couldn’t sleep even if she’d wanted to. She looked at Maria’s digital clock. It read 2:30 AM. She didn’t know what she was going to do. Her head was spinning with possibilities. Everyone was beginning to get along, to be friends without the hustle and bustle of alien insanity. And now this. Now Tess Harding was in Roswell to wreck havoc on everything. She knew what would happen. She’d tell Max that she’s the fourth alien and show them the pod chamber and they’d separate themselves from the humans because Nasedo thought they were all weaknesses and they’d all become enemies….

Her mind was traveling too fast. Perhaps she was just being paranoid. This might be the one thing she had wanted. To let them just live their lives. Then again… Nasedo wasn’t exactly what she’d call ethical. He did things out of impulse and she didn’t even want to think what could happen if they were led to act that way. She didn’t want to see it.

She tried closing her eyes, tried getting some sleep. She knew she had to go to school the next day. She had to get some rest. But the image of Tess Harding continued to float in her mind. What would happen now that Max was not with Liz? Would it be easier for him to follow his destiny and be safe? The thought of Tess kissing him made her stomach churn. She’d suffered that pain before. Why would she have to be here when it happened again?

Just as she was drifting to sleep she saw it, the image flashed across her brain quickly, full of terrifying sights and sounds.

Someone was going to die.

She could see the blood and she could hear the screams. Who would it be?

***

She tried to stay awake during class, but her sleepless night forbade it. There was no way she was going to be able to focus when she knew that her job was now to stop a murder. But whose? And when? The answers continued to evade her as her eyes continued to close.

She thought of Grandma Claudia’s words.

You’re going to be put in a situation where you will have to make a very important decision. It will change you and how you look at life. But it won’t be an easy choice. And you might be the one to suffer the major consequences.

Was she going to have to die again? And actually feel it? Would she have to sacrifice her own life for someone she loved? She thought of her friends and how happy they’d been just the night before at the study session. How nice it had been to see everyone acting normal. She wouldn’t let anyone hurt them.

The bell rang loudly and she got up to step out into the hallway when she saw her. She was talking to Isabel, smiling and laughing. That’s right. She would go for Isabel first. Because she was the one she would break first. She thought of what she should do, what her actions would allow. They didn’t know her that well, but they seemed to have befriended her. How could she break to them that she knew they were aliens? She closed her eyes knowing that she only had one choice. She would only be able to trust one person.

She walked down the hallway and passed Isabel. She smiled, hoping to keep the friendly feelings between them.

“Hey Isabel.”

“Hey Serena. How’s it going?”

“Not too bad.” The girl beside her smiled, a harmless pleasant smile.

“Oh, this is Tess. She’s new here too.”

“Hello.”

“Hi.” She looked into her eyes, looking for a sign of malice. Perhaps now Tess didn’t feel threatened. After all… her mate no longer had his soulmate. There was nothing standing in her way.

“Well I’ve gotta run. I’ll see you.” She smiled and turned away, not sure what to do. So much hadn’t happened. They hadn’t found the orbs, they didn’t meet Topolsky, they didn’t know that there were alien hunters who might be looking for them. Nothing had been set in motion because Liz Parker DID die.

So how did she go about telling them that Nasedo was dangerous? That he had killed people and would do so willingly?

She walked out into the field looking for a place to sit. She needed time to think. She closed her eyes and lay back using her jacket as a pillow. She took in the afternoon sun, trying to let it relax her tense muscles. She thought of last night’s vision. So far, what she has seen has come true. Had she developed some sort of foresight with her new life? Was there a reason she was supposed to know what was to come?

She sighed loudly, feeling exhausted. It was difficult to think when her head was throbbing. She put her hand on her forehead and massaged it softly, thinking of her next move. Suddenly, she felt the shadow come upon her. She opened her eyes and looked up, trying to make out the dark figure. She looked up into a pair of dark blue eyes.

“I saw the way you looked at me.” She sat up, making sure she was seeing correctly. In front of her stood Tess, hands to her sides, her face in battle mode.

“Looked at you?”

“I sense something about you… something… different.” She leaned down and got on her knees, as their eyes met. Serena looked at her, all of the feelings about her flowing again through her veins. This woman had torn apart the most important thing in her life. But that was all the past now.

“I’m no different than you are.” She hinted, looking for a sign of amusement in Tess’ eyes. After all, she very well knew she was different. But she found none. Instead, she watched as Tess raised her eyebrows in curiosity.

“I suspected that.” She stated blatantly and then looked down. “Do you know about the rest of them?” Serena pulled back, a confused look on her face. Then she realized what she was asking. She had misunderstood. She didn’t mean she was an alien…. Then again, this could work in her favor.

“I do.” She said, keeping her heart from racing out of control. “Look… I’ll talk to them. And now that you’re here and it’s complete, I’ll get them to trust you.”

“I knew we shared a connection. I could feel it.” Tess smiled and held her hands in her own. Serena looked up, a sudden feeling of guilt over taking her. This wasn’t right. She couldn’t be one of them. Then again, shouldn’t Tess have known that? She’d been the one who had stomped back into town talking about what she knew the first time.

But now… suddenly Serena realized her power. Her foresight was not just literal… having lived as Liz Parker gave her a heads up. She knew the people and the game involved. Now she would have the power to educate them all. Any way she saw fit.

The only problem would be Nasedo. He would argue. He would see through her. So her job was to make sure she got them all to trust her first.

“Tess… you can’t tell anyone about this. Not even your protector.”

“How did you…?” Tess looked at her surprised, having just laid eyes on her for the first time that morning.

“I know things. More than you can imagine. And if things are going to go smoothly… if you’re all to form one cohesive unit… then you have to trust me. Do you know where the pod chamber is?”

“Of course.”

“Meet me there tonight at 8pm. Alone.” Tess nodded and looked at Serena uncomfortably.

“Shouldn’t he know?”

“Listen to me, something big is going to happen, something that affects all of us. You know how he handles things. Do you want someone else to die?” There was a silence and Tess looked down sadly. There was a small sigh that escaped her lips as she thought to herself and then her blue eyes looked up sadly.

“No. No, I don’t.” Serena nodded and did something not even she could understand. She hugged her.

“Tonight. 8PM. Be there.”

“I will.” With that she stood and headed back toward the school. She watched her go and stood frozen on the ground. What she just did would change everything. Now she had to go find the one person she could trust. The one person who could help her with this plan. The only person who would believe the true story of it all. Max Evans.

***

The final bell rang and she grabbed her things and ran out the door, headed in a very particular direction. She stood against the wall, waiting for him to leave the classroom, her breath feeling heavy against her lungs. This had to work. If it didn’t… it posed a threat to everything she was doing. If he didn’t believe her… things could go awfully wrong.

She counted in her head. Three…two…one; and then turned around to face him.

“Max.”

“Oh! Hi Serena.” He smiled immediately, what she hoped was a good sign, that perhaps he was happy to see her.

“I really need to talk to you. Do you have a minute?” He nodded as he looked at her worriedly. “Can we go somewhere? It’s just a little crowded here.”

She grabbed his hand as they headed out into the day and they walked side by side in silence until they reached the Jeep.

“Where do you want to go?” He looked at her curiously and she remained serious, all the while going through the steps of her plan in her head. This would work. It had to.

“Maybe we can just drive and talk.” He nodded and smiled. They drove in silence for a while, simply enjoying each other’s company. Finally, they reached the old highway and he turned to look at her for a moment.

“Serena… we’ve been on the road for like fifteen minutes. Is there something bothering you?” She looked down at her lap, brushed a piece of hair from her face and continued to look down, pensive and frightened.

“Max… everyone here has been very nice to me. They’ve welcomed me and taken care of me in ways that have made me rethink life and my purpose here. But as much as I love what I’ve gotten. I’m different Max.”

He drove, and she watched as he stiffened slightly, his fingers taking a stronger grasp on the wheel.

“What I’m saying is that… I feel a special connection to you Max.” She looked at him for a moment, seeing his jawline tense. Maybe this was wrong. Too soon. Too raw.

“I know how you felt about Liz…” He turned to look at her then and got off the highway onto a dirt road. He pulled over onto the shoulder and turned the car off, his eyes looking straight ahead, his body stiff.

“Please say something.”

“I never knew Liz well enough… to feel what I thought I would… what I know I would have felt.” He turned to look at her now, his eyes open and expressive, with no intent of hiding his thoughts or feelings. “I don’t know why… it goes against everything I’ve spent my whole life doing… but I trust you Serena.”

“Then you feel it too, don’t you? The connection?” She looked up at him suddenly, a rush of excitement filling her. Perhaps with his help, things would work out.

“I don’t know what it is. I just know it’s different. Different from anything else I’ve ever felt.”

They sat in silence for a few moments and she looked up, unsure of where to take it.

“Max… the day Liz Parker died… things went very wrong.” She looked at him and watched as his eyes slowly came up to reach hers, a sudden careful look covering his face.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean… she wasn’t supposed to die that day.”

“I don’t understand. It was an accident… things happen….”

“I know that. But in my world, things went very differently.”

“Your world?” He looked at her curiously now, his body distancing itself slightly from her. He was beginning to panic. He didn’t understand.

“Ok. I know this is really weird for you Max. I… I’m not really Serena Mitchell.” She held her breath and suddenly realized what it must have been like for him to tell her the truth that day in the band room. It must have been terrifying.

“You’re not?”

“Well… I am… but not really.”

“Ok… umm… well are you or aren’t you?”

“I guess there’s no easy way to say this. Max… I’m from the future.” He looked at her for a moment and then his face turned from complete confusion to a smile.

“Serena… are you ok?” He reached his hand over to touch her shoulder and she felt ridiculous. She must sound insane.

“What? Is it so hard to believe? I mean… I’m from the future and you’re….” She stopped suddenly, her words cut short. She couldn’t finish her sentence.

“I’m what?”

“Nothing… I just… I… I’m just trying to say that….”

“I’m WHAT Serena?” He stared into her eyes, his own eyes full of anxiety and fear.

“I… I know about you. About you and Michael and Isabel.” She stopped, her hands tightly on the chair, her eyes now looking deeply into his. Her breathing was ragged, her fear beginning to grip her. He simply stared at her, his face blank. What was he thinking, feeling under there? His eyes held hers as she looked and realized that there had been no cars on the road for a few minutes. He could kill her out here if he wanted to. A bit of a random thought… then again… there had been this experience with Nasedo….

“That’s impossible.” He whispered finally, never taking his eyes off hers. They were both terrified and she could feel it. The tension was mounting.

“Max…I….” She looked down again, her eyes searching for a place to settle comfortably. Then he did something she never could have expected. He grabbed her face and leaned in and kissed her.

[roswellianprincess16]

Chapter 8:

She froze in place, his lips touching hers softly. She couldn’t believe what was happening. She closed her eyes tightly, willing herself back. It was dark at night and she was Liz Parker sitting in a broken down truck with Max Evans after having escaped the white room. She believed it with every being in her body. Suddenly, she wanted nothing more than to have that back. To get her memories back. Every kiss, every hug, every glance was gone. It had never happened. It never existed. The very thought made her want to cry.

Then suddenly, she felt it. The strong rush of flashes filling her mind. She tried to fight them but couldn’t hold them off.

She was walking around in the back corner of the Crashdown as Maria headed to serve the next table. The fighting got louder and suddenly the sound of shattered glass scared her. She looked over towards the table and watched as the two men argued. Then it was as if it all became slow motion. She watched as one pulled out a gun. The other wrestled with him, tried to take it away from him. Instead, the gun went off.

All she heard was a scream.

“Liz!” The pain was unbearable. She felt incredibly exhausted all of a sudden. The need to sleep becoming overwhelming. She tried to figure out where the wound was. She knew she should try and apply pressure if she was bleeding. But she too tired. She would just sleep. She heard some faint commotion as she began to blank out.

Then there was a voice.

“Liz. Liz? You have to look at me. You have to look at me.” She tried to open her eyes, to see where the voice was coming from. She managed to squint slightly, catching a glimpse of beautiful dark depths. He watched him above her and suddenly felt an intense heat on her skin. Her entire body tingled and then she shook. Her mind felt like it was swirling, like it was on a different plane of existence leaving her body behind. Then she felt the tingle again and shook a bit more violently this time. Then suddenly, it was as if time came rushing back to her and she was tossed back into reality. She breathed in sharply, a rough ragged breath and saw the face of the man before her.

“You’re alright now. You’re alright.” She tried looking around, trying to regain her composure. She’s just lost brackets of time and didn’t know what was happening.

“You broke the bottle and you fell. You spilled ketchup on yourself. Don’t say anything, please.” With that he stood up and ran off and she stood to watch him run.

“Liz… are you ok?” Maria spoke but it was as if she couldn’t hear her. She couldn’t see anything but the face of the man who had just saved her life. Max Evans.

* * * * *
She heard the voice coming from the bottom of the balcony. When she reached the edge she saw his face and felt her heart skip. Why was he here?

“Liz, I have to talk to you.”

They walked into the CrashDown as she turned to look at him.

“I can’t imagine how you must feel right now. I mean, I’ve thought about telling you a thousand times.”

“You have? Me?” He laughed and she looked around, unsure of what could possibly be so funny. “What?”

“Sorry. I just keep picturing you in that dress with the cupcakes on it.”

“What?”

“Forget it, it was a long time ago.”

“Oh my God… that’s right. I can’t believe I actually wore that thing!” She stopped, her eyes suddenly widening in revelation. It wasn’t possible that he knew what he had just claimed to know. She looked up into his eyes, a sudden confusion in her eyes.

“I had that dress in kindergarden. I didn’t know you until the third grade.”

“No… I don’t read minds. But when I healed you, I got this… I don’t know, this connection… and I got this rush of images.”
* * * * *

“I’ve never tried this before, but maybe I can make the connection go the other way. So you can see, you know? That I’m still me.”

She nodded, a certain fear and excitement flowing through her veins like electricity.

“I have to touch you.” She nodded, her breathing becoming nervous. His eyes were intensely focused on hers. There was such a beauty, such a soulfulness to them. She felt lost.

“Now take deep breaths. Try to let your mind blank out.” She let the images over take her, the feelings buried deep inside of the beautiful man before her. She let his loneliness overtake her, his passion, and his lust. She saw herself through his eyes… and in his eyes, she was beautiful.

* * * * *

“I just wish I could’ve stopped you from saving my life that day at the CrashDown.”

“Don’t say that.”

“Max, the day you saved my life. Your life just… ended.”

* * * * *

“No one should have to walk alone.” He watched her as she walked beside him, her eyes focused on her feet, her bright red hair falling onto her milky white freckled cheek. She reached up and tucked it behind her ear and continued to walk, thoroughly focused on the ground. He felt his heart skip, the movement had belonged to one woman, one woman he had watched very closely.

He looked away, afraid that he would be intrusive, but could not refrain from looking back. After all, she was a total stranger and yet there was something about her he knew very intimately. He tried to place the feeling, but couldn’t for his life understand it.

* * * * *

“No one should have to sit alone.” He smiled as he approached her. He had been watching her for a few minutes, focused on her book, writing furiously inside of it. He watched as the sun fell upon her hair, causing a slight glow to make it look like fire. He smiled, thinking how odd it was that she seemed to be making what he’d deemed a ‘Liz expression.’ Then again, there was a lot about her that seemed familiar. And so much about her that was new and exiting.

“What are you doing out here so early?” She smiled and put her things down to talk to him and then she moved over and made room. Surprisingly, he wanted nothing more than to sit next to her.

She felt him pull away from the kiss, the images still floating around in his mind. Something monumental had just happened. Just moments ago, as he kissed her, she had allowed her memories to flood into him. Then she was surprised with his memories. But these memories didn’t involve Liz Parker. They involved a certain red head with bright blue eyes. She kept her eyes closed for a moment, savoring the images and feelings he’d created in her. He was admiring her from afar. Comparing her to Liz Parker, at least at first. But then he did something else. Then he decided he wanted to explore her. Who she was now. Serena Mitchell. She opened her eyes to be met with bright gold depths. She swallowed hard, their eyes simply glued to each other.

“How… how do you explain that?” He asked, the intensity never leaving his face.

“I can’t. I never have been able to. All I know is that what we have… it’s special.”

“But you’re not Liz.” For a moment she froze, the words seeming almost like a stab to the heart. “So how is it that we still have this connection?”

“I’m here to bring her back to you.”

“What?”

“I have to make sure that I get back to my time. Where I’m from… I AM Liz Parker.” He stared at her for a moment… his eyes becoming wide at her words.

“But….”

“But right now I’m here to get that life back. I made a mistake thinking that I could make your life better if I’d just died. And the truth is… I think I was right. Max, you have started making friends, you’re telling jokes, you’re laughing. You’re not running from the FBI or the Special Unit or alien hunters. And that’s because Liz Parker is dead. But letting her die… letting me die… has brought on a whole world that I don’t recognize. And what I’ve realized is… I can’t help you alone.”

He stared at her, her eyes watering in her desperation. She pleaded with her eyes for him to believe her. He’d just felt it. They connected. He had to believe her.

“Why do I need help? And why me? Why not Alex or Maria?”

“Because Max… I trust you. And I know that together we can make this right.”

“What?”

“There is a fourth alien in town. Her name is Tess Harding. She’s going to tell you things that are going to be hard to listen to. But… promise me, promise me Max that no matter what happens after today, you won’t block us out. Any of us. Remember the way you feel when you’re with Alex and Maria and I. Don’t let your other half cloud it.”

“My other half?”

“Your alien half.”

***

They reached the rock formation and stepped out of the Jeep, her eyes focused on the place he had told her so much about. She had never actually seen it inside, but she was aware of the magnitude of the place. She walked up with him and they reached a flat land when suddenly the earth rumbled and the rock slid open, exposing a cave. He looked at her, a look of sudden worry, and she nodded and smiled, reassuring him that it was alright. He walked in and took her hand to reassure she’d follow. Suddenly, they were standing within an eerie blue cave with green lights. He turned and looked at the circular pods against the wall. He closed his eyes and touched the cold metal between them.

“You remember, don’t you?” Tess walked in from the shadows and startled him out of his reverie. He looked up at her face, and it was as if he suddenly recognized her. He walked up to her, his eyes taking in every inch of her face.

“You.”

“Yes. I was the last one. You were all gone when I was born.” She smiled and Serena looked on in complete surprise. She suddenly felt incredibly out of place. Incredibly intrusive.

“How did you find us?”

“We’ve been looking everywhere.”

“We?”

“There’s someone I think you should meet.” Suddenly, out of the darkness came a shadow. Then, Ed Harding stood before them.

“It is a pleasure to finally find you.” He smiled, that neutral smile that never betrayed his true emotions. Serena watched, unsure of what direction she was sending the world. A sudden fear gripped her. If she ruined this… would she be allow to return home?

“I’m Max Evans.”

“I am your protector. I have been searching for you all for a long time.”

“Why?”

“It is a very long story. One that I’d prefer you ALL were here to listen to.” He turned his face and looked at Serena dead on. She froze for a moment, his dark eyes gluing her to the wall.

“Who is she? And why is she here?”

“She’s with me.” Max looked at her and then back at the two figures before him. He watched as Tess’ brows furrowed in confusion.

“Well, that’s impossible.”

“What do you mean?”

“She can’t be with you.”

“Why not?”

“Because she’s human.” There was a silence and a tension that rose within the space.

“Look… I know that you’ve been looking for us for a long time. And… I can’t say that I’m not curious. But… this life is all I know. I don’t know anything else.”

“Look within you Max. You’ll remember.”

“Remember what?” He looked at her sadly, knowing that he was probably far from what they expected.

“Our lives. When you were king… and I… I was your bride.” Serena watched, the scene striking her. She was his bride. They were DESTINED to be together. This is why she was here. The kiss had sent her mind spiraling. She’d lost focus. She needed to make sure they ended up together. There would be no other way to save them.

“She must go.” Nasedo stepped up and stood before her. She looked up at him, her eyes recognizing his darkness. She had been with him once. She knew how evil he truly was under there.

“I pose no threat. I won’t say anything.”

“You’re a human that already knows too much.”

“She helped get him here. He trusts her.”

“She’s no one!” Nasedo’s loud voice boomed against the rock walls. “We are a unit. It is us. No one else. These types of connections make you weak. They are dangerous.”

“Nasedo….” She began and immediately regretted it.

“What did you just call me?” He turned to look at her, his eyes slanted in pure evil.

“I….”

“Where did you hear that name?”

“I just….”

“No one has called me that in years.” He towered before her, his presence large and terrifying.

“I was sent here to help.”

“Help? Sent?! By whom?”

“By our people.”

“OUR people?”

“Yes.”

“Then how is it that you are human?” She looked around, a sudden panic embracing her.

“I can’t explain it. But I know things. I know that there are agents looking to find the aliens in Roswell. There are alien hunters, hoping to find the one who leaves the silver handprint behind.” His eyes narrowed as he looked at her. Suddenly, Max appeared behind her.

“Hey! Hey leave her alone! If it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t even be listening to you both. She’s the reason I came here tonight.” She looked up anxiously as Nasedo moved back, giving her room to move. She looked at him and then back at Tess who was looking at her apologetically. She’d obviously been part of several frightening confrontations with Mr. Harding. Serena stepped outside, eager to get some air. Seconds later, she saw Max, right behind her.

“I’m sorry about that. I… I didn’t know.”

“Please… don’t apologize. I shouldn’t have brought you here. Maybe… maybe it’s too early.”

“You’re just shaken up. Wait here. I’ll get the car.” He rubbed her arms a few times and then ran down the hill and headed towards the car.

She took a deep breath and leaned up against the rock trying to take it all in. She could hear the hushed whispers within the cave. She had set something into motion. Something that could potentially be disastrous.

“What was she talking about? What silver handprint?”

“She shouldn’t know what she knows. She’s an enemy.”

“She isn’t! Why would she help me? Or Max? She’s a friend I can feel it..”

“You’re letting your emotions get the best of you. It is the four of you and no one else. There is no one you can trust out there Tess. Remember what I told you? About what they did to me in the white room? Do you ever want that to happen to you? Or Michael or Isabel or Max?”

“No… no.” She whispered, her voice shaking and terrified.

“Then you NEVER trust anyone but each other. Do you understand me? And I don’t trust her.”

“Well… there’s nothing we can do now….”

“There is.” There was a silence and Serena felt the air catch in her breath. “We’re going to have to kill her.”

[roswellianprincess16]

A/N: Might not be able to post a new chpt tomorrow, but seeing as how many haven't come and read these yet, I think it'll be alright. I'll be out all day today, got tons of things to do. So until then, here is the new chapter.

Chapter 9:

She spent the night in a blank, trying to take in everything that happened. This morning she found herself still in another world, her mind wandering at the words that still floated in her ears.

We’re going to have to kill her.

His voice rang in her ears, the frighteningly calm voice of Ed Harding. She thought of Max and Isabel and Michael. She wasn’t even sure if after this went down she’d be able to return to her old life. She hadn’t realized it until now, but the truth is, she had no way of knowing that time would warp back and she’d be dropped back into her life with Max Evans. She could be stuck in this situation forever. She looked down at her feet as she walked through the halls at West Roswell High. She felt like she was watching her life slip right before her. And now she was going to die. She didn’t know when or where but she knew it would happen. And of course, she had seen it.

She stopped before her locker and closed her eyes. She was exhausted. She hadn’t slept well in two days and it was taking its toll.

“Serena?” She was startled by the voice behind her and she turned, surprised to find that the person was Isabel Evans.

“Hey.” She took a deep breath and watched as Isabel eyed her for a moment.

“Can we talk?”

“I actually have class in a second….”

“Please.” She looked at her desperation. It was obvious that Isabel had something on her mind.

“Ok.” She closed her locker and followed Isabel into the eraser room. They looked around and closed the door behind them. “So what’s this all about?”

Isabel stood facing the door, her back to Serena as she heard her sigh loudly.

“I spoke to Max this morning.” She looked at her body language, trying to decipher how Isabel was feeling. She turned to face her now, their eyes meeting for a moment, a certain openness between the two of them.

“Isabel…”

“Why did you tell him? Why did you risk it?” There was a short silence as Serena thought of how to word her feelings.

“For the first time, Isabel, I understand what it feels like to be in your shoes. To be alone and confused and terrified and need answers and have no one to turn to. To want nothing than to go back to being normal. I know that feeling. And I didn’t want that to happen to you.” Her eyes watered as she looked up and noticed Isabel’s own eyes full of emotion.

“I don’t understand what’s happening.”

“Neither do I.”

“But I want to be your friend. I want to let Alex and Maria into my life. I can’t explain the way I felt when we were together. A sense of completion I’ve never felt before. And for a moment it terrified me to know that I could be happy if I just let myself go and opened up to you all. But then I realized that it was worth it. That a life alone isn’t a real life.”

She looked into Isabel’s eyes. There was a maturity to her that she hadn’t seen those first few months. She stepped closer to her and put her hand on her arm, trying to comfort her and trying to comfort herself.

“Isabel I need you to know that I want nothing for happiness for all of you. I would NEVER do anything to hurt you guys. I mean… if you only knew the things we all went through.”

“It was a horrible life?” Isabel looked up trying to understand.

“No. It was a wonderful life. A life full of laughs and tears, full of excitement and terror, full of friendship and love. And I gave it up because I thought that one terrible moment wasn’t worth it. But I was wrong… life can never be the same without us all together.” She watched as Isabel’s eyes watered and they embraced for a moment, an unspoken connection forming between them.

“Serena, you’re in danger.”

“What?” She pulled away from the hug and looked up at Isabel, her eyes full of confusion.

“Tess came to me this morning before school and told me that our protector is dangerous. I think he’s planning on… getting rid of you.” Isabel looked down nervously, her eyes full of anxiety. Serena grabbed her hand and squeezed tightly.

“I’m not afraid any more.”

“But what if…?”

“Listen to me. It’s going to happen no matter what we do. I’ve already had a vision.”

“A vision?”

“I see things. Future things.” She looked around nervously, realizing how ridiculous it all sounded.

“Oh.” Isabel looked at her suspiciously and then smiled. “It’s good to know that you’ve got gifts as well.”

“Well… they come and go when they please. I don’t know how to control them.”

“We’re not going to let anything happen to you. We’ll have someone with you at all times and we’ll figure something out. We’re powerful together. We won’t let him hurt you.” Isabel smiled and then Serena nodded, wiping away at the dried tears on her face.

“We have to get to class, before anyone realizes we’re both missing. After fourth period, meet Alex and Maria at lunch as usual, Michael is going to join you there.”

“Michael? Are you sure?”

“Max, Tess and I are going back to the pod chamber to see if we can figure something out. We’ll be back before lunch is over. Then after school, we’re all going to eat at our house, Mom already knows we’re having friends over and she’s ecstatic. She’s going to be cooking a big lunch and we’re under the guise of studying. Then tonight, Max will walk you and Maria home.”

“Don’t you think Maria and Alex are going to catch on? Realize how odd this all is?”

“No.”

“No?”

“Alex and Maria already know. We approached them this morning before homeroom and told them we needed their help to save your life. Maria is still freaked… you might want to talk to her. Alex… well I’m not sure I know what he’s thinking. So talk to him too.”

“Right….” She tried to take in all the information. Isabel had allowed them to be exposed in order to save her. She thought of the reactions of Maria and Alex the first time around. She smiled, wondering what it would be like now.

“Ok, see you later.” With that Isabel slipped out of the room and clunked down the hallway to class.

***

“Serena!” She stopped when she heard Maria’s voice. This was going to be interesting.

“Maria.” She turned around with a smile and saw her wild expression.

“Don’t you Maria me. We were right and you know it. Alex saw it, I saw it, Grandma Claudia saw it and you lied and said it wasn’t true.”

“Maria I was just trying to help… trying to keep you from grieving.”

“And now this! This whole… alien thing.” She whispered the last words, her eyes looking around wildly.

“Maria… don’t say that word. Ok? Now, you out of all people should know that not everything is what it seems.”

“Yea but… well argh! Who would have thought it was true?”

“Ladies.” Alex walked in and wrapped his arm around the both of them.

“I hate how you’re so calm about this.”

“I just got two major theories proven to me in a week. Reincarnation and the existence of extra terrestrials. I can die a happy man.”

“Alex, you can’t say anything.”

“Oh come, like anyone would believe me. I think I’m losing it myself.”

“Hey!” Michael walked up behind them and Maria rolled her eyes.

“Oh great. Like it’s not enough that we have to deal with your existence but now we have to spend time with you too?”

“If you don’t like it you can go off by yourself. Maybe some enemy alien will find you and zap you into a smaller one celled organism. Not that you’d know the difference, seeing how you thought our cells had RBIs.”

“Will you just DROP that already? Geez… can’t a girl make one mistake?”

“This is going to be fun.” Alex smiled sarcastically and Serena laughed and nodded in return.

They sat and began to eat lunch, finally in silence and she looked up to see Michael looking at her.

“What?”

“I just don’t understand this whole thing.”

“Yea, well I’m about as lost as you are.”

“How do you know what you know then?”

“I came from the future… but now this is a second life… with a different future ahead. So I don’t know what’s going to happen.”

“What happened in your future?” He asked, his curiosity obviously getting the best of him.

Serena looked at them all and smirked. This could work to her advantage.

“We did wonderful things. We fought off the FBI who came to infiltrate in Roswell, we found an Indian chief called River Dog that told us that he’d met your protector and you discovered a map in a cave written with your language.”

Michael looked on in interested awe. Maria seemed pretty wrapped up as well, the story seeming almost fictional, almost impossible.

“And you and Maria were lovers… intense and passionate lovers and she helped you through your ordeal with your foster father.”

“WHAT? We were WHAT?! No… no no no. You must have been living in an alternate very Twilight Zone reality because Michael and I? No. It just… it wouldn’t happen.”

“Shut up for a second. What about my foster father?”

“You declared yourself independent of him and got your own apartment. In order to avoid any more… confrontations.”

“Ok back to me and Michael. Right… yea… umm when you say passionate and intense what exactly do you mean?” Maria stared at Serena, her face full of disbelief.

“I mean, you guys basically started off all the pairings.”

“Pairings?” Alex looked at her curiously and she smiled. “Yea… Max and Liz, Maria and Michael, and Alex… you and Isabel did a bit of a dance. But it took a while to develop.”

“Nice!” Alex smiled and grabbed his sandwich to take a big bite.

“I can’t believe this. Figures. Figures! And now you’re here and we have to save you from dying!”

“Will you lower your voice? Do you want the whole world to hear you?”

“Well I am in a panic here ok?! And no one is doing anything to calm me down!”

“Maybe because we’re sick of listening to you!”

“My life has just been turned upside down! I am just…” And then he grabbed her and he kissed her. Serena smiled and looked at Alex who was shaking his head in amused disgust.

“Oh geez….”

“That was to calm you down.”

Suddenly, a cell phone rang and Alex went scrounging for Maria’s phone.

“Hello? Oh… ok. No problem. See you then.”

Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at Alex.

“Well who was it?” Maria cried out, his look betraying his silence.

“It was Isabel. They said they found something that they might be able to use. We’ll talk about it after school.”

Serena looked down at her hands wondering what it could be. She only hoped it wouldn’t be too late when they figured out a plan.