Or because she had simply wanted to go home again.
Who’s home one might ask because it was all some fantasy because it was not a home because she could not possibly remember even though she said she did, and certainly had fooled Max into believing that he could remember it all too. And sure, he might have remembered some kernels here and there of who he might have been in a different land. But the fact remained, that the boy she had loved at fifteen and even married at eighteen could have a child with such an individual gave her plenty of sleepless nights. But at the end of the day, even with that knowledge, well, she had married him anyways, and become his wife despite it all, all because a year earlier, while they were taking a break. A break mine you that she had insisted on and even pushed on a thoroughly unwilling Max all out of some misguided notions she thought as if that makes it all better. And okay, they were pretty serious at the time, and who knows what I might have prevented by doing what I did she thought. And I do know what I set in motion, she muttered as she thought of the new timeline, she had unleashed on them all and of the child that Max eventually would put up for adoption. A choice he had made on his own. But deep down she had known it was needed for the necessity of their survival. Despite what it what it said about her because then she did not have to play mother to a child that was not hers, and even that could be abridged except for who was the mother of the baby. So, it was a decision Max had made, because it had been a baby, he had with someone who had deceived them so badly.
Even though we should have seen it coming, she muttered. And later on, life would even make her wonder if she ranked up there with Tess given what she had done although my crime was out in the name of love and protection she would say in defense of her actions. Even if I could say all day long that I did it for the right reasons, she thought. But I still hurt Max and I took something so personal and profound from him.
His love and trust, and to make matters worse.
Their child.
A child that almost was able to make her forget that she had given birth to her husband’s first-born child. Because of course, there was another child out there that had the prize of being first born. But she and Max had been able to create their own child and sometimes that will forgive all.
Right?
Wrong.
Because no, Liz was never able to forget the fact Max had given Tess a child, despite knowing what she had done to engineer that fact. So, to sit and listen as the music from the 80’s and appropriately or not so, Michael Jackson’s Billie Jean was blaring through the speakers as the working DJ who had taken up for the departing band was on a break meant Liz was wondering if it was all a dream?
It even made her wonder if she had traveled back to a time where she could be told that no, Max did not have a child with Tess. But unfortunately, no, she was in her own time. And listening to of all people, Tess’s duplicate Ava telling her what she had always longed to hear twenty years before. But had not, she muttered to herself. How I wanted to hear it once upon a time she thought. So, the fact she was hearing the words meant she was not prepared for it. Because it was coming when she least expected it. And therefore, it was blowing her mind to find out that once upon a time dream was coming true, and Max did not have a child out there in this world. Okay, he does, but not the one I thought he had she would clarify for herself. As her jaw dropped open and she looked at the last person who should be telling her this life-changing news. “Seriously,” Liz was thinking and saying.
Ava knew that Liz had to be thinking and feeling bamboozled and that of course, I am the last person who should be telling her this, she thought. But of course, proper etiquette be damned because she was the one telling Liz, because no one else will. “I know what you want to say?”
No, you don’t, Liz would think but would not, as she was absolutely stunned. She could only sputter out something worthy of a reply but found that she could not come up with one, so she spoke in a simple answer that had summed up what she had already been thinking, “No, you don’t” she would mutter to herself because it could not be possibly true. Could it? “Because you, cannot be serious, can you?”
I would love to not be rocking her world, and it had simply come out and well Ava muttered to herself but found her now that it was out there in the universe, she had to continue on. “Unfortunately,” she murmured. “But I am completely serious Liz, because I guess you were not around for that discovery because what I am saying is the truth. Tess is not the biological mother of Max’s child. So, the only child he does have is with you. And that makes you, the only one who has that awesome duty.”
Liz could not really take it in that she now was the mother of Max’s only child to date because her mind simply could not compute any of it, because it was not making any sense to her. It still is not. “But I saw the child return?” she would mutter as she remembered that time that she and Max been so tentative in their reunion after that debacle in Vermont. She had truly believed that she and Max could make it, and that things were starting to turn around and head in the right direction, finally she thought. After so many false starts, she would mutter to herself. But that would end in shambles when Tess would return with said baby and it would throw everything in chaos once more. Our life story she muttered. So, for people to try to tell me that there was no other baby who shares Max’s DNA is too ludicrous because I was here, she muttered to herself. I saw Tess return with a baby. “Ava, I know, there was a child.”
“Oh, there was a child. But Max was not the father,” Ava would mutter because she was also in a state of disbelief still after all this time she thought as she thought of her duplicate, and what Tess had done. That she could come up with such a deception and think that it could win out over the long haul she thought. It could never end well she could not help but think. “But I guess she was dead, and she figured that Max would have no reason not to think the child was not his own.”
Until he did know.
Still, it did not make sense to Liz. “How can any of what you say be the true?” Liz asked. “How could any of, you be sure?” she could not help but ask because seriously, how could Ava of all people know such a thing? Clearly Liz was still in the state of denial that her dream could be something that might have happened, with me so unaware she thought. As she glanced at Ava, and was thinking, this has to be some rabbit hole she thought that I fell into she thought. “How can you know?”
“I know,” Ava smiled. “Because sure to you, I would be the last person in this world to know such a thing, but in this case when I came back to town. My twin sister left a big shadow,” she murmured and almost stopped for a minute because Liz knew they had been speaking in code. Of the role that Ava was pretending to be, because they were something so unique than twins they would think, we are the same person, just different copies, and life skills Ava would think. But because of the place they were, and you could not be sure who was listening in, right, so you had to be speaking in code, right?
Because it was too ludicrous to be true.
“There was a baby,” Liz murmured armament that her memory was not faulty. So, she did not care if she was repeating the same thing over and over. Because it had been something she had seen with her own two eyes. She knew it was not some mind warp or dream, and the baby had been real, too real she thought. I touched him for a split second, she thought. Of the time before Max had made the hand over. “So, how can you tell me Max was not his father, when I know Tess had a baby, and when we saw the child?”
“Oh, yes, you are right about that, there was a child” came a new voice into the conversation and it was one of surprise and irritation to be interrupting this conversation. Although it did not matter to Liz because it was still a situation, she was having a hard time grasping because it was too unbelievable come on, Isabel must have Ava pulling a prank on me because I hurt Max so deeply, she would think. Yeah, that is right, Isabel must be pulling something on me she thought. And I deserve it, she thought as she turned to Isabel as a life saver, because she will tell me the truth, right? That Ava is pranking me on her orders. So, she turned and faced the person she knew could pull a prank or two, but she cannot lie she thought of the woman who was totally different from her. We are two different people, she thought. But we love the same man. “Isabel,” she would mutter as she spotted the intruder into their conversation. And she was, indeed, Max’s sister.
Yes, Max’s sister. Liz would mutter. She must know the truth, she thought. But will she listen to me, or even talk to me. Liz did not know that to be honest with you. But it would not stop her from speaking her name, “Isabel,” she would repeat once more for emphasis.
“Liz,” Isabel muttered in such a way that almost brought a smile to Liz, because it did make her want to smile because it is totally Isabel to think she is better than me. And in this case, maybe she is better than me. Because after all, she would not have hurt Max like I did. Liz would think. ally Isabel to think she is better than me.[/i]
Overhearing and letting Liz into her brother’s misery was not the thing Isabel wanted to be overhearing as she came over and spotted Ava talking to Liz. Which was trouble as Isabel would often know. Because of course, it is trouble, how can it not be? When you are mixing Tess’s duplicate and the woman her brother had married and who then preceded to take his heart and stomp all over it.
So, yeah, the very last thing Isabel wanted to hear was Ava filling in her former sister-in-law on Tess’s final betrayal. And to see the disbelief on her former sister-in-law’s face. She wanted to be surprised at Liz’s reaction, and part of her was. But she also felt for the first time in a long time a kin ship with her brother’s former wife? But still, the truth of it was a time that showed how her brother had been conned and how it had fallen upon her brother one more time to absorb life’s cruelty. Because even if he had not been physically raising the child. To find out the child is not even biologically related to you stung she muttered to herself. And then having to let the memory of the child go. And to know at the same time that out there in the world was his only child he would now have, because she had been taken by her mother who had taken her and left him behind was almost too much.
Tess really did con us, Isabel would think. We should have seen it coming. But we did not because Max had not even questioned it at the time as she irritably responded to her former sister-in-law. “Yeah, there was a baby in the beginning…” as it still stung her to know what had happened and she was not really wanting to deal with Liz about it, just yet. So, she turned her attention to the other women in their ranks. “What, you actually told her?” she would accuse Ava, who only nodded.
“At least someone did,” Liz would mutter with shock and dismay. Because still she was inclined to not believe it, but I deserve to know she would think to herself as she saw the look of dismay on Isabel’s face as she was glaring at Ava, who obviously could care less. Still for Liz, to have been here in Roswell at the time and to know there had been a baby. How could it be true but is it? she murmured as she was starting to believe. Still, how could the baby be anyone other than Max’s because she knew Tess’s whole purpose was to live up to a deal that we would only learn about, in the end, when it was too late to do anything different than feel the consequences. So, Max has to be the father of that baby, right
Wrong.
Still Liz felt she needed confirmation, so she turned to Isabel once more. “Is Ava right, was Max not the father of Tess’s baby?”
Isabel was annoyed. Because what could she say. Because what could Isabel legitimately say any of this, but she had to say something and the bitch in her, and the one who had never been that close to Liz in the first place started to come out, so what am I going to say?
Huh, Isabel. What are you going to say to the woman who hurt your brother, yet had a vested interest in the knowing the truth? Still, Isabel did not feel that charitable to giving up any of the information Liz clearly needed to hear so she looked for a diversion, and she glanced over at the dance floor as everyone was having a good time and improbably Maria had lured Michael back onto the dance floor. And it was a fast song. And it seems like her friend was having a good time. Which is what Isabel wanted for her friend. Now about my brother, she would murmur as she saw her brother keenly observing everyone and everything and yet not coming their way.
Isabel sighed. Liz knew Isabel well and she knew the blond was not going to be forthcoming if given the chance. So, she decided to prod. “Isabel?”
“What?” Isabel asked with an irritating mutter as Ava could only smirk and as a result Isabel could only groan.
“And therefore, Liz knew to go in for the kill, metaphorically she “Isabel, tell me what I want to know. Can’t you see that I have a right to know. Yes, I hurt your brother and I know it,” she sighed because she knew she had to speak the truth, if she was going to get somewhere with Isabel. Because she knew her former sister-in-law had a right to hate her for what she had done, because if our positions were reversed? “But know that I wish I could have done so much differently but I am positive that on the other hand, that I did the only thing I could have, and I am sure your brother would back me up?”
Nice one Liz.
“You did not even give him a chance to tell you to go?” Isabel would only mutter. “So, why should I feel the need to enlighten you with the truth?”
“I loved your brother,” Liz said softly, a little too softly but the two women were able to hear her words. But of course, Liz also knew it was not the past tense, in which she talked about her love for Max. Because she knew she still did love him today. Because that love had not diminished at all, no matter how much I wish that it could.
“Sure, you did” Isabel would mutter.
“I did Isabel, and in many ways, I still do” Liz said with a sigh. “I am not trying to hurt your brother today, tomorrow or any day. I want things to be different. And maybe that is why I came back to Roswell so that I can make up for what I did in the past. I wish it could have been easier, but it was. But I am here today, and I want to find some way to make sure everything is the way it should be.”
“You do not regret what you did?” Isabel demanded with an equal sigh. “So, how can you make up for what you did when you do not regret what you did to my brother?”
“I can at least try,” Liz sighed as she looked across Cow Patties and saw Max looking at her, like he had so many times back in the day. Why does he make me feel like this she murmured as she felt the cascading emotions rock through her in a whisper as Ava was observing and Isabel ignoring the situation and of course Isabel now saw the glances between her brother and his former wife, and she could only sigh because she wished her brother could move on from this torture?
Why does he do this to himself, Isabel wanted to know.
Because it was obviously torture that seemed endless at this point. Why can they not quit each other? was the prevailing wisdom. And even Max and Liz would wonder that too at some point given what they had done to each other, on both sides of their relationship. We should be bigger than this, and better…
Why cannot we stop this insanity they would think together.
But love was not logical, and it did not always make sense. So, Isabel saw the searing glances her brother was sending Liz and could only sigh as even Liz could not bear it anymore. Therefore, she needed to end this. She needed a diversion from those glances that were making her like putty. “Please, Isabel, tell me, I need to know. Because it might not make things better at this point because there is so much water under the bridge, and there is so much baggage piled up on the shore. But I was here back then, and I had to deal with it. So, please tell me, was Max the father of Tess’s father?
What could Isabel say to that?
Nothing except to admit the obvious truth. And so, she finally found herself caving to the pressure. “Fine,” she would only mutter. “No, the baby we saw was not Max’s,” she sighed, and Liz felt faint and if she had not already been sitting down than she might have fainted. “I cannot believe it,” she let out in a strangled moan.
Of course, neither could Isabel. And of the three, maybe only Ava could believe it because it was her duplicate who had been the one to deceive everyone. Tess had to know it they would think. Even though she had not known Tess but certainly her duplicate’s reputation lived on after death, and it was hard to live down and so all she heard over the years seem on brand for the mischievous blonde. Because Ava came from a different crowd. While the Roswell gang had been blindsided. Ava could have imagined Lonnie or Rath doing the same thing. Because to them, nothing was off limits.
Anything was possible.
You have to do anything to survive, Ava muttered. We had a different code. So, why did Tess end up in Roswell and Ava in New York was something no one knew except to say there was probably a rebel in every family. Someone who loved to be the outlier.
And often was the outlier.
At the same time, Isabel knew there were caveats to her admission, and she was not so fast to share them even though she knew she should not have given the impression she had to her former sister-in-law. As a spectator to the conversation, even Ava knew the very caveats and could only shake her head at Isabel cavalier approach to filling Liz in. While at the same time, Liz felt like she was on another planet. Because almost instantly, both her head and stomach stormed, and she was gasping for some fresh air. As her head was spinning. Because so much was now different, wasn’t it? She felt like she was going to throw up. And she was not even drunk because she had been barely drinking of anything with substance or quantity in a good while, but she felt dizzy and therefore, before Isabel was able to finish what she was going to say….
Liz bolted.
So, it was too late. And it only left Ava and Isabel looking at each other and the now red head glared at the blonde. “You did not tell her everything,” came Ava at Isabel.
She bolted before I could she said in her defense, as she could only sigh because she knew she had neglected to tell Liz everything. So, she knew she had left her former sister-in-law with a different impression than what was reality. While at the exact same time. Across the club, Max saw his sister saying something to his former wife. Which seemed to make Liz sick to her stomach, and as a result she had run off. Shaking his head, “Geez thanks Isabel,” he would mutter and instead of dealing with his sister and seeing what she might have said. Max raced after his former wife to give her support, even though it made very little sense to do so because of their tremendous baggage. Why am I doing this? he was asking himself as he ran after his ex-wife. It’s ex for a reason Max, why are you doing this to yourself. Should you not have already learned your lesson after the motel he muttered.
Nope, as he called out, “Liz…”
While in the club, Isabel and even Michael and Maria, who were still on the dance floor and thankfully oblivious to the escalating drama, could only watch it all transpire.
As if Maria knew what her husband might do. She stepped in and stopped her Space boy from making a scene. She took his arm tenderly. “Leave it alone Space boy,” she said with an edge to her warning. “Max can deal with it himself,” she warned. Although Michael doubted it, but she did not do anything about it, instead choosing his wife, and staying where he was.
Thankfully, as Maria only dragged him on the dance floor as a song was staring…
*
Max was a person who had numerous times over his unique courtship with his wife had found Liz running when the heat got too hot. So, he thought nothing, and it was almost instinct now to rush after the woman who had held his heart, despite that knowledge and the fact that he constantly had to deal himself the ability to withstand the pain that came from the only woman he could love and especially since that last time had almost done him. Which told him that I should be bigger this this he thought. She does this to me all the damn time he would think as he rushed out in the night’s air. Despite not talking to his former wife all night. So, he could have ignored it all, and let her walk away, which is her tradition he would mutter. After all, she’s so good at it he thought. But he knew it was something that his sister had said to her that got her running and therefore, he felt bad and needed to follow.
“Liz,” he called even though he was telling himself to go back inside. Max, you should leave her alone, he wanted to tell himself as he pursued the woman who had always felt it easy to walk away from.
After all, it had started when he was barely sixteen and when it had gotten too much for her, admittedly he would agree that it was probably warranted at the time, even though selfishly he had wanted her to stay and fight for him and show that the commanders of another planet did not make their decisions for them on this planet, and in this world. Really, Max would ask himself. I am supposed to be a different person on this planet, he would ask himself. Even if the mere thought of other planets, and other versions is slightly crazy. Only slighty he would ask himself. It was not only slight, but it’s damn bizarre but he knew it was no sci-fi drama but his real life.
Therefore, it was all too real.
And because of one very human young woman who is human, despite those pesky changes he thought but because of that young woman who had age fifteen had allowed him to achieve a dream and let him love her, and it had given him a chance to be a whole human in so many ways. And because all of his dreams had resolved about one girl who was now in this night’s air, which was getting colder by the minute but looking just as beautiful as she had at fifteen. But now brought a whole different essence too as an adult woman, as she had a gorgeous sense to her, and she looked lost and was looking out in the darkness, with no fixed target in mind, yet seemed so far away despite being so close to him now, finally, he thought after years of not knowing where she was except to know it was not anywhere close to me, he thought. “Liz,” he would now whisper as he stood captivated still after all this time.
Something that had begun in third grade when he had gotten a chance to look at her.
On that playground…
Liz did not want Max to have followed her out into the night sky. Because the last thing she wanted was to deal with as she battled all she now knew, even if she sensed that she did not know the whole store, what else would be new, she thought. She would mutter to herself, but she did not have any way to say it because she felt queasy because of so much that could have been different if only she had known everything, but she also knew it probably would not have changed anything because in the end,I married and I still found a way to walk away from him, and it had nothing to do with the baby. Although so much could have been different if only certain things had been slightly skewed differently. The baby is not why I hurt Max so deeply and took OUR baby girl, she would think. As she faced, the man she walked away from, and had no idea why he still drew her in.
“Max, please go back because I am fine,” she would only say. When she could have said so much more.
“If my sister said anything to you than I am sorry?” Max murmured. Because he knew his sister was wonderful and mother, but she could be a lot to deal with on a good say. Sometimes I don’t even want to deal with her, and that went for anyone in this world. We love her, but she can be insensitive even if when she is trying to be helpful, but he also did not know what his sister may have said.
“Isabel was not the issue,” Liz would mutter. “I know how to deal with your sister,” she sighed. “Isabel was only letting me know something I should have known a long time ago, and even if it might not have made a difference.”
“What are you talking about?” Max asked, because this time, he did not know what his sister might have told his former wife.
“I know, Max” Liz would mutter.
“You know, what?” Max asked. Obviously, still in the dark. What does she think she knows? he would mutter to himself.
“I know about the baby, Max” Liz sighed.
“God,” Max as he wanted to ask, what baby? but he instantly of what baby his former wife was speaking of as he bristled at the flashes that flooded himself as it brought back the deep deep regret because he had been such a fool. Why did I not know, why could I not question it. But still, he did not know what his former wife might know. So, all he came up with was “Oh,” he would think, and Liz could only incredulously look at her one-time husband.
“Oh, is that all you can say?”
“What else can I say,” Max would think. “It is a sentiment that captures so much,” he would find a way to mutter. “I don’t know what my sister might have told you?”
Liz could only shake her head because he did not even know she would mutter and guess. “You do not know…”
“I think we have established how little I do know,” Max sighed. And that is right on target he would think. There has been so much I have not known “That time was hard for me, obviously,” he would think. I don’t like to remember that time. “What do you think you know?”
“Max, Tess’s baby was not yours,” Liz would mutter as she watched as Max flinched by her words, as if he had not been expecting this to be what Isabel had told her and now that she had brought up into the open, she could not help but need answers from the source. “Was your sister telling me the truth, and the baby was not yours?”
