<center>KIRA</center>
“What kind of things?”
“Things from your past.” I say lightly. I always hate answering this question because the answer always provokes more questions. I’m not very good at answering questions as you might be able to tell “I saw what you saw during the war. I saw the people that you were able to help and I also saw the people you couldn’t. It wasn’t your fault that they died, Alex.”
I give him a couple of moments to consider by words before I continue, “I saw your life on Janos. Your time here was probably a lot worse then mine. I’m sorry about your parents. No child should have to witness what you did. You couldn’t have saved them, Alex.
“How do you know that? There is something I could have done... and I just froze.”
“What could you have done, Alex? You were just a child.” I state as calmly as possible. My heart is breaking for him. For years, he has carried around this guilt. I’m not sure how I can help him. Its something that he really needs to come to realize by himself. “I don’t think you should stay cooped up in here all day. Come and eat with me.”
Rise of The Phoenix [MATURE-AU-CC]
Moderators: Anniepoo98, ISLANDGIRL5, Forum Moderators
<center>Alex</center>
”Things from your past,”
Those four little words are enough to make me unsteady, I clutch onto the table for support. I don’t wish to start thinking about my past. The war was hard enough without the thoughts of how torturous the time was before it. When she begins to tell me how she saw me during the war I instantly feel sick. She saw all the lives I wasn’t able to save, how sick with guilt I was. How horrible I am that so many died on my watch.
When she tells me she saw my life on Janos I feel my cheeks flush, I don’t want her to know about those things. My parents… I have tried to block out what happened to them, it’s just too hard. I couldn’t save them, I stood by and watched. I froze, stood there motionless, tears running down my face as they slaughtered them. It was almost as if they saw my parents as nothing… worth nothing… flies on a wall. My instincts are instructing me to cover my ears and ignore the words coming forth from Kira’s mouth.
“How do you know that? There is something I could have done… and I just froze.” I exclaim when she announces it wasn’t my fault. It was! I could have done something, stopped it somehow, and saved them! It is why I became a doctor. I never wanted to be helpless in a situation like that again… but during the war so many died and I could do nothing to stop it. I am hopeless, useless.
“I could have done something besides stand there! I was frozen to the spot, I could have stopped it.” I choke on my words and force myself to take a deep breath. This is hard so when she suggests going to get something to eat with her I am thankful for the change of topic and nod. “Let’s go.” I say my voice empty as I move past her on my way through the door.
”Things from your past,”
Those four little words are enough to make me unsteady, I clutch onto the table for support. I don’t wish to start thinking about my past. The war was hard enough without the thoughts of how torturous the time was before it. When she begins to tell me how she saw me during the war I instantly feel sick. She saw all the lives I wasn’t able to save, how sick with guilt I was. How horrible I am that so many died on my watch.
When she tells me she saw my life on Janos I feel my cheeks flush, I don’t want her to know about those things. My parents… I have tried to block out what happened to them, it’s just too hard. I couldn’t save them, I stood by and watched. I froze, stood there motionless, tears running down my face as they slaughtered them. It was almost as if they saw my parents as nothing… worth nothing… flies on a wall. My instincts are instructing me to cover my ears and ignore the words coming forth from Kira’s mouth.
“How do you know that? There is something I could have done… and I just froze.” I exclaim when she announces it wasn’t my fault. It was! I could have done something, stopped it somehow, and saved them! It is why I became a doctor. I never wanted to be helpless in a situation like that again… but during the war so many died and I could do nothing to stop it. I am hopeless, useless.
“I could have done something besides stand there! I was frozen to the spot, I could have stopped it.” I choke on my words and force myself to take a deep breath. This is hard so when she suggests going to get something to eat with her I am thankful for the change of topic and nod. “Let’s go.” I say my voice empty as I move past her on my way through the door.
<center>KIRA</center>
“I could have done something besides stand there! I was frozen to the spot, I could have stopped it.” He chokes out the words and my heart breaks a little more for him. I wish I knew how to make him understand. He’s never going to be able to move on if he doesn’t learn to let go of the past.
“Alex…” I reach out to him but he moves out of my reach. I let my hand fall back to my side and watch helplessly as Alex tries to regain some control.
“Let’s go.”
He’s gone before I can say another word. I hope that being around the people who love him will help ease the pain today. Maybe I should have a quick word with Isabel. I know that she cares a lot about Alex. She might be able to get through to him. I don’t want to see him suffer anymore. He deserves some happiness in his life at last.
I follow behind him to the kitchen. His shoulders are still tense and I wish that I had used a more subtle approach. I was a fool to go blurting all those things out. What did I expect? Its going to take Alex time to recover from his past.
When I enter the kitchen, the first thing I notice is the beautiful blonde sat at the table. I grin at her as I grab some food from the side.
“Good morning, Isabel.” I say as I sit down beside her. “Why aren’t you out and about with Max this morning? Don’t tell me that he left without you again.”
“I could have done something besides stand there! I was frozen to the spot, I could have stopped it.” He chokes out the words and my heart breaks a little more for him. I wish I knew how to make him understand. He’s never going to be able to move on if he doesn’t learn to let go of the past.
“Alex…” I reach out to him but he moves out of my reach. I let my hand fall back to my side and watch helplessly as Alex tries to regain some control.
“Let’s go.”
He’s gone before I can say another word. I hope that being around the people who love him will help ease the pain today. Maybe I should have a quick word with Isabel. I know that she cares a lot about Alex. She might be able to get through to him. I don’t want to see him suffer anymore. He deserves some happiness in his life at last.
I follow behind him to the kitchen. His shoulders are still tense and I wish that I had used a more subtle approach. I was a fool to go blurting all those things out. What did I expect? Its going to take Alex time to recover from his past.
When I enter the kitchen, the first thing I notice is the beautiful blonde sat at the table. I grin at her as I grab some food from the side.
“Good morning, Isabel.” I say as I sit down beside her. “Why aren’t you out and about with Max this morning? Don’t tell me that he left without you again.”
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FaithfulAngel24
- Roswell Fanatic
- Posts: 2594
- Joined: Fri Jan 28, 2005 1:34 am
- Location: Alabama for now, but someday I'll be on a beach in Morocco
- Contact:
*Isabel*
I am just sitting at the table enjoying a nice piece of toast when Kira and Alex enter. I can’t quite explain it but it feels like every time that man comes near me I rotate completely off center, but only in the best possible way of course. It’s like my whole body comes alive and yet I don’t know how to deal with it properly. A courtship between us could never be. We are vastly different and I fear there’s a darkness deep within me that he could never touch. Let alone understand.
I always feel like I hurt the people I care about by just being with them. Foolish notion I guess but it forces me to be a bit of an outsider even among the crew whom I consider to be family. Still there’s a small part of me that wishes things could be different. That I could be the sort of girl that Alex would like. I am drawn out of these childish fantasies when Kira takes a seat beside me and says good naturedly, “Good morning, Isabel.” I flash her a warm friendly smile.
I‘ve always liked the tough brunette. She doesn‘t let her kick ass attitude keep her from being one of the nicest people I know. She‘s the ultimate paradox ,but that‘s what makes her so lovely. “Why aren’t you out and about with Max this morning? Don’t tell me that he left without you again.” She continues with a teasing glimmer in her eye. “You know my brother. He’s always the first to rise while I myself like to get my beauty sleep.” I reply with a slight chuckle.
He’s always aggravating me about the long lazy hours that I spend laid up in the bed while I consider a measly 6 hours to be rather short. I give a slight wave of the hand for emphasis before continuing, “Besides he knows that I’ll always swoop in at the last possible moment and save him from whatever mess he‘s gotten himself into. He likes the adrenaline. It gives him a bit of a rush I think. I wouldn’t want to deprive him of that. Now would I?” I question with a slight shake of the head.
Turning my gaze to Alex I inquire, "I trust the morning has served you well?" I feel a slight flutter in my stomach as his eyes reluctantly meet mine. I fear my resistance will never be distance enough.
I am just sitting at the table enjoying a nice piece of toast when Kira and Alex enter. I can’t quite explain it but it feels like every time that man comes near me I rotate completely off center, but only in the best possible way of course. It’s like my whole body comes alive and yet I don’t know how to deal with it properly. A courtship between us could never be. We are vastly different and I fear there’s a darkness deep within me that he could never touch. Let alone understand.
I always feel like I hurt the people I care about by just being with them. Foolish notion I guess but it forces me to be a bit of an outsider even among the crew whom I consider to be family. Still there’s a small part of me that wishes things could be different. That I could be the sort of girl that Alex would like. I am drawn out of these childish fantasies when Kira takes a seat beside me and says good naturedly, “Good morning, Isabel.” I flash her a warm friendly smile.
I‘ve always liked the tough brunette. She doesn‘t let her kick ass attitude keep her from being one of the nicest people I know. She‘s the ultimate paradox ,but that‘s what makes her so lovely. “Why aren’t you out and about with Max this morning? Don’t tell me that he left without you again.” She continues with a teasing glimmer in her eye. “You know my brother. He’s always the first to rise while I myself like to get my beauty sleep.” I reply with a slight chuckle.
He’s always aggravating me about the long lazy hours that I spend laid up in the bed while I consider a measly 6 hours to be rather short. I give a slight wave of the hand for emphasis before continuing, “Besides he knows that I’ll always swoop in at the last possible moment and save him from whatever mess he‘s gotten himself into. He likes the adrenaline. It gives him a bit of a rush I think. I wouldn’t want to deprive him of that. Now would I?” I question with a slight shake of the head.
Turning my gaze to Alex I inquire, "I trust the morning has served you well?" I feel a slight flutter in my stomach as his eyes reluctantly meet mine. I fear my resistance will never be distance enough.
Love is not finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. Looking for a little magic? Practical Enchantment
<center>Alex</center>
My pulse quickens as we reach the kitchen because sitting at the table is Isabel. She looks gorgeous but then she always does to me. My mouth is suddenly dry and I can’t think of anything to say. Luckily Kira takes over, I’m not in the best of moods and so anything I might say could come out sounding sour. I feel horrible that I’m reacting this way; I know I’m scowling and poor Kira probably thinks I’m angry with her. I’m glad she’s told me; okay that’s not completely true but even so.
There isn’t a whole lot going through my mind as I lean casually against the wall and fold my arms over my chest. I’m not really sure what I’m even still doing here. I should probably go see what Max is up to. I can’t though; I can’t leave the ship while Isabel isn’t with me. I know it sounds pathetic but something about her presences comforts me, it eases the inner turmoil and gives me a sense of peace. I know incredibly lame but honestly without her around I think I might completely sink into the dark pit.
I turn my gaze to the floor, it’s hard but I do it. I’d rather not be caught staring at her, it’d be terribly embarrassing. They seem to be getting on which is just great for them and I feel even more awkward just standing here. Right now I feel as if I can’t take this, I don’t want to face anyone or anything. I just want to go back to my bed and stay there until we leave this planet. Its stupid and cowardly but when I’m here I feel like I’m suffocating or like I’m going to fall apart.
“I trust the morning has served you well?
Reluctantly I return my gaze to her, I know it makes me feel calm but it also makes me feel dizzy. Captured by her beauty I force a smile and nod, “It’s been quite an interesting morning,” I reply and run a hand through my hair roughly. “And you? How are you getting on this morning?”
My pulse quickens as we reach the kitchen because sitting at the table is Isabel. She looks gorgeous but then she always does to me. My mouth is suddenly dry and I can’t think of anything to say. Luckily Kira takes over, I’m not in the best of moods and so anything I might say could come out sounding sour. I feel horrible that I’m reacting this way; I know I’m scowling and poor Kira probably thinks I’m angry with her. I’m glad she’s told me; okay that’s not completely true but even so.
There isn’t a whole lot going through my mind as I lean casually against the wall and fold my arms over my chest. I’m not really sure what I’m even still doing here. I should probably go see what Max is up to. I can’t though; I can’t leave the ship while Isabel isn’t with me. I know it sounds pathetic but something about her presences comforts me, it eases the inner turmoil and gives me a sense of peace. I know incredibly lame but honestly without her around I think I might completely sink into the dark pit.
I turn my gaze to the floor, it’s hard but I do it. I’d rather not be caught staring at her, it’d be terribly embarrassing. They seem to be getting on which is just great for them and I feel even more awkward just standing here. Right now I feel as if I can’t take this, I don’t want to face anyone or anything. I just want to go back to my bed and stay there until we leave this planet. Its stupid and cowardly but when I’m here I feel like I’m suffocating or like I’m going to fall apart.
“I trust the morning has served you well?
Reluctantly I return my gaze to her, I know it makes me feel calm but it also makes me feel dizzy. Captured by her beauty I force a smile and nod, “It’s been quite an interesting morning,” I reply and run a hand through my hair roughly. “And you? How are you getting on this morning?”
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Dying_Hearts
- Enthusiastic Roswellian
- Posts: 17
- Joined: Fri Jul 07, 2006 5:24 pm
MAX
"Max, hey you do realize we need some new parts right? I have a list for you."
I hear Aphrodite call to me. She's like a baby sister to me. To all the crew. We look out for, even if she hates it. But it's what our almost family does. Look out for one another.
I haven't taken the list from her out stretched-hand when I get another lecture on: "Everything there is all EQUALLY important, remember that ok."
I give a sharp nod and a gruff sound to indicate my awareness, and then look to the list. It's fairly long in terms of needs, but if the Phoenix needs it to rise, then I guess I better go find some odd jobs to do. I think the Phoenix would have blown up long ago, if we didn't have the best mechanic on board.
"I'll get you ALL of them. Don't worry."
"Max, hey you do realize we need some new parts right? I have a list for you."
I hear Aphrodite call to me. She's like a baby sister to me. To all the crew. We look out for, even if she hates it. But it's what our almost family does. Look out for one another.
I haven't taken the list from her out stretched-hand when I get another lecture on: "Everything there is all EQUALLY important, remember that ok."
I give a sharp nod and a gruff sound to indicate my awareness, and then look to the list. It's fairly long in terms of needs, but if the Phoenix needs it to rise, then I guess I better go find some odd jobs to do. I think the Phoenix would have blown up long ago, if we didn't have the best mechanic on board.
"I'll get you ALL of them. Don't worry."
<center>
Underneath it All
</center>
Underneath it All
</center>
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OnDragonflyWings
- Addicted Roswellian
- Posts: 113
- Joined: Mon Oct 30, 2006 8:43 pm
OOC: Here goes nothing. And I apologize in advance because I love Firefly...so I hope that Michael doesn't sound too Jayne like, lol.
~Michael~
We've landed today and that makes me a happy man becuase as much as I like this ship...and as well as I tolerate most of it's crew, I'm going a little stir crazy. And I need a girl.
Maybe not the most innocent of comments, but I'm far from innocent.
But before I go out onto this planet, I need food.
I quickly make my way over to the kitchen, grunting when I enter. Both as a hello and as a way of rolling my eyes at the people I find there. Isabel and Alex for starters. Two people who always dance around the issue and never say what needs to be said.
I'm not good with words, but when I use 'em, I like to get right to the point.
Which might sound weird being that I've never said what they needed to be saying, but thats because I ain't never needed to say it.
And then there's Kira. She's pretty enough. And I can'tsay I'm not jealous of Max from time time, having a pretty little thing like that on this ship. But what would I do with a woman on this ship? Aside from the obvious? I'm not Max. I'm not the deep connection guy. Like I already told you, I don't do I love yous. And then there's the part where she's a seer. Which is one of the most unique and unnerving powers out there. But don't get me wrong, I like her fine.
I grab a bowl and some food and then sit down at the table with everybody. Both enjoying it and dreading it. Enjoying it becuase even though I might not let on all the time, I do like these people, they are my family, my crew. But also dreading it becuase they might make me talk.
And not only am I not always good with words, I'm not always big on 'em either.
~Michael~
We've landed today and that makes me a happy man becuase as much as I like this ship...and as well as I tolerate most of it's crew, I'm going a little stir crazy. And I need a girl.
Maybe not the most innocent of comments, but I'm far from innocent.
But before I go out onto this planet, I need food.
I quickly make my way over to the kitchen, grunting when I enter. Both as a hello and as a way of rolling my eyes at the people I find there. Isabel and Alex for starters. Two people who always dance around the issue and never say what needs to be said.
I'm not good with words, but when I use 'em, I like to get right to the point.
Which might sound weird being that I've never said what they needed to be saying, but thats because I ain't never needed to say it.
And then there's Kira. She's pretty enough. And I can'tsay I'm not jealous of Max from time time, having a pretty little thing like that on this ship. But what would I do with a woman on this ship? Aside from the obvious? I'm not Max. I'm not the deep connection guy. Like I already told you, I don't do I love yous. And then there's the part where she's a seer. Which is one of the most unique and unnerving powers out there. But don't get me wrong, I like her fine.
I grab a bowl and some food and then sit down at the table with everybody. Both enjoying it and dreading it. Enjoying it becuase even though I might not let on all the time, I do like these people, they are my family, my crew. But also dreading it becuase they might make me talk.
And not only am I not always good with words, I'm not always big on 'em either.
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Fehr'sBear
- Roswell Fanatic
- Posts: 1795
- Joined: Thu Mar 24, 2005 3:44 pm
- Location: Brendan's bedroom. duh.
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FaithfulAngel24
- Roswell Fanatic
- Posts: 2594
- Joined: Fri Jan 28, 2005 1:34 am
- Location: Alabama for now, but someday I'll be on a beach in Morocco
- Contact:
*Isabel*
Alex shoots me a friendly smile and nods politely , “It’s been quite an interesting morning,” My gaze is drawn to his long lean fingers as he runs them alluringly through his brown hair. What I’d give to have that hand glide softly over my body. I shake my head as if to erase that thought. “And you? How are you getting on this morning?” The object of my ongoing lust inquires and I abruptly turn my face so that he can’t see my heated cheeks.
I’ve got to stop having inappropriate day dreams about him. They can lead to nothing but trouble. Besides I’m not the type of girl that a man like Alex probably fantasizes about. He’s a well respected doctor. What the hell am I? I am saved from making a total fool out of myself when Michael enters the room dragging his black boots over to the counter. The man I consider to be a brother grabs a bite to eat and then sits down at the table with us. I smile despite myself when he simply grunts in recognition of the group.
“Interesting is a good word to describe it.” I answer before noticing that Michael is giving Alex and I an odd look. Uh Oh. The oh so broody one can’t tell I have feelings for Alex . Can he? Can you say mortified? Am I really that transparent? I need to calm down. I’m sure that I’m overreacting. Michael isn’t known for his talents of perception. “Good Morning Michael.” I greet warmly. Turning back to the man who holds my affections I question, "So what are your plans for today?"
Alex shoots me a friendly smile and nods politely , “It’s been quite an interesting morning,” My gaze is drawn to his long lean fingers as he runs them alluringly through his brown hair. What I’d give to have that hand glide softly over my body. I shake my head as if to erase that thought. “And you? How are you getting on this morning?” The object of my ongoing lust inquires and I abruptly turn my face so that he can’t see my heated cheeks.
I’ve got to stop having inappropriate day dreams about him. They can lead to nothing but trouble. Besides I’m not the type of girl that a man like Alex probably fantasizes about. He’s a well respected doctor. What the hell am I? I am saved from making a total fool out of myself when Michael enters the room dragging his black boots over to the counter. The man I consider to be a brother grabs a bite to eat and then sits down at the table with us. I smile despite myself when he simply grunts in recognition of the group.
“Interesting is a good word to describe it.” I answer before noticing that Michael is giving Alex and I an odd look. Uh Oh. The oh so broody one can’t tell I have feelings for Alex . Can he? Can you say mortified? Am I really that transparent? I need to calm down. I’m sure that I’m overreacting. Michael isn’t known for his talents of perception. “Good Morning Michael.” I greet warmly. Turning back to the man who holds my affections I question, "So what are your plans for today?"
Love is not finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. Looking for a little magic? Practical Enchantment