Roswell Fanatics

~* Kyle *~

When Tess mentions Max helping her, I can't stop the stab of hurt and jealousy from running through me but when Tess mentions Isabel as well, I relax. That means that Max and Tessare not going to be alone while researching. That's a relief.

"Not everyone has as supportive a family as I do." Tess finishes off and reaches for my hand. I intertwine my fingers with hers in a show of support. I'll always be there for her, no matter what. I know she needs comfort and security right now but I'm not ashamed to admit that Tess gives me comfort as well. I guess it works both ways.

"So, class?" Tess asks as we make our way down the hall.

I nod. "Sure." I look at the watch and notice that we're already late. "Though, class started 10 minutes ago. If you're not up to it, we can skip it."

~*TESS*~

Kyle mentions skipping class and I think I visibly sigh with relief. I normally want to blend in and do what I'm supposed to, but the thought of sitting in class, pretending like life is normal is just too much to take.

'Do you mind?' I ask. 'I would love to just sit in the sun for a little while. It would be great if you would sit with me. Maybe we could go to the park? We could be back in time for second period.

~* Kyle *~

I hesitate, considering Tess's offer. It's tempting but I can't help thinking that she may want to bewith Max right now rather than me. Maybe she's just being polite. But then I see the hopeful look on her face and shake my head to clear any doubts.

She wouldn't have asked otherwise if she hadn't wanted to be with me. Atleast I hold on to that thought as I nod and say, "Why not? We'll walk. It's not that far away. That okay with you?"

When Tess nods, I smile at her and quickly lead her outside. We don't want to be caught. Once outside, we start walking in the direction of the park, letting the silence fall between us. There's so much I feel the need to ask her, to talk to her about but I can't seem to be able to, afraid of the answers I'll get. The burning question on my mind is...why Max? But of course I can't ask her that and I don't want to ruin the day by asking it.

Instead I say, "Have you thought of a name?" When Tess looks at me in surprise, I shrug, a little embaressed. "Well, I know it's early but knowing you girls you have names for your kids planned out year ahead."

~*~Michael*~*

I was just barely getting into the school when I saw Liz heading out, 'strange,' I thought. Still, I had a feeling I knew what it was about and even though I was certain that she probably wouldn't want anything to do with me, I decided to say the hell with it and was going to follow her. I stopped, just inside the exit and took a moment to think before I shook my head. I doubted that Liz would want to talk with me so I decided that it was better for me to simply mind my own business and get to class so I could talk to Max as I had planned.

Walking in, I sat down and just simply glanced around trying to decide what to do until he arrived, though it really didn't take long. When Max walked in, I noticed that he avoided looking in my direction and felt the urge to reach out and shake him. Did he really think that avoiding me was going to keep things from being said that needed to be said? Taking a few deep breaths, I calmed myself, reminding myself of what conclusion Isabel and I had finally come to late last night.

Leaning over the side of the desk some, I said simply, "Maxwell, we need to talk." I gave him a look that I hoped would convey that I was serious and wasn't going to be put off.

*Max*

I trudge to class, not at all sure what I’m thinking or feeling anymore. I’ve learned to live with the pressure of feeling responsible for the group, something I felt long before being told I was supposed to be the leader, but this is something even more. The baby. My parents. Liz. Alex’s death. Alien assassins. Liz. Pregnancy books. I shake my head trying to clear the thoughts swirling around and around.

When I get to class, I head right on in. “Mr. Evans. You’re ten minutes late,” Mr. Russo tells me. That’s really the least of my worries.

“Sorry, Mr. Russo,” I mumble in a semblance of normal. I don’t really want to be here in school at all. I’d love to take a week off and just think things through, but I go through the motions of a normal day, like always. It’s just an extension of the act I’ve used every day of my life. The act that I’m a normal person. Now, I just add that act that the other circumstances of my life are normal. At least, I try.

Suddenly, I remember that Michael is in this class. No Liz, but Michael is supposed to be. His seat is almost next to mine, although he's usually not here. Naturally, today he is.

Remembering how things went last night, I avoid meeting his eyes. Ms. Topolsky said that I had walls up around myself. Sure, she wasn’t really a guidance counselor, but what she said made sense. I have walled people out to keep them from knowing too much about me. Until I healed Liz, I hadn’t let anyone in except those who were already there: Isabel and Michael. But last night, they were the ones building the walls. Shutting me out. Isolating me with their silence. I strengthen the walls from the inside now, not wanting to face him again and see that look in his eyes.

"Maxwell, we need to talk," he says.

I try not to look, but I do. He looks serious. I nod, trying to keep my face equally serious, although I'm also feeling sad. What could he feel the need to tell me today that he refused to say last night? I really don't need him to tell me how stupid I was or how dangerous things are now. I already know all that. But if he wants to talk, we'll talk.

"Okay," I tell him. "After class?"

.

I Hope this works...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~Isabel~~

After trying to sit in class for five minutes or so, my mind simply didn't want to focus. I'd already nearly walked past my class and now I couldn't even focus on anything around me. With a sigh, I stood and ignoring the teachers call, walked out of class and made my way out of the school. I didn't have any idea where I was going to go, but I knew that I was wanting to get out of there before I had anyone asking too many questions or lost it. "When will we be able to live normal lives?" I mutter to myself as I walk away from the school building.

As I strode down the rode, I was aware of nothing else. Being in school was too much, so maybe I should take the counselor up on her offer. I only need half a credit and could graduate early. It would help me get away from the memories and I have been looking into different colleges. I could get away from Roswell, away from the drama of everyday life. It would be so much easier on me. Still, as I thought this I knew Max would never allow it and I also felt guilty for even thinking it with what my brother was going through.

I was so lost in my thoughts, I almost walked right past Liz who was leaning against a tree and looking for all the world as though she had been torn apart. I guess in a way, that's exactly what's happened to her. Putting aside my doubt that she'd talk to me, since after all, she hadn't talked to any of us since Alex died, I walked over to her. "Liz? Is everything alright?" I ask, hoping that she won't mention Alex or anything else like that, knowing that if I heard his name right then, I would end up breaking down.

~~Michael~~

I was expecting to be ignored or something, but I was surprised when Max actually looked over at me and nods before giving a response, "Okay," he started. "After class?"

I was silent for a moment, wondering what else he might be feeling. Hell, I was wondering what he was thinking. I half expected him to be angry or something after the way Isabel and I had been the night before. Yet, he was showing no sign of that. Finally, I nodded. "That'll work."

I straightened in my seat and looked around to see that there were some strange looks being directed at me. I knew why, I hadn't been in this class for a couple of weeks so for me to be here was rather unusual. It wasn't that I couldn't handle school, it was simply because I liked sleep better.

I glanced back over at Max, again wondering what he was thinking and such. I couldn't help but wish that class would end so we could get this talk over with as soon as possible. After all, Max in a lot of ways, was like a brother to me and I couldn't help but feel guilty about the way I'd been the night before. He and Isabel had always been there for me, yet at a true test, I hadn't been the same. It was a pretty crappy way for me to return the favor.

~Liz~

You know a little while ago, the idea of me skipping class would have been unheard of… I was the good student…I got A-grades, never missed a day of school, always got my work in on time… Well, I guess most of that stuff is still true, although there have been occasions when I’ve skipped class to ‘save the world’…and Vegas of course…but each and every time, Max had been involved… I sigh. Well I guess you could argue he is this time couldn’t you…after all he’s part of the reason I’m out here instead of in class… Tess…the baby…Max…Alex… Everything’s just getting to be way too much. I don’t even have Maria that I can go to at the moment since she’s still annoyed at me because I got Sean into trouble. Not that I blame her of course…he’s her cousin, and he’s back in prison because he helped me break into the school… I’m not heartless, I do feel bad about that…and I hate what it’s done to our friendship… I’m caught up in my thoughts, and don’t see Isabel walking up, not knowing that she’s there until she speaks, alerting me to her presence…

“Liz? Is everything alright…?”

I almost feel like laughing… I think Isabel knows full well that I’m not alright…and I doubt that I ever will be again… This whole thing is such a big mess…and then there’s the loss of Alex… Sometimes I just feel like I’m falling apart…I don’t know how I’ll cope… I sigh and look over at her, giving a wry smile. “Not really…but what’s new…?” I realise that it’s as unusual for Isabel to be skipping class as it is for me, and I look at her curiously. “So…how come you decided to escape…?” I ask softly. I know that she might be going to try and get me to talk about things, but I’m not too sure if that will work or not…I guess I’ll try and avoid it, but if it comes to it, I’ll just have to wait and see…

~* TESS*~
"Have you thought of a name? I know it's early but knowing you girls you have names for your kids planned out year ahead."

'I've thought about names, but I also don't know how to choose'
I don't mention the fact that there might be some sort of protocol as this child is supposedly the next generation of royalty. I don't want to think about that and I don't want to bring up Max again.

'Umm, Kyle? Could we talk about something else? Something besides the baby, or Alex, or anything difficult?' I don't realise until I finish but tears begin to well in my eyes and by the time I'm done I have to blink hard to keep them from spilling onto my cheeks.

He squeezes my hand gently and smiles. We continue walking in silence for a moment and I take a deep breath and relax. I try desperatly to think of some topic that we normally talk about that's safe and then I realise how silly I am.

'So, how's baseball?'

*MAX*

I turn back to my books and to the teacher after Michael agrees to talk after class. I continue my act of being a normal attentive, if somewhat quiet, student. Most of the people in class don't know me well enough, nor do they care, to notice anything different. Michael might be watching for something, but I'm not going to let him see.

I feel so alone. Like the alien I've always been, but this is different. Harder. Alex is gone. Dead. Liz is gone. Maria is mad at Liz, but I'm sure she's even madder at me for hurting her. And Isabel and Michael - they weren't even there, not really. And Tess - she's there, I know she is. But she's counting on me to be strong, to support her. To find the way to make this work. And she still has Kyle. I try to force myself not to be jealous of that.

I could use a little support myself, but I don't expect it. Not any more. My shoulders sag ever so slightly. I can almost feel the extra weight there. Isabel's words give me some hope, but I don't want to lean on her too hard. I don't want her to change her mind.

And Michael? I guess I'll find out what's on his mind soon enough. When class is over. With Michael, it could be anything. It's easy to keep my eyes front and not look at him, although I know I can't put it off forever.