I'm a Liar (AU, teen) 1/1 5.12.08

[Lorastar]

So, I'm going through old things I've written, and found this just sitting there, and thought I'd post it. It's really vague as to who it's about, so whoever you want it to be! =)

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Lyrics are Liar by 8 mm. Beautiful song. Roswell belongs to the people who own it. I am not one of them. =)
Rating: Teen, i suppose?
Summary: Random heartbreak truth from a female human perspective, based on the song Liar by 8 mm (words in pink)

I'm a liar
It's my secret no on knows
I'm a liar
Yeah, I know it doesn't show

She often wanders through the streets. Mainly at night time when they are deserted and cast in deep shadows. They say young women shouldn't walk alone at night time. The darkness hides things they should be afraid of. But the darkness doesn't scare her. Nothing out there is going to hurt her.

The key to her destruction is simple: it's her. She will destroy herself.

But she wishes something or someone else would try. For pain to be brought on by something besides her thoughts. Her thoughts and emotions drag her down. They bring her to these barren streets, praying for something to end it.

Nothing ever comes.

No, I don't miss you anymore
No, I don't think of you
It's such a game to seem adored
No, I don't love you anymore

She lied. Often. She worked so hard throughout the day to forget him. To forget her love. To make it seem like she was alright. But alright was the last thing she could be called.

Pale hands pushed dark hair away from her face. The streetlight didn't shine on her anymore. The moonlight never reflected off a brilliant smile on her face. She didn't smile anymore. Not for real.

Only at night time, did she reveal herself. Only at nighttime did she stop playing. Only at nighttime would she stop lying. Only the stars and moon saw her despair. Only they saw her tears, the lies slipping from her cheeks.

While the sun shone down on her, she pasted the patented "I'm okay" smile on her pale face. She lied to everyone; pretended she was ok. She acted like she wasn't thinking of him, not thinking of the way he made her feel. The way no one else would ever be capable of making her feel. Not that she wanted anyone else to.

The sun shone and she worked. She smiled and flitted, lying to the friendly faces that surrounded her. Her work was the most important thing to her, now, not that she told anyone that. But as she worked, as she busied her hands and her mind, her heart ached.

She told people that everything was great, not knowing that they could see past the lies to the tears she thought were hidden.

I'm a liar
Yeah, I've given up my wings
I'm a liar
They were only wax and string

To fly is what she wished. Running away is overrated. And you can only run so long before responsibility calls. And during those moments, waiting, sitting, being responsible, the thoughts of him return. They flood her mind and make her want to cry.

Only so much can happen before she breaks. She'd reached her breaking point. These tears slip unbidden. But he is not the only reason she sheds them. Her mind, once riddled only with thoughts of him, is scrambled. Fears, worries, life now fills that mind. The happiness she once knew intimately is what she now yearns for. Her greatest desire is to feel safe, loved, happy.

She wishes she could fly. If she could, she'd take off every time she thought of him. But then, everyone would know she was a liar, that she was thinking of him.

It's easier to hide it.

No, I don't miss you anymore
No, I don't think of you
It's such a game to seem adored
No, I don't love you anymore

She misses him. She'd give anything to be with him again. She loves him. And it hurts her more than he will ever know. She's worth more than a guy who chooses not to be with her, she knows that. But it doesn't change the fact that she loves him.

And so she wanders these streets at night. Wandering, letting the lies slip.

It's all she can do as she thinks of him.

No, I don't think of you
No, I don't love you anymore
No, I don't think of you
No, I don't love you anymore
No, I don't think of you
I don't love you

Lyrics > 8mm Lyrics > 8mm Liar Lyrics