Soft Deceitful Wiles - (M/L, 1/1, Adult) 2/10/07 COMPLETE

[CME]

Title: Soft Deceitful Wiles
Category: M/L, short story.
Rating: Adult
Disclaimer: I do not own Roswell or it’s characters. Lines interspersed throughout the story are from Cry Your Name and It’s Too Late It’s Too Bad. The title came from William Blake’s poem, Poison Tree.
Author's note: I was trying to write a Valentine's Day story and this is what came out.
Summary: Liz had just buried her best friend, Alex who died from a 'tragic car accident.' None of her friends believe her when she confronts them about the cause of his death and so she's forced face the mystery of his death alone. What happens when the one person whose betrayal hurt her the most confronts her in the desert?


<center>Soft Deceitful Wiles</center>

She sits on the fence, her bags packed and sitting at her feet. She squints her eyes and stares at the empty desert highway wondering what was taking so long. She’s tired and spent, having hitched a ride all the way out to this vast stretch of road. It was the only way she could do it without rousing the suspicions of her parents…and the others. She fiddles with the bills that are stashed in her shirt pocket, having withdrawn most of her life savings out of the bank. She knew that she was going to need money. After all, it was a long way from Roswell to Sweden.

Normally a very patient girl, she’s suddenly feeling very anxious. She’s trying hard to control her feelings and organize her thoughts. There was a lot that she needed to do. She tried to breathe slowly, hoping to calm herself but it just wasn’t working. She was too furious. As hard as she tried to control herself, her anger was threatening to swallow her whole.

“Would you listen to yourself? Who could possibly want to murder Alex?”

Her breathing becomes hard as if she’s breathing fire. Her nerves are frayed and her thoughts are jumbled. She jumps off the fence and begins to pace.

“ It was a traffic accident. There's nothing otherworldly about that.”

Her eyes are focused on the ground. She fears that if she looks anywhere else that the dam that’s holding back her tears will break and that just couldn’t happen. Crying wouldn’t do her any good.

“ You don't know what the hell you're talking about! You don't know anything about Kivar, or our world.”

She’s so angry that she feels like screaming. Angry at Alex for dying. Angry at Max for not believing her. But most of all she’s angry at herself. Angry for hoping. Angry for falling in love. She has so much rage that it’s threatening to choke her and she feels her chest constrict from the force of it all.

In the distance she hears the purring of an engine. It’s getting louder and she knows that it’s approaching. She turns and stares down the road. The sun is beginning to wane and the light from the dusky sky makes it difficult to see.

She’s not afraid. Even though she’s alone in the middle of an empty desert road there is no fear in her.

She inches closer to the road, extends her arm and sticks out her thumb. Waiting.

When the car is finally close enough to identify, her face hardens and she drops her arm. She doesn’t need this right now. Her chest fills with indignation and she turns her back and stalks back to her bags. She’s ready to defend herself. Ready to do whatever it took to make him go away.

She hears the engine roar slow to a dull purr before its shut off. Even before she turns around, she knows he’s there. She can feel his presence.

And she knows he’s angry, just like her.

But she doesn’t care.

“Liz, where are you going?” He asks, staring at her bags.

“Sweden,” she answers succinctly.

“Are you kidding me? Get in the car,” he demands.

“No.” How dare he order her! Who did he think he was? She crosses her arms and glares at him.

She sees his nostrils flare and a small part of her feels satisfied that she’s managed to piss him off.

He steps around her, grabs one of her bags and tosses it into the jeep. “Liz, get in my car.”

She squints and grinds her teeth at his audacity. She snatches her bag back. “What are you gonna do, huh? You’re gonna throw me in it?”

He looks at her for a moment and she can see that he’s angry. She feels a small sense of pride for standing up to him.

“You have to listen to me,” he says.

Liz shakes her head and her eyes widen in disbelief. “Don't even pull that king card on me, Max. I'm not Isabel. You can't boss me around.”

He takes a step back, offended at her words. She knew that he would never have expected those words from her. She’d never before stood up to him. Inwardly she smiles at her small triumph and lets her anger boost her confidence.

“If this is about us. That’s fine, Liz. But can’t you see what you’re doing? You’re putting everyone’s lives in danger. Isabel, Michael, Maria, and Tess. What you’re planning to do is not only stupid. It’s dangerous.”

Liz throws her hands up in the air. She can’t believe that’s what he thinks of this. “My God, Max! Can you not think of yourself for one minute? This isn’t about us. It’s about everyone else.”

She marches up to him, glaring at him the whole time. “What I’m trying to do is not stupid. I’m trying to save everyone’s lives.”

Max turns and sputters. “How can you think this is going to save them, huh? I told you Alex’s death has nothing to do with us. He was depressed. He committed suicide.”

Her lips quiver and she feels hot tears of anger course down her cheeks. She reaches out and pushes at Max’s shoulder causing him turn and face her. “Fuck you, Max! How can you call yourself Alex’s friend? If you truly knew Alex you would know that he would never do that. Alex would never kill himself.”

Max shakes his head and yet she can tell that he’s affected by her words. “Liz,” he says softly. “Sheriff Valenti investigated and you heard yourself what they found.”

“No, no,” she shook her head and backed away. How can he not know that what he’s saying is like daggers to her heart? “He would never…”

“Liz,” Max steps forward to reach out to her but she shrugs off his touch. She turns and heads back to the fence.

“Fine,” she hears him say. “If you won’t listen to reason, I’ll just have to do it for you.”

He brushes past her and grabs her other bag that’s on the ground. She whirls around just in time for her to see him throw it into the car and make a grab for her other bag. Before he can even reach it, however, she deftly gets in his way and snatches it back, holding it close to her body.

“Go away, Max. Leave me alone. Go be a leader to the others. I don’t need you.”

She can tell that her words have hurt him but he does well to mask his emotions. He suddenly reaches out and tugs the bag away from her but she’s not letting go.

“Let go, Liz,” he says gritting his teeth. “Let go of the bag and get in the car.”

“No,” she says, her voice full of resentment.

“Get in the car.”

“No!”

“Just let it go.”

“No!”

Max tugs on the bag and she’s caught off balance and falls on the ground. She let’s out a surprise grunt as she hits the dusty desert floor.

“Liz!” Max exclaims and she feels him grab her arm to pick her up.

“Leave me alone!” She yells, jerking her arm away. She angrily swipes at her face but is helpless to stop the tears. They’re falling fast and furious as she wallows on the ground.

She’s so livid that she feels like her skin is going to burst from the rage. Her soul, her guts, her anguish are going to burst and spill out of her, staining the ground red. As red as the fury she feels that’s clawing at her core.

She hears him call her name but she ignores it. Once again she feels his hand on her shoulder but this time it enrages her and she surges on her feet.

“Why can’t you just ever listen, Max? Why is it you always have to be in control of everyone, huh? Is it too hard to accept that I could be right?” She advances forward and invades his space causing him to stumble back. His back hits the cold metal of the jeep but she continues pushing wanting to make him feel the hurt and the pain that she feels.

“Just go back. Go be with Tess,” she says tearfully. She doesn’t realize it but her pushes have turned into punches and she continues to strike him. She feels a small sense of satisfaction when she sees him wince from her blows.

“Stop it, Liz!” Max yells and grabs at her flailing arms, trying to stop her attack.

For a second she’s stunned at his strength as she continues to struggle against him. Her eyes lock with his and before she knows it she’s lunging forward and pressing her lips against his. She kisses him hard and she feels his body stiffen from the contact but he quickly responds to her actions and he lets her arms go. His hands move to cup the nape of her neck and he returns her kiss, his fingers sifting through her long hair.

She pushes back at him, throwing all the anger and passion she feels in the kiss. She deepens it, sliding her tongue against his and biting his lip. She can taste the saltiness of her tears and the slight tang of blood.

She struggles against him to free her arms that are trapped between their bodies. Their feet scuffle along the ground kicking up mini-storms of dust. Max reverses their positions and she feels her back hit the metal of the jeep, hard.

And suddenly, she’s clawing at him, digging her nails into his shoulders and back. She doesn’t understand what she’s doing but she’s helpless to stop herself. She wants more. She feels that if he stops, she would die.

She doesn’t know how it happened but she soon found herself inside the jeep with Max beneath her, their hands roaming each others bodies, touching each other’s skin. She pushes at Max’s shirt, quickly pulling it over his head. Her kisses move lower, down his neck onto his chest. She kisses him, she bites him, she laves his skin with her tongue. He returns the favour when he whips off her shirt and pushes her bra aside to get at her breasts. Her skin feels like it’s on fire and she moans.

The cold night air hits her skin and she realizes that she’s naked…and so is he. They exchange no words but merely continue to taste each other’s skin. He sits up and a second later she’s beneath him as he showers kisses all over her breasts. She feels his torso scrape against her nipples sending delicious tendrils of pleasure throughout her body.

In the deepest recesses of her mind she knows that what she’s doing is wrong and that she should stop but her body is screaming for release. Release from the sorrow, release from the pain. And when he enters her they both scream from the pleasure and the pain.

She bites down on the skin at his shoulder as he begins to move. Her vision blurring from the tears. Her hands rub up and down his body and her legs wrap around his waist. She wants to draw him in. She wants to swallow him whole.

The ache in her heart is still there – beating, screaming, yearning. Slowly, the physical pain subsides and is replaced by desire, unbidden and raw.

He continues to move against her, creating delicious slides of friction. Her eyes close in pleasure and she keeps time by their breaths.

One two. In out.

The coil within her stretches threatening to give. She pushes up and flips him over, taking control of their dance. She kisses him, wanting his taste on her lips.

Her movements become erratic. They struggle and once again she find herself on her back as his thrusts become faster and she knows that he’s close. She closes her eyes and digs her nails into his back as the coil within her snaps. Not a moment later, she feels him stiffen and moan her name.


When she wakes up, she feels something heavy holding her down. She opens her eyes and she sees that she’s inside a car. An old worn-out jeep. Like a freight train, all the events that have transpired in the past few hours come crashing back. She turns her head and sees the man that she loves sleeping peacefully beside her and she has to choke back a gasp. She closes her eyes in shame as a lone tear slides down her cheek.

Slowly and carefully, she slips from beneath his hold, gathering the remains of her clothing. She watches him as she gets dressed, her previous feelings of anger and hatred replaced by confusion and indignity. What had she done?

With shaking legs she steps out of the car, quietly closing the door behind her. She sees her bags strewn on the dirty ground and she picks them up one by one.

The desert is cold and the early morning light hasn’t quite pierced the horizon. The fear that she hadn’t felt last night was making its presence known. Doubt was plaguing her thoughts.

She sniffs back her tears as she begins to walk away, ignoring the soreness and pain. She takes a deep breath holding back the guilt that’s threatening to eat her whole. She knows that he’ll wake up confused, unsure of what had transpired. But she couldn’t stay. She had a job to do.

She knows that things between them weren’t over. That it would never be over. They would continue to love and hurt each other and there was nothing that would ever prevent that. Not even the end of the world.

And so, she had to walk away. She had to continue. For Alex. For Max. For the others. For herself. She had to seek the answers.

As she put one foot in front of the other, she prayed, preparing herself for the long, lonely journey ahead.

A journey she had to face…alone.