The Missing Piece (CC, MATURE/ADULT accepted)

[isabelle]

*Max*

Kyle bolts and I'm glad. I'm not at all sure how I'd be able to pull this off he were hanging around. Liz and I need the time alone. We need to really see how this works.

I see Liz carefully adjusting the vase so it fits the flowers as I shift my weight from one foot to the other. I can tell she's a bit nervous, too, although we do both know each other reasonably well now. Liz finally stops fussing with the flowers and sets the vase on the table. She compliments them again as she turns back to look at me again, but she doesn't seem to have anything else to say.

“I’m sorry, I guess I’m a little nervous…” she says. So…are you wanting to sit a while…or should we be going…or…I’m sorry…”

Her hestitant speech actually makes me feel a little better. "Yeah, I'm a bit nervous, too. Maybe more than a bit," I admit. I glance at the living room, giving a self-concious shrug. "We can sit for a while if you like. We don't have a schedule to keep. Or we can talk on our way. Whatever suits you," I tell her.

[KatnotKath]

~Liz~

I don’t know if Max could have said anything that would have made me feel better, than his admission that he’s nervous too… It makes me feel more as though we’re on a level playing field, we’re on the same square and we’re being honest…

Honesty is important to me, it always has been, even if in truth most of my life has been a lie. I think that was one of the reasons I took some of this so hard… But now I know the truth, and being honest with Max is important…

I know that I’m repeating my thoughts, but organising them in my head now takes enough effort on its own…

Max leaves the choice up to me as to what we have to do, and I have to think for a moment. Talking to him, just some normal conversation, holds some appeal I have to admit, but as he points out we can talk in the jeep, and if we wait much longer I don’t know if I’m going to be able to go through with this…

This morning I was surprised at how calm I felt… I went to school as normal, dealt with my lessons, even managed to talk to Kyle and some of the others at lunch… I don’t think it really hit me until I started packing my stuff up exactly what tonight was…

Not that I had forgotten about it all together of course…I don’t think that would be possible… But I guess I had managed to put it to the back of my mind to the extent that you think – oh that’s next week – and when I realised it wasn’t…

It’s not that I don’t like Max, and it’s not like I haven’t been on a date before, but this is so different… I feel like a little girl playing grown-up right now…and I guess I’m scared that he might see me for just that…

I chew on the inside of my lip nervously as I look up at him. “Maybe we should talk as we go…if we’re going to eat after we probably shouldn’t be too late…” I point out awkwardly.

[isabelle]

I hope this doesn't go too far for you... I'll be happy to edit if you like.

*Max*

"All right," I agree as Liz decides to head out immediately. I would have been perfectly fine if we had stayed and talked and even skipped the bowling completely, if that's what she wanted. But having a common activity, something to do with your hands and body, really does help make things a little less intense.

I step back and open the door for her, waiting for her to join me on the threshold. "Let's be on our way then."

There's so much I want to tell her. So much we need to say to each other. But it can't all happen at once. Talking in the jeep may be a bit less simple than here; it's not as private. But then, this isn't a day for talking about 'alien' things that would need intense privacy. It's just her and me. Maybe we can talk about the music on the radio or some other easy thing. We need that. We need to see if we're actually compatible.

Liz approaches with a nervous smile and I'm sure mine looks just the same. I resist the urge to offer her my arm. This is not that kind of outing. Instead, I merely make a sweeping gesture, allowing her to precede me through the door. I pull it shut behind me and then step aside, allowing her to lock up. I could have done it for her with my powers, but we're mindful of unseen eyes and she's used to doing it this way.

I'm parked only a few paces from the door and I open the car door for her, allowing her to climb in before shutting it and moving around to the other side to get in myself.

Starting up the engine, I remember my earlier thought. In the past few weeks, I've had some exposure to her musical tastes and they're not so different from my own. I've even given a pre-set to her favorite radio station, it's the one I now listen to after work, although I usually stick to my other stations for the morning. I'm pretty sure I remembered to change it as I drove up here, but it's not until I hear the sound of her favorite band come from the speakers do I realize, with relief, that I did.

"So, how was that physics experiment you were going to do today?" I ask, and then kick myself. I was hunting for a neutral topic, but talking about school just emphasizes the age difference between us. "Or is there anything else you'd like to talk about? Current events? Lousy customers at the diner?"

[KatnotKath]

~Liz~

I pick up my denim jacket, slipping it over my shoulders, and can’t help looking round a moment, my eyes resting for a split second on the picture of Kyle and I from last year… Things were so much simpler then…

I tear my gaze away, and swallow, forcing myself to look up, and offering as much of a smile as I can manage as I walk over to Max by the door. He indicates for me to go first, and I nod. “Thanks…”

We leave the apartment, and I could swear one of the curtains in the window opposite move slightly… Forcing myself to act normally, knowing that even if I am right it’s just some nosy neighbour, I turn back to the door as Max steps back upon closing it, pulling out my key and locking up.

Once I’m done I look back at Max, who gestures towards where he’s parked, and we walk over. Ever the perfect gentleman, he opens the door for me, waiting until I’m settled inside before closing it again and then coming round to get in the other side.

I sit in silence, not really knowing what to say as he turns on the engine and pulls away from the kerb. I suddenly realise my favourite band is playing on the radio, and smile. I begin to feel just a little bit more relaxed, and the smile on my face now is small but genuine.

"So, how was that physics experiment you were going to do today?"

I look over at him. I’m not too certain if I’m more surprised that he’s remembered, or that he's asked, but I guess I did mention it last time I saw him… I was a little nervous, the result being important, and even if I am good at science, things can always go wrong… “It was good…thanks…” I respond softly.

After this though, I lapse into silence, noting his apparent discomfort as he seems to struggle to find something else… Talking is all very well, but school isn’t exactly something I can ask him about… We need something general, that effects both of us… I shrug. “Well…work’s work…I guess…” I comment. It’s hard to believe that a month ago I didn’t think anything of the murals on the wall in there… Well, no, I thought they were tacky, but now I think they’re down right creepy…

It doesn’t change the fact that I need a job though, and I can’t afford to give up the one I have, so I just keep going… Most of the time Kyle’s there to take my mind of it of course, and when he’s not, well I just have to get by…

My shifts have turned into constant countdowns…never wanting to be there, hating every second of wearing that uniform as before, but now I really have a reason…

Then, I turn my attention to him, realising that I haven’t even asked how his day was… “How about you…was work okay…or…?” I trail off awkwardly, once again feeling a little tongue tied…

[StormWolfstone]

OOC: I know it's not the greatest...... I had the comp screw my posts again when I had some ready... so decided to simply keep it moving.


~Isabel~


“Well, I was just about to ask exactly the same thing…” Alex says, smiling. “We haven’t had a whole lot of time to ourselves lately, and I wondered if you might like to go out for a meal, or maybe get something to eat and take it out with us…” I have to admit, take out seems to sound better to me but even more so after he continues to suggest, “We could go stargazing…just you and me in the desert…” Alex's lips touch mine again and I instantly return the kiss. “What do you say…?”

I gave him one of my teasing smiles as I started, "Hmm, let me think. An evening in a resteraunt with lots of other people around? Or an evening where it's just me, the man I love and the stars? What a decision to have to make." I laugh softly and run a hand through his hair, "I'm thinking that we'd better find a good picnic type blanket and a regular blanket so we can gaze at the stars. What type of food do we want to pick up?" I ask, letting him make the decision since I could always bring along my condiment.

[isabelle]

*Max*

"Work was fine. It's not exactly challenging," I tell her. I'm still hoping for something better, but I haven't put in a lot of time on that yet. Between getting to know Liz and Kyle, and trying to find the pod-chamber, there hasn't been a lot of time...

The conversation continues to be a bit awkward as I drive through town to the only bowling alley in town. In a lot of ways, it's worse than those first conversations we had together, when I told her so much about who she is.

At first, I'm kicking myself mentally, trying to figure out what I'm doing wrong. I try to remind myself that all first dates are awkward. Maybe this isn't a sign of things going poorly, afterall. Maybe it's just normal. Normal isn't an easy thing to identify all the time. Not when so much of what's going on beneath the surface here is so very different from normal.

I turn into the lot and easily find a place to park. "Here we are," I say turning to Liz. It's a totally unnecessary comment and I feel like an idiot saying it, but there seemed to be little else to say.

"Do you want to eat first?" I ask, nodding towards the pizza place right next door. "Or shall we go play a few games?"

"Let's play," she says, unbuckling her seatbelt to get out of the car.

"Wait," I say and she stops, turning to look at me. Having already unbuckled my belt, too, I turn in my seat to face her a bit more. "Liz, I know we promised we'd be completely honest with each, especially tonight. Any first date would be awkward without ... everything-else," I say, gesturing with my hand to include all the issues that we're not talking about.

"If you're just here because the pressure to do it is greater than your reluctance, then we don't have to go through with it. We can just go bowling and forget the date. Or I can take you home," I tell her. I know we've talked about this before, but I just need to say it again. She shifts a little in her seat and I know she's probably about to protest that she is here because she wants to be. I stop her before she says anything.

"Before you answer, I want to do just one thing. I know we said no games, but I want you to try something." We've talked about choices. We've talked about honesty and figuring out what we really feel. But I think a little fiction might be the best way to find out the truth. "Just play a little game with me, okay? Can you try to pretend that we met a different way? That we were just two kids in school together. Or maybe we met at the supermarket or something. And we've hung out a few times. What would you have thought of me then? Would you have gone out with me when I asked?"

She looks at me, lightly biting her lip and I see the uncertainty in her eyes. I know I'm talking a lot and I hope I'm not scaring her, but I just want to try this. "I've thought about it. A lot," I tell her. I hesitate just a fraction of a second and then I reach over and touch her hand. I think it's what I would do without everything-else and I’m trying to figure out what the two of us are. "If it were like that, I probably wouldn't be telling you this yet, but I want you to hear it.”

I take a deep breath and go on, meeting eye-to-eye. “Liz, I think you’re beautiful. Your eyes are so deep and clear. I just love the way your hair moves. And you’re very smart. If we were in school together, I’d want you for my lab partner in every class. But more than that, I think you’re strong. You’ve been through so much and you’re still so vibrant and engaging. You’re amazing. That’s why I would ask you out. I’d want to see how to make you laugh and smile. I’d want to know what makes you sad, and what makes you mad. I’d just want to know you.”

I feel a smile growing on my face as I talk about her. Something about being with her makes me feel warm inside, and nervous, too. “You don’t have to tell me what you’d be thinking, but if you were just you, and Michael wasn’t breathing down our necks, do you think you’d say yes?”

[KatnotKath]

~Alex~

I shake my head inwardly as Isabel runs her hand through my hair. Even her touch has such an effect on me… I wonder every day what I did to deserve her… She loves me…she really loves me, and those few words sound more wonderful than anything I can ever imagine.

I smile as she suggests finding a picnic blanket, but the edge of my lips turn up further as she talks about another normal blanket. I wrap my arms around her and draw her close, wrapping my arms around her waist and pressing my lip against hers gently. “That sounds great…” I respond. “I’m sure we should be able to find something…”

Of course that goes without saying, given that she could always use her powers, but I’ll say it anyway…

As Isabel then asks about food, I shrug, not overly bothered as long as the important part of the evening is in place… Me, Isabel…alone…and that will never be anything less than perfect… “Hmm…well there’s pizza, chinese, mexican…and anything else you can think of…I’m happy with whatever, so what would ‘Madame’ like…?” I ask her in a slightly teasing tone, reaching up with my hand and using a finger to tease her lower lip a moment before replacing it with my lips again and kissing her deeply.

[KatnotKath]

~Liz~

I can’t say that Max looks any more relaxed, which in a weird way helps I guess, to know that we’re both in the same situation, but it doesn’t help us relax, and that’s something we need… The stilted conversation as we drive along is probably the worst we’ve had since meeting, and yet at other times I have felt so relaxed with him…

Of course it’s no secret why…

Then again, maybe this isn’t something that’s so weird… Maybe this is all part of a natural progression… It’s not like most the guys I’ve gone out with in the past were friends before, with the exception of Kyle of course, and maybe it’s that pre-existing ‘relationship’ which makes it more awkward…each of us nervous about losing what we already have built…

I shake my head inwardly, not really even sure if I am making any sense… Do I sound crazy…?

Somewhere along the line we seem to have drifted into an awkward silence, which Max finally breaks as he pulls up in the parking lot and announces we’re here. I respond with a small smile. “Yeah…we are…” I respond, wishing as soon as I’ve opened my mouth that I had kept it shut. Could I have sounded any more of an idiot…?

Luckily Max doesn’t seem to notice so much, and he asks me whether I want to eat first or play. As it happens, I’m not that hungry at the moment anyway, and I shake my head at his first. “Let’s play…” I smile again and reach down to unbuckle my seatbelt.

“Wait!”

Max’s voice causes me to turn back as I’m about to open the door. I see him turn towards me, and am about to ask what’s wrong. Before I get chance though, he speaks again…

"Liz, I know we promised we'd be completely honest with each, especially tonight. Any first date would be awkward without ... everything-else,"

He gestures with his hand, and I understand completely of course. Michael…Zan, Lareina… All the things this night isn’t about, and yet it’s difficult to forget them completely…

"If you're just here because the pressure to do it is greater than your reluctance, then we don't have to go through with it. We can just go bowling and forget the date. Or I can take you home,"

I swallow as I listen to what Max has to say, reiterating what he has said over and over… Not once has he pushed me, not once has he told me he’s tired of waiting… I shift in my seat slightly, moving so that I’m facing him more as I prepare to answer, assuring him that I didn’t say yes for Michael, or anyone else but me. I’m not here because of the pressure, however hard dealing with that might be sometimes, I want to be here…however nervous I might be feeling right at this moment in time…

Before I get chance to say any of this though, Max holds up his hand and stops me. "Before you answer, I want to do just one thing. I know we said no games, but I want you to try something."

I look at him and just wait for him to continue, unwilling to make any response for the moment until I know what he’s talking about…

"Just play a little game with me, okay? Can you try to pretend that we met a different way? That we were just two kids in school together. Or maybe we met at the supermarket or something. And we've hung out a few times. What would you have thought of me then? Would you have gone out with me when I asked?"

I look up at him, surprised by his question. I chew on the inside of my lip and swallow. This is the last thing I expected, and in all honestly, I’m not sure how to respond… It’s asking a lot… Things would be so much simpler if we had met at school, if we were the same age…

I don’t know whether Max realises I don’t quite know what to say, but he looks back at me. "I've thought about it. A lot," He tells me softly, appearing to hesitate a moment before reaching to take my hand.

I look down, surprised not by the gesture, but the feelings it causes. I feel confused, unsure. I’m so nervous about all this, and yet I guess deep down, there’s another part of me that’s excited… I want to be here, I’m not lying about that…

"If it were like that, I probably wouldn't be telling you this yet, but I want you to hear it.” Another deep breath, and then as I look up at him again, I find him staring right into my eyes. He begins to speak again, and as he does so, I feel a deep flush rising up my cheeks. “Liz, I think you’re beautiful. Your eyes are so deep and clear. I just love the way your hair moves. And you’re very smart. If we were in school together, I’d want you for my lab partner in every class. But more than that, I think you’re strong. You’ve been through so much and you’re still so vibrant and engaging. You’re amazing. That’s why I would ask you out. I’d want to see how to make you laugh and smile. I’d want to know what makes you sad, and what makes you mad. I’d just want to know you.”

There’s a smile on his face, and it’s unlike any I’ve seen before… Suddenly, just for a moment, he looks something like the theoretical kid he’s talking about…or at the very least, he looks his age… That premature maturity that has obviously been thrust onto him seems to melt away at least for the moment, and I feel a strange shiver run down my spine. It’s not cold…

“You don’t have to tell me what you’d be thinking, but if you were just you, and Michael wasn’t breathing down our necks, do you think you’d say yes?”

He asks me the question, and while a moment before I don’t know what I would have said, somehow now I find myself nodding without any hesitation. “Yes…I would…” I respond softly. “I like talking to you, I want to get to know you…” I shake my head, chewing again on my lip, looking down and fiddling with my fingers. Sometimes I feel like such a kid.... “I know this doesn’t sound half as eloquent as your words…” I take a breath and then force myself to look back up and meet his eyes once more. “I think about what it could be like sometimes…if we were togther…but I can’t deny I’m scared…” I stop, and try to clarify. “Not of you, but of all the expectation… I can’t help thinking that I’m just a kid, and you’re…well you’re not… You have all this experience, and I just don’t…” I shake my head, aware I’m not putting this very well. “All my life, I dreamt of having a real family… Even when I gave up, the dream was still there at the back of my head, a real family, people that wanted me, and that loved me… And now I have that, and I’m so scared that I’m going to make a mess of it…” I swallow and reach up to fiddle with my hair nevously as I wait nervously, aware that I’ve probably opened myself more just now than I have in the whole time we’ve known each other… We’ve talked about this before yes, but it’s just different…

[isabelle]

*Max*


Liz nods and softly says, “Yes…I would.” I can feel myself remembering how to breathe again. She would. It's good. Then she goes on, “I like talking to you, I want to get to know you,” she adds and then stops.

I feel something inside me freeze up at that. She wants to get to know me. Period. Nothing there to indicate that she's the least bit attracted to me. It sounds like it's purely a friend thing. I guess that answers the question I was going to ask next, about romance.

I try not to let my disappointment show as she shakes her head, looking for more words. She did say yes, afterall. She does want to be with me. I should just be glad for that.

“I know this doesn’t sound half as eloquent as your words…” she says. “I think about what it could be like sometimes…if we were together…but I can’t deny I’m scared … Not of you, but of all the expectation… I can’t help thinking that I’m just a kid, and you’re…well you’re not… You have all this experience, and I just don’t…

I watch Liz in amazement as she speaks, her voice growing more and more strained and upset as she goes along. My heart goes out to her, wanting to fix this, so she's not so sad. I want to tell her that I don't have that much experience, at least, not at love. I can't deny that I know a bit more about some things. But she goes on and I see that it's not the only thing on her mind.

"All my life, I dreamt of having a real family… Even when I gave up, the dream was still there at the back of my head, a real family, people that wanted me, and that loved me… And now I have that, and I’m so scared that I’m going to make a mess of it…” she says.

I'd never seen her so fragile. Here, I've been worried about romance and she's worried about losing so much more. "Oh, Liz," I whisper. This time, I don't even hesitate. I wrap my arm around her, pulling her close for a hug. "You're not going to mess it up. You're already part of the family. All you have to do is be yourself. Nobody needs you to do anything more. If you had to be perfect, we'd have kicked out Michael long ago. And me, too," I add a crooked grin. "I'm not perfect, either."

I try to be. I try so hard to be the leader and king that Nacedo has trained me to be, but it's not easy. I don't always get it right, not even after all these years...

I stroke Liz's hair trying to figure out how to assure her. "I've sometimes worried that you'd decide you don't even want to be part of the is crazy group. But we do want you, Liz. I want you. Nothing you do is ever going to change that. I promise."

[KatnotKath]

~Liz~

“Oh Liz…”

I suddenly find myself pulled into his arms, but to my surprise perhaps, I don’t feel even a little uncomfortable… In fact, being there, with him…feels right, in a way I can’t truly explain…

As he tells me that I’m not going to mess it up, reassuring me that I’m already part of the family, and telling me just to be myself, I feel the edges of my lips turning up in something of a smile, and at his comment about Michael and himself I can’t help laughing.

Suddenly, amazingly enough, after opening myself completely like that, I feel more comfortable than I have in the whole evening…

“I’ve sometimes worried that you’d decide you don’t even want to be part of this crazy group. But we do want you Liz… I want you… Nothing you do is ever going to change that. I promise…”

I look up at Max, thinking once more about everything…

He wants me… I run the words over in my head… I meant what I said, I’m scared about what’s expected, but in truth, I can’t say I’m scared of him… If he was two years younger, and there was none of this background, I don’t suppose I would be even hesitating. I like him, and if I’m honest to myself, I like him in a ‘more than a friend way’…

I bit my lip and shake my head although I don’t try and pull back from his arms. “I’m sorry…you probably think stupid getting upset like this…” I murmur softly, my words part muffled as I bury my head in his chest. “I’m sorry Max… I do like you…I more than like you…” I break off at this admission, blushing and swallowing. “You’re handsome, you’re warm and caring and…” I pause a moment before finishing in almost a whisper. “Your arms are a very comfortable place to be…”

I fall silent a moment, and then it dawns on me exactly what I just said. I meant every word, but… I swallow, feeling extremely awkward and nervous – probably exactly how a sixteen year old girl would be expected to feel after just admitting she ‘liked’ someone… Pulling back, and hardly giving Max a chance to respond, I try to focus on something… anything…that is going to stop my heart pounding at a hundred miles an hour. The bowling alley…playing… “I-uh…guess we should be going inside…if we’re going to get some games…”