Things Roswell Characters Would Never Say

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killjoy
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Things Roswell Characters Would Never Say

Post by killjoy » Sun Jan 08, 2006 7:06 am

Ok for those of you who don't know yes this thread was on another board. But we were asked to move it to this board and so here we are.Just like the name says,if you come up with something funny that would have never been said on the show.....well let's hear it.

Now as the first one I'm going to start it.


Max: Michael for the last time you have to be more careful! That stunt you just pulled could have brought to much attention down on us.

Michael *rolling his eyes*:Good Lord Maxwell would you lighten up and quit being such a royal, no pun intended, pain in the ass!"

Kyle *perking up when he hears the phrase pain in the ass come out of Michael's mouth. Turning to look at Liz and Maria he smiles* You know there's got to be a good alien anal probe joke in what Guerin just said. But damn it I can't think of one right now!

Liz and Maria *at the same time* Shut up Kyle!



This falls under the well duh category on how stupid the Roswell writers were.

Maria: So let me see if I have this right. You're daughter has a very sever type of cancer?

Brody *nodding his head* Yes that's right.

Maria: And so for her treatment you take her to your local run of the mill hospital.While at the same time forgetting the fact that you're also a multi millionaire with the means to take her to any state of the art cancer treatment hospital in the world. Where she would be waited on hand and foot while being taken care of around the clock with the best and newest treatments that are around?

Brody *slaps his forehead* D'oh!

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Post by madroswellfan » Sun Jan 08, 2006 12:06 pm

lol! Brilliant KillJoy! I am soo glad to see this thread back :D

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Post by FaithfulAngel24 » Sun Jan 08, 2006 11:49 pm

Me to!! :wink:

Loved the nwe ones. I always wondered about that. :D
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Post by killjoy » Mon Jan 16, 2006 4:35 am

NEW YORK CITY

Max watched as Lonnie made her way into the room where the meeting was being held. She was wearing a pair of tight pants. Not to mention the low riding tank top she had on which gave everyone a nice view of her rather large pair of......

SMACK!!

"Damn it Tess what the hell was that for?" Max asked the short blonde alien after she had smacked him on the back of the head.

"Would you quit looking at Lonnie that way!" Tess rolled her eyes "For God sakes Max she's your sister!"

"Well technically Tess,Isabel is my sister. And Lonnie she's......" Max stopped talking and stared when Lonnie bent down at the waist in front of him and giving him a very good look down her shirt and at her......

SMACK!!

"That's just sick Max!"




For this joke to work lets all just pretend that Amy and Jim got married and so Maria and her mom are now living with Tess and the Valenti men.


"Maria I can't believe you told Max I said that about him!" Liz yelled mortified as she sat on her best friends bed.

Smirking at the way Liz was blushing Maria laughed "Oh yeah he got all excited when I told him how you moaned his name out in your sleep the other night."

"Oh my god Maria I told you that in best friend confidence!"

"Best friend confidence?" Maria's smirk got even bigger "Is that something like the mobs code of silence?"

"Ohhh....you...big..." Liz fumed as she pulled her knees up on the bed, grabbed a pillow and started batting Maria with it. Maria quickly grabbed her own pillow and soon both girls were laughing as they pelted one another. It was a second before either of them noticed that Kyle was standing in the doorway watching them pillow fight on the bed.

"Oh hey Kyle," said Maria now the one blushing "We were just...."

"You know..." said Kyle interrupting Maria "Usually when I have this dream there's normally some Jell-O involved and you two have on a lot less clothing."

"KYLE!!"

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madroswellfan
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Post by madroswellfan » Mon Jan 16, 2006 8:24 am

:lol: :D looool!

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Post by Roslover39 » Wed Jan 18, 2006 11:17 am

Max:Tess, I've never loved Liz. I'm leaving her
for you.
By French Dreamer
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"Evans, take it from someone who has seen way too many telegrams go out to newly widowed wives. In the long run it's best to travel as light as you can, if you know what I mean." Jim Valenti

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Post by Zanity » Wed Jan 18, 2006 12:57 pm

Roslover39 wrote:Max:Tess, I've never loved Liz. I'm leaving her
for you.
Along those lines...

Liz: Make love to me Max.
Max: I'm sorry Liz but I just don't think about you that way.

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Post by Roslover39 » Wed Jan 18, 2006 1:03 pm

:lol:

Liz: Max, don't you wanna touch my hair, stroke my skin?

Max: Why? :shock: :lol:
By French Dreamer
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"Evans, take it from someone who has seen way too many telegrams go out to newly widowed wives. In the long run it's best to travel as light as you can, if you know what I mean." Jim Valenti

Coming Soon!

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Post by FaithfulAngel24 » Wed Jan 18, 2006 5:37 pm

"You know..." said Kyle interrupting Maria "Usually when I have this dream there's normally some Jell-O involved and you two have on a lot less clothing."

"KYLE!!"
This had me rolling!!! :lol:
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Post by killjoy » Sat Jan 21, 2006 9:47 pm

Max begin to groan as she gently laid kiss down his stomach. Feeling her hands touch his thighs and other parts of his body in that area Max's groan became increased.

"Oh god Tess that feels so good." muttered Max.

Liz's head quickly shot up "What did you just say?!"

Oh shit, thought Max

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