Roswell Fanatics

Sinead O’Connor’s Nothing Compares 2 U plays…


She only wished there was a chance with him again but as the song was fading away, she was listening to music on her iPod. She did not know why she was doing this to herself. Because she was barely standing up right, and in fact she was not even able to even stand at the moment because she was in not control of her life. Any semblance of control lasted about three weeks once she and Callie had gone back to their home in Bethesda. Initially, she had thought that had been the best option for her. She still did not regret it. Even where it would lead her. Because it meant getting the hell out of Roswell, and back to the life that did not have her mourning the loss of the greatest love of her lifetime. The reason I am even alive to try to achieve the glory that always wanted to achieve. But once she came back to life in Bethesda. And even if Max was not part of the life. She still had to remember that she did not the one person that had been responsible for her getting her to this point.

Because he was dead.

Still, she and Callie had gone home, with the hope of getting out of Roswell would be the best thing for her. It beats staying there and not seeing Max in any capacity because she still had a great amount of guilt about the events that led to his passing. Because I will always treasure the fact, we got to spend time together.

And boy did we spend time together she knew. But it was a mess, and she had ended it, and if only she had not ended it, he might not have walking out of the house and into a hail of gunfire. The whys did not matter to her.

She knew why Jim had closed the investigation because there was no evidence of the shooter anywhere. And given Max was who he was she knew that there was the reason to believe his ultimate passing could very well be for reasons that did not even matter to the life that he had been leading. Because it could be any number of enemies and she knew there were enemies, so it was not so far fetched, and if that was to have happened then Liz knew Jim would not have the jurisdiction to get justice.

So, he had to close it and rule it unsolved. Pending any discovery of evidence to reassess the investigation. She knew the tabloids were all over why there was so early of a closure of the case. Was there something the town did not know of, they would cry. Why is the Sheriff closing the investigation? rang the headlines. Because they had been fascinated by the lurid details of his last hours, but they really were more interested in the soapy nature of it all than to mull over the manner of his death, and what or who was the cause of Max’s death. Even if Liz was no longer around to be made mincemeat in the public over her affair with a married man. She was out of their limelight. So, Liz did not even care whether it was solved or not. All that matter to her was Max was no longer living.

What does it matter if it we found out who did it, because it cannot bring Max back to life she thought. Because I already got that miracle once before.

You are never going to get that again she knew.

And therefore, he was someone she could not see…

But as the days went on, she was sure she was seeing him.

It was insanity.

Because everywhere she was going. Even when she was trying to stay sane and was in her everyday life. A life that had no reason whatsoever for Max to have any part of it. Because everyone here does not know how unique Max was… Still memories, and images of her former boyfriend still popped up.

And she had eventually lost it.

Completely. Having a meltdown at an industry event, which was not very good and therefore she was officially on stress leave medical leave, and she was not sure once she was deemed sane enough go back to her life. That her job would be there waiting. Even though they had go through the motions and hold it for her.

She did not even know if she wanted it to be waiting for…

And after all, it was only her now at home. Because the ability to care for herself, and even more so a child only lasted those three weeks before Callie went back to Roswell to spend the summer with her grandparents. Even though she had wanted to stay home and be a comfort for her mother, but Liz knew that was no life for a growing child.

She wanted Callie to have fun. And Jeff and Nancy were up for it. But she had not told her parents why it was needed. She only said Callie had some free time. Plans that she had had gone by the wayside because Liz was in no state to enact them.

So, they grabbed onto the chance.

But that had been a mistake because Callie had been a barrier of sorts for her, and once gone, and she was really left alone. Then she really lost it once she was home all alone.

And seeing Max everywhere.

It made no sense.

But it was like a ghost story she thought. And it did not help that she got dealt an additional personal loss once Callie was gone, that rivaled losing Max in the first place. It was something she still was not reason to talk about, and she knew it was the only reason she would be getting her release papers.

Talking she thought. She needed to talk about the personal tragedies to get out of this place. Because with Callie gone, she had really lost it.

And admitted to the Bethesda Mental Hospital. Self admittance. The official reason was exhaustion, but she knew they were thinking she was crazy.

Loopy.

She knew there had to be some reason why she was seeing Max everywhere she looked. Don’t they know I see things that many others would not be able to see she thought of her gift. Often dormant before her return to Roswell. Because she had not wanted the link to Max, but once he was gone, and she realized that she still had the gift. It had been lifeline, but it made her question her sanity.

So, she sought help…

And therefore, it was where she was, and had been for the last many weeks… She wanted to go home. But she was not getting the clearance. “We called your parents,” came the words of her doctor as they opened the door to her hospital room. “I know you did not want us to do it.”

Yes, I did not want you to do it “What gives you the right?” she said miffed. “I did not want to worry them.”

“They were worried all on their own,” Doctor Thelma Irving said as assessed her patient. “They have been trying to get in touch with you for weeks, and finally they contacted our police department, and asked that they track you down. Apparently, your parents are personal friends with their town Sheriff, who made a few calls, and finally was able to track you down because of his sources.”

Damn it Jim Liz muttered to herself. Yeah, I know why they know the town Sheriff she thought. “What did they say?”

“They wanted to know that you are, okay?” Dr. Irving asked. “So, how are you today, Liz?”

“That is for you to judge,” Liz muttered. “If it was up to me, I would have already gone home” she thought even though she was treating the last few weeks as a spa vacation so that she did not have to think about home. And being alone.

And not even having Max to dream about.

“It is,” Dr. Irving nodded. “If you want to get out of here then we need to be satisfied that you can handle yourself on the outside. Your father will be arriving tomorrow…” she said softly. “He will be taking you back to their home…”

“Damn it,” Liz muttered. “That is the last thing I wanted. Dr. Irving, I cannot go back to Roswell,” she said. “You can let me out, and I will go anywhere else. I will get all the help I can on the outside. I will have someone live with me, but I cannot go back to Roswell.”

“Why not?” Dr. Irving asked. “Is it your family that is the issue?” she asked.

“Hell no, they are the best people in the world” Liz muttered. And they are. Mom and Dad were the best parents she thought. Not a trouble in the world she thought, I am the one who complicated their lives when I became involved with the alien invasion and changed my whole destiny she muttered and she stayed silent, as there was so much that she could not say.

It was why she should not be in some mental hospital.

Because they ask too many damn questions she muttered. But she needed to be away from her daily life, and in a place that would not be easy to be found in, and yet now I have been found.

What does it mean?

Liz did not know but she could see the concern on her doctor’s face. Because she had said too much, and so little at the same time. “Then why can’t you go back to your hometown?” Dr. Irving asked. “Your daughter currently is there, right now?” she asked. “You have talked a great deal of Callie, right?” she asked. “Why not go back to see her?”

“I love my daughter,” Liz murmured “I love my family,” she said. “They are not why I am here,” she sighed. And not why I cannot go back she mused to herself.

“Then why are you here?” Dr. Irving. Because she knew Dr. Elizabeth Parker’s case is a mystery one for me, she acknowledges. Most long-term patients would give me a sense of why they are here, but Liz is not talking…

About anything…

Except her daughter. All she says is that she experienced a great loss, but she cannot talk about it, and she has kept to it the doctor assessed which meant that she knew that her patient was keeping a whole lot to herself. And it was becoming a burdensome exercise.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Liz said softly.

“So, if you won’t talk about it. Then we don’t know if well enough to be released. Because we are not sure. The only way out of here is for your parents to help you,” she said softly. “They were greatly concerned when they realized you were here…”

“I bet they were,” Liz muttered. Sorry Mom and Dad “I don’t want to go home.”

“What do you want?”

“I want Max to be alive,” Liz said softly.

“Whose Max?” Dr. Irving asked of the new kernel of information.


Max was the greatest love of her life. And she was at a loss without him. She had been able to get through a decade with out him because she had known he was alive, but to know he was not alive. Well, that was something she could not handle. She simply went silent because to tell the story of her and Max would be talking about something she could not talk about. Even if she kept it simple. And left the topic broad enough that those who were not initiated into the story of Max and Liz, well, they would not be looking between the lines.

Only she knew the warts of the story.

And those who were back in Roswell.

Because there was nothing simple between her and Max.

So, she stopped talking, and the doctor left frustrated at getting nothing out of her patient. “She’s not going to get better if she does not talk,” she said to a fellow doctor.

Liz knew this. She knew enough about the fragile mind.

But once the doors closed, she simply went silent until she spotted an image out of the corner of her eyes. A ghost story all right. “Max,” she said softly.

As she felt comforted by seeing someone who was not there…

Yeah, people had a right to be concerned about her.

But was her brain just trying to process something that did not make a lot of sense. And was it trying to tell herself something.

Why would she be seeing someone who was not there.

Who was dead.

Who could not come back to life.






It had happened before. But this was a different situation, and back in Roswell. Everyone was starting to question if they were taking the right tact in the situation because once word of Liz’s current state was making its waves around the gossipvine. They started to gather and start to talk. Because some were not happy with the situation as it was. “This is all our fault,” Maria muttered as she glared at her husband and stepfather. “If we had been honest with her…” she muttered. “She would not have admitted herself to some mental hospital.”

“We were trying to protect her,” Jim said softly. Of course, he knew there had been many ways around how they made the situation. None of them were expecting this result. The Liz Parker I knew was pretty strong he thought.

But the Liz Parker had not been shattered by the permanent loss of someone she truly loved.

“Well, we did a lousy job,” Maria muttered. “Extremely,” she said, and she had made that opinion clearly many of a times during the last three months, even before she had learned of the latest crisis. I am sorry Petunia.

“We thought it would be over by now,” Michael said softly. “But there are no bites out Yvonne,” he muttered as he asked the town Sheriff. “There was little that could have be done…”

“There was plenty we could have done,” Maria reasoned as she glared at her husband “We could have told her the truth. Keeping everything so secretive is not helping the situation. Making people believe what are making them believe is unfair, to everyone,” she muttered. “At least the children are children. We should be protecting them. Because Yvonne still could come after them. But Liz, Liz is different. She would want to protect the situation as it exists” she demanded. “We allowed this to happen.”

“We though we were making the right decision,” Jim sighed.

“We were,” Michael sighed. Because of course, he had gotten Maria’s side of it over the last three months. So, he had seen the darker side of his wife’s personality. She is not always sunshine he knew. Therefore, I want this over as much as anyone. “Anything from Deluca?”

“Nope,” Jim shook his head. As he knew now with Maria’s recent marriage, the only Deluca would be of the Sean variety. “She’s still down south,” he said softly as he looked at his stepdaughter. “Sean is on lookout.”

“Then it’s our fault that we let this happen,” Maria muttered as she did not know if her cousin was being level about the situation, as she got up from her chair because she was feeling a lot of emotion given the situation. As she prepared to storm out of the office. “Liz deserves to know the truth. Because if she knew the truth…”

“She would not have left…” Jim muttered. “She would not have let any of this happen…”

“Precisely,” Maria muttered. “She is going to be furious that we used her because we caused all of this hurt for her,” she sighed, because she knew there was no easy answer to any of this. Of course, there was one, and they had not thought it to be possible to use because they had not seen that it would have prevented so much of the hurt that had been caused by this. Therefore, they will be biting themselves in the end…


Because it would have been so easy.

“She’s going to be upset,” Michael acknowledged. “But there was one person who will be more pissed off when they find out how bad we have screwed this up for Liz…”

“That is true,” Jim acknowledged. “Who is going to tell him?

“I will,” Michael said solemnly.

Jim could only imagine the reaction that would be coming. “When you do see the individual that we are talking about,” he said with a sigh. “Tell him to be careful,” Jim warned.

“I will,” Michael sighed. “But I doubt it’s going to be help…” Once he knows Liz is hurting this much…




Unfortunately for Michael. He would not be having the talk he needed to be having right away, because life got in the way. And before he knew it, it was forty-eight hours later when he was making a very important drive. While Maria was at the Crashdown treating the three most important kids in her life to a dinner. While her mother helped Nancy run the restaurant with Jeff making a very important trip to the East coast. Over the last three months, Maria had spent a great deal with Ella and Noah Evans as they dealt with the devastating loss. So much change in their lives she could not help but think. And in this case, another child was joining them. Callie Jean Parker.

Because Maria was also taking time to spend with her because she knew that the eight-year-old did not know anything more then the newly turned nine-year-olds. The fact Max had to miss their birthdays is on us she thought.

But only a certain number of people would know it.

And certainly, the twins did not know what the adults knew. Or what certain adults knew. And Callie had been spending time with the twins since her arrival back in Roswell, and as a result they had become close friends. Which made Maria happy that the three had each other. But it is a very confusing situation for the kids, and I know it Maria thought. “How is school?” she asked the three.

Given the situation with Liz, Callie had begun the school year here in Roswell. Which is why Maria had spent so much time with her because she knew Jeff and Nancy had not bargained for parenthood at their stage in their life. Which is why Liz had taken in Callie in the beginning once they found out that Jeff’s long-lost son was a father, and the child had survived the crash that had taken both parent’s lives.

Fortunately, alcohol was not a factor in this crash, but it was indeed still a crash that had left two dead. And child without her parents, and she had moved in with her single biological aunt, and Liz would eventually adopt the orphan which made Callie legally a Parker.

But it was still a lot for Jeff and Nancy. So, when Callie showed up. Maria had helped them keep an eye on the child.

And then they received the call they had been dreading because they had known something was going on with Liz if she had sent Callie back to Roswell after keeping her away for so much of her life. But they had not known that her Petunia had been hurting so much. I am sorry Liz she muttered.

But because Callie had not gone back home, she had started the school year. She was still so young, switching schools up would not have a dramatic effect on her, she thought, not yet anyways. So, Callie was going to the twin’s school. Although she was a grade behind because of the slight differences in their ages.

“It’s cool I guess,” Callie said. “Although I miss my school back home.”

“I know you do,” Maria smiled. “One of these days you will be going back,” she said. “Your mother needed you to be here for now.”

I know Callie muttered, but she also did not know at the same time. “Is she okay?” Callie asked. She missed her mother. She did not get what was going on. All she knew was that she knew something was going on because she remembered how out of sorts her mother had been when she was back at home.

Which was unusual for her mother because as long as she knew her, and certainly as she was growing up and becoming more aware, she had only know her mother to be the straightest lace, put together woman on the planet.

She rarely saw her mother out of sorts.

Until she did.

And now I am back here because of it, Callie thought. Because she knew her mother had sent her away because she was a mess. But she did not know if her mother was doing alright because while they talked on the phone over the time apart, still she knew you can say one thing and be another when you were on the phone.

“She is going to be alright,” Maria could only mutter because she hated the situation.

“It is just I miss my mother,” Callie sighed, as she saw the frown on the twin’s face, both of them. “Sorry,” she sighed softly because she knew how much the twins missed their father. Ella and Noah often talked about Max to her. While they loved their aunt, and uncle in Kyle who had been helping Isabel with the twins since they all moved back into Isabel’s house after a month with their grandparents.

“It’s okay,” Ella muttered. Because she knew how much Callie missed her mother, and Ella thought she knew more than either her brother or best friend of the situation because she was a pretty good eavesdropping. Noah is no slouch either she knew, but her mother just did not get it like she did at times. Although she was too young to know it meant anything more than being a perceptive young girl. She was not up on the specialness of their abilities, not yet anyways Maria knew. “We miss Daddy,” she said softly.

“I suggest that you two remember the good memories,” was all Maria could say. “Your father was an incredible man,” she muttered as she hated to have to use the word, was.

Ella and Noah nodded. Still because they had a little interaction with Liz before the unspeakable happened, they could not help but be curious about the person who had brought a spark to their father’s eyes. At eight when everything happened, they of course did not know what it all meant. But they were getting a sense. “Is Callie’s mother coming back?”

“Yes, she is” Maria muttered. “One of these days,” she muttered because she did not know when. After all, Jeff had run out of the Crashdown and got on the first flight he could the day before, and flown to Bethesda, Maryland to help his daughter.

When asked, Nancy only would say that Liz was out of the hospital and Jeff was helping her. Which made Maria happy, but she missed her friend, and she hated how much she knew, and had not been able to tell her best friend. So, she hated how she might have helped accelerate her best friend’s state at the moment.

“One of these days,” Maria muttered.


One of those days was this one. And a call was preparing to pull up outside the Crashdown. Just as Isabel and Kyle were walking down the street to meet up with Maria and the kids for dessert. It had been a date night for them. One of the few since Isabel had taken over as the twin’s guardian, and they moved into her place. They had more of ability to go out before hand, but since, Isabel had not wanted to leave them for long.

“Fun movie,” Kyle was saying as they walked down the street.

“Yes, it was” Isabel smiled. She knew she and Kyle had needed. The last three months had escalated their relationship in ways that you would have thought would have happened long before since they had been doing this dance for more years than it was good to count at this moment, and yet they had kept things very slow until the last few months, which out of necessity had moved things a long way from where they had started.

It was not for her sake. But for the twin’s sake. Having two adults in the same house does wonders when you are dealing with two mischievous young children who don’t get why they don’t have their father in their lives anymore.

Noah and Ella had to get used to not having a mother, they should not have to get used not to having my brother in their lives Isabel could not help but think. But it’s this way because it has to be… Although some might quibble about the decisions that we have made she knew, but she had not been thinking straight at the time.

None of us were, and we had to act first…

So, having Kyle there for he once she and the twins had moved back to her home. After a month with her parents. Because like Max often found, being back in their childhood home for long sometimes led to clashes, not that Isabel did not understand things, but given the circumstances, and the help she had gotten with the twins, still though she could not have stayed there much longer, and so she, Ella and Noah had moved into her home.

Kyle followed.

Neither grown up knew if the arrangement would last once Isabel got over the hurdler of sudden parenthood. She had always been on record as the guardian for the twins if anything ever was going to happen to her brother, of course I would take the children if it became necessary, she would think.

She never imagined it would become a necessarily. And that Max could not help himself. Of course, not she now knew. He’s a healer, but he cannot help himself from the unimaginable she thought. So, she was rocked when she suddenly became a parent. She had always been the fun aunt. She never was the parent.

Now she was.

But it was supposed to be temporary, right? she thought of the reasons for it. That very few people knew about.

But unfortunately, they had just hit the three month point after this saga had begun. With no end in sight.

She desperately wanted to reach the end, if only for this to be over. And maybe we can go back to normal she thought. But then she had doubts that they would ever be able to go back to normal. Back to where life had been once.

“Maybe we can do it again soon,” Kyle murmured.

“Yeah, maybe” Isabel said softly as she tried to come back to today’s reality. “The kids are starting to feel more settled,” she acknowledged as saw the concern on Kyle’s face and knew he knew that she had been spacing out again. Something that was not a rarity. “I do appreciate how much help you have been to me,” she said with a sigh. “Kyle, you did not have to do all this for us.”

“I love you Isabel,” Kyle said. A sentiment that did not get said as much as he would like. Because neither wanted to think of how serious their current situation was and did not want feelings to get in the way of what needed to be done. But it was a reality for him. I love her he thought.

“I love you too” Isabel smiled. “I know it must be hard to love me.”

“I have loved you since we were teenagers,” Kyle smiled. “Even when I had to sit and watch you with Jesse, so I understand that things can be complicated,” he sighed with a smile. “I know how you were worried to go further with the two of us.”

“Because I did not want to screw up again.”

“You did not screw up the first time,” Kyle muttered. “Jesse was a good guy. But you were young, and we make mistakes we are young. We go into them thinking we know best, and unfortunately life has a way of showing us what it all is meant to be. You had a chance, and even though it did not work out. It should not scare you to try again, because it does not always have to go badly.”

“I know you are right” Isabel said. “I just wanted to make sure it was right the next time, I went there, because I went into a little too blindly with Jesse and look where it got me” she sighed. “I never want that feeling again.”

“A lot was going on back then.” Kyle conceded.

“Yes, there was” Isabel nodded. “I just don’t want to be rush into anything now, because of certain changes in my circumstances.”

“You have not rushed into anything,” Kyle said with a laugh, as he reminded Isabel that their courtship had not been exactly fast. “We have been doing this dance of us, for nearly the whole time we have been back in Roswell,” he said softly. “I don’t think anyone would describe us as going too fast.”

“You are right,” Isabel smiled. We are the definition of going slow she knew. “I know you wanted more…”

“I did,” Kyle said. “But I am where I want to be,” he said with a smile. “Sure, it is unconventional, but it works for us, and it’s up to us where we go from here” he allowed. “The last three months have been a change, sure, but we need to see it out, but once it’s all over, then…”

“Then what?” Isabel asked.

“Then we can see where we are at,” Kyle said with a smile. “I think we will know where we stand by the end of this, and where we want to be at” he said with a look that got Isabel to smile too, as he knew where he was at, and sensed he knew where Isabel was at, but you don’t rush her, and we do have all the time in the world.

“Life is short,” Isabel muttered. We have seen it too clearly.

“Yes, it is” Kyle agreed as they saw a car slowly come up the street and pause in front of the Crashdown “Uh oh,” he murmured.

“What?” Isabel asked.

“Someone’s back,” was all Kyle said as they witnessed the car pull up in front of the Crashdown. As someone is making their return, they both thought.

Which meant anything was possible now.

“This is not what we need” Isabel muttered.

“Jeff and Nancy don’t know what we know,” Kyle murmured. Hell Liz does not even know what we know he sighed. “They want to help their daughter. I bet Roswell is the last place that she wants to be.”

Isabel nodded.

“She misses your brother,” Kyle murmured.

It might help Liz to be back in Roswell because she can at least talk about Max with her family and friends.
I wonder if Maria will continue to keep the secret from Liz.