3Title: Seeking Surrender
Diclaimer: I do not own Roswell
Summary: What if the aliens new exactly where they came from? How hard can it actually be to break tradition and follow your heart? A littke angst, a lot of soulmate stuff. Alt POVs.
Rating: Adult
They tell me this got deleted, so I thought I'd repost if anyone is still interested... oh, and I make a lot of changes whilst I'm posting so apologies if there are little differences.
Seeking Surrender
Prologue
Max
Buzzing.
A vivid splash of colour and noise clouds my peripheral vision as I walk the busy hall toward my locker. Like flies, students of West Roswell High buzz around me.
“Max!” someone yells. “Hey. Max!”
Not in the mood, I ignore the insistent chatter of my name, and then come to a stop in front of my locker, laboriously fiddling with the combination.
3. 2. 9. No, 3. 9. 2. Or was it 2. 9. 3. What the fuck was it?
Did Isabel change it again, or has it been this long since I’ve actually been to class?
9, 3…
I stop.
A soft pinprick in my back. It starts in between my shoulder blades and then quickly envelopes my chest like porcupine spines on my skin. I turn even before her best friend's - always an octave too high - voice penetrates my ears.
“Mom wants to throw this party thing for me at the Crashdown. I mean come on… I know this is her way of celebrating, but she’s going to invite my grandma, grandpa and my two year old cousins Archie and Reginald.”
“Reginald…?”
Liz Parker is my bio partner. We’ve barely ever said two words to each other. Her face is buried in revision cards and her hair shines a rich chocolate brown against paler skin as she nods absent-mindedly at Maria.
“My aunt married an English guy. Anyway, so I told my mom I wanted to do something at the soap factory but she wont listen.”
“Can’t you talk to her again?” Liz asks.
I watch as she bites her lip and pushes a silky strand of hair behind her ear. I don’t know why she does that. It never ever stays there anyway. Almost like on cue, her hair falls into perfect alignment from where it started.
“I dunno. I mean what is she thinking?!” Maria shrieks, “Am I meant to invite Rory McQueen to have tea with Grandpa? I’m 17 years old and she just won’t listen. I can’t wait till I move out of that place. The only reason I’m still there is because I kind of need the Jetta. …” her voice trails off when she spots me.
She elbows Liz and whispers something. Liz breaks away from her notes and looks straight up at me. Maria is trying to cover a smirk. Liz is turning a steady red. Out of nowhere, that strange, unnamed prickling in my chest gets stronger.
I turn back to my locker.
Human girls are a little strange.
*****
Liz
“So, I’m thinking blueberry cake. It’s cute and it’s different and it opens up the nasal airways. Liz. hey!”
Maria snaps her fingers in front of my face and I jump, “Oh,” I turn back to her, “blueberry sounds good.”
Maria scowls and leans close to me threateningly. “Okay, listen up Parker. You have one of two choices. You either pay me your utter and absolute attention or you go talk to him.”
“Talk to who?”
Maria does her exaggerated eye roll thing and I have to brace myself from giggling. Maria’s facial expression can get highly amusing. In fact sometimes when we’re bored and customerless at the Crashdown, I get her to make funny faces just so I can rate them. I even gave her a 9 out of 10 once.
“Him. Who is the centre of your mooning,” Maria points aggressively to her right. “Him who is secret and mysterious, yet ever absent lab partner. Him. With the biceps.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I say unconvincingly.
Maria puts up her hands in surrender and closes her locker door shut, “I give up. This is just beyond me. It’s pathetic.”
I sigh. “Yes, its pathetic, it’s utterly and completely pathetic. But I’m Liz and he’s well…” I bite my lip, throwing Max’s back a look of yearning.
“Well?”
“He’s Max, “I pull out my biology book.
“Oh! Right! I completely get in now!” Maria says sarcastically.
I shake my head in laughter, but my stomach lets out a growl and a sudden wave of dizziness engulfs my body. I have to hold onto my locker door for support.
“Liz, you ok?” Maria looks at me worriedly, stroking my shoulder.
“Just a little tired.” I admit
“You’ve been studying too hard again.”
“Yeah.”
I had thought that too.
****
Max
I frown as I notice a five day old banana in my locker. I wave my hand and it turns into pine air freshener.
There’s more whispering and shuffling. I look to my left, but someone slams their hand on the locker blocking my view.
“Where were you yesterday?”
Here we go.
“Hello to you too, Michael.” I say pleasantly.
“They waited, Max. We all waited. Where were you?”
“Around.”
Without warning Michael moves forward and brushes his hand against my temple.
“Hey, fuck off!” I push his hand away but it’s too late.
“You were at the pier?” You missed it on purpose!!?
Calm down man, you’ll give yourself an ulcer.
The connection normally stays a few minutes after Michael’s tried classically mind raping me.
Being his cousin fucking sucks.
What the hell were you doing there- why? he moves forward again
Keep.your.fucking.hands.off.me.
Michael takes a step back, looking surprised by my tone.
I shake my head suddenly feeling a tiny twinge of guilt. But he needs to keep the hell out my personal bubble.
Personal bubble? Jesus Maxwell, your spending way too much time with that new age chick. You knew the gathering yesterday was important—
I block it for a few seconds, until the connection's to weak for him to keep bitching at me with his mind. So he starts to bring it with his mouth.
Relentless.
“James must have covered for you more than 5 times for now… it’s your responsibility….no, your duty—“
“---Ooooh! And I bought the cutest little outfit!!”
Michael blinks and looks behind him at the sudden interruption, and then turns back to me.
“It’s your duty to fulfill what is requested of you, Max. Don’t you get what an honor it is?”
If I hear the word “honor” one more time I’m going to blast someone. Ninety five percent chance it will be Michael.
“They want you to take the lead. You are the youngest they’ve ever had. And I’ll be there to help you every sec of the way, man.” Michael says, like it’s his greatest and utmost goal in life to be my secretary.
“Thanks man.” I say appreciatively just to shut him up.
“No problem. It’s SUCH an honor.”
I grit my teeth as I close my locker“Why don’t you take over?”
“Me?”
For a second I think he’s gunna piss his pants with the excitement of becoming chair at the ruling council. Or as I like to call it – the council of dickheads whose money far outweighs any talent that they might have for ruling our kind.
“Yeah,” I nod. “You’d be good at it.”
Michael thinks to himself and then shakes his head. “You’re next in line Max… it’s your direct blood-line, the only memory you have –“
“Oh, Liz. I have to tell YOU SOMETHING ELSE!! Whitman told me yest--”
“Hey will you shut up a second? I’m talking!! Michael yells angrily behind him, “Yeah. So I don’t wanna- what?
I shake my head, not wanting to give Michael a lesson on manners; I pull my back pack on my shoulder.
“Let’s get to class. I get a feeling that Seligman’s got a hell of a quiz planned for us.”
“One sec,” Michael makes a grab for something in his locker and my peripheral notices a sudden movement. There’s a loud scream that reverberates across the hallway and Michael's turning, but I’m already shoving past him.
In a reflex like action, I catch her limp body before she hits the ground. Her weight brings me to my knees, and my kneecaps hit the floor with an audibly sickening crunch. But before my body recognises the hot pain scorching up my leg, blinding flashes ricochet through my body and knock the wind out my lungs.
The intensity is paralyzing. For seconds I can’t breathe.
An intake of breath brings me back to my senses and I look up at the ring of murmuring faces around me. “Oh god!” Maria’s covering her mouth and dread washes over me in nauseating waves.
I look down at the frail girl in my arms. I’ve never touched Liz Parker before….but Christ, I wasn’t expecting this….
“Maxwell?” Michael says shoving people out of the way.
I blink and try and swallow the sickening feeling congregating into a sticky lump in my throat.
Liz is dying.
----------
Back with next part....
Seeking Surrender (M/L, chapter 6, 11/24)
Moderators: Anniepoo98, ISLANDGIRL5, truelovepooh, Forum Moderators
Seeking Surrender (M/L, chapter 6, 11/24)
Last edited by Blue*Soul on Mon Nov 24, 2008 2:59 pm, edited 6 times in total.
Re: Seeking Surrender (M/L, chapter 1, 08/30)
Seeking Surrender
Chapter 1
- Max-
I close my eyes amidst a cloud of cigarette smoke, allowing it to conquer my senses. Inhaling deeply, breathing it into my soul like somehow it will become a part of me and cleanse some of the stuff I would be better off forgetting.
I stand motionlessly in a darkened area at the back of the bleachers. A gravelly pathway curves into a hole in the wood where you can crawl through, and then there’s this cement wall about 15 inches from your face. Almost like a grave.
Bangers Paradise they call it.
You don’t have to be too creative to work out why they call it that ….and its nothing to do with sausages.
But right now it’s quiet. It’s where I need to be.
Stubbing out the cigarette in my hand, I roll up my jeans and bend my left leg against the wall, ignoring the protest of pain that sparks up my thigh. If I was an artist I’d probably be fascinated at the darkened intermingling of yellow and purple splashes across my swollen knee, but instead an odd thought goes through my mind.
I never did any of the biology assignments. She did them all, without an utter word of protest. I never even wondered why.
I stare at the bruise on my knee in contemplation.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
She’s dying. So what? People die all the time. There’s fucking massacre going on all over the world. She’s a girl. Just a girl. A human girl
Christ, I can’t even say…think her name.
Liz.
Her name is Liz.
Liz.
I squeeze my eyes as images assault my mind. Her tiny body in my arms, the poison in her blood, the aggressive tumour breeding in her organs. Then there’s that prickling. It never goes away. It’s like the time Isabel forced me to go to some weird-ass relaxation thing of hers. Little did I know they were going to poke the crap out of me with the sharpest needles I’d ever seen.
I concentrate on blocking it out. It resides, but I can still feel it in the depths of my mind – waiting to burst through my skin and engulf me.
I put my hand over my knee and touch the swelling. My hand glows warm, but then I stop. I don’t like to heal. And I haven’t. Not since a long, long time. My hand drops to my side.
Pain makes you feel more alive anyway.
I notice Isabel on the bleacher as I limp out of Bangers. She’s hard to miss. Bright pink top, leaning on her elbows, breasts thrust to the heavens as she lazily soaks up the sun. Michael is sitting one bleacher above her. Looking agitated. Nothing new then.
“Oh, look, it’s the bride,” Isabel motions behind me.
I turn around as I take the bottom bleacher. My eyes follow Tess as she disappears with some jock lagging behind her into Bangers. I feel nothing.
“She definitely has an appetite for those human boys.”
“Looks who’s talking,” Michael says pointedly.
Isabel shrugs, “It’s not like you can get someone from our kind to lick your slippers clean and then completely forget that they ever did it.”
Michael pauses and then turns to me in disdain, “your sister is sick,” he says it like whatever comes out of Isabel’s mouth is my fault.
“Come on, Michael. It’s not worse than what you’ve made some girls do,” Isabel narrows her eyes accusingly, “plus, I was joking. I haven’t actually made someone do that… yet”
Michael doesn’t seem to have anything else to say, so he snorts.
Isabel rolls her eyes and turns to me. “So. What happened this morning?”
I look at her. Nothing ever gets past Isabel and her allotted female clones who roam the halls of Roswell High in search of gossip. It’s like a necessity for their ever glacial survival or something.
“That Parker girl passed out,” Michael answers for me and then shakes his head as if to say “ humans”.
“Wasn’t she your bio partner, Max?” Isabel says looking at her nails. I can’t tell if she cares, or if she’s probing for something.
“She’s dying,” I say emotionlessly.
Michael and Isabel both turn to look at me.
“I saw it when I caught her. It’s aggressive. It’s already taken over most of her body.”
I don’t mention the intensity of the flash. Or the way my whole body has started to feel like there’s someone needling the fuck out of it.
“Wow,” Isabel says after a few seconds of contemplation, “poor girl. She was really sweet.”
“Smart as fuck,” Michael adds as a loving afterthought.
I say nothing. My fingers feel numb. My knee is throbbing crazily. The residue from the flashes is still making my body hum.
Michael stands up suddenly. “What are we doing for lunch?”
Isabel sits up, “There’s this joint opened up near the desert. We should try it.”
“Are you okay to drive?” Michael asks me.
“No, you drive. I don’t think my knee can take it.” I throw Michael my keys and get up shakily from the bench.
Isabel’s eyeing me.
“You can heal it you know,” she says when Michael walks off in front, “I mean it’s your own knee so it won’t you know…backfire.”
She looks a little hesitant; she knows I don’t like people talking about that night, even in passing reference.
I shrug, “I know.”
Isabel wordlessly puts her hand on my shoulder. I know it’s her way of offering support for my knee or maybe because she knows that I’ve had better days. But I shrug her hand off as we follow Michael to the jeep.
*****
-Maria-
I hate hospitals. I hate the sterile smile. I hate when parents cry. And I hate the fact that everything’s spinning like the time I sat under the maple tree in Windmere Park after having a fight with Mom, and drank straight from her whisky flask.
I’m hoping that it will stop spinning in a bit, but for that to happen, Nancy will have to stop sobbing on Moms shoulder and I’ll have to rewind that last twenty minutes. Because right now I’m only thinking two thoughts and they’re making things really spin out of control.
1. Liz is dying.
2. What the hell am I going to do without Liz?
Kind of selfish, right?
But Liz is… well, she’s my soul sister. She taught me how to colour inside the lines in my first ‘My Little Pony’ colouring book, she held me all night when my dad left, and she gave me my first tampon when I got my period. She’s there when I cry about boys, or when I temporarily leave home because being there just sucks way too much.
So there’s no room in my life for Liz to leave, or there will be too much room when she leaves. Or something…
“Maria sweetie, where are you going?” Mom asks, rubbing her hand up and down Nancy’s back like she’s a baby needing to be burped. I suddenly realise that I’ve gotten up from my seat and am absent-mindedly walking towards Liz’s ward room.
“I was going to check –“
“--she probably needs some time with her father,” Mom says.
“Oh,” I sit back down on the plastic chair and stare ahead blankly.
“Its okay, Maria. Go in,” Jeff appears at the door looking dishevelled, “she’s asking for you.”
I take a deep breath and push open the white ward door as I walk into Liz’s room.
She’s staring at her hands and looks up at me as I walk in.
“Hey,” she’s smiling. I can see tiredness, but she has this ethereal glow about her. Like maybe she’s already died and come back as an angel.
I feel a lump rise to my throat as I sit down on the foot of her bed and stare at her. God she’s so beautiful.
“You okay?” She asks.
I stare. Why is she asking if I’m okay? Hell, this is so darned ironic. I think I’m going to laugh.
Wait.Am I okay?
“Maria?” Liz prompts.
I lick my dry lips, “ I was going to ask Mom again about the soap factory next week, but she’s a little busy now. But listen, I’ve been thinking really hard about the cake. You know blueberry will really clash with my green outfit….”
Liz’s eyes widen in confusion but I continue to talk anyway.
“…. so that’s a big no, no. I was also thinking that maybe we’d have plain cake instead of blueberry. I know you would prefer that –though, it’s not only because you would prefer it, I just have a really anal family…”
….What the hell am I talking about?!
“In fact I was thinking that maybe we could have two cakes.”
“Maria…,” Liz says slowly. Carefully.
I take a deep breath, “Oh, and Alex found this really cute green elf costume that will go with my elf costume and I was thinking maybe all three of us could be elves. It would be cute and since Mom said she –“
“--MARIA!” Liz cries.
“Oh god, Liz. I’m scared,” I blurt.
Liz bites her lip.” Did they tell you?”
I comb my fingers through my hair self consciously and then cross my hands over my chest, “Your Mom is totally freaking out. She said stuff like “terminal” and “nothing the doctors can do”… and all this crap that just didn’t make sense to me,” I look at her hopefully, hoping she’s going to say that Nancy is just a drama queen.
“Leukemia, Maria,” Liz says slowly, “Its spread to other organs. My pancreas, some of my stomach…”
I swallow, “There’s chemotherapy.”
Liz is shaking her head. “They said they would try it if I wanted, but there’s really little point. I only have ten percent chance of survival. I’d rather, you know, spend the rest of the days that I have with the people I love. With my parents, you, Alex…not losing hope in a hospital bed.”
I’m not sure what I’m meant to say to that. Weird and crazy and stuff like this shouldn’t be happening to us. This morning I was planning my party and thinking what a shit-head Mr. Seligman was for giving us another quiz and this whole cancer business doesn’t fit into any of it. It doesn’t make any sense at all. I mean it just can’t get any weirder, you know?
Liz is still looking at me with her big brown eyes. It’s like, if God wanted to make someone who was everything that is good and pure (albeit a little mischievous at times – but that can be forgiven), it would be in the form of Liz.
Against my will I feel tears burning my eyelids. “How long?” I ask. My voice is squeaky and far away.
“One week, two, if I’m lucky.”
“Oh.” Two weeks. That’s 14 days. 336 hours. If I was good at Math I could probably figure the minutes I have left with my best friend.
“Yeah,” she replies looking down at the bed.
Then I’m grabbing her and holding her to my chest and I feel the gentle tremor go through her body. She’s scared too. Really, really scared.
- Max-
The door opens with a soft click. It’s our old house. Its dark, almost pitch black. The lights are switched off.
Why?... Mom never leaves them off.
As I walk toward the kitchen, it dawns on me.
I know what’s happened here. It’s happened so many times before.
It’s still a shock to my senses when I see them.
Dying bodies. On the kitchen floor.
Some bastard just left them there.
Mom. My baby sister, Emily….I try not to look at her tiny bloody face. Or the way her thick velvet hair is so beautiful that I want to run my fingers through it. I miss running my fingers through it.
Then the urge.
I want to heal them… I should heal them… can I heal them?
But I know it won’t work. Especially not in a dream. And I can’t heal them, because they’re dead, I try to console myself.
They’ve been dead for a long time.
And it’s all my fault.
Suddenly I feel weak, tired. Hopeless. Sorry.
…God, I’m so sorry.
I feel wetness run down my face.
So sorry…
I barely notice it at first. A soft flicker, becoming steadily brighter in my peripheral vision. This time it’s coming from the other side of door across the kitchen. Like candle light gaining strength and energy, morphing into bonfire. My heart starts to thump in my chest….slowly, then harder. Getting ready for the race against time. Loud, deafening, calling. The light is almost blinding.
Then I’m running toward it. With all the strength, and vigour I can muster. Running, running, and reaching….hoping. The door flies open. I strain my eyes, my fingers barely graze across a soft palm, and rich brown hair feathers my face.
And I’m falling.
Fuck!
I jerk upright in my bed. Cold sweat is running down my brow, my chest. My heart is a roaring drumbeat in my ears and pins and needles bristle my skin.
I was so close.
“Max?” Isabel’s standing at my door. She looks anxious, “Are you….I wish I could do something to help you,” she says in a pity filled voice.
I throw tangled, wet sheets off my bed, “I’m fine, Iz. Go back to sleep,” I turn away from her without another word.
There’s no movement, then she sighs and I can hear her footsteps disappearing down the hallway.
I roll back over, surrendering to the fact that sleep won’t be coming tonight.
Chapter 1
- Max-
I close my eyes amidst a cloud of cigarette smoke, allowing it to conquer my senses. Inhaling deeply, breathing it into my soul like somehow it will become a part of me and cleanse some of the stuff I would be better off forgetting.
I stand motionlessly in a darkened area at the back of the bleachers. A gravelly pathway curves into a hole in the wood where you can crawl through, and then there’s this cement wall about 15 inches from your face. Almost like a grave.
Bangers Paradise they call it.
You don’t have to be too creative to work out why they call it that ….and its nothing to do with sausages.
But right now it’s quiet. It’s where I need to be.
Stubbing out the cigarette in my hand, I roll up my jeans and bend my left leg against the wall, ignoring the protest of pain that sparks up my thigh. If I was an artist I’d probably be fascinated at the darkened intermingling of yellow and purple splashes across my swollen knee, but instead an odd thought goes through my mind.
I never did any of the biology assignments. She did them all, without an utter word of protest. I never even wondered why.
I stare at the bruise on my knee in contemplation.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
She’s dying. So what? People die all the time. There’s fucking massacre going on all over the world. She’s a girl. Just a girl. A human girl
Christ, I can’t even say…think her name.
Liz.
Her name is Liz.
Liz.
I squeeze my eyes as images assault my mind. Her tiny body in my arms, the poison in her blood, the aggressive tumour breeding in her organs. Then there’s that prickling. It never goes away. It’s like the time Isabel forced me to go to some weird-ass relaxation thing of hers. Little did I know they were going to poke the crap out of me with the sharpest needles I’d ever seen.
I concentrate on blocking it out. It resides, but I can still feel it in the depths of my mind – waiting to burst through my skin and engulf me.
I put my hand over my knee and touch the swelling. My hand glows warm, but then I stop. I don’t like to heal. And I haven’t. Not since a long, long time. My hand drops to my side.
Pain makes you feel more alive anyway.
I notice Isabel on the bleacher as I limp out of Bangers. She’s hard to miss. Bright pink top, leaning on her elbows, breasts thrust to the heavens as she lazily soaks up the sun. Michael is sitting one bleacher above her. Looking agitated. Nothing new then.
“Oh, look, it’s the bride,” Isabel motions behind me.
I turn around as I take the bottom bleacher. My eyes follow Tess as she disappears with some jock lagging behind her into Bangers. I feel nothing.
“She definitely has an appetite for those human boys.”
“Looks who’s talking,” Michael says pointedly.
Isabel shrugs, “It’s not like you can get someone from our kind to lick your slippers clean and then completely forget that they ever did it.”
Michael pauses and then turns to me in disdain, “your sister is sick,” he says it like whatever comes out of Isabel’s mouth is my fault.
“Come on, Michael. It’s not worse than what you’ve made some girls do,” Isabel narrows her eyes accusingly, “plus, I was joking. I haven’t actually made someone do that… yet”
Michael doesn’t seem to have anything else to say, so he snorts.
Isabel rolls her eyes and turns to me. “So. What happened this morning?”
I look at her. Nothing ever gets past Isabel and her allotted female clones who roam the halls of Roswell High in search of gossip. It’s like a necessity for their ever glacial survival or something.
“That Parker girl passed out,” Michael answers for me and then shakes his head as if to say “ humans”.
“Wasn’t she your bio partner, Max?” Isabel says looking at her nails. I can’t tell if she cares, or if she’s probing for something.
“She’s dying,” I say emotionlessly.
Michael and Isabel both turn to look at me.
“I saw it when I caught her. It’s aggressive. It’s already taken over most of her body.”
I don’t mention the intensity of the flash. Or the way my whole body has started to feel like there’s someone needling the fuck out of it.
“Wow,” Isabel says after a few seconds of contemplation, “poor girl. She was really sweet.”
“Smart as fuck,” Michael adds as a loving afterthought.
I say nothing. My fingers feel numb. My knee is throbbing crazily. The residue from the flashes is still making my body hum.
Michael stands up suddenly. “What are we doing for lunch?”
Isabel sits up, “There’s this joint opened up near the desert. We should try it.”
“Are you okay to drive?” Michael asks me.
“No, you drive. I don’t think my knee can take it.” I throw Michael my keys and get up shakily from the bench.
Isabel’s eyeing me.
“You can heal it you know,” she says when Michael walks off in front, “I mean it’s your own knee so it won’t you know…backfire.”
She looks a little hesitant; she knows I don’t like people talking about that night, even in passing reference.
I shrug, “I know.”
Isabel wordlessly puts her hand on my shoulder. I know it’s her way of offering support for my knee or maybe because she knows that I’ve had better days. But I shrug her hand off as we follow Michael to the jeep.
*****
-Maria-
I hate hospitals. I hate the sterile smile. I hate when parents cry. And I hate the fact that everything’s spinning like the time I sat under the maple tree in Windmere Park after having a fight with Mom, and drank straight from her whisky flask.
I’m hoping that it will stop spinning in a bit, but for that to happen, Nancy will have to stop sobbing on Moms shoulder and I’ll have to rewind that last twenty minutes. Because right now I’m only thinking two thoughts and they’re making things really spin out of control.
1. Liz is dying.
2. What the hell am I going to do without Liz?
Kind of selfish, right?
But Liz is… well, she’s my soul sister. She taught me how to colour inside the lines in my first ‘My Little Pony’ colouring book, she held me all night when my dad left, and she gave me my first tampon when I got my period. She’s there when I cry about boys, or when I temporarily leave home because being there just sucks way too much.
So there’s no room in my life for Liz to leave, or there will be too much room when she leaves. Or something…
“Maria sweetie, where are you going?” Mom asks, rubbing her hand up and down Nancy’s back like she’s a baby needing to be burped. I suddenly realise that I’ve gotten up from my seat and am absent-mindedly walking towards Liz’s ward room.
“I was going to check –“
“--she probably needs some time with her father,” Mom says.
“Oh,” I sit back down on the plastic chair and stare ahead blankly.
“Its okay, Maria. Go in,” Jeff appears at the door looking dishevelled, “she’s asking for you.”
I take a deep breath and push open the white ward door as I walk into Liz’s room.
She’s staring at her hands and looks up at me as I walk in.
“Hey,” she’s smiling. I can see tiredness, but she has this ethereal glow about her. Like maybe she’s already died and come back as an angel.
I feel a lump rise to my throat as I sit down on the foot of her bed and stare at her. God she’s so beautiful.
“You okay?” She asks.
I stare. Why is she asking if I’m okay? Hell, this is so darned ironic. I think I’m going to laugh.
Wait.Am I okay?
“Maria?” Liz prompts.
I lick my dry lips, “ I was going to ask Mom again about the soap factory next week, but she’s a little busy now. But listen, I’ve been thinking really hard about the cake. You know blueberry will really clash with my green outfit….”
Liz’s eyes widen in confusion but I continue to talk anyway.
“…. so that’s a big no, no. I was also thinking that maybe we’d have plain cake instead of blueberry. I know you would prefer that –though, it’s not only because you would prefer it, I just have a really anal family…”
….What the hell am I talking about?!
“In fact I was thinking that maybe we could have two cakes.”
“Maria…,” Liz says slowly. Carefully.
I take a deep breath, “Oh, and Alex found this really cute green elf costume that will go with my elf costume and I was thinking maybe all three of us could be elves. It would be cute and since Mom said she –“
“--MARIA!” Liz cries.
“Oh god, Liz. I’m scared,” I blurt.
Liz bites her lip.” Did they tell you?”
I comb my fingers through my hair self consciously and then cross my hands over my chest, “Your Mom is totally freaking out. She said stuff like “terminal” and “nothing the doctors can do”… and all this crap that just didn’t make sense to me,” I look at her hopefully, hoping she’s going to say that Nancy is just a drama queen.
“Leukemia, Maria,” Liz says slowly, “Its spread to other organs. My pancreas, some of my stomach…”
I swallow, “There’s chemotherapy.”
Liz is shaking her head. “They said they would try it if I wanted, but there’s really little point. I only have ten percent chance of survival. I’d rather, you know, spend the rest of the days that I have with the people I love. With my parents, you, Alex…not losing hope in a hospital bed.”
I’m not sure what I’m meant to say to that. Weird and crazy and stuff like this shouldn’t be happening to us. This morning I was planning my party and thinking what a shit-head Mr. Seligman was for giving us another quiz and this whole cancer business doesn’t fit into any of it. It doesn’t make any sense at all. I mean it just can’t get any weirder, you know?
Liz is still looking at me with her big brown eyes. It’s like, if God wanted to make someone who was everything that is good and pure (albeit a little mischievous at times – but that can be forgiven), it would be in the form of Liz.
Against my will I feel tears burning my eyelids. “How long?” I ask. My voice is squeaky and far away.
“One week, two, if I’m lucky.”
“Oh.” Two weeks. That’s 14 days. 336 hours. If I was good at Math I could probably figure the minutes I have left with my best friend.
“Yeah,” she replies looking down at the bed.
Then I’m grabbing her and holding her to my chest and I feel the gentle tremor go through her body. She’s scared too. Really, really scared.
- Max-
The door opens with a soft click. It’s our old house. Its dark, almost pitch black. The lights are switched off.
Why?... Mom never leaves them off.
As I walk toward the kitchen, it dawns on me.
I know what’s happened here. It’s happened so many times before.
It’s still a shock to my senses when I see them.
Dying bodies. On the kitchen floor.
Some bastard just left them there.
Mom. My baby sister, Emily….I try not to look at her tiny bloody face. Or the way her thick velvet hair is so beautiful that I want to run my fingers through it. I miss running my fingers through it.
Then the urge.
I want to heal them… I should heal them… can I heal them?
But I know it won’t work. Especially not in a dream. And I can’t heal them, because they’re dead, I try to console myself.
They’ve been dead for a long time.
And it’s all my fault.
Suddenly I feel weak, tired. Hopeless. Sorry.
…God, I’m so sorry.
I feel wetness run down my face.
So sorry…
I barely notice it at first. A soft flicker, becoming steadily brighter in my peripheral vision. This time it’s coming from the other side of door across the kitchen. Like candle light gaining strength and energy, morphing into bonfire. My heart starts to thump in my chest….slowly, then harder. Getting ready for the race against time. Loud, deafening, calling. The light is almost blinding.
Then I’m running toward it. With all the strength, and vigour I can muster. Running, running, and reaching….hoping. The door flies open. I strain my eyes, my fingers barely graze across a soft palm, and rich brown hair feathers my face.
And I’m falling.
Fuck!
I jerk upright in my bed. Cold sweat is running down my brow, my chest. My heart is a roaring drumbeat in my ears and pins and needles bristle my skin.
I was so close.
“Max?” Isabel’s standing at my door. She looks anxious, “Are you….I wish I could do something to help you,” she says in a pity filled voice.
I throw tangled, wet sheets off my bed, “I’m fine, Iz. Go back to sleep,” I turn away from her without another word.
There’s no movement, then she sighs and I can hear her footsteps disappearing down the hallway.
I roll back over, surrendering to the fact that sleep won’t be coming tonight.
Last edited by Blue*Soul on Wed Oct 15, 2008 2:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Seeking Surrender (M/L, chapter 1, 08/30)
Hey all, thanks for reading!! Here's the next part...
Seeking Surrender
Chapter 2
-Max-
Light trinkets of rain feather my skin as I walk the streets of Roswell. My mind slipping back to the gathering.
It’s time, Max.
Time to take the lead. Time to take on everything you were ever destined for. Time to make us proud, my son.
Of course.
I knew this all along. I knew from the age of five that my destiny was written for me. When I turned eighteen that this would be it. And like Michael keeps banging on about…it is an honor….
…to chair the ruling council, to make key decisions for a powerful, ancient community that’s been hidden for decades. To come from the ruling bloodline, and to join, through ancient vows, the two most powerful families in the Alien community.
So why the hell is it irking me so much?
A rich smell tingles my nostrils and I realize where I am. The West side. I’m standing in front of a small restaurant pretty hot with the tourists. Crashdown Café they call it. My eyes travel skyward where a flashing spaceship in various luminous colours light up the darkening sky.
I snort. If only they really knew…
Stubbing out the cigarette in my hand against a nearby lamp post, I find myself walking in. I don’t know why. I generally tend to avoid this place.
The chime jingles as I push the door open. Maria looks up from her note pad and then does a double take a.k.a. surprise.
“Hi….Max?” she says unsurely.
“Hey.” I reply and walk toward the counter. We stare at each other. It’s a little weird.
Her eyes are shifting and then as normal, she breaks the silence in a swooping, undecipherable ramble. “Thanks for the other day. When she fell I mean… I don’t know where you came from, but she could have really hurt herself you know? And you came and it was a good catch, I mean really good…”
“Where’s Liz?” I say half to shut her up.
I didn’t actually come here to ask for Liz.
At least not on purpose.
She pauses and looks a little shocked at my request. I guess “asking for Liz” wasn’t on the list of things that she expected from me either.
“She’s in bed….um, can I get you something?”
“Can I talk to her?”
Okay. That’s another I wasn’t expecting. From Maria’s face, it’s a surprise to the both of us.
“Um, I… she’s asleep.”
“Hey, Max.”
I turn. Liz peeks at me from the backdoor; she starts to walk toward us with some effort. And then she’s close beside me. Really close. Her face is pale and drawn, and she clutches onto the counter for support.
“I thought you were sleeping,” Maria says from behind us.
“I wanted to get a drink.”
“Hi.” I say.
Liz brushes a strand of her hair behind her ear and looks at me shyly.
I stare at her hair. It falls back into perfect alignment from where it started.
“Did you want something, Max?” Liz says finally.
Did I want something?
“Can I get some pie?”
“Sure.” Liz says without questioning.
Maria lets out an awkward cough and looks oddly between us.
I fall into a chair a little away from the counter and then I look down at my watch. Its 9.35 PM, Wednesday night. Two days since Liz collapsed at school. I try not to wonder why she’s not at the hospital being intensively probed. A steaming apple pie drops in front of me and I look up.
“Is there anything else I can get you?” Liz is smiling sweetly, but there’s strain behind her eyes. Like it might be hard for her to stand. I try not to look too long at her face though.
“Sit down?”
It’s not authoritative. But without a word she slips into the booth opposite me. I resort to staring at her hair. She fiddles with her fingers.
“About the biology assignment for next week. I might not be able to get it done,” she says looking down at her hands, “I mean, I know I said that I would take care of it when I last saw you…”
When I last saw her? Besides Monday… that must have been months ago.
“…but something’s just come up. So I won’t really be able to do it all. I mean I can try and do an outline …”
“What did the doctor say?”
Liz looks up at me and bites her lower lip. Normally it gets me as much as the hair thing, but today impatience tingles my skin.
“Can they get rid of it?” I go on when she doesn’t answer.
“What?” Liz scratches her neck consciously.
“The doctor,” I say impatiently, “can they get rid of the cancer?”
Then this moment of realization hits the both of us.
Oh. Fuck. Me.
She looks at me with wide eyes, and I’m thinking. Max, you are a fucking moron. Why don’t you just go ahead and tell her what you are? Why don’t you just stand on the table top and scream out every single lie that your community has been telling these humans? ….Why don’t you just reveal everything that is sacred to your kind?
“Excuse me.” Liz says suddenly and then she’s scraping her chair back, her eyes tearing up.
“Liz…” I begin. But she’s already gone.
I groan. Way to go, Max. Smart, smart move.
“What did you say to her?” Maria appears from nowhere, her eyes narrowed and a seriously bobbing hair-band atop her head.
Annoyed at myself, I abruptly stand up, pull out money and throw it on the table next to the untouched pie.
“Hey, wait!” I hear Maria cry just before the door closes behind me.
*****
-Liz-
I stare at my toes in utter concentration. The silver polish is chipped. And I never let it chip. I hate chipped nail polish. It comes right up there with my other pet hates, like nails on a blackboard, or an untidy bathroom. But right now, I don’t care. I mean you should see my bathroom. It’s a mess.
“Wow. That was really awkward… and strange…” Maria says as she follows me into the living room behind the Crashdown, looking extremely befuddled.
She pauses when she notices my toe fixation, “Liz. Are you ok?”
I thrust my toes to Marias face. “Do they look really bad?”
“Uh,” she says moving away slightly, “what are we looking at?”
“The nails. The color is chipped.”
“I can’t see it.”
“See, right there by the big toe…” I wriggle my toe for emphasis.
“I really can’t see it.”
“It’s okay. I don’t care.”
“You don’t?” she looks even more confused. I’m not sure if Maria or I will lose it first. My bet is Maria.
“Nope.” I shake my head, “This stuff is stupid. I mean it really doesn’t matter.”
“No?”
“No.”
“Okay.”
“Cool.”
There’s silence where she’s wondering if she should speak or wait for me to go first. “He asked about my cancer.”
“Oh?”
“Nobody knows about my cancer,” I look up, “I told Mom and Dad that I didn’t want people to know.”
“Maybe someone let it slip?”
“Maybe,” I shrug.
But it’s still weird. Only Maria, Alex and my immediate family know…. So who could have possibly…?
Maria is still looking at me in a mixture of confusion and contemplation. I wish she would stop doing that – sure, every single breath is painful but does she really have to look at me like I’m going to pop it any moment now.
The thing is, I could pop it any moment now.
Sometimes the pain is so bad, I’m not even sure if I’m breathing anymore. And that’s when it’s most difficult to hide it from them. I have the sudden realization that the next week is going to be exactly like this. People hawking over me – trying to figure out when the moment will come.
“Liz…,” Maria says carefully.
“….Max came to me in my dream last night,” I say suddenly.
“What?” That befuddled expression again. I think it’s causing her frown lines.
“He said that he really wanted to help me.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, he knew about the cancer. But he said his hands were tied.”
“Wow.”
We both pause and I continue to stare at my toes. I don’t care about the color chipping. I really don’t.
“But it’s just a dream, Liz. You know, coincidence…that he just turned up…right?... God, this is weird. Me being the rational one and all.”
“I know, Maria. It’s a stupid dream. I’m fine. I’m coming to terms with it… with what’s happening… and I know Max can’t save my life.”
Maria sits down beside me and strokes my back, “No, he can’t Liz…”
I know she’s trying really, really hard to not cry. This must be so hard on her.
I feel a cramp engulf my body and I bite my lip and wait for it to subside. Thankfully Maria doesn’t seem to notice.
“…Maybe because you’ve liked him for so long,” she goes on, “ And now that you’re ill, he’s just all of a sudden showing up everywhere and so you’re probably making this weird connection in your dreams.”
“ Probably,” I shrug.
Maria continues to stroke my back. “God, baby I’m so sorry.”
Her eyes are starting to water.
“Maria, please don’t.” I plead. I hate when she starts…because most of all, it makes me sad for her, and everybody who has to go through the whole process of trying to adjust when I’m gone. I mean it’s not really a problem for me, because I’ll just be gone, you know? No memories, no cares, no nothing. But for those that are left behind it’s another story.
“Okay.” Maria sits up straight. She’s beginning to master this whole self control thing and I’m really proud of her. “Maybe you should do something.”
“Do what?” I frown.
“Carpe diem! Seize the moment with Max,” Her eyes are lighting up, “Think about it… it’s perfect!”
“I get what I want, and I won’t live long enough to see if he really is the ass that girls make him out to be?”
“That’s not what I meant… “she says quickly. Shamefully.
I shake my head, realizing how harsh that sounded. “Hey, it’s okay. But first for something like that to happen, he would actually have to show some sort of interest in me,” I roll my eyes, “and he just avoids me, you know?, and second, I think dating someone who is dying might be a tiny bit freaky.”
“Hmm.” Maria says in thought. “Maybe it won’t be.”
“It’ll be totally freaky!”
She laughs at my outburst, and the chimes jingle letting us know that customers have arrived. Maria looks inside her apron for an order pad. “Well, just so you know, stranger things have happened…” she throws an air kiss back at me as she walks back into the restaurant.
I turn back to staring at my toes thinking things would have to get really weird for it to get any stranger….right?
*****
-Laurie-
I frown as I try and decipher the runic symbols in the book, scanning my brain for what Sophia taught me before she passed away. But as time goes on my memory continues to fade. There are bits and pieces that I can put together – but other stuff… it’s just way too encoded.
There is something important in those words. Something worth learning…but I can’t seem to be able to put my finger on exactly what it is.
I rub my eyes and scan for a lavender candle from the shelf filled with every single scent under the sun. Lavender is my favourite – it always has been. Something about it just nurtures my personal energy. Pulling the purple candle out from its dusty place on the store shelf, I wave my hand over the wick and just like that, a bright, vibrant flame comes into being.
A small gust of wind makes the flame waver and I hear the door clang. Only one person visits the store at this time of night.
“Hey.” His voice is almost as soft as the gust of wind that runs through the store.
“Hey sweetheart,” I smile warmly and drop a kiss on Max’s cheek. His hair is dishevelled, still a little damp from the drizzle outside and his skin is cold, almost like he’s been walking around for a while.
I take a step back. As usual he’s dressed in dark sombre colours that fade into the setting around him. “How are you today?”
He shrugs nonchalantly, “Okay.”
“Here,” I lean behind me and pick up some Ginger cookies that lay next to the cash register. “Try these. I made them today.”
He looks down at the box and I see a rare but sincere smile curve his lips. “Should I brace myself to get poisoned?”
I roll my eyes. “You know what, it’s probably a good thing you can’t get poisoned.”
“Otherwise I would have met my demise a long time ago?”
I laugh, “Demise? I see you’re probably acing literature this year.”
“My eloquence is apparent, huh?”
I playfully ruffle his hair, enjoying his laughter. Sometimes its a long time before I see it.
“Is everything okay?” I bring up the topic carefully. I can clearly sense his unease, but he doesn’t like it when I try to form a connection, or probe too deep. His moods can be complex to say the least.
“Um, I was actually hoping you could look at my knee.” He says almost shyly.
I turn behind me, and pull out a chair from behind the counter that holds the cash register, and with difficulty (due to little space) I drop it next to him. I watch as he sits and pulls his pants past his knee tentatively.
I make my way around and kneel down in front of him. “Christ Max, what happened?”
“I fell.”
“You fell?”
“Yes.”
I throw him a disapproving frown.
“Stop looking at me like that.”
“Well, don’t lie to me.”
He sighs, and then on second thought says, “Do you know Liz Parker?” I catch his lip tremble before he hides it. How odd.
“The girl whose parents own the Crashdown? My Mom used to know Jeff pretty well.”
“She fell. I caught her. ” He says abruptly.
I look at him. When it comes to Max I know when to end a topic.
“You know you can heal this yourself, right?” I say, bringing the candle closer so I can view his bruises more clearly, and then watch him flinch as I touch the skin close to his kneecap. “As a natural healer you can heal yourself without any repercussions.”
“I don’t …I was just hoping you could do some of your voodoo stuff,” he smiles charmingly.
I raise my eyebrow playfully, “I wouldn’t call it that, but let me see what I can do.”
He nods, and slumps into the chair, as I pick pots and balms and watch him from the corner of my eye. His lashes are darkened shadows against his cheeks as he looks down at his fingers. His aura is a deepened red, troubled. And I can’t help but wish there was something I could do to help his soul too.
Seeking Surrender
Chapter 2
-Max-
Light trinkets of rain feather my skin as I walk the streets of Roswell. My mind slipping back to the gathering.
It’s time, Max.
Time to take the lead. Time to take on everything you were ever destined for. Time to make us proud, my son.
Of course.
I knew this all along. I knew from the age of five that my destiny was written for me. When I turned eighteen that this would be it. And like Michael keeps banging on about…it is an honor….
…to chair the ruling council, to make key decisions for a powerful, ancient community that’s been hidden for decades. To come from the ruling bloodline, and to join, through ancient vows, the two most powerful families in the Alien community.
So why the hell is it irking me so much?
A rich smell tingles my nostrils and I realize where I am. The West side. I’m standing in front of a small restaurant pretty hot with the tourists. Crashdown Café they call it. My eyes travel skyward where a flashing spaceship in various luminous colours light up the darkening sky.
I snort. If only they really knew…
Stubbing out the cigarette in my hand against a nearby lamp post, I find myself walking in. I don’t know why. I generally tend to avoid this place.
The chime jingles as I push the door open. Maria looks up from her note pad and then does a double take a.k.a. surprise.
“Hi….Max?” she says unsurely.
“Hey.” I reply and walk toward the counter. We stare at each other. It’s a little weird.
Her eyes are shifting and then as normal, she breaks the silence in a swooping, undecipherable ramble. “Thanks for the other day. When she fell I mean… I don’t know where you came from, but she could have really hurt herself you know? And you came and it was a good catch, I mean really good…”
“Where’s Liz?” I say half to shut her up.
I didn’t actually come here to ask for Liz.
At least not on purpose.
She pauses and looks a little shocked at my request. I guess “asking for Liz” wasn’t on the list of things that she expected from me either.
“She’s in bed….um, can I get you something?”
“Can I talk to her?”
Okay. That’s another I wasn’t expecting. From Maria’s face, it’s a surprise to the both of us.
“Um, I… she’s asleep.”
“Hey, Max.”
I turn. Liz peeks at me from the backdoor; she starts to walk toward us with some effort. And then she’s close beside me. Really close. Her face is pale and drawn, and she clutches onto the counter for support.
“I thought you were sleeping,” Maria says from behind us.
“I wanted to get a drink.”
“Hi.” I say.
Liz brushes a strand of her hair behind her ear and looks at me shyly.
I stare at her hair. It falls back into perfect alignment from where it started.
“Did you want something, Max?” Liz says finally.
Did I want something?
“Can I get some pie?”
“Sure.” Liz says without questioning.
Maria lets out an awkward cough and looks oddly between us.
I fall into a chair a little away from the counter and then I look down at my watch. Its 9.35 PM, Wednesday night. Two days since Liz collapsed at school. I try not to wonder why she’s not at the hospital being intensively probed. A steaming apple pie drops in front of me and I look up.
“Is there anything else I can get you?” Liz is smiling sweetly, but there’s strain behind her eyes. Like it might be hard for her to stand. I try not to look too long at her face though.
“Sit down?”
It’s not authoritative. But without a word she slips into the booth opposite me. I resort to staring at her hair. She fiddles with her fingers.
“About the biology assignment for next week. I might not be able to get it done,” she says looking down at her hands, “I mean, I know I said that I would take care of it when I last saw you…”
When I last saw her? Besides Monday… that must have been months ago.
“…but something’s just come up. So I won’t really be able to do it all. I mean I can try and do an outline …”
“What did the doctor say?”
Liz looks up at me and bites her lower lip. Normally it gets me as much as the hair thing, but today impatience tingles my skin.
“Can they get rid of it?” I go on when she doesn’t answer.
“What?” Liz scratches her neck consciously.
“The doctor,” I say impatiently, “can they get rid of the cancer?”
Then this moment of realization hits the both of us.
Oh. Fuck. Me.
She looks at me with wide eyes, and I’m thinking. Max, you are a fucking moron. Why don’t you just go ahead and tell her what you are? Why don’t you just stand on the table top and scream out every single lie that your community has been telling these humans? ….Why don’t you just reveal everything that is sacred to your kind?
“Excuse me.” Liz says suddenly and then she’s scraping her chair back, her eyes tearing up.
“Liz…” I begin. But she’s already gone.
I groan. Way to go, Max. Smart, smart move.
“What did you say to her?” Maria appears from nowhere, her eyes narrowed and a seriously bobbing hair-band atop her head.
Annoyed at myself, I abruptly stand up, pull out money and throw it on the table next to the untouched pie.
“Hey, wait!” I hear Maria cry just before the door closes behind me.
*****
-Liz-
I stare at my toes in utter concentration. The silver polish is chipped. And I never let it chip. I hate chipped nail polish. It comes right up there with my other pet hates, like nails on a blackboard, or an untidy bathroom. But right now, I don’t care. I mean you should see my bathroom. It’s a mess.
“Wow. That was really awkward… and strange…” Maria says as she follows me into the living room behind the Crashdown, looking extremely befuddled.
She pauses when she notices my toe fixation, “Liz. Are you ok?”
I thrust my toes to Marias face. “Do they look really bad?”
“Uh,” she says moving away slightly, “what are we looking at?”
“The nails. The color is chipped.”
“I can’t see it.”
“See, right there by the big toe…” I wriggle my toe for emphasis.
“I really can’t see it.”
“It’s okay. I don’t care.”
“You don’t?” she looks even more confused. I’m not sure if Maria or I will lose it first. My bet is Maria.
“Nope.” I shake my head, “This stuff is stupid. I mean it really doesn’t matter.”
“No?”
“No.”
“Okay.”
“Cool.”
There’s silence where she’s wondering if she should speak or wait for me to go first. “He asked about my cancer.”
“Oh?”
“Nobody knows about my cancer,” I look up, “I told Mom and Dad that I didn’t want people to know.”
“Maybe someone let it slip?”
“Maybe,” I shrug.
But it’s still weird. Only Maria, Alex and my immediate family know…. So who could have possibly…?
Maria is still looking at me in a mixture of confusion and contemplation. I wish she would stop doing that – sure, every single breath is painful but does she really have to look at me like I’m going to pop it any moment now.
The thing is, I could pop it any moment now.
Sometimes the pain is so bad, I’m not even sure if I’m breathing anymore. And that’s when it’s most difficult to hide it from them. I have the sudden realization that the next week is going to be exactly like this. People hawking over me – trying to figure out when the moment will come.
“Liz…,” Maria says carefully.
“….Max came to me in my dream last night,” I say suddenly.
“What?” That befuddled expression again. I think it’s causing her frown lines.
“He said that he really wanted to help me.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, he knew about the cancer. But he said his hands were tied.”
“Wow.”
We both pause and I continue to stare at my toes. I don’t care about the color chipping. I really don’t.
“But it’s just a dream, Liz. You know, coincidence…that he just turned up…right?... God, this is weird. Me being the rational one and all.”
“I know, Maria. It’s a stupid dream. I’m fine. I’m coming to terms with it… with what’s happening… and I know Max can’t save my life.”
Maria sits down beside me and strokes my back, “No, he can’t Liz…”
I know she’s trying really, really hard to not cry. This must be so hard on her.
I feel a cramp engulf my body and I bite my lip and wait for it to subside. Thankfully Maria doesn’t seem to notice.
“…Maybe because you’ve liked him for so long,” she goes on, “ And now that you’re ill, he’s just all of a sudden showing up everywhere and so you’re probably making this weird connection in your dreams.”
“ Probably,” I shrug.
Maria continues to stroke my back. “God, baby I’m so sorry.”
Her eyes are starting to water.
“Maria, please don’t.” I plead. I hate when she starts…because most of all, it makes me sad for her, and everybody who has to go through the whole process of trying to adjust when I’m gone. I mean it’s not really a problem for me, because I’ll just be gone, you know? No memories, no cares, no nothing. But for those that are left behind it’s another story.
“Okay.” Maria sits up straight. She’s beginning to master this whole self control thing and I’m really proud of her. “Maybe you should do something.”
“Do what?” I frown.
“Carpe diem! Seize the moment with Max,” Her eyes are lighting up, “Think about it… it’s perfect!”
“I get what I want, and I won’t live long enough to see if he really is the ass that girls make him out to be?”
“That’s not what I meant… “she says quickly. Shamefully.
I shake my head, realizing how harsh that sounded. “Hey, it’s okay. But first for something like that to happen, he would actually have to show some sort of interest in me,” I roll my eyes, “and he just avoids me, you know?, and second, I think dating someone who is dying might be a tiny bit freaky.”
“Hmm.” Maria says in thought. “Maybe it won’t be.”
“It’ll be totally freaky!”
She laughs at my outburst, and the chimes jingle letting us know that customers have arrived. Maria looks inside her apron for an order pad. “Well, just so you know, stranger things have happened…” she throws an air kiss back at me as she walks back into the restaurant.
I turn back to staring at my toes thinking things would have to get really weird for it to get any stranger….right?
*****
-Laurie-
I frown as I try and decipher the runic symbols in the book, scanning my brain for what Sophia taught me before she passed away. But as time goes on my memory continues to fade. There are bits and pieces that I can put together – but other stuff… it’s just way too encoded.
There is something important in those words. Something worth learning…but I can’t seem to be able to put my finger on exactly what it is.
I rub my eyes and scan for a lavender candle from the shelf filled with every single scent under the sun. Lavender is my favourite – it always has been. Something about it just nurtures my personal energy. Pulling the purple candle out from its dusty place on the store shelf, I wave my hand over the wick and just like that, a bright, vibrant flame comes into being.
A small gust of wind makes the flame waver and I hear the door clang. Only one person visits the store at this time of night.
“Hey.” His voice is almost as soft as the gust of wind that runs through the store.
“Hey sweetheart,” I smile warmly and drop a kiss on Max’s cheek. His hair is dishevelled, still a little damp from the drizzle outside and his skin is cold, almost like he’s been walking around for a while.
I take a step back. As usual he’s dressed in dark sombre colours that fade into the setting around him. “How are you today?”
He shrugs nonchalantly, “Okay.”
“Here,” I lean behind me and pick up some Ginger cookies that lay next to the cash register. “Try these. I made them today.”
He looks down at the box and I see a rare but sincere smile curve his lips. “Should I brace myself to get poisoned?”
I roll my eyes. “You know what, it’s probably a good thing you can’t get poisoned.”
“Otherwise I would have met my demise a long time ago?”
I laugh, “Demise? I see you’re probably acing literature this year.”
“My eloquence is apparent, huh?”
I playfully ruffle his hair, enjoying his laughter. Sometimes its a long time before I see it.
“Is everything okay?” I bring up the topic carefully. I can clearly sense his unease, but he doesn’t like it when I try to form a connection, or probe too deep. His moods can be complex to say the least.
“Um, I was actually hoping you could look at my knee.” He says almost shyly.
I turn behind me, and pull out a chair from behind the counter that holds the cash register, and with difficulty (due to little space) I drop it next to him. I watch as he sits and pulls his pants past his knee tentatively.
I make my way around and kneel down in front of him. “Christ Max, what happened?”
“I fell.”
“You fell?”
“Yes.”
I throw him a disapproving frown.
“Stop looking at me like that.”
“Well, don’t lie to me.”
He sighs, and then on second thought says, “Do you know Liz Parker?” I catch his lip tremble before he hides it. How odd.
“The girl whose parents own the Crashdown? My Mom used to know Jeff pretty well.”
“She fell. I caught her. ” He says abruptly.
I look at him. When it comes to Max I know when to end a topic.
“You know you can heal this yourself, right?” I say, bringing the candle closer so I can view his bruises more clearly, and then watch him flinch as I touch the skin close to his kneecap. “As a natural healer you can heal yourself without any repercussions.”
“I don’t …I was just hoping you could do some of your voodoo stuff,” he smiles charmingly.
I raise my eyebrow playfully, “I wouldn’t call it that, but let me see what I can do.”
He nods, and slumps into the chair, as I pick pots and balms and watch him from the corner of my eye. His lashes are darkened shadows against his cheeks as he looks down at his fingers. His aura is a deepened red, troubled. And I can’t help but wish there was something I could do to help his soul too.
Re: Seeking Surrender (M/L, chapter 2, 09/05)
Question of the day: who is Laurie?
Well, the image of Laurie in my head is the same girl from the show. I imagine her a little older than Max. Maybe 25 years old. Yes she is an alien. No she is not the future wife of Max. I guess you guys will get to know her a bit more as the story progresses.
As for why Max has issues with healing – it will be different from the show. More explanation soon!
Seeking Surrender
Chapter 3
[i-]Max-[/i]
“You know, it’s a good thing the food is good, otherwise I’d question why we keep ending up here.”
I pretend not to hear Michael’s innuendo filled, yet succinctly directed remark, as I chew on another fry and watch Maria and one other blonde waitress wrestle their way around customers in the much too crammed restaurant.
I didn’t realize that this place could get so busy.
Isabel rolls her eyes rather emphatically from beside him. “I think good is taking it a bit far. My burger is rare.” She sighs and rolls her eyes again.
Isabel’s eye roll thing is like a permanent tic that one needs get used to ignoring. Sometimes I think I’ve mastered it. Other times I just kinda want to tape her eyes closed.
“It looks fine to me,” Michael says in between mouthfuls of food. “Here tryphe phis.” He shoves a half eaten burger in her face.
“Gross Michael.” Isabel scrunches up her face in renewed disgust. “ I asked for well done, I hate rare” she sighs, and then seethes under her breath, “I can’t even ask her to come back because it will take her at least twenty minutes to notice me and another twenty to bring it back,…so,” she looks at me darkly, “why do keep ending up here?”
I shrug as I watch about ten more people file into the Crashdown. A couple of them are familiar faces. “Because the food is good?”
Isabel opens her mouth to retort back, but Maria flings herself at our table looking frustrated and breathless. It’s almost amusing.
“Hey. Hey guys. Is everything good?”
“No, actually---“ Isabel begins tartly.
“Good, good. Let me know if there is anything else you need. Ok?” Maria says, turning back to her circus of customers.
Isabel does the eye roll and gets up from her chair abruptly (or is it the other way around?). “I’m outta here.”
“Me too,” says Michael licking his fingers clean, and shoving back his chair. He turns to me with a sudden sombre expression on his face. “There’s a Gathering in half an hour, Max. Don’t forget –“
“Yeah, yeah yeah.” I brush him off. It’s not like the schedule isn’t inherently etched in my mind that I need yet another reminder.
They both leave and I watch Maria struggle with three sets of customers before I get up from my table, and silently follow her through the back door that she’s just disappeared through.
“Where’s that friggin’ ice cream scoop thing? Where did Agnes leave it? Shit. Shit. Shit! Where is….hey, there it is……Oh!” Maria takes a sudden step back and puts her hand over her heart in surprise when she notices me. “…er, you’re not allowed to be back here.” She says really fast.
“I know.” I say ominously.
More ominous because the truth is, it’s not really the food. I can’t explain why the hell I keep ending up here (and dragging Isabel and Michael with me). All I know is, I can’t get this place out of my mind. This of course does nothing to help the –lord help me, there’s a psycho stalker in the vicinity- look on Maria’s face.
“Okay then…” she points toward the door with a trembling finger.
Apparently I make people tremble.
Not wanting to cause a scene, I nod my head and then slowly, and rather moronically, turn around and start to walk toward the door. Maria takes a sudden step back when I turn back around, looking like she might scream.
I clear my throat.
“I was just wondering if you…you’d…” I gulp.
God, what the fuck is wrong with me? Out with it already.
Maria narrows her eyes. “If I’d….?”
My eyes shift to the counter. There’s chocolate powder there.
“Tried chocolate milk recently?”
“What?”
I clear my throat (if anyone hasn’t guessed, that wasn’t why I came back here either). “It tastes good.”
Maria clears her throat. “I’m sure it does….”
“Yeah…”
Silence.
Awkwardness.
Need to figure out personal issues (possibly not in that order).
“Okay well. “I smile widely, “I’m going to go.”
“Cool…” then she mumbles really quietly under her breath, “ Otherwise I’d have to get security to throw you out.”
“You guys have security?”
Maria mouth widens at the idea that I actually heard what she said. Supersensitive hearing comes with the whole alien package.
“I just say that to guys who are starting to freak …we don’t have security…. it’s just Alex… he’s not very…” She sighs, and says accusatorily, “You’ve been turning up a lot you know.”
“Really?” I say nonchalantly.
“Yes.” she gives me a hardened, suspicious look. One a parent might give their kid when they know they’ve been up to no good, but have no way to prove it.
I know my face is perfectly blank when I say, “I didn’t realize. I’ll try to cut it out.”
I turn around and walk back through the way I came in. I stand by the bathroom doors until Maria comes out and throws herself back into a throng of customers. Then I take the opportunity to make my way back in through the kitchen, through another door and up some stairs. As I walk past a master bedroom, the weird prickling begins in my chest, but it’s expected. And if I really give myself time to think about it, I also know that I’m treading extremely dangerous territory.
I walk on anyway.
I come to stop in front of another room. The door is slightly ajar. From where I stand I can see a double bed. There’s a desk opposite, laid with various accessories. Mainly school stuff and photos of her friends. Her room is smaller than mine, but also fuller. Then there’s a small click, and Liz walks out of the bathroom, dark hair covering delicate features and just like she knew I was here all along she turns and looks directly at me.
For a second, I see fear mask her features, but then her face changes to something soft.
“Max?” she bites her lip. Her voice quiet.
“Hi, Liz.” I move forward awkwardly.
“What are you doing here?”
I clear my throat and say the first thing that comes to mind. “About our assignment.”
“Oh.” She looks crestfallen.
Who wouldn’t be? The girl is dying. And I come here to ask her about a damned assignment.
Yes. That’s why I came…
…the assignment.
She’s looking at me questioningly beneath dark lashes.
“What about the assignment?” She moves her head sideways to get a clearer view of me.
I realize I am still standing behind the shadow of the door. Camouflage comes easy to me. I take a slight step forward, toward the boundary marking her room, but not quite inside yet. “I think I can do it myself.”
I think I see a hint of a smile. “Good.”
She awkwardly bites her lip again. They’re a perfect, full red contrasting against her pale, almost translucent skin.
“I just needed to borrow some of your old notes.”
“My old notes?... “ She smiles and fingers her desk. “I always wondered if you were concentrating really hard or asleep with your eyes open.”
“Most definitely asleep with my eyes open.”
She looks up at me like the answer was unexpected, and then breaks out into a laugh. And in that moment, just like that, all the tiredness and anxiety is wiped from her face. It stuns me and I try not to stare.
“Do you want to sit? My room is a bit of a mess.”
My eyes scan her room as I take a tentative step inside. I have no idea what she means when she says “mess”. It’s extraordinarily neat. I take two large steps forward, and the mattress shifts beneath my weight as I sit on the edge. Her room smells faintly of lavender and vanilla. I notice her duvet is brown and orange, covered with geometrical shapes. She has three posters on the wall. One of the Milky Way, another of Pleiades cluster and a third of…. Enrique Iglesias. My eyes turn back to the astronomy posters. I notice a telescope bundled at the corner of her room.
Her cheeks have blossomed a healthy pink when I turn to look at her. “It’s old. The poster is almost two years old. I kinda had a crush on him…and I need to take it down, um, let me find your notes.” She’s speaking really fast.
“Sure.” I cross my hands over my chest and sit awkwardly. Trying not to think about the fact that it would take me just 10 minutes to do this assignment if I really put my mind to it.
Without any notes whatsoever.
****
-Liz-
It’s weird how loud the roar of blood is in my ears despite the medication I’ve been taking. Usually it makes me so numb. But I guess the effect must be wearing off because I can’t remember the last time I reacted to someone this way.
It’s totally irrational.
I mean Max Evans is in my room. So what? I’m sure he’s been to other rooms. Better rooms. Tidier rooms. It means nothing that he’s here…in my room.
IN.MY.ROOM!!!
Oh god. Max Evans is in my room. And he’s SITTING ON MY BED.
I’m suddenly way too aware that the temperature is soaring, and how my hands are trembling as I search for my old notes. And I just knew that I should have taken that Enrique poster off my wall over a year ago. Around the time I decided that Max would be the guy that I married.
Except I never ever got around to really speaking to him much. So the whole marriage thing didn’t quite happen. Nor the part where he took me on the Angel boat on the water across the pier and proposed. Or when we discussed how many children we would one day have (2 girls and a boy by the way). Or when he kissed my neck, or undressed… stop.
I have to stop. I sound like a Harlequin running amuck.
Concentrating on the task at hand (Its hard stuff), I pull out my old note book from underneath a pile of others. I flip through a couple of pages, and sure enough there is lecture 5 of Ms Parson’s class, with notes scrawled neatly in my hand writing. I turn and walk toward the bed.
Max looks up from the world he always seems to be so lost in.
“So this was lecture 5. I’m not sure if you remember. We talked about Osmosis.”
I clear my throat because my voice has turned all weird and shaky.
He moves a little closer to look over my shoulder and my heart almost jumps into my throat.
“No.” he says.
I screw my eyes. “No?”
He shrugs. “I kinda have a short memory when it comes to Biology.”
He looks up from my shoulder and then straight into my eyes. I can see flecks of gold around his iris and I can’t seem to look away. “Can you explain… if you don’t mind?”
I hope that the adrenaline coursing through my veins isn’t going to kill me. Nowadays my body doesn’t take too well to sudden stress. But I manage a “Sure….” Before turning back to my notebook and taking a deep breath.
“Um, for this assignment we’ll probably just need the beginning and end part of the lecture. It’s important to remember that the net movement of solvent is from the less-concentrated to the more-concentrated solution…”
I begin explaining the process but for some reason I don’t think he’s listening to what I’m saying.
I’m glad because even I don’t know what I’m saying. I just hope it’s somewhat coherent.
I can feel his breath in my ear.
…is his body always so warm?
I wonder how Maria will react when I tell her that Max Evans shoulder ALMOST touched me.
“Do you get it?” I say after five minutes of explanation and without a peep from Max.
“Huh?”
“What I just mentioned about Osmotic pressure.”
Max blinks. “Totally. Thanks, Liz.”
“Sure.”
I close my book and right at that moment he leans forward. Our hands touch and in response my whole body trembles. My eyes jerk up to meet his. But in perfect timing an amazing cramp overtakes my body.
For a second I stop breathing and in that moment I think I see something like terror cross his features – just before I double over in pain.
“Christ.” There’s a movement beside me and I see that Max is standing over me. He looks shocked…?
When the pain resides. I can’t look at him. I just want to burrow myself underneath blankets, or drop through a hole in the floor.
Wow. That was just so embarrassing.
“I’m sorry. I just… that happens sometimes…” I say embarrassedly. “Sorry you had to witness that.”
Max doesn’t say anything. He takes one step toward me, and then moves away again before turning around and fleeing out of my room, freaked.
Without my notes.
***********
- Max-
I blink as the red of a strobe light hits my face. The rumble of the large, intertwined crowd and the heavy trance music molest my ears as I finally reach the beginnings of the party.
It wasn’t easy to find this place. If I wasn’t with Tess, I would have probably been forever lost in the dungeon like corridors we had to pass to get here. But it’s always like this at our parties. Our lot don’t take this privacy thing lightly.
The vibrations in the room are electric as I take in the atmosphere. I don’t normally come to these things but getting wasted seemed almost too attractive today.
I shield myself as I weave through the crowds, following the blonde in front of me. There are way too many open connections. Way too much room for poison.
Tess turns around and is mouthing something at me
“What?”
“You want a drink?!” She motions to her mouth with her hands.
I shrug. “Sure. Let me get it.”
She nods and follows me to the bar. Her hand is on my back as I crush myself between a couple of bodies. Some of them recognize me, and allow more room.
I notice she’s wearing black nail polish on one hand and red on the other as I turn toward her. “What do you want?”
She asks for beer. I turn back to the bar and ask for two of the same.
As I wait for my order, I feel a tugging at the back of my mind. Her aura projection is strong. I’m not surprised as she comes from the most powerful line of hybrids to exist. Pretty much on par with Isabel and I.
I can feel her cutting into the edges of my subconscious, even though I’ve shielded myself. She’s definitely not hiding that she’s attracted to me.
I pass her a bottle and I think about the vow that is expected between us. I heighten my block against her.
Tess takes a sip from her bottle and her shadowed blue eyes land on my face. “I don’t bite, Max,” she says coolly.
“You can never be careful enough.”
She rolls her eyes.
I take a swig of my drink and look around the floor. Nearly all the faces are familiar. Seen at one time or another during Gatherings, yet most names escape me. I see Michael not too far to my right. He’s caught in an intimate embrace with a long haired blonde. Out of habit, my eyes quickly scan the room for Isabel. I relax when I see her talking animatedly in the middle of a large crowd.
“You’re not going to do it, are you?”
I turn back to Tess. “Do what?”
“Take the vow”
I shrug uncaringly. “It’s tradition.”
She takes another sip of her drink, studying me.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
A couple of guys, who I recognize as sons of important figures at the council pass me. I nod at them in recognition.
Perhaps due to my lack of response, Tess moves closer to me. “It is tradition, Max – you come from a bloodline where it’s expected.”
“Well, they’re all dead now, aren’t they?”
Tess looks at me without reaction and then changes the topic like I hadn’t said anything at all.
“Do you like my tattoo? It’s new.”
I look down at her bare midriff, and just below a dark colored tattoo on her hip, jutting out sharply from beneath her pants. A scorpion.
It’s the oddest things I've ever seen. I can’t help but stare. It looks like its bulging in and out of her skin in tune to the music.
“It’s pretty cool.”
For some strange reason I’m oddly drawn to it. I move toward her and touch it with my index and middle fingers.
And suddenly flashes engulf my body. They are her thoughts, memories, experiences, her feelings toward me – mixed with mine. Their electric essence engulfs my spine. Sensation after sensation molests me. Some are painful to see, dark. Others are teasing, sensual. Nearly all are intrusive. I pull away breathing hard.
Fuck, Tess!
She throws her head backs and laughs. The remnants of flashes pierce my body and I have to struggle to sever the forced thread of connection.
Tess leans toward me, her lips almost touching mine. “Be careful, Max. This does bite.”
Something flashes in her eyes before she leans forward and kisses my nose like I’m a 2 year old kid and struts off. My eyes are the only ones that don’t follow her as she disappears somewhere into the large, humming crowd.
TBC
I am in a bit of a rush right now, but will be back later to answer any other questions. Thanks for reading.
Well, the image of Laurie in my head is the same girl from the show. I imagine her a little older than Max. Maybe 25 years old. Yes she is an alien. No she is not the future wife of Max. I guess you guys will get to know her a bit more as the story progresses.
As for why Max has issues with healing – it will be different from the show. More explanation soon!
Seeking Surrender
Chapter 3
[i-]Max-[/i]
“You know, it’s a good thing the food is good, otherwise I’d question why we keep ending up here.”
I pretend not to hear Michael’s innuendo filled, yet succinctly directed remark, as I chew on another fry and watch Maria and one other blonde waitress wrestle their way around customers in the much too crammed restaurant.
I didn’t realize that this place could get so busy.
Isabel rolls her eyes rather emphatically from beside him. “I think good is taking it a bit far. My burger is rare.” She sighs and rolls her eyes again.
Isabel’s eye roll thing is like a permanent tic that one needs get used to ignoring. Sometimes I think I’ve mastered it. Other times I just kinda want to tape her eyes closed.
“It looks fine to me,” Michael says in between mouthfuls of food. “Here tryphe phis.” He shoves a half eaten burger in her face.
“Gross Michael.” Isabel scrunches up her face in renewed disgust. “ I asked for well done, I hate rare” she sighs, and then seethes under her breath, “I can’t even ask her to come back because it will take her at least twenty minutes to notice me and another twenty to bring it back,…so,” she looks at me darkly, “why do keep ending up here?”
I shrug as I watch about ten more people file into the Crashdown. A couple of them are familiar faces. “Because the food is good?”
Isabel opens her mouth to retort back, but Maria flings herself at our table looking frustrated and breathless. It’s almost amusing.
“Hey. Hey guys. Is everything good?”
“No, actually---“ Isabel begins tartly.
“Good, good. Let me know if there is anything else you need. Ok?” Maria says, turning back to her circus of customers.
Isabel does the eye roll and gets up from her chair abruptly (or is it the other way around?). “I’m outta here.”
“Me too,” says Michael licking his fingers clean, and shoving back his chair. He turns to me with a sudden sombre expression on his face. “There’s a Gathering in half an hour, Max. Don’t forget –“
“Yeah, yeah yeah.” I brush him off. It’s not like the schedule isn’t inherently etched in my mind that I need yet another reminder.
They both leave and I watch Maria struggle with three sets of customers before I get up from my table, and silently follow her through the back door that she’s just disappeared through.
“Where’s that friggin’ ice cream scoop thing? Where did Agnes leave it? Shit. Shit. Shit! Where is….hey, there it is……Oh!” Maria takes a sudden step back and puts her hand over her heart in surprise when she notices me. “…er, you’re not allowed to be back here.” She says really fast.
“I know.” I say ominously.
More ominous because the truth is, it’s not really the food. I can’t explain why the hell I keep ending up here (and dragging Isabel and Michael with me). All I know is, I can’t get this place out of my mind. This of course does nothing to help the –lord help me, there’s a psycho stalker in the vicinity- look on Maria’s face.
“Okay then…” she points toward the door with a trembling finger.
Apparently I make people tremble.
Not wanting to cause a scene, I nod my head and then slowly, and rather moronically, turn around and start to walk toward the door. Maria takes a sudden step back when I turn back around, looking like she might scream.
I clear my throat.
“I was just wondering if you…you’d…” I gulp.
God, what the fuck is wrong with me? Out with it already.
Maria narrows her eyes. “If I’d….?”
My eyes shift to the counter. There’s chocolate powder there.
“Tried chocolate milk recently?”
“What?”
I clear my throat (if anyone hasn’t guessed, that wasn’t why I came back here either). “It tastes good.”
Maria clears her throat. “I’m sure it does….”
“Yeah…”
Silence.
Awkwardness.
Need to figure out personal issues (possibly not in that order).
“Okay well. “I smile widely, “I’m going to go.”
“Cool…” then she mumbles really quietly under her breath, “ Otherwise I’d have to get security to throw you out.”
“You guys have security?”
Maria mouth widens at the idea that I actually heard what she said. Supersensitive hearing comes with the whole alien package.
“I just say that to guys who are starting to freak …we don’t have security…. it’s just Alex… he’s not very…” She sighs, and says accusatorily, “You’ve been turning up a lot you know.”
“Really?” I say nonchalantly.
“Yes.” she gives me a hardened, suspicious look. One a parent might give their kid when they know they’ve been up to no good, but have no way to prove it.
I know my face is perfectly blank when I say, “I didn’t realize. I’ll try to cut it out.”
I turn around and walk back through the way I came in. I stand by the bathroom doors until Maria comes out and throws herself back into a throng of customers. Then I take the opportunity to make my way back in through the kitchen, through another door and up some stairs. As I walk past a master bedroom, the weird prickling begins in my chest, but it’s expected. And if I really give myself time to think about it, I also know that I’m treading extremely dangerous territory.
I walk on anyway.
I come to stop in front of another room. The door is slightly ajar. From where I stand I can see a double bed. There’s a desk opposite, laid with various accessories. Mainly school stuff and photos of her friends. Her room is smaller than mine, but also fuller. Then there’s a small click, and Liz walks out of the bathroom, dark hair covering delicate features and just like she knew I was here all along she turns and looks directly at me.
For a second, I see fear mask her features, but then her face changes to something soft.
“Max?” she bites her lip. Her voice quiet.
“Hi, Liz.” I move forward awkwardly.
“What are you doing here?”
I clear my throat and say the first thing that comes to mind. “About our assignment.”
“Oh.” She looks crestfallen.
Who wouldn’t be? The girl is dying. And I come here to ask her about a damned assignment.
Yes. That’s why I came…
…the assignment.
She’s looking at me questioningly beneath dark lashes.
“What about the assignment?” She moves her head sideways to get a clearer view of me.
I realize I am still standing behind the shadow of the door. Camouflage comes easy to me. I take a slight step forward, toward the boundary marking her room, but not quite inside yet. “I think I can do it myself.”
I think I see a hint of a smile. “Good.”
She awkwardly bites her lip again. They’re a perfect, full red contrasting against her pale, almost translucent skin.
“I just needed to borrow some of your old notes.”
“My old notes?... “ She smiles and fingers her desk. “I always wondered if you were concentrating really hard or asleep with your eyes open.”
“Most definitely asleep with my eyes open.”
She looks up at me like the answer was unexpected, and then breaks out into a laugh. And in that moment, just like that, all the tiredness and anxiety is wiped from her face. It stuns me and I try not to stare.
“Do you want to sit? My room is a bit of a mess.”
My eyes scan her room as I take a tentative step inside. I have no idea what she means when she says “mess”. It’s extraordinarily neat. I take two large steps forward, and the mattress shifts beneath my weight as I sit on the edge. Her room smells faintly of lavender and vanilla. I notice her duvet is brown and orange, covered with geometrical shapes. She has three posters on the wall. One of the Milky Way, another of Pleiades cluster and a third of…. Enrique Iglesias. My eyes turn back to the astronomy posters. I notice a telescope bundled at the corner of her room.
Her cheeks have blossomed a healthy pink when I turn to look at her. “It’s old. The poster is almost two years old. I kinda had a crush on him…and I need to take it down, um, let me find your notes.” She’s speaking really fast.
“Sure.” I cross my hands over my chest and sit awkwardly. Trying not to think about the fact that it would take me just 10 minutes to do this assignment if I really put my mind to it.
Without any notes whatsoever.
****
-Liz-
It’s weird how loud the roar of blood is in my ears despite the medication I’ve been taking. Usually it makes me so numb. But I guess the effect must be wearing off because I can’t remember the last time I reacted to someone this way.
It’s totally irrational.
I mean Max Evans is in my room. So what? I’m sure he’s been to other rooms. Better rooms. Tidier rooms. It means nothing that he’s here…in my room.
IN.MY.ROOM!!!
Oh god. Max Evans is in my room. And he’s SITTING ON MY BED.
I’m suddenly way too aware that the temperature is soaring, and how my hands are trembling as I search for my old notes. And I just knew that I should have taken that Enrique poster off my wall over a year ago. Around the time I decided that Max would be the guy that I married.
Except I never ever got around to really speaking to him much. So the whole marriage thing didn’t quite happen. Nor the part where he took me on the Angel boat on the water across the pier and proposed. Or when we discussed how many children we would one day have (2 girls and a boy by the way). Or when he kissed my neck, or undressed… stop.
I have to stop. I sound like a Harlequin running amuck.
Concentrating on the task at hand (Its hard stuff), I pull out my old note book from underneath a pile of others. I flip through a couple of pages, and sure enough there is lecture 5 of Ms Parson’s class, with notes scrawled neatly in my hand writing. I turn and walk toward the bed.
Max looks up from the world he always seems to be so lost in.
“So this was lecture 5. I’m not sure if you remember. We talked about Osmosis.”
I clear my throat because my voice has turned all weird and shaky.
He moves a little closer to look over my shoulder and my heart almost jumps into my throat.
“No.” he says.
I screw my eyes. “No?”
He shrugs. “I kinda have a short memory when it comes to Biology.”
He looks up from my shoulder and then straight into my eyes. I can see flecks of gold around his iris and I can’t seem to look away. “Can you explain… if you don’t mind?”
I hope that the adrenaline coursing through my veins isn’t going to kill me. Nowadays my body doesn’t take too well to sudden stress. But I manage a “Sure….” Before turning back to my notebook and taking a deep breath.
“Um, for this assignment we’ll probably just need the beginning and end part of the lecture. It’s important to remember that the net movement of solvent is from the less-concentrated to the more-concentrated solution…”
I begin explaining the process but for some reason I don’t think he’s listening to what I’m saying.
I’m glad because even I don’t know what I’m saying. I just hope it’s somewhat coherent.
I can feel his breath in my ear.
…is his body always so warm?
I wonder how Maria will react when I tell her that Max Evans shoulder ALMOST touched me.
“Do you get it?” I say after five minutes of explanation and without a peep from Max.
“Huh?”
“What I just mentioned about Osmotic pressure.”
Max blinks. “Totally. Thanks, Liz.”
“Sure.”
I close my book and right at that moment he leans forward. Our hands touch and in response my whole body trembles. My eyes jerk up to meet his. But in perfect timing an amazing cramp overtakes my body.
For a second I stop breathing and in that moment I think I see something like terror cross his features – just before I double over in pain.
“Christ.” There’s a movement beside me and I see that Max is standing over me. He looks shocked…?
When the pain resides. I can’t look at him. I just want to burrow myself underneath blankets, or drop through a hole in the floor.
Wow. That was just so embarrassing.
“I’m sorry. I just… that happens sometimes…” I say embarrassedly. “Sorry you had to witness that.”
Max doesn’t say anything. He takes one step toward me, and then moves away again before turning around and fleeing out of my room, freaked.
Without my notes.
***********
- Max-
I blink as the red of a strobe light hits my face. The rumble of the large, intertwined crowd and the heavy trance music molest my ears as I finally reach the beginnings of the party.
It wasn’t easy to find this place. If I wasn’t with Tess, I would have probably been forever lost in the dungeon like corridors we had to pass to get here. But it’s always like this at our parties. Our lot don’t take this privacy thing lightly.
The vibrations in the room are electric as I take in the atmosphere. I don’t normally come to these things but getting wasted seemed almost too attractive today.
I shield myself as I weave through the crowds, following the blonde in front of me. There are way too many open connections. Way too much room for poison.
Tess turns around and is mouthing something at me
“What?”
“You want a drink?!” She motions to her mouth with her hands.
I shrug. “Sure. Let me get it.”
She nods and follows me to the bar. Her hand is on my back as I crush myself between a couple of bodies. Some of them recognize me, and allow more room.
I notice she’s wearing black nail polish on one hand and red on the other as I turn toward her. “What do you want?”
She asks for beer. I turn back to the bar and ask for two of the same.
As I wait for my order, I feel a tugging at the back of my mind. Her aura projection is strong. I’m not surprised as she comes from the most powerful line of hybrids to exist. Pretty much on par with Isabel and I.
I can feel her cutting into the edges of my subconscious, even though I’ve shielded myself. She’s definitely not hiding that she’s attracted to me.
I pass her a bottle and I think about the vow that is expected between us. I heighten my block against her.
Tess takes a sip from her bottle and her shadowed blue eyes land on my face. “I don’t bite, Max,” she says coolly.
“You can never be careful enough.”
She rolls her eyes.
I take a swig of my drink and look around the floor. Nearly all the faces are familiar. Seen at one time or another during Gatherings, yet most names escape me. I see Michael not too far to my right. He’s caught in an intimate embrace with a long haired blonde. Out of habit, my eyes quickly scan the room for Isabel. I relax when I see her talking animatedly in the middle of a large crowd.
“You’re not going to do it, are you?”
I turn back to Tess. “Do what?”
“Take the vow”
I shrug uncaringly. “It’s tradition.”
She takes another sip of her drink, studying me.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
A couple of guys, who I recognize as sons of important figures at the council pass me. I nod at them in recognition.
Perhaps due to my lack of response, Tess moves closer to me. “It is tradition, Max – you come from a bloodline where it’s expected.”
“Well, they’re all dead now, aren’t they?”
Tess looks at me without reaction and then changes the topic like I hadn’t said anything at all.
“Do you like my tattoo? It’s new.”
I look down at her bare midriff, and just below a dark colored tattoo on her hip, jutting out sharply from beneath her pants. A scorpion.
It’s the oddest things I've ever seen. I can’t help but stare. It looks like its bulging in and out of her skin in tune to the music.
“It’s pretty cool.”
For some strange reason I’m oddly drawn to it. I move toward her and touch it with my index and middle fingers.
And suddenly flashes engulf my body. They are her thoughts, memories, experiences, her feelings toward me – mixed with mine. Their electric essence engulfs my spine. Sensation after sensation molests me. Some are painful to see, dark. Others are teasing, sensual. Nearly all are intrusive. I pull away breathing hard.
Fuck, Tess!
She throws her head backs and laughs. The remnants of flashes pierce my body and I have to struggle to sever the forced thread of connection.
Tess leans toward me, her lips almost touching mine. “Be careful, Max. This does bite.”
Something flashes in her eyes before she leans forward and kisses my nose like I’m a 2 year old kid and struts off. My eyes are the only ones that don’t follow her as she disappears somewhere into the large, humming crowd.
TBC
I am in a bit of a rush right now, but will be back later to answer any other questions. Thanks for reading.
Re: Seeking Surrender (M/L, chapter 3 , 10/04)
Thanks Laira. I know it’s all a little confusing but I hope that it’ll all become a little more clearer soonish. Otherwise you can kick me.
Wench on a leash: Yes, the Gatherings are where the Aliens go. I’m not sure if its been as obvious as I thought, but there is a whole community of aliens. They know about each other. They connect with each other. The Gatherings are where they learn more about themselves and have important people from the council attend. People in important positions at the council are generally there because they come from a “powerful” alien heritage so to say.
Twilighteyes: that’s for reading. Here your next fix
Bettylove8: Without giving away too much… it will be okay in the end…
Thumbelina: thanks for reading and hope you will continue to do so
Mezz: Yep, the aliens have slightly more dark undertones in this fic.
Twilight: Good observation. I think you could be right. I think Max might find it a little easier to “come into the light” when Liz is concerned!
Enjoy.
Seeking Surrender
Chapter 4:
-Isabel-
I stare down at my new nail colour in contemplation and then with a slight movement change the red crimson to a deep gold. Hmm. It could do with a little more oomph. I wave my hand and add glitter to the coat.
There. Perfect.
Pretty cool stuff, huh?
I’m always so comfortable at these Gatherings. Our place. Our sanctuary. Everyone is Alien. Powerful. Connected. And concentrating intently on the speaker up front. Although nowhere near as comfortable as Michael, of course.
For a change, Michael, Max, and I sit in the third row. The first row gives me neck cramps, but Michael insists on turning up 15 minutes early just so we can get that seat every single time. If he had a chance he would get those seats reserved and alarmed. Though he almost peed his pants when Max turned up late, again. I’m beginning to think Max does it on purpose. If I cared enough, I would be annoyed, too.
Daniel's words wash over me as I kneel down and shuffle in my bag for my compact mirror. He’s stopped bitching about “people of Earth” and now is talking about our special abilities and how we should keep them hidden from humans.
Geez.
His lectures are so predictable and over-done that I could give one myself.
Michael throws me an annoyed look as I shuffle some more. I give him a wide smile and then roll my eyes. I bet (if I ever cared to look) Daniel Montgomery would be tattooed on his ass. Inside a heart.
“Let’s look at healing for example,” Daniel says in his deep, booming voice. “It’s a rare quality possessed by very few of us. Yet the fact that we can cause real damage to ourselves when we heal others, shows that our abilities should not be used in vain. A healer has to live carefully. Temptation could actually kill him.”
I wonder what kind of temptation he’s actually talking about?
“Healing is difficult.” Daniel goes on, “Bringing that power to the fore, the amount of energy it takes from us is harmful to our own bodies. Our own lives…”
Despite his hammer-into-your-head- style, Daniels voice is surprisingly sexy.
It almost makes me look up. But instead I concentrate on opening my compact case. I stare down at my reflection. That one shade lighter hair colour totally suits me. Who needs all that extraordinary stuff? I love my ability. I turn my face to the side.The new lip colour looks great, too.
Michael nudges my arm and then leans toward me lethally, “If you don’t put that way now, I’ll smash every mirror that you have.”
What? “That’s the stupidest threat I have ever heard.” I say, annoyed.
“I’ll do it. I swear.”
“Ooh. I’m scared, Michael. Really.”
I shake my head but put my compact on the seat beside me anyway. He can be such a anally retentive freak sometimes.
I forget why I hang out with him and my moody faced brother so much.
“Let me remind you, my friends. We should use our powers carefully and with caution. It is important to not only protect yourselves but the others around you as well ….Thank you.”
I join in with the din of applause and look vaguely to my left. Max is sitting silent and statuesque, staring straight ahead with fists tightly clenched. Not clapping with the rest of us.
I poke him. “Are you okay?” I mouth.
His eyes flicker toward me and then without any change in expression, just like I don’t exist, he stares back at the stage as the applause dies down, where an older council member is taking his place.
I should be used to this by now, but I feel a weird pang of rejection deep inside my chest.
Max has never been an extremely affectionate kind. But he was never like this. Not until he found Mom and Emily…
I gulp and stare down at my finger nails and then wave my hand.
They turn back to their original colour.
Bright, attention seeking, crimson red.
****
“Where do you guys want to go?” Michael asks, letting the roof of his hatchback down.
“Anywhere,” I say from beside him, as he floors the gas pedal and I grip onto my seat so I don’t end up with my head through the dashboard. Then add, “that isn’t The Crashdown.”
Just so they know.
There’s no protest from the boys. Not even from Max, the ever reformed Crashdown addict.
I turn to look behind me. Max is looking like he did at the Gathering. Like he’s concentrating really hard whilst trying to get rid of a bad smell. It’s quite perturbing.
“You okay, Max?” I ask again. I should stop with the concern. I’m beginning to sound like a broken record.
“I was thinking…”
“I get scared when you do that.” Michael chortles, flipping on some sun glasses.
“…About Daniel Montgomery.”
“He’s good shit, right?” Michael says enthusiastically.
Seriously. Someone needs to check for that tattoo on his ass.
“I don’t know.”
“He’s a great speaker.” Michael says.
“I don’t quite agree with a lot of his stuff.”
“Like what?”
Max pauses, “That whole thing about keeping yourself hidden. About not healing because it could hurt you. I mean what if you had the power to really help someone? Save someone’s life? How could you just ignore it? Could you just walk past that?”
“Yes.” Michael says without hesitation, “We're only hum- we’re not God, Max. Shit happens. Stuff happens.”
“But what if somebody was really ill…What if they were a friend…. someone close? someone you loved even...?”
The conversation continues as I start to think about food and available restaurants in this extremely non happening town. I can only list two. Kinda sad, isn’t it?
“Let’s go to Senor Chows.” I say, finally making a decision.
Except no one's really listening. For some reason the conversation has gotten heated and weird.
“There’s a difference between wrong and right.” Max says from behind me, his jaws clenched vehemently.
“ Yes. It’s right to protect who we are. So that in five years time we aren’t living in a fucking zoo!” Michael says just as vehemently.
“It's life and death, Michael.”
“ And it’s our life on the line.”
Life and death…A sudden thought occurs to me. “Are you talking about Liz?” I blurt.
JESUS…!
I’m grabbing onto the dashboard for my fragile and dear life as Michael swerves suddenly and jerks the car to a shuddering stop on a hard shoulder.
What the hell?!
Just as I turn to yell at him, the utter fury on his face makes me stop. And that doesn’t happen often.
Michael yells instead. He’s really loud. It’s annoying.
“This is fucking insane!! Do you know the consequences we would have to face if you ever did something…If you ever healed her? First off, you know that healing others hurts you. If you didn’t fucking die, you have the council to deal with. Don’t you remember what happened to that O’ Reilly kid? He just disappeared. We could be in danger…. even she could be in danger.”
“He’s right, Max.” I say pointedly. “It’s too risky.”
“Fuck!” Michael bangs his hand against the steering wheel with force.
It makes me jump off my seat a little. Over dramatic, much?
I’m turn to look at Max. “You’re not going to do anything are you?”
Michael turns to add to my staring. Except it’s not so effective with sun glasses on.
“No. I’m not.” Max says finally.
“Jesus Christ, man. I can’t believe you would ever think that way.” Michaels says accusingly.
“I wasn’t.” Max looks straight at him. “I wouldn’t do something so careless.”
His voice is nonchalant. Honest. It makes me question my assumptions.
“Right.” Michael restarts the car, muttering to himself. I think he believes him.
I turn back to face the front, trying my best to control the pangs of fear thrumming through my chest.
I’m not so sure.
-Maria-
“Max is downstairs. In his usual booth. Staring at nothing. All silent and broody and… weird.”
I’m sitting on Liz’s bed, plaiting her hair. The more frail she becomes the more we regress to doing strange, girly things. Yesterday we were colouring in pictures of teddy bears in her old colouring book. Today I’m plaiting her hair and colouring her nails whilst seriously trying not to freak out.
I think it’s mainly the way her eyes seem to have sunk into her skull, that’s freaking me out. Or that she’s not taken a step outside her room for the last week. Or maybe because sometimes when we’re talking she spaces out for a really long time and then doesn’t seem to remember a thing. And even though she won’t mention it, I just know that she’s in constant pain. Even without those freaky cramps that get worse as she becomes more and more ill.
“I know.” She says.
I pause a little to address exactly what “she knows”.
“That he’s downstairs, or weird?”
“That he’s downstairs.”
“How do you know that?” I ask curiously.
“Isn’t he always here?” There's a pause as she turns her profile toward me and says rather adamantly, “And he’s not weird.”
“You always do that.”
“Do what?”
“Defend him.”
“I don’t!” she shakes her head as I tie a little bobble around the plait and then swivels around to face me, blushing immensely. “It’s just… he just… is a little private. I get that.”
I screw my eyes at her. The girl's got it so bad…
I bite my lip in contemplation.“He’s hiding something. I just know it. Some big, crazy secret.”
“Right. A big, crazy secret. Like what exactly?” She makes it sound like I’m insane.
I’m not insane. Despite what some customers at the Crashdown may claim.
A little paranoid sometimes, but definitely not insane. Really.
I shrug. “It could be anything. I don’t know, maybe he’s like a…”
Liz raises her brow at me.
A thousand different explanations go through my head. Then it hits me. “A drug dealer.”
It would totally explain his staring into space and the inability to answer any question without a 30 second delay.
“That explains it,” Liz looks at me in all seriousness. “Those nice cars, Isabel’s designer clothes, those huge houses that they live in.”
Wow. She’s got this figured out better than I have.
“Maybe Michael is a drug lord, and Max is his drug pimp and Isabel is just being initiated into this mafia clan which started during the prohibition and has its secret members planted all over the USA.” Liz goes on, “Oh hey!” her eyes widen as she leans closer to me for emphasis, “That’s probably why he followed you into the kitchen the other day. He was trying to sell you crack….”
“Okay. Enough. I get it, smart ass.” I scowl.
Liz smiles. “Cut him some slack, Maria. You know how his Mom died and stuff. I think it’s hard on him.”
“I know, but hell woman, you would think you guys are married… if I had my way I would get you two to –“
“Let’s not start that again.” Liz cuts me off fast.
“It’s just that…”
“Stop that. Please.”.
“Fine,” I bite my lip and just because I can’t help it say, “Remember that time in the gym when we saw him without a shirt and…”
“ Maria!!”
I start to giggle but Liz’s is all serious and something else… so I stop.
“Even thinking of something like that is ridiculous right now.”
My hear pangs at the way her voice breaks right at the end. I don’t want to push it with her. Not when it comes to this incredibly sensitive topic.
“Will you do me a favour, Maria?” Liz says after a few seconds of what seem like contemplation.
“Of course…”
Liz swerves around and starts to move off the bed. I cringe a little as I watch her gown stick to her ribs. “Wait. Where are you going?” I ask worriedly, my heart speeding in my chest. I hate when she starts making sudden movements like that. It makes me jittery.
“Chill. I wanted you to give some notes to Max…” her tone changes, “why do you look like that?”
“Like what?”
“Like I’m going to keel over and die any second.”
“I’m sorry.” I say apologetically. Then I follow her off the bed anyway and stand right by her side as she rummages through books on her desk.
Liz rolls her eyes. “Trust me. You’ll have some kind of sign before I do that and then we can say our goodbyes.”
“Liz, stop it!!” I cry, trying to calm down a weird suffocating feeling in my chest at her mention of goodbye. I didn’t ever want to think about that. No matter how close that moment was. “And why must I give him anything? Especially after he ran out on you. It was kinda rude. I don’t like him much.”
Liz narrows her eyes. “Maria, are you scared of Max?”
“No. No…. but what if he tries to pass me some more crack?”
“It’s just notes, Maria.”
I try not to wonder why she can’t do it herself and like she’s read my mind, her cheeks colour and she says, “I don’t want him to see me. Like this.”
"Oh." I mean, what am I meant to say to something like that?
Then just like God is playing some weird twisted joke, she grabs her stomach and hisses this indiscernible sound.
I count in my head.
She doesn’t like us to touch her when they happen. Normally her body cramps for about 7 seconds and then she gets back up looking as white as a sheet. Or just embarrassed.
“Ughhh!”
That’s almost 10 seconds.
15…
“Liz?” I ask worriedly.
Her head stays buried.
Oh god.
Oh my god.
“LIZ!”
My breath stops in my throat and I don’t even realise I’m screaming, when she falls to the floor and starts to convulse.
TBC
Wench on a leash: Yes, the Gatherings are where the Aliens go. I’m not sure if its been as obvious as I thought, but there is a whole community of aliens. They know about each other. They connect with each other. The Gatherings are where they learn more about themselves and have important people from the council attend. People in important positions at the council are generally there because they come from a “powerful” alien heritage so to say.
Twilighteyes: that’s for reading. Here your next fix
Bettylove8: Without giving away too much… it will be okay in the end…
Thumbelina: thanks for reading and hope you will continue to do so
Mezz: Yep, the aliens have slightly more dark undertones in this fic.
Twilight: Good observation. I think you could be right. I think Max might find it a little easier to “come into the light” when Liz is concerned!
Enjoy.
Seeking Surrender
Chapter 4:
-Isabel-
I stare down at my new nail colour in contemplation and then with a slight movement change the red crimson to a deep gold. Hmm. It could do with a little more oomph. I wave my hand and add glitter to the coat.
There. Perfect.
Pretty cool stuff, huh?
I’m always so comfortable at these Gatherings. Our place. Our sanctuary. Everyone is Alien. Powerful. Connected. And concentrating intently on the speaker up front. Although nowhere near as comfortable as Michael, of course.
For a change, Michael, Max, and I sit in the third row. The first row gives me neck cramps, but Michael insists on turning up 15 minutes early just so we can get that seat every single time. If he had a chance he would get those seats reserved and alarmed. Though he almost peed his pants when Max turned up late, again. I’m beginning to think Max does it on purpose. If I cared enough, I would be annoyed, too.
Daniel's words wash over me as I kneel down and shuffle in my bag for my compact mirror. He’s stopped bitching about “people of Earth” and now is talking about our special abilities and how we should keep them hidden from humans.
Geez.
His lectures are so predictable and over-done that I could give one myself.
Michael throws me an annoyed look as I shuffle some more. I give him a wide smile and then roll my eyes. I bet (if I ever cared to look) Daniel Montgomery would be tattooed on his ass. Inside a heart.
“Let’s look at healing for example,” Daniel says in his deep, booming voice. “It’s a rare quality possessed by very few of us. Yet the fact that we can cause real damage to ourselves when we heal others, shows that our abilities should not be used in vain. A healer has to live carefully. Temptation could actually kill him.”
I wonder what kind of temptation he’s actually talking about?
“Healing is difficult.” Daniel goes on, “Bringing that power to the fore, the amount of energy it takes from us is harmful to our own bodies. Our own lives…”
Despite his hammer-into-your-head- style, Daniels voice is surprisingly sexy.
It almost makes me look up. But instead I concentrate on opening my compact case. I stare down at my reflection. That one shade lighter hair colour totally suits me. Who needs all that extraordinary stuff? I love my ability. I turn my face to the side.The new lip colour looks great, too.
Michael nudges my arm and then leans toward me lethally, “If you don’t put that way now, I’ll smash every mirror that you have.”
What? “That’s the stupidest threat I have ever heard.” I say, annoyed.
“I’ll do it. I swear.”
“Ooh. I’m scared, Michael. Really.”
I shake my head but put my compact on the seat beside me anyway. He can be such a anally retentive freak sometimes.
I forget why I hang out with him and my moody faced brother so much.
“Let me remind you, my friends. We should use our powers carefully and with caution. It is important to not only protect yourselves but the others around you as well ….Thank you.”
I join in with the din of applause and look vaguely to my left. Max is sitting silent and statuesque, staring straight ahead with fists tightly clenched. Not clapping with the rest of us.
I poke him. “Are you okay?” I mouth.
His eyes flicker toward me and then without any change in expression, just like I don’t exist, he stares back at the stage as the applause dies down, where an older council member is taking his place.
I should be used to this by now, but I feel a weird pang of rejection deep inside my chest.
Max has never been an extremely affectionate kind. But he was never like this. Not until he found Mom and Emily…
I gulp and stare down at my finger nails and then wave my hand.
They turn back to their original colour.
Bright, attention seeking, crimson red.
****
“Where do you guys want to go?” Michael asks, letting the roof of his hatchback down.
“Anywhere,” I say from beside him, as he floors the gas pedal and I grip onto my seat so I don’t end up with my head through the dashboard. Then add, “that isn’t The Crashdown.”
Just so they know.
There’s no protest from the boys. Not even from Max, the ever reformed Crashdown addict.
I turn to look behind me. Max is looking like he did at the Gathering. Like he’s concentrating really hard whilst trying to get rid of a bad smell. It’s quite perturbing.
“You okay, Max?” I ask again. I should stop with the concern. I’m beginning to sound like a broken record.
“I was thinking…”
“I get scared when you do that.” Michael chortles, flipping on some sun glasses.
“…About Daniel Montgomery.”
“He’s good shit, right?” Michael says enthusiastically.
Seriously. Someone needs to check for that tattoo on his ass.
“I don’t know.”
“He’s a great speaker.” Michael says.
“I don’t quite agree with a lot of his stuff.”
“Like what?”
Max pauses, “That whole thing about keeping yourself hidden. About not healing because it could hurt you. I mean what if you had the power to really help someone? Save someone’s life? How could you just ignore it? Could you just walk past that?”
“Yes.” Michael says without hesitation, “We're only hum- we’re not God, Max. Shit happens. Stuff happens.”
“But what if somebody was really ill…What if they were a friend…. someone close? someone you loved even...?”
The conversation continues as I start to think about food and available restaurants in this extremely non happening town. I can only list two. Kinda sad, isn’t it?
“Let’s go to Senor Chows.” I say, finally making a decision.
Except no one's really listening. For some reason the conversation has gotten heated and weird.
“There’s a difference between wrong and right.” Max says from behind me, his jaws clenched vehemently.
“ Yes. It’s right to protect who we are. So that in five years time we aren’t living in a fucking zoo!” Michael says just as vehemently.
“It's life and death, Michael.”
“ And it’s our life on the line.”
Life and death…A sudden thought occurs to me. “Are you talking about Liz?” I blurt.
JESUS…!
I’m grabbing onto the dashboard for my fragile and dear life as Michael swerves suddenly and jerks the car to a shuddering stop on a hard shoulder.
What the hell?!
Just as I turn to yell at him, the utter fury on his face makes me stop. And that doesn’t happen often.
Michael yells instead. He’s really loud. It’s annoying.
“This is fucking insane!! Do you know the consequences we would have to face if you ever did something…If you ever healed her? First off, you know that healing others hurts you. If you didn’t fucking die, you have the council to deal with. Don’t you remember what happened to that O’ Reilly kid? He just disappeared. We could be in danger…. even she could be in danger.”
“He’s right, Max.” I say pointedly. “It’s too risky.”
“Fuck!” Michael bangs his hand against the steering wheel with force.
It makes me jump off my seat a little. Over dramatic, much?
I’m turn to look at Max. “You’re not going to do anything are you?”
Michael turns to add to my staring. Except it’s not so effective with sun glasses on.
“No. I’m not.” Max says finally.
“Jesus Christ, man. I can’t believe you would ever think that way.” Michaels says accusingly.
“I wasn’t.” Max looks straight at him. “I wouldn’t do something so careless.”
His voice is nonchalant. Honest. It makes me question my assumptions.
“Right.” Michael restarts the car, muttering to himself. I think he believes him.
I turn back to face the front, trying my best to control the pangs of fear thrumming through my chest.
I’m not so sure.
-Maria-
“Max is downstairs. In his usual booth. Staring at nothing. All silent and broody and… weird.”
I’m sitting on Liz’s bed, plaiting her hair. The more frail she becomes the more we regress to doing strange, girly things. Yesterday we were colouring in pictures of teddy bears in her old colouring book. Today I’m plaiting her hair and colouring her nails whilst seriously trying not to freak out.
I think it’s mainly the way her eyes seem to have sunk into her skull, that’s freaking me out. Or that she’s not taken a step outside her room for the last week. Or maybe because sometimes when we’re talking she spaces out for a really long time and then doesn’t seem to remember a thing. And even though she won’t mention it, I just know that she’s in constant pain. Even without those freaky cramps that get worse as she becomes more and more ill.
“I know.” She says.
I pause a little to address exactly what “she knows”.
“That he’s downstairs, or weird?”
“That he’s downstairs.”
“How do you know that?” I ask curiously.
“Isn’t he always here?” There's a pause as she turns her profile toward me and says rather adamantly, “And he’s not weird.”
“You always do that.”
“Do what?”
“Defend him.”
“I don’t!” she shakes her head as I tie a little bobble around the plait and then swivels around to face me, blushing immensely. “It’s just… he just… is a little private. I get that.”
I screw my eyes at her. The girl's got it so bad…
I bite my lip in contemplation.“He’s hiding something. I just know it. Some big, crazy secret.”
“Right. A big, crazy secret. Like what exactly?” She makes it sound like I’m insane.
I’m not insane. Despite what some customers at the Crashdown may claim.
A little paranoid sometimes, but definitely not insane. Really.
I shrug. “It could be anything. I don’t know, maybe he’s like a…”
Liz raises her brow at me.
A thousand different explanations go through my head. Then it hits me. “A drug dealer.”
It would totally explain his staring into space and the inability to answer any question without a 30 second delay.
“That explains it,” Liz looks at me in all seriousness. “Those nice cars, Isabel’s designer clothes, those huge houses that they live in.”
Wow. She’s got this figured out better than I have.
“Maybe Michael is a drug lord, and Max is his drug pimp and Isabel is just being initiated into this mafia clan which started during the prohibition and has its secret members planted all over the USA.” Liz goes on, “Oh hey!” her eyes widen as she leans closer to me for emphasis, “That’s probably why he followed you into the kitchen the other day. He was trying to sell you crack….”
“Okay. Enough. I get it, smart ass.” I scowl.
Liz smiles. “Cut him some slack, Maria. You know how his Mom died and stuff. I think it’s hard on him.”
“I know, but hell woman, you would think you guys are married… if I had my way I would get you two to –“
“Let’s not start that again.” Liz cuts me off fast.
“It’s just that…”
“Stop that. Please.”.
“Fine,” I bite my lip and just because I can’t help it say, “Remember that time in the gym when we saw him without a shirt and…”
“ Maria!!”
I start to giggle but Liz’s is all serious and something else… so I stop.
“Even thinking of something like that is ridiculous right now.”
My hear pangs at the way her voice breaks right at the end. I don’t want to push it with her. Not when it comes to this incredibly sensitive topic.
“Will you do me a favour, Maria?” Liz says after a few seconds of what seem like contemplation.
“Of course…”
Liz swerves around and starts to move off the bed. I cringe a little as I watch her gown stick to her ribs. “Wait. Where are you going?” I ask worriedly, my heart speeding in my chest. I hate when she starts making sudden movements like that. It makes me jittery.
“Chill. I wanted you to give some notes to Max…” her tone changes, “why do you look like that?”
“Like what?”
“Like I’m going to keel over and die any second.”
“I’m sorry.” I say apologetically. Then I follow her off the bed anyway and stand right by her side as she rummages through books on her desk.
Liz rolls her eyes. “Trust me. You’ll have some kind of sign before I do that and then we can say our goodbyes.”
“Liz, stop it!!” I cry, trying to calm down a weird suffocating feeling in my chest at her mention of goodbye. I didn’t ever want to think about that. No matter how close that moment was. “And why must I give him anything? Especially after he ran out on you. It was kinda rude. I don’t like him much.”
Liz narrows her eyes. “Maria, are you scared of Max?”
“No. No…. but what if he tries to pass me some more crack?”
“It’s just notes, Maria.”
I try not to wonder why she can’t do it herself and like she’s read my mind, her cheeks colour and she says, “I don’t want him to see me. Like this.”
"Oh." I mean, what am I meant to say to something like that?
Then just like God is playing some weird twisted joke, she grabs her stomach and hisses this indiscernible sound.
I count in my head.
She doesn’t like us to touch her when they happen. Normally her body cramps for about 7 seconds and then she gets back up looking as white as a sheet. Or just embarrassed.
“Ughhh!”
That’s almost 10 seconds.
15…
“Liz?” I ask worriedly.
Her head stays buried.
Oh god.
Oh my god.
“LIZ!”
My breath stops in my throat and I don’t even realise I’m screaming, when she falls to the floor and starts to convulse.
TBC
Last edited by Blue*Soul on Mon Oct 13, 2008 2:31 pm, edited 4 times in total.
Re: Seeking Surrender (M/L, chapter 4, 10/13)
Morning Dreamgirl: *wave* welcome back. Laira: Really? I have to wait that long? 
bettylove8: I love how observant you are. It’s great when someone notices the subtleties! Wench on a Leash: almost right…, cocopucks: Thanks, I love writing the aliens, alien614: for some reason I though of Indiana jones, when you said that haha, I don’t know why. Natalie36, destiny c thanks for reading. twilight: oh yes, Isabelll. I think the girls got her own crap to deal with…but more of that later! ShatteredDreamer: I think you could be right! Twilighteyes: I’m back! Also thanks to my beta Smac for getting back to me so soon.
…this is the turning point in this fic I guess. It came a bit faster than anticipated, but most of these scenes was already written before I started this fic..well in my head anyway. Coldplay (Fix You and Speed of Sound) were inspirations for setting the tempo for this chapter.
Chapter 5
Seeking Surrender
-Max-
9.30 pm
It’s not my problem.
That’s the conclusion I come to as I sit in my shadowed bedroom, staring at the blank wall in front of me. It’s utterly quiet apart from the steady hum of my computer and the occasional car driving past.
It’s not like I could help her even if I wanted.
I heard the screaming before the others did. That was my greatest moment of weakness. I ran through the kitchen and half way up the stairs, but Jeff pushed past, barely noticing me in his flustered state, and I stumbled backward.
That gave me half a second to think. It was enough. I stepped back then and without another thought, I turned and walked away. Past the worried looking waitresses at the Crashdown, past a couple of remaining customers that looked uncomfortable at all the havoc, past the blaring sirens that lit up the night sky as the ambulance arrived.
I snuck into readying dusk, took in the smell of the salt sky and told my self just that… it’s not my problem.
It’s a pity, of course. She was a sweet girl. Kind…. almost too kind. She had this way about her. An open soul, I could almost read every thought reflected in her eyes... sitting next to her in Biology made me feel bad… evil even.
But shit happens, right?
Annabel and Justin Lui’s mother died this month, last year.
She had lung cancer. I accidently brushed her arm at a party once, and I knew what was breeding inside her two weeks before she was diagnosed. It was hard, knowing that at some point they wouldn’t come to school smiling anymore. That Annabel would never quite have that undying faith in things ending up good in the end, and that Justin’s enthusiasm would lilt into something else. And I just watched. Pretending, uncaring, silent…. it wasn’t my problem.
Travis Walker’s brother, Aaron became a fatality in a car crash three months ago. It was one of the biggest tragedies to hit Roswell in a long time. Aaron was a type you don’t come across too often,…a good guy. A deputy, that really cared about our small town. He never flaunted his authority like other policemen. He was lax with us kids, sometimes letting us off because he knew it would cause us more harm than good. I watched him bleed to death in front of my eyes. And I didn’t do a thing.
Then there was Mom and Emily, too….
So getting over Liz Parker wouldn’t be so bad. She’s just another one to add to the list. Another one I couldn’t…shouldn’t save. After all, its not my problem.
I swallow. It does nothing to counter the metallic feeling on my tongue. I realise it’s because I’ve bitten my tongue, it’s bleeding.
Not my problem.
I fall back onto my bed and close my eyes.
Tomorrow would just be another day.
11:55pm.
How did I ever sleep with that fricking racket?
I grind my teeth as the ticking of the clock becomes louder, almost unbearable to my ears.
If it doesn’t stop I’m going to rip that thing off the wall and throw it out of the window.
It doesn’t stop.
I jerk up on my bed and am about to run across and act out my aggressive tendencies but then I hear my Dads brother- Jim move into his room.
Calm yourself, Max.
I think of Laurie, and how she would coach me, when sometimes it was just too hard to breathe.
1, 2…breath….4, 5…breath….just like that. Keep it going. Concentrate….breath.
I’m almost as worked up as I used to be.
I pause and close my eyes tighter. Like somehow it might help sleep come easier.
11:57
Will I ever be able to sleep again?
Closing my eyes as tight as I can doesn’t help. Staring at nothing doesn’t either.
Counting sheep never has.
With a groan I sit up and fall to the floor beside my bed.
12:00am
My body protests as I continue to sit up, yet I go on without slowing.
One sixty two….sixty three….sixty four….. sixty….five….one sixty seven….
Sweat drips from my brow and I bite my lip hard. Waiting… prayingfor that point of exhaustion.
1.00am
I stand against the open window and blow the smoke out from my lungs. When I’m done I let the cigarette butt fall from my fingers and let the breeze molest my face. My body is achingly numb. And that annoying prickling sensation is back. It creeps up my stomach and envelopes my chest.
What the fuck is that?
I bury it to the back of my mind.
My eyes flick toward the ricocheting clock. This is getting ridiculous. It’s beyond ridiculous. This is …no words.
Fuck this.
Irritably, I throw myself on my desk, and move my mouse. The screen blinks in front of me and a soft glow engulfs my room.
I type in “osmosis”. No time like the present to get this crap outta the way.
2.05am:
I hear the front door clang as Isabel arrives. I pause typing so she doesn’t hear me. Her footsteps pass to her room and I continue again.
2.30am:
Dying bodies. On the kitchen floor.
Some bastard just left them there.
Mom. My baby sister, Emily….Why is it that every time I see her she’s more beautiful than before? Her hair is even darker., longer. Has she grown?
Without thought I move toward them.
I want to heal them… I should heal them… can I heal them?
I know it’s a dream. But I do it anyway. I lean over their bodies. “Emily…” I say softly, “Emily, can you look at me? Concentrate. Look at me.”
Her dark eyes move toward my face, but zombie like, they see nothing. I should know that it’s pointless, but I press my hand over her bloody chest anyway. I let the pain wash over me, engulfs me. Her pain, her confusion, her life ebbing away.
It’s overwhelming. I can’t breathe. I can’t see. I feel our connection weakening.
NO!...no….not again….
Suddenly I’m weak, tired. Hopeless. Sorry.
…God, I’m so sorry.
Wetness runs down my face.
It’s behind me this time.
That soft flicker, becoming steadily brighter in my peripheral vision. I move back through the door I came from. Away from the bodies… toward the brightness, warmth, the light. I can feel its heat and strength. My heart starts to thump in my chest as I run toward the second door in front of me. Running with all the strength and vitality that I have. Reaching, hoping….
The door opens. There she is.
My eyes fly open.
“Fuck!”
Like someone’s stung me, I jerk up, wide awake and the computer keyboard, where my head rested a second ago, flies to the floor with a loud clang.
Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!!!!
My heart is already in overdrive as I scramble about in the dark. Prickling all over my body. Limbs, wires, clothes are meddled and confused. Yet there’s no confusion in my mind. No question. I know what I have to do. Without any doubt, I just know.
I know.
Ignoring the stiffness in my neck and the absolute racket I’m making, I reach for my shirt somewhere across the floor. I trip over some clothes in the dark as I struggle to throw it over my head.
Can I make it on time? Am I too late? What if….no….somehow I know that I’m not.
I can’t be.
“Max?” Isabel peers from my outside door and then her eyes turn into saucers of shock as they adjust.
Well… at least I won’t have to explain.
She closes the door behind her and switches on the light. I ignore the sting of brightness as I throw my jacket over my shoulder and like a man with purpose move toward my window.
“Where are you…” she’s breathless as she watches my movement, “no Max, no… you can’t!”
But I have to.
“Max…please.” She whispers fearfully as I throw one leg out of the window. Yet she doesn’t make a move to stop me.
My eyes meet her shaken appearance. She’s scared of what it might do to me. That this might be the last time I see her. “I have to save her, Iz.” It’s an unspoken apology for my selfishness, and then I throw my foot onto the ledge before pulling myself onto the rooftop.
The frozen air slashes my face as I stand to fight. My fists clench and unclench by my side as I turn to the West, the buildings of Roswell like ghosted shadows beneath me. My heart pumps hard in my chest as I get ready to face the night ahead of me, my body rocks with adrenaline as I jog toward the end of the roof and let myself down by grasping for the drainpipe, vines and empty holes in the wall. My feet hit the hard pavement with a thud and then I turn around and run.
The wind blinds, numbs and pushes ferociously against me as I run past building after dead building.
How long do I have left? Hours?... minutes? Less? I know it’s not long. I don’t know how I know that.
I run like I’ve never run before. With a vitality that’s never touched my body before. I run against the protest of my knee, the protest of my aching muscles. The wind slices my face, tears from the cold escape from my eyes and freezing on my cheek. Angry breaths escape my lips, yet I’m not breathing at all. I run.
I trip. A stone or some can that someone’s left on the pavement throws me off balance. My bad knee hits the ground. Angry, relentless pain shoots through my body, and I cry out in pain.
“You okay, man?” A tramp peers at me from beneath his sleeping bag.
My fists clench against the pavement and I push at the gritty ground, and then I’m breaking into a run again.
Ignoring my protesting knee, the pain in my chest, the fire in my lungs, I run.
***
-Nurse Downing-
“Hold on, hold on.” I groan taking a sip of my coffee, sighing at night-cam as someone presses the buzzer persistently. It’s a young boy. He presses the buzzer again and then jumps up at the camera waving straight at me from the screen. Someone’s impatient.
I put down my coffee, and press the button. “No visitors…” I begin.
“Liz Parker.” Says the frantic voice.
Oh. … I buzz him in.
“Liz… Parker…” . He jogs toward me, looking anxious . Almost crazy. Why is he breathing so hard? How far did he run…? “I…need….”
“Sorry son, I’m afraid I can’t let any visitors in at this time,” I say catching his bedraggled appearance. He’s definitely not a relative. “Maybe tomorrow,… if…” she’s still alive. I doubted it though.
“No.” He’s adamant.
“Are you a relative?” I ask impatiently. Its almost 3 in the morning. I don’t want to be dealing with this.
He shakes his head, breathing hard.
“Then I’m sorry, I can’t allow you in, unless you come with a relative.”
“P..Please..” he says breathlessly leaning against the counter holding onto his stomach. He looks pale.
“Are you okay?”
He bangs his fist against the counter and papers fly everywhere. “ DAMN IT, TELL ME WHERE SHE IS!!”
Whoa.
I purse my lips. “I’m going to have to ask you to—“
What the hell?!!
Suddenly my chair is sliding backward, despite me dragging my feet across the floor it doesn’t stop. I gasp as I try to get up. I can’t. I’m stuck?
I watch in shock, as his hands move over my papers and without even looking at them he sets off toward the lift like his life depends on it.
He disappears.
Shakily, I get up from my chair and then I press the alarm button underneath my desk.
****
There’s a clear ping as the lift ascends upward. Second floor. She has her own room. That’s good.
Jeff’s memories go through my mind, as he stood at the front desk not so long ago. Asking for more morphine as Liz screamed in pain. Nancy crying, Maria sobbing. His thoughts… not long…not long until she would peaceful. Not long until she would be more comfortable…He hoped it would be sooner rather than later…
He wanted her to die? I try not to think of the utter despair that could break a father like that.
I close my eyes. Breathe Max. Breathe…. It’ll be okay. You’re almost there now. Almost there.
The lift pings and doors open. My nostrils sting from the sterile smell. A plaque, with an arrow to my right says room 201 - 209A . I half jog, half limp to the right, pausing before I round the corner. With flashes of Jeff’s memories still firmly imprinted, I can tell this is the right place. I hear a murmur of voices from the other side of the wall and I press my body against the brick to observe from my hiding place .
Great. A whole crowd of people are congregated outside Liz’s room. The people I recognize include Alex, Jeff, and Liz’s Grandmother. There’s also a nurse, and some guy. Probably the doctor on call. A shadow appears from the darkened room. It’s Liz’s mom, Nancy.
“I need water.” She says weakly. Her skin looks pale and she’s shaking. Jeff looks toward the door. “Maria’s in there,” Nancy’s voice cracks. Jeff takes his wife’s arm worriedly and they walk away toward their left.
I wait, impatient.
A few seconds later Maria appears. Her eyes are red rimmed and unfocused. She takes a single step outside, throws her hand against her mouth and lets out a small, broken sob.
“Oh, sweetheart.” Liz’s grandmother moves toward Maria and embraces her. Alex is there in an instant, his arms around both of them. Covering them as they mumble and sob quietly.
My eyes flick to the two unknowns. The nurse and the doctor are talking quietly amongst themselves, moving further and further to the left, they turn a corner to talk in more privacy. Sensing a now or never opportunity I move from my hiding place and silently walk past Alex, Maria and Liz’s Grandmother into Liz’s room. Swiftly, I close the door behind, hearing the soft click, I wave my hand over the metal handle, sealing it.
I turn. Her hair is sprayed on the pillow behind, various tubes and lines poke out of her arms. The room is almost completely dark apart from a small lamp highlighting Liz and the wall behind her. The glow of the lamp accentuates her fragility, the shadows under her eyes. My eyes drop to her face, and I can’t help but be mesmerised at how unearthly she looks. Strangely beautiful. The ECG monitor makes a funny beeping sound, and I’m shaken back to reality.
Already there’s shuffling outside. “Did Jeff go back in?” Maria asks, sounding confused.
I don’t have much time.
The ECG beeps again, and Liz’s body trembles as the lines goes flat. That dreaded noise - the sound of death. My heart stops, and everything is slow motion as my eyes flick toward the screen where a single flat, green line moves across it.
Is this it?
Five seconds later, the line spikes upward really fast.
……….
I exhale a large lungful of air that I didn’t know I was holding as the ECG resumes normally, and then move forward with a sense of urgency. I’m shaking.
She has to look at me for this to work.
God, I hope she can still look at me…
“Liz?” I whisper as I move toward her.
Open your eyes. Please open your eyes….Come on…come on…
“Alex, do you know if Jeff is in there?” Someone says from outside.
“Liz…” I say more urgently from beside her.
Her eyes flicker.
Yes. That’s it. That’s it. Come on…
More beeping from the monitor as she blinks, looks up at me and without any surprise at all, says “Hi.”
Hi.
I don’t know how I manage it, but I smile.
I know that time’s running out. I can almost feel the tension palpitating from outside the door and I also know that any second, the inevitable could happen and I might not be of any use at all. I might not be of any use anyway…. yet, I can’t help those few moments that I stand next to her bedside and stare. Like she’s some type of miracle. Like if I touch her, she might just disappear. I almost forget the reason why I came in the first place.
Liz looks back at me, only understanding in her rich, brown eyes. How could she understand this? Even I don’t….
….With dawning realization, I know why it was so hard to be around her at school. Why avoidance was the best cure.
Her eyes flicker again and then in an extremely drowsy voice she says the strangest thing. “I was wondering when you were going to come.”
What? Before I can ponder what she means or if she’s too drugged to even know anymore, someone tries the door handle.
“Hey, the doors locked…” It’s Alex.
Liz’s eyes close and then there’s a three second flat line before another spike.
Shit. What the hell am I doing?
“Liz?” I ask desperately.
She opens her eyes weakly and I breathe again.
“Liz, can you look at me? I won’t be long… try and concentrate. Keep your eyes on me.” I say softly.
Her eyes move toward my face. Tired eyes, wide with trust. I lower the blanket from around her body, shoving it past her knees. Her body is limp and lifeless, her gown is thin. I can feel the lead like cold of her body as I place my hands above her ribs where I saw tumours were most developed when I caught her falling at school.
“Maybe it’s the doctor?!” Marias almost screaming as she tries the handle too. Once. Twice.
My eyes shift to the door.
To think I could have done this in the privacy of her room. Weeks ago, I could have healed her, But instead I chose to put her in danger… and through all this pain. All the pain she must be going through…
“…Max?” Liz says raspily. Her breathing is laboured. She’s struggling to keep eye contact. The monitor show’s uneven, fast heart beats.
Jesus….Concentrate, Max. Concentrate.
More discomfort outside. “What’s going on?” Jeff’s voice.
Oh. Crap.
Clearing my mind, I focus fully on the girl in front of me. I haven't done this for a long, long time but I’m determined to get it right. I won’t fail.
I can’t fail, again.
I allow the warmth from my body to gather in one place, gathering everything I have, every single ounce of energy in my bones, my body, my blood. I turn to face her, my eyes connecting with hers, trying to forge a connection.
That familiar tingling, prickling sensation in my back, my shoulders. It’s out of control, sharp, stinging.
Liz is looking at me, her eyes narrowed with concentration, taking in large gasps of air. I feel her pull, her aura, her energy. It’s weakening with every passing second.
You can do this, Max. You can do this….
Letting all the resistance from my body and my shoulders disappear, I project. My palm heats and fingers tingle. Like millions of bee’s swarming around me, the pinpricking feeling is not just in my chest anymore, it’s all over my body.
“Why is the door locked?!” Frantic knocking turns into banging.
My body starts to buzz, waves of luminous, illusionary colour surround me as I block out everything else and concentrate on the task at hand. I gather more and more of my energy and let it slide like a warm flow of electric from my hand. I press harder against her ribs, letting the warmth spread.
Then I see it -the disease in her body. It’s spread so far. Her stomach, pancreas, her blood, even some of her bones. It’s eating her alive, causing her heart to malfunction. Then, like penance for my sins, without a single warning, every single ounce of pain she has ever felt hits me at once. Without a single shot of morphine in my blood, I gasp out loud. The pain is fucking excruciating.
“Somebody’s in there.”
“Who was that? Hey!! Open the door! Get someone… who…?”
My eyes roll back in my head but I hold my ground. I can feel it working. I can feel the change in her body, the poisonous cells dispersing, disappearing, being eliminated under the heat of my hand.
Every single cell I eliminate, echoes through my body, like it’s trying to manifest itself in my own body, in my soul. Clawing, poisoning, knifing at me. I move over her body, carefully, destroying anything that dares get in my way, that dares to stop me. There’s only one goal. And I’m going to reach it, no matter what the consequence.
Flashes engulf me. Some of her memories, mainly her pain, her cramps. Her wondering at when it would all end. My memories mingle with hers. Normally, I would try to shield, but I’m too weak to stop them intertwining, weaving. The connection is too vibrant, too strong. It’s leading me now.
“WHO’S IN HERE?” Loud thumping, more shoving against the door.
I start to shake with effort. Warm liquid falls from my brow. Liz and Maria giggling as four years old…something about play dough…, Liz concentrating hard on her Science project, taking utmost pride in her work, Liz’s first kiss…it was Kyle? Liz glancing at me sideways in Biology, curious.
As her heartbeat becomes stronger, Liz’s eyes focus and then widen in confusion.
Liz’s joy everytime her grandmother visited, Liz’s pain when she saw Travis suffer after his brothers death, her regret for all those people she couldn’t help… her guilt at not being able to do our assignment.
“Max?”
Her voice is louder, clearer. That’s good. Her eyes haven’t left mine since I started, and I’m struggling to hold on.
The pain is unbearable. Vomit and something else….blood? moves up my throat, but I push it back down, relentless in my concentration, heat mingling, focusing on her blood becoming smoother, cleaner.
The hammering and yelling outside is agonizingly loud. More and more voices crowd the corridor and someone slams the weight of their body into the door. It trembles under the pressure.
Something else in Liz’s memories catches my attention…Really? …. I never knew she saw me in that way…..
At the same time, Liz’s eyes are wide, realization dawning in her eyes. “Oh…my…god…” she gasps.
I’m not exactly sure what she sees. I don’t have any control over it. Does she see my Mom, Emily…my pain at not being able to heal? Every single secret I’ve worked so hard to hide… ? What about Isabel and Michael’s secrets? The secrets of the dangerous world that we live in? I don’t know, I can’t tell, but I’ve laid myself bare.
I groan out loud, my eye sight blurring with the pain. I can’t feel the prickling sensation, now. It’s all just raw, excruciating fire and pain.
Liz is on her elbows. Her large, questioning eyes still probing mine.”Max?”
I’m gasping hard. Trying to ease the burning with a lungfuls of air. I can barely see her. I wave my hand over her body one more time, rechecking.
She’s okay.
She’s okay.
I’m stumbling away. My own body shaking with tiny convulsions, lips stinging, throat parched…the fire is congregating in my stomach. I think I’m going to throw up. Blood. I can taste blood.
“Max…!” Liz cries again, sitting up, her eyes shocked, round, confused.
I wipe away the tickle of blood from my nose, “Shh,” I manage.” Please…just… shhh….”
She stares at me from her upright position, but doesn’t say another word. Her ward door continues to shudder with screams and combined weight. But Liz stares at me like she isn’t hearing the noise outside, watching as I fall against the back wall and reach shakily for the window.
I can barely see, or breath, or think. All I know is survival instinct. I need to get out, before they get in.
With one last glance at her, I grab the ledge and hoist myself over the edge of the window and stumble as far as I can, before darkness overtakes me.
TBC
bettylove8: I love how observant you are. It’s great when someone notices the subtleties! Wench on a Leash: almost right…, cocopucks: Thanks, I love writing the aliens, alien614: for some reason I though of Indiana jones, when you said that haha, I don’t know why. Natalie36, destiny c thanks for reading. twilight: oh yes, Isabelll. I think the girls got her own crap to deal with…but more of that later! ShatteredDreamer: I think you could be right! Twilighteyes: I’m back! Also thanks to my beta Smac for getting back to me so soon.…this is the turning point in this fic I guess. It came a bit faster than anticipated, but most of these scenes was already written before I started this fic..well in my head anyway. Coldplay (Fix You and Speed of Sound) were inspirations for setting the tempo for this chapter.
Chapter 5
Seeking Surrender
-Max-
9.30 pm
It’s not my problem.
That’s the conclusion I come to as I sit in my shadowed bedroom, staring at the blank wall in front of me. It’s utterly quiet apart from the steady hum of my computer and the occasional car driving past.
It’s not like I could help her even if I wanted.
I heard the screaming before the others did. That was my greatest moment of weakness. I ran through the kitchen and half way up the stairs, but Jeff pushed past, barely noticing me in his flustered state, and I stumbled backward.
That gave me half a second to think. It was enough. I stepped back then and without another thought, I turned and walked away. Past the worried looking waitresses at the Crashdown, past a couple of remaining customers that looked uncomfortable at all the havoc, past the blaring sirens that lit up the night sky as the ambulance arrived.
I snuck into readying dusk, took in the smell of the salt sky and told my self just that… it’s not my problem.
It’s a pity, of course. She was a sweet girl. Kind…. almost too kind. She had this way about her. An open soul, I could almost read every thought reflected in her eyes... sitting next to her in Biology made me feel bad… evil even.
But shit happens, right?
Annabel and Justin Lui’s mother died this month, last year.
She had lung cancer. I accidently brushed her arm at a party once, and I knew what was breeding inside her two weeks before she was diagnosed. It was hard, knowing that at some point they wouldn’t come to school smiling anymore. That Annabel would never quite have that undying faith in things ending up good in the end, and that Justin’s enthusiasm would lilt into something else. And I just watched. Pretending, uncaring, silent…. it wasn’t my problem.
Travis Walker’s brother, Aaron became a fatality in a car crash three months ago. It was one of the biggest tragedies to hit Roswell in a long time. Aaron was a type you don’t come across too often,…a good guy. A deputy, that really cared about our small town. He never flaunted his authority like other policemen. He was lax with us kids, sometimes letting us off because he knew it would cause us more harm than good. I watched him bleed to death in front of my eyes. And I didn’t do a thing.
Then there was Mom and Emily, too….
So getting over Liz Parker wouldn’t be so bad. She’s just another one to add to the list. Another one I couldn’t…shouldn’t save. After all, its not my problem.
I swallow. It does nothing to counter the metallic feeling on my tongue. I realise it’s because I’ve bitten my tongue, it’s bleeding.
Not my problem.
I fall back onto my bed and close my eyes.
Tomorrow would just be another day.
11:55pm.
How did I ever sleep with that fricking racket?
I grind my teeth as the ticking of the clock becomes louder, almost unbearable to my ears.
If it doesn’t stop I’m going to rip that thing off the wall and throw it out of the window.
It doesn’t stop.
I jerk up on my bed and am about to run across and act out my aggressive tendencies but then I hear my Dads brother- Jim move into his room.
Calm yourself, Max.
I think of Laurie, and how she would coach me, when sometimes it was just too hard to breathe.
1, 2…breath….4, 5…breath….just like that. Keep it going. Concentrate….breath.
I’m almost as worked up as I used to be.
I pause and close my eyes tighter. Like somehow it might help sleep come easier.
11:57
Will I ever be able to sleep again?
Closing my eyes as tight as I can doesn’t help. Staring at nothing doesn’t either.
Counting sheep never has.
With a groan I sit up and fall to the floor beside my bed.
12:00am
My body protests as I continue to sit up, yet I go on without slowing.
One sixty two….sixty three….sixty four….. sixty….five….one sixty seven….
Sweat drips from my brow and I bite my lip hard. Waiting… prayingfor that point of exhaustion.
1.00am
I stand against the open window and blow the smoke out from my lungs. When I’m done I let the cigarette butt fall from my fingers and let the breeze molest my face. My body is achingly numb. And that annoying prickling sensation is back. It creeps up my stomach and envelopes my chest.
What the fuck is that?
I bury it to the back of my mind.
My eyes flick toward the ricocheting clock. This is getting ridiculous. It’s beyond ridiculous. This is …no words.
Fuck this.
Irritably, I throw myself on my desk, and move my mouse. The screen blinks in front of me and a soft glow engulfs my room.
I type in “osmosis”. No time like the present to get this crap outta the way.
2.05am:
I hear the front door clang as Isabel arrives. I pause typing so she doesn’t hear me. Her footsteps pass to her room and I continue again.
2.30am:
Dying bodies. On the kitchen floor.
Some bastard just left them there.
Mom. My baby sister, Emily….Why is it that every time I see her she’s more beautiful than before? Her hair is even darker., longer. Has she grown?
Without thought I move toward them.
I want to heal them… I should heal them… can I heal them?
I know it’s a dream. But I do it anyway. I lean over their bodies. “Emily…” I say softly, “Emily, can you look at me? Concentrate. Look at me.”
Her dark eyes move toward my face, but zombie like, they see nothing. I should know that it’s pointless, but I press my hand over her bloody chest anyway. I let the pain wash over me, engulfs me. Her pain, her confusion, her life ebbing away.
It’s overwhelming. I can’t breathe. I can’t see. I feel our connection weakening.
NO!...no….not again….
Suddenly I’m weak, tired. Hopeless. Sorry.
…God, I’m so sorry.
Wetness runs down my face.
It’s behind me this time.
That soft flicker, becoming steadily brighter in my peripheral vision. I move back through the door I came from. Away from the bodies… toward the brightness, warmth, the light. I can feel its heat and strength. My heart starts to thump in my chest as I run toward the second door in front of me. Running with all the strength and vitality that I have. Reaching, hoping….
The door opens. There she is.
My eyes fly open.
“Fuck!”
Like someone’s stung me, I jerk up, wide awake and the computer keyboard, where my head rested a second ago, flies to the floor with a loud clang.
Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!!!!
My heart is already in overdrive as I scramble about in the dark. Prickling all over my body. Limbs, wires, clothes are meddled and confused. Yet there’s no confusion in my mind. No question. I know what I have to do. Without any doubt, I just know.
I know.
Ignoring the stiffness in my neck and the absolute racket I’m making, I reach for my shirt somewhere across the floor. I trip over some clothes in the dark as I struggle to throw it over my head.
Can I make it on time? Am I too late? What if….no….somehow I know that I’m not.
I can’t be.
“Max?” Isabel peers from my outside door and then her eyes turn into saucers of shock as they adjust.
Well… at least I won’t have to explain.
She closes the door behind her and switches on the light. I ignore the sting of brightness as I throw my jacket over my shoulder and like a man with purpose move toward my window.
“Where are you…” she’s breathless as she watches my movement, “no Max, no… you can’t!”
But I have to.
“Max…please.” She whispers fearfully as I throw one leg out of the window. Yet she doesn’t make a move to stop me.
My eyes meet her shaken appearance. She’s scared of what it might do to me. That this might be the last time I see her. “I have to save her, Iz.” It’s an unspoken apology for my selfishness, and then I throw my foot onto the ledge before pulling myself onto the rooftop.
The frozen air slashes my face as I stand to fight. My fists clench and unclench by my side as I turn to the West, the buildings of Roswell like ghosted shadows beneath me. My heart pumps hard in my chest as I get ready to face the night ahead of me, my body rocks with adrenaline as I jog toward the end of the roof and let myself down by grasping for the drainpipe, vines and empty holes in the wall. My feet hit the hard pavement with a thud and then I turn around and run.
The wind blinds, numbs and pushes ferociously against me as I run past building after dead building.
How long do I have left? Hours?... minutes? Less? I know it’s not long. I don’t know how I know that.
I run like I’ve never run before. With a vitality that’s never touched my body before. I run against the protest of my knee, the protest of my aching muscles. The wind slices my face, tears from the cold escape from my eyes and freezing on my cheek. Angry breaths escape my lips, yet I’m not breathing at all. I run.
I trip. A stone or some can that someone’s left on the pavement throws me off balance. My bad knee hits the ground. Angry, relentless pain shoots through my body, and I cry out in pain.
“You okay, man?” A tramp peers at me from beneath his sleeping bag.
My fists clench against the pavement and I push at the gritty ground, and then I’m breaking into a run again.
Ignoring my protesting knee, the pain in my chest, the fire in my lungs, I run.
***
-Nurse Downing-
“Hold on, hold on.” I groan taking a sip of my coffee, sighing at night-cam as someone presses the buzzer persistently. It’s a young boy. He presses the buzzer again and then jumps up at the camera waving straight at me from the screen. Someone’s impatient.
I put down my coffee, and press the button. “No visitors…” I begin.
“Liz Parker.” Says the frantic voice.
Oh. … I buzz him in.
“Liz… Parker…” . He jogs toward me, looking anxious . Almost crazy. Why is he breathing so hard? How far did he run…? “I…need….”
“Sorry son, I’m afraid I can’t let any visitors in at this time,” I say catching his bedraggled appearance. He’s definitely not a relative. “Maybe tomorrow,… if…” she’s still alive. I doubted it though.
“No.” He’s adamant.
“Are you a relative?” I ask impatiently. Its almost 3 in the morning. I don’t want to be dealing with this.
He shakes his head, breathing hard.
“Then I’m sorry, I can’t allow you in, unless you come with a relative.”
“P..Please..” he says breathlessly leaning against the counter holding onto his stomach. He looks pale.
“Are you okay?”
He bangs his fist against the counter and papers fly everywhere. “ DAMN IT, TELL ME WHERE SHE IS!!”
Whoa.
I purse my lips. “I’m going to have to ask you to—“
What the hell?!!
Suddenly my chair is sliding backward, despite me dragging my feet across the floor it doesn’t stop. I gasp as I try to get up. I can’t. I’m stuck?
I watch in shock, as his hands move over my papers and without even looking at them he sets off toward the lift like his life depends on it.
He disappears.
Shakily, I get up from my chair and then I press the alarm button underneath my desk.
****
There’s a clear ping as the lift ascends upward. Second floor. She has her own room. That’s good.
Jeff’s memories go through my mind, as he stood at the front desk not so long ago. Asking for more morphine as Liz screamed in pain. Nancy crying, Maria sobbing. His thoughts… not long…not long until she would peaceful. Not long until she would be more comfortable…He hoped it would be sooner rather than later…
He wanted her to die? I try not to think of the utter despair that could break a father like that.
I close my eyes. Breathe Max. Breathe…. It’ll be okay. You’re almost there now. Almost there.
The lift pings and doors open. My nostrils sting from the sterile smell. A plaque, with an arrow to my right says room 201 - 209A . I half jog, half limp to the right, pausing before I round the corner. With flashes of Jeff’s memories still firmly imprinted, I can tell this is the right place. I hear a murmur of voices from the other side of the wall and I press my body against the brick to observe from my hiding place .
Great. A whole crowd of people are congregated outside Liz’s room. The people I recognize include Alex, Jeff, and Liz’s Grandmother. There’s also a nurse, and some guy. Probably the doctor on call. A shadow appears from the darkened room. It’s Liz’s mom, Nancy.
“I need water.” She says weakly. Her skin looks pale and she’s shaking. Jeff looks toward the door. “Maria’s in there,” Nancy’s voice cracks. Jeff takes his wife’s arm worriedly and they walk away toward their left.
I wait, impatient.
A few seconds later Maria appears. Her eyes are red rimmed and unfocused. She takes a single step outside, throws her hand against her mouth and lets out a small, broken sob.
“Oh, sweetheart.” Liz’s grandmother moves toward Maria and embraces her. Alex is there in an instant, his arms around both of them. Covering them as they mumble and sob quietly.
My eyes flick to the two unknowns. The nurse and the doctor are talking quietly amongst themselves, moving further and further to the left, they turn a corner to talk in more privacy. Sensing a now or never opportunity I move from my hiding place and silently walk past Alex, Maria and Liz’s Grandmother into Liz’s room. Swiftly, I close the door behind, hearing the soft click, I wave my hand over the metal handle, sealing it.
I turn. Her hair is sprayed on the pillow behind, various tubes and lines poke out of her arms. The room is almost completely dark apart from a small lamp highlighting Liz and the wall behind her. The glow of the lamp accentuates her fragility, the shadows under her eyes. My eyes drop to her face, and I can’t help but be mesmerised at how unearthly she looks. Strangely beautiful. The ECG monitor makes a funny beeping sound, and I’m shaken back to reality.
Already there’s shuffling outside. “Did Jeff go back in?” Maria asks, sounding confused.
I don’t have much time.
The ECG beeps again, and Liz’s body trembles as the lines goes flat. That dreaded noise - the sound of death. My heart stops, and everything is slow motion as my eyes flick toward the screen where a single flat, green line moves across it.
Is this it?
Five seconds later, the line spikes upward really fast.
……….
I exhale a large lungful of air that I didn’t know I was holding as the ECG resumes normally, and then move forward with a sense of urgency. I’m shaking.
She has to look at me for this to work.
God, I hope she can still look at me…
“Liz?” I whisper as I move toward her.
Open your eyes. Please open your eyes….Come on…come on…
“Alex, do you know if Jeff is in there?” Someone says from outside.
“Liz…” I say more urgently from beside her.
Her eyes flicker.
Yes. That’s it. That’s it. Come on…
More beeping from the monitor as she blinks, looks up at me and without any surprise at all, says “Hi.”
Hi.
I don’t know how I manage it, but I smile.
I know that time’s running out. I can almost feel the tension palpitating from outside the door and I also know that any second, the inevitable could happen and I might not be of any use at all. I might not be of any use anyway…. yet, I can’t help those few moments that I stand next to her bedside and stare. Like she’s some type of miracle. Like if I touch her, she might just disappear. I almost forget the reason why I came in the first place.
Liz looks back at me, only understanding in her rich, brown eyes. How could she understand this? Even I don’t….
….With dawning realization, I know why it was so hard to be around her at school. Why avoidance was the best cure.
Her eyes flicker again and then in an extremely drowsy voice she says the strangest thing. “I was wondering when you were going to come.”
What? Before I can ponder what she means or if she’s too drugged to even know anymore, someone tries the door handle.
“Hey, the doors locked…” It’s Alex.
Liz’s eyes close and then there’s a three second flat line before another spike.
Shit. What the hell am I doing?
“Liz?” I ask desperately.
She opens her eyes weakly and I breathe again.
“Liz, can you look at me? I won’t be long… try and concentrate. Keep your eyes on me.” I say softly.
Her eyes move toward my face. Tired eyes, wide with trust. I lower the blanket from around her body, shoving it past her knees. Her body is limp and lifeless, her gown is thin. I can feel the lead like cold of her body as I place my hands above her ribs where I saw tumours were most developed when I caught her falling at school.
“Maybe it’s the doctor?!” Marias almost screaming as she tries the handle too. Once. Twice.
My eyes shift to the door.
To think I could have done this in the privacy of her room. Weeks ago, I could have healed her, But instead I chose to put her in danger… and through all this pain. All the pain she must be going through…
“…Max?” Liz says raspily. Her breathing is laboured. She’s struggling to keep eye contact. The monitor show’s uneven, fast heart beats.
Jesus….Concentrate, Max. Concentrate.
More discomfort outside. “What’s going on?” Jeff’s voice.
Oh. Crap.
Clearing my mind, I focus fully on the girl in front of me. I haven't done this for a long, long time but I’m determined to get it right. I won’t fail.
I can’t fail, again.
I allow the warmth from my body to gather in one place, gathering everything I have, every single ounce of energy in my bones, my body, my blood. I turn to face her, my eyes connecting with hers, trying to forge a connection.
That familiar tingling, prickling sensation in my back, my shoulders. It’s out of control, sharp, stinging.
Liz is looking at me, her eyes narrowed with concentration, taking in large gasps of air. I feel her pull, her aura, her energy. It’s weakening with every passing second.
You can do this, Max. You can do this….
Letting all the resistance from my body and my shoulders disappear, I project. My palm heats and fingers tingle. Like millions of bee’s swarming around me, the pinpricking feeling is not just in my chest anymore, it’s all over my body.
“Why is the door locked?!” Frantic knocking turns into banging.
My body starts to buzz, waves of luminous, illusionary colour surround me as I block out everything else and concentrate on the task at hand. I gather more and more of my energy and let it slide like a warm flow of electric from my hand. I press harder against her ribs, letting the warmth spread.
Then I see it -the disease in her body. It’s spread so far. Her stomach, pancreas, her blood, even some of her bones. It’s eating her alive, causing her heart to malfunction. Then, like penance for my sins, without a single warning, every single ounce of pain she has ever felt hits me at once. Without a single shot of morphine in my blood, I gasp out loud. The pain is fucking excruciating.
“Somebody’s in there.”
“Who was that? Hey!! Open the door! Get someone… who…?”
My eyes roll back in my head but I hold my ground. I can feel it working. I can feel the change in her body, the poisonous cells dispersing, disappearing, being eliminated under the heat of my hand.
Every single cell I eliminate, echoes through my body, like it’s trying to manifest itself in my own body, in my soul. Clawing, poisoning, knifing at me. I move over her body, carefully, destroying anything that dares get in my way, that dares to stop me. There’s only one goal. And I’m going to reach it, no matter what the consequence.
Flashes engulf me. Some of her memories, mainly her pain, her cramps. Her wondering at when it would all end. My memories mingle with hers. Normally, I would try to shield, but I’m too weak to stop them intertwining, weaving. The connection is too vibrant, too strong. It’s leading me now.
“WHO’S IN HERE?” Loud thumping, more shoving against the door.
I start to shake with effort. Warm liquid falls from my brow. Liz and Maria giggling as four years old…something about play dough…, Liz concentrating hard on her Science project, taking utmost pride in her work, Liz’s first kiss…it was Kyle? Liz glancing at me sideways in Biology, curious.
As her heartbeat becomes stronger, Liz’s eyes focus and then widen in confusion.
Liz’s joy everytime her grandmother visited, Liz’s pain when she saw Travis suffer after his brothers death, her regret for all those people she couldn’t help… her guilt at not being able to do our assignment.
“Max?”
Her voice is louder, clearer. That’s good. Her eyes haven’t left mine since I started, and I’m struggling to hold on.
The pain is unbearable. Vomit and something else….blood? moves up my throat, but I push it back down, relentless in my concentration, heat mingling, focusing on her blood becoming smoother, cleaner.
The hammering and yelling outside is agonizingly loud. More and more voices crowd the corridor and someone slams the weight of their body into the door. It trembles under the pressure.
Something else in Liz’s memories catches my attention…Really? …. I never knew she saw me in that way…..
At the same time, Liz’s eyes are wide, realization dawning in her eyes. “Oh…my…god…” she gasps.
I’m not exactly sure what she sees. I don’t have any control over it. Does she see my Mom, Emily…my pain at not being able to heal? Every single secret I’ve worked so hard to hide… ? What about Isabel and Michael’s secrets? The secrets of the dangerous world that we live in? I don’t know, I can’t tell, but I’ve laid myself bare.
I groan out loud, my eye sight blurring with the pain. I can’t feel the prickling sensation, now. It’s all just raw, excruciating fire and pain.
Liz is on her elbows. Her large, questioning eyes still probing mine.”Max?”
I’m gasping hard. Trying to ease the burning with a lungfuls of air. I can barely see her. I wave my hand over her body one more time, rechecking.
She’s okay.
She’s okay.
I’m stumbling away. My own body shaking with tiny convulsions, lips stinging, throat parched…the fire is congregating in my stomach. I think I’m going to throw up. Blood. I can taste blood.
“Max…!” Liz cries again, sitting up, her eyes shocked, round, confused.
I wipe away the tickle of blood from my nose, “Shh,” I manage.” Please…just… shhh….”
She stares at me from her upright position, but doesn’t say another word. Her ward door continues to shudder with screams and combined weight. But Liz stares at me like she isn’t hearing the noise outside, watching as I fall against the back wall and reach shakily for the window.
I can barely see, or breath, or think. All I know is survival instinct. I need to get out, before they get in.
With one last glance at her, I grab the ledge and hoist myself over the edge of the window and stumble as far as I can, before darkness overtakes me.
TBC
Last edited by Blue*Soul on Sat Oct 18, 2008 3:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Seeking Surrender (M/L, chapter 5, 10/17)
hey guys,
i just wanted to let you know I havent abandoned this. I am half way through the next chapter but for some reasons its harder to write than i thought...anyhow i will be back soon!
i just wanted to let you know I havent abandoned this. I am half way through the next chapter but for some reasons its harder to write than i thought...anyhow i will be back soon!
Re: Seeking Surrender (M/L, chapter 5, 10/17)
Despite how long this took me I feel like this chapter is a mega-bore. Though I felt it was necessary to at least show some aftermath and answer some questions.
Thanks for all your responses on the previous part. I must say I liked the “wows” although, admittedly, the long FB's are my favourite Galliard: Yes of course I’ve read twilight. I’ve always been apprehensive about writing single scenes from two POV’s due to the boredom factor, but I actually found Midnight Sun really interesting. I won’t write the previous chapter from Liz POV, because a lot needs to remain a mystery. But I think the next few chapters (not this one) will gives us much more of Liz's perspective.
Wench on a Leash: The reason Max said he was being selfish, was because he was doing something he needed to do to put himself at ease (save Liz) when ultimately he was causing danger to many others (Isabel, Michael, the community). The whole thing about this alie community is that it's quite shady. Even it's own people are unsure how far they will go.
ILYMEFOREVER: Do you mean No Regrets http://www.roswellfanatics.net/viewtopic.php?t=11409 or Time Changes Everything? http://www.roswellfanatics.net/viewtopic.php?t=11409
Twilight and Morning Dreamgirl: thanks for your lovely, long FB. It’s what I live and obsess about!
Thanks for reading all, keeping coming back!
ETA: I'm really throwing the creative license out there with this chapter... (and generally with the whole of this fic). So humour me
Seeking Surrender
Chapter 6
Laurie
The noise in my head is deafening, unbearable. I jerk upright and various herb bottles and 2 extinguished candles fly to the floor beside me.
I must have fallen asleep at the store again and this wasn’t the first time this week either. Sighing, I rub the crick on my neck… and more frantic banging.
Wow. Someone was actually here?
My eyes fall to the till where a little counter clock flashes steady 4.25am. It was probably drunkard kids who had lost their way home again.
Stretching a little, I manoeuvre my way through the darkened store. Even if my eyes couldn’t make out the shapes in the dark, I would know the place like the back of my hand.
I guess my falling asleep here wasn’t really a coincidence after all - this place felt more like home than any other place had in a long time.
I flip a light switch, and blink as my eyes adjust to a dim light that basks the store in sickly yellow looking glow.
“I’m coming, I’m coming!” I groan at the continuous racket, and then pull open the wooden, unpainted door in annoyance.
The first thing that hits me is the icy air and then I gasp at the scene in front of me.
Even though we’ve barely swapped greetings twice, I instantly recognize Max’s sister, Isabel. Her brown eyes are wide in fear and hair surprisingly disarrayed, as she regards me breathlessly. Next to her, wearing a tight, grim expression is her cousin, Michael. I’ve never spoken to him…not that, that mattered. Unlike Max, Michael wasn’t one to shy away from attention. In fact Michael’s very nature commanded it. That, and everyone worth knowing knew he was the only son of one of the most influential men in New Mexico.
My eyes land on the figure between them. Max is leaning forward; Michael’s hands on his chest are his only support as his head bows downward, prostrating toward me. I can’t see his face, but I don’t need to, to know something is very wrong.
“Oh my god… what happened?” I cry, letting the door fly wider as Isabel struggles when Max’s weight moves in her direction too much.
Before either answers me, I turn and manoeuvre them through the small store and through a back door. My hand automatically hits a switch, inches from the door, and florescent, buzzing light surrounds us, as Isabel and Michael lower a half conscious Max on a worn out mattress on the floor.
His face is waxy white, and the purple shadows under his eyes look like bruising. Something strange happens in my chest when I notice the tremors going through his body.
“Shit hit the fan. That’s what happened.” Michael finally answers. Eyes trained on Max, he wipes his brow.
Isabel is breathing hard as she falls next to her brother and touches his chest. “He healed someone… he healed a girl…”
He healed a girl?....What?
That made no sense.
The ability to heal was an uncommon primary gift. Most wore it like a curse rather than a gift because of the heavy implications that it bore. What was the point in having the ability to heal when you couldn’t do it without the potential of huge damage to yourself?
It seemed like an unfair burden for those that had to carry it, especially since most of our gifts bore no repercussions. They were mainly aggressive, sometimes recreational, but hardly ever dangerous. …Except there were those rare few that made life difficult for those that wore them. It was like a glitch…. something that didn’t fit or hadn’t evolved the way that it was meant to.
Such a beautiful gift with so much potential to harm.
And it had harmed Max.
Not that he ever spoke about it…. but he did let me see his past once. It happened randomly, when we were sitting at the pier and he grazed my arm. Maybe it was an accident or maybe, he just wanted me to see what he had hidden from others for so long.
In that moment I saw his childhood. At barely four years of age he would heal animals and others from our kind, and sometimes when he knew they wouldn’t notice, he would even heal small cuts and grazes on humans. It would hurt him of course, but this type of pain that was worth it. Watching the pain disappear, watching the small smile, or that look of gratitude made him feel like all the pain in the world would be worth it.
But then as he grew older, things became darker in Max’s mind. When he was twelve he had tried to heal Sandy Pearson’s broken leg. She was the first girl he had ever kissed and like him, Alien too. He hadn’t been able to heal her because the pain had made him shake and cry and even throw up. The accusing look in Sandy’s eyes had haunted him for years afterward. And then time after time had passed, and small moments that would jilt his ego…. stop him from healing. And then that thing with his Mom and sister…. that had shocked Max into complete abstinence.
“We didn’t know where else to take him…I know he comes here and you can do stuff. I thought maybe… “ my eyes narrow in on Isabel’s harrowed expression. Right now she’s anything but the indifferent ice princess that others rumour her to be, “there is something you can do, right?” The terrified, pleading look in her face makes me swallow, but only dryness hits the back of my throat.
“Let me get some stuff.” I run back through the door, and scan the shelves, listing off potential cures in my mind.
His body must be completely off balance.
No.
No.
Useless in this situation.
The healing crystals.
Yes.
I grab the pouch from the corner.
And he’s probably dehydrated too.
“Get him some water!” I yell, as I grab a few more bottles from the shelf.
Instantly I hear movement and water running.
“And try and keep him awake… if you can”
There’s silence and then a sharp sound of a slap.
“Michael!” Isabel cries from the other room.
I notice my cell lying on the counter and on impulse I grab it and make a quick phone call. The more help we had right now, the better. Grabbing my two bottles of ointment and the crystals, I run back to the backroom, and join Michael on the cold concrete floor beside the mattress Max is laying on. His shaking has subsided, but he’s clearly dipping in and out of consciousness.
Isabel has pulled the only rickety chair from against the wall, and is staring down at her brother intensely, grasping and ungrasping her hands.
Michael is unbuttoning Max’s shirt. I see yellowing and purplish bruises all over his stomach. God, it looked like someone had punched him repeatedly.
I reach out for Max’s wrist. His eyes flicker, and he lets out a small groan at my touch. His pulse is erratic.
Fear thrums through my body.
Jesus. What?... why?...
I shake my head. Questions later. I just hoped this worked.
I open the pouch and pull out healing crystals.
Michael’s hand grabs my wrist. It’s not a friendly gesture.
“You know what you’re doing, right?”
If it were any other time, I might have been offended by his tone but I shake myself out of his grasp.
“I’m not a healer Michael, not that that really helps judging from Max’s state…but I … we can help balance him a bit more. If we all channel our energies, we can keep safe, and at least part heal him to take the edge off the pain”
Although we all had the different primary powers, most of us had the ability to use other gifts as well. The safest way for the rest of us to heal (not that many of us tried) was to do it in groups so that the intensity would come together, and any possible pain would spread across the group.
“We don’t even know the extent of the damage.”
“But this is better than nothing, right?”
Michael doesn’t look convinced, but this is the best option we have. And I’ll be damned if I don’t even try it.
“I’m going to need all of your help.” I say placing the hard, cool crystals on Max’s heated chest.
In an instant Isabel falls from her chair and scurries toward me, taking hold of my left hand. Her hand is warm and clammy.
“Look at his stomach. Its clearly internal bleeding. We need to get him to a real doctor.” Michael says grim faced.
“Michael.” Isabel announces, holding her hand toward him.
Michael hesitates, and Max lets out another groan.
I bite my lip, trying my utter best to not smack Michael around the head.
“Do you know a doctor that isn’t going to report us to the FBI after looking at Max’s state? Or even one that’s not going to report us to the council?”
Michael looks at me blankly.
“No. I didn’t think so. I know only one and he’s on his way, so I suggest you hold her hand. Now.”
Michael throws me a resentful look but reluctantly grabs Isabel’s hand. I close my eyes and concentrate. Gathering my energy I lean toward Max and place my hand over his stomach.
Then I feel it. The gentle flow of energy from my body to his. Like an electrical current, Michael’s energies flows to Isabel and her warmth flows into mine. A circle of potent, healing energy. My body starts to tingle, but it’s not painful and suddenly there’s a shift. We all feel it. Max’s eyes flicker open. He looks exhausted, but focused.
Suddenly I feel five hundred pounds lighter. Like I’m floating.
“Oh thank god. Max. Thank god!” Isabel cries, letting go of my hands grabbing Max's. Small glistening tears falling from her face.
Michael rakes his hand through his hair, and without acknowledging Max gets up from his position on the floor. There’s silence and then I jump as he yells “JESUS!” whilst kicking the rickety chair against the wall.
I turn to Max, but his eyes are already closing. This time I know there’s no danger though. He’s simply too tired to keep them open.
“What are you doing, Michael?” Isabel says suddenly.
“Damage control.” I turn to see Michael holding his cell phone to his ear.
Isabel and I exchange apprehensive glances. I’m not exactly in the know on what just happened here, but I am pretty sure about a few things.
I know that Max healed someone.
I know that hell is about to break loose.
I know that we somehow have to clear this mess before hell comes to Earth.
I also know that Michael is a complete and utter jack ass.
I wonder if it ever became easier to put up with him, because right now all I wanted to do was blast the daylights out of him. But instead I manage, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“I agree,” Isabel pipes up, “I don’t think you should…not until he’s fully awake.”
Michael ignores us, turning his back toward us and furiously tapping numbers into his cell.
“Michael! We still have to careful, subtle. Don’t forget that.”
“She’s right.” I say, sudden fear intoxicating my body.
If this got out to the wrong people , it could get bad…. Worse.
Michael swerves around angrily. “What? So now I should wait for the king of fucking subtlety to arise from his nap? Do you know what he’s done? He’s left the whole fucking town aware of what you, I and she have spent all our whole existences hiding!” he points to each of us in turn with his cell phone, “It’s the only thing they ask of us. To keep quiet, to keep this our secret, to keepthem from knowing. This shit is going to spread so fast that the fire of London’s gunna look tame…. Someone’s gotta control it.”
Stunned by his speech, Isabel and I sit without a word for a couple of minutes, as Michael continues stabs at his cell phone.
“Who are you calling?” Isabel finally asks in weary voice.
“Daniel.”
Oh.
There’s half a second of stunned silence before Isabel jumps up and flies across the room. “Daniel? Are you kidding me? Daniel Montgomery?!” She grabs the cell phone from his fingers, “Are you insane? Or just trying to get us killed? ”
Michael groans, and takes a single step toward her. “I’m trying to save us, Iz.. We all know his primary gift it to tilt memories…. he’s powerful enough to do it to more than one person at the same time. Thanks to your kind brother, who knows how many people know right now.”
He moves to grab his cell, but Isabel’s moves back out of his reach, swinging her arm and the cell behind her. “He’s also an absolute militant, Michael. I will not let you risk Max’s life for this.”
Michael grabs her elbow as she attempts to move back from him, Isabel lets out a small screech as Michael handles her roughly, prying the cell from her fingers.
“He risked ours. He risked yours and mine, the whole of our community. For what? Some girl he barely knows. Some human chick that was meant to die anyway.”
“It’s done now. We can’t take it back!” Isabel takes a swipe toward his phone, but Michael is too fast.
“Damn right. They aren’t even our species. Scum. Powerless. Deluded. The only reason they have so much power is because there is so fucking many of them . If they really knew who really had the power- those, those–“
“They are living beings too, Michael.” I say, anger rising inside my core.
Michael turns to look at me. Noticing his distraction, Isabel grabs his cell from his hand. Michael is so preoccupied with his stare-down he doesn’t bother to ensue in the game of cell phone tag he and Isabel were playing. Instead he turns this weird purple, as looks at me with distaste that only he can muster, “You would say that. Isn’t this shit what got you into trouble in the first place? Max would befriend someone like you… trust him to frolic with a human lover ” he says the last part like it’s some kind of disease I’ve contracted. “No wonder this shit happened. You clearly have been rubbing off on him. In the wrong way.”
Maybe I should wince at his words. Or cry. Or swear. But it doesn’t affect me anymore.
Instead I look at him blankly. “So you’re willing to sacrifice your cousin to keep your secret safe?”
The question is loaded, yet it’s one that our kind have asked each other for centuries. Whose side are you really on? How will it end? Us or them?
Implications for everyone. Repercussions at their worst.
Michael doesn’t hesitate when giving me the stock answer embroiled in all our brains. “For the greater good, yes.”
Everything for the greater good.
“Don’t do this Michael. Don’t make it difficult… don’t make me choose sides, you are my family too.” Isabel says softly.
“I think you’ve already chosen.”
Michael looks at Isabel, and their eyes clash in some unspoken communication that escapes me. And then something strange happens. Michael almost looks like he’s… surrendered?
“Shit!”
He kicks the chair one more time and stomps out. I hear the front door clang behind him.
Isabel sighs and falls on the mattress next to Max still holding Michaels cell.
We embrace silence for a while.
“I’m sorry.” She says suddenly. “He can be such a jerk.”
I shrug. “It comes with the territory. I fell for someone who I wasn’t meant to fall in love with. I broke a lot of laws. The only reason I’m here probably, is because of my lineage… my great aunt was kind of respected.”
“Yeah…Sophia, I know, “ she manages a small smile, “I hope the whole elite background thing will help with Max… I mean if things go anymore awry.”
“It helps,” I shrug, “But I wouldn’t put anything past them.” My eyes narrow at the door where Michael just disappeared through. “He’s not going to do anything stupid is he?”
“No.” Isabel shakes her head, “I don’t think so.”
We both jump at the sudden knocking at the front door, and my cell goes off simultaneously.
“That’s help.” I say to Isabel as I jog toward the door, I glance at her frightened expression before I walk out, “Don’t worry, it will be okay.”
More than anything right now, I really hoped I was right.
Thanks for all your responses on the previous part. I must say I liked the “wows” although, admittedly, the long FB's are my favourite
Galliard: Yes of course I’ve read twilight. I’ve always been apprehensive about writing single scenes from two POV’s due to the boredom factor, but I actually found Midnight Sun really interesting. I won’t write the previous chapter from Liz POV, because a lot needs to remain a mystery. But I think the next few chapters (not this one) will gives us much more of Liz's perspective. Wench on a Leash: The reason Max said he was being selfish, was because he was doing something he needed to do to put himself at ease (save Liz) when ultimately he was causing danger to many others (Isabel, Michael, the community). The whole thing about this alie community is that it's quite shady. Even it's own people are unsure how far they will go.
ILYMEFOREVER: Do you mean No Regrets http://www.roswellfanatics.net/viewtopic.php?t=11409 or Time Changes Everything? http://www.roswellfanatics.net/viewtopic.php?t=11409
Twilight and Morning Dreamgirl: thanks for your lovely, long FB. It’s what I live and obsess about!
Thanks for reading all, keeping coming back!
ETA: I'm really throwing the creative license out there with this chapter... (and generally with the whole of this fic). So humour me
Seeking Surrender
Chapter 6
Laurie
The noise in my head is deafening, unbearable. I jerk upright and various herb bottles and 2 extinguished candles fly to the floor beside me.
I must have fallen asleep at the store again and this wasn’t the first time this week either. Sighing, I rub the crick on my neck… and more frantic banging.
Wow. Someone was actually here?
My eyes fall to the till where a little counter clock flashes steady 4.25am. It was probably drunkard kids who had lost their way home again.
Stretching a little, I manoeuvre my way through the darkened store. Even if my eyes couldn’t make out the shapes in the dark, I would know the place like the back of my hand.
I guess my falling asleep here wasn’t really a coincidence after all - this place felt more like home than any other place had in a long time.
I flip a light switch, and blink as my eyes adjust to a dim light that basks the store in sickly yellow looking glow.
“I’m coming, I’m coming!” I groan at the continuous racket, and then pull open the wooden, unpainted door in annoyance.
The first thing that hits me is the icy air and then I gasp at the scene in front of me.
Even though we’ve barely swapped greetings twice, I instantly recognize Max’s sister, Isabel. Her brown eyes are wide in fear and hair surprisingly disarrayed, as she regards me breathlessly. Next to her, wearing a tight, grim expression is her cousin, Michael. I’ve never spoken to him…not that, that mattered. Unlike Max, Michael wasn’t one to shy away from attention. In fact Michael’s very nature commanded it. That, and everyone worth knowing knew he was the only son of one of the most influential men in New Mexico.
My eyes land on the figure between them. Max is leaning forward; Michael’s hands on his chest are his only support as his head bows downward, prostrating toward me. I can’t see his face, but I don’t need to, to know something is very wrong.
“Oh my god… what happened?” I cry, letting the door fly wider as Isabel struggles when Max’s weight moves in her direction too much.
Before either answers me, I turn and manoeuvre them through the small store and through a back door. My hand automatically hits a switch, inches from the door, and florescent, buzzing light surrounds us, as Isabel and Michael lower a half conscious Max on a worn out mattress on the floor.
His face is waxy white, and the purple shadows under his eyes look like bruising. Something strange happens in my chest when I notice the tremors going through his body.
“Shit hit the fan. That’s what happened.” Michael finally answers. Eyes trained on Max, he wipes his brow.
Isabel is breathing hard as she falls next to her brother and touches his chest. “He healed someone… he healed a girl…”
He healed a girl?....What?
That made no sense.
The ability to heal was an uncommon primary gift. Most wore it like a curse rather than a gift because of the heavy implications that it bore. What was the point in having the ability to heal when you couldn’t do it without the potential of huge damage to yourself?
It seemed like an unfair burden for those that had to carry it, especially since most of our gifts bore no repercussions. They were mainly aggressive, sometimes recreational, but hardly ever dangerous. …Except there were those rare few that made life difficult for those that wore them. It was like a glitch…. something that didn’t fit or hadn’t evolved the way that it was meant to.
Such a beautiful gift with so much potential to harm.
And it had harmed Max.
Not that he ever spoke about it…. but he did let me see his past once. It happened randomly, when we were sitting at the pier and he grazed my arm. Maybe it was an accident or maybe, he just wanted me to see what he had hidden from others for so long.
In that moment I saw his childhood. At barely four years of age he would heal animals and others from our kind, and sometimes when he knew they wouldn’t notice, he would even heal small cuts and grazes on humans. It would hurt him of course, but this type of pain that was worth it. Watching the pain disappear, watching the small smile, or that look of gratitude made him feel like all the pain in the world would be worth it.
But then as he grew older, things became darker in Max’s mind. When he was twelve he had tried to heal Sandy Pearson’s broken leg. She was the first girl he had ever kissed and like him, Alien too. He hadn’t been able to heal her because the pain had made him shake and cry and even throw up. The accusing look in Sandy’s eyes had haunted him for years afterward. And then time after time had passed, and small moments that would jilt his ego…. stop him from healing. And then that thing with his Mom and sister…. that had shocked Max into complete abstinence.
“We didn’t know where else to take him…I know he comes here and you can do stuff. I thought maybe… “ my eyes narrow in on Isabel’s harrowed expression. Right now she’s anything but the indifferent ice princess that others rumour her to be, “there is something you can do, right?” The terrified, pleading look in her face makes me swallow, but only dryness hits the back of my throat.
“Let me get some stuff.” I run back through the door, and scan the shelves, listing off potential cures in my mind.
His body must be completely off balance.
No.
No.
Useless in this situation.
The healing crystals.
Yes.
I grab the pouch from the corner.
And he’s probably dehydrated too.
“Get him some water!” I yell, as I grab a few more bottles from the shelf.
Instantly I hear movement and water running.
“And try and keep him awake… if you can”
There’s silence and then a sharp sound of a slap.
“Michael!” Isabel cries from the other room.
I notice my cell lying on the counter and on impulse I grab it and make a quick phone call. The more help we had right now, the better. Grabbing my two bottles of ointment and the crystals, I run back to the backroom, and join Michael on the cold concrete floor beside the mattress Max is laying on. His shaking has subsided, but he’s clearly dipping in and out of consciousness.
Isabel has pulled the only rickety chair from against the wall, and is staring down at her brother intensely, grasping and ungrasping her hands.
Michael is unbuttoning Max’s shirt. I see yellowing and purplish bruises all over his stomach. God, it looked like someone had punched him repeatedly.
I reach out for Max’s wrist. His eyes flicker, and he lets out a small groan at my touch. His pulse is erratic.
Fear thrums through my body.
Jesus. What?... why?...
I shake my head. Questions later. I just hoped this worked.
I open the pouch and pull out healing crystals.
Michael’s hand grabs my wrist. It’s not a friendly gesture.
“You know what you’re doing, right?”
If it were any other time, I might have been offended by his tone but I shake myself out of his grasp.
“I’m not a healer Michael, not that that really helps judging from Max’s state…but I … we can help balance him a bit more. If we all channel our energies, we can keep safe, and at least part heal him to take the edge off the pain”
Although we all had the different primary powers, most of us had the ability to use other gifts as well. The safest way for the rest of us to heal (not that many of us tried) was to do it in groups so that the intensity would come together, and any possible pain would spread across the group.
“We don’t even know the extent of the damage.”
“But this is better than nothing, right?”
Michael doesn’t look convinced, but this is the best option we have. And I’ll be damned if I don’t even try it.
“I’m going to need all of your help.” I say placing the hard, cool crystals on Max’s heated chest.
In an instant Isabel falls from her chair and scurries toward me, taking hold of my left hand. Her hand is warm and clammy.
“Look at his stomach. Its clearly internal bleeding. We need to get him to a real doctor.” Michael says grim faced.
“Michael.” Isabel announces, holding her hand toward him.
Michael hesitates, and Max lets out another groan.
I bite my lip, trying my utter best to not smack Michael around the head.
“Do you know a doctor that isn’t going to report us to the FBI after looking at Max’s state? Or even one that’s not going to report us to the council?”
Michael looks at me blankly.
“No. I didn’t think so. I know only one and he’s on his way, so I suggest you hold her hand. Now.”
Michael throws me a resentful look but reluctantly grabs Isabel’s hand. I close my eyes and concentrate. Gathering my energy I lean toward Max and place my hand over his stomach.
Then I feel it. The gentle flow of energy from my body to his. Like an electrical current, Michael’s energies flows to Isabel and her warmth flows into mine. A circle of potent, healing energy. My body starts to tingle, but it’s not painful and suddenly there’s a shift. We all feel it. Max’s eyes flicker open. He looks exhausted, but focused.
Suddenly I feel five hundred pounds lighter. Like I’m floating.
“Oh thank god. Max. Thank god!” Isabel cries, letting go of my hands grabbing Max's. Small glistening tears falling from her face.
Michael rakes his hand through his hair, and without acknowledging Max gets up from his position on the floor. There’s silence and then I jump as he yells “JESUS!” whilst kicking the rickety chair against the wall.
I turn to Max, but his eyes are already closing. This time I know there’s no danger though. He’s simply too tired to keep them open.
“What are you doing, Michael?” Isabel says suddenly.
“Damage control.” I turn to see Michael holding his cell phone to his ear.
Isabel and I exchange apprehensive glances. I’m not exactly in the know on what just happened here, but I am pretty sure about a few things.
I know that Max healed someone.
I know that hell is about to break loose.
I know that we somehow have to clear this mess before hell comes to Earth.
I also know that Michael is a complete and utter jack ass.
I wonder if it ever became easier to put up with him, because right now all I wanted to do was blast the daylights out of him. But instead I manage, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“I agree,” Isabel pipes up, “I don’t think you should…not until he’s fully awake.”
Michael ignores us, turning his back toward us and furiously tapping numbers into his cell.
“Michael! We still have to careful, subtle. Don’t forget that.”
“She’s right.” I say, sudden fear intoxicating my body.
If this got out to the wrong people , it could get bad…. Worse.
Michael swerves around angrily. “What? So now I should wait for the king of fucking subtlety to arise from his nap? Do you know what he’s done? He’s left the whole fucking town aware of what you, I and she have spent all our whole existences hiding!” he points to each of us in turn with his cell phone, “It’s the only thing they ask of us. To keep quiet, to keep this our secret, to keepthem from knowing. This shit is going to spread so fast that the fire of London’s gunna look tame…. Someone’s gotta control it.”
Stunned by his speech, Isabel and I sit without a word for a couple of minutes, as Michael continues stabs at his cell phone.
“Who are you calling?” Isabel finally asks in weary voice.
“Daniel.”
Oh.
There’s half a second of stunned silence before Isabel jumps up and flies across the room. “Daniel? Are you kidding me? Daniel Montgomery?!” She grabs the cell phone from his fingers, “Are you insane? Or just trying to get us killed? ”
Michael groans, and takes a single step toward her. “I’m trying to save us, Iz.. We all know his primary gift it to tilt memories…. he’s powerful enough to do it to more than one person at the same time. Thanks to your kind brother, who knows how many people know right now.”
He moves to grab his cell, but Isabel’s moves back out of his reach, swinging her arm and the cell behind her. “He’s also an absolute militant, Michael. I will not let you risk Max’s life for this.”
Michael grabs her elbow as she attempts to move back from him, Isabel lets out a small screech as Michael handles her roughly, prying the cell from her fingers.
“He risked ours. He risked yours and mine, the whole of our community. For what? Some girl he barely knows. Some human chick that was meant to die anyway.”
“It’s done now. We can’t take it back!” Isabel takes a swipe toward his phone, but Michael is too fast.
“Damn right. They aren’t even our species. Scum. Powerless. Deluded. The only reason they have so much power is because there is so fucking many of them . If they really knew who really had the power- those, those–“
“They are living beings too, Michael.” I say, anger rising inside my core.
Michael turns to look at me. Noticing his distraction, Isabel grabs his cell from his hand. Michael is so preoccupied with his stare-down he doesn’t bother to ensue in the game of cell phone tag he and Isabel were playing. Instead he turns this weird purple, as looks at me with distaste that only he can muster, “You would say that. Isn’t this shit what got you into trouble in the first place? Max would befriend someone like you… trust him to frolic with a human lover ” he says the last part like it’s some kind of disease I’ve contracted. “No wonder this shit happened. You clearly have been rubbing off on him. In the wrong way.”
Maybe I should wince at his words. Or cry. Or swear. But it doesn’t affect me anymore.
Instead I look at him blankly. “So you’re willing to sacrifice your cousin to keep your secret safe?”
The question is loaded, yet it’s one that our kind have asked each other for centuries. Whose side are you really on? How will it end? Us or them?
Implications for everyone. Repercussions at their worst.
Michael doesn’t hesitate when giving me the stock answer embroiled in all our brains. “For the greater good, yes.”
Everything for the greater good.
“Don’t do this Michael. Don’t make it difficult… don’t make me choose sides, you are my family too.” Isabel says softly.
“I think you’ve already chosen.”
Michael looks at Isabel, and their eyes clash in some unspoken communication that escapes me. And then something strange happens. Michael almost looks like he’s… surrendered?
“Shit!”
He kicks the chair one more time and stomps out. I hear the front door clang behind him.
Isabel sighs and falls on the mattress next to Max still holding Michaels cell.
We embrace silence for a while.
“I’m sorry.” She says suddenly. “He can be such a jerk.”
I shrug. “It comes with the territory. I fell for someone who I wasn’t meant to fall in love with. I broke a lot of laws. The only reason I’m here probably, is because of my lineage… my great aunt was kind of respected.”
“Yeah…Sophia, I know, “ she manages a small smile, “I hope the whole elite background thing will help with Max… I mean if things go anymore awry.”
“It helps,” I shrug, “But I wouldn’t put anything past them.” My eyes narrow at the door where Michael just disappeared through. “He’s not going to do anything stupid is he?”
“No.” Isabel shakes her head, “I don’t think so.”
We both jump at the sudden knocking at the front door, and my cell goes off simultaneously.
“That’s help.” I say to Isabel as I jog toward the door, I glance at her frightened expression before I walk out, “Don’t worry, it will be okay.”
More than anything right now, I really hoped I was right.
Last edited by Blue*Soul on Mon Nov 24, 2008 2:42 pm, edited 2 times in total.