Carolyn: I'm expecting an explosion somewhere soon in this not so perfect world.
My fics always have explosions. Heck, in the last one, there was a REAL explosion. No real ones here, but there could definitely be a metaphorical one.
Sara: And what a great coaching duo Michael and Kyle have turned out to be. I also like that Kyle tossed his crutch aside to join the kids...YES!
They've done very well with these kids, and it's been a much-needed experience for Kyle in particular.
Thanks for reading and leaving feedback!
Part 32
Even though Max only felt like he’d been home for five minutes, he realized he’d nodded off for about half an hour when the front door opened and in flew Dylan, jolting him awake.
“Dad, guess what?” he said, jumping onto the couch. “We won!”
Max rubbed is eyes and yawned, trying to get his bearings. “Really?”
“Yeah!” Dylan started bouncing up and down, a bundle of energy and excitement.
Oh, man, he thought regretfully.
I wish I could’ve been there to see it. “That’s awesome,” he said. “Good job.”
Maria kicked off her shoes and came to join them, perching herself on the arm of the couch. “It was amazing. He scored a touchdown in the first game, and then in the second game, he ended up scoring the game-winner.”
“What?
Wow.” Max held up his hand for a high five, and Dylan gave it to him.
“Yeah! It was like . . .
wham!” he babbled hopping down off the couch. “And I was like . . .” He proceeded to act out the entire play, though he was mostly just spinning all around and flailing his arms.
“He’s a little hyper,” Maria said, handing him her phone. “Here, I recorded as much as I could. But I was so nervous at the end that Sarah had to film it.”
“Oh, Sarah was there again, huh?” he said.
“Yep.” She smiled sympathetically and said, “I wish you could’ve been there.”
“Yeah.” As fun as it was to see Dylan so overjoyed, it didn’t compare to the real thing. He’d missed a huge moment in Dylan’s life, one that he would always remember. But what could he do? He had to work. He had to make money so he could provide for them.
“Alright, champ, I think it’s time for a victory bath,” Maria announced.
Dylan stopped whirling around and pouted exaggeratedly. “Do I hafta?”
“Yes. You got really dirty today.”
He gave her a mischievous look, and Max knew what was going to happen before Dylan even took off running. This was their nightly routine. He ran around the house, and she eventually caught him and got him in the tub. He seemed to hate baths less, however, when they made a game out of it.
“I’m gonna get you!” she squealed, taking off after him.
Max kicked his legs up onto the coffee table and found the videos on Maria’s phone, settling in to watch them. This was the next best thing to actually being there.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sarah had texted Tess periodically throughout the day to update her on how the game was going, so she knew the team had won before Kyle got home and started raving about it. It was almost surreal to see him so animated. He couldn’t—and in fact
wouldn’t—stop talking about it. He was up on his feet and everything. No chair. No support. Just him and his stories about all the great plays these kids had made today.
This is it, she thought, working up her inner courage as she watched him and only halfway listened.
It’s the right time.
“Oh, Tess, you should’ve been there,” he said for the umpteenth time. “It was amazing. It was huge. It was huge for these kids.”
Surely it was a big deal to them, but she sensed that it was an even bigger deal to him. Maybe he didn’t even realize it, but something about coaching this team and being out on the field again, even in a non-player capacity . . . it had sparked a liveliness in him, one that had been buried for a long, long time.
And that was why it was time to tell him. Tonight.
“Wow, Kyle,” she said, hearing the lingering traces of nervousness in her own voice. “That sounds amazing.”
“It was.” He walked over to the couch, but instead of sitting down, he just stood there, smiling and shaking his head as though he still couldn’t believe it had happened.
“Well, I’m really glad you guys won,” she said, moving towards him, fretfully wringing her fingers together. “Actually, I’m really glad you’re in such a good mood right now, because there’s—there’s something I wanted to talk to you about.”
He was so caught up in his own excitement, though, that he wasn’t really listening. “Oh, I didn’t even tell you about the trophy they won.”
“Kyle . . .” She didn’t care about the trophy.
“I mean, this thing is bigger than half the kids on the team. I’m not even exaggerating.”
“Kyle.” She couldn’t keep this from him any longer.
“I won plenty of games when I was young, but I don’t think they ever gave me a trophy like that.”
“Kyle, I’m pregnant.” The words fled her mouth abruptly; there was nothing she could do to stop them. And once they were out, she literally held her breath.
He became so quiet so quickly that it scared her. Right away, there was this confused, caught-off-guard look on his face, and his whole body sort of just . . . froze.
“What?” he finally managed to choke out.
Clearly he’d heard her. Why did she have to say it again? “I’m pregnant,” she repeated, holding one hand to her stomach. She tried to smile, but it was a shaky grin at best, and it gave way almost immediately. “Kyle, say something,” she begged, needing to know how he was feeling about this, what he was thinking.
He didn’t say anything, though. Instead, he did the worst thing he possibly could have done in that moment: He sat down on the couch.
“I know it wasn’t . . . planned,” she acknowledged meekly, looking down at him, “but . . .” Her breathing was starting to come more rapidly now, sped up by anxiety. “Kyle, I really need you to . . . just react,” she told him.
“I don’t . . . what am I supposed to say?” he sputtered unsurely. “How did this happen?”
She gave him a look. Did he really need an explanation?
“No, I mean . . . I know
how,” he said, “but . . . weren’t you on the pill?”
“Well, yeah, but--”
“
But?”
“It’s just—I wasn’t really taking it every day,” she admitted.
“
What?” he shrieked. “What’s the point of it then?”
“Kyle, we hardly ever have sex,” she pointed out. “I didn’t think--”
“Yeah, well, you should’ve thought about it.”
She huffed, hating the harshness of his tone. “Well, guess what: It takes two, guy-with-no-condom.”
“So you’re saying this is my fault?”
“No! It’s—it’s no one’s
fault.” She hated that he would even use that word to describe their . . . situation. Despite that, she tried to maintain her cool, because she knew that one of them would need to. And clearly that wasn’t going to be him. “Look, I always assumed we’d start a family someday. Even back in high school, we always used to talk about it.”
“Yeah, but it was gonna be down the road.”
She motioned wildly about their house and said, “We
are down the road.”
“Not really. You’re twenty years old, Tess. I’m only twenty-one.”
She knew he was trying to use their age to point out how young they still were, but in all honesty, she hadn’t felt young for one second since he’d taken that fateful hit on that stupid field. “We’re not kids anymore, Kyle.”
“That doesn’t mean . . .” He trailed off, digging one hand through his hair, lowering his head, moaning, “Oh my god,” as though the thought of this actually pained him.
“I’m sorry, but are you not the least bit happy?” she asked, fighting to keep her panicked tears inside where they belonged. “Because a minute ago you were so happy.”
“I was,” he agreed.
“Okay, ‘cause I just thought—I don’t know—maybe finding out you’re gonna be a dad would excite you a little more than winning a football game would.”
“How did you expect me to react?” he barked out angrily.
“Not like this.” Despite all her best efforts to not cry, a few tears spilled over, and she had to wipe them away. “God, I thought you would be, like, yeah, scared and stuff, but . . . supportive, too.”
“Supportive?” he echoed as though he didn’t even understand what the word meant. “I can’t . . . god, Tess, I can’t . . .”
“You can’t what?” she prompted. “You can’t support this?”
“No, maybe I can’t.”
When he said that . . . it felt like her whole stomach just dropped to the floor. She felt like she was going to be sick.
“Look at me!” he cried. “Look at me, Tess!”
She squeezed her eyes shut as more tears fell over, and she shook her head adamantly. No, she didn’t want to look at him. Not when he was like this.
“I’m not even the same guy I used to be! I’m not the guy you fell in love with.”
A giant sob shook her body, and she covered up her face with one hand, keeping the other on her stomach.
“I can’t do any of the things I used to do!” he went on, like one giant wail of agony. “What’s gonna happen when we our kid wants me to run around and play tag with him? Or play football?”
“Then you’ll coach him,” she whimpered, “just like you did all those kids today.”
“No, it’s not . . . it’s not the same!” he yelled. “You don’t get it!”
No, she thought.
I don’t.
“What if we have a daughter, and she wants me to walk her down the aisle someday? And I can’t do that.”
“You can walk!” she yelled back at him.
“Not like I used to!”
“That doesn’t matter, Kyle!” God, she felt like pulling her hair out; he was being so ridiculous. It was like he was just permanently stuck in the past, and no matter how many times she tried to reach him and pull him out . . . he just stayed there.
“I’m sorry,” he apologized, but there didn’t seem to be much genuine sentiment behind it. “I know this isn’t what you wanna hear, but . . . I don’t know what to tell you. I’m just not ready to be a dad.”
She snorted, wiping her nose with the back of her hand. “Yeah, well, I’m not sure you have much choice in that.”
He didn’t say anything. But he didn’t have to. He got this stern, sudden look on his face, and as he stared at nothing in particular, she could see him . . .
thinking. Considering options.
“Oh my god,” she gasped, horrified. “Kyle . . .” He wouldn’t actually suggest it. Would he? “No.”
“Tess . . .”
“Don’t.” Her heart would seriously break into pieces if he even said it.
“I don’t think you should you have this baby, Tess.”
And just like that . . . it shattered. She felt like it was glass, and that cruel suggestion was a giant sledgehammer slamming onto it mercilessly. “What?” she barely managed to choke out.
“I just . . . I don’t think you should,” he repeated quietly, his voice cloaked with emotion. He swallowed hard and averted her eyes, clearly ashamed.
She staggered around a bit, literally feeling dizzy, barely able to keep her balance. Was this really happening? It couldn’t be. Because there was no way . . . even though he was depressed and not himself, there was no
way Kyle would tell her to get an abortion.
“Get out,” she growled, barely even able to look at him without hating him in that moment. She didn’t want to see his face. She didn’t want to hear his voice. She wanted him gone.
“Tess . . .” He actually had the audacity to reach up and grab her hand, but she jerked it away from him.
“I said get out!” She backed away, glaring at him in outrage. How dare he even try to touch her after all of this. She wouldn’t let him.
Seemingly resigned, he pushed himself up off the couch and stumbled over to his wheelchair. He got into it and wheeled himself past her wordlessly. He had to lean forward to open the door, and he didn’t bother to reach back to shut it on his way out. So she stomped over there and slammed it for him, then leaned back against it, slid down to the floor, and sobbed.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sarah had this special paper to print photos on, so when they got home, she wasted no time printing off the picture of the team posing with their trophy. Dylan and Luke were in the front row, each with a hand on it, and Michael and Kyle were standing on either side of the back row.
“Here we go,” she said as she latched it into a picture frame. She carefully hung it up on the wall right to the side of their TV. When she seemed sure it was straight, she stepped back and declared, “Perfect.”
“That looks good,” Michael agreed. The trophy itself was sitting on the floor below that picture. He was going to have to take it to school on Monday and see if there was any kind of trophy case where they could display it. It wasn’t real gold, obviously, but it was shiny and flashy as hell. Engraved on the bottom were the words
2015 Champions: Eddy County Youth Football.
“You did a good thing with that team, Michael,” Sarah said, swaying towards him.
“Yeah, they picked the right day to show up and win, huh?” That was the nice thing about youth football. The rest of the season didn’t matter.
“It’s about more than just winning,” she said. “It’s teamwork and confidence and all that good stuff.”
“Yeah.” Those boys were definitely going to have more confidence now, and they’d worked together pretty well. “I guess I did alright.”
“You did better than alright. In fact . . .” She hooked her hands into his belt loops and pulled his waist closer to hers. “I think we should have a victory celebration.”
“A victory celebration?” he echoed, grinning. “How are we gonna celebrate?” As if he didn’t already know.
“However you want,” she answered flirtatiously.
Hell yeah. He lifted her up and set her down on the kitchen table, immediately moving himself in between her legs as he kissed her. His tongue jutted into her mouth right away, and his hand slithered up under her shirt. She’d already gotten dressed in her pajamas, so she was braless. Perfect.
Just as he’d started to caress her, though, there was a loud knock on the door. He stilled, groaned, and told her, “Hold that thought,” as he went to see who it was.
He’d barely opened the door and said, “Kyle,” when Shango hopped down off the couch and raced forward, jumping up into Kyle’s lap. Kyle started petting him right away. “What’re you doin’ here?” Michael asked him.
Instead of answering, he just said, “Can I come in?”
“Sure.” Michael stepped aside, opening the door as wide as he could so that Kyle could maneuver his wheelchair inside. It was crowded, that was for sure. This small apartment really wasn’t designed for such a bulky thing.
Michael shut the door and shot Sarah a quick look. Her expression was a questioning one, but he didn’t know why Kyle was there any more than she did, so he just shrugged.
“Hey, Kyle,” she greeted, sliding down off the table.
“Oh, hey, Sarah,” he mumbled, trying to wheel himself in front of the couch. There were a few books on the floor in the way, though, so eventually he just locked his chair into place, got up, and took three steps towards the couch, sitting down eagerly, still with Shango in his lap.
“What’s up, man?” Michael asked, unlocking the chair so he could fold it up and push it aside. “Haven’t had your fill of me today?”
Kyle didn’t laugh. Didn’t even crack a smile.
“Did you wheel yourself all the way over here?” Michael asked him.
“Well, I sure as hell didn’t drive, did I?” he snapped back.
“Sorry. Just askin’.” Kyle had to be driven everywhere, because he still didn’t have enough motor control to operate a vehicle. “You okay?”
“No.” He kept petting Shango, never looking up from the dog. “Tess and I got in a fight.”
Michael looked over at Sarah again. He could tell they were both thinking the same thing:
She told him. It seemed . . . pretty obvious, but he asked anyway, “About what?”
Kyle sighed and revealed, “She’s pregnant.” Except it wasn’t much of a reveal at all, and when he looked up and saw both of them trying to act surprised, he saw right through it. “And you both knew.”
“Kyle, she asked us not to say anything,” Sarah told him.
“I haven’t known for long,” Michael added.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Kyle’s eyes were full of anger and accusation, but it was all directed at Michael, not at Sarah.
“ ‘cause I promised Tess I wouldn’t. She had to be the one to tell you. You know that, man.” It didn’t matter that they were best friends. He would have had
no right to spill the beans about this. “So I take it you’re not handling it well,” he deduced. Wasn’t a hard deduction.
“How am I supposed to raise a kid?” Kyle wailed. “Honestly, I can’t even take care of myself. I’m so fucked up.”
“Well . . .” Michael couldn’t really argue that, but at least things had been better these past couple weeks. He sat down beside him, speculating, “Maybe having a kid would help motivate you to get better. I mean, Luke and Dylan and all those guys on the team . . . they motivated you.”
Kyle shook his head. “That’s different.”
“How?”
“It just is.”
“Kyle?” Sarah walked softly into the living room, halfway cringing when she asked, “What exactly did you say to Tess that made you come all the way over here?”
“I just told her how I feel.”
“What’d you say?” Michael prodded. It must have been pretty bad.
Kyle sighed, drew it out for a few seconds, then muttered, “I told her I don’t wanna be a dad.”
“Well, you’re gonna be,” Michael responded simply.
“Not necessarily.”
“What’re you--?” He trailed off abruptly when he sensed what Kyle was talking about. He thought about Max and Maria and that whole situation, and how fucked up that had all been, and he couldn’t even believe his best friend would consider doing the same thing. “Oh, no. No. You can’t leave her to fend for herself here. Come on, man, she shouldn’t have to do this alone.”
“Maybe she shouldn’t do it at all,” he grumbled.
It took a second for that to sink it, but when it did, Sarah let out a little gasp, and Michael’s eyes nearly bulged out of his head. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” he roared, shooting to his feet.
“I’m just saying, it’s an option.”
“Are you . . .” He threw his hands up in disbelief. “. . .
fucking kidding me? Are you out of your mind? What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“Well, my spine, for starters.”
“What the hell is your fucking problem?” he blasted. “Tess tells you she’s pregnant, and this is how you react?”
“Michael . . .” Sarah said softly, as if to caution him not to get too mad.
“No, this is bullshit!” he yelled, literally resisting the urge to smack some sense into this guy he used to look up to. “Do you know where I’d be right now if my dad had gotten his way? I wouldn’t be anywhere; I wouldn’t exist. We wouldn’t be having this conversation.” Just thinking about it made a chill run up his spine. “Is that what you want for your kid? Do you really just wanna
abort your own
child?”
“No!” Kyle said.
“Then why would you even consider it?”
“I just . . .” Kyle whole face contorted as he started to cry. “I don’t know. I’m so confused. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.”
Sarah scampered into the bedroom to find her phone, undoubtedly to call Tess and check in on her.
“Did you suggest this to Tess?” Michael kept on. “Did you tell her to get an abortion?”
“Not in those exact words.”
“But you implied it.” Michael snorted, astonished, and paced back and forth a bit, more pissed off than he’d been in a long time. “God, you’re really a son of a bitch right now, Kyle. I can’t believe we’re even talkin’ about this.”
“Oh, well, sorry, Michael,” Kyle apologized sarcastically. “Sorry I’m not more like you. Sorry I’m not gonna jump at the first chance I get to be a father, even though it’s obvious I’m not ready for it.”
Michael winced inwardly, glancing over at Sarah. She had frozen and tensed up mid-dial, and she frowned a bit. But then she kept dialing.
“You’re an ass right now,” Michael flat-out told him.
“Fine, I’m an ass.”
“Um, Kyle?” Sarah piped up. “Tess isn’t answering.”
“She probably won’t,” he said.
“Maybe I should go over there?” she proposed.
“No, just give her some space,” he said. “She’s upset.”
“Imagine that,” Michael grumbled.
“Can I just stay here tonight?” Kyle practically begged, his voice quivering. “Please?” He didn’t wait for an answer. Instead, he laid down on the couch, and he seemed literally heartbroken when Shango jumped down and he couldn’t pet him anymore. It was like that had been the only thing making him feel better.
Too pissed to even talk to him anymore, Michael left him there to wallow in self-pity and shuffled towards Sarah, mumbling unhappily, “Guess our celebration’s gonna have to wait.”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Even though he was tired as hell, Michael got up early to drive Kyle back home. Tess had sent Sarah a few text messages last night telling her not to worry and that she was going to be okay, but she and Kyle weren’t going to be okay as a couple if they stayed apart for too long. Michael knew that the sooner Kyle got his ass back home, manned up, and apologized, the better off they would be.
“So where’s your head at today?” he asked as he unloaded the wheelchair from the trunk of his car.
“Still all over the place,” Kyle admitted.
Michael slammed his trunk shut, unfolded the chair, and wheeled it over to Kyle. “What’re you gonna say to her?” he asked.
Kyle shrugged and sat down. “Start with sorry and go from there, I guess.”
“
Are you sorry?” Michael challenged. It’d be worthless if he didn’t really mean it.
“Yeah,” Kyle confessed. “I don’t . . .” He shook his head as Michael wheeled him forward. “I don’t really want her to get an abortion. I don’t even know why I said that.”
Well, clearly having a night to sleep on this life-changing revelation had been good for Kyle. He’d calmed down a lot, and Michael had calmed down a lot, and now maybe there was some actual hope that Tess could forgive him for being such a monumental jackass.
“Sorry I chewed you out,” Michael said as he pushed Kyle up the ramp to his front door.
“No, I probably needed it,” Kyle mumbled in admittance. “Thanks, man.”
“No problem.” Michael leaned forward and twisted the doorknob, opening it up. “Tess?” he called. He pushed Kyle inside and shut the door behind him. It was almost eerily quiet in that house. He was so used to hearing the TV on when he came over.
“Tess?” Kyle said quietly.
“Doesn’t seem like she’s home,” Michael remarked. “Her car was gone. Is she at work?”
“I don’t think so.” Kyle held on tightly to the arms of his chair and pushed himself up into a standing position. He slowly made his way into the living room, and Michael decided to go check back in the bedroom.
“Tess?” he said as he opened up the door and peeked in. But she wasn’t in there, either. There were clothes strewn all about, though, and the closet door was hanging open. It looked . . . almost empty.
Oh, shit, he thought, sensing that he already knew where Tess was. He checked the bathroom, opening up the cabinets to find that they were half empty, too. It was like all her stuff wasn’t there.
When he got back out to the living room, Kyle was just sitting there on the couch, looking lost and dumbfounded as he held a small paper in his hand. “She’s gone,” he said dazedly.
Fuck. He should have brought Kyle back last night instead of letting him crash on his couch.
Michael went up to him and took the note out of his hand, giving it a quick read-through. Just as he’d thought, she said she went back to Roswell to go stay with her family. The last line said,
Now you don’t have to be a dad.
Michael sighed, worrying that there wasn’t going to be a way to fix this big of a problem. Tess had never left Kyle before, even though she’d probably thought about it dozens of times.
He handed the note back to his devastated friend, and Kyle stared at it hopelessly for a few seconds before crumpling it in his hand before leaning forward to shut his eyes and hang his head. He looked the worst Michael had ever seen him look, even worse than he’d been in the hospital when they’d told him that his football career was over. And that was saying something.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
When Michael got back from Kyle’s, he found Sarah on the couch, studying.
“Hey,” she said. “How’s Tess?”
“I don’t know,” he replied. “She left.”
“What?” Sarah immediately checked her phone, as if she’d expected Tess to text her about that or something.
“Went home,” he said, flopping down beside her on the middle cushion that sank in a little too far. “So you know what that means? Now I gotta drag my ass back to Roswell, get her, and bring her back here so she and Kyle can work things out.”
“Do you think they can?” she asked.
“I hope so.” If Kyle didn’t have Tess . . . then he’d really have nothing. When Michael had left him, he’d had the remote in his hand and was channel surfing, claiming he’d be okay, but honestly, he didn’t want to leave him alone there too long. Isolation wasn’t good for a guy like Kyle.
“Well, he seemed like he was doing better this morning,” Sarah remarked.
“Yeah. He’s pretty catatonic right now, though. That’s why I have to get Tess back here.”
“Maybe I should go with you,” she suggested. “Or I could go and you could stay here with Kyle.”
“It’s fine. I got it,” he assured her. “I know exactly where she lives. I’ll be there and back in no time.” He got to his feet and headed over to the dresser to find some different clothes to wear. The shirt he had on right now was the one he’d slept in last night.
“Hey, Michael?”
“Yeah?” He sniffed a grey Metallica t-shirt, figuring it would do, and peeled off his old one.
“What did Kyle mean when he said he wasn’t like you?” she inquired. “Something about being a dad without actually being ready for it?”
Michael groaned on the inside, stopping what he was doing. He just stood there for a moment with the shirt in his hand, silently lamenting that he was now going to have to tell her yet
another thing about his past. “A couple years ago . . .” he said, “Maria and I thought she might be pregnant. But she wasn’t. Obviously.” There. Enough said. He put the new shirt on, eager to get out on the road and get this done.
“But you were . . . excited about it?” she asked.
“Well, no. I mean, I was eighteen. But I wasn’t . . . I wasn’t dreading it, either.” It was a confusing thing for him to think about, even now.
“Were you disappointed that she wasn’t?”
He shut the dresser drawer, mumbling, “A little bit.” Shit, if he had to tell her all this stuff, he’d better at least be honest about it. “I was young. Stupid. Naïve. Thought I could handle it. Hindsight’s twenty-twenty, of course.” He made his way behind the couch, bent down, and kissed the top of her head. “I’ll be back later.” And then he practically bolted, not only because it was best to get Tess back to Carlsbad as soon as possible, but also because he just didn’t want to go any more in-depth in this conversation.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Fucking Roswell.
Words couldn’t describe the dark cloud that hovered over Michael from the moment he crossed the city limits. He kept reminding himself that it would just be a quick trip. In and out. Just like sex. Only less pleasurable.
Even with that mindset, though, he found himself taking a detour from the route to Tess’s house, driving the familiar streets towards his own instead. Taking a left instead of a right, hitting the brakes when he should have kept going. He pulled up outside his house, figuring that, even though he was popping in unannounced, someone was likely to be there. It was Sunday morning, after all. Wasn’t like they’d be in church or anything.
His mom’s car wasn’t in the driveway, but he headed up to the front door anyway. It was locked, so he used his key to let himself in, and right away . . .
“Jesus Christ,” he swore. Nicholas was on top of Tina on the couch, and they were making out. Hands
everywhere. Not a sight he wanted to see.
“Michael!” Tina gasped in surprise, squirming up into a seated position. “What’re you doing here?”
He ignored her and spoke straight to Nicholas. “Get out.”
Nicholas, like the idiot he was, just sat there, sputtering, “I—I didn’t—I wasn’t--”
“Get out,” Michael repeated vehemently, “before I punch your face in.”
Nicholas stumbled to his feet, sidestepping past Michael with his hands up, as if to shield himself. Once he was out the door, he literally ran.
“God, Michael,” Tina said, grabbing a pillow to hold over her stomach. “You didn’t have to be so mean.”
“No, actually, I did,” he argued, shutting the door. “I’m your big brother, remember?”
“You scared him.”
“Good.” Kid was a wimp anyway.
She rolled her eyes.
“Where’s Mom?” he asked. Tina was pretty brazen these days, but he doubted even
she’d be daring enough to do this shit with their mom around.
“She’s at the store,” Tina replied.
“Oh, so while she’s out getting groceries, you’re getting felt up.”
“He
is my boyfriend, you know.”
“I
really don’t care, you know.” He headed into the kitchen, got a bottle of water out of the fridge, took a swig, and went back in the living room, finding that he wished she would move that pillow. He wanted to see how big she was at this point so he had a better idea of how much time he had left to talk some sense into her about her decision.
“Why are you here?” she asked him again.
He didn’t sit down, only because he didn’t intend to stay long. “Gotta get Tess.”
“Tess?” she echoed. “She’s here?”
“Yeah.”
For a second, her eyes lit up. “Is Kyle?” It was like that old childhood crush she’d had on him still existed.
“No. They’re, uh . . . they’re having problems.”
“Oh.” She grimaced. “That sucks.”
“Yeah, you’d better hope they work it out.”
“Why?”
“ ‘cause if even Tess and Kyle don’t end up together, there’s really no hope for you and Nicholas, is there?”
“Oh.” She made a face and fake-laughed. “God, you’re a jerk today.”
He shrugged unapologetically. “I don’t wanna be here.”
“So leave.”
“I will.” He just stood there, though, and she kept looking at him expectantly. In the back of his mind, he knew what he wanted to say to her; he just didn’t know if there was any point to it.
“What?” she finally said.
“It’s just . . .” He narrowed his eyes at her, hating this whole icy demeanor/bitchy attitude she had going on. The teen years were just starting, too. He was going to have to deal with a lot more of this. “I heard what you said to Maria.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yeah.”
“How?”
“She told me.”
Tina’s eyebrows rose up, as if she were intrigued now. “
Really?”
“Yeah.” He didn’t want to make it seem like they were just casually hanging out all the time, though, so he added, “In class.”
“Right, the class,” she said. “Are you guys still gonna talk and hang out and stuff after that’s done?”
“We’re not hanging out,” he denied.
“Not at all?”
“No. Well . . .” There were the football games and stuff, but that was different. “Sarah’s been gettin’ to know her a little bit.”
“Does she like her?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you think she
really likes her?”
“Yeah, she--”
Fuck, he thought, realizing she’d tricked him into getting off topic. “Would you just answer the question?”
“I forget the question,” she said with a flippant shrug.
“Why’d you lay into Maria when she was here? She was just tryin’ to help you.”
“Uh, she didn’t help, first of all,” Tina informed him. “And second . . . she deserved it. She broke up with you, remember?”
“People break up,” he said. “You and Nicholas are probably gonna break up someday. Are you gonna hold that against him?”
“We’re not gonna break up,” she insisted blindly.
“Oh, that’s right, you won’t. ‘cause you live in perfect fairytale land.” He smirked.
She glared at him. “Michael. You’re not seriously mad at me for fighting with Maria, are you? I just said all the things you wanted to say.”
“No, you didn’t.”
Stubbornly, she sat back, crossing her arms and her legs. “She didn’t love you.”
“You don’t even know what you’re talking about. You made her feel like crap, and all she was doing was trying to give you some advice.”
“I didn’t ask for advice,” she reminded him. “And I didn’t ask for a lecture.”
“But maybe you need one.” He shook his head, completely
disgusted with her attitude. Somewhere deep down inside, he knew there were still the remnants of young girl who was terrified of the path she was on. But until she
wanted to put those pieces of herself back together, there wasn’t much he could do. “You know what? Screw it,” he decided. “I can’t talk to you when you’re like this.” He headed for the door, but just as he opened it, she called him back.
“Michael.”
Annoyed, he stopped and looked back at her.
“You have to be careful with Maria,” she warned, her eyes locked with his as she said it, “because if you’re not . . . Tess and Kyle won’t be the only couple having problems.”
That had to be the first thing she’d said since he walked in that wasn’t dripping with teenage dramatics. In fact, she actually sounded like she was sincerely cautioning him. And he couldn’t deny that hearing her say that . . . it put him on edge a little.
“I’m serious,” she said.
Yeah, he knew she was. But he was serious, too, when he suggested, “Worry about your own life. I got mine under control.” Overwhelmed with disappointment in the way this whole conversation had gone, he left, wishing now that he’d never even stopped by in the first place.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A kid with blonde hair came to the door when Michael rang the bell. Which younger brother was this? He couldn’t remember. “Hi,” he said. “Is Tess here?”
“Tess!” the kid yelled shrilly, letting Michael come inside.
Tess’s family’s house was so big and nice—the total opposite of where she and Kyle lived now—that Michael felt obligated to take his shoes off at the door. He waited for Tess to come downstairs, and when she did, she didn’t look particularly thrilled to see him.
“Took you longer than I thought,” she muttered.
“Did Sarah tell you I was coming?” he asked.
“No. But I knew you would. You are gonna be a counselor, after all.”
“Well, not a marriage one.”
She grunted. “Good thing Kyle and I aren’t married then.” She sat down on the second to last step of the staircase, sighing. “Look, Michael, I know you’re just here to help, and you want us to work things out, but . . . I just don’t know if that’s possible.”
“It’s possible,” he assured her, sitting down next to her. “He wants to.”
“No, you didn’t hear what he said,” she mumbled, sounding . . . resigned. Defeated. “And even if you knew, you’d still defend him, because he’s, like, your bromantic soul mate or whatever. And that’s fine. I get it. I really do. It’s just--”
“I know what he said,” Michael cut in. “He told me.”
“He did?” She sounded surprised. “Well, then hopefully you can understand why I didn’t wanna stick around.”
“I understand,” he said, “but you’re gonna have a baby with this guy.”
“Am I?” She dabbed at her eyes as she started to cry. “Because he made it pretty clear he has no interest in that.”
“He’s just freaked out,” Michael assured her. “And I know that doesn’t excuse half the shit he said, but he’s already doin’ better now that he’s had a night to sleep on it. I promise you, Tess, if you come back with me, you guys can work things out.”
“I don’t even know if I want to anymore,” she pondered sadly. “Maybe I am just better off doing this on my own.”
“Kyle can be a good dad,” Michael insisted. “You know he can. That guy who used to sit and talk baby names with you . . . that guy still exists. Trust me. I saw him every second he was with those kids on the team. He’s still there, Tess.”
She sniffled, shaking her head doubtfully. “I don’t know . . .”
“He’s still there,” Michael reiterated. Maybe if he said it enough, she’d start to believe it.
“He wanted me to have an
abortion, Michael,” she ground out. “Do you have any idea what it was like to hear him say that?”
“He doesn’t really want that,” Michael assured her. “His emotions were just all over the place, and I don’t even think he really knew what he was saying.”
“Well, he still said it.”
“He’s not sayin’ it now. Tess . . .” He understood her resistance, but he’d get down on his knees and beg if he had to. “Just come back with me. Give him another chance.”
She squeezed her eyes shut, put her hands over her face, and cried. She couldn’t say anything, but she nodded wordlessly, and he got the message.
“Come here,” he said, putting his arm around her, pulling her into a hug against his side. He sensed she’d been wanting to cry like this for a long time, so he figured he could just sit there with her while she let it all out. And then they could go home.
TBC . . .
-April