Like to Roswell Role Play? Like to roleplay for other shows too? Like writing fic, but want to write with others and play off their writing? Then you'll like this place
ooc - of course it works.
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*MAX*
"What do you want to talk about then…?” she asks.
It sounds simple enough. It would be simple if I actually knew the answer to that. What do I want to talk about? I don't know. That's why we need to talk. To find out what it is that I don't know. Because it is something. Ms. Brennan. The unbreakable box. The strange flashes. It's all something. But I don't know what it is.
I shake my head. "Liz. There's something going on. I don't understand it, but I think you do. Can't you tell me? If it's part of you, I want to be part of it, too." I pause for a moment, staring into those incredibly soulfull eyes. I hope she knows I'm not just prying for no reason. That I only want to know her completely. To be part of every part of her, just like she's in every part of me. "I love you, Liz."
I'm scared about what he might ask, but I know one thing, I'm not going to lie to him...not again... This has all gone far enough and given the way I feel about him I won't continue to put him in danger by keeping him in the dark. I'd rather talk to Serena first, but I'm doubting that's going to happen so I guess I'll just have to hope she won't hate me for giving up our secret... Chewing my lips nervously I look over at him, waiting to see what he will say.
Finally I see him shake his head. "Liz. There's something going on. I don't understand it, but I think you do... Can't you tell me? If it's part of you, I want to be part of it too..."
He looks at me and I hate the fact that I've kept quiet for so long. "I'm sorry..." I tell him softly.
"I love you, Liz..."
His words make me smile and I look back at him, meeting his gaze fully. "I love you too..." I tell him softly before taking a breath. "And I want you to know me..."
*Max*
At her words, I want to automatically say that I DO know her, better than anyone. I mean, I’ve seen her memories, I’ve shared so much with her. But the truth is, the last 24 hours have shown that I don’t know her. Not completely. There’s something more to her that I haven’t been invited to share, until now.
“I want that, too,” I tell her, simply.
~Liz~
I look down, fiddling with my hands as I try to work out how to start. This is difficult...I'm ready to do this...I need to do this...but that doesn't mean it's easy. I have been taught all my life to keep this a secret and opening up like this goes against all that. Finally I look back up at him, forcing myself to face him even though I'm worried about what he might say. "You're not the only one with a secret Max...I have one too, but I want to share it with you..."
*Max*
I can see how terribly hard this is for her, and I almost feel angry at myself for putting her through it. But she did say she wanted me to know. I think I need to hear this. I take her hand and lead her gently to the row of boxes by the wall. “Sit down. It’ll be okay,” I tell her. I smile as she does so, and take a seat beside her. I put one arm around her shoulders and pull her close for a gentle squeeze. “Nothing you tell me will ever change the way I feel about you. And if you need help, I’ll be there for you all the way.”
~Liz~
Max is so sweet, so caring... I've lied to him for so long, and he must know that by now...and yet he doesn't even consider walking away. Drawing strength from his embrace and the proximity of his body, I look up at him again. "I'm going to tell you some things that are going to see unbelievable to you, but I need you to believe me...I know it might be asking a lot, but I need you to do this for me...please...?" I wait a moment, needing to see him acknowledge this before I can go any further...
*Max*
“Unbelieveable?” I repeat. “You’re talking to a living, breathing Roswell alien. I think I can keep an open mind.” I can’t even imagine what she’s going to say. Will it explain the box? Ms. Brennan? The strange visions? Could she be some sort of alien, too? I all but hold my breath, waiting for her to continue.
~Liz~
Under any other circumstance I'd be laughing at Max's response, but right now I'm rather too tense. This is it...this is where I come clean... I'm still unsure of how to continue though, this is so difficult, I mean where do I start... I open my mouth to speak, still really unsure as to what I'm going to say. "At the risk of sounding like I'm copying you...I guess you could say I'm not exactly normal..." I begin hesitantly.
*Max*
‘I have a secret.’ … ‘Not exactly normal.’ This isn’t really explaining anything yet. So she’s not normal. There have to be a thousand ways to be not normal, but I’m sure it doesn’t matter, whatever it is. I’m not normal, either. What’s so great about normal, anyway? I put my free hand over hers and gently rub her knuckles with my thumb.
“Okay…” I tell her, hoping to prompt her to continue.
~Liz~
I chew my lip. "This is going to sound crazy whatever I say Max, but believe me, this is the truth..." I look down, fiddling with my hands and try to find the words to say what I need to. There's so much I need to say, but I guess that I'll start with a simply statement. "I'm a witch..." As I finally say this I hold my breath, waiting to see what his reaction will be.
*Max*
“A witch.” I say, trying to figure that out. Does she mean she’s psychic or something? I mean, I know she can get flashes and stuff from me since I healed her. Then again, there were those flashes of ‘cooking’ with Ms. Brennan, and apparently blasting someone on her balcony. I shake my head slowly. “What do you mean by that?”
~Liz~
I can't help laughing at the confused look on Max's face. Reaching out, I take his hand. "I mean, that I have powers, and I use those powers to protect people..." I pause a moment. "I don't fly around on broomsticks, or anything like that, but I do cast spells..." It's strange, but since all this is just part of me, I'm struggling to work out exactly how to explain it all... I look upat him. "I'm sorry, I should have told you before...I wanted to...I just-" I break off, not really sure what to say and worried that if I say anymore I'm going to reveal Serena and Ainsling too... If he asks, the situation is the same, I won't lie...but until I speak to them, I won't volunteer that specific information, it's not fair on them, this is their secret too and just because I'm revealing myself doesn't mean I have to do the same for them...
*Max*
Listen to this, I’m feeling faintly dumbfounded. “You mean, real magic?” I say.
Hexes and lucky charms and dancing naked in the dark of the moon? I thought she was a scientist. How could she believe stuff like that? I’m about to blurt out something like that, but thankfully stop myself. Afterall, I know how much of the common ‘knowledge’ about aliens is false. And I am talking to Liz, and she had promised me the truth. If she believes this, there has to be something more to it.
”How is that possible?” I ask. I hope that sounds like I’m keeping an open mind. I did promise her that.
~LIz~
From the look on Max's face I can tell that he's having trouble accepting this and I can understand that, it's a lot to take in. But, to give him credit, he stays true to the promise he made, trying his best to keep an open mind. Slowly, I nod in response to his question. "Yeah, I mean real magic...not the wicca stuff or anything like that...not love spells or lucky charms cos they tend to cause a lot more trouble than they're worth though..." I look down awkwardly as he asks me how it is possible. What do I say...? I shake my head. "I can't really answer that Max...it's just part of me...it's part of who I am and I'm hoping desperately that it's not going to make you turn away..." I bite my lip and wait, not wanting to say any more before I've heard what he has to say...
*Max*
The love spells are no good. Yeah. Sure. Okay.
Should I be glad to know she didn’t use any magic to make me fall in love with her or should I be running away? Am I still on the same planet? No matter what the answer, I know I can’t leave Liz. It would be easier to leave my right foot.
I’m watching Liz as she speaks and I can see how sincere she is. This is something real. Or at least, something she believes is real.
Then again, how can I continue to doubt it, considering what I’ve seen in the flashes. And my strange struggle with the box at lunch time.
“… Well,” I say at last. “I guess that could explain some of the weird things I’ve seen in the flashes…”
~Liz~
Even if I hadn't guessed before now, Max's words tell me that he's received more than one flash about all this and I need to know what else he's seen. "What did you see...?" I ask him softly. I can see that he's still unsure what to think about all this to an extent and that I can understand. The thing I feel so relieved about is that he's not moving away though. He might be apprehensive about all this, but he's not rejecting me, and that's a start. I know that I haven't given him any chance to answer my first question, but there's something I have to make sure that I say. "This doesn't change the way I feel about you Max...not one bit...I love you, that's why I needed to tell you this...because you're the only person I can ever imagine being with, and because I don't want there to be any secrets between us anymore..."
*Max*
I shake my head, trying to figure out how to answer Liz’s question. What did I see? I’ve seen so many things that don’t make sense. Probably not all of them are related to this, but which ones are?
Before I can decide where to start, she’s professing her love again – promising no secrets. I smile, thinking of how much I love her, and of all the secrets I’ve already told her about me. Most of the secrets I’ve also shared with Serena and Alex and Maria, but not all. I know she’s seen things she hasn’t repeated to others. We’ve discussed far more personal things. Private things.
“No secrets,” I agree, although that one cuts close. I do have a big secret from her now. Sneaking into her room. Trying to open the box to see the book. I’ll need to tell her about that, somehow. I only hope she won’t hate me for it. I had been thinking only something alien could frustrate my powers that way, but I guess magic is another way.
“Our powers would certainly seem like magic to most people….” I say slowly, realizing too late that I’m thinking aloud. I wonder if magic is really something to do with advanced science. Or even alien powers. But the look in her eyes quenches that line of thought for the moment. I don’t want to start explaining it all away before I even know what it is. “Let me start by asking the same thing you asked me,” I say. “You said you don’t do love spells or whatnot. What exactly can you do? You said you help people. What people? How?”
There's something there in the back of Max's eyes as I tell him I don't want there to be any secrets between us anymore...He says that he agrees, but although I can't quite put my finger on it, I know that there's something wrong. Before I have a chance to ask him about this though, I hear him make a comment about his powers seeming like magic. I think that he's looking for some way to explain what I've just told him... I can understand that, but I'm pretty much stuck for anything to say. I don't know that magic can be explained away...I've tried enough times but I've never really come up with an explanation. "I don't know Max...all I know is that whatever people might think, magic isn't something which belongs in fairytales..." I tell him softly.
I'm fairly sure that I see him nod before opening his mouth and beginning... "Let me start by asking the same thing you asked me..."
I nod, thinking of that day when he told me about himself. I've wanted to reveal myself ever since then...wanted to show him that I trust him just as he trusted me, and now that time has finally come...
"You say that you don't do love spells and whatnot. What exactly can you do? You said you help people...what people? How...?"
His questions sound pretty simply but they cover so much...where do I start...? I take a breath. "Well I guess you could say that one of my powers is a little like Michaels..." I begin. "The other is related to the flashes I got last night... I see the future, and past sometimes..." I know that I'm not explaining very well, but I'm still searching for the right words...
*Max*
Like Michael’s, she says. That might explain what looked like Serena and her blasting someone on her balcony. But then, flashes of the future and the past.
“I thought your flashes were because of what I did to you?” I say. It should be a statement, but my confusion makes it a question. I thought it was kinda cool that we shared that, although I’ve always felt a little guilty about somehow changing her. But now, is she telling me she could do this before?
~Liz~
Max sounds confused and I know why. He thought that the flashes we got were because of what he did...because of him healing me... I still think that some of them are, they're not the same as my visions... I shake my head, still trying to work that out myself. "I can't explain it Max...some of the flashes, like the ones last night, are more like my visions...but others, like when I saw you as a little boy...I don't think they have anything to do with my powers, I think that's just because it's you and me..." I run my hand through my hair and shake my head again. "I'm sorry Max...I wish I could give you a better answer, but there's plenty of stuff I don't really understand myself...I can tell you what I know, but I can't do any more than that..."
*Max*
I nod, trying to process the things Liz is telling me. I certainly can sympathize with not having answers about who she really is and how she does what she does. Michael, Isabel and I don’t really know anything about where we come from. We have good reason to believe we’re aliens, but we don’t even know if that’s actually the truth. Never mind where we’re from or why. But Liz does indicate that she has some new abilities from being with me. Or maybe they’re mine – giving her the visions. I’ve never really known for sure what makes her see these things.
“So, this is something natural, then. Not something you had to be taught.” I say. “How is it different than me and Isabel and Michael? Is it possible we’re like you?” It doesn’t really make sense. There’s still the pod chamber and being born as six-year-olds. Liz hasn’t said anything like that applied to her. Surely she’d have mentioned it in September, if it did….
~Liz~
I nod slightly. "It's something I was born with...I was taught to control it, and I was taught how to use the spells, but the visions...and the other...it's always been there..." I'm phrasing my answer carefully, trying desperately not to give him any clue about Serena. I remember when we were younger...our training was just like playing...she'd freeze something and I'd blow it up...then mom would have to put it all back together... I smile at the thought for a moment, then a picture of mom enters my mind and I have to bite my lip, trying to hold back a cry. We were so young when she died, but I still miss her so much...
Max looks at me and I can see that there's a million thoughts going through his head at the moment. "Is it possible that we're like you...?"
He sounds almost hopeful...after all, it would tell him who he was, something that I know he and the others long for but as much as I hate it, I have to destroy that illusion. "I don't think so Max...I
might have powers, but I'm also completely human... My mom carried me and Serena just as anyone else would...there's no danger of me giving blood or anything like that. I don't know that I'm explaining my reasoning very well Max, and I'd love to be able to agree with you about this, but I don't think that you are..."
*Max*
I realize that Liz is right. She’s seen my blood. She knows it’s not normal. If hers were the same, she wouldn’t have had all those questions about me. “Yeah, you’re right,” I say with a sigh. I wonder if we’ll ever know anything about what I really am, where I’m really from.
I try to pay attention to all that she had said. Something about being taught to control it. And also, her insistence that it isn’t Wicca. “You said you were taught. What I saw last night. You and Serena and Ms. Brennan cooking something that exploded. That was a magic lesson?”
~Liz~
Max asks me the question and I know that I won't lie to him again. This is Serena's secret, and Ainsling's too...but I can't keep it any longer... Taking a deep breath, I force myself to look up t him and nod. "Ainsling was sent to help us...she taught us to make potions and cast spells...I know it sounds like something completely crazy, something off TV, but this is who I am...who we are... We don't get a choice in it..."
*Max*
“I sure understand that,” I say, giving Liz another squeeze. Nobody can help who they are. And if that comes with special abilities then that’s just something that has to be accepted and dealt with. So, Ms. Brennan is a witch, too. I wonder if this has something to do with our scheduled meeting this afternoon. It seems likely, but before I ask, I have another question.
“You said you help people. What’s that about? Who do you help, and how?” I was really glad to be able to use my powers to help Liz and to help Mom. I’ve helped others in secret ways, too, but nothing big. Not when we have to be hiding from the Sheriff and the FBI and the military and the world.
~Liz~
'How do I help people...?' It sounds like such a simple question but it's way way way more complicated than that. "If you're going to understand that, you need to know that witches aren't the only thing which people think belong in story books which are in fact real... Demons and warlock are real too...they're dangerous and deadly, and as well as attacking people like me, Serena and Ainsling, they also try to hurt innocent people like Maria and Alex. We protect those people...we fight those demons and sometimes even kill them. Warlocks come after us and we fight them...we do anything we can, even though sometimes it's not enough..." I trail off, trembling a little as my thoughts are brought back to my long dead mother who did exactly that...she gave her life to try and protect the innocent she had to save...
*Max*
Demons and warlocks. It was all a bit much to take. It sounded like warlocks were bad, not just male witches, as I'd thought. And did wizards fit in there somewhere, too? Liz implied that demons attacked people regularly. How, I wonder, did this never make it into the newspapers?
“Do Maria and Alex know about this?” I ask. They're her best friends. And they may have been attacked by demons. Of course they must know, I think. No wonder Maria was so afraid of us. And I'm the one on the outside, like Alex was about my secret...
Slowly, I shake my head in response to Max’s question. Goodness knows I’ve wanted to tell them so many times but I always told myself I couldn’t…that it wasn’t my secret to tell because it involved so many others. Of course that’s all still true, and I’m stood, or rather sat here telling Max… I bite my lip. It feels so good to know that I don’t have to hide what I am from Max…to know that this secret isn’t going to destroy us, but at the same time I feel so guilty… I’ve gone against everything I’ve ever been told. I’ve broken one of the most basic rules and I’ve revealed Serena and Ainsling too. I just hope that the two of them will understand. Taking a breath, I look up at Max. “Rule one is that you don’t tell anyone…and until today, I’ve obeyed that rule…” I tell him softly.
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Rule one ... you don't tell anyone. Funny, that had always been our first rule, too. But I broke it for Liz, and now she was doing the same. I squeeze her gently. "I understand that," I say, unnecessarily. I'm sure she's already thought of that.
I'm guessing I know something of what she's feeling now. I remember how I felt after I'd told her. I thought I could trust her, but I was still afraid. Especially when I saw the confusion in her eyes, and then she ran off without even assuring me.
I lean over and kiss her gently on the forehead. "It'll be okay. Your secret is safe with me. I won't even tell Michael and Isabel. I promise." If she'd kept Maria and Alex out of it, then who was I to share it? Besides, I wasn't even sure they'd believe me. Heck, I still wasn't really sure what it all meant.
That rule’s just the same as the one Max, Isabel and Michael had, and I’m sure that Max won’t miss that. He broke it to tell me about him, and now I’m breaking it to tell him my secret. The thing is that it feels so right. I’m not saying that I don’t feel guilty, because I do…it’s not my place to reveal my sister’s secret, or Ainslings’, but that’s exactly what I’ve done… What is right though, is that I’ve finally opened up to Max, that I’m finally allowing him to see the real me…
Of course that doesn’t mean that I’m not nervous about how he’s taking it… I mean it’s a big thing, and although I haven’t said as much yet, I’m sure that he’ll have worked out that by being with me he is in more danger than he would be without… He squeezes my hand though, and I look up, trying to gage his reaction and feelings from his expression on his face.
Unfortunately that doesn’t tell me an awful lot. There’s amazement and confusion in his eyes still and I know that it’ll take some time for him to get to grips with all this…it’s a lot to take in… Suddenly, he leans over and kisses my forehead though and I know that it’ll be ok…
“It’ll be okay. You’re secret is safe with me. I won’t even tell Michael and Isabel. I promise.”
That makes me feel guilty again. I made the same promise that day he told me about himself and the others, and yet in the end I told Maria and Alex. I know that I didn’t really have any choice…I told them to prevent them going to Valenti both times, but it doesn’t stop me feeling I should have tried harder…
I smile and look up, reaching up hesitantly to press my lips against his briefly. “Thank you…” I whisper to him. “I’m sorry I kept this from you so long…it was never a case that I didn’t trust you, it was just, with Ainsling and Serena being involved too…” I trail off. To say nothing of the other witches all over the world… “I just couldn’t think of it as simply as what I wanted…not at first anyway…” I take a breath and bite my lower lip nervously, not sure whether or not this is all coming out right.
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"...it was never a case that I didn’t trust you, it was just, with Ainsling and Serena being involved too…” Liz struggles to explain and I can't help but smile.
"I understand completely," I tell her. "It's why I never told you about me, although I've wanted to do it for years." Almost since the day I first saw her in third grade. I loved her then, but I didn't dare allow myself to show it, because of who I am. But I wanted to, with everything in me.
I feel closer to her than I ever have before. This is the secret that had been pushing me away these last couple days, and now, it's gone, bringing us together, instead. It's amazing how alike we two really are. Sharing secret powers. Keeping such a great secret from all but a very few. Afraid to tell anyone. Not only for fear of being disbelieved, rejected or feared, but also to protect the others who are different, like us. It's utterly amazing to me. That I would have fallen in love with someone who might be able to really understand all that I've been living with all these years... that she has been feeling the same things...
I put my arm around her waist, leaning close as I feel her head against my shoulder. "Does this have anything to do with our meeting with Ms. Brennan this afternoon, then?"
A part of me has become very cynical over the years...I guess you could say it's natural given everything that we've been through but it's not something I want to be. I don't want to think about how well this seems to be going and be thinking 'ok, what's going to go wrong...?' The other part of me is much more positive though and I'm going to try and concentrate on that... This secret had the potential to ruin everything that we've got while it was kept, but now it has the potential to draw us even closer together perhaps.
Max pulls me close and I lean into his body, relishing the feeling of being with him again. Only now, it's even better than it was last night, or ever before, because as he holds me, I know that he sees the real me. He doesn't see some facarde, or some role I play, he sees me, Liz Parker, a witch...and he still loves me...
For a moment there's silence, and then Max asks about Ainsling and I pull away, shaking my head. "Honestly Max...I don't know... I spoke to her earlier about wanting to tell you and she told me no point blank...yet then she asked for that meeting..." I trail off, still shaking my head. "I don't know what to expect...I'm sorry..." I tell him softly before leaning back and resting my head against his chest. I'm as nervous as him about this meeting...not least because now I have already told Max...I've broken one of the most basic rules... Then again, if you ask me if I regret it now, I won't have any hesitation in my answer...not one bit...
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I still want to be Max.
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*MAX*
Biting my lip, I thread my fingers through Liz's. What is this all going to mean? Liz doesn't know what Ms. Brennan wants. Somehow, I'm sure it must be related, since this is all happening. I have to remind myself that Liz has been a witch for years. This isn't something new, just new to me. I remember how Liz immediately thought that Ms. Topolsky was a spy as soon as she knew about us. Of course, it turned out that she was right ...
When everyone is out to get you, sometimes paranoia is just plain common sense.
"You talked to her about wanting to tell me?" I repeat. That part is still fluttering around my brain, refusing to sit still. It makes sense that she would need to ask. Our group also has rules about checking with the others before sharing the secret with someone new. It's all so much the same.
She nods and I feel a smile cross my face. I'm not even sure how to describe how that feels, but I know it means that she loves me. Liz really did want to tell me. Not that I doubted it, but this casual confirmation is like a gift. Ms. Brennan said no, but she still did it.
"Are you going to tell her and Serena that I know?" I ask. I don't want to get her in trouble, after all.
As Max slips his hand into mine I look up at him and smile softly. To know that he's still here, after everything I've told him is one of the most wonderful things I can imagine. I can tell that he's nervous about Ainsling though, and I can't say that I blame him. I think deep down I know that whatever she tries, it won't turn Max away from me, but there's still that tiny doubt and it's more than enough to make me worry. Even the hint that something might make me lose Max...I don't know if I could bare it...
Max looks surprised by my talking to Ainsling about it, that I actually wanted to tell him and I almost feel like laughing... Well, almost that is... There's a serious factor here, I want him to believe that I told him because I wanted to, not because I had to...
Had I chosen to, I could have continued lying to him when he asked me just now, but the fact is I didn't. I made another choice, a choice to let him know exactly what he's signing up for and there's not one bit of regret in my mind relating to this decision. Slowly and deliberately I nod to confirm this for him. I don't want to make it seem like I'm just saying this, I need him to know that I mean it...
As I finish I know that I got through because of the smile on his face. That expression is enough to tell me that he believes me and I'm so glad.
Then, Max sends me into a spin again by asking the one question I don't know how to answer. 'Am I going to tell them about him knowing...?' I know that it seems like I'm doing it a lot, but I can't help shaking my head in response to this. "Honestly Max, I don't know what I'm going to do... It's not that I don't want to tell them, but what I have just done is huge, and in telling you all this I took away a decision from them..." I look down at the ground. "I'm scared about how they're likely to respond to that..." I admit hesitantly.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
*Max*
I bite my lip, sympathizing with her distress. “I understand,” I say, rubbing her arm. “Michael and Isabel weren’t exactly supportive when they first found out I told you, either. Maybe we should wait until we know what this meeting is about.”
Ms. Brennan only mentioned me and Liz. She didn’t indicate that Serena would be there, but maybe that’s not needed. Or maybe she’s waiting to decide about me, first, before involving Liz’s sister. I only hope that if this is what the meetings about, that I can make her see that they can trust me. The thought causes me to raise an eyebrow in question. “She’s not gonna turn me into a frog or something if she doesn’t like me, is she?” I ask with a grin.
