Adia (CCUC Adult M/L, Z/L etc) - CH34 Epilogue2 - 11/17

[kyliemou]

You guys are the best feedbackers anyone could ever ask for: totallizfan, roswell3053, forever dreamer, kay_b, KiaraAlexisKlay (x2), garcia88, jake17 (x2), paper, JRose, and ruthandnina.

Q&A:

Question... How did Max not see himself??? Why does he still think that she cheated with Kyle?? I can't wait for more. Hurry back soon.

and

How exactly did Max think that the version he saw of himself was Kyle? He really is a special kind of dumb!!

All shall be slightly answered next chapter. I'm such a tease.

Hmmm, so Max didn't see that the guy slept with was actually another version of him. And that hint about Future Liz maybe being pregnant, could present Liz be too? Wow, that would be so weird, two Liz's, both pregnant by different versions of Max. I wonder if he'll ever find out about it.

Hmm, now there's a thought. UPDATE BOTH OF YOUR FICS NOW, HONEY! *glomps*

Also, can't wait for Present Zan and Present Liz to meet....if their meeting goes the way it was with FLiz, than the sparks and attraction will fly fo sure! I get the feeling that Zan would be a little more understanding where Liz is coming from than Maxhole. And how dare max?! what an idiot if he couldn't see or hear in the flashes that it was a future him doing the hot sweaty nasty horizontal mambo tango with Liz. And his reaction was completely uncalled for! OH....I hope FLiz isn't preggers....think about what would happen if her and Zan's baby if she were whooshed up like her hubby of the future? Sad thought, not thinking it!

and

Isn't Adia the name of a song? I thought I read somewhere there was a song by this name. *goes off to think* Oh, yeah. Please update. Thank you. Edit: I was right! It is a song! Thank you Google and Wikipedia. Adia is Swahili for "the Gift." “Adia” Single by Sarah McLachlan from the album Surfacing.

Wow, "Maxhole"? OMG, "hot sweaty nasty horizontal mambo tango"?! XD That's the funniest thing I have ever read, Kristin! As I said to the people who asked the same question about Max, all shall be sort of answered in the next chapter. Oh, and your first feedback has a huge hint to my story and this chapter has a few hints in it too. And yes, Adia is a song by Sarah McLachlan. I was listening to this song when I got the idea to this story. I won't tell you any more!

Hey you! once again loved loved your update! Perfect how you write Liz and Zan together! So freaking hot! and your story just keeps getting more more interesting as you go.. so good!! IM still trying to get over the fact that you actually met Jason ....that he actually had his arm around you... I think I would have blacked out if I felt that freaking arm touch me !! I don't know how you did it!! My muse isn't speaking to me right now.... I have no idea what I did! I will keep trying ..thank you sweetie!

and

bump! I know school is important but we need you back...this is just too good woman! And not to push it but a serious hot part wouldn't exactly ruin my day..

Carrie, I updated! Now it's your turn! Oh, and my version of Liz+Zan=Perfect? No way! You write them perfectly! Though they may not converse properly in your story, they are more perfect in yours than mine! Trust me! They have such hot sex in yours and I swear, I'm surprised Liz hasn't been impregnated by five billion cute brown-eyed alien babies! I wouldn't mind being impregnated several times by Zan, and Max, and Jason, and Future-Max. Goddamnit, Jason, why couldn't you have a twin?!?!?! Your muse not working on you? You have no idea what to write? Just write more smut! XD That's always the answer to a writer's block. You know what? I barely even remember what happened when I met Jason. It's like I lost a few hours of my life. I'm pretty sure I died, went to heaven, hallucinated that I met Jason, and was brought back to life by ugly good-for-nothing doctors that broke me out of my fantasy. UPDATE YOUR STORY NOWWWWWWWW~ ROAR!

Unless Lonnie & Rath off him, like on the show. Are they evil? Seems that Max got impressions of Liz's fun but not the full picture. No wonder he's mad. I thought he wanted to be friends? I feel sorry for Max. All his alter-egos are gettin' all the action while he gets the gerbil.

At the moment, Lonnie and Rath are good. I didn't like how the writers of Roswell made them evil. I think they have the potential to be really good people. Well, this chapter shows you their good side. I will be including more chapters in the future that is focused on each individual dupe. See, so many of my readers are angry at Max. I honestly didn't mean to make people hate him. I love Max dearly, and I just want to show that he's just as hurt as Liz is. I feel that if anyone was in his position, they would react the same way he would.

Okay just stumbled upon this fic and it's amazing! Everything is so well written and the premise is so interesting it could be real... if roswell was on cinemax haha. Keep the updates coming!!!!

Awww, thank you so much, JRose! Oh man, Roswell on Cinemax? Why just keep it at Cinemax? Why not Skinemax?

Hi Kylie, I don't want to push, but I really miss your story. You know, I was so pissed of Max’s behaviour. How for the world he can’t identify himself in the flashes? And then, instead of talking to Liz or taking the time and thinking about over all, he is running to Tess and the others. Max, that was far from good! It will be really sad, if Future Liz will disappear somewhere in the universe.

Thanks Ruth. Like I said above about Max and his stupidity to not identify himself, it will sort of be answered in the next chapter.



Rating: Adult.
Author's Note: I'm sorry this chapter was so late. School got the best of me. How is it possible for two papers and two exams to pop up at the same time?! I would like to apologize in advance if the next few chapters will be late as well. Finals are coming up, *gulps*, and I'm terrified. I will make it up to you all by trying to make each chapter as long as possible. This one is nine pages! But you might hate me for what happens in this chapter. Sorry if this chapter sucks. And wow, do you guys all hate Max! XD I didn't mean to have that effect on you people. Love Max, it's not his fault!

I also apologize if there are any mistakes in the grammar and in the directions or time span below. I got the directions and time off of Yahoo Maps, and I was sort of in a rush to post this chapter for all you impatient readers. Other than that, the dupes' language: All spellings errors in this chapter are deliberate.




Chapter Eleven:

I've been searching for you.
I heard a cry within my soul.
I've never had a yearning quite like this before.
Know that you are walking right through my door.

All of my life, where have you been?
I wonder if I'll ever see you again.
And if that day comes, I know we could win.
I wonder if I'll ever see you again.

A sacred gift of heaven for better worse, wherever.
And I would never let somebody break you down until you cried, never.

All of my life, where have you been?
I wonder if I'll ever see you again.
And if that day comes, I know we could win.
I wonder if I'll ever see you again.

At every time I've always known
that you were there, upon your throne,
a lonely queen without her king.
I longed for you, my love forever.

All of my life, where have you been?
I wonder if I'll ever see you again.
And if that day comes, I know we could win.
I wonder if I'll ever see you again.

I wonder if I'll ever see you again.
I wonder if I'll ever see you again.
“Again,” Lenny Kravitz.

December 16-18, 2000, Saturday-Monday; New York:

Today was the day—the day. They were leaving their birthplace, the only home they knew, to wander across country to save their twins’ asses. Strangers were more like it. The dupes had never done anything for others except look out for each other. It felt odd to be doing a good deed, or about to do a good deed. It was unlike their natural. They didn’t know what to make of it, but trusting Future-Liz, they let her guide them.

The gang piled into the vehicle, bringing barely anything with them. No one liked the car Ava had picked out. No, correction: it was a beat-up van, not a car, and they abhorred it. It had a foul smell as if homeless people had taken shelter in it once, and Lonnie was sure something was growing in the corners by the second.

“Av’, couldn’t you git like a betta car? Somethin’ betta than dis crap?” Lonnie asked.

“This van feels like it’s gonna explode under mah ass any sec,” said Zan as he focused on driving.

Ava made a ‘whatever’ face at them. “It’s a wha’—three days drive? Suck it up. We lived in shittier places than dis.”

“Yeah, dat was before. We stronger now. Dudette, we’re fuckin’ aliens. You coulda picked somethin’ betta,” said Lonnie, cringing as her hand came into contact with something sticky beside her.

Zan looked over at Liz who didn’t look pleased either. He turned back to Ava. “You bring shame to us aliens,” he said in the most serious voice ever before cracking a smile. “We may be clones and on Earth, but we still royalty, ya know.”

Ava raised her middle finger in the air with a brave “I-don’t-care” face. “Fuck you, Zan!”

“Naw, Av’, no need. I got mah Angel here for dat. She’s real good at satisfyin’ meh too,” he said with a wink to Liz who ended up squirming and blushing.

Rath rolled his eyes at the banter as Ava decided to spew sentence after sentence filled with profanities. Getting annoyed, he wondered if they would argue the entire way to Roswell and quickly in fear, he decided to do something about it. He didn’t want to hear them blabber on and on about something so stupid. He waved his glowing hand around the van, trying to clean it up with his powers. “Betta?” he asked.

Ava and Lonnie shared a look of disbelief before bursting out in laughter. “Rath, the housewife,” Lonnie chuckled out. “Ya couldn’t clean shit if it were yer ass doin’ the shittin’.”

Zan cringed and looked away. “Man, if ya ever wanna be seen as a man again, don’t do dat.” With that said, Ava and Lonnie began to do some real ‘home’ cleaning.

Zan started the car and pulled out of its parking space. Ava, Lonnie, and Rath were sitting in the back on the cushions they took from their couch while Zan and Liz were sitting in the front seats. Zan kept glancing over at his angel, worried. They left bright and early today, but since Liz woke up, she had been sort of pale and weak. She brushed it off as if it was just a simple bug, but he knew better. He tried to make her as comfortable as she could be by bringing several pillows and a blanket (reserved only for her, which kind of angered the rest of the group that he didn’t bring any for them). She felt guilty accepting them, but couldn’t help but squeal inside at Zan’s loving gesture.

“Angel,” he said, glancing off the road for a quick second. “You’s okay?”

“I’m fine, Zan,” she said, smiling at him. “Don’t worry. I’ll be fine.” She felt pretty much okay, but she couldn’t help but feel as if something had changed in her. Everything felt more in tuned as if her nerves were on fire and she was sensitive to everything. When she had woken up this morning, the light in her eyes seemed brighter than normal. The water she splashed on her face felt cooler than before. The coffee tasted bitterer. The toast felt crunchier. The steps under her feet were harder than before. She couldn’t explain it, but felt like she was really living now.

From their calculations, it would take roughly three days to get to Roswell. Thankfully these next few days were going to be clear, but chilly, skies. Rath had printed a map of the directions to Roswell from New York from the internet in the library. He hated the library only because the librarians kept giving him dirty looks like he was scum, like he was that irritating piece of gum under someone’s shoe. He never understood why he received those looks. They stared at him strangely as if he was prancing around naked in front of them, but he was wearing clothes! He had taken a look at himself to see what was wrong with him—his Mohawk was standing up proudly (not a strand misplaced), a chain hung from his belt loop, his leather vest was in place, and his tattered jeans showed just how muscular his legs were. He looked good, so what was the librarians’ problem? Lonnie had to literally drag him out of the library after the printouts were done before he could confront the elderly librarians.

“Man, I gotta piss,” said Rath as he cupped himself through his jeans.

“Dude, we haven’t even git past da tolls of N.J. yet,” Ava replied.

“Hey, when my bladder’s gotta go, its gotta go.”

With that, Lonnie smacked Rath on the side of his head. Zan cursed, feeling that they would never get there as planned. How were they going to be able to travel to the home of the Aliens when they couldn’t even act like civilized people for half an hour? Liz only smiled because it felt as if she was home. It was refreshing to see the group fight and argue, and then act like nothing had happened. They were so different from the group she knew in her timeline. Staring out the window with her head resting against her arms, she watched the trees fly by past her and listened to the group talk with a serene smile as the wind caressed her face.

If the road seemed long then, it was just the beginning. Reaching Pennsylvania four hours later, they took a bathroom break and decided to grab a bite at a trucker-friendly diner. The group, missing Zan and Liz who decided to stay in the van, stood on the line to pay for the burgers. “Fuck’s sake, if dat was only four hours, how am I goin’ last till Roswell?” cried Ava in agony, stretching out her body. Stretching had never felt so good before. She blew the purple-streaked blonde bangs out of her eyes in relief as she stood on her tippy toes, stretching her arms into the air. Her white tank top started to rise, revealing the glittering belly button piercing. This caught the attention of an oversized trucker who took off his hat and rubbed his hand across his balding head as if he was really rubbing his lower area. She grimaced and turned around, avoiding his view. “Fuck, this blows!” she said to Lonnie. “If I’m facin’ him, I’m showin’ him mah tits. If I turn ‘round, I show him mah ass.”

Sensing Ava’s frustration, she stood behind Ava, getting in the face of the trucker. Lonnie was hot—she had a killer body, luscious lips, and piercing green eyes—but when she was angry and wanted to fight, all backed down. She stood till her nose almost touched the other guy’s. “Ya starin’ at mah little sis a lil too hard there, trucker-boy. Ya got a problem?”

The trucker began to stutter, unsure whether to throw a flirtatious line at the tall blonde or to run away from her. He noticed a man in similar fashion behind her. The man was smirking at him as if he knew what was going to happen and then smacked his fist into his other open hand as if to say “Just try it and I’ll show you what’s going to happen to your face.” To save his dignity, he plopped the hat back onto his head and left; the bell above the door rang a little faster and louder than normal.

Rath smiled as the man took off with his tail between his legs. That was his girl! He dropped his arm over at Ava out of comfort. He then took out a box of cards from his vest pocket. “I got cards! Let’s play some strip poker!” It was the only thing he swiped from the gas station before they left New York. He forgot to take some porn magazines, which left him kind of sad.

“You’re such a fuckin’ ‘tard, Rath,” Ava replied. “Ain’t no one gonna strip for ya.”

“Fine, then. Regular poker?”

“Imagine playin’ cards for ten hours,” said Lonnie, making a face. What she was really saying was “Imagine playing cards with Rath from Pennsylvania to Indiana for ten hours.”

Together, the girls gave each other a distressed look. Rath made a “huh” noise in confusion as to why they were so opposed to playing cards. Paying for and grabbing the burgers, they walked back to the parked van when they noticed it was slightly rocking back and forth.

“Goddamnit, fucking horndogs!” yelled Rath, kicking the tire in anger.

Ava’s nose gave a twitch while Lonnie made a gagging noise. They chose a seat across the parking lot and sat down, eating their burgers and watching the van rock. When it finally had come to end, they aired out of the van to get rid of the sex smell and climbed back into the van with Rath taking the wheels. Lonnie moved up to the front seat with Zan, Liz, and Ava in the back. While Zan was leaning against the van’s wall, Liz cuddled up beside him.

“So how was it?” asked Ava, her eyebrow rising up in curiosity. She was asking about the sex.

Liz couldn’t stop the smile that went from ear to ear. “It was fan-fucking-tastic.”

“Damn straight!” said Zan, planting a wet kiss on his girl’s cheek.

Rath drove from Ohio to Indiana, which took roughly ten hours, only stopping for gas halfway through. He had to blast rock music in his player just to keep him up. Ten hours of sitting and absolutely no coffee—no wonder his ass was numb. Not to mention, the bathroom break in Pennsylvania didn’t do him any good. Within the first three hours of driving, he had to go again. It didn’t help very much when “Splash of Water (My Home)” by Metallica started playing on his player. Over and over again, all he heard was “Splash of water… Splash of water… Splash of water.” Once the van stopped, everyone ran out of the van and into the bathrooms.

“Oh my god, peein’ never felt sooooooo good,” groaned Ava in pleasure as she felt herself get lighter by the second as she hovered over the toliet.

“Tell me about it,” snickered Liz in the stall over.

“Hurry up, bitches. I gots to go!” screamed Lonnie, pounding on their stall doors.

Over at the men’s stall, Zan and Rath were relieving themselves with an empty wall hung urinal in between them, of course. As the noise of water streaming filled the air, Zan looked over at a closed-eyed Rath who had a hand flat against the tile wall. “You okay, man?” he smirked.

Still with his eyes closed, Rath stood up straighter and started to bend a little backwards. He replied, “Don’t talk to me. You’s interruptin’ a beautiful thing” and continued to empty his bladder. Zan laughed at the sight of Rath looking like he had just gone to heaven.

Once all satisfied, they decided to eat dinner at a local diner for about an hour. They were all tired and bored to death. Ten hours of card playing, silly arguments, and sleeping—it was more than they could handle after being cooped up in a small area for so long. They took up two booths because they all wanted room to stretch out. Rath was in his own booth while Lonnie and Ava sat across from Zan and Liz. A waitress came by and took their order.

“Ten hours!” cried Lonnie as she lowered herself further down on the chair and stretched out her legs till they collided with Liz’s.

“Ten fuckin’ hours!” growled Rath, aggravated by the boredom as he dropped his head down onto his arms. He was beyond exhausted.

Ava just let out a small whine and curled up next to Lonnie with her head resting against her friend’s shoulder. As the waitress placed their plates of food down, they dug into the food as if they hadn’t eaten in days. Liz took pity on them. If only they could will themselves to Roswell in a blink of an eye, they would. Poor guys. If I could make this easier on them, I would. Where were the spaceships when you needed them, she thought. Zan stuffed his mouth with food with one hand and his other arm was slung over her shoulder. For some reason, her burger tasted even better with Zan around.

Just as Rath took a few sips of his steaming cup of coffee goodness, Zan spoke. “Guys, no coffee. That’s gonna git ya to go some more—harder and faster. It’s a laxative too, ya know.” As soon as he processed his friend’s words, Rath spit out the coffee, making a mess of his booth. After holding his bladder for ten hours, he wasn’t ready to go through that ordeal again.

“Smart, asshole,” smirked Lonnie, running her fingers lazily through his mohawk.

When dinner was over and they filled up the gas tank, it was Liz’s turn to be behind the wheel. Ava and Lonnie were snoring softly while Rath was half-dozing off and half-listening to his Metallica albums, which gave Liz something to laugh about, seeing that Michael liked Metallica as well. Zan was leaning against the van door, watching her drive. He liked how the moonlight hit her skin, making her glow. Her eyes sparkled and her lips glimmered. She was a true goddess in his eyes.

A little unnerved by his stare, she quickly glanced over. “What?”

“You’re beautiful, ya know that?”

She blushed and grinned. “I bet you say that to all the pretty girls.”

With a wink, he replied, “I said beautiful, not pretty.” Again, she could only smile. Despite how good Zan made her feel, she felt worse physically than this morning, but she hid it well. Her stomach felt cold if it was even possible. Her eyes felt a little drier and her limbs felt a little numb. She took some aspirin and put on an I’m-well face. It helped that it was night, masking most of her semi-pale face in the dark.

Then Zan placed his hand on Liz’s hip. “What are you doing?” she hissed at him, trying to keep focused on the road. He gave her a wink and then his hand slid under her shirt where his talented fingers found her already hard nipple and gave it a pinch. Despite feeling unwell, she could not keep her body from reacting from Zan’s touch. Gasping, her hands unconsciously slipped from the steering wheel causing the van to swerve. Quickly getting her bearings back with her hands firmly on the wheel, Zan growled a “be careful” into her ear before placing wet kisses down her neck. She tried her best to keep the van on the straight road, but it was hard when an impossibly sexy man was touching her. “Zan, stop. It’s too dangerous and the others might wake up!” she hissed.

“Yeah, but isn’t it such a turn on?” he smirked as he cupped her heat through her jeans. She gasped at the pressure. “The danger of gittin’ caught, the danger that we could crash… Doesn’t dat jus’ make it all more hot?” Unsnapping her pants, his fingers dipped into her the waistband of her panties and found their way past the soft curls to her nub. Liz stared at him with frightened eyes.

“Zan, don’t—Oh god!” she moaned out as his finger made contact with her clitoris. She couldn’t stop herself from pressing her lower area harder against his finger.

“Fuck, you’re so wet,” he said in a husky voice as her juices coated his fingers. He felt the soft but hard button under his finger. Softly rubbing against it, Liz shivered and tried to keep her moans to herself. His fingers then dipped lower. Knowing what he wanted to do and unable to stop herself, she scooted lower into her seat all the while trying to drive in a straight line. His index finger sank into her wet and willing core. He could feel her clench her walls around his finger. As best as he could, he began to thrust his finger in and out of her.

“More,” she whimpered out, trying to spread her legs as wide as she can while keeping her foot on the gas pedal. She heard a groan erupt from Zan’s throat and all was forgotten as his middle finger entered her as well. She needed more. With one hand on the wheel, she placed her other hand over Zan’s, helping him. With his free hand, he traced her lips and she sucked in one of his digits. Her tongue swirled around the tip of his finger, showing what she would do to him if it was his cock in her mouth. He watched as her pink tongue darted out to caress his finger. God, how he wanted to pull them over and take her outside against the van.

As his finger fell from her mouth, he placed his hand on the steering wheel, navigating the wheels. Liz quickly dropped her hand from the steering wheel, letting Zan take control of the car. She leaned as far back as she could as Zan’s fingers found her g-spot. His fingers began to roughly and clumsily enter her. She watched as his hand move inside from outside her pants. For some reason, instead of actually seeing his hand playing with her, the image of his covered hand turned her on. She couldn’t see what was happening, but she could feel what was happening. As she heavily panted in replacement of her moans, she stared at Zan who was watching her intently. Her eyes widened at the look of lust all over his face.

“You’re so fuckin’ sexy, so fuckin’ beautiful,” he said, licking his lips at the sight of her heaving breasts. “Show me, show ‘em to me,” he ordered. Knowing exactly what he was referring to, with her free hand, she pulled down the front of her tank top, exposing her breasts to him. Once the sight of her nipples came into view, he quickly bent down to her breast, latching onto one of the brown circles. She bit into her fist to stop herself from screaming in pleasure as his teeth gently sunk down. His thumb then began to rub at her nub without breaking the rhythm of his fingers. He pulled away, taking in the sight of her wet nipple from his mouth. He captured her gaze with his.

“Zan,” she whimpered, her fist falling away from her mouth. He pressed his forehead against hers, enjoying her heavy breathing against his lips. She was so close, he could feel it. Her walls were quivering around his fingers. He then pressed down on her nub. Her body stiffened, knowing she was going to come.

“You feel so wet—soppin’ wet. Do you feel that? You’re soaking wet for me,” he growled as he felt more of her juices coating his hand. With a flick of his finger, it came. Her eyes grew wide. Her pants grew louder and heavier. She unconsciously pressed her foot down on the accelerator as her glazed eyes continued to stare into Zan’s. The van hummed with speed, the engine growing rowdier. She rode his hand till she could no longer handle it anymore. He enjoyed the fearful look that darted across her face when she was about to come. He relished how she panted her orgasm out in order not to wake the others with screams. He loved the sight and feeling of her body. When she recovered, he removed his fingers from her. She lessened the pressure on the pedal and placed her shaking hands on the steering wheel again, trying her damn best to focus on the road. He popped his fingers into his mouth and licked them. “Tasty,” he smirked with a wink. Liz could only fluster.

When they reached the border of Oklahoma, which was five and half hours later, Lonnie took the wheel. She took a look in the back and saw that everyone was sleeping—Liz was cuddled face first into Zan with her legs tangled with his and one of her hands on her stomach. Zan’s arm was slung over Liz protectively with his other hand cupping her ass to him. Ava was sleeping behind Rath with her knee digging into his back, which caused Rath to yell out in his sleep and unconsciously hit Ava every once in a while. Focusing her eyes back on the road, Lonnie groaned at the endless darkness in front of her.

“Lucky bastards,” she said, wanting to go back to sleep herself. Shivering at the cold, she placed her hand over the vents and made the heat blast out. When she got the halfway to Oklahoma, she stopped at a gas station, filling up the fuel. She didn’t bother to wake the others, almost enjoying the serene sight, but mostly because she didn’t want to hear another argument between Rath and Ava. She continued to drive till they got to Amarillo, Texas. She couldn’t help but snort when she saw a sign on the way that read, “The road does not end.”

“You’s tellin’ me,” she said to herself, feeling as if the road kept on going and going.

A little past Amarillo, it was Ava’s turn. As she lazily rubbed her eyes, she took in the sight of nature all around her. She never saw this kind of view before. It was all buildings and cars in New York. It was all grass, trees, and rocks. To Ava, the city life she once knew never felt further away before. She drove through Canyon in the Randall County of Texas. Liz woke up just in time to see the welcome sign of Hereford. Her head pounded like a migraine. She ached all over the place. Yep, she was feeling a lot worse than yesterday. Detaching herself from Zan’s arm, she stood up as much as she could in the van, ignoring the pain in her empty stomach. She placed her hand on Ava’s shoulder and gave her a weak smile.

“Ava, can we take a detour? I want to show you guys something.”

She nodded and with Liz’s instruction, she drove them to Earth, Texas in an hour. The sun was starting to rise in the morning sky. It was a beautiful sight. It wasn’t something one could see in New York. The land seemed to go on and on, and the sky was so vast. The clouds looked like dollops of whip cream. The grass swayed gently with the breeze. When they got to where Liz wanted to go, she woke up everyone else when they were at the border of Earth.

“Where are we?” said Rath, rubbing his eyes as he stumbled out of the van, still groggy.

Liz smiled and replied, “Earth.”

“Ha ha, very funny. I know we on Earth, idiot,” he said, shoving Liz.

Hearing Liz’s yelp, Ava pointed to the sign and came to her defense. “No, you jerk, the location is called Earth.”

Squinting at the sign, he shouted, “Population 1,109! Aren’t peeps fuckin' in dis town?”

Lonnie and Ava only ignored Rath—they were far too used to his stupidity. Liz appeared behind Zan, slipping her hand into his as he stared at the sign before him. Reaching out, he traced the words: “Welcome to Earth.” He could only smile and kiss Liz, letting her know how much he loved her bringing him here. Liz knew the gang never felt at home on Earth, the planet. They weren’t welcomed with open arms and they had a tough life. They were left alone on a planet not like their own, left without answers as to who they were and why they had powers, left to fend for only themselves. This was just something she could give to them before she left. Something to show them that Earth was their home.

“Thank you, Liz,” he whispered against her lips.

She pulled away to look into his eyes. “I love you, Zan. Don’t forget that.”

“I won’t.”

“She’ll love you too.”

Zan blinked. “Who? What are ya talkin’ ‘bout?”

Liz knew she didn’t have long. She finally understood why she was in pain. The numbness in her stomach was spreading to throughout her body. Her knees felt as if they were ready to buckle any second. Her body felt icy. “She will love you too,” she gasped as the tremors erupted within her.

“Liz, what are ya talkin’ about? What are you talking about!” he yelled, growing increasingly angry. He didn’t know what Liz was trying to tell him. What is she talking about, he thought.

Then her knees finally gave out. She fell down, clutching onto her stomach. She wondered if it had been this painful when her Max disappeared. But this can’t be! They hadn’t even made it to Roswell yet. They haven’t even—there was no possible way they already changed the future just by heading to Roswell. Something else was wrong. This wasn’t supposed to happen this early. Something was wrong! She wasn’t ready to go. She wasn’t ready! Oh god, she wasn’t ready to die!

“LIZ!” cried Zan, falling down with her.

The gang watched with worry etched on their faces. One minute they were fine and joking around; the next they saw their King and his lover on the ground.

“Oh god, I wish I had more time,” she said weakly, clutching onto Zan’s arms. Please, not yet. Please, give me more time, she silently pleaded to the Gods. I’m not ready! Oh god, what about the b—

“No, Liz, NO!”

As she fought against ceasing, she could feel the beads of sweat slid down her face. Or were those her tears? Wiping her face with her sooty hand, she had to accept this was the coming now. This was the end. This was meant to be. She didn’t want to leave this—him—but this was what she was meant to do. This wasn’t her life. She didn’t belong here. She had to let him know, before it was too late. She had to tell him. “I wish… I wish things turned out differently.”

Zan held her in his hands, his thumbs wiping away her tears. His face was just as wet at Liz’s. He knew what was happening and he didn’t want it to happen. It was too early! He thought they had more time. He wasn’t ready. “Angel, no! Baby, no, I love you,” he cried.

“She will love you and she will give you the greatest gift ever,” she weakly smiled through the shooting pain.

“No, don’t talk. Please, please, don’t leave me, please,” cried Zan as he held Liz in his arms. Liz tried to memorize his face and as she tilted her face up to kiss him one last time, she disappeared before her lips could reach his. Zan felt his arms fold in together—he was hugging nothing but air.

“NOOOOO!” screamed Zan. His eyes darted everywhere for her but she was nowhere to be seen. She was gone. Gone. Seeing their king in pain and in need of comfort, Ava and Lonnie wrapped their arms around him. They tried to settle him down, but he was adamant on struggling against them as if they were the ones that took Liz away. “NOOOOO!” he continued to scream. He howled towards the sky in agony, causing the Earth sign to snap off in half and the wheels of the van exploded. As everything erupted around them, Zan could only keep screaming. The girls tried to soothe him, but Zan was too distraught, too far gone. Rath just sat on the ground, stunned that Liz was gone. It was a blow to the stomach for all of them, but clearly for Zan, he lost the love of his life. He, of course, was the one who took it the hardest. Clearing his dry throat amidst the screams, Rath remembered before they left their home in New York, Liz had told him what to do.

Flashback: Liz quietly snuck up behind Rath who was curiously staring at a Playboy magazine. She watched as he tilted the magazine to the side and pulled out a poster of a big-breasted blonde girl with pink lips. Just as he was about to whistle at the naked woman, a voice spoke from behind him.

“Wishing that was Lonnie?” she said, breaking the silence.

Rath let out a yell, scrambling to hide the magazine when he caught sight of Liz. “What! What? NO!” he said, nervously. Porn was not something he wanted to look at with his so-called sister in the room.

Liz could only laugh. She kneeled down in front of him, placing her hands on his knees with a funny smile. Then Rath began to look everywhere else but Liz. “Uhhh, Liz, you lookin’ tight and all, but I don’t want ya blowin’ me,” said Rath, pretending to rub his hands against his jeans only to really push Liz’s hands off his legs.

She slapped him on the arm. “Shut up, Rath! I’m not going to blow you. I just need to talk, okay?”

“What about?”

“Zan needs you.”

“Needs meh now?”

“No, but he needs you by his side.”

“Durrf, I’m always by his side.”

“No, I mean… Rath! Listen carefully. When you guys succeed, I’m going to disappear like I never came here in the first place. When I’m gone, Zan will need you.”

He intently watched Liz. He saw that she was struggling not to think too much about disappearing, but she had to. She was thinking ahead, she was thinking of Zan’s best interest. “Zan will need you when everything to him seems bleak, seems hopeless. Promise me, Rath. Promise me you’ll be there for him to help him back on his feet. You’ll help guide him to do the right thing. Promise me.”

He took her hands in his and held them with a reassuring grip. “I promise, Liz. I promise.”

Liz had prepared him that day, letting him know what he had to do. So he stood up, pushed the two girls aside, and placed his hands on either side of Zan’s shoulder, getting his friend to focus on him.

“Zan! Zan!” he yelled into Zan’s face, getting his attention. “She’s gone,” he said.

“I want her back!”

“I do too, but she gone. Gone.”

Zan choked on his cry. “I love her. I didn’t get a chance to tell it to her more. I love her!”

“I know ya do. I know ya do and she knows too. Zan, trust me, she knows more than you think. But she wouldn’t want ya to be like dis. We came here to do a mission and we’s goin’ to accomplish dat, okay, fearless leader? She wouldn’t want her death to be for nothing. Okay, duke? Ya hear me?”

Zan nodded his head, trying to calm himself down as Rath’s words seeped into his brain. Rath wasn’t as cold-hearted as most thought. In the short time he knew Liz, he had grown to love her as his little sister. But life was tough and he knew that. His heart broke when she vanished before his eyes, but it was his job to snap Zan back to reality, to keep Zan balanced, to keep Zan in a leadership-mode.

Zan and Rath let themselves be embraced by a tearful Ava and Lonnie. They lost someone they cared for dearly today; they would need a moment to get their bearings.

Ava looked up at the bright sunny sky. How it contrasted them in this moment. She wanted to scream just like Zan had. It wasn’t fair. Liz didn’t deserve to disappear like that. Liz was one of the kindest people she had ever met. She did not deserve any of this.

Lonnie found comfort in Rath’s arms. She knew Liz was going to be gone. She prepared herself for this, but still, she could not stop the tears from coming.

After two hours of tears, silence, and sitting on the side of the road, a silent Zan stood up and fixed the wheels. Without a word among the group, he drove them from Earth, Texas to Roswell, New Mexico in three hours.

To be continued.
Ask yourselves this while you wait for the next chapter: what happened to cause Future-Liz to disappear early?

[kyliemou]

Thanks to: Shiesty23, tinie38, KiaraAlexisKlay (x3), Egyptian_Kiss, paper, forever dreamer, totallizfan, kay_b, jake17, Natalie36, roswell3053, Zanssoulmate08, JRose, beautifyldreamer, and ruthandnina.

Q&A:

Okay, I'm a little better now.
Wow, I hadn't had a fic hit me that hard since reading one of DMartinez's stories whos title eludes me at the moment.

and

Come Back!!! I need more! Jordin Sparks says it so eloquently with Chris Brown: Tell me how am I supposed to breathe with no air? This story is my air and breath.....I wanna see the meet up between Present Liz and the New Yorkers...and see how they react to the POD people reacting to Liz.... *pouts* Please?

Wow, to be somewhat in the near standings near DMartinez is a big honor. I've read her stories and I loved them. Thank you so much for your feedback! And don't worry: here's your new chapter. Now I think it's just the matter of you waiting for the next chapter.

Don't worry, I won't pressure you to post a new one ASAP, like some people do, *cough*you*cough*. Hmmm, maybe I could use this to my advantage, I'll post when you post.

Kay, don't you realize it's my job to pressure people for a new chapter? Go post something now!

OMG !!!!!!! How the hell did I miss this update!!!!!!! I was never notified !!!!! IM going to go hide in the corner after I leave my feed back in shame!!!!! But omg the heartwrenching end !! just amazing... you wrote that just brilliantly! seriously you are so talented! You just ripped my heart out! How she disappeared before their lips touched ... good god woman that was just a killer!!!!!!!!! You have a serious gem going here...you should be so freaking proud of yourself ...you've managed to combined so many emotions in one story! How do you do it! I seriously can believe I didn't see this till now...
You've out done yourself with this one sweetie... I'm blown away... You've left us all dying to see what happens next... beautiful job! and don't wait for me to come back ... I think you scared my muse away! Love, Carrie

OMG, Carrie, you're such a hoot (does anyone still say this? I gotta stop talking like I'm sixty -_-*). I adore you! I'm quite evil and for some reason, I felt her disappearing before they could kiss was perfect. It wasn't too clichéd or anything. Thank you for your amazing words. It's people like you that I keep writing for. Hopefully I didn't scare your muse away too badly. I need you to continue your amazing stories! If you should ever stop posting, I shall too!

Are you TRYING to make us cry? That was heartbreaking and beautiful and I hope to God that Present Liz and Zan get to experience that kind of love. -Sarah

I do believe it's my job to make people cry. I always have a thing for sad stories.

Awesome update! You fit romance, comedy, heart wrenching sadness and alien craziness all in one update lol Keep it coming! Jrose @--->

Thanks! I was wondering if that was too much for one chapter for a reader to handle. I was considering on cutting it down, but I hate short posts.

usually i avoid the unconventional couples forum like the plague, but this story caught my eye and i'm so glad it did! Can't wait to see where you go with this!

Aw, thanks for reading and thank you for your kind words. I hope you continue enjoying this story!





Author's Note: Two finals down, two more to go. I should definitely be studying, but how can I when I came down with a really bad cold? And how can I stay away from the Roswell fandom?! I enjoyed reading all the feedback, especially what some of you thought on what happened to Future-Liz. Some of you were somewhat on the dot and some of you gave me new ideas. Read on to find why Future-Liz disappeared early!
Sorry for this being clichéd, but I have only one thing to say: Please don’t kill me and don't give up on this story!

There are lines from “Meet The Dupes” (Season 2, Episode . Please pay attention to the dates.





Chapter Twelve:

She's upset.
Bad day.
Heads for the dresser drawer to drive her pain away.
Nothing good can come of this.
She opens it. There's nothing.
There is only left over tears…

Then she closed her eyes and found relief in a knife.
The blood flows as she cries.

All alone, the way she feels.
Left alone to deal with all the pain-drenched sorrow relief.
Bite the lip just forget the bleeding.

Then she closed her eyes and found relief in a knife.
The blood flows as she cries.

Curled up, she's on the floor.
Relief left her.
She had hoped for something more from it,
(Hoped for something more) from it.
He leans down to comfort her.
She is weeping and he wraps his arms around,
and around, and around, and...

The deeper you cut, the deeper I hurt.
The deeper you cut, it only gets worse.

Now she's slowly opening...
Yeah, she's slowly opening...
New eyes...

Then she opened her eyes
and found relief through his life,
and put down her knives.

Then she opened her life
and found relief through his eyes,
and put down,
she put down her life.
“The Way She Feels,” Between The Trees.

December 15, 2000, Friday; Roswell, New Mexico:

Liz was lying down on her lawn chair, staring up at the glittery but tar pitted sky on her balcony. Her parents had gone off to a trip—something about seeing Venus in the sky. That meant she had the house to herself—all completely to herself. She shuddered at the thought. Empty was her house. It was quiet, dark—perhaps too quiet and too dark—and it frightened her. If her home had mice, she would’ve heard them squeaking about, but there weren’t any. If she were pacing in her home, she would only hear her footsteps but instead she heard every single sound that came from outside her home. The tires of the single car driving down the wet pavement sounded as if she was underneath the car, being dragged along for the ride. The few chirps of grasshoppers irritated her like a song stuck in her head. Even the breeze annoyed her—she borderlined on warm and cold.

Looking around her, without even having to realize it, she knew she was alone. How did I end up like this, she thought to herself with a sigh. She wasn’t talking about her parents. She was talking about everyone else in her life. But she knew the reason why. She just didn’t want to believe it. She didn’t want to face it for the pain was too much for her to bear. If she had a choice, would she really stab herself in the eye with a pen just to face reality? No, she wouldn’t. She would rather make it quick and easy like a bandaid so she could start healing as soon as possible.

While the stars twinkled, instead of being in awe of its beauty, she felt the stars mocked her. They gleamed at her with such happiness while she was in a state of agony. Tapping the pen in her hand lightly against her open journal on her lap, she glanced down at the black ink that was scribbled all over the gold lines with great big blots after each period—thought pauses, that’s what they were. The radio hummed softly in the background, playing only, oh the irony, depressing music.

It had almost been a month since Future-Max visited her. Who knew a simple act would bring about so much pain? He had good intentions and that was to save his family and friends, but when he went to the past to change things, he made things worse for Liz. Granted it was better than everyone dying, but it was too soon to tell. What if this future was worse than Future-Max’s lifetime? What if Tess still left? What if everyone died anyway? She sighed. There was no way Future-Max would have wanted this for her.

Once the rest of the group had found out what happened (it was only a matter of time before Michael told Maria, and Maria told Alex), the group quickly moved away from Liz like pepper in contact with dish soap. In their eyes, she was at fault. They all knew how Max and Liz felt about one another, but Liz sleeping with Kyle? It was so unlike her and this caused them to question if they really knew her in the first place. They didn’t shun her completely, but they didn’t come find her as much either. They still talked to her whenever they saw each other; it was more as respectful greetings. Alex and Maria tried to get her to open up (Kyle was smart to stay away for a while), but Liz was persistent on remaining silent. Sometimes, she just wanted to literally sewn her mouth shut just so they could see that she wouldn’t tell them, that she would never tell them. Soon, the topic lingered in the air, unsaid. No one wanted to talk about it. Max was hurt by Liz’s action and Liz was hurt by her own actions. No one wanted to pour salt on the wound, so to speak.

Liz never meant for Max to see what took place between her and Future-Max. She couldn’t even imagine what he must be feeling or thinking. The first thing that came to her mind was if he had seen Future-Max’s face, but he hadn’t. He hadn’t.

Flashback: Liz hated the fact that everything was turning to a mess again. She and Max had finally gotten slightly better. They were going to be friends again, but then… Damn the flashes! What was this connection she had with Max? What was this spark that allowed him to dive into her most private thoughts and memories? Wanting to fix things, she gathered the courage to walk to the Evans’ place. She wanted to… God, how she wanted to tell him the truth, how she wanted to embrace him in her arms, how she wanted to kiss his pain away, but she knew she couldn’t. This was all so repetitive. She just wanted to be free from everything. She just wanted him to know. She just wanted him. It was all so simple, wasn’t it? Just tell him and finally be happy, but life wasn’t that kind. Murphy’s Law really does apply to me, thought Liz. She couldn’t tell him. She wouldn’t tell him.

Wiping her sweaty hand against her jeans, she lightly knocked on Max’s window. Was that too light? Did Max hear that? Should she knock again? Time seemed to move slow when her knuckles connected with the glass, but then there was a rustle from the inside. She held her breath and the window flew open. Max stared at her with surprise and then his face hardened over, remembering exactly what she did. It was that same look he gave her when he saw that she “slept” with Kyle. It was a vicious cycle over and over again. How many times did she hurt him already? How many more times will she have to hurt him?

“What do you want?” he said, his voice devoid of all emotions but anger.

She took in his shirtless state. Had it been that long ago since her hand was pressed up against his muscular back and his warm chest against her own skin? Had it been that long since her fingers playfully ran through his soft hair? Had it been that long since they stared into each other’s eyes for hours? Had it been that long since she was kissing those luscious lips in Michael’s apartment? Had it been that long ago?

“Well?” he said, annoyed at her silence and stare.

Licking her cracked lips, she looked down at her feet and back at him. “I hate this, Max! I hate that we can’t even be around each other. Long before all this, we were friends. We talked. We laughed. I don’t understand why we just can’t go back to that.”

He shook his head in disbelief. “We can’t. I can’t.”

“I know what I did and I know you’re hurting. Max, I just… Remember you said you were going to let me go? That you were going to let me grow? What happened to that?”

“I guess I realized I can’t go back.”

“Max, please. Don’t do this to us.”

“I just… I need time.”

That was something. Time—she could give him that. Time—it was all she had. Time—it was better than him completely denying her his friendship. If he did, how could she survive? She would always love him and he would never know, but having him around… that was enough. Time—yes, she would give him that.

“Okay, I understand that. I do. I can respect it.”

Seconds passed. Was there really nothing left to be said, she asked herself. She had so much that she wanted to tell him. It was all she could think of as she slowly walked here. What did she want to tell him? Sensing there was nothing left to say, Max started to shut the window. Just as it was about to clasp into the hinge, she remembered. Her hand thrust out and wedged in between the wall and the window frame.

“Max, I need to ask you something. Did you see… Can you tell me what you saw?”

He took a step back and scowled at her. “How can you ask me that, Liz?”

“Please, Max, I need to know.”

“You want to know? You really want to know?” he yelled at her.

Liz flinched at his tone. She could understand his anger. If she were in his position, she would be mad as well. “Please, I have to know.”

“God, Liz! What I saw was—Goddamnit, Liz! I saw you fuck some other guy that’s not Kyle. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

He didn’t see Kyle. He didn’t see Future-Max! Was she really that damn lucky? Could fate be showing mercy on her? Could it really be that easy? “But did you see his face?” she asked. God, it pained her to see him in such emotional turmoil. She hated this, but she had to do it.

“Fuck! What are you trying to pull, Liz?! Did you want me to see his face?” Liz was tempted to tell him yes, but she bit her tongue. “No, Liz, I didn’t. I didn’t see his face. Instead, I saw his back. His fucking back moving while he was—while you were—FUCK, LIZ!”

She let out a rush of air that she had been holding, but immediately regretted it when Max saw it. She saw the window frame tremble and noticed Max’s hand was no longer on it. It was his powers. “I don’t understand you, Liz. I don’t. You say you love me and then you sleep with Kyle? And then I find out it wasn’t just him, but someone else? I—I…” He shook his head. Walking to his drawer, he pulled a box out and handed it to Liz. “You said you wanted to be friends. Well, I thought about it. I realized that I can’t be friends with you.”

“Max, please don’t—“

“I’m still in love with you and I don’t know how to forgive you. I’m still hanging on to you, to what we had, and I know it will never be the same. So let’s make a clean break, right here. I can’t do this with you, Liz.”

Liz opened the box and saw it was the pocket knife she had given him last Christmas. “Max, this is yours. I gave it to you last Christmas.”

“I’m giving it back.”

“Max, I don’t want you to hate me.”

“Well, I guess that’s the problem, Liz.” Then the window slammed shut in her face, leaving Liz standing in the dark.

She thanked the gods for that he hadn’t seen Future-Max’s face. Now the price she was paying was the loss of Max’s friendship. Everything she had done, everything Future-Max had done, would have been ruined. She made note to herself to be careful when coming in close contact with Max, but that was easy now. Max wanted nothing to do with her and Tess took her place. She was everywhere he was, comforting him. It disgusted Liz to no ends, but this was meant to be.

She wished Future-Max had never come. She longed for what she was supposed to have—a marriage with Max Evans, the love of her life.

Flash: “Come on, guys!” cried Liz as she danced in Max’s arms in the desert under the starry night.

“Liz, we’re tired,” said Alex as he laid sleeping Isabel into the back seat of a convertible.

“But this is our wedding night!” said Max, laughing as he twirled Liz. “This is the happiest moment of our lives. We should be celebrating!”

“Maxwell, we’ve been celebrating for hours! We’re happy for you, but sorry if some of us don’t have the strength to keep up,” Michael said as he placed an arm around Maria, angling her so her head rested against his shoulder as they leaned up against the car.

Max chuckled and smiled down at his bride. “You guys are such party-poopers! We don’t need them, do we, Liz?”

Liz shook her head, her face still plastered with the same enormous smile since she said, “I do.” She curled her arms around her husband’s neck and pressed her lips against his. “No, we don’t. We have each other.”

“And that’s all that matters,” he said, his lips brushing against hers. Their lips found a rhythm and under the starry night, they were finally one.

That was how her life was supposed to turn out, but that marriage would only end in death. No matter how much Liz hated wishing for her marriage, deep down she was glad Future-Max had done what he had done. Lives would be saved, but she bet he didn’t know how severe the repercussions of his actions would be. Better than death, she guessed.

Liz was sure the gods were secretly laughing at her. “What have I ever done to you? What did I do to deserve this?” she asked the stars, trying to keep herself from screaming. She began to regret everything that had happened since the day Max had saved her. She wondered what life would be if Max hadn’t stopped her from dying, if she had died. No one would even suspect aliens were involved in the shooting. Max, Michael, and Isabel would have been safe. Who knows, maybe Tess would have never showed up. Then the whole destiny crap would’ve been long forgotten. Everything would stay the time. Just another life of small town girl at the wrong place, at the wrong time—this sounded better than right now.

Closing her journal, she slipped into window, and placed the book in the secret space of her brick wall in her bedroom. She walked into the bathroom and quick became disgusted with the sight of herself in her cabinet mirror. God, who was she? Who was this person staring back at her? Who was this person with the black bags under her eyes? Who was this person with the permanent lines across her forehead? Just who was this person? No wonder she felt like she was crawling out of her skin. She was trapped in another body. Turning on the faucet, she placed the stopper on the drain and let the water rise. She treaded her fingers against the warm water, lost in thought.

So much had happened in such a short period of time. Had it really only been a month, just one month? Liz was trying her best to keep sane, to stay grounded, but all her feelings were overwhelming and they took a toll on her physical state. She constantly had headaches and she still wasn’t getting enough sleep. Her dreams… they were memories of Future-Max, she was sure of it. Like before, she still couldn’t make anything out but just feelings. But every once in a while, when she comes into contact of a certain object that held significant meaning to Future-Max, she would get flashes of what happened surrounding that object. She hated them because they only reminded her of what wasn’t meant to be. With the replaying of all these scattered memories, Liz was beginning to wonder what her true feelings were and what were of Future-Max’s. The fact that she knew what killing someone felt like didn’t help. The grip and thrusting power of a weapon in her hand, the warm blood soaking her skin… It was as if death surrounded her no matter how far she ran.

She couldn’t help but wonder what Future-Max was thinking as he had laid beside her, waiting to disappear into thin air. Did he think about his past life? About his wife, the future version of her? Did he regret what they did that night or was he just as happy as she was? Did he think about what the new future would bring? Did he wish he had never come back to the past? She wondered if he had been just resting beside her when he disappeared or whether his arms was wrapped around her when he did. She often shuddered when she thought about this, wondering what she would have thought about if she were in his position. God, how much she wanted to see him in his last moments before he left her. But what would she have done? She would’ve held him and cried. She would’ve kissed him till he was gone. She would’ve tried to make love with one him last time out of desperation, hoping to keep him there with her a little longer. She would’ve told him again just how much she loved him. But she couldn’t. Instead it felt too much like a dream. Worse, like an amazing one night stand that ended badly like all one night stands.

Tugging off her clothes, she slid into the cool tub and leaned against the back end of the white porcelain. She rested in the clear warm water, letting her hands splash lightly against the liquid. The warmness of the water soothed her aching body. She could feel all the dirtiness wash away. Rubbing her feet together, she stared at her naked body under the water. Who did this body belong to? Her hand passed over her face as if she was trying to rub the tiredness from her eyes.

She let herself slip into the water till she was submerged in the water, lying almost flat on the bottom. Small air bubbles floated from her mouth as she stared upwards. Everything was hazy and blurry, but she could make out her bathroom. She reached her hand up towards the surface but didn’t go beyond to break the surface. This was how she felt—she was caught between a glass wall or a prison, unable to break free, like she was drowning, unable to breathe. She felt like everything was moving faster than she was as if she was stuck on pause. No matter how hard she tried to break free, everything only seemed to get worse. Take Max and her for instance. They were fine. They were getting along, but then the flashes came and now Max refused to even look at her. He wanted absolutely nothing to do with her. Love—he loved her since the third grade. Love—she found out too late and now it was gone. Love—even love wasn’t enough.

When her lungs burned and cried for air, she rose up from the water, resting up against the back of the tub once again, slicking her hair back. How much more could she take? As she gasped for air, she couldn’t help but roll her eyes at the ridiculousness of the situation. Reaching for the shaving cream and the razor, she propped her leg on the edge of the porcelain boat. She lathered her leg in the gel and began to shave her leg. Then frightened by the phone ringing, she accidentally nicked her leg. Dropping the razor into the water, her hand clamped around the cut. She watched as a thin trail of blood flowed down her leg and from between her fingers.

The phone continued to ring in her room. She was too tired, too lazy to go get it so she let it ring. “God damn it!” she screamed, slapping her hand against the surface of the water, letting it spill out of the tub, as her leg submerged back into the water. The blood disappeared when the water ratio increased. Life wasn’t fair and Liz knew that. But at this moment, she felt like everything was against her. Nothing seemed to be going her way. She felt like she was the only one in the world in such pain. Actually, she probably was. Who else knew about the aliens? Who else had their future would-have-been husband visit them? In midst of her thoughts, Liz hadn’t even noticed when she started to cry. The tears wouldn’t stop flowing and she couldn’t stop. She choked back a sob as the familiar song began to play on the radio.

Shaking her in disbelief to the melody, she sang softly along with the song: “Into the brave new world, I hope I see you on the other side of this changing world.” Brave, she was not. New and changing world—yes, it was. The other side seemed like a better place than here.

All these questions, all these ramblings—they all led to the same time, to the same emotion. She didn’t want to live like this anymore. She was constantly in fear, in pain, and in sadness. She was tired and worn out. She didn’t deserve this, none of this. What did she do that was so terribly that she had to be punished like this? She was just a simple small town girl, doing what the love of her life wanted. Why did so many things have to go wrong? Why her? What was so horrible or special about her that she had to go through all this? God, if only Grandma Claudia was still around. She was probably the only person who can give her a true insight on everything. She was the only person she could trust to talk to. But Grandma Claudia was dead. Her parents were as clueless to everything. Maria and Alex are innocent bystanders and she couldn’t risk having them carry her burden. Kyle would be a bad idea. Isabel and Michael would never understand. Max? Definitely not. Tess would be like selling her soul to the devil for free. Just who did she have that she could talk to? Who did she have left in her life?

Staring at the cut on her leg, she made her decision. She had seen the movies, read the books, heard the stories. Before, she would have never even considered it. Before, she would have thought it was stupidity and sheer cowardliness to do it. But now in this situation, she wondered if others could do it, why couldn’t she? If Max is supposed to be with Tess, who was she supposed to be with now? What was stopping her? What was the point in living? She gathered all her courage up and quickly grabbed her razor. She pushed the handle away from the razor piece and dropped it to the tile floor. It seemed so easy, almost too easy. Could she do it? Could she? Then as she held her breath, gathering all the courage she had, with one quick swoop, she nicked herself in the wrist. The four blades made the cut easily enough for the blood to quickly drip down her arm as if they were trailing down a vein. Fascinated, she watched as the blood droplets hit the water, spreading like blobs of ink. It was darker than she had imagined—brick red. No, it was crimson red. This wasn’t the corn syrup and red dye seen in the movies. This was the real thing—this was real blood. The odd thing was it hadn’t hurt. Perhaps her emotional pain ratio was too more than the physical pain. In fact, she felt almost better. Watching the blood flow from her, she felt as if she was being freed. She was being bled of her demons.

So she made another slit on her other wrist. Just as quickly as the other, the blood dripped into the water. Her hands flew to her mouth. She couldn’t stop the laughter that escaped from deep within her, but there were still tears on her face. She laughed and laughed like a hysterical person. If only Future-Max could see her now, see how weak she was, that she wasn’t as strong as she had been in his timeline. Wiping away the tears, the laughter soon died out. She was quiet, calm and steady. She was getting tired now. Her eyes started to feel heavy.

She was on a high. She hadn’t felt so good in ages. Her eyes slowly drooped down and opened again. One arm hung over the rim of the tub while the other was soaked in water. She bathed in the crimson mess. There was so much blood. She could be the next Countess Elizabeth Bathory, the Blood Countess. With this amount of blood so large, she wondered instead of just looking young if she would be reborn again.

Maybe she could have a chance at a new life, somewhere different and new, just like that song—“Into the brave new world.” She could finally be happy. She could—… Where did the thought go? She could be—… Why couldn’t she think clearly anymore? In her new life, she would—… What was happening? With her new life, she would go—… Before she could question where her brain suddenly went, her eyes fell shut and she could no longer find the strength to open them again.

To be continued.
The song is “Brave New World” by Richard Ashcroft. Oh no, what have I done?

[kyliemou]

Feedbackers, you turn an unhappy day to a joyous one: jake17, tinie38, ruthandnina, forever dreamer, paper, KiaraAlexisKlay, kay_b, elizasere, roswellian love (x2), XYZ, and roswell3053..

Q&A:

You've written another beautiful amazing update of course... ok I just have to say reading the first part I kept thinking ... wow so heartbreaking and painful... you're a poet... then the end whoa...

Carrie, thank you so much for your words. They bring me so much happiness, you can't even imagine!

I went into your little hint relating to the various times and then I understand it.

Congrats on picking this clue up, Ruth! Oh, and as to your "Am I right?" question, sometimes I feel you are too smart for me. ;P Careful or you might ruin all the good fun! Hehe.

You wouldn't do that to us, I mean its just cruel to leave it there and make us think what we're thinking right now. Hmm... The more I read this the more of a tool Max becomes for me. I actually want him to be with the gerbil just so he'll let Liz get with Zan. I get that he's hurting and feels betrayed and all that, but still, they weren't together at the time and why should it change anything between them? That always annoyed me in the series, where it was this huge betrayal, made me stoppoing feeling the love for Max.

After you read this chapter, I think you will find me very cruel. =P Hmm, that's not good because I love Max. Yes, I have been making him sort of an ass, but don't worry. I'll put him in good light when I feel like he deserves it. Oh man, I nearly died when Max slept with Tess in the show. I was ready to quit, but obviously I couldn't. Ugh, it was one of those moments I wish to forget about the show. Think of my Max the tool moment as Ross and Rachel (from Friends): they were/weren't on a break.

What if Max didn't heal her? What if whoever was on the phone, arrived & got her to the hospital, but Max wouldn't come to help. She could have recovered on her own, but the dream would be dead forever.

Ooooo, ideas! *gets started on the next chapter*

Kylie you did it again. I hope you feel better...better enough to get the next chapter out! Amazing. Someone is going to find her right? Better not be Max (da ass)...even if I do feel kinda sorry for him. Kinda being the operative word.

Hahaha, your feedback left me breathless. Not two slaps, but three? Gosh, I didn't realize last chapter was that extreme! I went to the doctor, school finals are over (anxiously awaiting grades and summer school to begin), and I am feeling loads better. The writers really tried to do a number on Max. I sympathized yet hated him all at the same time. I'll do my best to make you love him again. It's only right because they're the original OTP (yes, I realize original repeats twice, but it needs that emphasis!).

But seriously, are you laughing now that you have successfully achieved at torturing your readers? Why did you end it there? WHY?!!!

Cliffhangers are fun, Kay! You should know because you always leave your chapters on them as well. GRRRRR! Payback is a bitch, honey.

I've been reading this for 2 hours already and gotta say I'm hooked big time

I came back, no worries! Wow, two hours? Glad to have reeled you into my world!

I love it that you engage the dupes to be part of saving the planet than rather have them be the bad guys.

Hi, J! For me, there aren't enough stories that really dive into the characters of the dupes. I hope to succeed this in my story. I feel they deserve it. Too many holes left in the show, it about drove me nutters!

I will come back with more feedback in a few...

*gasp* Where's the rest? Hahaha, joke!






Author's Note: Forgive me for this part being late. I had finished my finals last week, but I was slightly discouraged from my writing. Don't ask why. It's my lack of confidence kicking in. Or was it my laziness now that school has semi-finished for me? *sighs* Forgive me if this chapter slightly lacks what my previous chapters have. I'm a bit pooped out and it's hard to try to keep up or top the previous chapters. Originally this was one long part, but to get the full feeling of this section of the chapter, I felt it would be best if it were in its own post.

As some of you picked up (if you didn't, read this), in the last chapter where Liz cuts herself, the date was December 15, 2000, Friday. If you remember from the last, last chapter (Chapter 11), Zan and the gang left on December 16-18, 2000, Saturday-Monday. This is why I leave the same note in my author's note on every chapter posting: Pay attention to the dates. They play a key part! Well, they do till I eventually feel they don't matter as much anymore. Heh.






Chapter Thirteen - Part A:

Don't you feel so very pointless in the feelin' of the rain and the violence of the sun?
I must confess that I feel graciously bigger than the rain and hotter than the sun.
What do you do, what do you say when the blood you've spilled is of your loved one,
and the kremlins of the world fall all around you?

We deal in dreams.
We deal in dreams.
We deal in structures that grow cold in our hearts.

Oh fearful crying people,
the fool is by the river, watching but not swimming.
It takes energy not to get used to it
and fall into this place
where everything runs together and dies.
This quiet kingdom, she is now
and forever will she be in silent celebration.

We deal in dreams.
We deal in dreams.
We deal in structures that grow cold in our hearts.
“We Deal in Dreams,” Live.

December 15, 2000, Friday; Roswell, New Mexico:

Drip.
Drop.

Drip.
Drop.

The sound of droplets was deafening. The water was calm despite its rippling effect. The cool breeze came rolling in from the small crack of the window. All seemed calm, but looks could be deceiving. There was no sound other than the water and it was the echo of the drops that Liz first heard when her eyes opened. Groggy, she found herself soaking in her bathtub. What time was it—was it morning, evening, night? How did she get here? When had she undressed herself? Why was she in her tub? As the questions came pounding into her head, she realized she couldn’t remember. The light bulb above her was flickering as if there was an electric malfunction causing the bulb to rapidly blink. As she analyzed her surroundings, she tried to remember what happened to her. It felt as if she had lost hours of her life, had a blackout, or even sleepwalked. The water was clear and not bloody like she had last remembered. Wait, bloody water? Why would the water be red? Why blood?

Drip.
Drop.

Adjusting to her position, she realized she couldn’t even feel if the water was cold or warm. She just felt surrounded as if she was being held down by an unknown force. The feeling unnerved her. Bracing her arms on each side of the tub, she tried to get up, but she couldn’t. Her legs wouldn’t move; only her upper body was mobile. Trying not to freak out, she tried to wiggle her toes, but there was no movement. Thinking it was just her imagination and that the water was playing tricks on her, she tried again and again, and again.

“Move!” she commanded, growing frustrated with each passing second. But her toes did not obey.

Drip.
Drop.

Fear began to course through her veins. She was immobile and trapped in her tub. Her eyes flickered around the room. Sure enough it looked like her bathroom, but there was something off about it. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it. The bathroom was too dark to be her own. The bulb continued to flicker and sway from side to side. This felt all too much like a scene out of a horror movie; she couldn’t help but feel like a ghost or a spirit will lunge out at her at any second. She eyed what was around her. There was the mirror cabinet, the sink, the toilet, the tub (her in the tub), her toiletries, and the walls—wait! That’s what was different. Where were the walls? Instead, there was nothing but pitch black beyond the model of her bathroom. She could see where the tiles on the floor stopped and after that was nothing. Where was she? What was happening?

Then all of the sudden, a shrill scream echoed from the darkness. “LIZ!” cried out a voice.

Frightened, she searched for the body of the voice, but she saw none. There was nothing but black. “Who’s there?” she hesitatingly asked, unsure of what was out there.

“LIZ!”

Someone was shouting for her, but who was it? The voice was unknown to her. Trying to cover herself up with her arms in fear that someone may walk in on her state of undress, she asked again, “Who’s out there?”

“OH MY GOD, LIZ!”

The voice continued to thunder and all Liz could do was sit and listen. The pausing silence, the sound of her name, the pained out of breath voice—it all began to infuriate her. This voice was calling for her, but who was it that needed her?

“Who’s out there? Come out and show your face!” she yelled. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t get out of the tub and search for the owner of the voice. Here she was stuck, only able to twist her head back. How could she help this person in need when she couldn’t even help herself?

Drip.
Drop.

“Why did you do it?” asked a voice from the dark. This voice was different from the previous one she head.

“Do what?” she replied harshly. What was going on?

“LIZZZZZZZZZZ!”

“Why did you do it, Liz?” it asked a little more forcefully.

Liz shook her head. “DO WHAT?!”

It continued. “Why?”

“LIZ, NO! NO, NO, NO!”

“Why did you do it, Liz Parker?” said the voice, growing louder.

“How do you know my name? Stop this, please! STOP!” she cried as the hot tears flooded down her face. She didn’t know why she was crying. Perhaps it was a reflex from all the fear she was feeling. Whatever the reason, she just wanted her mother in this moment.

Then suddenly someone stepped out from the black, but Liz couldn’t see who it was. There was no face, only the shape of a body as if it was just a shadow. It kept walking towards her.

“OH GOD, LIZ, PLEASE!”

The screaming voice began to repeat one after another, growing in number, and it seemed like they would never stop. They kept coming and coming as if they were trying to attack her. All she hear were screams and her name. Covering her ears, she screamed in pure rage, unable to do anything else. The voices were driving her mad. They stirred such anxiety within her.

“STOP IT, STOP IT!” she cried.

The thing that came from the dark moved closer. It was a phantom—pure black like a shadow, like a distorted image from the television, like something one only saw in movies. It strode towards her, flickering like the light bulb as if it was disappearing and reappearing. It came closer to her and Liz could feel nothing but panic. She struggled against the water, but she only succeeded in splashing the water out of the tub. Her fingers clawed at the porcelain and still she could not move. Her breathing quickened as her eyes grew large. The flickering black knelt down before her.

“Why, Liz Parker?” it asked her.

“NOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Liz shut her eyes in fear and sobbed. “No, no, please stop this!”

“DON’T DO THIS TO ME! DON’T! PLEASE!”

“WHY DID YOU DO IT?” it screamed at her. Just as its long fingers thrust out and gripped her arms, Liz screamed. In mid-scream, the figure disappeared in a billow of smoke as if it was frightened by her scream.

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

It quickly reappeared before her eyes. “REMEMBER!” it yelled. She struggled as best as she could, but nothing happened. Her arms flailed, her head shook from side to side, but her legs did not even flinch. Then in another scream, as it gripped her chin and forced her to look into its eyes, she couldn’t stop the rush of images that began to play out before her eyes. Like a horrible video destined to repeat over and over again, as if her eyes were held open by a wire speculum, the memories came flooding back to her. It was just snippets at first, still images, but then the images slowly became a movie like an optical illusion moving picture book. She recalled the events that happened only moments ago. Or was it only just moments ago? It felt longer than that, like she was reliving a lifetime. She remembered that she had tried to take her own life.

Flashback: There was no longer a point to live. There was no one to live for, no one to love her back, and nothing left to make things right. She was alone and her life had ceased. So she grabbed the razor and made the cut. One slice seemed enough, but the razor had other plans. Four blades equaled four deep cuts. The skin puckered upwards in a curl and exposed her flesh. More, more, more. The blood spilled through the slits as if a faucet had turned on. The crimson life flowed down her arm, staining her, tattooing her. But it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t over yet. She wasn’t finished. Then her other wrist met the same fate.

Falling out of the memory, the figure was gone and Liz found her hand in front of her face in a position that told her that her hand was having a muscle memory of the incident. There was nothing in between her fingers yet she swore she felt the cool blades pressed against her fingertips. Quickly, she touched her wrists and found they were uncut and scarless. There was nothing there—just her dark blue veins beneath her pale skin. She asked herself how this was possible. She was sure she had cut herself… that she had tried to end her own life.

Drip.
Drop.

What had she done? Was it all just a dream? It couldn’t be. If that was the dream, then wasn’t this a dream as well? “What’s going on?” she asked in agony to no one particular. She was physically and emotionally exhausted. The tears had stopped only for a moment, but they threatened to spill once again.

“Why did you do it?” said a voice behind her. It was back.

She turned her head around and saw the shadow again. “Who are you? What do you want from me?” she asked. Was this hell? It was, wasn’t it? Oh god, this is hell, she thought. She had been religious once, but didn’t aliens go against everything in the bible? She faltered in her belief, but now... she was sure she was in hell. This was the price she was paying for killing herself. Was she really doomed to spend an eternity in this place to be tortured so? To be taunted by these voices and replaying her death repeatedly? God, what had she done?

“You know me,” it said.

Her head fell back against the porcelain. “I don’t know you. Please tell me.”

“I can’t. You have to see for yourself.”

“I am looking at you and I don’t know who you are! Maybe if you weren’t completely drenched in black, I could—”

“You do! Look closely. Look deep within. You know who I am!”

Liz tried to think up of a list of names of the people she knew, but no one fit the profile of this darkness. “I don’t know. Please, stop this.”

“Remember what happened. What happened, Liz?”

Drip.
Drop.

Liz bit her quivering lower lip. “I… I tried to k—… I killed myself.”

“What else?”

“What do you mean what else? I killed myself!”

“What happened?”

“I was angry! I was angry and I thought, why the fuck not? Why couldn’t I kill myself? I thought and I knew I had nothing left to live for, so I took the fucking razor and cut myself. I cut myself and bled. I bled and fucking bled till I died. I KILLED MYSELF. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?”

The black flickered and disappeared again. Liz’s face scrunched up in tears. This was pure torture. She knew she had killed herself, but being forced to relive the moment made it all seem too horrible, all too real. She could feel the stinging pain of the razor coming into contact with her wrists yet they remained untouched. She could feel the blades dragging slowly against her tight skin, the warm blood rushing out, and the liquid running down her arm as if it was tracing her veins on the outside. She felt it, but she couldn’t see it.

As the tears came, as she sobbed, she weakly choked out, “What do you want from me?”

Drip.
Drop.

Drip.
Drop.

To be continued.

[kyliemou]

THANK YOU: kay_b, Natalie36, XYZ (x2), roswellian love, forever dreamer, tinie38, KiaraAlexisKlay (x3), ShatteredDreamer, jake17 (x2), KiaraAlexisKlay, roswell3053, garcia88, paper, Natz, and DreamerMaxBehrian. I would also like to thank the lurkers who read this story.

Q&A:

I kinda figured the reason for your delayed post was because of school. But lack of confidence? You? Why? Never in a million years would I peg you to be not confident.

Trust me, I am always so hesitant when I write my chapters because even I don’t know where the story is going. I want to give you guys the best and I don’t want to disappoint you either.

How did you come up with that (If thats what you've come up with!!) I really hope it is, I'm gonna sound like a tool if its not though!! Lol!! This fic well makes you think!!

Rach, I did sort of come up with it. At first, when I wrote it, it was purely unintentional. Then I realized what I did. This story was originally a dream/fantasy bunny fic of mine that would not go away. It practically haunted me to be written. Oh, and do not worry about sounding like a tool. You could tell me that a chapter sucked and I will do my best to improve. I’m open to all kinds of feedback. Hehe.

Nice cliffhanger by the way. *nods* Very nice.

and

Go Carrie, Go Carrie, get her back here, get her back here! *waves pom poms around with Carrie and Kylie written on them) Kylie Kylie she our gal, if she doesn't post, Then we Fanatics will have a cow! Carrie is right....this is deep and awesome and spank your inner moppet for the story that she's holding out, we need Zan! *starts chant* Zan, Zan, Zan, Zan, Zan, Zan, Zan, Zan, Zan! Liz, Liz, Liz, Liz, Liz, Liz,Liz,, Liz, Liz, Liz! Zan and Liz, Zan and Liz, Zan and Liz, Zan and Liz! Zan kicks Max's a--...oh, sorry. Forgot...you're still in la la dreamer land, hehe.

and

Help! I'm suffering from Zan lackage! *grasps chest, wheezes....eyes roll to show the delicate whites and then collapses* Can't... breathe... need... update... *sighing* *Note that Kristin will not be revived until there is an update....please hurry.

*revives quickly* Better late than never! Cliffhangers are what I do best. You are so hilarious! *squishes* Hey, you love Max now! He’s my baby.

What?! How the hell could you possibly lack confidence woman!! You are a brilliant writer! Don't you know that? Now that being said GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE !!!! I am blown away by how you manage to pull me in so deep ..this is truly awesome work..

and

come back to us!! we are all missing this story!! your finals have to be over by now.. we are hanging on to your cliffhanger by our finger nails!! come back and save us!! plus come on let's face it we need more of your Zan ...

Carrie, Finals are over, but I’m being attacked by summer school and laziness. Oh, not to forget, lack of confidence too! Don’t ask why I have it. I think it was built in me since birth. Thanks so much for your kind feedback, but you’re the brilliant writer here. How the heck do you come up with so many story plotlines and work on all of them at the same time? I am only capable of working one at a time, though I do have two other story ideas in the works. They probably won’t be posted till after this fic is done, or a month after.

Help! I'm completely lost! ... Lost, I tell you! Please come back with more, so I can find my way home. (Where's the puppy dog eyes smilie? )

I do believe the board doesn't allow puppy eyes because us, writers, are suckers when it comes to adorable furry animals. This chapter should semi un-confuse you. More un-confusing next chapter.

You can't give us a chapter like 13A and let us wait for so long! Desperate to know what happens to Liz! And I need Zan.

Here’s chapter 13B. Wait for chapter 13C now. Hahahaha!

DreamerMaxBehrian: I answered you back in a message.







Rating: Adult.
Author's Note: I wish I had a good excuse for why this chapter is late, but I don't. It's sheer laziness and school's fault. But alas, here it is. I could not help, but split the rest of this chapter into another two parts. Yes, I am truly evil that way. Hopefully the next part won't take as long. I do hope this chapter meets your expectations. I was having a really hard time writing this one out for some unknown reason.

There are lines taken from “Pilot” (Season 1, Episode 1) and “285 South” (Season 1, Episode 5).





Chapter Thirteen – Part B:

And I'm good, good, good to go.
And I'm good, good, good to go.
I got to get away,
Get away from all of my mistakes.

So here I sit looking at the traffic lights.
The red extinguishes the hope that the green ignites.
I want to run away. I want to ditch my life
‘cause all of my mistakes keep me awake at night.

And after all of my alibis desert me,
I just want to get by.
I don’t want nothing to hurt me.
I had no idea where my head was at,
but if my heart says I’m sorry, can we leave it at that?
Because I just want for all of this to end.

And I so hate consequences
and running from you is what my best defense is.
Consequences,
oh God, don’t make me face up to this.
And I so hate consequences
and running from you is what my best defense is
‘cause I know that I let you down
and I don’t want to deal with that.

It just now hit me this is more than just a set back
and when you spelled it out, well, I guess I didn’t get that.
And every trace of momentum is gone
and this isn’t turning out the way I want.

And after all of my alibis desert me,
I just want to get by.
I don’t want nothing to hurt me.
I had no idea where my head was at,
but if my heart says I’m sorry, can we leave it at that?
Because I just want for all of this to end.

And I spent all last night
tearing down every stoplight
and stop sign in this town.
Now I think there might
be no way to stop me now.
I'll get away despite
the fact I’m so weighed down.

All of my escapes have been exhausted.
I thought I had a way, but then I lost it.
And my resistance was once much stronger,
and I know I can't go on like this much longer.

When I got tired of running from you,
I stopped right there to catch my breath.
There your words, they caught my ears.
You said, “I miss you son. Come home.”
And my sins, they watched me leave,
and in my heart, I so believed
the love you felt for me was mine,
the love I’d wished for all this time.
And when the doors were closed,
I heard no I told you so’s.
I said the words I knew you knew:
Oh God, Oh God, I needed you.
God, all this time, I needed you, I needed you.

And I so hate consequences
and running from you is what my best defense is.
I hate these consequences
because I know that I let you down.
Now I don't wanna deal with that.
“I So Hate Consequences,” Relient K.

December 15, 2000, Friday; Roswell, New Mexico:

Liz wiped away the tears that trailed down her face. She tried to control her heaves, but was only successful for a few seconds before the small cry fell from her quivering lips once again. All she heard were her own gasping sobs. Everything else was silent. There were no more screams. The droplets continued to ripple the water underneath the faucet yet she heard no sound of them making contact with the surface of the water. Biting down on her lower lip, still shaking, she tried to control her emotions. She knew the ordeal was far from over. There was no way that after that intense torture would it just end suddenly. There had to be more and she was right.

“Why is it you can’t remember?” it asked as it reappeared in front of her.

Now, slightly numb both emotionally and physically, she responded monotonously, “I have no idea what you want from me.” Did they not do this already? She didn’t know what it was asking her for. No matter how many times it would ask, she didn’t know.

“I need you to remember.”

Frustration, that was what she felt. “Remember what? What the hell do you need to me to remember exactly? I already told you I killed myself.”

It crouched down to its knees and seemed as though to stare at her, even though Liz could not see its eyes. “Why?” it asked.

“I told you why! I was angry, I was—”

“You’ve been searching for the answer to something, something you desperately need to find out.”

“Can you stop being so cryptic for one second?”

“Trust me, if I could, I would, but you see, you control this,” it said, emphasizing their situation with a wave of its hand.

“I control this?” Liz asked, baffled.

“This isn’t my mind. It’s yours. It’s you who’s trapping me here, you who’s seeing me like this,” it said, referring to its dark state.

Liz shook her head. “I don’t understand. I don’t—”

“Your mind has created this, this realm. I’m stuck here, you’re stuck here—that is until you, yourself, decide to let us free.”

Liz narrowed her eyes at the figure, wondering if it was playing tricks on her. She thought about being “free” as this thing said. Hell, if she could stand up and get out of the tub, she would even click her heels together just to see if her realm had the same going-home methods like the Wizard of Oz. She closed her eyes and pictured her home—the image of her home, her parents standing in front of it, Maria and Alex waiting for her—but nothing happened. She even pictured Max, no matter how much it pained her, but again, no response. If Max didn’t work—Max, the very core reason of why she was living—if he wasn’t able to bring her back, then what would? There was nothing else. She let out an exasperated sigh, growing angrier by the second.

“You’re not trying hard enough,” it said.

“Look here, if I could leave, I would! But I’m sure you’ve got it wrong because trust me, there is no one other than me who wants to leave this place more. At least you’re up and walking. Hell, you’re zipping all over the place like Flash on crack! I’m trapped in this stupid freaking tub, completely naked and soaked against my own will.”

“Now whose fault was it to commit suicide in a tub?”

“Fuck you!” yelled Liz, narrowing her eyes. It was her fault, but who knew the place you killed yourself would be the place you would be stuck in forever? If she knew, she would’ve done it somewhere like on a swing or on her bed, so she could swing or sleep forever. At least those choices were better than soaking in a tub. Hell, what she would give to be clothed. She felt uncomfortable being naked in front of this black figure. She was barely unable to cover herself; only the top portion of her body.

“Look, just listen to me: something triggered this episode of yours. Something caused for you to do this to yourself. What was it?”

Liz did this to herself. It was because she wasn’t strong enough, because she wasn’t brave enough to live in a world where she would be alone and Max-less, because she couldn’t handle seeing the disappointed faces of her friends, but in the back of her mind, Future-Max’s name clearly rang out. But why? It wasn’t his fault. It couldn’t be. There was no possible way. “But what does that have to do with anything?” she asked.

“It has to do with everything,” it stated.

Future-Max Evans: a leather-clad, luscious brunette-haired man of 6” feet tall, a build unlike any male athlete, deep chestnut eyes that stared right into one’s soul, lips that begged to be chewed on, the brown mole above his upper lip that asked to be tasted, the soft hairs sprinkled over his arms and legs, his well-endowed manhood curled in between his legs with just the right amount of hair. No, he was much more than just a person of physical beauty, more than a perfect half-alien, half-human specie. He was the one that came back to the past to prevent his future from occurring within another time plane, the one who put down his own life for the lives of others, the one that captured Liz’s heart and went away with it. But what did he have to do with anything, especially with this so-called realm? He was gone. He changed the future—his part was done... Wasn’t it?

“Please remember, Liz. Everything balances on you remembering the answer of what you so desperately seek.”

“But I don’t know! I don’t remember anything. You keep asking me, over and over again, as if it would help, but it doesn’t! Minutes from now, even hours, days, weeks—no matter how long I’m stuck here, I still won’t remember! What is it that you want from me? Maybe if you just told me, we could leave this place already!”

“I can’t do that,” it replied.

Future-Max. This thing said he had to do with everything. Future-Max. Future-Max. What was his role in this? What exactly did he—

Suddenly, a glass room appeared before her and standing in the middle of the room was him, looking better than when she had last seen him (before they made love). His scars were gone, so were the black bags under his eyes. His hair looked darker as if it had been nourished with vitamins. His skin had a healthy glow. He looked amazing, especially since she hadn’t seen him in so long. He looked almost happy, but how could he when he no longer existed? How could someone be so calm and content when he is dead? Perhaps he was in heaven, perhaps that’s why. Was she seeing Future-Max in heaven? But what was this glass room?

The black figure looked at the room and turned back to Liz. “Please remember.”

Liz wanted to go to him. She wanted to run to him, hold him in her arms, and cry into his warm chest. She wanted to tell him how much she missed him, how much she wanted him back, how much she… She wanted to go to him. With her eyes focused on Max, she quickly noticed how close the glass wall was to her face. Before she knew it, she was standing in front of the room. She was standing and clothed! There was no water, not one trace of wetness clung to her. She was up on her feet! Instead of dancing in joy for finally feeling the ground under her feet, she pressed her hand against the glass as if trying to reach out for Future-Max. She stood so close to the glass that her breath made a fog. The smoky look made Future-Max look like a mirage, and Liz was damn sure he was one. But he wasn’t; he was really there in the flesh, just beyond the thin glass wall. Future-Max strode towards her and placed his hand over where her own was. Despite the glass barrier, she swore she could feel his touch, his heat emitting and mixing with her own.

“Max,” she whimpered as her lower lip began to quiver. Her heart lurched at the sight of him. “I miss—“

“I’m sorry, Liz,” he said, interrupting her.

Her forehead crunched upwards in confusion. “Sorry? Why are you sorry?”

“It’s my fault.”

“What is?”

“Remember, Liz,” he said. “You have my memories. Find it, remember it.”

“Max, I don’t know what you’re talking about. You and that thing,” she said, glancing at the blackened figure and then focusing back to Future-Max, “keep trying to get me to remember something and I—“

“It’s my fault you’re here. I’m the reason for this.”

“NO! It’s not your fault. I wasn’t—“

“I’m not talking about that, Liz. You,” he said, stopping mid-sentence. His hand lifted away and his fingers trailed along the glass as if he was stroking her face. He frowned with a clench of his teeth. “You did what I did.”

Liz remained silent before it hit her, before his words really hit her. As her eyes widened, she hesitatingly spoke, “Max, you… you tried to… you tried to kill yourself?”

He nodded, giving her a frown that told her that he was upset with how things turned out yet the frown seemed to tell her that he missed her too. Tears began to fill up her eyes once again. She didn’t know how to respond to this new found information. Questions rushed through her mind: Future-Max had tried to kill himself? But why? When? Where? How?

“Why, Max? Why?” she asked him. He looked so distressed and she had never wanted to hold him more. She wanted him in her arms, comforting him. She wanted to feel him pressed up against her. His lips against hers. She wanted him.

Realizing that perhaps she did have the power to get them out, she concentrated on getting to Future-Max. She imagined the glass barrier disappearing and her body slipping through. But nothing happened. At least she tried. Thinking back on Future-Max’s suicide, in the middle of her confused thoughts, the glass barrier disappeared. If she really did control this realm, she was doing a pretty bad job. Whenever she wanted something, nothing happened. But when she didn’t think about it, it would happen. Liz’s hand, which was still pressed against the glass, quickly made contact with his body as she stumbled forward. She didn’t jump for joy that she made the barrier disappear. Instead, all she could feel were her fingers pressed up against his muscular chest, his warm and beating chest. This was the first touch in a month, possibly the last touch once again. Her fingers fell from his body, found his hand, and entwined their fingers together. Both staring at their joined hands, Future-Max quickly pulled her to him. Their bodies collided together like true lovers who had not seen each other in decades. But like many physical touches with Max, she found herself thrown into memories not of her own.

Flash: He remembered all too clearly when he, a little boy, emerged from his birth place. Trapped inside a cocoon, his eyes opened. They stung when the thick liquid began to press against his eyeballs. Confused as to where he was, he opened his mouth to find out he couldn’t breathe. There was no air, but only gel. It began to fill his burning lungs and he began to panic. He struggled, but it felt like something was weighing him down. Still floating, his hand slowly reached out forward, gliding along through the liquid, to what seemed to be a barrier to the other side and as his fingers tore through the layer, his fingertips felt the cool air. Automatically, he knew that was what his lungs needed. Gathering all the strength he had in his little body, he pushed through the thick blue gel, forcing his way out. Like a new born child, his tiny body slid out, falling to the floor, and slid a few inches as the gel covered every single part of his body and prevented him to have a steady balance. Coughing, he spit out the mouthfuls of gel he had taken in before finally taking in his first breathe of air. The air was too cold at first, almost painful like needle pricks in his lungs, but at the same time, he was on a high. His brain tried to calm him down from the intake, never having experience oxygen before.

Wiping the goo away from his face, he turned back to see what he had hatched from. Beside his birth place, there were four other pods, but only two were still filled. One had already been torn through and nothing remained inside. Instantly though, he recognized the other two. A girl with short straight blonde hair that looked so much like him—he knew she was his sister. The other, a boy with spiky hair—was he his brother? He had to be. So he sat, in front of the other two pods, naked and shivering in the cold, waiting for them to hatch, waiting for them to come join him.

The day he was found on the side of the road, he remembered feeling scared. Just who was coming to get them? Would these people harm him? Would they separate him from his family? He held onto his sister’s hand, but his brother took off running. He didn’t want to stay with them. He was more terrified than he was. But with no speech, he could not call his brother back. He just watched his brother run away into the night, his eyes glowing with fear, as a blanket wrapped him and his sister up and they were led to a vehicle. He remembered as he sat in the car, he saw the glistening eyes of the blonde woman who found him. She was staring at him as if he was the most precious thing she had ever seen.

Days passed by. They were currently occupying the home of the people who found them. They never seemed to leave the house at first, always watching them, trying to coax them to talk. But what they didn’t know was they couldn’t speak. They didn’t know how to. Then they took them to a place that was white everywhere. People rushed past them as if there was a war going on. Children sat beside them; some were reading and the others were playing. They sat in a room on some type of bed as a man dressed in white stood before them. He tried to separate him from his sister, but he held on. His tiny fingers gripped his sister’s, not caring if he was hurting her. He wouldn’t let go because he knew he had to protect her. He couldn’t understand why but he felt that there was some danger out there, waiting for the right time to take her away from him.

He didn’t understand a word these people said to him, but he felt as if he was being belittled when they spoke to him in such a childish way. They smiled, offered treats, and spoke slowly as if he would understand if they spoke like they were mentally impaired. He began to read books he found lying in the children’s room outside, studying the strange symbols. His brain seemed to be able to process this language, seemed to understand it, so he tried to read as many books as he could in that short time.

Back in what was supposedly their room, with two beds in a room, the couple came in. When their eyes settled upon his sister, the blonde woman extended her arms out. His sister was willing to go, but he wasn’t ready to let her go. He held her back, his tiny hand clutched hers. He gave her a look of command that told her to stay back. She frowned, nodded, and sat back down on the bed. The blonde woman looked over at the taller man next to her. They left the room, disappeared behind closed doors, and he could hear them speaking. Perhaps they wanted only his sister and not him. Perhaps they decided to give them up. Perhaps they would decide to leave. But moments later, they came back and the blonde woman, this time, extended her arms out to both of them.

His sister looked over at him with hope. Her eyes told him that they wouldn’t be separated. They would, forever, be together. It would be safe as long as they were with each other. So he let go of her hand. She took the first step and found herself burying her face into the sweet smelling blonde curls. He watched this interaction. It seemed harmless enough. The woman extended her arm out to him. Hesitant, he took the first step. She took his hand and pulled him to her, and they both were in her arms. In that moment, they felt something they never felt before—safety and love.

If anyone had ever asked him what the best thing that happened to him was, most would think being adopted would be the greatest moment of his life. Don’t get him wrong, it was. If he had a choice between living in a loving home and living in the wild, he would choose the loving home. If some knew his secret, some would think it was being reunited with his brother, but that wasn’t it either. The greatest moment of his life was stepping off the school bus and seeing a little brown-haired girl playing from afar. He remembered his tiny heart beating against his chest like never before. His breath caught in his throat as he watched, mesmerized. Thoughts of where his sister had went never even came to him. He couldn’t help, but smile for the first time when he saw her toothless grin. Despite missing her two front teeth, she was beautiful. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. She glowed with such innocence, such happiness, and from that moment, he knew. At age six, he had fallen in love with a girl, he then knew, he would never have.

But then the amazing and the worst thing happened: she was shot and he had to save her life. He couldn’t just let her die. In that split second of seeing her on the ground, motionless, he knew what his life would be like if he let her slip away before his eyes. He would never forgive himself. Even if he had to leave Roswell, even if he had to endanger his family, he would be content knowing that she was alive. Without any other thought, he went to her, placed his magical hand over her bleeding wound, and closed it, leaving her skin flawless once again. It wasn’t until he was being driven away from the café did he realize he had touched her. It wasn’t an accidental graze or a bump. He had touched her in the way he never thought possible. It wasn’t sexual or passion-filled, but to him, it meant everything. Her warmth had left an imprint on his hand. It would comfort him many nights, knowing that because of him, she was alive.

Ever since then, his life had changed for both the better and the worst. But how many times had he wished in his lifetime that he wasn’t an alien, that he wasn’t different, that he was just a human? More than he could count. Everything would have been easier if he wasn’t a monster, but then he would have never saved Liz Parker’s life. If he had to choose though, between being an alien and saving Liz’s life and being human and watching her die, he would gladly be from outer space. But deep inside, he was conflicted.

Later on, when his life seemed to be getting better and better (he made friends who knew and accepted his secret, he dated, married, and loved Liz Parker), death decided to haunt him. It surrounded him. It was everywhere he went, everything he touched. He was the bringer of death. Ironic, wasn’t it? With a simple touch, he could heal. He could bring back those on the brink of death yet he couldn’t save those he loved. What good was he then?

But how did things go so wrong in such a short amount of time? Did he really not see it happening before his eyes or was he ignoring the horrible truth? He remembered the day all too well. Her cold green eyes were completely black—emotionless. Her face was stern; he could almost see his death being played out in her eyes. With her lover, she stared down at him as if he had no meaning in her life. He denied it, he didn’t want to believe it, but in that moment, he was forced to accept something he had been dreading.

“Isabel, please. Why are you doing this?” he asked.

“It’s Vilandra,” she replied. Hearing that name, the name that represented the horrible past, he knew he had lost her forever again. There was no turning back. His ex-sister and her lover brought destruction to his world, to everything and everyone he loved. He remembered far too well of hearing the sounds of bodies dropping to the floor. Cries, screams, and begs haunted him in his sleep. He had to kill in order to save others. His hands would thrust forward, light emitted from the palms, and then person in front of them would cease.

Everyone he loved, they all died, killed by his own family member. All seemed so bleak. He loved his wife, he did. But how could he protect her when he couldn’t save the others? Maria and Alex—they all died for no reason. They were innocent. Michael jumped in the way to try to save them, but he was too late, getting caught in the fire himself. Liz was just as much in pain as he was. Life, this wasn’t life. This was hell and it all began with him. So in a fragile state, in desperation, in a moment of constant pleading, he tried to end it all. It was only till his wife found him in his own bloody mess, after she cried and screamed, after she miraculously healed him, after she held him did he realize this wasn’t the way to go. He had to do something else, something other if not less drastic, to save everything he loved, something to prevent it all from happening all over again. That was when he left his world to journey to another—his past.

When he left his home, his world, he knew he was killing himself all over again, but this time, it would be a sacrifice. He was leaving his wife, the one thing that gave his meaning. Before he was swooped up by the Granilith, he made love to her over and over again. He tried to memorize her heavy breasts pressed against his chest. He tried to remember the taste of her sweat on his tongue, her scent invading his nose. He wanted to burn the images of her into his brain: her flushed cheeks, her open panting lips, her breasts gently shaking as he took her, claimed her, invaded her. Declarations of love were said but it wasn’t enough. He wanted to show her, he wanted to leave an imprint on her body of his love. He grasped her, bit down on her, drew blood, and tugged her hair back as he pushed his hard cock into her wet body. He wasn’t the only one being a masochist. She, just as forceful, clawed at him, clamped her teeth down on his bloody lips, leaving trails of lines down his arms and back. They fucked each other out of desperation. They wanted to scar each other so they would be reminded of their love.

Thrown back to the past, seeing his young self reminded him of happier days before the dark days. He knew he shouldn’t, that he couldn’t, but he slept with his wife’s younger self. She was there, willing, pleading. He could not deny her. Her body, untouched in this time line, called for his experienced one to teach her. He took her gently at first, but overwhelmed with the familiar body that he loved, he could not control himself. He thrust, he bucked, he buried his organ inside her tight pussy. Her loving warmth covered him, mingling with his own juices. He heard only her cries of pleasure as his hip almost violently pressed against hers. Pushing her hair back, he stared at the beauty before him. He wasn’t an old man anymore. He was a young teenager, ready to do anything his love asked him. “I love you,” she whispered into his ear. Hearing those words, he realized just how much he missed his wife, how much he loved this time line’s Liz. She clung to him, accepting what he was willing to give her. Her walls held him, suctioned him back inside of her. This was their love.

Exhausted, they fell asleep but he woke up later. He knew he didn’t have much time left. He would leave this wonderful world once again, this time permanently. Wrapping his arms around her, he pressed against her soft body. She was so warm and he was so cold. Love, love—that’s what he was feeling. “I love you so much, I hope you know that. I did this all for you. It’s all for you. Be happy, love life, do everything you wanted to do. Even if you have to leave me, just please… just stay alive. I love you, I love you, I love you, Liz Evans,” he whispered into her hair. As his eyes closed, breathing in her scent, he would never open them again.

When Liz broke out of the flashes, she found herself back in the tub, naked, unable to get up, soaking wet once again, but she didn’t care. The memories, the emotions—they all hit her like a truck running her over. She felt pain, loneliness, but mostly importantly, she felt love, love from Future-Max. Her face scrunched up, bursting into tears. She looked around, but all she saw was the black figure. Max was no longer there. Where did Max go, she questioned. She couldn’t tell him her side, show him how she saw him in her eyes. Seeing the blackened figure in front of her, she opened her mouth to ask what it did with Max, but it interrupted her.

“Do you remember now?” it asked.

All she could do was nod.

To be continued.

[kyliemou]

If there was a button to say THANK YOU to each and individual feedbacker, I would click it all day long repeatedly. So props to: jake17, KiaraAlexisKlay, forever dreamer, XYZ, Natz, kay_b, Egyptian_Kiss, Natalie36, roswell3053, paper, DreamerMaxBehrian, and all lurkers.

Q&A:

why is Liz back in the bathtub? And what does she understand? ... I guess that’s why your story is magnificiant and complex and mine is full of Zan being insecure and jealous ..oh and lots of sex.. Summer school is going to have to wait

The first paragraph of this chapter should explain the what-she-understands part. As to why she is back in the tub, Egyptian_Kiss (four feedbacks down) actually best explained it better than I would. Oh, P.S. your’s Zan Sex > My mumbo jumbo words. Summer school lasts for 5 weeks total and I have already completed two, so three more weeks and I’m all yours! But I doubt I’ll post every day. Heh.

Finally, we get FutureMax's point of view! And what a view! Amazing....simply amazing. I think I know why Liz is trapped in her mind....she tried to kill herself but Max didn't want her to, so maybe there's a trigger he inadvertantly placed on her? And Isabel had killed them all? Future Max did say that Isabel had died.... … Though your FutureMax is a delicious character in himself. Not a lot of people can get FutureMax so clearly. He's so deep and real in this, I like it.

Thanks, K! I quite like Future-Max—he was so much fun to write, but last chapter/this chapter will possibly be the last we see of him. Sad, I know! Who knows, maybe I’ll find another use for him. The Isabel thing will be cleared up, but later in the story. Let’s just leave that idea hanging in the air for a while.

Poor Max, you’re making me want a dreamer reunion now

Hey, what’s so bad about a dreamer reunion?

Well now that you have us all a tweeter with your riddle of what she knows and why she's back in the bathtub you have to come back soon. I think I've reasoned out why she ended up back in the tub. I think that it stands to reason that if she was trapped in her mind in the first place that it wouldn't be much of a stretch to say that she can jump from memory to memory, or fantasy to fantasy- sort of like a dream. And the sole purpose of a dream is to let us work out things for ourselves, that's why there is usually meaning behind every nuance of that dream, every detail. I think that maybe her remembering what happened between her and Future Max and his reasoning for why she had to push away from Max was what she needed to remember, she needed to understand. I think that enlightenment was the whole purpose, not so much remembrance, but understanding what she was coming to remember. It was great seeing things from Future Max's point of view. Update soon. EK!

I LOVE YOU! Why? You hit bulls eye on why Liz is back in the tub. If you don’t mind, I’m going to use your explanation, so forgive me if I use it word for word (I’ll use quotation marks). Credit shall be given to you. XD

Great update. I can't wait to find out exactly what she was suppossed to remember. Was it what Future Max said to her before he faded away, or was it something else?? I think that when FMax said that it was his fault she was trapped there, that it was suppossed to be a clue, but that's about all I got. I could just be grasping at straws. I don't know. Hurry back soon.

You pretty much have the explanation down. I explained it in the first paragraph of this chapter.










Author’s Note: I know, I know—most of you are confused as to why Liz is back in the tub and what she is supposed to remember. First, Liz is back in the tub because, as Egyptian_Kiss guessed so absolutely correctly, she is back in the tub because remember, she is trapped in her mind in the first place. Everything is very memory and fantasy-like, like a dream. Egyptian_Kiss said: “The sole purpose of a dream is to let us work out things for ourselves, that’s why there is usually meaning behind every nuance of that dream, every detail.” Clap for her, people! She is correct. Her “enlightenment was the whole purpose, not so much remembrance, but understanding what she was coming to remember.” As for the second question, it is explained in this chapter.

Also, may I ask if any of you hate the Max in my story? I know 100% of you LOVED Future-Max and Zan, but any of you are oppose to present Max? Because I couldn’t help but wonder as I write each chapter that Max is technically Future-Max, so if you love Future-Max, that means you love Max too. You guys are actually scaring away my Max-Lovers. No, seriously. You guys are scaring away my Max-Lovers. XD

There are lines taken from “Max In The City” (Season 2, Episode 9).







Chapter Thirteen – Part C:

Standing on a building,
I am a lightning rod
and all these clouds are so familiar.
Descending from the mountain tops,
the gods are threatening,
but I will return an honest soldier.

Home...

Steady on this high-rise,
like every lightning rod,
and all these clouds are boiling over.
Swimming in adrenaline,
the sky is caving in,
but I will remain the honest soldier

Home...
“Lightening Rod,” Guster.

December 15, 2000, Friday; Roswell, New Mexico:

She finally understood what Future-Max and the black figure was trying to tell her, what they were trying to get her to remember: Future-Max had killed himself. It was his memories, his thoughts, and his pain that had merged with her own. She had to remember his past with her present. It wasn’t because she had his memories that she did this to herself. He did not influence, but he fueled her tangled emotions even more. They shared many similar thoughts, fears, and goals. She was practically half Future-Max in this lifetime.

He did something drastic—he tried to end his life.
She did something drastic—she tried to end her life.

The black reappeared in front of her. Liz quickly twisted back around—the water slightly sloshing out—and this time, she found herself facing… No, it couldn’t be, she thought in shock. The figure was no longer black. Liz took in the physical traits, the outfit, everything. She was facing herself. It was herself! Oh my god, she thought. But at the same time, it wasn’t her. This other person that resembled her was older with short bobbed hair that came under her chin. She was clothed in black from top to bottom, consisting of a tank top, a leather jacket, and leather pants. She looked so unlike Liz yet she wore her face, just slightly older. But Liz knew that she would never wear something as skin-tight as this person wore. She never even thought about cutting her hair so short! Would she?

Her words were caught in the middle of her throat and it wasn’t till a moment of silence passed before she finally spoke. “Who are you?” asked a hesitant and frightened Liz. She wondered if this was shape-shifter, another Nasedo, but then questioned why a shape-shifter would be haunting her in hell. But was this really hell now? With her new knowledge, she was still unsure of where she was. This ex-black figure might have told her this was her realm, but that wasn’t specific enough.

“I am you,” replied the older doppelganger. Just as Liz was about to ask another question, Future-Liz cut her off. “Let’s get you out of that bloody mess first.”

“What bloody—” As Liz looked down, she saw the water she was drenched in. It was red like blood, not clear like before. “Oh my god…” She began to try to get out, afraid of the blood, but could not move. Seeing this was a smack in her face. This was her blood that she was drenched in, bathing in, resting in. But why was she back in the tub? Why was she naked once again? Was she not out only moments ago, standing face-to-face with Future-Max? How did she get back in here?

Future-Liz knew what she was thinking. After all, they were the same person. “Like I said before, it’s your realm here. It’s your world. You’re trapped in your mind, subconsciously controlling everything, including seeing me as, well, some sort of shadow figure. I couldn’t tell you what to remember because it wasn’t up to me. It was up to you to find out for yourself, up to you to figure things out. You knew, but you didn’t know at the same time. Isn’t the mind a fickle thing?”

Understanding and partly overwhelmed by everything, Liz allowed her older twin to pull her out of the tub, struggling slightly due to her numb lower body. Once she was leaning against the outer shell of the tub, Future-Liz said, “Let’s get you some clothes,” and instantly, she was clothed. “So why did you do it?” the twin asked.

Liz ignored the question, still somewhat amazed and confused, and instead asked, “What do you mean you’re me?”

“I am you.”

“That’s not possible,” said Liz, shaking her head as to confirm her doubt.

The woman smiled and knelt down in front of her. “Why can you believe in Future-Max, but not a future you?”

Liz gasped as realization sunk in. “You’re… you’re me?” she asked. “Like me-me?”

“I’m you from the future.”

“But how? Future-Max told me that we would—”

“Explode if we came into contact with our own selves? We should, but I don’t know why we’re not,” replied Future-Liz who had wondered the same thing when she saw her younger self in the tub. At first, she was hesitant, not wanting to encounter herself in fear that she would cause the present-Liz to cease, but she knew something was different—that this wasn’t the world they had previously both been in. They were somewhere else. It was only moments later when she was completely blackened did she understand that she was trapped in her younger self’s mind.

“Why—why are you here?” asked Liz, snapping her older self out of her thoughts.

Future-Liz shook her head in confusion. “I don’t know. I disappeared earlier than planned and found myself here.”

“Disappeared? You mean, from your time?”

A wave of sadness rushed over her doppelganger’s face and she replied, “From your time.”

Liz gasped once again. “You were in my time?” she said, shocked, only to receive her answer when she saw her twin nod her head. “Where are we? I mean, I know I’m in my mind, but why?”

“I don’t know, but we’re here for a reason,” said Future-Liz. Then she raised her hand and rested it against her younger self’s cheek. “Why did you do it, Liz?” Future-Liz, not understanding why she was here or talking to present-Liz, had found herself here in the dark when her eyes opened. Then suddenly as if someone had turned on the light, she found herself staring at Liz Parker, age eighteen, resting in a tub that looked similar to her own in the past. Future-Liz knew this wasn’t the same time period as she had disappeared from the dupes. She didn’t know why she knew this, but inside, she just knew. She was back in the past by only a few days—before she started heading out to Roswell. When she took a step forward, like the flashes she had with Max, but this time with no physical contact, she was overwhelmed with flashes of her younger self mutilating her wrists. They were memories of present-Liz and she knew what Liz had done. She, her younger self, Liz Parker, had tried to end her life.

Present-Liz closed her eyes at the contact of her own, well, older hand. As her lower lip quivered, she opened her eyes to find herself staring back into, technically, her own eyes. “I… I couldn’t handle it anymore. I wasn’t strong enough.”

Future-Liz then embraced her. “Oh, but you are! You’re strong. You’re just doubting yourself.”

“I’m not! I was and am in such pain. I’m the cause for the end of your world! I’m the reason our friends died! I caused so much pain to Max and everyone else! I’m in love with a man I can’t be with,” said Liz. She didn’t want to say this next part, but what did she have to lose? “I fell in love with a man that no longer even exists.”

Future-Liz frowned at first at the mention of Liz saying she was the reason their friends had died. There was some truth to that, but she wasn’t going to tell Liz any more. Instead, she chucked and pulled away. “What is it with us Liz Parkers and Max Evans?”

“I have no clue, but they have—”

“Some kind of hold on us?” Future-Liz finished for her.

“Exactly!”

“Liz,” whispered Future-Liz as she cupped her face once again. “Us, Parkers, we’re strong, stronger than we seem. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t have listened to Future-Max and done whatever he asked you to. You wouldn’t have risked everything just to save your world, save my world.”

“But—”

Future-Liz shook her head and took her younger self’s chin in her hand, forcing her to look her clearly in the face. “No buts. We are strong and you must believe that.”

Liz could only shake her head. She wanted to let her future-self know how much Future-Max meant to her, how much she loved him, how much she wanted him to stay. But most of all, she felt guilty for being with him. She felt guilty because in a way, she was the other woman Future-Max had cheated with.

Future-Liz smiled, instantly knowing what Liz was thinking. It was weird; it was as if they were mentally connected with one another. “I know. Don’t worry about it.”

Her eyes widened in shock. “You know? That I—… I slept with Max?”

“I forgive you. I think if it were me in your position, I’d do the same,” she said with a laugh.

“But I’m sorry though.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

Just like that, they had reached an understanding, knowing that Max Evans, no matter what he did, would affect their lives greatly. They were in love with the man—what more could they say? As cliché as it was, if he had asked them to jump, they would ask how high. They knew in their hearts that Max felt the same. He risked his life to save theirs, more than once.

“Liz, I don’t know how long I have, but…”

“No, don’t go!”

“I have to. This isn’t my world and it’s not your time,” said Future-Liz, leaving the words “to die” hanging in the air. “I need you to listen to me and listen to me carefully. In my world, devastating things happened. Yes, we were the reason for it, but my Max came back to the past to try to fix it. When he left, while I was left alone, I had a vision.”

Liz held her hand up to stop her. “Wait, you had a vision?”

“Max, when he healed you, when he brought you back from the dead, he changed you.”

“What do you mean by changed?” Liz asked in confusion.

“I don’t know how to explain it. Your human cells started to evolve, becoming like the aliens’. You develop powers similar to theirs’.”

“I—I have powers?”

“I can’t tell you what they are or when you’ll get them, but they will do so much good in this world. Just remember that,” Future-Liz said, smiling, knowing what she said was truth. Getting back to her story, she said, “When I had my vision, I saw things that happened in this timeline when Max came here to change the events.”

“What happened?”

She went silent. Future-Liz didn’t want to give it all away, not knowing what would happen when they left this place, not knowing how much would be affected if present-Liz knew too much. But present-Liz was smart, she knew that much. “People still died, didn’t they?” asked Liz. Future-Liz could only look at her, but her eyes gave away the answer.

“That’s why I’m here, Liz. That’s why I came here to change what Max changed.”

“When did you come here? How? Who did you go to?” Liz had so many questions to ask her doppelganger, but she knew neither of them had enough time to fully explain.

Future-Liz ran her fingers through her short hair. “I came here a week later after Max, using the Granilith. Max explained to you how it worked?” Present-Liz nodded. “I didn’t know where I was going or what time I would be sent to, but the Granilith sent me to New York.”

“New York?” said Liz as her eyebrows rose. “What’s in New York?”

As the older Liz stared at her younger self, she sucked in her breath and replied, “Zan.”

“Zan,” said a confused Liz as if it was the most matter of fact thing in the world with a hint of curiosity.

“When Antar sent the pods here to Earth, they also sent backup pods. One set was sent to Roswell, New Mexico while the other was sent to New York.”

“You mean, Max, Isabel, Michael, and Tess have—”

Finishing her sentence, Future-Liz said, “Twins. Zan is Max, Lonnie’s Isabel, Rath’s Michael, and Ava’s Tess. Physically, they look alike and they have similar traits, but because their living environment was different from our friends’, they grew up alone, but in the process became stronger than our group. They are wilder and major risk-takers, but deep down, they are just like our own.”

“So you were sent to them?”

“Yes. They are heading up here as we speak. You will meet them.”

“I will?”

“Yes. Do not be frightened by them. They are here to help you change events. They’re here to help.” Once again, Future-Liz felt her stomach go cold, cold like when she was in the van with the dupes. This was not a good feeling, she knew this already. The feeling transported her back to her last moments with Zan—how she clung to him, wishing to stay just a little bit longer. She knew she didn’t have much time once again. She would disappear before she would be able to fix anything. She would leave before she could finish. She would be gone earlier than planned, just like when she had tried to kiss Zan one last time. God, how she wanted to feel his lips on hers on last time…

Focusing on Liz, she spoke, “Liz, listen carefully. They’re your friends. Don’t fear them, especially not Zan. Things happened when I was in New York. With us…” Her younger self gave her a curious look. Then as she took a breath and bluntly said, “I slept with Zan.”

“You what?!” cried out Liz. God, it wasn’t just Max Evans himself that the Liz Parkers were drawn to. It was his twin too! It dawned on her that apparently anything that looked like Max and was an alien were enough to drive them mad with lust, passion, and love. “But—but why? How? WHY?”

As Future-Liz laughed at her younger self’s outburst, the unsettling feeling in her stomach was growing faster by the second. It was time. She didn’t have time to explain how she and Zan came to be nor why she slept with him. She wanted to tell her so badly, but knowing that Zan was on his way, she figured present-Liz would find out for herself. Why ruin the potential fun Zan would bring with him? So she ignored Liz’s question. “Liz, it’s time for you to wake up,.”

“What—what are you talking about?”

“It’s time for you to wake up, go back.”

“I can’t,” breathed out Liz. “I killed myself.” How could she wake up? How could she go back? She felt her eyes start to grow heavy and she didn’t know why nor could she stop it.

“Don’t do this, Liz.” Future-Liz knew time wasn’t on their side. She felt their presence weakening by the second; their link slowly disappearing. Time, I hate you. Why can’t you ever give me more time? I just need a little more… I needed more time with Max, with Zan, and with Liz. Why can’t you just grant me this, she questioned in her mind..

Knowing what her doppelganger was referring to, Liz replied, “I’m done here. There’s nothing left for me. I’m finished.” As she spoke those words, Liz knew they were true. How could she possibly go back and act like nothing had happened? The reason she was in this place was because she killed herself. How could she come back to life?

“Oh, there is so much here for you, Liz. You are destined for great things.” As the words slipped from her mouth, Future-Liz finally understood why they were here, why she was here facing her younger self. When she was living, she knew what she had done, but frightened by death, she couldn’t stop it. She allowed it to disappear with her, within her. While present-Liz hated destiny, hated fate, Future-Liz couldn’t help but want to thank them. She was given a second chance and she was going to take it. She placed her hand on her stomach and slipped her other hand under Liz’s shirt. Resting her palms against their stomach, she shut her eyes, concentrated hard, and both her hands glowed against their skin.

“What are you doing?” questioned Liz, trying to unsuccessfully move away. She didn’t know what her future self was doing. Once the glow disappeared, Liz felt oddly full—heavy, almost.

“I leave you with the greatest gift you could ever imagine—a reason to live and go on breathing,” said Future-Liz. “They’re coming for you. He’s coming for you.” Present-Liz tried to move away and was about to ask what was going on, but then she said, “For his child too.”

Liz’s eyes widened. “Child? What child? Oh my god, are you—”

Future-Liz stood up and began to walk away, still facing her. It was time to go. “Be strong, Liz Parker. Remember, the future is to be determined.”

“No, wait!” cried Liz, reaching out towards her twin, but she was already far too gone. Her body grew tired as her eyes began to fall shut. She thought, what’s happening? What’s going on?

“No, come back, please! Come back!” she yelled hoarsely. “COME BACK!”

As the world around her was growing darker, she heard her future-self say, “Your destiny awaits. Live great, live happily, Liz Parker.” But Liz knew what she had done to herself—her life was over, so how could she live happily?

Before her eyes fell tightly shut, Liz could’ve sworn she saw Future-Max and Future-Liz embrace each other in the far distance. She could hear their whispered words towards each other.

“Hey you,” smiled Future-Max as his fingers laced through Future-Liz’s. In present-Liz’s world, he had been gone for a month, but in this place, time didn’t exist for him. It felt as if he had only just disappeared from Liz’s world a second ago, but seeing his wife now made him feel as if he hadn’t seen her in years.

Future-Liz found herself lost in her husband’s familiar loving eyes. In each other’s eyes, despite knowing what the other had done with another partner, there was neither regret nor any apologies. “Hey back at you,” she replied. She stood on her tippee toes and pressed her lips sweetly against Max’s. Home, she thought, I’m finally home.

Liz could feel their love for each other grow in her heart. She couldn’t explain how, but it felt so familiar to her—the same feeling she had felt with Max, possibly even deeper. She swore she could feel their lips gently touch each others’ on her own. They were together again, reunited at last, together forever for all eternity. And in that moment, before she lost consciousness, she knew everything now would change for the better.

To be continued.
You guys all knew who the figure was. I have some very smart readers. Well, now I'm off to write two essays for my midterms. -_-*

[kyliemou]

I cherish my commenters: behrstars, garcia88, darkmoon, Egyptian_Kiss, paper, kay_b, XYZ, Natalie36, KiaraAlexisKlay, forever dreamer, and jake17.

Q&A:

This is a fantastic fic. I love the twist and turns. And every time I think I have something figured out, you pull the rug from under me. I can not wait for the next part. WooT!

Aww, thank you so much. That is very sweet of you.

Well that was quite the parting gift.

Isn’t it? I would love to be impregnated by any Jason Behr look-alike, just as long we get to have some “fun” first. =P

I thought that FL would just heal Liz. So sweet!

I would never make it that easy. ;P

Kylie, you have me in tears. When I read that part where Future Max and Liz meet again in...(hmmm, it's not really the after-life is it?) ...ok, in their own realm, I was touched by the love they have for each other. Max calling out to her, greeting her as Future Liz entered his world once again, I just melted. It reminded me of the Max and Liz I fell in love with in Season 1, before Tess came into the picture and wrecked everything. Now I'm anxious to see the interaction between Zan and Liz. And I wonder how Zan will react when he finds out that his child with Future Liz is in the present one. Can't wait for the next part. Good luck with the essays, though I know you'd do well.

Hi sweetie! Aw, I didn’t mean to make you cry, even if they are good tears. No crying! *hands you a tissue* It’s sort of like the after-life, but not really. Just take my word for it and know that they are in a happy place together. Thanks, I hope I did well as well. =\

What a superb chapter. Fantastic. Wonderful. Terrific. Splendid. Fabulous. Excellent. Marvellous. I just love your story. So FLiz was pregnant and transferred the baby to Liz now? Did Zan know? It kinda sounded as if he knew or maybe suspected?

LOL, those are a lot of great words there! Yes, FLiz was pregnant, not Liz, but now after the transfer, Liz is. Zan does not know she is pregnant.

good luck on those essays and can't wait to read some more this is an incredible story

Thank you!

Okay, seriously, this is truly made of awesome. I'd kinda figured the black, charred figure was FLiz...but then again, I was hesitant to actually stand by it since you are the mistress of twisted plotlines.
FMax and FLiz joining together one last time....the sweetness of that reunion as only couples who'd been together for years and hardship can, that was so an 'awww' moment. A perfect moment of FuturisticDreamers.
And it's not that I hate PresentMax...it's just that, like a first love who's hurt you, there's a bitterness toward him that causes the dislike. I used to be a straight up Dreamer, don't get me wrong, I used to love the pairing, but I didn't like the way that Max's character had evolved, and I definitely didn't care for some of his actions and decisions later on that cause me to jump 'ship' as it were. So if I'm one of the reasons your Dreamer/Max-lovers are leaving, than I apologize right now.
On the other hand....FLiz transferring Zan's baby into Present Liz....that just gave me chills and a huge grin on my face! I was worried about that-baby-that-might-have-been-that-you-just-confirmed and now I'm so glad he/she didn't whoosh away like FMax and FLiz. FLiz gave present Liz some really good advice, and was I mistaken in that while FLiz was exchanging the baby from her body to PresentLiz's....did she take some of PresentLiz's doubts as well? I don't know, that part was kinda fuzzy to me, I only got that FLiz gave PresentLiz Zan's baby.
And can I say that is a plot twister made of awesome! It's amazing and that is so going to change the dynamics here. PresentMax of course is going to be devastated, and Liz is going to take a lot of fire for that. *glares at the POD squad in advance* And I don't think that Zan is going to let the woman carrying his child to undergo such recrimination.
I can't wait for the New York set to meet the Roswell set....and I am thrilled to see what that 'first' meeting between Zan and Present Liz is going to be. I really hope they all are going to get along, since their survival and that of Earth (and Antar I guess) is at stake. Zan needs to give Little Nicky the ass whupping that he deserves, lol, and Rath needs to blast his pre-pubescant hide back to the Whirlwind Galaxy, lol.

Hi there, K. Wow, you sure did have a lot to write! “This is truly made of awesome” – this sounds exactly what my best friend says. LOL. I think most people figured out by the first part of Chapter 13 that the black figure was Liz, but I just had to drag it out, you know? I couldn’t just let FMax and FLiz disappear without a reunion. That would be blasphemy! =P
You are not causing my Max-Lovers/Dreamers to leave, but all the Max hatred is frightening them. I didn’t even know until I received a very alarming PM that brought it up to my attention. Would you hate me if I make Max likeable though? Remember, my Max is different from WB/UPN Max. Well, there may be the same tv-moments, but he’s different!
Whooshing away with the baby would be like an abortion, and why would anyone abort Zan’s baby? NO ONE! No, FLiz did not take away from of Liz’s doubt. If anything, Liz was still doubting, but before she could think anymore, she herself disappeared from my dream realm. FLiz only gave Liz the baby.
Hahahaha, you thought quite ahead , didn’t you? ;P

Wow, how do you come up with this?? And keep track of so many timelines and people within those timelines, when the writers of the show couldn't remember which year the characters were born in?!!! Why couldn't you write for Roswell??? It would have made more sense at times!!!
What an amazing part though, and so sad.
I'd love a dreamer reunion but I don't know if that would even be a possibility anymore. Liz is now pregnant with Zan's baby - how they'll explain that one I'll never know, especially without mentioning future people, and in that case, Max will find out the truth and what would stop them from being together? I think he'd want them to try again even though she'd having Zan's baby...then there's Zan...we know he loves her and no doubt she'll love him too...unless this goes double dipper (which I'm all for) I can't see a dreamer reunion being likely.
Mind you, saying that you're always coming up with totally original things that you never see coming...so maybe you've a plan already for how it'll work out. I don't know. Thats why I can't live on the hope of a dreamer reunion though I'd love one. I do have a soft spot for Max and would love it to work out!!!

Hello Rach! How do I come up with this stuff? I have no idea. I planned out the beginning, but now the rest of the story is kind… letting my fingers do the typing while my brain goes on snooze. I know it’s not possible, but that’s how I do it. I just type and see what comes out. I would have loved to work and write for Roswell. I'll get to meet the cast, go to parties with them, hang out, and oh--write a cementing scene! =D "Jason, Shiri, just go at it. We'll keep the cameras rolling and extra reels on the side, so just stay in character and whatever happens happens."

Can't wait for her to get to NYC...

Hello, hello Carrie my darling! Liz isn’t going to NYC. The NYC gang is coming to her. Did you forget?







Author’s Note: I love my feedbackers, I really do, but I received my first negative feedback. I was quite shocked, but it should be expected—every story will have its lovers and haters. It really wasn’t that bad like a bashing to the head, but the person didn’t like where I was going with the last three parts (all Chapter 13), and asked me to stop it and move on with the story. Her exact words: "Um this dream[,] is she dead or not[?] stuff is getting to be a bit much[,] can we get back to the story?" (I had to fix her errors. Incorrect grammar is my pet peeve.) LOL… =\ Oh well, I guess she’s getting what she wants since the story is moving on. I figured last chapter kind of made it clear that Liz is now out of her dream realm. Oh well, *sighs*

I would like to remind my readers that if they ever want a song that I use in my chapters, feel free to leave me a comment or a PM, and I’ll be more than glad to upload it for you.

Oh man, next week is my last week of summer school + finals and paper rewrites and presentations. EEK!








Chapter Fourteen:

You wanted a hero tonight.
Well I'm not made of steel.
I'm not made of steel,
but your secret's safe with me.

I can be anything
that you want me to be—
a holy cross, some sympathy
that reminds you not to bleed.
“Made Of Steel,” Our Lady Peace.

December 16, 2000, Saturday; Roswell, New Mexico:

When Liz awoke with a gasp, she found an IV stuck to her arm with machines beeping all over the place. Her eyes danced all over the white room before understanding she was in a hospital. She lifted her arms, only to be stopped by the plastic tubes embedded in her skin. She saw the gauze wrapped around her wrists, hiding her flawed skin from her sight. Right, I had killed myself, she thought. She stared at her bandaged wrists, recalling everything she could remember prior to and after the incident. I took the razor, cut myself, and then I was trapped in my—OH GOD! Quickly, her hands flew down to her stomach, her fingers lightly grazing against the span of her stomach. She felt different physically, not just emotionally. So it hadn’t been a dream—she met Future-Liz and saw Future-Max. She was now—

“Elizabeth Parker! What the hell were you thinking?!” cried out Maria as she came barreling in through the small door. Her blonde hair fluttered about as she ran over to the bed and held Liz’s face in her very warm and slightly sweaty hands. “What were you thinking, chica?”

“Maria, I—”

“Taking your own life? God, how could you be so stupid!” That wasn’t a question; it was a statement.

Unable to stop herself, Liz felt the urge to defend her actions and spoke, “You don’t know what I’m going through, Maria. What I went through.”

“Liz, nothing can be bad enough to make you kill yourself!”

“Ugh, Maria, don’t say anything. You don’t understand. You just don’t understand.”

Maria then placed her hands on her hip, glared at her, and with a scoff, she replied, “Of course I don’t understand! I mean, god, Liz! You, my bestest friend in the entire freaking galaxy, tried to kill herself. Do you know how horrible that made me feel? It’s as if I wasn’t enough to keep you here, that I wasn’t a great friend, that I, the best friend, didn’t even know the reason why you tried to off yourself., tat you didn’t even come to me for help! Didn’t you even think about how everyone else would feel? Why are you being so goddamn selfish?”

She flinched at Maria’s outburst. Maria was right. She was being selfish. She hadn’t realized how everyone around her would be affected. She hadn’t meant to make Maria feel unimportant. She was just so overwhelmed by all her problems, all her emotions that all she could think about was ending it all. Oh god, her parents—if they knew!

“Maria, are my parents—”

Maria held her hand up to cut her off. “No, as far as they’re concerned, you’re home, eating ice cream and watching tear-jerker chick flicks with your best friend.”

Liz looked down at her lap, feeling guilty, and then looked up. “Why didn’t you call them? Why didn’t you tell them I was here, what I did?”

“Oh, trust me, I thought about it! Just imagine: Hey Mr. and Mrs. Parker, guess what? Your daughter is in the hospital. Oh, it’s no big deal. SHE JUST TRIED TO FUCKING KILL HERSELF!” she yelled.

Liz flinched again. Maria did always have a way with words. “Thank you” was all she could muster up.

“You better thank me, ungrateful little—! If I told them, not only would they rush over here and possibly kill themselves on the road trying to get back here, they would never let you leave the house ever again. They would be more than willingly to send you off to the nut house!”

Liz nodded. Deep down, she was truly thankful to Maria for not calling her parents. She wouldn’t even know what to say or do if they knew. She shuddered at the thought of being locked up and diagnosed as a suicidal crazy. “What exactly happened? How did I end up here?”

“Well, after you tried to kill yourself,” said Maria with a glare, “Alex and I came over to try to cheer you up, but you didn’t answer, so we let ourselves in. We went into your room and found the bathroom door locked. You wouldn’t answer so we tried to break it down. But you know, Alex doesn’t have any strength in his lanky body and I obviously don’t as well. So we called over the Czechs.”

Liz’s hand flew to her mouth as she tried to cover her gasp. Oh god, they found her? The room began to spin and Liz felt sick to her stomach. Maria took her hand, gripping tightly as if Liz was going to disappear any second. “When the door opened, when we found you, oh god… There was so much blood. It was all over the place—in the water, on the floor. You were covered in it! It was like that elevator scene from The Shining except my best friend was caught in it! Max tried to heal you, but you had already lost so much blood. He was able to stop the blood flow and prevent you from crossing over, and then we took you to the hospital.”

Maria then wrapped her arms around her. “God, Liz, do you have any idea how devastated I was? Did you even bother to think about how lonely I would be without you? I love you so much. You’re my best friend, my sister! Please don’t ever do something like this again.”

“I’m sorry, Maria. I won’t.”

“Promise me, Liz. PROMISE ME.”

“I promise. I’m sorry.”

The door then flew open and everyone else piled in, practically fighting one another to get through the door. They all spoke at the same time and all Liz could hear was her name being shouted, how stupid she was, and if she ever did this again, they would bring her back just to kill her themselves. Alex and Kyle were shouting her name as if they couldn’t believe she was in front of them. Michael was the one calling her names. Isabel was giving her sullen looks. One by one, except Max who stood in the corner staring at her and Tess who found the outside world past the window more interesting, they took her into their arms, crying with happiness that she was alright. In this moment, she forgot all about the pain from before and felt at home. It was as if everything was back to normal, before they abandoned her. She knew they were all right though; she had acted stupidly and now she learned from it.

“Guys, can I get a moment alone with Liz?” asked Max, giving them a look that said his request was more of a command instead. Kyle gave Liz a look and his mouth curved to the side as if to say she was in big trouble. Max turned around to watch them go and when the door shut behind them, there was a moment of silence. Liz held her breath as she heard the heavy breathing of Max. He hadn’t hugged her. Obviously, from his rigid stance, he was furious. He then whipped around with a growl, his teeth bared at her. “What the hell were you thinking?!” Liz jumped at the sudden yell. “God, Liz, how can you be so fucking stupid?” It felt as if he flew to her side because suddenly, she was in his arms with his hands stroking her hair. She buried her nose into the crook of his neck and as soon as his scent filled her senses, she felt nostalgic. She had missed this so much. His arms were around her, holding her to his body as if he hadn’t seen her in years. She missed feeling his strong frame enveloped around her.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured into his shirt, balling his shirt in her fists.

As soon as she spoke those words, he tensed up once again. His arms fell and he took a step away from her to observe her petite frame on the hospital bed. He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. What was he supposed to say? How was he supposed to react? Grinding his teeth, he let his anger roll out of him. “No, sorry isn’t going to cut it! We’ve always had our problems, but god, Liz… Trying to kill yourself? You of all people should know I would never want that—for you to be dead. YOU OF ALL PEOPLE SHOULD KNOW THIS!”

“I won’t do it again.”

“You better not! Do you know how much you scared me? You were so still, so pale, so cold! You weren’t even conscious. I kept calling your name and I thought—… I thought you were already dead! Do you know how much it reminded me of the day you were shot at the Crashdown? I thought it was happening all over again, that I was losing you, that I—… that I couldn’t save you this time!”

Liz knew apologizing wouldn’t change a thing, but it was all she could do, all she could offer. She meekly replied, “I’m sorry.”

His fingers were permanently attached to his hair. He looked as if he was going to pull out his silky hairs in frustration. “Do you even know what it was like for me to see you dead? That day at the Crashdown, I nearly died myself and when I saw you yesterday, I—… I lost it! I FUCKING LOST IT, LIZ!” he screamed, saliva foaming at the sides of his mouth.

Liz didn’t know what to say or how to react. This whole time, she was worried about not being with Max, that Max was going to be with Tess, but she never thought about how he would feel if she had died. He would be in worse shape than Maria. God, she never even thought about what would happen, how they would all feel… Was she really that selfish?

“I risked my own life, the life of Michael and Isabel, to save yours, and you throw it away so recklessly! Do you not appreciate what I did for you? I don’t regret saving you, but do you know what I went through for you?” he continued to yell. He stopped himself short of telling him what he saw in the White Room, what Agent Pierce forced him to watch—her death. He never told her and he didn’t want to. He didn’t want her to know. “I won’t always be around to save you, Liz Parker. But you know I will try. So you better not do this again, or so help me god, I will—”

“I know, I know. You’ll kill me.” Liz really didn’t know what else to say, so she went with humor instead.

“Not funny,” growled Max as his nostrils flared.

Liz held up her arms in surrender and then brought them back down when she saw his eyes dart to her wounds. She slipped her arms under the blanket and brought it up to her chin. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’m sorry.” As she apologized, she rested her hand against her stomach under the cloth. Beside just her friends, besides Max, she now had another reason to go on living.

- - - -

Liz was grateful to have aliens as friends. She went home later that night. Michael managed to delete her files from the computer system and Tess mind-warped everyone to make it seem as if she was never there in the first place. Of course, she wasn’t staying at home alone. Alex, Kyle, and Maria decided to stay over as suicide watchdogs in case she tried to take her own life again. She told them that she wouldn’t, but they just wanted to be sure that she was safe. It was quite weird when she was back in her room, confronted with her bathroom.

“Michael and Max tried to clean it up as best as they could,” said Kyle, appearing by her door. This information shocked her a little. She couldn’t even imagine what it was like for them to see and clean up her blood, especially Max. She shuddered in horror. “Liz, you know I’m not religious, but when I saw you lying there in the hospital, I prayed. Oh god, I prayed like never before. I called on Buddha and God to help you. I—”

“Thank you, Kyle,” she said, placing her hand on his shoulder. “I’m fine now.”

“Liz, did you… Did you do this because of what we did? I mean, of what the group thought of us?”

Liz blinked. Kyle wanted to know if he was the reason for her attempted suicide. “Don’t even think that, Kyle. You are not the reason!”

“I just… I mean, it fits the time, you know? We pretended to,” he trailed off, scuffling his feet from side to side. “And they found out and we were on the outside for a while there. I just don’t—”

“I promise you, Kyle, you were not the reason.”

He nodded, slightly satisfied, and went downstairs to join Alex and Maria.

She took a step into her bathroom. It was pure white, whiter than before. Despite this, in her eyes, she felt she could still see her blood stained on the porcelain tub and on the tile floor. She saw the razor that she had killed herself with, dangling dangerously on the edge of the sink. Cringing at the thought of how close to death she had been, she closed the door, not wanting to be reminded of it. It was bad enough she still bared the wounds. Max had tried to heal them in the hospital so they wouldn’t leave a scar, but she wanted them to heal normally. She wanted to be reminded of this incident. She wanted to remember.

She remembered Maria mentioning that Isabel and Michael would stop by after she and the guys left. There was no mention of Max though. It wasn’t as if she had expected Max to come with them, but she hoped. She hoped he would come, profess his love to her once again, and hold her in his arms while she slept. That’s what she needed—his love to help her get by. But she doubt he would show. Like Maria, she knew he felt unimportant in her life. After all, she did cut her wrists with the intent of never coming back, without any care for others around her.

As Liz laid in bed with her fingers gently grazing her stomach, she thought about Zan, the dupes, and her future baby. She, herself, slept with Future-Max, but she didn’t get pregnant. Her future-self slept with Zan and she got pregnant. Now that Future-Liz was gone, she was carrying the child for her—Zan’s child. How truly messed up her life was. She doubted that any normal teenager was saved from the brink of death from a bullet and slits to the wrists, friends with aliens, slept with their love from the future, met their future-self, and carried their future-self’s child whom the father was their love’s twin brother. God, that’s confusing, she thought. Liz tried not to laugh at the absurdity of it all, but it was all true. Yep, if her parents knew she had tried to take her own life plus this information, they were ship her away as fast as their fingers could dial 911. Doctors would think she was crazy if they ever knew. She could just picture it:

“And Ms. Parker, you believe you met your future ex-boyfriend?”

“No, doctor, you got that wrong. It was my ex-boyfriend from the future, and I don’t believe it happened. It did happen.”

He would scribble down some notes in his notebook, hidden from her view. She could picture him writing down the words, “Patient is delusional.”

“And you had sexual intercourse with him?”

She would reply, “Yes.” And he would write, “Patient may have been raped by an older man.”

“And you met your future self?”

She would nod.

“And what was your future self like?”

“She still looks like me, just older, with short hair and she was wearing leather too. Oh, she’s pregnant too.”

“Pregnant? Who is the father?”

“The father is my ex-boyfriend’s twin.”

“He has a twin?”

“He does now!” she would chuckle out.

“Are you not pregnant now?” he would ask.

“She transferred the baby to me.”

“Transferred? Interesting word. Why would you say ‘transferred’?”

“Oh, did I forget to tell you? She has alien powers and she gave me her baby.”

The doctor will write, “Patient believes her future self was impregnated by an imaginary twin of her ex-boyfriend who now gave her present self the child.”

“So what’s my diagnosis, doc?”

The doctor, of course, will look at her and then stamp the words “MENTALLY UNSTABLE” and “SUICIDE WATCH” on her file.

Breaking out of her dream scenario, her head snapped towards the hallway when she heard the downstairs door click shut. Sitting up, she walked out of her room and peered down the stairs. She held her breath when she saw Max at the bottom of the stairs. Maria, Alex, and Kyle had left, and Max came. Just as she was about to head down the stairs, she saw a flash of blonde hair. “Isabel?” she breathed to herself. But it wasn’t Isabel. It was Tess. She watched as they sat down together on the couch. Liz’s hands were already clenched into fists.

“I think I should go up and check on her,” said Max, starting to get up from the sofa, feeling a bit uncomfortable, but Tess stopped him by placing her hand on his wrist.

“I think she’s sleeping. Alex said Liz hadn’t come down since they got here.”

Max’s eyes shifted around the room, his hand rubbing against his thighs, and nodded in agreement. “Okay, you’re right.”

Liz wanted to go down and make herself known, but she couldn’t. Her goal was still to get Max and Tess together. She pushed aside the growing sadness that tried to overwhelm her again. As the television clicked on with the help of Tess’s hand, she watched as Tess rested her head against Max’s shoulder. Together they sat watching the box. Though Max looked like he was ready to run, with a scowl and her hand against her stomach, Liz couldn’t help but feel anger. She slowly walked to her room and locked herself inside, falling asleep with tears slipping down her face.

Things were going as Future-Max planned, just not of her own.

- - - -

December 18, 2000, Monday; Roswell, New Mexico:

This past weekend had been such hell. Everyone had been shaken up the events that had occurred. A normal teenager life was something they knew they would never have. As usual, they all tried to get back into the swing of things, but everything was a mess. They knew their lives were falling apart and no one knew how to stop it. Everything had changed last summer when the pod squad found out about their past lives and their destiny. Liz slowly grew apart from the group because of it, but Maria, Alex, and Kyle managed to get closer. They knew it was that moment that had changed everything—that moment in the cave—but most couldn’t help shake off the feeling that it all also changed Liz, but for the worst.

Michael was one of them who knew something was terribly wrong with Liz. He knew it was her choice to leave Max so he could be with Tess, his supposed-wife, but he saw how much it had crushed the couple to part. It was ironic because ever since Max saved Liz, he had been nagging about them being together—it wasn’t safe, they weren’t even of the same species, and much more. But after seeing Liz walk away, he felt as if light had been shed and his past thoughts disappeared. These two were in love and it wasn’t just puppy love—it was real love. Sure, he had commitment problems (Maria made it known to him every day), but even he could see their feelings for one another. He understood why she left. If he were in her place, he’d do the same, but only he would never had come back. Ever since Liz came back, she had been more and more forcefully in pursuit of getting Max and Tess together as if her feelings didn’t matter, as if her feelings didn’t exist. That wasn’t like Liz, so unlike the Liz he had read about in her journal. The Liz he knew was strong, but she was never the one that was able to ignore or hide her feelings like she had been doing lately. It was as if she knew what would happen in Max and Tess didn’t get together. It was like her goal in life, like her life depended on it. What he couldn’t understand was why or what had changed.

As he sat in a booth with his cooking apron hung over his shoulder, he watched Liz from afar who was setting up the tables to open the Crashdown. The whole gang was sitting here, feeling the need to be around Liz some more. Alex was sitting in booth with Isabel; they were whispering to each other. Max and Tess were talking over by the counters, which he could tell ticked Liz off. Maria and Kyle were trying to bug the hell out of Liz, which resulted in her constantly scrunching up her face in aggravation. Michael watched as she wiped down the counters, her wrists still wrapped with gauze. The cuts were healing quite nicely, but were still covered in such red anger. He remembered asking her if he should get Max to heal them for her, to make the scars disappear, but she said she wanted to keep them to remember. He understood that part too. He still had scars of when Hank beat him as a child. He kept it to remember, to remind himself never to put himself in that situation again.

Liz went to pull some of the remaining chairs down when he quickly stood up and helped her. She smiled because he had been acting like her big brother lately. Well, he had always acted like her older brother, but now, since she tried to kill herself, he had been overly protective, taking the role of an older brother to the extreme.

“Michael, I can do it,” she said as she placed one of the chairs down onto its feet.

He replied, “Don’t worry about it. I’ll do it,” as he flipped over a chair.

“I’m not an invalid.” She felt everyone was treating her as if she would break if she made the wrong movement. God, she had tried to kill herself, but she wasn’t handicapped. Perhaps just emotionally, but not physically. She was fine, she really was.

He placed his hand on her shoulder, squeezed it lightly, and gave her a weak smile. “I know you’re not. Look, I just want to help, okay?” he said. Liz sighed, knowing he wouldn’t stop, so she nodded.

As they took the chairs down together, as the group tried to get past this very large bump in their life, the Crashdown doors swung open. Then came strolling in were the dupes.

To be continued.

[kyliemou]

XOXO: paper, kay_b, XYZ, roswell3053, KiaraAlexisKlay (x2), forever dreamer, Egyptian_Kissand jake17, ShatteredDreamer, and ReidsLdy27.

Q&A:

To be continued.

Ok. This is just WRONG!

HAHAHAHAHA!

Are we going to hostage chapters again? I'll give you Ch 11 of F&AD if you post NOW!

You post, I post. Same with Carrie.

I knew I shouldn’t have used all the extremely good words in my last review, now I have to get a dictionary to find more words for this awesome chapter!
Lets see… wow, grand, outstanding, striking, breath-taking , remarkable, amazing, incredible, tremendous… I just love to read this story! And a new chapter so soon! You made my day, girl! I should study for my up coming exams but this is soooo much better.
I felt really bad for Liz when everyone was yelling at her in the hospital. I understand that they all worried about her and that they are angry and in shock, but it is not a very intelligent move to pick on her like that, when she just woke up. It’s not helping, but could make matters worse. But the way you wrote it is very believable. I can imagine that the gang might have reacted like that.
So now the story really picks up! This should be very entertaining to read how Max will react to the NY gang. And to the baby. Don’t take this one negative review to serious. That is one. And just for the record, I loved the chapters. And they were necessary for Liz's character. Something would be missing, if you just have a chapter where she cuts herself and then wakes up in the hospital. The inner struggle was marvellous written.
I know you probably have a lot to do but plz …. Chapter 15 soon?!!???!!?!

You are too much, J! =) I think you might run out of words later. Hahahaha. Thank for letting me know your input about the all of Chapter 13. After I read the negative comment, I was wondering if it was a good idea in the first place.

I'm glad that Present Liz and Michael are bonding in a sister-brother way...
And Kyle made me want to cry! He thought he was responsible for Liz trying to kill herself! Poor Kyle.
And Maria...wow! She was right, and she wasn't, and it was selfish on Liz's part to an extent...but in Liz's defense she had given up everything she could think in order to make sure the world didn't end so in her mind she figured she didn't have anything left. Strange but skewed sense of logic, but when you're depressed and worn out and emotionally exhausted you tend to not make sense anyway.
Max was...awww....what he felt makes so much sense. And I could totally see the group doing that hospital scene as well. I almost feel sorry for Tess...almost.
I don't hate you for making Max likeable...honestly, I started out likeing Max so for me it's no big deal. My thing is that it's rare in the UC section for me to actually like Max. And you've done what no one else has, is to root for Max even though I'm wanting Zan and Liz! LOL. Of course, Douple Dipping is always acceptable, hehe.
Hmmmm.......Liz still has her doubts. Well, at least now that she has Zan's baby she won't think about offing herself for a really long time, lol. Not that anyone will give her the oppurtunit to do so.
Oh...I'm so excited the Dupes are in town!

I wish the show developed more of Michael and Liz’s bonding. We all knew they were good friends, but we just never really got to see more of their scenes together. With Kyle, I’m surprised none of the characters on the show confronted Kyle, or why Kyle never asked any more questions about what Liz made him do. I kind of wanted to address that just a little.
I’m pretty sure everyone agrees with me when I say we all would like to be double dipped. ;P
And

I was just so excited that THE DUPES ARE HERE! Da Man n his crew have hit da Crashdown and things are gonna light up now!
And I too, noticed that Tess was very...anitpathic I guess. I figured she'd be at least a little interested in Liz's condition, even if she didn't like her due to her 'rival' status.
Poor Kyle...he worries me. I know I didn't touch on that earlier but I am. Poor Buddha Boy. Kyle is my squishy and I will name him Squishy and he shall be mine. *nods*
Re-reading it, I can agree with EK in the fact that I'm surprised Liz didn't do the self-imposed guilt trip thing by bringing it up over and over as Maria was yelling at her, or snapping at her to shut the fuck up.
I too can't wait to see not only the Dupes reactions on the whole, but how like EK said, how the individuals react to her. Zan for obvious reasons is going to be the most complicated, I'm not even going to go into all the issues that have issues with their issues issues. Rath I'm wondering how he's going to take a younger, more innocent Liz than the one he'd bonded with back in New York. I mean, if Rath was brotherly protective over her back then when the Future Liz was rough and tumble, how is he going to deal with a younger, less tried Liz? Also wondering if he's going to be jealous of Michael's role as de facto surrogate brother in Present Liz's life. Lonnie I never really thought had bonded as well with Liz, but I do know that she like the Future Liz, and probably was amused and amazed at the bonding between the General and the Time Slider. Ava seems to have bonded with Future Liz on a we-shared-a-guy kinda way that Tess and Liz probably could have but yet Tess is being a stinker,:P
And I'm wondering how everybody as a whole is going to react to the Dupes knowing Liz, and Liz knowing about FutureLiz and the Dupes, and how they're going to react to The Baby. Me, I'm kinda expecting everybody to blow up at Liz again, accusations will fly, hurt will abound, and then Liz will finally have enough and just EXPLODE. Here's the way I see it going down.
I am so looking forward to more...you can't leave us hanging here when there is more Zan to see and obsess over, comic relief in the form of Rath and Kyle to be had, bitch slamming and slapping and fighting to go on, and the last of the secrets between the two groups to be aired and assimililated, and oh Bob! We need to save Bob from getting alien pushed over the cliff! Poor Bob.....let us have a moments of silence for Bob.
:bows head: Okay. But hurry back!

OMG, another long quote. You know, what you wrote in italics could be turned into a fic of your own! LOL. I’m so tempted to steal your lines! Well, technically, Liz was just so overwhelmed with being alive again and being pregnant that she’s not feeling too guilty anymore. She’s alive and trying to move on. She was upset because she knew Maria was right and she accepted that. I think when she was in her dream realm, it was her confronting her guilt and all the pain she had gone through. After that, when she woke up, it was as if she had already been “cured.” I hope that makes sense or help.
You also raise a lot of good questions, but don’t fear—I will be addressing every single one in my chapters.
Oh man, I’ll find a way to include Bob! I love Bob the Jeep. Every time I walk down the street and see a Jeep Wrangler (even though it’s different from the show’s), I squeal a little.

So...with the arrival of the dupes we're leaving the land of 'wow, thats great and so fantastic!!' to the land of 'Woah Thats so freakin awesome!!!'
I love it!!!
I'm glad they've made friends and are being a group kinda again, though they have this rodent still trying to make herself known. You only have to mention her name and I'm thinking 'Man, what is with her constant presence?' Grrr at her!!!
Max's reaction to her 'incident' was sweet and there are still feelings there!!! Why is the Roswell world so full of angst? Mind you with the arrival of Zan, what are the actual chances of us remembering who Max is??
I'm so excited about how they'll react to Liz. I mean they don't know that she knows what happened between Zan and Future Liz, and they're not gonna expect her to know that they knew her future self. Ooo, you have to post again real soon!!!

Ugh, the rodent… It pains me to write her in.
Well, I’m filled with angst and since Roswell was overwhelmed with angst, it makes sense why I like it so.
Hey, don’t forget about Max. He’s the “original Max,” if that makes any sense.

*shakes head* Wow. Alright I can't say I didn't expect the chapter to end that way because if I were the author that's exactly what I would have done. I loved Liz's mental conversation with a shrink- that was funny and too true. Kyle thinking that Liz killed herself because of what they "did" together was realistic- anyone would've reacted that way- though I'm not convinced he has let it go, usually self-imposed guilt goes on quite a bit longer. Max's reaction was...I'm not sure. I understand why Max would say what he said, but if I'm picking it apart I'm unsure if that's the reaction I would've expected. Maria's depicted reaction was completely spot on; though I when she was railing on Liz I was certain Liz would either A) Explode or B) Be catatonic- reliving her experience over and over as she was being yelled at.
The frustration Liz felt at everyone clustering around her and treating her like a box marked fragile was something I could imagine, just as I accepted her resignation to Michael's help. Tess bothers me, I never particularly liked her character before she was scripted as evil in the show, and her passive reaction to Liz's suicide bespeaks of her uncompassionate nature along with that heart she seems to have been born without. I don't know how I would react to the whole transferred pregnancy thing, but I'm fairly certain now that the daddy is in town Liz will have a little more on her plate- if anything the anxiety level is about to increase ten-fold.
I'm excited about the dupes reaction to the group, but more specifically their individual reactions to Liz herself. I wonder if any of them will sense that she is now linked to their unit in an unseen way, or if they will be drawn to her purely because of the fact that she is in someway already like them. Taking a step back to look at each individual character and what connects them in their own cliques, I see that Liz is more like the dupes than the royal 4, or even her own human friends. When Liz took it upon herself to save the world her own altrusism opened her to a darker side of herself. The fact that Liz tried to kill herself, the fact that she went somewhere the others of her group couldn't possibly understand sets her apart from them now. The dupes being who they are, having grown up in the circumstances which they have, and more importantly being more alien already gives them a rougher persona. This is bound to get interesting in a hurry and I'm looking forward to your next chapter. Update soon. EK!

You just analyzed the chapter as if you were going to write a research paper. O.O Wow. I’m literally speechless. I don’t know what to say, but agree to most of what you wrote. Sometimes when you get funny humor like Liz and the shrink, that’s my sarcastic odd humor kicking in.

Kylie!!!!!!!!! OMG what an ending!!!!!! So happy to see you back so soon! OH wait a second that means it's my turn again huh? uh oh
The last line ... pure genius!! You've got everyone dying for more! Especially me! Excellent job

Yes, Carrie, I do believe it’s your turn. =D Perhaps the sequel to Stranded in return? I’m trying to get back on track of my usual posting schedule which is once a week instead of a week and a half or longer. Next week is finals week, so after Friday, I should be free to work on Chapter 15. I kind of wanted to give you guys this part before school takes up all my time again. I figured it will hold you over until the next post—whenever that is.

Great part. I'm a little perturbed about the Max/Tess closeness although I haven't quite figured out if it's one sided or not. Tess doesn't give a rat's ass about Liz's condition so her being on "suicide watch" with Max was just another way for her to spend one on one time with him. I hope Max isn't too busy feeling sorry for himself to realize what Tess is up to.
Yay the Dupes are here! I can't wait for everyone's reaction to each other, esp. Zan's reaction to Liz and Max's reaction to Zan's reaction to Liz. (I think that made sense). Can't wait for the next part!

That made perfect sense to me. This chapter will show you a little of Zan and Max and Liz’s interaction. As for Tess, I do hope I will address all Tess-related questions in a chapter sometime in the future, if not near.

Ok, I'm a bad reader b/c I've been reading this story from the beginning and I think this the first time I've posted fb. I sarry hon!! What I should have told you from the beginning is that this is an amazing story and so very well written. I don't know what to say about the last chapter because everyone else has already said what I was going to! But, I'm going to go with the basics: I loved Liz waking up in the hospital because everyone came to her rescue, I loved Micheal being all overprotective with Liz (even though I always felt like that was an underlying feeling/current between Liz and Micheal on the show), and of course I LOVED the dupes FINALLY showing up! Like everyone else has already said, can't wait for everyone's reaction to them and vice versa. Keep up the wonderful work and I am anxiously awaiting the next chapter of greatness!

No, you’re not a bad reader. It’s fine with me. As long as someone comments wanting more chapters, I’m good with that. =] So don’t worry about it, but thank you for posting a comment!







Author’s Note: I changed Chapter 13A’s song. When I heard the song, “We Deal In Dreams” by Live, at work and I thought it fit perfectly (and since I already used the original song twice, I thought it would be better if I changed it). So to those who have been saving this story, change the song (post: here).

Some of you raised many interesting questions about Liz, the Dupes, Kyle, Tess, and so on—I will be addressing every single one in my story, so don’t worry about holes just yet. This story is far from over! =D

Some of you wondered why Liz wasn’t beating herself up for what she did when Maria was yelling at her. I saw the moment when she was in her dream realm to be where she got over what she did, where she confronted her pain, and was over her guilt of her actions. When Maria starts to go off on her, she understands Maria was right thus agreeing with her. Since her guilt is over and because she agrees her actions were stupid, she took it a lot better than most would (since most do not have the opportunity to confront themselves in their dreams).

Also, just to let you know, I am currently working on EIGHT new stories, but I’m trying to work on one each to its completion instead working on the rest at the same time. So if I’m lucky, after the end of this story (which is far from now), I’ll have another story for you guys! So I’ll be around for a while. =P

Other than that, let’s skip the rest of the boring author’s note and go straight to the Dupes! =D

There are lines taken from “Meet The Dupes” (Season 2, Episode and “Max In The City” (Season 2, Episode 9). All spelling errors are intentional.








Chapter Fifteen - Part A:

… And you are the one that has stolen my heart.
And I'm telling you from the start.

I never thought that you would come.
I never thought that I could love like this.
This feeling inside me is growing.
I never thought that you would come.
“I Never Thought That You Would Come,” Loni Rose.

December 18, 2000, Monday; Roswell, New Mexico:

Pandemonium—that’s what it was.

It wasn’t every day that someone stumbled upon his or her twin if he or she even had one. But for the pod squad, they had doppelgangers—twins—literally strangers with their own faces, breathing and living, clothed in leather and covered in tattoos. It was as if someone had taken a mirror image of the Roswell set, but the image was manipulated to give the other group a grungy appearance. The dupes came as if a tornado had carried them into the café, breezing in past the open doors with the door bell furiously ringing above their heads. They took long slow strides and moved with such grace that one could’ve sworn the world went into slow-motion. The wind flipped the sides of their hair. They walked with such confident as if they were models on a runway.

Gaping only for a second, the Roswell set quickly stood up in fear; the humans clung onto their alien counterpart, but Liz clutched onto her own arms because she had no one. These newcomers were the enemy. They were shape-shifters. Their lives were at risk. That’s what everyone thought at first, everyone except Liz.

Silence. It was dead silent. Eyes were wide, mouths were dropped open, and glowing hands were in the air, ready to assume their positions for a battle. As the bell above the door calmed down and the doors closed, the two sets stood face-to-face. More silence. Both groups analyzed each other, wary of one another. The Roswell group was confused. Just who were these people? Why did they have their faces? Why were they dressed that way? Were they shape-shifters coming to kill them? Would these doppelgangers assume their identities, fooling the humans?

Zan stood tall, his head held up high, unafraid. Leader was written all over his body. Max was the same. Both were tense and calculating a plan in their minds. When Zan saw Liz, he felt his mouth go dry. It was as if someone had kicked him in the gut. It was only a few hours ago when he broke down on the side of the road, crying his eyes out and heartbroken for the first time in his life. Liz was gone yet she was standing right in front of him. The sunlight that came through the window shined on her brunette hair, creating a glow around her. She looked an angel to him, an angel who decided to come back to him after disappearing. “Liz,” he breathed out. Not realizing this wasn’t the Liz that he held in bed, that he made love to, that disappeared only hours ago, for he was too overwhelmed with the sudden image of her in front of him, he moved to go to her only to be stopped by his self—Max, that is. He stared at the hand that resembled his own on his chest and bared his teeth in anger. “Take yer hands off of meh,” he growled through clenched teeth as he brought his face closer to his double, “if ya know what is good for ya.”

Max couldn’t understand how this shape-shifter knew Liz’s name, but damned in hell would he let this alien go near her. He lost her once, no, twice, and he wasn’t going to lose her again for a third time. Once was enough, twice was pushing it, and thrice was bound for failure. Glancing quickly at Liz, ignoring her beauty, he was pleased she was at a somewhat far distance from this alien. If this enemy tried to get through him, he would have enough time to stop him, enough time to protect Liz. As his hand began to glow in a threatening manner, Max stepped forward to the man who wore his face till their noses were almost touching. Fiery auburn eyes met with fiery auburn eyes.

“You’re going to have to go through me,” spoke Max.

“You flexin’ on me, Duke Number Two?” growled Zan, baring his teeth at his twin once again. “Take off yer hands before I do somethin’ ya gonna regret.”

“No chance, asshole,” replied Max, intently staring at Zan.

Angered by his twin’s insolence, Zan pushed Max off. With a little help from Zan’s powers, Max stumble back further than a normal shove would. Max regained his balance and charged after him, ready to throw a glowing punch at his double. Liz knew they were going to fight one another till the either was no longer standing. She couldn’t allow this to happen. She knew Zan and the dupes were good. She watched as Zan’s hand became bright with energy, his arm in the air ready to throw down. How was she going to tell her group that? They can’t know! If they did, Future-Max and Future-Liz’s plans would be ruined! As if today was in her favor, she saw Kyle begin to move to sit next to Tess. She quickly stuck her foot out a little and tripped him. With a yelp, Kyle fell forward into the two bodies that were ready to lunge at one another, but then he kept running with a scream till he reached the other side, afraid to be hit with the alien powers. Alex watched with an amused confused expression.

“Kyle, what are you doing?” asked Tess.

Kyle looked over at Liz with wide eyes. He glared when he saw her put on an innocent face as if she had no idea what she had done. “I—Li—She—I...! Umm… I’m stopping a bloodbath?” said a confused Kyle. “Who knows what they could do to each other? I mean, why aren’t you guys stopping this? Buddha said—”

“This isn’t the time for Buddha, Kyle,” said Alex who threw his arm over his friend’s shoulder and led him down to a seat.

Liz mouthed words of apology to Kyle. She had to get a way to stop them and Kyle just happened to be the closest. She then turned her attention to the two men that changed her life. “Zan,” whispered Liz, which caused Max’s and Zan’s eyes to snap to her. She hadn’t expected him to look so much like Max. If anything, he resembled more of Future-Max with the leather. She wasn’t even sure what she was expecting; only that Future-Liz told her that their personalities were different. In her mind, she did think of Zan as the splitting image of Max, but imagining in your mind and seeing right before your eyes were two different things. She took in his tattered clothes, the exposed chiseled muscles, the tattoos that inked his skin, and the piercings that dangled on his skin. She didn’t know what to think, but she felt her heart thump harder and faster. His intense stare raised goosebumps on her skin, making her shiver with anticipation, but then she realized it wasn’t just him staring at her. The doubles were all looking at her as if she grew a second head and her arms became tentacles.

Max was looking at her too. “Liz?” he asked, curiously. In his eyes, this alien knew Liz and Liz knew him back. But that was impossible… Wasn’t it?

Zan moved to her again, but this time he was stopped by Rath’s arm on his shoulder. He turned around to command Rath to let him go, but before he could speak, Rath spoke low enough for only him to hear, “It’s not her.”

“Rath, what are ya talkin’—“

Hiding his face behind Zan’s head, he whispered, “Dat’s not Liz. The Liz ya knew is gone.”

Rath watched as something extinguish in Zan’s eyes. He felt guilty for doing this to Zan, but he had to make Zan understand that Future-Liz was gone, that this younger version of Liz wasn’t who Zan had mistaken her for, that this Liz belonged to his twin. He watched as his friend turn his eyes back to the brunette with a sullen face. Rath was also sad about Future-Liz’s disappearance. He, himself, wanted to jump for joy when he saw younger-Liz, but he knew this Liz didn’t know them, that she’d freak out if they ran and hugged her as if they were the best friends. He noted the torn look on Lonnie’s and Ava’s faces. They were all controlling themselves around her, but they couldn’t help but feel relaxed knowing she was in their presence. Zan glanced back at Rath, nodding as if to say he was correct.

Lonnie turned away from Liz as if to gather her courage and spoke. “Yo, so we’s gonna jus’ stand ‘ere and stare, or are we’s gonna sit and have a chat?” she said, addressing the lot. She turned to Ava and muttered, “So cornball,” as she rolled her eyes. Ava could only laugh in response.

“What the hell is going on?!” cried Maria as she clung to Michael in fear.

Rath’s eyes trailed to the blonde with the full red lips. His eyes wandered all over her curvy body, appreciating the orange mini-skirt she was wearing. Her pale legs seemed to last forever, disappearing under that short fabric. He could’ve sworn that if he stood closer to her, he could smell her heat. “Hey baby, ya look good enough to eat,” he said, wiggling his tongue out at her. He saw the blonde’s eyes go wide in horror. He wanted to laugh at her shocked expression, noting that she seemed very innocent. He watched as his double try to leap at him only to be stopped by some short bulky jock-lookalike guy who was telling him to calm down. Then the short blonde tried to do the same, cursing obscenities at him, but she was stopped by the same jock guy who was struggling. What a spitfire, Rath thought. He quickly held his hands up in surrender and smiled. So you belong to my twin, he thought, Nice! He’s got good taste. He took in the Metallica shirt his twin wore, the tattered black jeans, and the spiky hair. Addressing his own group, he said, “I approve,” pointing to Michael.

“You look exactly like me!” exclaimed Isabel to Lonnie.

“No shit,” sarcastically said Ava, rolling her eyes at this Roswell group’s stupidity.

Lonnie scrunched up her face in disgust. “I doubt that, cornball. What da fuck did ya do to mah face—wash it wit’ bleach?” Isabel’s mouth dropped open as her hand rose to her face in shock. Never had anyone addressed her that way. She was always known for her beauty, known for the drooling men who lusted after her; she practically ruled West Roswell High! Alex blinked in confusion. Isabel’s twin was calling Isabel ugly! But they look exactly alike, he thought, This is too weird.

Ava snorted. “Lon’, ya think ya got it bad? Look at mah twin. She looks like she’s got a pole up her a-hole, among a few other things.” She studied her double—super curly dry blonde hair with too much makeup caked on her face. “She looks like a freakin’ gerbil, you know, like a rodent that ate all the makeup on Earth!” She stuck her left hand out while the right hand bunched up together at the finger tips as if to curse at her with the Italian curse hand gesture. “Want a treat? I’d give ya some pellets if ya do a trick for meh,” taunted Ava.

Tess glared at her with slit eyes, instantly hating this person who wore her face. “Screw you!” She was ready to lung at Ava, but Kyle stopped her. He seemed to be stopping everyone from fighting today.

Lonnie laughed. “Man, who knew da hood would fuck up da other set?”

“I don’t think it’s da hood, man. I think it’s dis fuckin’ crazy town,” said Rath, jumping into the conversation. “Oh man, da second we passed dat sign, ‘Welcome to Ros-hell,’ I knew dis town was off its rockers!”

As the three laughed, Zan quietly watched Liz. This Liz was younger, but she still had the same large brown eyes. She was still just as petite with the luscious dark hair, only her hair was longer than his Liz. He had sex with her future self, but he wondered what it would be like fucking her with his fingers wrapped around her long hair. He wanted to tug on her hair as he took her from behind, her cute tush cupped in his hands. He wanted to hear her cry out as her smooth back arched towards him. Smirking, he could tell Liz was getting a little nervous with his staring that undressed her, but snapped himself out of it. This wasn’t the Liz he knew. For all he knew, this Liz was completely different from Future-Liz. I mean, after all, they were from different time lines, so he turned his attention back to his other self.

Zan scratched his scruffy jaw and plopped down into one of the booths. With his arm on the armrest, he said, “We gonna talk or what?”

“Who are you?” asked Max, following suit, sitting across from Zan.

“We’re you,” responded Lonnie, sitting in a booth behind Zan.

Isabel sat down next to her brother. “I don’t understand…”

“Maxwell, you can’t trust them. They’re shape-shifters!” yelled Michael, standing beside Maria to protect her from his look-alike.

“Oh, Maxwell, we can’t trust them. They’re evil, evil little aliens!” taunted Rath in a little girly voice, annoyed by their goody-two-shoe act.

Lonnie chuckled. “I know you must be buggin’ out right now, ‘cause I’d be buggin’ too.”

“How is this possible?” Alex asked, collapsing into one of the bar stools.

“I agree with Michael—they have to be shape-shifters,” responded Kyle, taking a seat next to Alex.

Zan sat up straighter, now resting his arms on the table. “We ain’t no shape-shifters.” Them—shape-shifters? They were god-damn royalty!

“You can’t seriously expect us to believe you’re the twins of our friends here,” said Kyle with disbelief.

Zan replied, “Believe it, Jock. There were eight pods originally. Four went here, da other four went to New York.”

“New York?” questioned Max.

Kyle pouted in the background, saying to mostly himself, “I’m not a jock… anymore.”

“The Big Apple. Center of the universe. Amazing pizza,” replied Rath. “Yo, I’m Rath.”

“Lonnie.”

“I’m Ava.”

“And I’m Zan.”

Max carefully observed them. He didn’t know whether to believe them or blast them into oblivion, but he couldn’t help but feel something inside him told him that they were telling the truth, that they weren’t shape-shifters. There was a connection between them, but he still didn’t know enough about them. For all he knew, they were the enmy.

“I’m Liz,” she said, breaking the somewhat uncomfortable moment. She knew Max well enough to see him debating whether to trust these people or not. Since she knew she could, trust them that is, she decided to take the first step. Perhaps the rest would follow.

Upon hearing Liz’s voice, Zan’s eyes snapped to the brunette. She was sitting on the bar stools next to the some tall lanky guy. He smiled at her bravery for introducing herself first. That was one thing she had in common with Future-Liz. He wondered what other qualities they shared. She gave a nervous wave at his direction.

“Hello,” she meekly said.

Zan watched as her body moved with her greeting. He took notice of how her breasts bounced slightly with her arm movement. He wanted to feel her soft body against his own. He wanted her underneath him. He wanted to be in her, inside her sweet, wet—. He shifted in his seat, trying to ignore the growing bulge forming in his leather pants.

“Liz!” hissed Maria. She couldn’t believe Liz was introducing herself so freely to these strangers! “We don’t even know if they’re good or not!”

“They’re harmless, Maria.”

“We don’t know that, Liz!”

Rath smirked at the blonde’s name. “Yeah, Maria, we’re harmless,” he said with a wink and a nod.

Maria eyed him weirdly, shuddered a little, and found safe haven behind Kyle who wasn’t feeling particularly happy about being the responsible person saving everyone else today. “Hey, stop that!” said Kyle only to sigh in defeat when Maria wrapped herself around his arm.

“Kyle, you’re my friend, so be my friend,” she said.

“Go to Michael!”

“But he’s going to blast them!” she said, pointing at Michael whose hands looked like they were flashlights.

“You gonna introduce yerselves or we gotta play a guessin’ game?” asked Lonnie with raised eyebrows.

Max pointed at the gang, introducing them. “That’s Michael, Isabel, Tess, and these are our friends: Alex, Kyle, Maria, and Liz.”

“Why are you here?” asked Michael, still very wary of them.

Zan turned his attention back to the pod squad. “We can’t really discuss why—“

“Why not?” asked an impatient Michael.

“If ya let him finish! God, you’s jus’ like Rath,” Lonnie said.

Rath pretended to look hurt. “Hey!”

“It’s true, baby,” winked Lonnie.

Zan elbowed his sister to stop her soon-to-grow banter with Rath. “Anyways, like I was sayin’, we can’t really discuss the details, but know dat we’s here to keep yer asses out of trouble.”

“Why do we need your help? You look like you get into plenty of trouble by yourselves,” said Maria.

“Baby, I’ll show ya trouble,” winked Rath, blowing a kiss to her.

Zan ignored Rath’s flirting with the blonde chick called Maria. He said, “There’s a war comin’ and we betta prepare for it. We’s stronger together than separated.”

“I don’t even know what the war’s about,” replied Max.

Zan answered, “We know it’s ‘bout us… da original royal four. Some kind of revolution happened, and they’s were all killed and sent to Earth to be reborn. Ever since then, da hood’s been a war zone. Like I said, together we’s stronger. Millions of lives hang in the balance or whatever.”

Time ticked away without a care. Liz had decided to not open the Crashdown in light of the new guests. Early morning had turned to late evening. The group fell into conversation with the dupes about their lives in New York—what it was like for them, when they realized they were different, if they had the same powers as the Roswell pod squad, and much more. They were all still suspicious of one another, but were slowly opening up. The dupes couldn’t help but wonder, “These are the people we’re supposed to be saving? What a disappointment!”

Alex pressed the button on the soda machine. “Should I do it? I’ll do it. No, wait, I shouldn’t. Umm… hey ladies, in my hands are two cokes. Do you want to get in on this?” rehearsed Alex. He shook his head. After psyching himself up for a more minutes, he walked over to the table with the two drinks. “Ladies, uh… frosty beverage?” he asked, holding up the cups.

Lonnie looked up from where she was picking at the bottom of her boots and saw the tall skinny kid, Alex. She smiled at his bashful look. He wasn’t her usual type, but he seemed… sweet? Plopping her foot down, she ran a finger down his skinny arm and pinched his ass cheek. “No three-ways tonight, opie. Maybe later,” she said with a wink. Isabel just blushed in horror.

Alex flustered, placed the drinks on the table, and went back over to Kyle who was currently eyeing Ava with great interest. To Kyle, Ava wasn’t like Tess. She was spunkier, cuter, and sexy whereas Tess was the pet dog that drooled after Max constantly. He watched as Ava twirled her hair around her finger while lazily smacking her gum while Tess was scowling at her—they weren’t getting along one bit.

Tess crossed her arms in front of her chest. “Favorite color?”

“Black,” replied Ava.

Tess waited. “Aren’t you going to ask me what’s mine?”

Ava flipped her hair and turned to the side, facing away from her twin. “I don’t care?”

Tess could only let out a scream of frustration.

“She’s cute,” Kyle said.

Alex’s eyebrows rose. “Who?”

“Ava,” he said, nodding his head over to the blonde-and-pink-haired girl.

“Dude! That’s Tess’s twin!” Alex replied with an elbow to Kyle’s side.

Kyle laughed and gave his friend a light shove. With a wink, he said, “Come on, as if you don’t want to get into Isabel’s and Lonnie’s pants.” Alex just remained silent with wide eyes, staring at the lovely ladies in front of him.

“So you and opie a thing?” asked Lonnie, letting her eyes wander to Alex.

Isabel began to cough after choking on her saliva in shock. “What?! No, no, no, noooo, we’re just friends, no, no, noooo,” she said, shaking her head.

“’cause tellin’ meh ‘no’ several times is gonna make me believe it,” said Lonnie, rolling her eyes.

Maria, herself, was trying not to look at Rath. He looked so much like Michael, minus the crazy hair and the tattoos. Sure, Rath was cute, but Michael was the only one for her. Still, she couldn’t shake the idea.

“I wonder what it would be like,” breathed out Maria.

“Like what?” Liz tilted her head in confusion.

“You know,” she said suggestively, “to be with Rath.”

“Maria!”

“I’m just wondering! No harm in that.”

Liz frowned at her best friend. Wasn’t Maria freaking out about Rath only moments ago? So Future-Liz had been right—Zan had come after all. She wondered how much he knew. Did he know about Future-Max coming here as well? What did Zan feel for her future self? Was Future-Liz special to him? Does he see her as Future-Liz or as someone separate?

“So where are you guys staying tonight?” she asked the dupes.

Ava shrugged her shoulders. “Dunno. In da van? We don’t got much cash on us.”

“My parents are out of town. You guys can stay here for a while.”

“No, Liz,” replied Max. “No offense to you all, but Liz, I don’t trust leaving them alone with you.”

Rath just shrugged. “None taken, Duke.”

“Don’t worry, Max,” said Zan. “I’ll take good care of her.” Max glared at him.

“Liz, are you crazy?” hissed Maria. That’s it—Maria knew her best friend had gone crazy. She was sure of it, but Liz brushed it off, saying it was alright.

“Do you want me to stay with you? Or Alex? Kyle even!”

Liz smiled. “No, I’ll be fine. Don’t worry.” She then turned her attention over to Zan who had walked up to her during the conversation. She tried not to gasp. Throughout the whole day, she had only seen him from afar, but now seeing him up close, really up close… He really did remind her of Future-Max with the leather outfit. They both had this tortured depressed look, all the while looking as confidentially sexy as possible. She tried to ignore the desire to run her fingers across his tattoos, seeing if they felt different from his own natural skin. She mentally kicked herself when she wondered if he had any tattoos hidden from her and how much she would like to find out where they were. She and Future-Liz was right: anything that resembled Max Evans is on their to-do list, literally.

“So how did ya know mah name?” asked Zan who could feel Max’s stare that sent daggers at his back.

Liz looked over at her best friend and then to Zan. “I don’t know what you mean,” she said, cursing at herself on the inside for saying his name earlier. To play coy, she replied, “How did you know my name?”

His eyes studied her. “You’s knew I was comin’,” he stated.

“Don’t be ridiculous. There’s no way Liz would know you guys were coming,” said Maria, laughing. Then there was silence. She saw the two staring at each other as if nothing else had existed in the room. “Liz? I am right, right Liz?”

“Alright, it’s getting late and I best be going home,” announced Alex.

“Yeah, me too. I gotta get home to—WOAH!” exclaimed Kyle.

Even though Zan knew this wasn’t his Liz, he couldn’t stop himself. Just seeing her so close to him, he couldn’t think correctly. She was real. She was there, standing right in front of him. She was alive, breathing and beating. She was just as innocent and if possible, more beautiful. He couldn’t help but stare at her lips that seemed to beg for him to nibble on them. When Future-Liz was with him, he claimed her without her asking. He just took her whenever he felt like it and she never complained. To be restricted now was torture. How could one go from pleasing himself with his angel only to be held back? Once he caught a whiff of her vanilla scent, one he was so familiar with, he knew he couldn’t control himself. With a yelp from Liz, he took her into his strong arms and planted a kiss on the lips he had been missing.

Yes, pandemonium—that’s what it was.

To be continued.

[kyliemou]

If my feedbackers were cookies, they'd be delicious! *nom, nom, nom, nom*: forever dreamer, jake17, kay_b, lizandzackfan (x2), paper, Egyptian_Kiss, garcia88, roswell3053, dreamsatnight, and KiaraAlexisKlay.

Q&A:

I love that the dupes don't like the gerbil...absolutely classic!!! And the groups reaction to the dupes...I'm so conflicted with Max. I was swooning when he was protecting Liz when they didn't know who they were, and then I was just wishing everyone would leave so they can have all the hot alien lovin' (I mean Liz and Zan btw) and then BAM! at the end we get a kiss!!! In front of everyone!!! Brilliant!! I'm rooting for a Zan and Liz pairing now...maybe with a lil bit of Max...
Anyway, so they have to have realised by now that Liz knows why they're there and who has sent them. How will they react to what she did to herself? Ooh can't see that going down well...not at all considering he's already lost one Liz. And the baby!! Forgot the baby...why didn't anyone at the hospital mention the baby? That just occured to me in bed the other night...see how much I like this fic!!!

Hi Rach, thank you! You’re great! Well, I obviously can’t give any love to the gerbil. It’s rare that a fic will make me like her, but I refuse to write her in a good light at the moment. YAY, be torn between Zan and Max. That’s the effect I was going for! =P
Actually they don’t know that Liz knows yet. It was just a whisper of Zan’s name.
No one in the hospital knows she’s pregnant. I technically made her pregnant after all the testing has been done, because just before she woke up, Future-Liz gave her the child.

OH I just love Zan!! Freakin takes her in front of everyone... claim your Liz Zan claim her!! Damn even his thoughts make me hot!

Carrie, it’s so like Zan to take what he wants, right? =P I mean, come on, look at your fic. He just takes Liz whenever and wherever he wants. Man, Zan, take me now! XD Oh, I’m done with my finals so now I’m free to write chapters as much as I can. YAY!

Now I understand why you had to change it to 15A cause this chapter definitely isn't over. You have to come back here and post NOW!

Exactly. I was re-reading the chapter and felt I couldn’t just end it there. I had to continue the last scene. Oh, oh, Kay, hard question: Zan or Jason? ::twisted::!!!!

Poor Zan. He just couldn't help himself! Certainly, there will be flashes. Hope someone doesn't backhand him while he tries to figure out what they mean. Liz is carrying his child, so he'll probably think that makes her his to do with as he pleases.

Sadly, no flashes.

Is he gonna find out about her trying to kill herself soon? Jw. Cause when Micheal had said that he could see the bandages,etc. They will see them too right?

You know, I honestly forgot that I wrote that Michael could see her bandages! Thanks for reminding me!

i've been reading this off and on, i think i need to go back and re-read cause i must have missed something. how did liz get pregnant with zan's baby??
i love the interaction between the new yorkers and the roswellians! so funny with kyle alex and maria checking out the dupes... hahhaa

If you haven’t re-read it yet: Future-Liz slept with Zan thus getting pregnant, but she disappeared from the present time. Liz tried to kill herself, but was saved by Max and then later was brought to the hospital. While Liz was “recuperating,” she was trapped in her mind where she had to work out things for herself. Then she met Future-Liz in her mind and because Liz had a chance to going back, Future-Liz transferred her baby to Liz thus Liz is now pregnant with Zan’s baby (who the real mother is Future-Liz).

I'm glad you liked my version of Liz Matches The Mt. St. Helens Eruption, lol. If you want, you are more than welcome to use any quotes or ideas that little blurb ticked off in your brain.
Okay....first off I loved how you describe the Royal Dupes coming in the Crashdown. It was kind of funny and I'm sorry, but I was laughing at that quote where it was describing their hair blowing like a model on a catwalk's.
Secondly, I love everybodies reactions. Even though I didn't imagine it that way in my mind when I thought of the big meeting, it was perfect and something I could truly see happening on the show. And can I say, your Ava rocks! I think it's hilarious that Ava took an instant dislike to Tess!
Rath being Rath and flirting with Maria *shakes head* that is too...Epic! Am I detecting a little streetwalker in you, Ky? But the twelve of them spending a tense day trying to 'get to know' the other group was kind of funny.
I can't remember if FLiz ever told Zan that FMax had gone to visit her younger self or not...or if maybe Da Man received something in a flash when he and FLiz got it on?

K, you are too much! I’ll have to go back and see what you wrote, and if I do decide to use it, you will get enormous credit for it.
You know what happened? I think I watched too many Japanese dramas and their idea of comedy is getting to me. I could totally picture the Royal Dupes walking with such confident that many would assume they were famous or models. It’s also a stark contrast between them and the Roswell Group who are kind of plain-Jane and unnoticeable if need be. I think you’ll see a little “asian” comedy in this chapter too.
How did you imagine everyone’s reactions to the Dupes?
I obviously adore Ava more than I even remotely like Tess. Ava will be much loved in this story. Also, when Tess first came along, who actually liked her? It wasn’t until somewhat later we enjoyed her and then the whole Alex thing just killed it.
I may have an inner streetwalker in me. Who knows. =P I’m playing with the Dupes and the Roswell Gang right now like a puzzle, trying to see what works and what doesn’t.
I don’t think I had Future-Liz tell Zan that Future-Max came back to their time. I actually have to re-read my own story right now. *goes off to read it* Nope, she never told him. She only told him what she saw in her vision.










Author’s Note: All spelling errors are deliberate in this chapter.
The real author’s note is placed at the end of this chapter this time. This is done because it is spoiler-rish to this chapter.

Here’s a recap for those who are getting confused with the events:
- Future-Max travelled to the past to get Max to fall out of love with Liz.
- He sleeps with Liz and disappears the next morning.
- Liz has a breakdown and tries to kill herself. During this time, she is in her dream realm/mind, trying to figure things out. After much anguishing torture, she realizes that most of her feelings are a mixture of her own and Future-Max’s who had also tried to kill himself.
- It is in this realm that she meets Future-Liz who tells her that the Dupes are coming.
- Future-Liz knows she can’t go back (that she will cease to exist) so she transfers the baby that she and Zan created in Liz.
- Last two chapters (Chapter 14 and 15A): The dupes came and are introduced. Zan kisses Liz.





Oh, oh, OH! “Adia” won Fanfic of the Month (May) at A Roswellian's Fantasy Convention board! YAY!
AWARD BANNER HERE






Chapter Fifteen – Part B:

One night to be confused,
one night to speed up truth.
We had a promise made,
four hands and then away.

Both under influence,
we had divine scent
to know what to say.
Mind is a razor blade.

To call for hands of above,
to lean on,
wouldn't be good enough
for me, no.

One night of magic rush,
the start a simple touch.
One night to push and scream
and then relief.

Ten days of perfect tunes,
the colors red and blue.
We had a promise made.
We were in love.

To call for hands of above,
to lean on,
wouldn't be good enough
for me, no.

To call for hands of above,
to lean on,
wouldn't be good enough.

And you, you knew the hands of the devil.
And you kept us awake with wolf teeth.
Sharing different heartbeats
in one night.

To call for hands of above,
to lean on,
wouldn't be good enough
for me, no.
“Heartbeats,” Jose Gonzalez.

December 18, 2000, Monday; Roswell, New Mexico:

It took her by surprise. She was just standing there and they were talking. Then all of the sudden, he… She was… Liz blinked when she felt his large hand against her cheek. His warm lips were pressed against her tightly-shut ones. She could see his closed eyes, the long dark lashes resting against his tanned skin, and as much as she wanted to close hers, the shock overwhelmed her. Her eyes just remained frozen open as her mind halted her from thinking. She could feel his breath tingle her upper lip. The coarse unshaven beard scratched against her smooth jaw. Her lips were tightly pressed together, but she could’ve sworn she tasted a hint of cinnamon and menthol. She came to believe this was a very uniquely Zan taste.

She eyed the black metal cuffs on his wrists, the chipped black nail polish on his fingernails, the dark eyeliner that coated his eyelids, his scruffy beard, and his gelled spiky hair. The smell of leather from his vest and pants overwhelmed her. He was a total punker and she shivered at this notion. Her hand slowly reached up to place its self on his chiseled arm to balance herself from the force of his lips, but she stopped herself. What would happen if she were to touch him? What would his skin feel like on hers? All her blood rushed upwards, filling her cheeks with such color that it would put pomegranates to shame.

Perhaps it was the blood that was coursing through her face that blocked out all the sounds. She heard a soft sigh emit from Zan that was almost blocked out by his heavy breathing. Then as if someone had turned off the mute button, all she could hear were the shrieks in the café. Her eyebrows shot up to her hairline. She had been so shocked by the action, by the kiss, that she had forgotten there were other people in the room.

“WOAH, WOAH, WOAH!” cried both Alex and Kyle who chose to point at the pair repeatedly as if to accuse them.

“Liz is kissing Zan!” cried Alex.

“Zan is kissing Liz!” yelled Kyle.

Liz blinked slowly, afraid to move. She was too afraid to move. Her body felt numb and she couldn’t bring herself to pull away. He held her to him; his hand forcing their close proximity. Here was Zan kissing her in front of everyone. In front of everyone! It was as if someone picked her up and threw her on the set of Valley Girl, except Zan was much sexier than a young punked-out Nicholas Cage. She stood awkwardly, pressing against the counters. Her hands were in the air as if she was about to being arrested, just an inch away from touching Zan, but she could feel the heat from his body. Her eyes flickered over to her friends and rested on Max who looked like he was ready to explode. No, he had already exploded.

Zan was oblivious to everything. Within his reach was Liz Parker and her lips were on his. She was sweet, ripe, and his for the taking, but she was stiff in his presence. Future-Liz was never stiff; she was always very responsive, very wanton-like. He opened his eyes to find himself staring into her frightened ones. Liz, why are you scared, he thought, we’ve done this before. What’s with the— He then mentally kicked himself. This wasn’t Future-Liz. It was Liz as in present-Liz. He had known this fact yet he still kissed her. He blinked rapidly as realization set in and then he moved away from her, already missing the feel of her skin against his palm. Shit, he cursed himself, Fuck. What do I say now? That I’m sorry that I practically attacked her? That I momentarily got confused, mixing her with her future-self? Fuck.

Ava buried her face into her hands. She thought, Zan, ya fuck-up. What am I gonna do wit’ ya?

Rath groaned and turned around, hissing profanities to himself. He thought, Damnit, duke! That ain’t fucking her!

Lonnie’s eyebrows just rose up in question. She thought, I have an idiot for a bro.

How was Zan going to get himself out of this? He saw Max practically steaming on the corner of his eyes. This was not a good beginning to making friends. He ran his fingers through his gelled hair and burst out in laughter, even if it was an awkward forced laugh.

“Hahahahaha!” he belted out. When he saw everyone still giving him weird looks, he continued. “Hah… hahahaha!” Who ya tryin’ to convince, boy, he thought.

The kiss took Max by surprise as well. He thought they were just chit-chatting (yes, he was watching them) and before he knew it, his twin was mauling her. He resisted himself long enough. He sat down long enough before automatically jumping up. First, this trash tried to get his hands on her and then he forces himself on his precious Liz? Yeah, you’re going down, motherfucker, he thought.

“YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!” screamed Max as he tried to throw himself at his doppelganger. Kyle quickly restrained him, but he feared more for his life than for Zan’s. Max, of course, was an alien and Kyle was just a human. Who knows what Max could’ve done to Kyle or to his precious fit body.

Automatically stepping up, Zan let his words get the best of him because that’s who he was. He would never let someone get away with the last word and he was, of course, quite snarky most of the time. “Calm down, dukey dos. I jus’ gettin’ da lay of da land.” As soon as those words left his lips, he could practically feel Ava in his head giving him a beat-down. He knew Rath was ready to strangle him and Lonnie was just rolling her eyes at him.

“A lay of the—I’M GOING TO KILL YOU!” yelled Max. At this point, Kyle was at a forty-five degree angle, using his feet to keep Max from going anywhere.

Michael let out a breathy growl. Liz was practically his sister and this… this evil clone of Max’s forced himself on her! He was the second in command; it’s his job to protect his loved ones. Yes, it was his time to protect Liz. “NO, MAX, I’LL KILL HIM FOR YOU!” shouted Michael.

“No, no, no!” quickly said Alex who ended up in the same degree angle as Kyle as he prevented Michael from reaching the dupe. Despite his lanky appearance, Alex did have quite a good amount of muscle on him.

“Come on, like ya wouldn’t do wha’ I did jus’ now… Ya don’t mind, eh, angel? I jus’ gettin’ a lil welcome, dat’s all,” he said, addressing Liz with a wink.

Liz blushed furiously, more than just previously from the kiss. She never had someone speak to her that way. His language was crude, his actions animalistic, his manners uncouth, but it all intrigued her. Where Max was kind, thoughtful, and a gentleman who never took advantage of her, Zan was a stark contrast. She looked away to find Maria smirking in her direction. Isabel just stood there, stunned and Tess… she looked damned proud as if things were working out in her favor (Liz figured they kind of were).

“Nothin’ to git worked up ‘bout. Jus’ a kiss. Nothin’ special. Ya guys act like you’s all Marys,” said Zan.

Nothing special? Is he really telling me that kiss was for nothing, questioned Liz. Her stunned face quickly turned into a scowl. All her previous thoughts of how sexy he was flew out of the window. He was the one that kissed her and he was saying it was nothing special? She could feel rage build up inside of her.

“Valenti, let go of me!” shouted Max to Kyle.

“Whitman, if you don’t get off of me, I’m going to explode your bits to smithereens!” yelled Michael.

Alex and Kyle stepped away with a “Yahhh!” noise, afraid of what they might do to them. As much as they cared for their friends and wanted to stop a bloodbath, they cared more for their bodies, more namely their privates. They quickly huddled to a corner, their legs slightly clenched together and bent at the knees.

“You stay the fuck away from her!” Max growled to his twin. Instead of once again charging towards Zan to break his face in, he took Liz’s hand and forcefully led her to the backroom of the café.

Maria bounced over to Alex and Kyle. Isabel sat down, forcing Michael to sit next to her. Tess scowled at the sight of Max and Liz disappearing behind the Employees Only door. Ava and Lonnie shared a look and sighed.

Rath appeared behind Zan, placing his hand on his friend’s shoulder. “You’re an idiot,” he said.

Zan watched as an angry Liz was being led away from him by his double. He pissed her off; he knew that because he did it on purpose. She wasn’t Future-Liz, his Liz. She was someone else and he had made the mistake of confusing them both. I’m sorry, angel. I thinks dis is for da best, he thought.

“I know,” he breathed out in response to Rath.

- - - -

Once the door swung close, Max quickly ran his hand all over Liz, making sure she wasn’t hurt in any other way besides being forcefully kissed. Liz smiled at his concern. To be honest, at first, she didn’t really mind so much that Zan kissed her, but then she was in rage that he planted one on her without permission and played it off as nothing. Who does that, she wondered.

He took her in his arms, satisfied that she was there before him and not by his twin. “Are you alright, Liz?” he asked, still running his hands up and down her arm as if he was in doubt of his own checking of her body.

She bit her lower lip and stopped him by placing her hand over his. “I’m fine,” she said.

“You sure? Because I can check with my pow—“

“Max, stop. I’m fine. I’m not bleeding or hurt or anything.”

“But are you—“

“Stop,” she said with a small laugh. “I’m okay.”

Max sighed in relief, glad she was alright. He had always been protective of Liz; that came naturally to him as if it was programmed in him since birth. Especially with the recent events, he had to be more cautious. He wasn’t going to let her slip out of his hands that easily. He was going to keep her safe.

Realizing the state they were in—her hands over his, their body in very close proximity of each other—Max stepped back. Liz frowned at this. It was as if someone had flicked on the light bulb and all the past came rushing to haunt them. Liz slept with two men. Liz tried to kill herself. Liz wasn’t who he thought she was. He stepped away and rubbed his hand against his stomach as if he was trying to get rid of her germs, but really it was done out of uncertainty. He didn’t even finish processing her past actions, but now with this kiss… He knew it wasn’t her fault, but it seemed as if the world was striving to hurt him, to taunt him, to break him. Understanding she was fine, he nodded and went back to the front of the café. He didn’t want to be near her… not yet.

Liz sighed, plopping herself down on the sofa. She knew why he left. She didn’t even have to think about it anymore. It was a moment where everything was forgotten, a moment where they seemed good again—it was a false moment. Silently, she cursed Zan. Who gave him the right to just kiss her like that? Who said she wanted to be kissed for no reason? In the end, she was utterly confused by everything. She let out a small scream of frustration. Annoyed, she scratched at the gauze. Her skin was healing, but it felt like there were ten mosquitoes trapped underneath. She wondered if the dupes had seen the gauze wrapped around her wrists. Probably not, she thought, They were probably too busy introducing themselves… Oh, and let’s not forget Zan and his King Kong act. After a moment later, she rolled her sleeves down, covering the wounds, and went back outside to face the music.

To be continued.


Author’s Note: Hmm, a lot of you raised interesting points and questions. I think it’s best to answer some of them here in the author’s note because some of you might be wondering the same thing and I think it’s best to get it out of the open.

In the hospital, Future-Liz transferred the baby just when Liz woke up. Later, Liz left the hospital so this means the medical testings were done BEFORE the pregnancy. This is why no one knows Liz is pregnant yet.

After reading this chapter, you will realize that Liz has not told the dupes about her knowing Future-Liz yet. Seeing that she couldn’t tell anyone about Future-Max, she’s not saying a word about Future-Liz because she doesn’t know how much she could change. This means she’s not revealing her pregnancy to anyone yet because it could change so many things. But of course, eventually the truth has to come out and this will be addressed in later chapters. ;P

[kyliemou]

I like knowing I'm not writing for myself. Thanks to: roswellian love, jake17, kay_b, lizandzackfan, Egyptian_Kiss, roswell3053, forever dreamer, and XYZ.

Poor Zan
liz just irritated the helll outta me I mean if I had a sex god kissing me i'ma kissed right back
max i can't stand

EEEEEK! I’m scared now because I love Max. Hahahaha. As much as I understand how Awakened Dreamer fans would absolutely 100 percent kiss Zan back, I do think if, in real life, we were to meet him for the very first time as a stranger (and not as the Zan we know on the show and through fanfic), we’d be frozen too if he kissed us. First, it would be shock because a stranger is kissing us. Second, we would be so traumatized in a good way because Zan is kissing us. XD

CONGRADULATIONS KYLIE!!! SO HAPPY FOR YOU!
loved the chapter of course! the whole interaction between the dupes is hysterical ... perfect!
great job as always!

Thanks Carrie! I didn’t even know I won till I checked my inbox on that thread yesterday. XD I’m about two months late in picking up the award. Gosh, I suck. Feel better, honey! I hope you’re able to post soon.

Congrats on the award!
Awesome part. See, Zan kissing Liz painted a much better picture than when Rath did it in school. Now as for Zan's reaction, it was understandable. He just went through losing the woman he loved, and he held her just as she literally disappeared right before his very eyes. So despite being told that it was a different version of Liz, his mind and heart were just relishing the fact that Liz whether it was the present or future one, was merely a kiss away. So yeah, that was exactly what he did.
And between Jason and Zan, I know I already told you the answer but I'll say it again, "JASON!!!"

Thank you, Kay! I could understand how Rath could kiss Liz, but ehhh. Not in my fic! XD And you hit it right on the dot with Zan. Also, if I had to pick, I’d pick Jason too. =P

Ugh you can't leave it there! Come Back! I see where you put that she hid her cuts...So when are they going to find out she tried to kill herself? I'm just curiousy because if Zan cares for her then he would probably have a heart attack right?

Thank you for bringing up the wound. I know I thanked you in the last post, but seriously… Thanks! Even writers tend to forget or overlook something they wrote. The more I write for this story, the more I fear I will slip up.

Loved this! The reactions were highly realistic. If i hadn't had a hard couple of days I'd be leaving you a smorgous board of compliments and thought provoking insight...but I have had a hard couple of days *sighs exhausted*. Update soon.

EK, it’s okay. It’s more important to me to know that my readers are doing well both physically and emotionally in RL. Real Life > Comments on story. Is everything alright? *hugs*

Wow, what a great part!!
I'm hoping you go double-dipper with this so I don't have to choose between them!! Plus it will annoy the gerbil sooo much!!!! I want them both to be with Liz, its so obvious they both love her and I think she loves/or will love them both too, and if she doesn't, I'd seriously worry bout her sanity!!!
Thank you for clearing it up about the baby! Makes so much sense now.

Rach, your welcome. Your question about the baby was a good one and I’m pretty sure most of my readers thought the same too.

I can’t believe it! Two chapters! Damn, I am behind with my feedback.
You are right; I am running out of words to describe your incredible story, but don’t worry, if English is not enough I can change languages.
I just say, that your updates where great again. I just love to read your story. In my opinion you write very realistic. The way you write and guide the story is very believable.
Zan seems to have a very hard time, which is very understandable. I wonder how he will react, when he finds out, that Liz tried to kill herself. If I remember right, he doesn’t suspect anything jet.
Alex and Kyle are funny.
PS: Congratulations for your award! You deserve it!

J, thank youuuuuuuuu! If you switch over to another language, I might be tempted to write this entire story in phonetic Chinese (ex: Zan high ho lan jigh = Zan is a very pretty boy). XD Let's keep it in the language we all understand, k? Hahaha!=P I try to keep my story realistic because that's who I am: superbly realistic. But then when I go to sleep, it's all Jason/Max/Zan on clouds with me.










Rating: ADULT.
Author’s Note: I’m having such a hard time with this chapter and the next upcoming chapter. It doesn’t help that I finished writing them and MicrosoftWord decide to glitch on me. -_-* I lost most of my new editing and had to do it all over again from memory, and I’m sure I missed a lot of great lines too. *sighs* If all goes well, expect a new chapter by Saturday! Enjoy??

All spelling errors are deliberate.






Chapter Sixteen:

God that was strange to see you again.
Introduced by a friend of a friend,
smiled and said 'yes I think we've met before.'
In that instant it started to pour,
captured a taxi despite all the rain.
We drove in silence across Pont Champlain
and all of the time you thought I was sad,
I was trying to remember your name...

This scar is a fleck on my porcelain skin,
tried to reach deep but you couldn't get in.
Now you're outside me.
You see all the beauty.
Repent all your sin.

It's nothing but time and a face that you lose.
I chose to feel it and you couldn't choose.
I'll write you a postcard.
I'll send you the news.
From a house down the road, from real love...

Live through this, and you won't look back...
Live through this, and you won't look back...
Live through this, and you won't look back...

There's one thing I want to say, so I'll be brave.
You were what I wanted.
I gave what I gave.
I'm not sorry I met you.
I'm not sorry it's over.
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save.

I'm not sorry there's nothing to save...
“Your Ex-Lover Is Dead,” Stars.

December 18, 2000, Monday; Roswell, New Mexico:

It was hard, but Liz managed to convince Max to go home and that it was alright if the dupes were staying at her place. Uneasy about the whole situation, Max trusted Liz enough to judge people. He was still in rage about Zan kissing her. How would anyone feel if he saw the love of his life being kissed by someone else? He would act exactly like Max had… with rage and out for blood.

The situation ended just as fast as it happened. It all took place in one conversation. Zan’s lips were on hers. He pulled back. Liz was stunned. Alex and Kyle stopped Max from punching his lights out. The dupes cursed at their stupid brother. That was it.

“You stay away from her,” said Max, still on the edge of his emotions. He was ready to fight. His entire body screamed for a beating, for his arms to swing out, but he held himself back. His control was ready to snap, but he refused to lose his cool in front of this trash. Instead, he chose to grip onto the counter, exerting whatever anger was coursing through his body into the slab.

“Ya can’t tell meh what to do. I ain’t one of yer subjects,” replied Zan. “I do whatever I want.”

“If I find out that you do anything against her will or hurt her in any way, I’ll hunt you down,” growled Max. It was bad enough he had to leave Liz alone with these dupes because he wouldn’t be able to protect her from them. Damn, Liz, why are you so trustful of others, thought Max.

Zan scoffed and smirked. “Trust meh, whatever I do, she’ll want.”

Any harder with his grip, Max would’ve broken off a piece of the counter. He tried to keep his powers under control when he saw the lights flickering. He could feel the hair on the back of his neck rise up. This guy… This guy didn’t apologize for what he had done. Instead, this asshole thought it was okay for him to do whatever he wanted. He acted like Liz was his property and Max hated his arrogant character. “You fucking ass—“

“Look, look, it’ll be fine, okay, duke?” said Ava who, in the end, was forced to step in as peace maker. “I’ll watch her. Nothin’ gonna happen to her.”

“See that it doesn’t,” said Max before forcing himself walking out of the Crashdown.

“Yer a fuckin’ douchebag, Zan. Why would ya provoke him? You know betta,” yelled Ava. She had enough with his cocky attitude. It was fine the other times, but this was unlike those times. This was a different situation. They needed to be on the good side of their twins. They needed to work together, not be split apart.

“I jus’ don’t like him. He thinks he’s all that,” replied Zan.

Ava sighed. “But Zan, ya think ya all that too.”

Zan twitched, knowing she had a point. Ava always had a point and he hated that. “I need a smoke,” he said, heading out the café.

“I thought you quit,” she replied.

“I hide it well,” he said, not even turning around, and was off.

It hadn’t been a smart move for him to kiss Liz, seeing as how he had just met the Roswell gang. They were still unsure of whether he and his family were the enemy, and to do such a bold move at a time like that was not intelligent at all, but he didn’t regret it either. It was the best feeling he had in hours since Future-Liz’s vanishing. Her lips brought him home. In the few seconds she was in his arms, he travelled back to New York, back to his dirty home where he shared many loving moments with his Liz. Sure, he felt guilty. He knew she wasn’t the same person, but he couldn’t control himself… Not when it came to Liz Parker. Was it her tiny button nose? Her dark brown eyes? Her silky long hair? Her pale freckled skin? Her scent? Her petite frame? He didn’t know, but there was something about Liz Parker and he couldn’t stay away. She was like a drug—something both bad and good for him, and totally addictive.

He stepped into a convenience store, bought a packet of cigarettes, and growled when the cashier stared at him as if he was some kind of freak. “Ya got a prob, buddy? I fuckin’ smash yer face if ya keep lookin’ at meh dat way,” he said. The guy stuttered and looked away, choosing to head into the back room to hide. Zan let out a frustrated growl, shaking his head. This fucking town, I swear, he thought. He found a wooden bench, stepped on top of the seat, and sat down on ledge of the backing. Placing the flimsy white stick on his lips, he cupped his hands together and lit it up with his powers. The smoke swirled inside his mouth and down into his lungs, only to be blown out.

Flashback: Her body was warm against his, perhaps too warm, but he needed to hold her. His skin screamed for hers. He pressed his body down on hers, satisfied that her breasts were flattened against his chest. He felt her sink deeper into the bed with his weight. “I’m not him.”
Future-Liz’s arms came around his shoulders and she whispered into his neck, “No, you’re not. You’re Zan.”
He was satisfied with that. She was there with him and not his twin. She was his in this moment.

“I miss you,” he said out loud, hoping that Future-Liz, wherever she was, would hear him. He flicked the cigarette, watching the ash fall and disappear into the night. “I’ve only known ya for two weeks and somehow ya wormed yerself into mah… No one’s ever done dat. God, what did ya do to meh? I can’t get ya out of mah head. Yer there constantly. I see yer face every time I blink. I can’t not see ya.”

Flashback: “Don’t,” she pleaded with him, closing her eyes.
“Angel, look at me,” he said as he gazed down on her. His body trapped her against the wall.
“I can’t,” she meekly replied.
“Please, Liz, look at me,” he asked of her. Her dark eyes challenged him as her eyelids creased upwards. He smirked at her courage. She was petite, but she had such fire in her eyes.
“Zan,” she breathed out as his fingers grazed the revealed cleavage of her breasts. Her pink tongue snaked out and licked his lower lips. Take me, her eyes seemed to say.

He sighed, breathing in the ashy smoke. Who was he talking to? Of course she couldn’t hear him. He was talking to no one yet he wanted to keep talking. “Now I’m here in Roswell. I’m doin’ yer biddin’ and yer not here to share this moment wit’ meh. I’m gonna be sappy now and we both know it ain’t like meh. The moon’s bright tonight and I wish ya were here sittin’ next to meh. I know you well enough—ya prob wanted to jus’ go home for one last time and ya didn’t even get a chance to see home. God, I hope wherever ya are, yer okay ‘cause I’m not.”

Was he feeling guilty he never had the chance to say all that he wanted to say? That he allowed himself to carry on his arrogant self and not expressing his true feelings more? Was he finally breaking down? “I love ya, I hope ya know dat. But when I see her, younga you, I dunno wha’ to do, wha’ to feel. She looks so much like ya and I know she ain’t you, but I can’t control myself ‘round ‘er.”

He knew Future-Liz was gone. She was no longer living. In other words, she was dead. She didn’t leave behind a body. She left no traces of herself in this world. It was as if she never existed, as if he had made her up. It was a possibility that Future-Liz was a figment of his imagination. There was a great chance that he had been so desperate that he conjured her up. He had been looking for a reason to go on living, to find out why he was placed here, and then she came along as if his prayers had been answered.

He had her several times. He had been inside of her yet it felt like he didn’t even remember what it felt like. It was as if it never happened. All he could remember was shaking and smiling in her arms.

Flashback: Her wet walls drowned his organ with her musky scent. She was so beautiful, so perfect. She was absolutely his. He thrust against her, slipping himself back inside of her. A mew escaped from her lips. Her body clenched around his penis as he watched himself disappear inside her body. His hand trailed up from her calf which he had been holding to discover her nub that was hidden away between her folds. His thumb placed pressure against her clit and softly began to rub it. Her cries grew louder as her nails met with his shoulder. She was so close, he was so close. Her body stiffened against his. His arms created a barrier around her face while his hips violently smacked against hers. “Come for me, baby. Come on my fucking cock,” he growled into her ear. Then she arched against him, yelling as she went into paradise.

By the time he walked back to the café, he found Rath sleeping on the couch with the girls nowhere in sight. He eyed the empty space next to his friend and sighed. The girls were probably upstairs sleeping together because that was the rule: girls with girls and boys with boys. He sat on the empty side of the pull-out bed and pulled his shoes off noisily, not caring if he woke up his second-in-command. Rath just grumbled and turned on his side, facing away from him. Zan took off his vest, throwing it to the top ledge of the couch. He laid down in his wife beater and leather pants, feeling uncomfortable already since he was used to sleeping in only his boxers. This sucks, he thought. He looked up the stairs, lost in thought. I wonder what she wears to bed. Does she wear a nightie or a simple t-shirt and PJ pants, he wondered. He folded his arms behind his head and tore his eyes away from the stairs.

Rath grumbled once again and turned over to Zan. His leg found its way on top of Zan’s and his arm fell over his friend’s chest. Unknown to others due to his appearance, Rath was actually a cuddler, but he always slept alone with an extra pillow so no one ever experienced it. Zan made a distasteful face and gave his friend a look of sheer shock. Rath began to pull himself closer towards Zan’s body, only unconsciously knowing to seek out warmth. Zan quickly took the pillow behind his head and shoved it in between them, horrified that his friend was trying to cuddle with him. Rath’s arms came around the pillow and he sighed dreamily when he felt content of a pressure against his body. Zan muttered a curse. Yeah, this sucks, he thought.

That night, Zan and Rath had slept on the couch downstairs while Lonnie and Ava slept in her bed. Liz had fallen asleep on her lawn chair unintentionally while gazing up at the stars and when the girls saw this, they decided to just take the bed. But before, earlier in the day after the kiss, she had avoided Zan. She didn’t want a repeat nor did she want to anger Max any further. She ignored his stares that seemed to burn into her skin. Whenever she caught him, he wouldn’t turn away. He’d only gaze at her harder as if to say “I’m looking at you. See me look at you.” It unnerved her. It enraged her. It confused her.

- - - -

December 19, 2000, Tuesday; Roswell, New Mexico:

By next morning, Liz had woken up to an aching back. She slipped past the sleeping bodies of the girls and heard the clanging of metal coming from downstairs. Lightly stepping down the stairs, she walked past a still-sleeping Rath who was strangling a pillow in his arms and found Zan cooking in the kitchen. Her somewhat good mood was replaced with bitterness. “Good morning,” she said, startling him. Zan broke out of his trance of stirring the eggs in the large metal bowl. He nodded towards her and continued to stir, ignoring how good she looked even in her pajamas—she was wearing a white long-sleeve thermal shirt decorated with hearts and pink shorts that barely covered her ass. He got his answer of what she wore to bed. She was so short, so tiny that his arms could go around her waist twice, and her breasts disappeared underneath her clothes. She looked like a child, but he would still choose her over any other woman in the universe.

She sat on a bar stool, watching him. She was half-glaring and half-watching at him by this point for all the memories of his King Kong act came rushing back to her as her brain started to wake up. “Making omelets?” she asked. She was mad, but she wasn’t going to ignore him. That wasn’t her character.

Zan paused for a moment, shocked to find her willing to speak to him. She didn’t fear him like that Maria girl was. Liz was mad at him, he knew that, yet she was still making conversation. She was unlike any other girl he had ever met, besides Future-Liz. “You made ‘em for meh,” he said softly as if he meant to say it to himself but Liz heard. He remembered their second day together in New York. He had came out of the shower to find Future-Liz making breakfast for the group. It was a sight that still tugged at his heart. He remembered drying her hair, touching her, smelling her… “Your omelet is burning,” he growled into Future-Liz’s ear. It was only just yesterday he had last held her. God, it was just yesterday, he anguishly thought.

“I did?” Liz questioned, scrunching up her forehead in confusion.

Crap, he thought, she doesn’t know about her future self. Quickly thinking of an excuse, he said, “I mean, I made them before. Not you, but—“

She nodded and cut him off. “Future-Liz,” she said, not realizing she said something she wasn’t supposed to.

He almost dropped the bowl and whirled around to face her. She knew. She knew, he thought. Eggs be damned! “How did ya—There’s no way ya coulda’ve known ‘bout her. How did ya know ‘bout her?” He walked up to her with alarm on his face. The look on his face—he was staring at her as if she was the enemy.

Damn, she thought. It was still early and apparently her brain was still cloudy from sleep; this was why she slipped up. How was it that she slipped up so easily about Future-Liz with Zan and not Future-Max with Max? Perhaps she was already too full with secrets that it was all spilling over now. Liz wondered if she should tell him. Future-Liz never said anything about not telling Zan that she knew about her. It was only Future-Max who asked her not to reveal him to Max. How much harm could it cause if she told Zan? But what if the end of the world still came because she told him? She pushed a piece of her hair behind her ear and bit her lower lip in nervousness. She thought, But I’m pregnant with his child. He’s going to know eventually. Future-Max was so adamant on the group not finding out about him, about the end of the world, but Future-Liz never said a word. Oh god, what am I going to do?

“She came to me… when I was unconscious.” There, she did it. She told him. Would she regret it? It was too early to tell.

“Unconscious?” That was all he heard. He wasn’t asking her questions about his disappeared love. That one word rang clearly in his head as if someone had blown a fog horn next to his ear. Why was she unconscious? What caused her to be unconscious? He examined her to see if she was hurt anywhere and then he got his answer when she pulled her thermal sleeves up. His hands flew to her wrists, his fingers grazing against the gauze. “What happened?” he asked.

“I tried to take my own life,” she admitted.

“Baby, why would ya do dat?” God, he couldn’t even comprehend the idea of Liz taking her own life. He pictured her tiny self crying, trying to end it all. What if she had succeeded? What if he had discovered that both Liz Parkers disappeared as if some cruel fate had doomed him so? What if—

She stiffened at the word ‘baby,’ but brushed it off as another one of his uncouth manners. “They don’t know why. I can’t tell them, but since you already know about Future-Liz, I guess it’s alright if you know,” she said, pulling away from him and taking a seat. If she told him about Future-Liz, then it would be okay to tell him about Future-Max. He would eventually know anyway. “Future-Max came to me to change the past so the future could be different., like Future-Liz did with you. I had to get Max to fall out of love with me so I had to... I broke his heart.”

“But dat’s not a reason to—“ Zan started only to be cut off by Liz.

“Wait, let me finish. You don’t know the full story,” Liz said. “Max is my world. He’s the reason I breathe. Breaking his heart, seeing his face when he saw me like… whatever I had done, I couldn’t handle it. All my friends were pulling away. Perhaps it was me who was pulling away, I don’t know. I felt like everything was closing down around me. I was drowning and I couldn’t get out of it. I loved—no… I love him so much. I couldn’t… I can’t stand the idea of him being with someone else other than me.”

Zan was jealous and angry. He was jealous that Max had this beautiful creature that loved him, angry that Max had her first, jealous again that she loved Max and not him, and angry once more that Max would let her go so easily. He wanted her to fall in love with him, Zan. He wanted her all to himself. If it were him, he would have never let her go. He pushed away his thoughts. She wasn’t Future-Liz. She was different, he reminded himself.

“I was in so much pain. I wasn’t strong enough, so… I tried to take my own life. Slit my wrists and laid in a tub of my own blood.” She didn’t tell him about Future-Max’s past. He didn’t need to know that. If anything, it would have given Zan more ammunition to go after Max because in the end, it was Max’s future-self that helped propel her towards her suicidal action.

He breathed, “Angel…”

“When I was unconscious, she came to me. She told me that I was strong, that I had many things left to do with my life. She told me you were coming. That’s how I knew your name. She was the one that brought me back here. I trusted her in hopes that things will be better this time around.” She didn’t tell him about the child yet. It was too soon. He and his group had only come yesterday. What was she going to do—just drop the bomb on him that she’s pregnant with his child, that he’s the father, that the child really belonged to her future self? Even Liz, herself, wasn’t done processing this information.

Shocked, Zan said nothing and took her into his arms once again. He was so torn apart. He didn’t want to lose her, but at the same time, he couldn’t place his feelings for her. Just the thought of Liz trying to kill herself made him shudder with fright.

At this moment, everything else was forgotten. It was only him and her. Yes, eggs be damned.

To be continued.

[kyliemou]

Thanks for standing by this story! Your comments keep me motivated to write: lizandzackfan, kay_b, jake17, Egyptian_Kiss, KiaraAlexisKlay, Natalie36, roswellian love, forever dreamer, XYZ, and roswell3053.

Q&A:

Loved this part. Oh but when you put the dates. You put both of them as Tuesday.

I know I PMed you about this already, but thank you! Another slip-up made by me! I should start a contest on picking up my mistakes. XD

EEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! Is Zan falling for her? What about Liz's feelings for Max, will she forget him and turn to Zan instead?

I love Max, but I love Zan… *shrugs*

Zan scoffed and smirked. “Trust meh, whatever I do, she’ll want.”

I loved that line!
Kylie I could just drown in this story!

Don’t drown, Carrie! I’m glad you liked it so. Isn’t that line something Zan would so typically say? God, I love Zan.

That was a good call about not having Liz tell Zan about the baby that soon- it would have been too much to handle. I think that Zan will better relate to Liz than anyone else about Future-Max because he himself fell in love with a Future character that now no longer exists; that is obviously a huge tie in that will link them beyond anyone else's understanding. Liz's PJs were cute, I want some! lol. Thanks for your concern *hugs back*, but I'm fine now. I've been gone the last couple weeks with my boyfriend- he whisked me away to Hawaii for a romantic getaway; unfortunately when I was reviewing your last chapter we were arguing, he was jealous of some guy that had made a pass at me...he's a little too overprotective sometimes, but I love him all the same

See, I thought so too—if I had Liz tell Zan straight off the bat, she’d only freak him out even more, especially since he is in such turmoil at the moment about Liz and Future-Liz. To be honest, I want Liz’s PJs too. Your welcome, I’m just glad you’re better now. Hawaii—you’re so lucky! Aww, a possessive overprotective boyfriend is good sometimes. It lets you know he cares for you deeply. I think I would worry if my (future) boyfriend or husband didn’t care if someone was hitting on me. I know I would grow four extra heads if I saw someone flirting with my (future) boyfriend/husband. What’s your story about? When you post it, comment or PM me the link. I would like to read it!

I think it's hilarious that Liz got pissed off with Zan for kissing her. I did in fact notice that she didn't get pissed at him until after he tried to blow it off.
poor Max. Sheesh, I've seen him fly off the handle so many times in such a short period I'm surprised the guy hasn't exploded into little piles of glistening green Antarian dustmotes, LOL.
I absolutely love that Zan had no regrets about kissing Liz.
And can I say, Rath being a hidden cuddler? *squees and buries her face in a pillow*
Lonnie and Ava sharing Liz's bed was an 'aww' moment
I'm proud of the Roswell set for not accepting the Dupes with open arms.
Zan's 'conversation' for Future-Liz just about broke my heart. How do you make this tough guy still be tough and yet break my heart with some gruff romantic spiel that on anyone else would just be ridiculous but on Zan it's just so...right? Gah, if I had half as much talent as you do in that I 'd probably have Da Man n His Woman finished by now, lol.
I'm anxious to see what's coming next, and I don't blame Liz for not telling Zan right away that he's going to be a daddy. LOL. I mean, c'mon, Liz goes from almost killing herself, to being brought back and impregnated by the child of her future-self and her ex-boyfriend's twin, to suddenly coming face to face with them not even what...24-48 hours after all is said and done? It's bound not to have sank in for her.
Zan is so gone. He knows that Liz isn't the Liz he'd fallen in love with, yet it seems he can't help himself, much like Liz can't help falling for a guy who looks like Max Evans, lol. And I don't think that Zan is transferring his feelings from Future Liz onto Present Liz....even though they are the 'same' person, they are also very different, due to the timeline and the different experiences that each went through/ are going through. Future Liz had it rough, but she came from a timeline that up until Khivar took over, was almost fairytale. Present Liz, thanks to all the Future People Invading her life, has gone through so much more than either Future Evans' could have believed.

Oh dear K, I fear this is going to be a long reply back. If you ever want to talk, give me a PM, okay? I’m here for you!
I think if Zan hadn’t played it off as nothing, Liz would still have gotten pissed at him, but probably not as much. But the fact that he was blowing her off like that, well… any woman would be furious.
I’m really putting Max through the grinder, aren’t I? I can’t help it and I really don’t mean to, but that’s just how the story works out. I mean, Max loves Liz and everything Liz does somehow affects him too. So since this is a Liz-centered story, Max is being dragged along for the bumpy ride. It’s okay—he’ll get his happy ending too.
Zan isn’t the type of guy that regrets often. He’s so used to doing whatever he wants that he doesn’t see a problem in all of his actions. That’s what makes him Zan.
I don’t know why, but I always saw Rath as the type of person that would cuddle. I don’t know why, I just do!
Lonnie and Ava sharing Liz’s bed is an “Aww” moment, but the fact that they took advantage of a sleeping Liz is also a “LOL” and a “How rude!” moment too. I think if it were Isabel and pre-evil Tess, they would’ve woken up Liz. But seeing how it is Lonnie and Ava, who grew up in sewers in New York, they don’t really care too much about taking advantage. Awww, did you wake up with a crick in your neck?
It’s too Hollywood if I make the Roswell set quickly accept the Dupes. There will be tension! :evil:
OMFGGGGGGGG, YOU WROTE DA MAN N HIS WOMAN?! ASDFGHJKL!!!!!!!!!!!! HURRY UP AND FINISH THE GODDAMN THING! DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR A NEW POST FROM YOU? I STILL HAVE IT ON MY BOOKMARKS, BUT NOW IT’S UNDER “WATCHING FICS [OLD]” AS POSSIBLY ABANDONED! UPDATE NOW! I SWEAR, WOMAN! YOU OWE ME BECAUSE THE LAST POST WAS ON AUGUST 1, 2007! ASDFGHJKL! I DID NOT REALIZE I WAS IN THE PRESENCE OF THE GREAT AUTHOR! GAHHHHHHH! POST NOW, NOW, NOW, NOW! *bites off a piece of your arm* (I seriously need to read stories and pay attention to the author’s usernames. *sighs*)
I don’t think I have talent. I think you have talent. Are you ever going to update it though? Or is it completely abandoned now?
See, Liz is strong, but not that strong as we saw with her suicide attempt, but though she has determination, she needs time to figure things out herself. I think if I were in her situation, I would have broken down a long, LONG time ago. It would be too much to drop the bomb on everyone just when she was recovering and when the dupes arrived. It would be too much in such a short time span. It just wouldn’t work out or be realistic.
Zan is confused. Unlike Future-Liz and Present-Liz who did not feel guilty, Zan does. For him, he has never experienced love before and he’s even wary of it too. For him to be in love with Future-Liz and to be suddenly in love with Present-Liz is wrecking havoc on his character. I know some of my readers have argued that Zan is not Max hence F-Liz is cheating on her husband. Since I made F-Liz go yaya over Zan, I’m making Zan go through an emotional crisis.
*sighs in relief* Wow, that was long. That’s half a chapter right there. XP

Wow, that was great!!
I love this!!! They already seem so close though they've only interacted with a future Liz...amazing! Its strange how at the time I didn't quite realise the impact she was having on both of them...how she's changed them both...or at least to the extent that she seems to have impacted on them. I can't wait to see how their relationship progresses. I hope Future Liz's prediction was right, about how present Liz will love him too. While I love Max, especially your max, where he's not treating her like crap and that even though so much has happened he still cares about her...I am hoping for a Zan/Liz pairing right now...or double dipper. I just think the two of them are so broken, and that Max and Liz just wouldn't work as well now as they did before. I just know that now I've written that, you're gonna do a huge dreamer thing and make me want them to work it out!!! You're an evil genius like that!!

What can I say, Rach? I’m a Dreamer first at heart.

Another chapter so soon, you are fabulous!!!
I really like how you create round characters. The little detail about Rath need to cuddle somethimg at night was not only amusing to read but also gave Rath a new facet of his character. It makes the story more interesting. You get to know the character in a more intimate way, when you know such details.
I also like, that you mention little things, such as the eggs and late you pick them up again, as you did with the last sentence.

Yes, eggs be damned.

It feels like a circle that closes.
I hope to read more about Liz and Zan’s interaction. Right now their bound is very fragile. But Liz seems to trust Zan. She needs to trust him. In my opinion Liz needs someone who can be strong for her.
Thank for another superb read.
And I guess English is just fine as language.

Awww, thanks J! In this story, I hope to not just incorporate only Max, Liz, and Zan tension. In the header on the first chapter, I did list the couples as a conventional and as unconventional with all of the Roswell set and the Dupes (ie: Michael/Maria, Rath/Maria). I want to explore the sides of these couples and their individual characters as well. I think I may be favoring Rath over Lonnie and Ava, but hopefully I’ll find a chapter where I can really shine a whole new side to them.

Great update. I'm glad that Zan and Liz talked a little about Future Liz. I hope that this will help them become more comfortable with one another. I think that once news of the baby comes out, Liz will have to fess up to everyone about both Future Liz and Future Max. I can't wait to see how everything turns out. Hurry back soon.

I’m hurrying, I’m hurrying! =D I’m writing as fast as my fingers allow me (and as fast as my brain can process up a chapter storyline).











Author’s Note: With this story, I’ve gotten to the point where I now actually vocalize the dialogue as I type it. It’s quite scary because I do a husky voice for Zan and my regular voice for Liz. I get so into it that I don’t even realize till I’m done with a certain section. Is this weird?

So ten unsatisfied pages later with one dead bug that has been disembodied all over my room, including four hours of sleep, I present Chapter 17.

I have included some links in the chapter just in case some of you don't understand a lingo or a pop culture reference. =] If you miss it, there will be links and explanations at the end of this chapter.

All spelling errors in the dialogue of the Dupes are intentional. There will start to be some other coupling action now as you can tell from this chapter and later future chapters. As XYZ said, I'm creating round characters. Also, the time span is going to be speeding up now. I will start doing weeks rather than day by day. This is to move the story along. Yay, right? =P






Chapter Seventeen:

Out of luck and out of tune.
Half a day and I'm confused.
Love may wash away the bruise,
but I still ain't over you.

Hey, I'm the blood in your veins.
I'm a colding rain.
Love you hard when it rains.
Time, no it ain't all aside.
On the truth she lies.
Love your tear when you cry.

Damn the day that I forgot.
Came so close and almost lost.
It's been one year and fourteen months,
but I still ain't over you.

Hey, I'm the blood in your veins.
I'm a colding rain.
Love you hard when it rains.
Time, no it ain't all aside.
On the truth she lies.
Love your tear when you cry.

Back and forth and side to side,
right ain't wrong if wrong ain't right.
I will love you day and night
'cause I still ain't over you.

Hey, I'm the blood in your veins.
I'm a colding rain.
Love you hard when it rains.
Time, no it ain't all aside.
On the truth she lies.
Love your tear when you cry.

'Cause when the walls come crashing in,
when flames come coasting in.
Just remember time again,
I still ain't over you.

Oh hey, I'm the blood in your veins.
I'm a colding rain.
Love you hard when it rains.
Time, no it ain't all aside
'cause on the truth she lies.
Love your tear when you cry.
“I Still Aint’ Over You,” Augustana.

December 21, 2000, Thursday; Roswell, New Mexico:

Liz didn’t understand Zan one bit. On Tuesday, she thought they had reached an understanding, seeing that they were on the same side since they were saving the Roswell group, but boy had she thought wrong. One minute, Zan was warm like he had been on Tuesday when he held her—momentarily anyway... Then the next, he was as cold as dry ice.

Flashback: Zan couldn’t even fathom the idea of his ex-lover’s younger self attempting suicide. He had been so shocked that all he wanted to do was comfort her. He didn’t know what else to do but hug her. Suddenly, his feelings took over and his body moved to wrap his arms around her. Her petite frame molded to his larger body, arousing him the slightest the bit. But she wasn’t his. He couldn’t just openly touch this girl—he didn’t have the right. Future-Liz was the love of his life, not this person. But did he love her—this younger self of his lover from the future? His mind raced with contrasting thoughts and his body expressed this turmoil by quickly becoming stiff. He was troubled and felt nothing but the desire to run away as far as possible.

“Zan?” asked Liz, wondering what was wrong. She could feel his rigid body against hers. It wasn’t the soft comforting gesture she had felt in the beginning. It was uncomfortable.

He pushed her aside and said, “Don’t touch me.” Then he strolled out of the kitchen like he had a mission.

Liz stood there completely flabbergasted. It was Zan who touched her, Zan who hugged her, Zan who had initiated this… whatever it was. She hadn’t done anything but told him her story. “What the hell?” she said to herself, completely baffled by the situation. She shook her head, refusing to allow herself to get even more furious, but she did. Zan was a man of ups and downs, a man that could not be described to a few adjectives. It infuriated her of how he treated her. He was kind one moment and then rude the next. Asking herself again in less than twenty-four hours, Who does that? Eyeing the uncooked ingredients, she sighed, taking up what Zan had left unfinished in the kitchen. “Great, he has a fit, leaves, and I get stuck with the cooking,” she said to no one in particular.

When she served the omelets to the group who were satisfied with the first real comfortable sleep they had in days, she scowled when Zan came in and took a seat as if nothing had happened. He took one bite and said, “This is fucking disgusting,” and left for another smoke. Liz only stood there with a shocked face. He comes in for what—thirty seconds—complains about my cooking, and leaves again, she thought to herself, this is getting ridiculous!

The group watched, slightly confused yet at the same time, unconfused. They knew what he was probably feeling. It was hard on them too. Future-Liz may have only been in their lives for less than two weeks, but she made a huge impact on them. They accepted her, an outsider, and took her in as family. In those few days, it seemed like life couldn’t get any better. Lonnie and Ava had a new girl among the group. Rath had gotten a new sister. Zan finally opened his heart. Then when she disappeared… the subject of her disappearance was still too raw to talk about. They missed her, shuddered when they thought of how their king had screamed, and mourned the loss of their new family member. But coming to Roswell and seeing her younger version—it was too much to handle. They notice the differences quickly, but Liz, present-Liz that is, was still as kind and fun as Future-Liz. For them, it was different from what Zan was feeling. They were happy to get another chance, a longer chance, to be Liz’s friend. But Zan felt confusion, rage, and uneasiness—all three emotions rolled up into one. His emotions were risking their chance to be Liz’s friend once again.

Rath shrugged, choosing to ignore the topic of how Zan was feeling. He knew his friend needed to sort things out for himself. Rath, himself, tried many times to tell him that Liz wasn’t Future-Liz, but he never listened. So in the end, he gave up. “I don’t know what he’s on about. This is good!” he spoke, taking another mouthful.

“I agree,” said Lonnie, taking another bite while pouring tabasco sauce on the uneaten parts at the same time.

Ava glared at Zan’s retreating back and just gave Liz a smile as if to tell her she understood. “Don’t worry. That’s jus’ Zan bein’ Zan.”

To Liz, it seemed as if everything she had done was wrong in Zan’s eyes. Every time he walked into the same room as her, he left, growling about how she was stalking him. He yelled at her, cursed at her, and even pushed her!

Flashback: Liz had been holding it in for too long. She had to go! She pressed her fingers against her lower abdomen and winced at the feeling of her bladder getting ready to explode. She had been meaning to go, but she was so caught up in Ava telling her stories about their life in New York—how they hatched, learned to speak, and how they discovered they were different from the rest. She was so entranced by their story that she somehow had forgotten she needed to go to the bathroom. Running to the backroom, just as she was about to turn the knob, the door swung open and Zan stepped out.

“You again!” he said as if she was the most annoying thing in the world.

She ignored him; the desire to pee was greater than getting into another verbal fight with him. She moved to the left and he moved too. They blocked each other. He shifted to the right and she stepped to the right. “Move!” she yelled at him.

“Then get out of my way!” he said, shoving her to the side.

“Ah!” yelped Liz as she was pushed away.

Liz had enough with it! They had only known each other for a little less than two days and Zan was being a downright prick. He had no right to treat her that way!

Seeing her chance, she cornered him in the open café in front of the dupes, not caring anymore. “What is your problem?” she asked.

“What are ya on ‘bout?” Zan asked. “Get out of mah way,” he said as he stepped to the side.

She blocked him. “No, this stops now! You’ve been a complete jerk to me ever since you came!”

“I’m da jerk? If ya wasn’t so fuckin’ ubiquitous, I wouldn’t hafta be!”

“Oh, lookie here. The king knows what ubiquitous means!”

“You betta watch yerself,” he said, getting in her face. He was letting his anger get the best of him, just like Liz was with herself. “Ya might say somethin’ and I might hafta do somethin’ ‘bout it.”

“I am so scared,” said Liz, surprising herself a little with this new found attitude of hers. “For your information, I happen to live here and you’re my guest, so I suggest you change this uptight cocky attitude of yours!”

Lonnie and Ava watched curiously, sipping their sodas. This was so reminiscent of when Future-Liz yelled at Zan. Rath grabbed himself a piece of cake. This was like a fight ready to happen and he was supplying himself with snacks.

Angered by the sudden challenge, Zan automatically lifted up his hand. He wasn’t going to use his powers on her, but it was a reflex. His hand was in her face before he could stop himself.

“You want to fight? Take your best shot!” Liz yelled, jumping up at him. Her words had no hestitation in them, but in reality, she was actually terrified that Zan would try to blow her face off.

Frustration was what Zan was feeling—a lot of it. He looked upwards, muttered something to himself, and lifted her up. Liz made a yelp as she was suddenly elevated from the ground. He held her at arm’s length and carried her to the backroom. Normally she would be amazed at his strength, but this wasn’t the time. Liz yelled when her back came into contact with the swinging door and the two continued to the back.

Unable to resist himself, Rath spoke, “What’s da chances they gonna make da beast wit’ two backs?” To help visualize his words, he thrust his hips with a grunt and held his arms out as if he was holding someone’s thighs, taking her doggie-style.

“Yer disgustin’,” Ava said, shaking her head. Rath was her brother, but sometimes she didn’t know how to put up with him.

“Naw, I doubt it,” said Lonnie, scrunching her nose up in disgust from being reminded of her brother’s sexcapades. The image of the rocking van suddenly flashed in her mind. She shuddered.

“Aw, come on? Las’ time he took ‘er, well future her, they humped da shit outta each otha,” he said. “We trio know she ain’t her, but come on… Ya think Zan knows dat? He’s gonna fuck her against them lockers wit’ her skirt hiked up.”

“Rath, yer an ass. She was like a sis and ya talk ‘bout her like ya wanna do her,” replied Ava. “I ditto wit’ Lonnie. Zan jus’ met ‘er. He ain’t gonna do her.”

Rath shrugged. “She mah sis. I wouldn’t kick it to ‘er, but I ain’t gonna lie she’s not tight.” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and smirked. “Wanna bet they fuck or not?”

- - - -

“Let me down!” screamed Liz as she fought her way to get out of his grip, but was only successful in swinging her legs back and forth like an angry child throwing a tantrum.

Zan dropped her on the sofa, infuriated. “Shut up!” He needed to think. Yes, thinking was the best option in this moment.

She quickly got up. “Don’t tell be to shut up! One minute, you’re fine. The next, you’ve got a pole up your ass. I can’t stand it anymore!”

What is she trying to do, wondered Zan. He didn’t like people pushing him nor did he like being cornered the way she did with him. He was a man of cold steel—emotionless and rational. He was always in control of emotions, in control of himself, but something about this girl pushed all his buttons. With Future-Liz, she challenged him many times, but he knew how to push her buttons back. But Liz, she was so naïve. He didn’t know what to expect of her. “It’s all yer fault!” he said, trying to keep his voice from screaming level.

Liz stepped back. “My fault? I haven’t done anything wrong! What have I done to you? I only just met you three days ago! Tell me what I possibly could have done in those two days to make you hate me so!”

“I’m not him!”

“What? Him who?” she asked.

Zan gritted his teeth. “I ain’t him and you’re not her.”

Liz shook her head. He wasn’t making any sense at all. What did he mean he’s not him and she’s not her? It felt like minutes, but it only took her seconds to finally understand what he meant. “Wait a minute, are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

“GOD!” yelled Zan as he began to walk away from her only to be stopped by Liz who caught his wrist.

“Talk to me!” yelled Liz.

“I don’t wanna talk! Don’t ya git it?”

“Damn it, Zan! It’s not my fault I happen to look like my future self because god forbid I turn black as I get older! Is this what this has been about—because you can’t separate me with Future-Liz?”

He didn’t say anything because she was right.

Liz shook her head in disbelief. “Do you think it was easy for me? I mean, I not only met with me from the future, but I met Max from the future. He wore the same face too!”

“It ain’t dat easy,” he said.

“Do you think I didn’t have a hard time separating them two as well? Well, tough luck, Zan, because I did and I managed to do it too,” said Liz. “But you have to realize that Future-Liz and I are completely different. Yeah, she came back, but I know what’s going to happen. Things are changing; I am changing… Changing from what you knew of Future-Liz. You can’t keep doing this to me. It’s just not my fault!”

He knew she was right. Liz, whether present or future, was always smart and rational. He thought those very same words she spoke, but he didn’t want to admit to it. He just needed to hear the words from her. She made everything seem real. He had been so caught up with confusing them together that he could barely focus on their differences. He knew they were different, but at the same time, he didn’t know what qualities.

This girl had been through the same ordeal he had gone through. Future-Liz disappeared and so did Future-Max. He loved Future-Liz. She probably loved Future-Max. He didn’t know how close she was to the guy, but if she still loved Max and he wore his face, then he knew they must’ve been more than just friends.

Coming to terms with this, still a little uneasy, he knew he was in the wrong. He had been a jerk to her and she didn’t deserve it, not from him. She was hurting, but so was he. “I’m sorry,” he spoke.

This apology was too easy for her. “That’s it? You say a simple ‘I’m sorry’ and I’m supposed to pretend it’s all okay?”

Zan scowled at her, gritted his teeth, and tried to get over his high horse. “I’m sorry, angel, for b—“

“Liz,” she stated.

His right eye twitched. “I’m sorry, Liz, for bein’ a prick, okay?”

“And for pushing me.”

God, what the hell is wrong with her, he thought, I’m already apologizing and she wants to add more? She should know better than apologizing is not in my nature. “And for pushin’ you.”

She was satisfied. “Apology accepted.”

“Okay,” he spoke. He then realized he had man-handled Liz into the backroom. He could picture his family’s faces. They prob thinkin’ we’s fuckin’, he thought.

“We should go back out there. They’re probably worried,” said Liz.

When they came out, the three dupes were staring at them as if they were looking for something. Lonnie squinted at Zan and Liz. Ava made an “hmm” noise. Rath studied them as if he was going to be quizzed in five minutes.

Knowing exactly what they were thinking, Zan shook his head. “You’s a bunch of pervs. We didn’t do nothin’,” he said.

“Ahah! Pay up!” said Ava who stuck her hand out at Rath.

Rath reached into his pocket with a scowl and withdrew a twenty dollar bill. “I suppose ya want yer payment too, Lon’?” he asked.

Lonnie smiled. “Naw, I’ll save yer payment for later,” she said with a wink.

Rath could only grin foolishly.

Confused, Liz spoke, “Umm, guys? Huh? What just happened?”

- - - -

December 22, 2000, Friday to January 9, 2001, Tuesday; Roswell, New Mexico:

Over the next several days, since Zan and Liz had finally worked everything out, the dupes bonded with the Roswell group as if they were always living there. They all had more in common than they thought, besides their fashion sense. But of course, there were always still many differences.

“Maria’s my girl,” stated Michael.

“I don’t see yer name written on her,” said Rath.

“Listen here, dick, I’m going to rip your he—“

“Michael, don’t make me go over there!” yelled Maria from the other side of the room who was watching them. She knew her boyfriend would cause trouble. “Stick to the questions I gave you!”

Michael was still angry at Rath for hitting on Maria. The first time Michael had ever taken an interest in a girl, much less a human girl, his twin was trying to take her from him. Well, it seemed that way. He stared down at the flimsy napkin that Maria gave to him. She had written down several questions to get them connecting, but he didn’t see that happening any time soon. Sensing her glare on him, his eyes scrolled down the questions. He rather asks questions than be beaten by Maria. She had a hell of an arm on her.

“Favorite band?” he asked.

“Metallica,” replied Rath.

Michael’s right eyebrow rose. He wasn’t expecting that. He nodded in approvement. So they had one thing in common. That didn’t matter to him. He still hated his twin. So he replied, “Good,” and their conversation ended there.

Zan and Max were both being stubborn-headed They weren’t getting along one bit, but that was to be expected given the events that had occurred. But they did have one main thing in common: their love for Liz, but at the moment, this wasn’t on their mind.

“I’m king,” said Max.

“In yer dreams, stand-in. I’m da king,” replied Zan.

Both just watched at each other as if mentally having a battle of penis sizes.

Lonnie and Isabel, well… they both were popular among the men, one namely Alex. They were beautiful and if they wanted to, they could be models.

“How do you get your shadow to do that?” asked Isabel, fascinated by Lonnie’s makeup.

“Ya jus’ gotta smudge it all ovah, but nothin’ alien powers can’t do,” replied Lonnie. “Ya jus’ gotta learn how tah tweak it a bit.”

The only ones that were completely and utterly different were Ava and Tess. Ava was kind and she made it a point to befriend the Roswell set, but Tess was always glaring at everyone, including her own group. Ava didn’t believe in their destined path, but Tess clung to it as if it was a lifeline.

“Max and I belong together,” said Tess. “It’s destiny.”

“Ew?” said a disgusted Ava. “Uhhh, Johnny Depp or Robert Downey Jr.?”

“Neither,” replied Tess. “I like Ben Affleck.”

Ava choked on her soda and began to gag. “Gross, he’s so fug!”

Gossip travelled among the inhabitants of Roswell, speaking of the punk twins. Everyone was confused, but Isabel, being the queen bee she was, snapped at everyone for sticking their nose in their family business. Mouths were shut. The gossip died down a little, but everyone still wondered who these new people were. All they knew, of course and obviously, was the twins were lost family.

As for Liz, her parents had come back from their vacation, surprised to see their daughter had taken the liberty of getting roommates in their home. At first, they thought it was Max, Isabel, Michael, and Ava who suddenly wanted to be part of the “cool” trend, but after much explanation from their daughter, they realized who they really were. They were shocked because of the chances that four of their Roswell residents had twins. It was even weirder that these four were good friends like their own set. They were a little hesitant about letting these ruffians stay at their home, but upon hearing their homeless situation, the Parkers were more than willing to let them stay as long as they helped out with the chores of the home and even work at the Crashdown. Thus everyone had their own roles in the home. Rath helped Michael out in the kitchen (when they weren’t trying to burn each other at the grill) while Lonnie and Ava helped Liz and Maria with the waitressing. Zan would fix anything that had broken down and sometimes clean up the Crashdown during closing time.

When the Evans parents were introduced to the dupes, they were shocked at the resemblance. Again, what were the odds that four orphans would have identical twins? Afraid, Diane thought they were going to take their babies away from them, but Zan just laughed and asked her if he looked capable of handling the four brats himself. She nervously said no and he agreed. Actually, he said, “Look lady. I got mah own crew to support. I ain’t takin’ those no good for nothin’ rugrats under mah wing. Shit, they’s prob better wit’ you, all fuckin’ goody-two-shoed like it’s some re-run of the Brady Bunch.” It’s safe to say that Nancy could only gap at his crudeness. He let her know that they were staying in Roswell for a while, perhaps permanently, but he wasn’t going to take them away from her. Honestly, Zan, deep down, was jealous that his double grew up in a home with a family that loved him dearly—something he never had. He had to fend for himself since birth and he never knew a mother’s loving touch.

When Jim finally had been introduced to them, like Michael, he didn’t trust them. He even did a background search on them and found they had been arrested a few times with many charges against them that never stuck as if the evidence had suddenly disappeared. He knew that was to be expected, seeing that they were aliens who could make all evidence disappear into thin air. Kyle assured his father that they were alright people and they had just been dealt a bad hand since they were born. Still, Jim remained wary of them.

Over the days, Zan and Liz had bonded the most. Because both had been affected so greatly by people from the future, they reached an understanding, a level where they both understood that they have much of the similar feelings and thoughts. Constantly laughing, they were always seen together, just chatting away. Zan, who had bought a motorcycle, was seen driving with Liz on the back throughout Roswell, taking trips out to the desert and back after dinner. They loved the air that breezed through their hair as the machine under them roared. The stars seemed to move with them and the moon seemed so reachable. They were content, feeling nothing but comfortableness as they rode together with her arms around his waist. Many could see they clearly felt something for one another. This didn’t settle well with Max who became more and more jealous with each passing second. He knew what Liz had done to him, but to see the love of his life get on the bike of practically a stranger, she felt farther from him that ever before. It was as if she and Zan both shared a secret that brought them closer. Truthfully, they did, but no one else knew what it was.

Tess kept pursuing Max, finding reasons to be at his side. She dangled the fact that Liz was off with another man and constantly told him to move on. She reminded him of his destiny, but he wasn’t having any of it. It wasn’t that easy for him to just drop everything he’s ever felt and move on. Since the third grade, it had always been Liz Parker for him.

On a Tuesday night, after the Crashdown closed, the group lounged in the café, resting and smiling, clearly somewhat more comfortable with one another. “So then he was like, ‘Hell no!’” Kyle said, bursting into laughter. The humans followed, bearing their pearly whites at him.

“So cornball,” muttered Lonnie, rolling her eyes as she watched the humans tell stories in a booth. Turning the high chair away from them, she found Ava staring at Kyle with her mouth slightly parted open.

“I thought it was funny,” Ava said meekly, flipping her pink bangs over her shoulder.

Lonnie snorted. “‘Course ya did. You jus’ wanna git in his pants.”

“What? No, I don’t—… He’s cute.“

“Yeah, in a total Full House’s Steve Hale kind of way,” Lonnie retorted. “Lyin’ don’t suit ya. Look, yer cheeks glowin’ pink like you gots slapped.”

Rath appeared by their side and growled into Lonnie’s ear, “Ah, leave ‘er alone. We all gots needs—needs dat need to be satisfied.” She moaned as his hands slid up her back to her shoulders. His fingers soothed the kinks out of her muscles before grazing the side of her face. “Ya smell good,” he whispered, burying his nose into her short blonde hair. Lonnie grabbed the back of his neck and crushed his lips to hers.

Silence. There was silence among everyone. Then there were gasping.

“Oh my god, Rath and Lonnie are making out!” Kyle cried in horror. “It’s like—it’s like Michael and Isabel! Woo hoo hoo,” Kyle chucked in surprise. He quickly took out his cell phone and snapped a picture. “This is going to be my wallpaper!”

Alex and Maria covered their faces. Both simply said, “Oh no. Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew!”

Liz’s eyes widened in shock and then a smile formed on her face. It grew bigger when she heard Maria cry, “Oh my god, that’s my boyfriend’s fucking face sucking yours, Isabel.”

Isabel, in much horror, replied, “Michael, if you ever want to live, don’t ever, ever, look at me again.”

“Ditto” was his uncomfortable response as he tried to shift as far as away as possible from Isabel.

“Michael, you’re not going to leave me for—for Isabel, are you?” asked Maria.

“Of course not! She’s like my sister!”

“That’s not brotherly-and-sisterly love right there, my friend,” said Kyle as Rath’s hand started to travel under Lonnie’s shirt. Alex offered a comforting pat to Michael’s back, slightly disgusted himself at the sight of the love of his life’s twin making out with another man, a man who wore his friend’s face.

Having enough, Michael screamed, “Would you two quit it?!” at the clueless couple. Rath and Lonnie pulled away with a heated dazed look.

“Wha’ man? Yer blockin’ mah cock here,” Rath said, motioning to his groin.

“Cock blockage! There will be major cock blockage because there will be no cock involved!” yelled Michael.

Awkward silence. Nothing but awkward silence. Alex shook his head in disturbed humor. Breaking the silence, he asked, “You guys are together?”

“Not really,” replied Rath.

“Meaning?” Maria asked.

“We fuck. Dat’s ‘bout it,” Lonnie said with a shrug. Michael and Isabel started to gag.

“Because of the whole destiny thing?” Kyle asked.

“Naw man. She’s a good fuck. Cries like a bitch in heat,” Rath said.

Lonnie began to make hand gestures as she said, “Rath’s got a really long—“ Maria snorted.

“NO! NO! I don’t want to hear it!” cried Isabel who was wishing the ground would swallow her up.

“So Ava,” Kyle said, moving up to her. “Are you with Zan?” He hears Zan making an “ugh” sound but ignored it.

Scrunching up her face, she replied, “Hell no. He’s like mah bro. He sees me like he sees Rath—a boy bro.”

“I see no brother or boy, only a beautiful lady.” He then hopefully asked, “Single then?”

“Wouldn’t ya like to know,” she said with a wink. Kyle broke out in a grin.

Filling soda into a cup, Liz placed it in front of Zan who was watching her. She rubbed her hands against her apron, feeling uncomfortable under his stare. “So you’re not with Ava?”

“Naw, I gots my eye on someone else,” he smirked. She blushed.

Maria stared at her boyfriend and started to play with his hair. She pressed the sides toward the center, making a semi-faux hawk. Michael was sexy in her eyes, but Rath with his bared arms and his tattoos….

“Hey, stop! ’Ria, what are you doing?”

“Maybe you should get a tattoo,” she suggested.

“Why, so I can look like Rath?”

“Hey, you can take some tips from him. He isn’t so bad either.”

“Then why don’t you go sleep with him?” he jealously said, getting up and walking into the backroom.

“’ey Pixie, if he ever messes up, don’t be afraid to come to meh,” Rath said. “I’d treat ya real good, treat ya like a queen.”

Maria didn’t know exactly how to feel about that offer. Obviously she wasn’t going to take it. “Weren’t you just making out with Lonnie a second ago?”

With a smirk and wink, he whispered, “I rather have you,” and then left the Crashdown.

To be continued.

Pop Culture References: If you haven't clicked already:
“The Brady Bunch” was a 1969-1974 American sitcom about a family. Though they had problems, they were often seen as the typical perfect American family.
“Steven ‘Steve’ Hale” is a character from “Full House” (1987-1995 American sitcom) who was dating D.J. Tanner. — I'm comparing him to Kyle because Steve was on the wrestling team and well... to me, Kyle looks like he could be on a wrestling team. Go jocks?
“Fug” means F--king Ugly.
“Block your cock” is a line from the 2007 movie, “Superbad”.