Somewhere, Anywhere (M&M, CC/UC, AU, Adult) COMPLETE, 07/23/17

[sarammlover]

OH MY GAWWWWWWWWWWD!

I feel like it is the only thing I can say right now. MICHAEL....Im stunned. Absolutely stunned. He just proposed to Sarah with Maria's ring. Sarah is going to be DEVASTATED if she ever finds out and the second Maria sees it, she will know its Maria's ring Holy F WORD!

[April]

Carolyn:

OMG......what else could happen??

Oh, a lot.

Sarah was proposed to.........or was she really? Michael couldn't have been more unsure of that action.

But he still did it. He stilled proposed. And she still said yes.

And to top it off, Sean knows Liz wants only Max.

Liz is kind of more of a subtle mess than the rest of them, but she's still a mess, too.


Sara:

OH MY GAWWWWWWWWWWD!

Pretty much the reaction I was hoping for.

MICHAEL....Im stunned. Absolutely stunned. He just proposed to Sarah with Maria's ring. Sarah is going to be DEVASTATED if she ever finds out and the second Maria sees it, she will know its Maria's ring Holy F WORD!

This is a game-changer, for sure. I mean, not only did he propose, but he reused that ring, that ring that is a symbol of his and Maria's love for each other and . . . oh, man, it's bad. Michael just fucked things up as much as he possibly could.


Thanks for reading and leaving feedback! Let us continue!








Part 52








Sarah could barely wait to tell Tess about the engagement. All morning long, she’d been bursting with excitement. Last night, she would have called her and told her, or sent her a picture of the beautiful ring, but she and Michael had been . . . busy. All-night lovemaking session. She couldn’t complain.

“Hey, best friend!” Sarah chirped as Tess opened the door.

“Hey,” Tess greeted, sounding decidedly less chipper. She was wearing a big t-shirt that looked like one of Kyle’s, and sweatpants. Tess never wore sweatpants, but her regular pants were probably too tight at this point. “What’re you doing here?” she asked groggily.

“Oh, you know . . .” Sarah twirled her hair around her left index finger, hoping that Tess would notice the ring just two fingers down. It wasn’t as big as the one she’d gotten from Kyle, but Sarah thought it was just perfect. “Just thought I’d stop by and maybe see if you wanna do something today.”

“Like what?” Tess asked.

Sarah shrugged. “I don’t know. We could go out to eat, or we could go shopping.” She used some emphatic hand gestures, still hoping the ring would catch her friend’s attention.

“Ugh, the only store I can shop at right now is the maternity store,” Tess groaned, “so I don’t think that’s such a good idea.”

“Well, we don’t have to go anywhere.” Sarah raked her hand through her hair, shocked by Tess’s obliviousness. “We could just, you know, hang out and talk. About stuff.”

“Like about how bad my back hurts,” Tess complained. “Or how swollen my feet are.”

“Tess.”

“What? They are. They look like two huge beach balls.”

“Tess, are you blind or something?”

Tess scrunched up her face in confusion. “What?”

Sarah finally just held up her hand, making it obvious.

Tess’s mouth dropped open, and her eyes grew big as saucers. “Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god!” she exclaimed, bouncing up and down as well as she could. “Sarah! Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Hello, I was so obvious!”

“Oh. My. God!” Tess squealed with excitement and grabbed Sarah’s hand. “Let me see! Let me see!”

Sarah beamed as she showed off her ring. Wearing it was making her feel like the luckiest woman on earth.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Kyle wasn’t sure what was going on, but whatever it was sounded extremely high-pitched. He came out of the bathroom and Tess standing in the doorway with Sarah. They were blabbering about something, something he was about to dismiss as some girly thing he wouldn’t understand. But as he turned to head back down the hall into the bedroom, something on Sarah’s finger caught his eye.

Holy shit. That was definitely a ring. That was definitely an engagement ring.

So Michael had gone and done it. He had to admit . . . he was surprised. Sure, things had seemed to be headed in that direction for quite some time now, but . . . it just seemed sort of out of the blue.

Sarah looked happy, though, that was for sure. And even though Kyle felt happy for her, he also felt like he needed to talk to his best friend.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael strained as he raised the bench press bar from chest level back into the air. The first couple reps of this hadn’t been so bad, but now that he was doing his third set of fifty, he was really feeling it.

He paid little attention as the door to the gym opened, because all he wanted right now was to be left alone. But when he heard Kyle’s familiar voice pipe up with a cautionary, “You shouldn’t do that without a spotter,” he knew alone time wouldn’t happen.

“I’m alright,” he insisted, bringing the bar back down one more time. It took all his strength to push it back up.

“Seriously, it’s dangerous,” Kyle kept on.

Michael placed the bar back on the rack and groaned as he sat up. “Made it through.” His arms felt like they were about to fall off, though. He’d probably been pushing himself too hard.

“You look tired,” Kyle remarked.

“This is tiring stuff.” He grabbed his water bottle off the ground and took a much-needed drink. “Are you gonna work out?” he asked.

“Nah,” Kyle replied, “I was lookin’ for you. Sarah said you’d probably be here.”

He put his bottle back down again, mumbling, “Here I am.” It hadn’t been his intention to spend all morning working out. Hell, barely anyone else was even there today. He just figured it’d be a nice place to clear his head.

“She stopped by this morning,” Kyle told him.

Michael nodded, making the obvious deduction about why Kyle was there then. “So you heard?”

“Yeah.” Kyle smiled. “Congratulations.”

I don’t deserve a congratulations, Michael thought. I don’t deserve anything. “Thanks.”

Kyle sauntered towards the bench press, gripping the bar with both hands as though he longed to be able to pick it up and do some of those torturous reps Michael had just pushed himself through. “I gotta admit, though,” he said, “I thought I’d hear about it from you first.”

Michael got to his feet, shrugging. “I was gonna tell you later today.”

“Hmm.” Kyle nodded. “It’s big news.”

“Yep.” He could only imagine how excited Sarah had been to tell Tess.

“I didn’t even know you were gonna pop the question,” Kyle said.

Neither did I, he thought remorsefully. “Yeah, it was kind of a spontaneous thing.”

“Yeah? So what made you do it?”

That . . . was a question he didn’t want to answer, so he purposefully left it vague. “I don’t know, I just . . . I just did it.” Maybe it wasn’t really that big of a deal. Everyone had assumed that he’d propose to Sarah at some point. It seemed logical.

“So you’re engaged now,” Kyle said. “That’s awesome.”

“Yeah.” It really should have been, but he felt like an ass.

“I’m really happy for you, man,” Kyle went on. “Sarah’s a great girl. You’re lucky to have her.”

“I know.” Sarah was practically perfect in every way imaginable. How a loser like him had ever found an angel like her was beyond belief. But . . .

Kyle eyed him strangely.

“What?” Michael asked.

“Nothing. You just . . . you don’t seem quite as excited about it as she was,” Kyle noted.

“Well, she’s a girl,” Michael pointed out.

“Yeah, but . . . I was grinning from ear to ear when I got engaged to Tess. I couldn’t shut up about it.”

Michael flapped his arms against his sides, trying to play it off as nothing. “I’m not you, Kyle.”

“Yeah, but are you . . . are you at least happy about it?”

He didn’t know what he was, but whatever he was feeling . . . happy didn’t really seem like the right word for it. “Yeah, of course I’m happy,” he lied. “What do you want me to do, go shout it from the rooftops?”

Kyle grinned. “Maybe, if you want to.”

He didn’t want to. He didn’t even want to have this conversation. “I’m happy,” he said. “I love the girl. I can’t wait to marry her. It’s gonna be great.” He smiled, but when he turned his back to Kyle and sat down at the triceps machine, he let that smile fall away.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael felt completely physically spent by the time he got home late that afternoon. Even though he’d left the gym at lunch, he’d ended up going for a run around town instead. So now, in addition to aching limbs, he had burning lungs.

Sarah was lying on her stomach on the bed when he walked in, her feet up by the pillows. She had her phone in front of her, but she pushed it aside when she saw him and smiled at him, a huge, beaming, happy smile.

“Hey, babe,” he said, throwing off his jacket.

“Hey. I’m glad you’re home,” she said, rolling over onto her side. “I was lonely today.”

“Sorry.” He kicked off his shoes and made up a little white lie about where he’d been. “I got called in to work. It ran late.”

“I should’ve come and visited you then.”

He made his way towards the bed and lay down beside her. “Why didn’t you?”

“I was on the phone with my mom. We talked for two hours.”

“Ah.” He pillowed his head with his arms and asked, “You tell her?”

“Yeah.”

“And was she cool with it?”

“She cried a lot. Happy tears.”

“Oh. Good.” Most mothers cried horrified, fearful tears when they thought of him.

“She said she’s really happy for us and really excited. My dad will be, too.”

“When are you gonna tell him?”

“Well, he’s at a work conference this weekend, so it’ll have to wait until Monday. But it’s gonna be so great. He’s gonna love having you as a son-in-law. And Victor . . . oh, Victor is gonna love it. He idolizes you.”

“Hmm.” He smiled sleepily. “Tina really likes you, too, so she’ll be glad about it.”

“You haven’t told her yet?” She sounded surprised.

“No.”

“What about your mom?”

“Not yet.” The truth was, he hadn’t told them yet, because he didn’t want to tell anyone. Not them, not his friends . . . definitely not Maria.

“Oh my god, we should tell your mom together!” she exclaimed suddenly. “Do you want to?”

“What, like right now?” He was so tired. And this was so not something he wanted to do.

“Yeah! Let’s call her.”

Apparently he didn’t really have a choice, though. She was already reaching for her phone.

She put it on speaker, set it down on the bed right in between them, and after a few rings, his mom answered. “Hello?”

“Hey, Krista!” Sarah squealed.

“Well, hey there. How’s it going?”

“Oh, it’s going pretty well.” Sarah scratched her cheek with her left hand, and Michael fixated for a moment on that ring. That ring on her finger. Shit.

“Say hi to Michael,” Sarah said.

“Hi, Mom,” he said, sitting up straighter.

“Oh, hi, honey. Am I on the megaphone?”

“Speakerphone, Mom,” he corrected.

“Oh, you know what I mean.” She laughed a little.

“We wanted to talk to you together,” Sarah said. “We have something exciting to tell you.”

“Oh my,” his mother immediately gasped. She was probably automatically assuming pregnancy.

“Are you ready?” Sarah asked her.

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

“Okay, on the count of three.” She looked at Michael expectantly and counted down, “One, two, three! We’re . . .” When he didn’t say anything with her, she yelped, “Michael!”

“What?”

“You didn’t say it.”

“What’re we saying?” He wasn’t a mind-reader.

She mouthed ‘We’re getting married,’ and he nodded in understanding. Simple enough.

“One, two . . .” she counted down again, drawing it out dramatically this time. “Three!”

“We’re getting married,” they said in unison, though he felt like he couldn’t quite match the energy level she had.

All he heard on the other end of the call was a loud, high-pitched sound that dragged out for a few seconds. He could imagine his mom falling down on the couch, maybe fanning herself off, taking it all in. “Mom?” he said. “Are you laughing or crying?”

A distinct laugh came over the phone. “Both,” she said.

“You okay?”

“Oh, god yes. I’m so happy,” she replied. “I’m so happy for the two of you.”

“Thank you, Krista,” Sarah said. “That means everything.” She smiled at Michael and reached over to squeeze his hand. “We’re happy, too.”

Or at least we should be, Michael thought. He managed a weak smile in return, but his happiness was tainted. With doubt. And regret.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Wonder what’s on TV tonight, Alex thought as he strode down the hallway with trash in hand. Probably nothing good. It was Saturday night, and just like last Saturday night, his only companion would be his remote control. Most guys his age were going out, living it up, but that had just never been his style. Still, though . . . he felt lonely. As much as he hated to admit it, he actually missed Leanna.

He opened the trash chute and dropped his bag into it, and as he was shutting it, he heard a few people coming up the stairs. He recognized the voices, or at least one of them, so he just stood there and waited.

Isabel’s boyfriend didn’t pause as he headed up to the next floor, but Isabel, trailing behind him, did. She spotted Alex and smiled softly. “Hey.”

What was she doing here? Did he even want to know? “Hey,” he returned, surveying her outfit. Long black coat with probably not a whole lot underneath. She must have been booked by some guy here tonight.

“Isabel, come on!” Jesse called down the stairs.

Reluctantly, she headed up.

Dammit, he thought, shaking his head in disappointment. He hated that this was her life nowadays, and he hated that he was powerless to stop it.

Making his way back down the hallway, he contemplated what he was going to eat tonight. Something microwavable, probably, because he didn’t have much else on hand. He’d just gotten back inside his apartment and started rummaging through the freezer when there was a knock on his door.

Isabel? he thought hopefully. Maybe she’d had second thoughts about whatever she was doing tonight.

He shut the freezer and flew to the door, opening it eagerly. It was actually kind of a letdown to see Liz standing there instead, just because she definitely didn’t need his help.

“Hey, Liz,” he greeted.

“Hi.” She smiled, looking unsure of herself. “Sorry for just stopping by. It’s just that . . . we haven’t really talked or hung out since . . .”

“Yeah.” Since she’d asked him out on a date. “You know, I’ve just been really busy.”

She tilted her head to the side knowingly. “Really?”

“Yeah, I’ve . . .” What was the use? She wasn’t an idiot. “Okay, not really.” Truth was, he’d just been avoiding her because he didn’t know what to do or what to say in light of her little . . . invitation. Even now, he felt weird about it.

“Can I come in?” she asked.

“Sure.” He felt rude for making her stand out there so long anyway. Stepping aside, he allowed her in, hoping his place didn’t reek. He’d cleaned, but probably not well. Leanna used to take care of the housework. “So where’s Scarlet?” he inquired.

Liz took off her coat and draped it over the back of the couch, replying, “She’s staying with Max tonight.” Then she stood there for a few seconds, flapped her arms against her sides, and said, “So . . .” leadingly.

So . . . he thought. This was going well.

Finally, she rolled her eyes and broke the silence. “Okay, look, Alex, I don’t want things to be weird.”

“They’re not,” he lied.

“Yes, they are. We’ve been avoiding each other, and I feel like it’s my fault.”

“I just . . .” He didn’t want her to feel bad for putting herself forward. That wasn’t his intention. “I was just a little surprised when you asked me out on a date. I mean, that’s a little different than asking me to tag along for Christmas. I was . . . taken aback.” There, that was the right way to phrase it.

“Yeah. I get that,” she said. “I know it came out of nowhere. We can just forget it ever happened, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, sure.” Something like this would never affect or alter how much he cared about her and Scarlet.

She breathed an audible sigh of relief. “Good.”

Yeah, he thought. Good. But there was still something nagging at him, and it started to nag a lot harder when he heard music start to play in the apartment above his, followed by the distinct sound of men hooting and hollering, as if they were being thoroughly entertained. “Or . . .”

She gave him a questioning look. “Or what, Alex?”

“Well . . . maybe you had a point.” He could sit here night after night all alone, missing Leanna, wondering what Isabel was up to, or he could actually move his life forward, take a chance. “We do know each other so well,” he acknowledged. “We care about each other. We used to date.” He shrugged, trying to act as casual as possible. “Maybe it wouldn’t be such a stretch to do that again.”

She grunted in disbelief. “Wait a minute. Are you saying you want to go out on a date with me?”

“Yeah.” He felt like, at this point, they both owed it to themselves to see if anything romantic was there. Worst case scenario, they realized they were better off as friends and just went back to being that. “What do you say?”

Even though she’d originally been the one to ask him, suddenly she looked like she didn’t know what to say.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria yawned. Sunday. It was supposed to be a day of rest and relaxation, but today was jam-packed for her. She’d spent all morning cleaning the house, and her afternoon was blocked off for work. The evening would go all too fast, of course, just like Sunday evenings always did.

She sat at the front desk of Vidorra, trying to keep herself awake when she got a text from Liz. Did you see Sarah’s Instagram? it read.

Maria quickly texted back No and sent the message. Then, curiously, she sent another text. Why?

“Maria.”

She quickly put her phone away, as if she were a little kid in school who had gotten caught with it out. The guy she was working with today, Spencer or whatever, was a real pain in the ass. He treated this job like it was life or death instead of making it fun like Michael did.

“Did you give out the clubs?” he asked her.

“The golf clubs?”

“Yeah, for the putting green.”

“Uh-huh.” It was nice out today, so the residents were definitely taking advantage of being able to be outdoors. The had a lot of athletic equipment that they could loan out to them.

“Did you document it?” Spencer asked her.

“Oh. Um . . .” She bit her bottom lip nervously, knowing she’d messed up. “It was that guy. That blonde guy. You know the one. Looks like a Ken doll.”

“I don’t know that guy. That doesn’t tell me anything,” Spencer growled angrily. “When did you give them out?”

She checked the time on her phone, vaguely responding, “A while ago.”

“Great. That’s just great,” Spencer mumbled sarcastically.

“Well, he’ll bring ‘em back, though, right?”

“I don’t know, Maria. You just gave him two-hundred dollars in golf clubs.”

“For a putting green?” She found that hard to believe.

“They were brand new. Would you bring those back?”

“Yes.” But that didn’t mean everyone else would.

“This is serious, you know,” Spencer warned. “If he doesn’t bring ‘em back, it’ll come out of your paycheck. And I’m not gonna take any of the blame for this.”

Her stomach started to twist up nervously. Her phone buzzed with another message from Liz, but she ignored it. “So what do I do?” she asked, determined to make this right.

“Go ask Brody.”

“But what if he fires me?” She’d been fired before. Really didn’t want to do that again. “I’ll go ask someone else,” she decided, getting out of her chair. Michael would know what to do.

The elevator was taking too long, so she took the stairs up to the third floor and walked down the long hallway. Before knocking on the door to his apartment, she took a moment to straighten out her hair and her clothing. But that was just stupid because . . . it didn’t matter what she looked like.

She knocked, hoping he was there. Actually, she was hoping that he’d come downstairs with a solution in mind and tell Spencer to stop being such a know-it-all ass. His attitude wasn’t helping anything.

It was Sarah who opened the door, though, instead of Michael. She smiled at Maria and exclaimed, “Hey!”

“Oh, hey, Sarah.” Now this just felt weird. She didn’t want Michael’s girlfriend thinking it was normal for her to just drop by like this.

“How’s it going?” Sarah asked.

“Fine. I just . . . I had a work question,” she explained. “For Michael.”

“Oh, he’s in the shower,” Sarah informed her. “He’ll be out soon.”

Immediately, she started to picture Michael in the shower, and that was not helpful. “I can just handle it myself then,” she said.

“No, it’s fine. Come on in,” Sarah insisted, stepping aside.

Oh god, Maria thought, hesitantly stepping inside. Why the shower? Michael had always looked sexiest to her with water all over his skin. His shoulders. His abs. Good lord. She couldn’t think about that. But it was hard not to when she could hear the water running from the bathroom.

Sarah made her way back over to the couch and muted the TV. She seemed embarrassed to be watching Project Runway. “Guilty pleasure,” she said.

“We all have those.” Maria shut the door as Shango pranced up to her, pawing at her feet to get attention. “Hey, Shango,” she said, bending down to pet him. He sniffed at her hands, then nuzzled his head against her legs.

“He really likes you,” Sarah remarked.

“I must be nurturing or something,” Maria figured.

“Yeah, they can sense that.”

Maria bent down, content to occupy herself with petting the dog while she waited for Michael. She never would have pictured Michael owning a Corgi, but now that he did, it just seemed right. A bigger, tougher dog just wasn’t for him. Deep down inside, Michael was a softie. Shango was the perfect match for him.

She hadn’t even noticed that the water had stopped running when all of a sudden Michael came out of the bathroom with only a white towel tied loosely around his waist. “Oh. Shit,” he said when he noticed her, and immediately he ducked back inside.

“I probably should’ve warned him,” Sarah said before calling out, “Babe, do you need clothes?”

“I got it,” he called back. Seconds later, he re-emerged, and this time he was wearing loose grey sweatpants and a navy blue t-shirt. His towel was around his shoulders now, his hands holding on to either side of it. “Maria,” he said, approaching. “What’re you—what’re you doin’ here?”

“I just, uh . . .” That t-shirt really showed off every muscle. It was hard not to stare. “I just had a question, but I should’ve just called you. Sorry.” What had she been thinking just showing up like this? They could have been in the middle of . . . something.

“Actually . . .” Sarah looked up at Michael, then back at Maria, smiling. “I think it’s pretty great that you stopped by, because Michael and I . . .” She took a deep breath. “. . . have some news.”

Her stomach clenched, and she echoed, “News?” fearfully, automatically assuming pregnancy. No, her mind begged. No.

Michael leaned back against the counter, looking almost as fearful as Maria felt. And he didn’t say anything or even smile while Sarah grinned from ear to ear and held up her left hand. “We’re engaged!”

Maria felt like everything inside her just . . . dropped. Hard. Her eyebrows shot up, and she sharply inhaled in what felt like horror, but she tried to disguise it as surprise instead. “Wow,” she said, unable to mistake that ring. It was . . . well, it wasn’t just any ring, that was for sure. “Engaged. That’s . . .” Not fair, she thought, fighting to keep the tears out of her eyes. That was supposed to have been her ring. He’d put it on her finger, not Sarah’s. “That is news.” She managed a shaky smile, but it felt like the kind that could shatter in seconds.

“He asked Friday night,” Sarah revealed. “Totally surprised me.” She looked down at the ring adoringly, and Maria knew she had no clue that she was the second girl to receive it.

“Wow.” Maria wished she could say something else, do more to cover up her shock and grief in that moment, but that was the only word she could manage. She looked at Michael with wide eyes, sure that the devastation was written all over her face. “Wow.”

His eyes locked with hers, and she saw the silent shame there. How Sarah didn’t see it was a mystery. Maybe she was just too blinded by the beauty of that ring, or at least the thrill of wearing it.

Oh my god, Maria thought, mortified. Her insides felt like they were quaking. Oh my god. How could this be happening? How could Michael be engaged to someone else?

This couldn’t be happening.

But it was, and Sarah was clearly ecstatic about it.

“Congratulations,” Maria told her quickly, tearing her eyes away from Michael’s the second Sarah glanced up from that ring. She put on a brave front and tried to smile again, but it literally hurt.

“Thank you, Maria,” Sarah said. “That really means a lot. I’m so glad we’ve gotten to know each other this year.”

It came as no surprise to Maria that Sarah hugged her, because that was what Sarah did. She hugged her and invited her to everything and wore her engagement ring. Maria hugged her back halfheartedly and made no attempt to conceal her agony as she looked at Michael over his girlfriend’s—no, fiancee’s—shoulder. She felt . . . blindsided, and she couldn’t remember the last time something had hurt this bad. He looked like the whole thing was eating away at him, too, but he didn’t apologize. He couldn’t.

Sarah, however, did. “I’m sorry,” she said, taking a few steps back, “I’m just bursting with excitement. It’s like I have to tell everyone I’ve ever met, and then I have to tell ‘em all again.”

“Yeah, it’s . . .” Maria swallowed hard. “It’s a really big deal.” She tried to keep that smile in place, though she knew it wouldn’t stay for much longer. And the tears, once they started spilling over . . . they probably wouldn’t stop.

She made the mistake of looking down at Sarah’s left ring finger and catching sight of that diamond again, and it almost killed her. “Um, I really need to go now,” she blurted.

“Are you sure? I was just gonna cook up some lunch,” Sarah said.

Of course you were, Maria thought unhappily. “Yeah, I have to go,” she repeated.

Finally, at long last, Michael spoke up. “What was your question?” he asked her.

She honestly didn’t even remember now, or care. “Actually, it really wasn’t even a big deal,” she said, “and I think I’ve got it all figured out now.” She stared at him for a few seconds, hoping he could sense that she wasn’t just sad, but she was angry, too.

Oh god, she thought, feeling like she couldn’t breathe. I have to get out of here.

“Bye,” she said, quickly reaching for the door.

“Bye,” Sarah said as she slipped out.

She shut the door gratefully, hoping that the hallway would help. But it didn’t. It felt just as suffocating out there as it had inside. In fact, it felt even worse, because she didn’t have to hold it together anymore. She could let the tears fall, and fall they did. She held one hand to her stomach and clasped the other over her mouth to try to stifle her sobs, and at first, she was able to cry silently; but as she started to walk down the hallway, she couldn’t hold the sounds of her distress in. She sobbed. And then she had to run, because it hurt so much, she thought she might scream.








TBC . . .

-April

[keepsmiling7]

AWKWARD!!
This whole situation........and Sarah couldn't wait to tell Tess....
Michael has just made the biggest mistake of his life and of course he already regrets it.
All of this time Maria is imagining what Michael looks like in the shower......
WHAT A MESS.......
How is this ever turn out?
Don't know what to think about Liz and Alex.......going on a date. Maybe time will tell.
Thanks,
Carolyn

[sarammlover]

OMG. I think I would have thrown up!!!! MICHAEL YOU IDIOT!!! AHHH!
April...that is all I can think this week....ha ha ha. Great job!

[April]

Carolyn:

Michael has just made the biggest mistake of his life and of course he already regrets it.

Of course. He knows his heart isn't into it 100%. It's like he's said . . . he loves Sarah, but Maria is the love of his life.

WHAT A MESS.......

Oh, you can say that again.

Don't know what to think about Liz and Alex.......going on a date. Maybe time will tell.

Maybe.


Sara:

OMG. I think I would have thrown up!!!!

Me, too. I can't even imagine how it would feel to not only find out the guy you love is marrying someone else, but that he gave your ring to her, too.

MICHAEL YOU IDIOT!!! AHHH!

That deserves all caps.


Thanks for reading and leaving feedback!








Part 53








The shower. Every girl’s favorite place to cry.

Maria kept to herself for much of the night, which was easy enough to do, because Max and Dylan were slaves to the Xbox again. She tried not to say much, because she was worried that if she said anything, they’d sense how upset she was. Or at least Max would. Dylan was too little to sense that kind of thing.

By the time she was able to get in the shower and let it all out, she felt . . . even worse than she had earlier, if that was possible. Now that she’d had some time to think about it, it was really sinking in. Michael was going to marry Sarah. He would be her husband, and she would be his wife. They would start a family together someday, and their kids would be smart and beautiful.

Just thinking about it made her cry even harder. Even though she’d known this was coming, she hadn’t expected it to be so soon, and she hadn’t expected it to hurt so much. Maybe it wouldn’t have, if he’d just used a different ring. Why couldn’t he have at least done that?

As pathetic as it was, she couldn’t remember the last time she’d cried this hard. Maybe her first night away from Roswell, when all she’d been able to do was lie awake in bed, picturing how devastated Michael had looked when she’d driven away from him.

Now she wondered if that was how devastated she had looked today.

“Oh god,” she cried, pressing both hands against the shower wall as the water poured down on her. This wasn’t right. She knew this shouldn’t have felt so excruciating. She should have been able to put aside her annoyance that he’d used the same ring and managed to be happy for him. Because this was what she’d wanted, right? This was why she’d broken up with him, so he could go out there in the world and find a relationship like this with a girl who wouldn’t be a burden.

But it hurt so much. And she couldn’t stop crying, even though she wanted to.

The tears kept falling, but she managed to silence herself when she heard the bathroom door open. “Maria?” Max said.

Oh god, she thought, panicked. No, she couldn’t even look at him right now.

“Room for me in there?” he asked, probably already taking off his clothes.

“Um . . . actually, I’m just finishing up,” she said, her voice wavering. “And then I’m gonna go straight to bed.”

After a moment’s pause, he said, “Oh,” and then, “Okay.” He sounded disappointed, but he’d probably tell her he wasn’t. “I’ll just wait my turn then.”

She winced, regretting that she couldn’t just be honest with him about what she feeling right now. And why she was feeling it. “Sorry,” she apologized.

“No, it’s fine.” He opened the door and left the bathroom, shutting it firmly behind him.

Maria’s body jerked forward as another sob tore through her, as tears mixed with water on her cheeks. All this sadness inside was something she had to get out now, because when she stepped out of that shower, she had to bury it again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tess was singing when Michael stopped by the next day, and it was awful. He could hear how off-key she was even before he walked in the door.

“Baby, baby, baby, ooh!” she sang. “Like baby, baby, baby, nooo!” She was using a spatula as a microphone, dancing around and performing for no one while she washed the dishes.

“Really Tess?” he interrupted. “Bieber?”

She set the spatula back down in the water and held one hand to her stomach. “I’m singing to the twins.”

Twins. That was still unreal to him. “Yeah, I’m sure they love that.”

“It soothes them,” she insisted.

“Are you sure?”

She picked up a wet washcloth and flicked it at him. “Shut up, Michael.”

He chuckled.

Kyle came out of the bedroom a moment later, looking like his vintage self. Work-out clothes and a Patriots hat.

“Hey,” Michael said, “ready to go?”

“Yep. Are we walking?” Kyle asked.

“I can drive.”

Kyle shrugged. “I’d rather walk.”

Good, Michael thought. Kyle had done enough walking these past few months that it was pretty much back to normal for him now. Once in a while, his back spasmed and he had to sit down, but other than that . . . normal. Next came running, but that was going to be more of a gradual process.

“Alright, let’s go,” Michael said.

“Bye, honey.” Kyle stopped and gave Tess a kiss on the cheek first.

“Bye.” She smiled, and Michael thought she looked . . . genuinely happy. It was nice to see.

He was just about to follow Kyle out when Tess called him back. “Hey, Michael, wait.”

He took a few steps backward, veering into the kitchen. “Yes?”

“So . . .” She dried her hands off on a dishtowel and asked, “How’s it feel to be engaged?”

Oh, no, he thought. He didn’t want to talk about this. “Feels good,” he replied.

“Good. Just don’t be engaged for as long as Kyle and I have been. You guys should get married sooner rather than later. Like maybe this summer.”

“Well . . .” That just seemed very soon. “We’ll see.”

Tess smiled and continued to babble on, “Sarah seems so happy. She loves the ring.”

“Does she?” Now that was something he really didn’t want to talk about.

“Oh, yeah. You did a good job. It’s really pretty. Although . . .” She trailed off, sounding . . . almost skeptical or something. “I have to ask.”

“What?” His heart started to beat faster out of nervousness. He knew girls paid attention to this kind of thing, but she wouldn’t possibly remember, would she?

“Well, it’s just that it looks so familiar,” she said, causing the hairs on the back of his neck to stand on end. “Like I remember seeing that same ring three years ago. On Maria’s finger.”

Oh, shit. He should have known this was coming. Of course Kyle wouldn’t recognize it, but Tess would. “She lost that ring,” he reminded her.

“Down the sink, right? I remember.”

“Yeah, so . . .” He felt absolutely no need to tell her the truth about where it had been or how it had found its way back, so he just kept up the lie. “It’s not the same, but it is similar.”

“Okay,” she said. “I just wanted to make sure you didn’t propose to my best friend with a hand-me-down or anything.” She laughed as if it were a joke, but there was nothing funny about it to him.

“No,” he said, guilt swirling inside. “I wouldn’t do that.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Jake was almost a little too well-behaved for Michael’s liking on Monday. They sat through his afternoon classes together, alternating with actual music on the iPod and mimicking music with things like pencil tapping and lap patting. It kept him pacified, for the most part, and when it was time to leave for the day, he actually gave Michael a hug. It was the first normal social interaction Michael had seen from the kid, so it was something to celebrate.

But he couldn’t celebrate, not with the mood he was in. All day, he’d been distracted, unable to truly focus on Jake, or his workout with Kyle, or anything else he’d attempted to do. He could only think about one thing.

He’d just said goodbye to Jake when Dylan came waddling down the hall, a look of concentration on his face as he read something off of a crinkled piece of paper. He was so focused on it that he nearly ran into a few people.

“What you got there, Dylan?” Michael asked him.

He looked up and grumbled, “A note.”

“A note? From who?”

“Emily.”

“Emily? She’s in your class, right?”

“Uh-huh. Look.” Dylan handed him the note, and Michael only had to read the first sentence to know what it was about.

“Uh-oh, you’re in the big leagues now, buddy,” he cautioned. “This is a love note.”

“She loves me?” Dylan sounded surprised.

“No. She just has a crush on you. Take it as a compliment. You’re a stud.”

He made a face of disgust. “But girls are weird.”

“They are,” Michael readily agreed. “But they’re also awesome.”

“Really?”

“Oh, yeah. Trust me, I would know. Girls like me, too.”

“Hmm.” Dylan smiled and took the note back from him, shoving it into his pocket. “My mom likes you,” he stated simply.

Michael fell silent, just staring at Dylan like an idiot. He wanted to ask what he meant by that, but . . . it was probably nothing.

“Bye, Micho!” Dylan chirped. With a little wave, he darted outside.

“Bye,” Michael whispered, watching him go. He scampered out to the loading and unloading zone of the parking lot, where Maria was waiting for him. She knelt down, and he ran straight into her arms and hugged her tightly. She looked happy. Happy to see him, at least. Probably not all that happy overall.

Even though this probably wasn’t the right time or the right place, Michael knew he had to seize the opportunity to talk to her, maybe set things straight. He couldn’t stand the thought that he’d upset her, but he knew he had. That look in her eyes yesterday when she’d seen that ring on Sarah’s hand . . . she’d seemed so broken-hearted.

He hurried outside and got to her just as she was buckling Dylan into his car seat. “Maria. Can we talk?”

She shut the back door of her car and muttered, “No,” avoiding all eye contact with him as she walked around to the other side.

“Please?” he begged, following her.

She whirled around, hand resting on the driver’s side door handle. “No, Michael. There’s nothing to say.”

“Are you kidding?” he spat. “There’s a lot to say.”

She flapped her arms against her sides as if it were no big deal. “You’re engaged. It’s fine. Let’s just leave it at that.”

“But I--”

“Michael.” She stared at him sternly, as if she absolutely refused to have this conversation. “Dylan’s in the car. Let’s not do this right now.”

But if not now, he thought, when? This wasn’t exactly the kind of conversation they could have in the back of the classroom tomorrow. “Maria . . .”

“I don’t wanna talk about it,” she snapped. “Just leave me alone.”

I don’t want to, he thought. He wanted to talk to her, apologize, tell her it’d been a mistake. He’d never intended to use that ring again. It had just . . . it’d just happened.

She got in the car, and he was left with no choice but to step back up onto the sidewalk and wave sullenly at Dylan as she drove away. It wasn’t the first time she’d driven away from him, and at this rate, it probably wouldn’t be the last.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Knock, knock,” Liz said as she came into the house, holding Scarlet’s hand.

All nestled up on the couch, Maria managed a groggy, “Hey,” and a tired smiled.

“Wow, you look all settled in,” Liz remarked. She let go of her daughter’s hand, and Scarlet immediately ran for the Xbox controllers. Even though she didn’t know how to use them, she seemed to enjoy fiddling with the knobs and buttons whenever she was over there.

“Come, grab some couch,” Maria urged her friend, bringing her feet in to make some room. “This is where the party’s at.”

“Clearly.” Liz sat down, and Maria noticed how nice she looked. Full makeup and wavy glamorous hair. She even had on a maroon off-the-shoulder dress that looked new. Apparently this date tonight was a big deal.

“Where’s Dylan?” Liz asked.

“In his room doing homework,” Maria replied.

“How responsible.”

“Well, either that or he’s writing a note to this girl in his class.” She spotted him reading the note from Emily on the way home. She knew what was up.

“Romance?” Liz gasped. “In kindergarten?”

Maria rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Either way he’s writing, so it’s educational.”

Liz laughed lightly. “That’s one way to look at it.” Her eyes drifted over to Scarlet for a moment, and after telling her a few times not to chew on the Xbox controller, she returned her attention to Maria and deduced, “So I take it you finally checked Sarah’s Instagram.”

I must look really down in the dumps then, Maria thought, knowing she’d have to perk up before Max got home. “No, I didn’t,” she said, sitting up a bit. “But I heard the big news. They’re engaged.”

Liz nodded, then asked, “Who told you?”

“They did.”

Liz seemed surprised by that. “Face to face?”

“Mmm-hmm.” She doubted any of it had been planned. Michael would have wanted to tell her alone, and he would have tried like hell not to let her see that ring right away.

“How’d that go?” Liz asked.

Horrible, she thought. Even now, she wished she didn’t know about it. “It was weird, but . . .” She shrugged, trying to seem more at ease with it than she actually really was. “It’s fine. I’m happy for them.”

“Yeah, you look thrilled,” Liz noted sarcastically.

“I’m okay with it,” she insisted, only because she had to be okay with it. “Here, show me those Instagram pics.”

“You sure?” Liz asked, hesitantly taking her phone out of her purse.

“Yes.”

Liz sighed. “Okay.” She slid her thumbs over the screen rapidly, and soon enough, she’d navigated to Sarah’s Instagram and handed the phone over to Maria.

“Cute,” Maria remarked, quelling her resentment when she looked at the first picture, which was the ring on Sarah’s finger. She scrolled to the next one, which was a selfie where Sarah was holding up her hand. “Cute.” The third was probably the hardest to look at, though, because Michael was standing behind her, his arms around her. “Super cute.” She handed the phone back to Liz and commented, “They’re like the perfect couple.”

“They do seem like a good match,” Liz agreed, putting her phone away again. “And that’s a nice ring.”

Maria swallowed hard, agreeing, “Sure is.” She wondered what Sarah would think if she found out she wasn’t the first girl to wear it, though. Surely then she wouldn’t be so eager to post all those photos online. Not that Maria ever planned on telling her. She wasn’t about to be that vindictive.

Itching to change the topic, Maria cleared her throat and asked Liz, “So what’s the sitch? Who you goin’ out with tonight?”

“Oh, you know . . .” Liz squirmed around a bit, then mumbled, “Alex.”

“Alex?” Maria echoed in astonishment. “Wait a minute, I thought you said he ran for the hills when you made a move on him.”

“He did, but . . . I don’t know, I guess he had a change of heart.”

Finally, Maria thought, a little good news. “So you guys are finally officially going out on a date?”

Liz blushed. “Yes.”

“Oh my god, it’s about time. I’m telling you, you two are meant to end up together.”

“Well, I’m not so sure about that,” Liz said, ever the skeptic. “And neither is he, so tonight’s really just about testing the waters and seeing if it’s even possible.”

“And if it’s not?” Maria asked, even though she was pretty sure there would be at least some sparks tonight.

“Then we’ll just stay good friends,” Liz said, as if it were that simple. “At the end of the day, that’s really what means the most to me, you know?”

“Yeah,” Maria said, wishing she did know. She wished her friendship with Michael was so strong, but it was just frustrating that, no matter how close they became, that friend level of their relationship just never did overpower the romantic one. “Well, I hope it goes well,” she said.

“Thanks,” Liz said. “And thanks for watching Scarlet.”

“No problem.” Maria looked at the little girl again, who was now singing some kind of song in her own language and rolling around on the floor. “Now she’s super cute,” she said, wishing it was possible to be that little and carefree again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Liz and Alex had no real plan in mind for their date night. The whole thing still felt sort of strange to Liz, so she dressed for the ambiguity and decided to just go with the flow. And the flow was good. First they stopped at one of Alex’s favorite restaurants for pizza, and after that, they just drove around and talked for a while. Eventually they ended up at The Cave, which was much less packed than it had been on the night of its grand reopening. They ordered drinks, and Liz even got Alex out on the dance floor for a bit. Even though he had two left feet, he didn’t act embarrassed. In fact, it was only when he literally bumped into one of his students out there that he decided to sit back down.

Once they’d had their fill of the club scene, they drove down the street to another bar, an older, less-crowded one. The had another round of drinks and played some pool, then sat and talked some more until they started to feel tired and decided to head home.

It really had been a nice night, and a great date, better than any date Liz had been on in a long time.

Alex drove her home and came inside with her, and that was the only point when it actually started to feel weird. Up until this point, she’d felt relatively normal, like she and Alex were just hanging out as friends. They hadn’t held hands or sat extra close together or flirted or anything. But now that the date was over, it almost seemed like . . . like there was an expectation. To kiss or something.

“Well, I had a great time,” he told her.

“Yeah, me too,” she agreed, setting her purse down on the couch. “I’m really glad we did this.”

“Yeah, it was fun.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets, suddenly looking nervous himself. Did he feel that same expectation? And if he did, would he do anything about it.

“So . . .” She flapped her arms against her sides, unsure of where to go from here. If Scarlet weren’t with Max and Maria tonight, she was sure Alex would have stuck around and played with her for a while if she was awake enough. If not that, he would have sat with her in the chair and rocked her while she slept. But it was just the two of them tonight.

“Well, I should probably get home,” he said, taking a few steps forward. “Unless . . .”

“Unless?” Was he seriously thinking about staying the night? He couldn’t be. That was way too . . . extreme.

He took his hands out of his pockets, reached out to take hers in his, and slowly leaned down, as if he were about to kiss her. Part of her wanted to take a step back, or tell him to stop, just because it felt too strange. Sure, they’d kissed before, slept together even, but that had been a long time ago. Before Max.

Max. The moment she thought of him, he managed to overshadow every amazing thing about this date tonight.

Even so, she closed her eyes and let Alex kiss her. She even tried kissing him back, because . . . well, it was worth a shot. But all she could think about was Max Evans, and how much she wished he was the guy doing this with her.

This wasn’t fair to Alex.

She pulled away sheepishly, wishing she hadn’t let that happen. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt his feelings. But when she caught sight of that knowing, resigned look on his face, she started to feel relieved, because it just seemed like they were on the same page.

“No,” he said.

“No,” she agreed. “I’m sorry.”

He shrugged. “Don’t be sorry. I get it.”

“I just don’t think . . .” She trailed off, sighing frustratedly. “There’s no . . .”

“Chemistry,” he filled in. “I know. At least not the romantic kind.”

“I wish there was,” she mumbled, sitting down on the couch. “It’d make things a lot easier.” This whole harboring feelings for her ex-boyfriend thing was growing very old very fast. And it didn’t help that he was with Maria, who really truly was one of her best friends.

“We can’t force it,” Alex said, sitting down beside her. “At least we gave it a shot, though. Now we know for sure there’s nothing there.”

“Nothing but a really solid friendship,” she said, smiling at him. “You really are my best friend, Alex. You know that, right?”

He smiled back at her, reaching over to pat her leg. “I know,” he said. “You’re my best friend, too.”

Growing up, she’d always thought she would end up marrying her best friend. But apparently that wouldn’t be the case. And honesty, at this point, she felt like she’d be lucky to ever get married at all. It was as if all she could do was compare every single guy to Max. Whether it was something subconscious or calculated, she always did it. And it wasn’t that Alex was inferior to Max in any way. It was just that Max had a hold of a part of her, and even through the ups and downs, that hold hadn’t loosened at all. If anything, it had tightened over the years.

“Can I ask you something?” he inquired suddenly.

“Sure.” He could ask her anything.

But what he did ask . . . caught her off guard. “Are you still in love with Max?”

She froze momentarily, stunned. How did he know? Did he just know her really well, or was she obvious? Had anyone else asked her that question, she surely would have lied, but because it was Alex, she fessed up and told the truth. “Yeah. I am.”

Alex nodded, as if he’d already known the answer. But it was nice that he didn’t react judgmentally at all.

“What about you?” she questioned in return.

He chuckled and joked, “No, I’m not still in love with Max.”

“You know what I mean.”

“What, Leanna?” he filled in. “No, no, that’s over now.”

“Alex.” She gave him a look. “Not Leanna.” It was pretty obvious, to her, at least, that there was still a girl in his heart, and that girl wasn’t his ex-wife.

He took in a deep, shuddering breath, as though he didn’t want to own up to it, even though she already knew. “Who then?” he asked.

“Who else?” Max wasn’t the only Evans who had a magnetic pull over the opposite sex. “Isabel. Do you still have feelings for her?”

Alex was silent for a few seconds as he lowered his head and stared down at the floor. He didn’t seem proud to admit it, but at long last, he did. “Yeah,” he mumbled. “I don’t know why. But I think I always will.”

Liz nodded, understanding. What Alex felt for Isabel was hardly different than what she felt for Max. It was intense, constant, hard to explain. And unrequited.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Oh, Isabel!”

Isabel groaned when Courtney came up the stairs, singing her name at the top of her lungs. Wasn’t it too early to get up? It felt too early.

“Isabel!” Courtney exclaimed, throwing open the bedroom door. “Wake up! You’ve been sleeping all morning.”

“What?” Isabel forced her eyes open and squinted at the numbers on the bedside clock. The furthest number to the left was about three numbers over what it should have been. “Oh my god, I slept through class!” she fretted, sitting up. “Why didn’t my alarm go off?”

“Oh, I turned it off,” Courtney informed her.

“What? Why?”

“Well, we all had such a late night last night, and I figured you needed your sleep. But then you just kept sleeping, and the boys went out, so now I’m really bored.”

Isabel groaned, running her hands through her hair. “You can’t do that, Courtney.” She already missed class enough this semester; she really couldn’t afford to miss anymore.

“It’s just college,” Courtney said. “It’s so pointless, Isabel. I mean, it’s not like you’re really gonna be a famous writer or anything.”

Thanks for that vote of confidence, Isabel thought sarcastically. Courtney was her friend and everything, but she was annoying as hell sometimes. Didn’t mean she was wrong, though. “No, I guess I’m not,” Isabel agreed sullenly. That dream had faded away, right along with Princeton.

“Now that you’re finally up . . .” Courtney hopped onto the foot of the bed, looking like an excited puppy or something. “Guess what?”

“What?” Chances were, whatever Courtney was bursting at the seams to tell her, it wouldn’t be all that interesting.

“Michael got engaged.”

Isabel’s eyebrows show up. Okay, she thought, so I was wrong. That was interesting. “Where’d you hear that from?” she asked.

“Friend of a friend . . . of a friend of a friend. Word gets around.”

“Huh.” Had it not already happened once before, it probably would have been more shocking. But still . . . it definitely threw Isabel for a loop. “Who’d he pop the question to this time?”

“His Asian girlfriend,” Courtney replied.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Why do you sound so surprised? She’s hot. I’d totally do her.”

“Yeah, she’s really pretty,” Isabel acknowledged—Michael didn’t really date ugly girls. “But . . .” There was just one problem that she could see. “I just didn’t think he’d ask her to marry him.”

“Oh, right,” Courtney said. “He is more of the ‘hit it, don’t commit it’ type.”

Isabel shook her head. “No, I don’t think he has a problem with committing,” she said. “I just didn’t think he would. Not to her.”

“Why not?” Courtney asked.

Isabel laughed angrily, recalling all sorts of unpleasant memories of betrayal at his hands. “Because she’s not Maria.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In desperate need of an energy boost, Michael stopped by the student union for coffee before class. He didn’t even know what exactly it was that he ordered, but the barista assured him it was full of caffeine. Taking one look at it, though, Michael was unimpressed. It seemed like a hell of a lot of foam and not a whole lot else.

“Hey, is there even any coffee in here?” he asked, a bit more demanding than he usually would have been. He wasn’t in a good mood today, which meant anything could set him off. This pathetic excuse for coffee could be that thing.

“Yeah, it’s exactly what you ordered,” the barista said.

“I ordered coffee,” Michael snapped. “This is like air. I don’t wanna drink air.”

The barista just shrugged helplessly, clueless, and Michael was about to demand a refund. Or a new cup of coffee. Or something. But all of a sudden, there was Isabel, sidling right up next to him, obviously about to make his morning even worse.

“Now, now, Michael, don’t be rude,” she scolded.

He rolled his eyes, stepping out of the line, and of course she followed him. “What do you want?” he grumbled.

“God, you’re in a bad mood,” she remarked. “I wouldn’t think someone who’s recently engaged would be so testy.”

He stopped and gave her a hard look. “Who the hell told you?”

“Just heard it through the grapevine.” She took his coffee right out of his hand and took a sip. “Mmm. Do you not want this then? ‘cause I’ll take it.”

“Whatever.” He turned to walk away, but she must have been feeling especially obnoxious today, because she scurried in front of him, blocking his progress.

“So are you really gonna do it?” she asked almost tauntingly. “Marry someone who’s not Maria?” She gasped exaggeratedly and brought her free hand up to cover her mouth. “Shocking.”

“Maria and I aren’t together,” he pointed out. “We haven’t been for a long time.”

“Right, but . . . I’m gonna assume you’re still in love with her, because you’re . . . well, you know . . . you.”

Even if she was right, there was no way he’d have this conversation with her. Hell no. He hadn’t even been able to have it with Kyle. “I’m in love with Sarah,” he informed her. “Deeply, truly, madly in love. That’s why I proposed to her.”

Isabel narrowed her eyes at him doubtfully. “Are you sure?”

No, he thought, but he didn’t miss a beat. “Yes. You see, that’s what happens when a guy loves a girl, Isabel. He asks her to marry him. Now, I don’t expect you to ever experience that, because the only thing your boyfriend loves is his porn business.”

She glared at him and deadpanned, “Funny.”

“But I do love Sarah, and I am gonna marry her. So I think what you should be saying is congratulations.”

“Oh, I would congratulate you,” she said, “if I thought for a second you were gonna go through with it.”

God, Isabel Evans, you are such a bitch, he thought, rolling his eyes, pretending to just be annoyed with her. But the truth was, he was unnerved, and not because of her attitude. Because of her skepticism.

“Goodbye, Isabel,” he said, pushing past her, eager to get out of there.

“I know I’m right, Michael!” she called after him as he walked away. “I know you!”

No, you don’t, he thought, trying his hardest to forget everything she’d just said.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Music class that day was pointless because Maria wasn’t there. Michael sat through the whole thing, just in case she showed up, but she never did. Work the next afternoon was pointless, too, because Maria also wasn’t there. Spencer came in to work the shift with Michael instead. Frustrated by all the avoidance, he tried to reach her. Phone calls that resulted in voicemails. Texts that were left unanswered. It was like she was deliberately trying to cut herself off from him.

He showed up early to class on Thursday, hoping and praying that today would be different. If he could just see her and say something to her, then maybe they could straighten this whole thing out. It killed him to think that he might have screwed up his relationship with her. Friendship. Whatever the hell it was.

He waited and waited while the other students started to flock into the classroom. Gradually, the seats became more and more filled up, and the clock ticked closer and closer to the start time. He was starting to think she wouldn’t show, or worse, that she’d perhaps dropped the class entirely or switched to the other professor’s section; but then suddenly, there she was, barely peeking her head in the door, as if she weren’t sure whether or not she was going to enter.

“Alright, let’s go ahead and get started,” the professor said.

Come on, Maria, Michael thought, but she didn’t even make eye contact with him as she shut the door and left. No.

“We’ve got a new decade of music to study,” the professor went on, “and while it may lack the notoriety of the sixties or the infamy of the eighties, there is certainly still a lot to appreciate about the music of the 1970s.”

Screw this, Michael thought, shooting up from his seat. He was in such a hurry to get out of there that he almost left without his backpack.

He rushed out of the room, not bothering to be polite or quiet on his way out, and raced down the hall after Maria, who had a pretty quick pace going herself. “Maria, wait!” he called, catching up with her.

“Let’s not do this, Michael,” she mumbled, still zooming forward, her eyes fixed in front of her. “Not here.”

“I just wanna talk to you.” Was that really so much to ask? “What’re you gonna do, ignore me for the rest of your life?”

She grunted. “I wish.”

He followed her out the door and down the steps, about to get in front of her and just fucking block her progress at this point. “Maria, please!”

She stopped abruptly and whirled around, her hair practically whipping his face as it swung over her shoulder. “I don’t know what you expect me to say,” she ground out.

“I just want you to talk to me.” He didn’t even care if she yelled, because he knew he deserved it. “I miss you.”

That seemed to soften her a bit. Her angry frown morphed into more of a sad pout, and she took a few steps back. “Look, I’m not . . . I’m not mad that you asked her to marry you,” she told him. “She’s a really good person, and you guys are great together.”

Are we? he wondered. Lately, he wasn’t so sure. “Maria . . .”

“But the same exact ring, Michael?” she cut in, her voice shrill with emotion. “You had to propose to her with the same exact ring you gave me?”

He felt helpless, because there was no way to let her know that it had been a mistake without divulging too much. If she knew he’d just happened to have that ring in his hand when Sarah had walked in, then she’d have even more questions, ones he wasn’t prepared to answer. “I’m sorry,” he apologized, not sure what else he could say.

“You said that was my ring.”

“You didn’t want it,” he reminded her. “You gave it back to me.”

She threw her hands up in the air, looking exasperated now. “Not so you could give it to her!” Tears sprang to her eyes suddenly, and her voice was quiet and broken when she squeaked out, “How could you, Michael? How could you do this to me?”

Those words . . . they were like a knife to his heart. He’d never meant to cause her any pain, and he hated himself for it.

“And it’s not fair to Sarah, either,” she added. “I’m guessing she doesn’t know. But how do you think she’d feel if she knew I used to wear that ring?”

Common sense told him to stay quiet, but impulse got the best of him, and he snapped, “How do you think I feel knowing you’re back together with the guy who stole it?”

“Oh, so is that what this is about? You’re trying to spite me?”

“No! It’s just . . .” He stopped and took a breath to prevent himself from getting riled up. “Look, you know me; you know how I am. Sometimes I do stupid things.”

“But you’re not a stupid guy,” she pointed out, “so why didn’t you just use a different ring? Her own ring.”

“I don’t know.” He wished like hell he had. Then they could have avoided this whole issue. He flapped his arms against his sides and decided, “I’ll get a different one now.”

She laughed tearfully at the ridiculousness of that idea. “No you can’t. You gave her that ring. It’s hers now.”

No, it’s not, he thought. Maybe he could take it from her, just like Max had taken it from Maria. He could use the down-the-drain excuse, get her a new one. And give this one back to Maria. Just so she had it. Because it was still hers.

“It just hurts, that’s all,” Maria told him, gulping back tears. He could see all her emotions right there, right on the edge, about to pour over. But somehow, she kept them in. “But I’ll get over it,” she said, forcing a smile. But it was the sad kind, and those were always hard to look at. She turned her back to him just as her tears started to fall, and slowly this time, she walked away. And even though he would have only had to have taken one step to keep up with two of hers, he let her go this time, sensing that she needed space.

She didn’t look like she was getting over it, though. She didn’t look like she was over anything.








TBC . . .

-April

[keepsmiling7]

Great part.....
It appears that everyone's true feelings are beginning to show.
Wonder when Max will finally realize that Maria doesn't want to be with him??
Tess and Kyle with twins.......they're going to need lots of help!
That is a strange date between Alex and Liz.
Thanks,
Carolyn

[sarammlover]

this gang makes me so tired. I am sad Michael is reverting back to his old self. It seemed he had made such progress and now this. I agree 100% with Maria though and look at Tess....she knows deep down that is Maria's ring....this is a mess....

[April]

Carolyn:

It appears that everyone's true feelings are beginning to show.

Yep, or at least they're beginning to show to us, not necessarily to each other.

Wonder when Max will finally realize that Maria doesn't want to be with him??

Max has lulled himself into this complacent sense of security, it seems. He really needs to open up his eyes.

That is a strange date between Alex and Liz.

Just no romantic chemistry whatsoever!


Sara:

this gang makes me so tired.

I am sad Michael is reverting back to his old self. It seemed he had made such progress and now this.

I know, it's kind of sad.

I agree 100% with Maria though and look at Tess....she knows deep down that is Maria's ring....this is a mess....

The ring . . . man, the ring just makes this whole bad situation even worse.


Thanks for reading and leaving feedback!

Merry Christmas!








Part 54








The whole day sucked for Michael. Work was long, longer than it was supposed to be because he had to wait around for a half an hour for the next person on duty to show up. And after that, he was only able to spend about an hour at Pound with Jake. And it wasn’t a good hour. Apparently one of the other kids had yelled at Jake that morning, and another had shoved him, and he’d been hysterical about it all day. Michael ended up calling Jake’s mom to come get him before the day was even over with.

When he got home, at least something smelled good. Sarah was in the kitchen making some brand new concoction, and whatever it was, he’d try it, because it was bound to be delicious.

“Hey,” she said.

“Hey.” He hadn’t expected her to be there, though, at least not right when he got home. “No work today?”

“Nope.” She rose up on her tiptoes, angling her cheek towards him, and he kissed it quickly.

“How was your day?” she asked, stirring some soupy mixture in a large pot.

He sugarcoated it, just because there was no need to rehash. “Fine. You?”

“It was good,” she said, turning down the heat for the burner she was using. She covered up the pot and wiped her hands off on one of the towels hanging from the oven handle. “So did you see Maria today?” she asked.

That struck him as a weird question, but he answered it honestly. “Yeah, in class. Why?”

“Oh, well . . . you remember my friend Holly?”

He gave her a confused look.

“My friend from chemistry class?”

Holly, Holly . . . nope, the only Holly he knew was a girl he’d slept with back in high school, and no way was that chick smart enough for chemistry. “Not really,” he replied.

“Well, she remembers you. She said she saw you on campus today. Talking to a blonde girl. Who I assumed was Maria.”

He’d been a little worried about that, having that conversation with her outside. Not many people had passed them by, but there had definitely been a few who were rushing to their classes. “Yeah, we talked,” he admitted.

Sarah nodded, but clearly there was a reason for all of this. “Actually, she said it kinda looked like you were arguing.”

Shit, he thought. So much for honesty. “Oh, that. No that was—that was nothing,” he said flippantly. “She was mad at me ‘cause I was braggin’ about this grade I got on our last quiz. I deserved it, really. I was bein’ an ass.”

“Oh, I see,” she said, apparently buying into that. “Well, that’s a relief. I thought maybe she was mad about . . . other stuff.”

Michael just played dumb, acting like he had no idea what that ‘other stuff’ could even be. “What do you mean?”

“Just . . .” She shrugged. “Us. Our engagement.”

He felt his stomach start to tighten, but he remained calm and casual. “No. No, she’s—she’s fine with that. She even told me she thinks we’re great together. And we are, so . . .” He put his hands on her shoulders and rubbed them. “You don’t have to worry about that.”

She sighed, still seemingly . . . well, worried. “I just wonder if maybe I was a little too excited or, like, exuberant when I told her,” she fretted. “I mean, yeah, she’s my friend, but she’s your ex-girlfriend. Ex-fiancée, actually. I never even stopped to consider that maybe I was being insensitive. I shouldn’t have been so spastic about it; I should’ve toned it down. Or maybe I should’ve just let you tell her.”

He would have liked that, to be able to just pull her aside after class in that room that was never locked. They’d already had plenty of difficult conversations in there. It would have been the right spot to have one more. And then he would have had time to plan out what to say, and maybe it wouldn’t have caught her so off guard. But Sarah didn’t have to be feeling guilty about any of what had or hadn’t happened. “No, Sarah, don’t . . . don’t beat yourself up over this, okay?” he said. “You deserve to be happy.”

“But what if I was, like, obnoxiously happy?” she worried.

“You weren’t.”

“I wasn’t trying to rub it in her face or anything.”

“You didn’t.” He wasn’t about to let her feel bad for feeling excited. “Don’t worry. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Are you sure?” she asked.

“Yeah.” He had, but she hadn’t. “Trust me, Maria’s really . . .” He tried not to picture those tears in her eyes as he said, “She’s really happy for us. Really happy.”

At last, Sarah’s relief seemed to overpower her concern, and a smile found its way to her face. And she looked happy again, too. She looped her arms around his neck and hugged him, and he hugged her back, waiting for her to let go. But she didn’t. She just liked being held by him. So he held her, trying to ignore that sinking feeling in his gut, the one that got stronger and stronger with each lie that piled up.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Relief surged through Maria when she checked her phone and saw a mass text message sent by her music professor. “Oh, thank God.”

“What?” Liz asked as she took a cupcake tin out of the oven.

“My music class got cancelled. Professor’s sick.”

Liz set the cupcakes down on the counter and turned off the oven. “I thought you liked that class,” she said.

“I do. It’s just . . .” Michael, she thought. She didn’t want to have to see him or deal with him at all today. “It’s just really boring right now,” she fibbed.

“I see.” Liz reached into the glass display case and took out two meticulously frosted doughnuts. Maria shook her head to politely decline, and Liz put one of them back, taking the other out for herself.

“So is it official that you and Alex are dunzo when it comes to dating now?” Maria asked. “Or is there still hope?” The whole reason why she’d stopped by Liz’s bakery in the first place was to get the scoop. And kill some time to avoid going to class. But at least that wasn’t an issue anymore.

Liz took a bite of the doughnut and shook her head. “No, there’s no hope. We both agree that it’s just not a romantic thing. And that’s okay. At least we gave it a shot.”

“Yeah,” Maria agreed, disappointed. She’d really been hoping for some sparks between the two of them. “That’s too bad, though. It just would’ve been so easy.”

“It would’ve,” Liz agreed, but she didn’t sound broken-hearted about it at all.

“Okay, do you know if he still has a thing for Isabel then?” Maria was well aware that she was being nosy, but it was just nice to delve into someone else’s love life instead of dwelling on her own. “Because I noticed him noticing her at Christmas.”

Liz gave her a look that said it all. “I’m not supposed to say anything,” she mumbled.

“So he does,” Maria concluded. “Oh my god, why? I don’t get that. He’s so mature and dignified, and she is an absolute train wreck.”

“I know. He knows, too. But you know how it goes sometimes. No matter how hard you try to control it or talk yourself out of it . . .” Liz shrugged. “The heart wants what it wants.”

Maria thought about that for a moment and nodded slowly, reluctantly. Considering the state her own heart was in lately . . . that made it a lot easier to understand.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Weren’t weekends meant for sleeping in? Michael felt it was way too early for anyone to be up and knocking on his door Saturday morning. “What the hell?” he groaned, trudging to the door. He opened it, expecting Kyle to be waiting out there for him, wanting another early morning workout. But instead, he came face to face with his mom and his sister.

“Surprise!” his mother exclaimed.

“What?” He was so confused what they were doing there.

“We thought we’d come visit,” she said, pulling him into a hug. “Oh, I missed you.”

He was still too out of it to really formulate a sentence, but when he glanced at his little sister, he managed to. “You’re so round.” She looked like a giant beach ball, or like that blueberry girl from the Willy Wonka movie.

“Shut up,” she yelped while simultaneously allowing him to put his arm around her and hug her to his side. She made a face and commented, “Ew, you stink.”

“I haven’t showered yet.”

“Are you guys still sleeping?” his mother asked, trying to peer over his shoulder inside the apartment. “It’s after 9:00.”

Was it? Huh. It was sort of gloomy and cloudy out, so it felt earlier. “Late night,” he explained.

Tina looked up at Krista and clarified, “That means sex, Mom.”

“Thanks, sweetie, I got it,” she said.

From inside, Sarah started to stir, and Michael heard her call his name. “Michael? What’s going on?”

He glanced back over his shoulder and replied, “We have company.”

Showering was the first step for Michael that morning. Sarah made breakfast while he did that, and even though they both had already eaten that morning, neither his mother nor his sister turned down an omelet from Sarah. Tina even asked for a second one, using the excuse that she was eating for two. When Michael got out of the shower, there weren’t any omelets left for him, because apparently they’d run out of eggs. Sarah made him pancakes instead, though, which suited him just fine. He gobbled them down while she took her turn in the shower, and once she was out, she sat down in the living room with her future in-laws while Michael opted to do the dishes.

“Now, don’t you two worry; we’re not gonna inconvenience you too much,” his mom assured Sarah. “I’ve got a hotel room, so we’ll just sleep there tonight.”

“Yeah, we just don’t have enough room here,” Sarah said. “Sorry.”

“Oh, don’t apologize. We’re the ones who showed up unannounced.”

“Mom just had to bring your engagement gift in person,” Tina, who was sprawled out on the floor on a pile of pillows, added.

“Isn’t it a little early?” Michael asked from the kitchen.

“Oh, no.” His mother turned to look at him and informed him, “This is just one of many gifts, by the way. There will be more.” She then got up and took her jacket off the coat rack, rummaging through the pockets for a small envelope. She brought it back to Sarah and urged, “Go ahead and open it.”

“Oh, okay.” Sarah sliced open the envelope with a fingernail, and her eyes got wide when she pulled out a check. “Oh my gosh, Krista . . . no way, this is too nice of you.”

Michael forgot about the dishes and sauntered towards them. “What is it?” he asked.

She handed it to him, and his eyes bulged a little, too. A thousand dollar check. “Wow.” That was a nice-looking number.

“We can’t take that,” Sarah said politely.

“Of course we can,” Michael said, feeling no such inclination to even try to turn it down. “Thank you, Mom.”

“You’re welcome,” she said. “You know, I just figured you’ll have to get your own home someday—somewhere not on campus—and maybe a small donation from me can help you furnish it or . . . I don’t know, decorate it or something.”

“It’s not a small donation at all,” Sarah assured her, even though her own family’s finances were far superior. “It’s very generous. Thank you so much.” She leaned over and hugged her. “You know what? I’m so lucky,” she raved. “I hit the jackpot in the boyfriend department and the mother in-law-department.”

“And the sister-in-law department,” Tina added.

“That, too.”

Krista laughed. “Well, I couldn’t ask for a better daughter-in-law, that’s for sure. So I’m thrilled that’s what you’re gonna be to me.”

“Aw . . .” Sarah placed one hand over her heart. “That’s so sweet.”

Michael frowned, though. Was she more excited at the prospect of having Sarah as a daughter-in-law than she had been with Maria? Because it seemed like it. And his mom had always loved Maria. So why did this excite her more?

“I actually brought something else, too,” Krista said. “Thought it was appropriate.” She bent forward and picked up a large book—what looked like a photo album—off the floor. Michael hadn’t even noticed her bring it in.

“Oh, your wedding album!” Sarah exclaimed as Krista set it on her lap. She traced her fingers over the leather-bound cover, which had Mr. and Mrs. Guerin engraved onto it. “Gosh, this is beautiful.”

“We couldn’t afford a fancy photographer, but the pictures still turned out nice,” Krista said.

“Definitely.” Sarah opened to the first page, which was a large photo of the two of them at the altar, arms around each other. Michael peered down at it over her shoulder, amazed by how young his parents used to look. He didn’t remember them ever looking that young.

“I love your dress,” Sarah remarked.

“That wasn’t fancy, either,” Krista acknowledged. “But I needed something to accommodate the baby bump.”

Upon closer inspection, Michael noticed that bump. His mom’s dress had been long and loose, sort of like something that belonged in the sixties. It had concealed her pregnancy well.

“Wow,” Sarah said as she flipped to another page. It had photos of the once happy couple kissing and laughing. “You guys look really in love.”

“We were,” Krista said, smiling wistfully.

Michael didn’t remember them ever looking like that, either. He cast a quick glance at his sister, and he noticed that she’d sat up on the floor to get a better look at the photos. But there were tears in her eyes.

“Hey,” he said, sensing that she needed to get out of there just as much as he did. “You wanna go for a walk?”

She smiled gratefully and nodded.

They left their mother and Sarah to look through the rest of the wedding album. It was different for them, because Sarah had never known Andy Guerin, and Krista had once known a different version of him. But the only father Michael remembered was the one who had hated his guts, and Tina . . . well, she probably couldn’t think about him without remembering what it had been like to find him dead in his bed.

“So that was kinda weird, huh? Seein’ pictures of Mom and Dad back then,” he said as they strolled out past the putting green and the beach volleyball courts near Vidorra. Normally, people would be utilizing them, but it was too cold this morning.

“Yeah, it was weird,” she agreed, pulling the sleeves of her oversized sweatshirt down over her hands. “I wish Dad would’ve stayed that happy.”

“Me, too,” Michael agreed, wondering if things would have gone differently for him, for both of them, if the guy hadn’t been such a downright depressed alcoholic.

“I gotta sit,” Tina said, holding one hand to her back. She waddled towards a bench and sat down eagerly, and Michael scooted in next to her. She really was huge, and she still had over a month to go.

“I think he’d be happy for you now,” she said, much to his surprise.

“Really?” He had a hard time picturing his dad ever being happy for him.

“Yeah. I bet he’d like Sarah. Everybody likes Sarah.”

“True.” Actually, his dad had always liked Isabel, too. But he’d never liked Maria.

“So . . .” Tina looked at him expectantly and asked, “How’d you get that ring back?”

His stomach clenched, but he tried to look . . . confused, mostly. “What?”

“The ring,” she repeated. “It’s the same one you gave Maria.”

Uh-oh, he thought. Time to play dumb. “No, it’s not.”

She didn’t buy it for a second, though. “Yeah, it is. I helped you pick it out. I remember what it looks like.”

She’d been in fifth grade at the time, though. Honestly, he’d been hoping she would have forgotten. “That ring went down a sink drain,” he reminded her.

“Yeah, so that’s why I’m asking how you got it back.”

Clearly denying it wasn’t going to work on her. She was a smart kid, and there was no way he could pull one over on her. “Turns out it never went down the drain,” he revealed. “Max stole it.”

“Max?” she echoed, an immediate edge of hysteria to her voice. “The guy who took Dylan?”

“Yeah.” Part of him loved that, while everyone else was so busy giving Max a second chance, Tina would always think of him simply as the guy who took Dylan. Not the guy who was reformed, not Dylan’s father. Just a creep. “Oh, and then he sold it, tracked it down and bought it back, gave it to Maria for Christmas this year.”

“Wait, Max proposed to Maria?”

“No, he just gave her the ring back,” Michael clarified. “And then she gave it to me.”

“And you gave it to Sarah.” She nodded, taking that all in. “Wow.”

Yeah, that ring had certainly made the rounds, more than he wished it had. “Don’t tell her, okay?”

“Oh, I won’t,” she promised.

“It’s just . . .” He tried to come up with a plausible excuse for how any of this had happened, and the only one that came to mind was a pretty stupid one. “Rings are expensive, so I was trying to be responsible. You know, financially.”

“Whatever you say.” She didn’t sound like she believed him.

“I feel kinda bad about it,” he admitted. Like Maria had said the other day, it wasn’t fair to her or to Sarah. He’d wronged both of them by reusing that ring, but Sarah didn’t even realize it.

“Hey, I think it’s a good thing, in a way,” Tina said. “I mean, if you’re willing to part with that ring, then that means you’re completely over Maria, right?”

He wished that was what it meant. He wished it were that simple. “Right.”

“Yeah, so . . . it’s good,” she reiterated.

He nodded mutely, pretending he agreed with that. But in his heart, he knew the truth: There was nothing good about it. He’d been telling a lot of lies lately, but he couldn’t lie to himself.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Even though she’d done everything in her power to rearrange shifts with other people, Maria ended up working the front desk at Vidorra Saturday afternoon. At least it was a solo shift, though, so as long as Michael didn’t come down, she’d be fine. No drama. No emotions. Just work.

She’d just begun the mind-numbing task of logging roommate complaints for Brody to review when a very large girl stepped off the elevator and made a beeline for the vending machine. Maria probably wouldn’t have even noticed her had it not been so obvious that she was pregnant, so that made her do a double take. And when she did, she realized that wasn’t just any girl, and it definitely wasn’t even in a college student. It was Michael’s sister.

“Tina?” she called.

Tina glanced over her shoulder and didn’t even crack a smile. “Oh. Maria,” she said coldly before shifting her focus back to the machine in front of her. “You work here now?”

“Yeah, for a couple months now.”

“Of course.” Tina rapidly punched a few numbers, and the machine dispensed a bag of chips for her. There was another one dangling right on the edge, though, so she whacked the side of the machine with surprising strength, and it fell. Smirking, she reached down into the bottom of the machine and grabbed the two bags.

“How are you?” Maria asked her.

Tina flapped her arms against her sides and shuffled towards the front desk. “Pregnant,” she replied. “You?”

“Not so much.” She remembered what it felt like to be that pregnant, though. There was a lot of soreness, mostly, and fear when you were young like Tina was. “So are you—are you visiting your brother?”

“Yeah,” Tina confirmed. “So is my mom. She wanted to congratulate Michael and Sarah on their engagement in person.”

Of course, Maria thought bitterly, the engagement. “Yeah, that’s . . . that’s the big news.” At this point, she just wanted them to get married and be done with it so she didn’t have to think about it anymore.

“It’s pretty cool,” Tina said. “Have you seen her ring?”

Maria shuddered inwardly. “Yeah, I have.”

“It’s really pretty, isn’t it?”

Though she was pretty sure Tina was just trying to rub it in her face that Michael had totally moved on, there wasn’t a whole lot she could do but just go along with it. “It looks like it was made for her to wear,” she forced herself to say.

Tina stared at her intensely and said, “I couldn’t agree more.” Then, the same way she’d smirked at that vending machine, she grinned at Maria and said, “See ya,” before heading back to the elevator. Maria waited until she had gotten back on and the doors had shut before she allowed her frown to set in. Was this really what she was going to have to do from here on out, pretend to be happy for Michael and his perfect girlfriend? Pretend it didn’t bother her to see her ring on someone else’s finger? Because all of this pretending was really going to take its toll on her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Once evening settled in, it started to rain. And then it started to rain harder, and it didn’t let up. Michael didn’t want his mom out driving in that, even though she assured him it was just a short distance to the hotel. So he made her stay, at least until it let up. The rain eventually turned into a full-on storm, and that storm messed with their cable, so they were left with only a few channels where the signal was strong enough to actually show anything.

Michael wasn’t even sure what they were watching. Some old-fashioned movie he didn’t really give a rat’s ass about, but his mom seemed to be enjoying it enough. Tina thought it was boring, though, so she went and laid on his bed and ended up falling asleep pretty quickly. Michael gave his mom the couch, just so she could nod off, too, if she wanted to, but she stayed awake. He sat with Sarah on the floor, and eventually, she put her head down on his lap and fell asleep. His legs were numb now, but he wasn’t going to move, because he wanted her to keep sleeping.

During the commercial break, he craned his neck back and quietly asked his mom, “So are you and Teenie back on good terms now?”

“We’re making progress,” his mom replied. “It’s been better since Christmas. I’ve been trying to have a more open mind about Nicholas, and I think she appreciates that.”

Michael nodded, understanding how that could be a good thing, knowing that he was going to have to do the same. But he still didn’t have to like it. “You’re not gonna let him move in, are you?” he asked, hoping she wasn’t going to have that much of an open mind.

“Well, it wouldn’t be the first time I let someone move in,” she reminded him, smiling.

Maria hadn’t been his girlfriend, though, not right away. And she’d been desperate. “That was different.”

“Yeah, it was,” she agreed. “Although, I have to say, I’m surprised she even wanted to stay with us. We were a pretty dysfunctional family sometimes.”

“Not always,” Michael muttered, thinking about those pictures he’d glimpsed today. “Not until I came along.”

His mother frowned and reached down to squeeze his shoulder gently. “Don’t say that.”

“Why not?” he grunted. “Proof’s in the pictures. You guys used to love each other. I messed that up.”

“You didn’t mess anything up,” she assured him. “You and Tina are the best things that have ever happened to me. Don’t ever forget that.”

As nice as that was to imagine . . . he doubted it was true. His poor mom had gone through a lot of stress and grief because of him, because of all his wild antics in high school. And even if he somehow was the best thing that had ever happened to her, did it really matter when he was the worst thing that had happened to his dad?

“You know what?” she said, her voice taking on that loving, compassionate tone mothers were so good at. “If your dad was still alive, I think he’d be proud of you.”

Michael almost laughed at that. “Really?” That sounded a little too wishful thinking for him.

“Oh, yes,” she insisted confidently. “You’ve taken the path in life he always wanted to take. And now look at you. You’ve grown up. You’re a good man.”

Am I? he wondered, looking down at the sleeping girl in his lap. She thought he was good. In fact, she, like his mom, thought he was the best thing that had ever happened to her. But what if she was wrong? What if he disappointed her the same way he’d disappointed his dad? What if she ended up resenting him the same way?

“Sometimes I don’t think I’m good enough,” he confessed, his voice merely a whisper. He didn’t even have to glance back at his mom to know she had a concerned look on her face now, to know that it bothered her to hear him say that. But he had to say it, because it was true, and nobody else was saying it to him.

He carefully stroked Sarah’s hair as she slept, feeling like he didn’t even deserve to. And she just kept sleeping peacefully, unaware of just how wide awake he was.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Michael got a taste of just how dominating his and Sarah’s impending nuptials were at breakfast the next morning. They took his mom and sister out to YellowBrix, and while they were there, the wedding completely took over the entire conversation. It was all his mom wanted to talk about, and Sarah was more than happy to go along with it. She showed Krista all sorts of things on Pinterest, things Michael couldn’t care less about. Like floral arrangements. Who the hell gave two shits about floral arrangements? Only girls, apparently, because his mom had marked a few in a bridal magazine, which she just happened to bring along with her.

Michael sat across from Tina while his mom and girlfriend gabbed on one side of the table. Tina was on her phone, and Michael just assumed she was texting Nicholas. But when his own phone vibrated, he was glad to see a message from his sister. i’m bored, it read.

He smirked and sent back, me too. She laughed a little when she got it. Even if it was just a simple text, it felt nice for the two of them to finally be on the same page about something again.

Once the wedding talk ceased, it actually wasn’t a bad breakfast. His mom asked how classes had been going this semester, and he gave her the abridged version . . . also known as the version that didn’t include the whole Billy/suspension fiasco.

After breakfast, they drove back to campus, and Sarah insisted they come inside and stay a little longer. The wedding talk started up again, and Michael pretended to be engrossed in the NFL pre-show so he didn’t have to take part in it.

Around noon, Tina was clearly starting to get impatient, so it was time to go. Michael and Sarah walked them out into the parking lot, and while Sarah said goodbye to Tina, Michael gave his mom a hug.

“Oh, it was good seeing you,” she said. “I hope we didn’t disrupt your weekend too much.”

“No,” he assured her, “we didn’t have anything going on.” Sure, there had been a party last night he’d maybe wanted to go to, but it probably would have been lame anyway. Besides, he wasn’t really in a partying mood.

“Well, it was fun,” she said.

“Yeah.” He was exhausted and sore from having slept on the floor last night—the storm never had let up—so he’d definitely be down for a nap once they were gone. But it hadn’t been the worst weekend ever. “Thanks again for the check.”

“Thanks again for the daughter-in-law,” she returned. “Or future daughter-in-law, I should say.”

“Hmm.” He tried to smile, but it didn’t really turn out.

She narrowed her eyes at him, looking him up and down intently, almost as if she were studying him, and then out of nowhere, she asked, “Are you okay?”

Do I not look okay? he wondered. He’d really been trying his hardest to look okay. “Why wouldn’t I be?” he questioned back.

“I don’t know. You just seem . . .” She trailed off, still staring at him, and shook her head.

“Mom, let’s go!” Tina called as she lumbered towards the car with one hand on her stomach. “I told Nicholas I’d be home an hour ago.”

Krista sighed. “I guess that’s my cue.”

Thank God, Michael thought. Clearly his mom knew something was up with him, and he needed her gone before she got any more suspicious.

“Come here,” she said, grabbing his face in her hands, pulling it down so she could kiss his cheek. “I love you, Michael.”

“Love you, too,” he echoed. “Drive safe.”

“Bye.” She smiled at him, that proud kind of smile he’d only really gotten to see in recent years, and then headed for the car. She stopped and gave Sarah a hug on the way, and then when Tina started honking the horn insistently, she said, “Alright, alright!” and got in the driver’s seat.

Sarah came to stand beside Michael on the sidewalk and coiled her fingers around his arm, scooting in close. “Bye!” she called, waving as they drove away. Michael managed a wave, too, but that was about it. Once they pulled out of the parking lot and turned the corner, driving out of sight, he breathed a sigh of relief. Thankfully they hadn’t stayed longer, because if they had, he was sure they would have realized something was wrong.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tina giggled when Nicholas sent her a dirty text. Her mom wasn’t a stickler about monitoring her cell phone or anything, but just in case, she was going to have to delete that one. Totally inappropriate, even though she loved every word of it.

“How’d your brother seem to you?” her mother suddenly inquired.

“What?” Tina glanced up and saw that they were stopped at a red light, about to turn onto the highway that led out of town. How long had her mom been talking? She hadn’t been listening.

“Michael. Did he seem like his usual self?” her mom asked. She sounded concerned.

“Pretty much,” Tina replied. “Seemed find to me.” Sure, the whole ring thing was a little suspect, but her mom hadn’t recognized it, so there was no need to clue her in.

“Because I thought he was quiet,” Krista continued on, making a left turn when the light turned green. “I don’t know. Something seemed off.”

“You think?” He definitely hadn’t been a major chatterbox, but what guy was when it came to wedding stuff? That was totally a girl’s domain.

“I just hope he’s not overwhelmed by all of this,” her mother went on. “Marriage is a big deal. I hope he’s ready for it.”

“Oh, he’s ready,” Tina assured her. “Trust me.” If he wasn’t, then why would he have popped the question in the first place? Still, it didn’t hurt to give her mother some extra reassurance. “In fact, when we went out for a walk yesterday, all he could talk about is how he’s so in love with Sarah and he can’t wait to marry her. He’s really excited.” She figured there was no harm in exaggerating it, because even if Michael hadn’t shown it on the outside, that had to be how he was feeling on the inside. Right?

“Oh, good,” her mom said. She loosened her grip on the steering wheel, and her entire posture relaxed. “Good. I feel better hearing that.”

Then that was mission accomplished as far as Tina was concerned. Even though her mom didn’t think she cared about her much anymore, the fact of the matter was that she was the only parent she had left; and if a little white lie put her mind at ease, Tina was happy to tell it. After all, there was no need for her to stress and worry about something when there was probably nothing to worry about.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria didn’t want to give Max the wrong idea that evening, so she didn’t lie too close to him, didn’t make any move to touch him. It wasn’t that he didn’t look good lying there with his shirt off, because he did. Max had always been in shape, and the fact that his job involved plenty of physical labor had only accentuated his muscles. But she just wasn’t in the mood for sex, and thankfully, it seemed, neither was he. He didn’t seem all that tired, either, though, because he lay awake with her for well over half an hour, talking, saying some things that genuinely did make her laugh. And it felt good to laugh again after so many days of being miserable.

But eventually, he got serious. “So . . .” he said, pausing then to clear this throat. “Are you ever gonna tell me?”

“Tell you what?” she asked.

In the darkness of their bedroom, she heard him look over at her more than she actually saw it. “How you feel about Michael and Sarah getting engaged.”

“Oh.” She was taken aback. “That.” No, she really wasn’t. She wasn’t going to tell him how much it hurt inside to think about it even for a split-second. Because that would hurt him, too. “I’m fine,” she lied easily. It wasn’t that hard to put on her happy face and pretend it didn’t bother her, because at this point, she was getting used to it. She was . . . resigned to it, even. This was just how it was going to have to be.

“Because I wouldn’t blame you if you felt . . . something,” he said.

Luckily they were shrouded in darkness, because she didn’t want him to see the tears that sprang to her eyes. “What would I feel?” she asked quietly.

“I don’t know. Just upset, maybe.”

It touched her that he was basically giving her permission to be sad, mad, probably even jealous. But even though she was all those things, and even though he would have tried his best to help her through it, she didn’t want him to know about it. “It doesn’t upset me,” she said, scooting a little closer now. It really shouldn’t have upset her, not when she had a guy like him to come home to.

“But he’s your ex,” Max pointed out, “so it’s gotta be weird.”

“Well . . . maybe a little,” she acknowledged, downplaying it for his benefit. “But I’m actually really, really happy for them.” The more often she said that, the more convincing it started to sound.

“Hmm.” He pulled up the covers a bit, then pondered, “I wonder if Michael will be happy for us when we get engaged someday.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t count on it.” That was the difference between them, wasn’t it? She would conceal her true feelings about all of this until the day she died if she had to, but Michael wouldn’t hesitate to let his be known. Maybe it had everything to do with his hatred for Max, or maybe it was more about his self-control. Or rather lack of it.

“So when do you want me to ask you?” Max said suddenly.

“Ask me?” she echoed. “Ask me what?”

“To get married.”

She started having mental flashbacks to Christmas time, when she’d really started to believe that he would propose. She hadn’t been ready for it then, and she still wasn’t ready for it now. “Uh, I don’t know,” she responded unsurely. “I don’t exactly have a timeline drawn up.”

“This year?” he questioned. “Next year?”

Don’t ask me this, Max, she thought. She didn’t want to be put on the spot like this, because she didn’t know what to say. She decided it was best to just sort of sidestep the whole question altogether. “Let’s let Michael and Sarah get married first,” she suggested. “We don’t wanna steal their thunder.”

“Right,” he said, laughing a little. Much to her relief, he didn’t push it any further. She heard him yawn, and then he looked over at the bedside clock. “It’s late,” he remarked. “I better get to sleep.”

“Yeah,” she agreed. Sleep sounded perfect right about now.

“Goodnight,” he said, rolling over onto his side. For some reason, he always slept with his back to her.

“Night,” she returned quietly, glad that she’d managed to joke her way out of a serious conversation. This time, at least. But there would be a next time, and eventually there would be the real thing. Max would ask her to marry him, and he would expect her answer to be yes. And if Michael and Sarah were already man and wife at that point . . . well, then it probably would be.








TBC . . .

-April

[keepsmiling7]

Oh boy.......everything is so messed up......
Thanks,
Carolyn

[April]

Carolyn: Everything is always so messed up in my fics.


Thanks for reading!

Music suggestion today is "Never Think" by Robert Pattinson, whom I'm not actually a huge fan of, but I like this song, and I had it playing on repeat in the background while I was writing one scene, so . . . you can listen to it here when you see if you'd like: Never Think








Part 55








Valentine’s Day came and went with little fanfare. It was one of Sarah’s favorite holidays, but Michael personally couldn’t stand it. He forced himself to dislike it a little less, just because she got so into it. Every year she put on this ridiculous Cupid costume and somehow managed to make it look sexy, and right when he woke up, she’d shoot him with plastic arrows. Really, the whole thing was pretty damn amusing, but this year, he just couldn’t muster up the same enthusiasm for it.

He already had the day off class, though, so he took the day off work to spend it with her. She had class, but once that was over, she came straight home. Even though she had homework, she put it off just to spend time with him. Kissing was a big theme that afternoon, but almost as if she were drawing it out on purpose, she didn’t let it go any further than that.

He took her out to the movies that evening. Tess and Kyle were supposed to show up and do the whole double date thing, but they cancelled at last minute. Michael assumed that meant they were either staying in and having sex, or Tess felt nauseous and couldn’t leave the house. For his best friend’s sake, he hoped it was the former. Whatever the reason, he ended up watching a two hour romantic comedy with Sarah by his side, and it just happened to be one of those movies that ended in a wedding. The couple got their happily ever after, and Sarah even teared up a little.

That night, upon returning home, they kissed some more, and this time she didn’t hold back, making it obvious that she wanted to go further. She wore some new lingerie for him, and appropriately, it was red. He hesitated a little more than he usually did before taking it off of her, but eventually he gave in and did it. They had sex, and she fell asleep shortly after.

He lay awake next to her, watching her, knowing this wouldn’t be so bad. Waking up every morning next to Sarah Nguyen, falling asleep next to her every single night? Most guys would never be so lucky. She was like a one-of-a-kind girl, and for some reason, she wanted him.

For some reason.

Even though he was right there next to her, his mind was somewhere else, so he reached across her small body and picked his phone up off the nightstand. He covered the bright screen with his hand so as not to disturb her while she slept, then sent a quick text to Maria. He just had to know something.

do you hate me?

He sent it, hoping for a quick response, but he didn’t get one. In fact, half an hour passed, and she still didn’t text him back. Then another half hour, and another one. And that whole time, he lay there like an idiot, clutching his phone in his hand, barely able to stay awake but unwilling to fall asleep until he heard back.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity but in reality was only two hours, he got a response. At 2:00 a.m., she sent him back exactly what he’d been hoping for.

no

He stared at the one word on the screen, letting it resonate. Once, out of pure anger and frustration, he’d told her he hated her, and that couldn’t have been further from the truth. But just knowing that she wasn’t even going to pretend to hate him . . . it was a major relief. And that wasn’t good. Because even though he’d asked her a completely different question than he’d asked his girlfriend ten days ago, her no felt a hell of a lot better than Sarah’s yes had.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~
( )

It wasn’t easy to go to Music Appreciation on Tuesday and sit next to Michael. But Maria did it, and she did it wordlessly. It wasn’t like she could just stop going to class, or stop seeing him. Or thinking about him. No, she definitely couldn’t stop thinking about him.

He seemed to respect the fact that she didn’t want to talk, so he just sat quietly with her while the professor rambled. Midway through the lecture, though, he reached over and set something down on her lap. A tiny piece of candy, one of those hearts with the words on it. This one was yellow and said Miss You. Something about it was just as endearing as it was desperate.

She could feel his eyes on her, though she refused to look at him. She couldn’t. Something would just break inside of her, and she would start crying. So she closed her hand over the little candy heart and put it in her pocket instead.

“I got a lot more where that came from,” he promised, and for some reason, she couldn’t help but smile.

After class, he told her he had something for her, and even though she could have very easily gone home, or made up some excuse to detach herself from him, she followed him back to Vidorra, all the way up to his apartment. She almost felt as though she were trespassing when she walked through the door, because deep down, she knew she shouldn’t be there. At least not when it was just the two of them.

“So why am I here, exactly?” she asked.

“Because . . .” He set his backpack down and walked over to the refrigerator, reaching up top to grab a small box. “I bought, like, twenty boxes of these stupid things and collected all the Miss You’s. Just for you.” He reopened the box and instructed, “Hold out your hand.”

Reluctantly, she put her left palm up and let him dump all the hearts into them. There must have been two dozen of them at least, all of them varying in color but with the same two words. “I don’t even know what to say,” she murmured. As far as Valentine’s Day gifts went, it was definitely unique.

“I miss you, too?” he suggested. “Just an idea.”

She moved the tiny candy hearts around in her hand, sifting through them. One of them didn’t say Miss You. It said Love You. But surely that had just been an accident.

“You should keep these,” she told him, trying to hand them back.

“No, they’re for you,” he insisted.

She didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but at the same time . . . she just felt like she should give them back. “I’m actually not really a fan of them,” she said.

The hopeful expression in his eyes faded for a moment. “Oh.” He slid them off her hand and into his, carefully pouring them back in the small box. “More for me then.”

“For you and Sarah,” she added. Couldn’t forget about her.

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “Me and Sarah.”

Sarah . . . Guerin, Maria thought, just testing it out in her mind. That was going to take some getting used to, but she could handle it. “Okay, listen . . .” she said, trying to cut to the chase of why she was even there. The candy hearts were a nice gesture and all, but they both knew they needed to talk. “I don’t know why you felt compelled to text me at midnight last night, or why I felt compelled to respond at 2:00 a.m. But I want you to know that I meant what I said. I don’t hate you.” She looked down at the floor, mumbling, “I could never hate you.”

He hesitated for a moment, then bravely asked, “Why not?”

She shrugged helplessly, actually wishing that she could. “I just can’t. That still doesn’t mean I’m glad you reused my ring. That’s probably gonna hurt for a while. But I think . . . it’s starting to hurt a little less.” Her bottom lip trembled with emotion, and she fought to contain it. No crying today. She had to be strong. She knew exactly what she wanted to say. She’d had a week to think about it.

“You know, I keep telling people how happy I am for you and Sarah, and I’ve been trying to figure out why it’s so easy for me to say,” she told him. “And then I realized . . . maybe I am happy.” It felt weird to even consider the possibility, but . . . it could happen, couldn’t it? It didn’t just have to be a lie. “I mean, why wouldn’t I be? This is what I’ve always wanted for you. For you to go out there in the world and find someone who makes your life better without making it complicated. And I think Sarah’s that person for you.” She knew she would never be that person, no matter how much she wanted to be. She’d let him go for that very reason. “You guys are gonna be together for the rest of your lives. You’re gonna get married and start a family.” She pictured him with Dylan, and she had to smile to keep from crying. “And I know that’s what you’ve always wanted.”

He moved closer, his hand reaching out to touch hers. “Maria . . .”

She pulled her hand away, but she couldn’t find the resolve to take a step back. “And you’re gonna have it. So I am happy for you. And Sarah.” She swallowed her pride and said, “You guys are meant to be together,” ignoring that stab of pain in her heart when the words came out. “But you have to do me a favor, okay? You have to stop worrying about me so much and just think about her.” Their friendship, if it could even be called that, was just feeling a bit too intimate lately, and she didn’t want to risk anything.

“What if I can’t do that?” he asked.

She blinked back tears, determined to put that wall up between them, because it was needed. “Well, you have to.” He’d made a commitment to Sarah. Even though he hadn’t said the vows yet, he’d made it a long time ago, and she didn’t want him to question it. She didn’t want him to text her in the middle of the night, or save dozens of candy hearts for her. She didn’t want him to look at her the way he was looking at her right now, because it made it so hard to resist him.

“I have to go,” she told him, quickly backing towards the door. She ran right into it, the handle pressing against her back, right where that tattoo of his initials was. She fumbled for it, opened it, and slipped out into the hall. When she was sure he wasn’t going to come out and tell her to stay, she took the lone candy heart out of her pocket and stared down at the two words etched onto its surface. She missed him now, even though she saw him almost every single day. So that meant, when he and Sarah did get married, she would just miss him even more.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When a pair of hands covered her eyes, Liz startled for a second. But just for a second, because she recognized those hands right away.

“Boo,” she heard Max say. He uncovered her eyes.

“Hey, you,” she said, craning her neck back to look up at him, delighted to see him. “Wrong holiday.”

“I know.” He sat down beside her on the park bench and asked, “So how was your Valentine’s Day? You do anything?”

“No, just stayed in,” she replied. She’d thought about going out, but . . . what was the point? All she would have done was spent her entire evening thinking about him. “What about you?”

“Same,” he answered. “We watched a movie, drank some champagne. It was nice.”

I bet it was, Liz thought enviously. Sometimes she wondered if Maria took all her evenings with Max for granted. Had Valentine’s Day just been another ordinary night for her? Or had she actually taken a moment to realize how lucky she was?

“What’s she doing?” Max asked, motioning towards Scarlet, who was running all around the park, getting her new dress dirty.

“Chasing butterflies,” Liz informed him. “Either that or a squirrel.” She really hoped it was butterflies, though, because squirrels were filthy.

“Look at her go.” Max immediately took out his phone and called out to her to get her attention. “Hey, Scarlet!”

She looked over when she heard her name, and when he smiled and waved at her, she did the same thing. But even her daddy couldn’t distract her from the all-important butterflies, and seconds later, she was absorbed in trying to catch them again.

“She loves you,” Liz said. There was a definite sparkle in Scarlet’s eyes whenever Max was around. No one else could duplicate it.

“Hmm.” Max watched her adoringly and took a few photos on his phone. “You think she’ll play basketball someday?” he asked. “ ‘cause I’ve come to the conclusion Dylan’s not going to.”

“Really? But I thought he was getting better.” She’d seen enough games this year to know that Dylan definitely wasn’t bad; he was just . . . better at football, which Liz knew irritated Max to no end.

“He’s one of the best on the team,” Max acknowledged, “but that’s not saying much.” He sighed and put his phone away in his pocket. “I’m just glad the season’s almost over.”

“When’s your last game?” she asked.

“Tomorrow. Thank God.”

“Oh, I’m sorry it hasn’t gone better,” she sympathized. Max had really given it his all, but there was only so much he could do. “Are you gonna coach it again next year?”

“I don’t know,” Max mumbled, his eyes still on Scarlet. “Probably not if Dylan doesn’t play.” He shrugged. “We’ll see. Actually, I’m kinda hopin’ I can get him to try baseball this summer.”

“Yeah?” It wasn’t a bad idea, but it was a little . . . transparent. “But what if he just wants to play football?”

“Then that’s fine, I guess.”

Liz gave him a look. “Max.” He didn’t have to hide anything with her. If all that she could be was his friend, she was determined to be a damn good one and be the kind of person he could open up to. “Are you feeling insecure?”

“No,” he replied quickly, too quickly, before changing his tune. “Maybe. It’s just . . . every time I see him pick up a football or hear him talk about it, I remember how much time I missed out on with him. And it’s my own fault.”

“Well, at least you’re not missing out on time with Scarlet,” she pointed out. Max could have disappointed her and their daughter and everyone if he hadn’t learned from his mistakes, if he’d ignored her these past few years. But he hadn’t, not once since the day she’d been born.

“Yeah, I’m not gonna make the same mistakes with her,” he vowed, his face breaking into a smile as he continued to watch her play. “Look at her go. She’s got some speed.”

“Then she must’ve gotten that from you, because we both know she didn’t get any athleticism from me,” Liz said.

“Hopefully she got your brains, though.”

“Hopefully,” Liz agreed, laughing a little. Though truthfully, there was nothing wrong with Max’s brains. He was still one of the smartest people she knew, even if he wasn’t working a job that gave him the chance to show it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Even though he could have gone home after wrapping up his afternoon with Jake on Thursday, Michael opted to stay at the school. It was the last basketball game of the boys’ season, and even though Michael wasn’t a fan of the game . . . he wanted to go. He called Sarah and asked her to meet him up there, and she did.

It wasn’t exactly crowded—the football games had definitely drawn more fans—but for a youth basketball game, the turnout wasn’t bad. Maybe it was just because it was the last game of the season, or maybe it was because the opponent was supposedly even worse. For the kids’ sake, Michael hoped they won. But if they didn’t and Max’s coaching season resulted in a zero-win record . . . well, that would be fantastic.

“God, I hate basketball,” Michael groaned, navigating his way back from the concession stand.

“Then why are we here?” Sarah asked, following along behind him.

“Well, do we really have anything better to do?” he asked.

“Uh, yeah. Studying. Sex.”

Michael stopped for a moment and acknowledged, “Okay, true, but we can do that when we get home.”

“Which one?”

“Both.” He climbed up onto the bleachers, holding out his hand to help her up.

“Maybe we could do both at the same time,” she suggested.

He blinked, and in an instant, he flashed back to his old room, messing around in his bed with Maria while attempting to study chemistry. There had been plenty of chemistry, that was for sure. He still remembered every damn element on that periodic table, only because he remembered touching and kissing every inch of her body.

He blinked again, and the sights and sounds of the gymnasium settled back in. “I don’t think that’s possible,” he told Sarah. He made his way halfway up the bleachers and moved in towards the center so he’d have a good spot to watch the game. She sat down beside him and held out a cheese-drenched nacho chip. He shook his head to decline.

“You just wanna watch Dylan play, don’t you?” she said.

“And Luke,” he added quickly, “and the other kids from the football team.”

“But mostly Dylan,” she said knowingly. “It’s okay, you know. I know you still care about him.”

He’s not the only one I still care about, Michael thought, feeling as if his eyes were drawn to the left side of the gym as Maria came in. Even just wearing jeans and a beige sweater, she looked like a million bucks. “There’s Maria,” he said, just so it wouldn’t look like he was staring.

Sarah glanced over to and then quickly set her nachos aside. “I’m gonna go talk to her,” she announced, springing to her feet. She scampered down the bleachers, and Michael actually felt a little more relaxed when she was gone. Because then he could stare as much as he wanted to.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Maria knew she was cutting it close. The boys were already warming up, and there were only seven minutes left on the play clock until the game started. The truth was, it had been an effort to show up there. Dylan wasn’t excited about playing, Max wasn’t excited about coaching, and she wasn’t all that excited about watching. Hopefully they could just skip basketball season next year.

She scanned the gym, looking for someone she knew to sit by. She didn’t have to look long, though, because Sarah came bounding her way like an excited puppy dog.

“Maria, hey.”

What’s she doing here? Maria wondered. If she was there, then Michael had to be, because there was no way Sarah would just come alone. “Hey,” she returned, trying to smile, trying to not look down at that ring. “Didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Yeah, Michael and I came to watch the last game,” Sarah chirped.

“Oh, well, brace yourself. They haven’t won once.”

Ever the optimist, Sarah declared, “Then that’s bound to change today.”

“Let’s hope so,” Maria said, crossing her fingers. Max was going to be majorly bummed out if the whole season was a bust. After the way the football season had ended, he’d been thinking they might be able to win a whole slew of games.

“Hey, so do you wanna sit by us?” Sarah offered. She turned around and pointed out where Michael was at on the bleachers. “Plenty of room.”

There was plenty of room, but Maria knew from experience that if she sat down next to him, it would feel very close. Still, she couldn’t very well turn down the offer without looking . . . suspicious. “Sure,” she said, figuring she could just suck it up. As long as he and Sarah weren’t all lovey-dovey, she could handle it.

“Great!” Sarah exclaimed. “Do you mind if we . . .” She motioned over her shoulder to the exit that led out towards the concession stand. “Can we go out there for a minute first, though?”

Instantly, Maria felt worried. “Yeah, that’s fine,” she said, trying to at least sound calm, though. But inside, she wondered if Sarah knew something. Like maybe something about that ring? Had Michael told her the truth about it?

Maria followed Sarah out of the gym, glancing up at Michael on her way out. He looked at her curiously, like he wondered where they were going, like he wanted to follow but wouldn’t.

Since it was noisy near the concession stand, Maria and Sarah ducked into one of the hallways instead. It had to be the third grade one, because these lockers were larger and had actual locks on them. The kids Dylan’s age had smaller lockers that didn’t really lock.

“Hey, so listen . . . I just wanna apologize,” Sarah started in.

Of all the things Maria had been expecting she might hear come out of Sarah’s mouth, that hadn’t been one of them. “For what?” she asked. What could the world’s most perfect girl have possibly done wrong?

“For the way I broke the news to you about the engagement,” Sarah clarified. “I was really insensitive.”

Maria had tried to block out that whole moment in time, but honestly, it had nothing to do with Sarah. The girl deserved to be happy. Elated, even. What girl wouldn’t be in that situation? “No, you were fine,” Maria assured her. “I don’t—I don’t have feelings for Michael anymore, so . . .”

“No, I know, but still . . . you guys have a history,” Sarah said, “and I should have been more respectful of that.”

“Well, you’re right, we do have a history,” Maria admitted. “But that’s the past, and you’re his future, clearly.” It was a bitter pill to swallow, but there was nothing she could do about it. And in a way, there was nothing she even wanted to do about it, because Michael’s future with Sarah seemed to be very, very bright. “Don’t worry about it, okay? You deserve to be on cloud nine right now. Don’t feel like you have to tone things down on my behalf.”

“Are you sure?” Sarah kept fretting.

“Yes.”

“So we’re good?”

“We’re good.” She remembered how negatively people had reacted to her and Michael’s engagement, how skeptical and downright rude they’d been. She didn’t want Sarah to have to deal with anything so hostile.

“Oh, thank God,” Sarah breathed out. “I’m really glad to hear that.”

Maria smiled. Good, she thought. A girl deserved to feel glad about getting engaged. It wasn’t the kind of thing that should come with any negativity attached.

“So, um, with that in mind then,” Sarah said, “I want to officially invite you to the wedding.”

“Oh, yeah?” Maria kept smiling, but inside, her heart broke a little more. “And when is that gonna be?”

“Well, nothing’s set in stone yet, but we were looking at early August,” Sarah responded. Her whole face was lighting up now, and that glow returned. The glow of being a girl in love. “That way we can squeeze in a honeymoon before the start of senior year.”

“Right,” Maria said, trying not to dwell too much on the word honeymoon. “That, um . . . that doesn’t really give you a whole lot of time to plan it, though.” Or a lot of time for me to adjust to it, she thought. In her mind, she’d just assumed that it would happen a year from now or something, and by then, she’d be more at peace with it.

“I could do it, I think,” Sarah said confidently. “I’ve already got a lot of ideas.”

“I’m sure you do,” Maria said. For some reason, Sarah struck her as the type of girl who had started putting together a whole binder full of ideas back when she’d been a kid. “Knowing Michael, though, he probably doesn’t care about anything but the food.”

“Yeah, that’s his main priority,” Sarah confirmed, chuckling. “And of course mine’s, like, my dress, and my bridesmaids’ dresses. I don’t want them to look tacky.”

“Yeah.” The mention of bridesmaids made Maria nervous, because she really didn’t want to be thrust into that role. “So Tess is gonna be your maid of honor, I assume,” she said, hoping that there were a whole slew of other girls who would take part in the ceremony.

“Yep, and Kyle’s obviously gonna be the best man,” Sarah said. “Actually . . .”

Oh, shit, Maria thought. Here it comes.

“Okay, feel free to say no, but I kinda thought . . .”

She felt the question coming on and knew she was powerless to stop it.

“Well, it might be kind of nice if Dylan was the ring-bearer,” Sarah said. “I mean, Michael just adores him.”

Dylan, Maria registered. Ring-bearer? It was a step down from the bridesmaid question, which was a bit of a relief, but still . . . it was a big commitment.

“Uh, yeah, that would be . . .” Just go with it, she told herself. If she made a big deal out of it, it would just be worse. “That’d be good. He could do that.”

“Really? Because if you don’t want him to . . .”

“No, um . . . it’s fine.” Sarah was right; Michael did adore Dylan. Having him there, having him be a part of that day . . . it might be poignant. “I mean, I’ll run it by Max, but it should be fine.”

“Oh my god, thank you, Maria,” Sarah said in a rush. “You have no idea how much that’s gonna mean to him.”

No, I do, Maria thought, smiling shakily. She’d watched Michael and Dylan’s bond develop from day one. She knew exactly how much it would mean to him, because it still meant that much to her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ambient music was practically enough to put Maria asleep. She liked it, but it was so relaxing, almost too relaxing. She sat in Music Appreciation the next day, waiting for the class to start, her iPod earbuds blocking out all other sounds. She was desperately trying to get herself into a calm headspace so that her interactions with Michael today could just be . . . nice. Not an emotional roller coaster.

Unfortunately, her plans were shot when he yanked the earbuds out of her ears. “Are you fuckin’ kidding me?” he grumbled, bending down behind her seat so that his breath was right there on her ear.

“What?” What could she have possibly done to piss him off just by sitting there?

“Dylan’s gonna be in my wedding now?” he spat incredulously.

Oh, great, she thought. So apparently he and Sarah had talked about this after that abysmal game last night, and he clearly wasn’t taking it well. “Possibly,” she said. “Is that a problem for you?”

“Yeah.”

“Seriously?” She’d been expecting . . . gratitude, maybe? Some kind of thanks over the fact that she was willing to let her son be a part of the most important day of his life. “Why?”

His grip tightened on the back of her chair. “Because he was supposed to be the ring-bearer in our wedding, Maria.”

She grunted. “Yeah, well, that was supposed to be the ring on my finger, but . . .” She trailed off, knowing there was no need to get into all that again.

He remained bent down close to her, so close, close enough that she could feel the heat radiating off of his body. The professor came into the classroom, and everyone else started to take their seats, but not Michael. “Let’s get the hell out of here,” he suggested, sounding like he wouldn’t take no for an answer.

Common sense told her to stay—she’d missed way too much class lately. But her gut just wanted to follow him.

Against her better judgment, she left the classroom with him right as their professor was beginning to teach. He was silent and tense as they walked outside, and it took her a while to say anything, too. “You know, I think your GPA’s gonna take a hit this semester,” she predicted.

“I don’t care,” he mumbled.

“You don’t?”

“No. There’s more important stuff goin’ on.”

She moved ahead of him and shook her head, angry at him for being so angry. “Okay, look, don’t be mad at Sarah, okay? She was just trying to do something nice for you.”

“I’m not mad at her,” he informed her. “I’m mad at you.”

She whirled around, completely confused. “What? Me?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“Because you didn’t even stop and think that maybe I didn’t want Dylan involved.” He pointed an accusatory finger at her and growled, “You should’ve known.”

She huffed, throwing her arms up in the air. “Okay, so tell Sarah that.” This was something for them to work out, and whatever decision they came to, whether it was Dylan being in the wedding or not, she’d be fine with it.

“What am I supposed to say?” he bellowed.

“Exactly what you just said to me!”

“And when she asks me why? Then what am I supposed to say, huh?”

“The truth.”

“The truth?” he echoed loudly. “The truth is, whenever I look at him, I still see my son, Maria. How am I supposed to tell that to my girlfriend?”

Hearing him say that . . . it was as painful as it was touching. It felt like he’d just put his hand around her heart and squeezed. Deep down, she’d always known that Michael would think of Dylan as a son, and likewise, Dylan would probably always think of Michael as his dad. Or at least one of them. But knowing it and hearing it were two different things.

He sat down on the steps outside Lecuona Hall, looking completely defeated and nowhere near as happy as Sarah had been at the game last night. Even though she would have liked to be stern and maybe even standoffish with him, Maria couldn’t help but feel bad. She understood now with perfect clarity why he didn’t want Dylan involved in his wedding, and she probably should have understood it sooner.

“I’ll come up with an excuse then,” she told him, sitting down beside him, “to get him out of it.”

“Yeah, well, don’t be surprised if she ends up asking you to be a bridesmaid,” he muttered.

“What?” She thought she’d dodged that bullet yesterday.

“She’s got a list. Your name’s on it.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah. ‘cause we’re all such good friends.” He laughed bitterly, angrily, and part of her wondered if he was maybe even a little mad at Sarah, like maybe he hoped she would understand that he didn’t want either her or Dylan involved. He’d never admit it even if he was, but . . . was it wrong for her to hope that that was the case?

“I’m always complicating things for you,” she said, shaking her head sadly.

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

“It is,” she insisted. “Look at you. You’re a mess.”

Momentarily, he smirked. “A hot mess.”

He could joke about it if that made him feel better, but to her, it was a serious thing. It had been years—years—since they’d been together. With all that time having passed, this shouldn’t have been so difficult. Any of it. The ring and the ring-bearer and the bridesmaids . . . it should have just been easy. It should have been exciting for him and not so devastating for her, but so far, all it had been was dramatic. And Sarah was so blissfully unaware.

“So do you really still think of Dylan as your son?” Maria asked, figuring she’d give him the opportunity to backtrack, maybe just lie and claim that he’d been exaggerating. But instead, he owned up to it.

“I always will, Maria,” he mumbled, hanging his head.

Then she couldn’t help but wonder . . . if he would always feel like Dylan’s dad, what kind of other things would he always feel?








TBC . . .

-April