Silent Whispers(AU M/L ADULT)Ch10 A/N 1/20/07[WIP]

[mmcherron]

A/N: All of the RED Bold Italic are Liz Thoughts
All of the GREEN Bold Italics are Maria's Thoughts
All the DARK BLUE Bold Italics are Michael's Thoughts

I would like to thank everyone that has hung in there reading this fic I know its a little different. Thank you for giving it a try even though we killed off someone. Its nice to know we have a few readers reading it and not hating us to much.

Smooches Luzser1800 my AWESOME Co-Author she ROCK!!! I could have gotten though this chapter or any other chapter for that matter without you and your patients.


Chapter 10

"Michael, you are such an asshole!" Maria screamed into his ear as soon as he entered their place and had slammed her hand into the back of his head before he had a chance to turn around, to which he gave an audible, yet not too shocked grunt.

"Maria, I just walked thirty blocks in the heat, give me a break, please." It was obvious that he was tired, but Maria couldn't afford him the minute he wanted. He sat down. "And I can't believe you actually left me there! It's like a thousand degrees outside!"

Maria ignored his pain. "Our best friend thinks we hate her, you ass! I looked in her eyes and she looked like she's just about given up. I don't know if she'll ever forgive us for this."

I know for sure if I was her I would never forgive me. I can’t believe that I did that to my best friend. We always agreed to be there for each other and the first time she asked me and needed me, I turned my back on her. What kind of friend am I? I’m so ashamed of myself.

"Well, then she obviously doesn't know me very well," Michael chuckled.

"You can't make light of this, Michael, you called her a slut! How do you think that made her feel? You told her that you were happy that she didn’t have Max’s last name. You know that means that you are happy that she didn’t get to be married to the only man she ever loved. How did you think she was going to feel…Fuck and I agreed with some of what you said so I’m just as bad!!! "

"I know!" He yelled, turning on his wife. "I'm sorry," he said, beaten. "Liz should know me by now. I open my mouth without thinking. I am an asshole. But she should know that by now," he tried to justify.

Maria sat down heavily next to him, putting her head in her hands. "What are we going to do now, Michael?" She sobbed and Michael rubbed her back in comfort. "I can't lose her, too." She shook her head and looked at her husband. "Michael, do you think..."

I should have been there for her. She is out there pregnant and all alone. What is worst of all, she forgot everything and ran out of the house. Where did she go? Will she ever talk to me again? What happens if she runs away and I never see her again and this would be the last thing she ever remembers that I said to her. I have to find her….

"What?"

"Do you think it's possible that Liz is telling the truth?"

"No," Michael shook his head and hardened his expression.

"Michael, I swear that I felt something when I was taking Liz upstairs that day...Almost like someone walked through me."

"Come on, Maria!" He cut her off in aggravation. "Will you listen to yourself? Ghosts?!"

"What about the door slamming? What about the feeling I had that someone was pushing past me?"

"There are perfectly logical explanations for all of that!" Michael stood up, not wanting to face Maria right now.

“Why don’t you want to believe that just maybe just a little deep down that it might be a possibility? Everything always has to be black and white for you. What if he was trying to tell you something that day and you are just too much of a stubborn pig to see it. He was your best friend in the whole world and you always had his back. Just think about it. At least maybe try.” She waited a beat before asking, "Michael, what's really wrong?"

"Nothing!" He turned his back on her.

She approached him from behind and put her hands on his back. "Michael, you never really had a chance to deal with Max's death and...It's okay to feel bad..."

What would you know about it? I should have been in that fire with him in that room. I should have been watching his back better but I blew it and now my best friend, no my brother, is gone. Not only that, I think I just destroyed his fiancé. What kind of friend would say those things to her?

I promised him that I would protect her and watch her if anything happened to her and the first thing I do when she needs me the most...I give it to her. I just don’t know what the hell I’m doing. I should have saved Max that day in the fire and then Liz wouldn’t have to be all alone.

Michael spun around, his eyes watering against his will. "He left me, Maria!"

"I know," she whispered, nodding sadly.

"And with everything that's happened to Liz..." He shook his head, water finally falling from his eyes.

"I know, Michael," she said compassionately.

"He'd hate me, Maria."

"No," she shook her head.

"Yes, he would," he nodded. "I promised him that I would take care of her. And I've just made a mess of everything." Maria moved over and took him in her arms. "I didn't mean what I said in that car, I swear. I just..." He couldn't go on. He buried his face in her blonde hair.

"It's okay, Michael. I'm here." She closed her eyes against his shoulder and held him tightly to her, giving him his moment to grieve for his best friend.

**********************

“What?” Xan said as soon as he seemed to come out of his haze.

I can’t believe it. He knew, no one knew about that. Only Max and I know of that nickname. That's Max's word!

“That word, what was that word you used?” Liz was sure she had heard it.

“What word? I didn’t say anything.” Xan was suddenly very defensive and got up from the couch, turning his back on her.

Max's word! Only Max would know that word. Come on stop playing like you don’t know what I’m talking about. I’m not that crazy…Even though I slept with my dead husband using another man's body I still know the differences between crazy and sane.

Liz stood and yelled, “Max?!”

He spun around with anger in his eyes. “Xan! Remember?! Try not to get us confused!”

“I think you’re the one who needs to worry about the confusion!” When he didn’t say anything, Liz began to leave. “Forget it. I have to get out of here, I can’t...I can’t deal with this right now.”

This is total bullshit! I know he is lying. There is something happening to him because there is no way that I just heard him say that. I know what I heard and I will get it out of him because there is no way in hell I will put up with this.

"I don't know why you think that Max and I are the same person!" Xan followed her to the door.

"I am a slut, aren't I?!"

I have to be because only a slut would sleep with anyone that WASN’T her husband. Right? I have this internal battle with myself everyday about it. I know that it was Max. I have that same feeling something isn’t right here and I need to think.

Xan stopped immediately, all the anger draining from his face. "What?"

Tears fell freely. She couldn't hold them in any longer. At the same time, she didn't want him to watch her cry. She angrily swiped at her face. "That's what everybody thinks. That you're a scam artist who used Max against me to get me into bed."

"Liz, I..."

"No!" She stepped back as he tried to close in on her. "They're right, aren't they? It was all a scam, wasn't it?"

Damn, you are a great lier. So tell me how you did it? Did Max tell you about everything? Did he tell you our deepest secrets? So now you thought that just maybe you can scam the dumb grieving girl. I’m so stupid to think that maybe there was a chance that maybe Max might still be around.

He was silent for only a moment, and did his best to put absolute truth in his eyes. "What does your heart tell you?"

Her bottom lip trembled. "What?" He made a single nod with his head, silently telling her to look inside herself. "Stop it!" she yelled.

Stop!!! I don’t want you to play head games with me. One minute you are yelling at me that I’m stupid and calling you the wrong name. Yes, Liz does know the difference between alive and dead. Max..Dead…Xan…Alive. Max the man I loved ever since I knew what love was and Xan just a nightmare waiting to sneak up on you and mess with the only memories that I have left.

"Stop what?"

"Making me...making me believe! That whole night was a fake, wasn't it?! You lied about being gay! Everything that happened! That wasn't Max! That was you! The whole time!"

"If that had been me," Xan started, "how could I have possibly known the things Max said to you?"

"First of all, Max could have said anything to you before he died, anything that you could have used! Secondly, how the hell do you know what Max said to me that night?!" Just as Liz was turning her back on him, now almost sure that she had been had, she heard him call to her.

"Liz! Wait!" The tone in his view was eerily familiar and Liz couldn't take another second of it.

Stop it!! I can’t listen to you right now. I’m freaking out. I swear I just heard Max. I have to leave. I know that I’m starting to lose it now.

Before she had a chance to turn around of her own free will, her wrist was grabbed and she was spinning. Before she knew anything else, hot lips devoured hers, a slick tongue probing her mouth. Only a second or so later, the mouth left hers, violently ripping itself away with an animalistic growl.

Why are you doing this to me? Why can’t you tell me what is happening? I know that kiss. I know there is something familiar about it.

While Xan had his back to her, she felt lost in the sensation of the kiss. She slowly put her fingers on her lips, knowing and not wanting to believe that she had been kissed like that before. Her furious confusion pushed the next words out of her mouth. "Who the hell are you?!"

Liz's confusion began to win out over her anger and pain as she watched Xan's eyes close tight and then open. Again and again his forehead would crease and his eyes would shut in some form of silent agony. "I don't understand..." He fell to his knees, his legs unwilling to hold him up any longer.

Liz's whole body shook with fear as she made her way closer to him ever so slowly. "Xan..." she whispered.

Another animalistic sound was pulled from his chest. Finally, he began to speak, but kept his head down, his eyes on the apartment floor. "Liz, I...there's all these...things going on inside me. I know things that I shouldn't know. And every time I look at you, I feel out of breath. Butterflies in my stomach. I can't control it." Liz took another caustious step toward him. "I keep seeing these images of you and I. No!" He stopped to correct himself. "You and Max."

What!!! There is no way that can be happening. Like what kind of images? What kind of feelings? What is that supposed to mean? What am I supposed to tell you?

Xan was really beginning to scare her, and she wasn't sure what was propelling her to keep moving closer until she eventually knelt on the floor in front of him.

When Xan spoke again, he still didn't look at her. "Everytime you are around, I want to touch you. Hold you. Kiss you." His breathing became heavier. He put his hands over his chest. "I swear to God, it feels like he's still in here." He finally tore his eyes from the floor and looked at Liz.

No you are lying I saw him leave I know Max is not here. He left me. I know he did. He went into the light. I know it….I know...

Liz reared back with a sharp gasp at what she saw. Her voice came out in a terrified whisper. "No."

TBC...