Before It's Too Late (AUWOA,M/L,ADLT)COMPLETED~12/30/07

Finished stories that feature the characters from the show, but there are no aliens. All fics completed on the main AU without Aliens board will eventually be moved here.

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RebeccaBehrEvans
Addicted Roswellian
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Joined: Mon Dec 30, 2002 3:17 pm
Location: Like Heidi... in the green, but freaking cold mountain!!

Post by RebeccaBehrEvans »

From his agitated state, she guessed that calling whoever he obviously wanted to call was not an easy task but still, if he couldn't make that decision, he could at least let the others use it.

"Uh… n-no… go ahead!" Max said before he could really consider it, and stepped back to make room for her.

He didn't go far though, which apparently bothered the woman and after she threw him a sideway glare, he had no choice but to move and go back to his uncomfortable chair.

Of course he could have just waited for her to finish and called after, but even he could admit that he had just been waiting for an excuse to avoid doing so. He didn't think he could go through with it anyway, and he would probably end up insulting Kyle first before really informing him of Liz's situation.

He didn't know much more about her state than when he had arrived in fact anyway, the only thing he had been told so far being that for the moment everything was going well, better than the doctors had expected it in fact. It was something already of course and he couldn't afford to complain he guessed, but he would have preferred if they had told him that they had finished and that Liz was completely out of danger at last.

As he sat down again, he felt a strange sense of liberation at not having called in the end. Truth be told he didn't want Kyle anywhere near Liz, now not more than ever. He actually wanted to be the only one to be there for her, the only one to take care of her because that was his job. He was her husband after all, what was Kyle? Nothing, as far as he was concerned. And if he looked at things logically, he had not even called the Parkers yet, having decided before to wait to know more about Liz and how she was doing before alerting them and turning their life upside down as well, so why in the hell should he call Valenti first? It wouldn’t make any sense, right? Again, that was what he thought, too.

Funny how taking the decision to not call had been way easier than to do it. If he really had to, he would do so when he wouldn't have any other choice left. Maybe when Liz would be out of the operating room and lucid enough to make her own decision -and despite what that could mean, he really hoped it would be soon- he would ask her what she wanted to do, but till then, he would be the only one at her bedside when she would open her eyes.

This was his chance, however dramatic the circumstances. This was an opportunity that was given to him to show her what she meant to him, despite everything that had happened between them, to show her that he wouldn't give up on them this time, that he didn't care about the past anymore and that he wanted them to try again. She would maybe not believe him, maybe she would even think that it was already too late, but he would be there with her every step of the way. No matter what.
~ * ~
Sweat pearled down the column of her neck, but she didn't even notice. Her calves started to burn from the exertion but she kept running nonetheless, needing the exercise to get her mind off other matters.

She had called him again before starting but once more had only gotten his voice mail, and even if she knew that she shouldn't let herself think about that, she couldn't help wondering where the hell he was. The thought that he could be with that bitch of his was enough to make her want to gag, or maybe just hit something in anger.

She wondered what she could have come up with again this time to have him all but running to her with his tail between his legs, like the pathetic dog he could be sometimes when it came to her, and she cursed her to the pit of hell for still having such a hold on him.

She hadn't gotten much details, but knowing that conniving, cheating slut, whatever had happened to make him leave like he had, was most likely nothing serious, even if that was how she had wanted to make it look. She wouldn't put it past her either to use the lowest tricks in the book to have him exactly where she wanted him. He was the one who couldn't see past her innocent face, but she definitely didn't have that same problem. Now if only she could open his eyes as well.

The phone rang again in the background and once more she was just tempted to ignore it like she had already twice before, thinking that whoever was calling would quickly notice that he wasn't home, but the insistent and repetitive thrilling sound soon got on her nerves and eventually she stepped down the treadmill and stomped to the other side of the room to grab the cordless receiver.

"Hello?" she all but grunted into the phone, still panting some from her run.

"Hello?" she repeated in exasperation when all she got for answer was a long silence. Yet, she could clearly hear someone breathing on the other end of the line and that fact only unnerved her more.

"I-Isabel?" an hesitant voice reached her ears and she all but rolled her eyes.

Okay, whoever this was, was clearly not up to date with Isabel's whereabouts because it was supposed to be common knowledge that she was in Europe and didn't plan to come back any time soon. Or at least her friends and family were supposed to know that.

"No, it's Tess… who are you?" she replied irritably, while inwardly cursing the idiot who had bothered her when she was shaping her body. Not that she really needed to, but Max being someone who worked out regularly, she didn't doubt that he would appreciate. And it would certainly not hurt either if he came back to find her in nothing but her sport-bra and spandex short.

"T-Tess?…" the woman repeated, and she couldn't miss how just uttering her name seemed to cost her.

However, before she could question her and ask her what her problem was, with her, or with her being here, she hung up on her without another word.

Looking at the phone like it was a foreign thing, Tess just frowned, wondering what this was all about, until a thought crossed her mind and she suddenly couldn't help but smile like the cat that ate the canary at the possibility.

Maybe she had been worrying for nothing. Maybe she had been wrong all along. And if she was, then this was definitely going to work for her.
~ * ~
Hours seemed to stretch to no end and with them Max's patience started to wear thin as well. It felt like centuries to him since the last time he had seen a nurse come in or out of those damned doors. An eternity since he had heard a noise around in fact.

Weren't hospitals supposed to be always busy? Animated? Weren't there supposed to be people running everywhere? Here everything seemed like to be suspended in time, like life had stopped altogether and the whole world was waiting with him for some sign, some news, anything. Here everything seemed suddenly… dead… and Max really didn't like how that made him feel. No, he didn't like it one bit.

Hands shaking in nervousness, he massaged his neck, hoping to alleviate the soreness there, but it didn't seem to do him any good. Nothing seemed to calm him, appease his fears, soothe his now tired body. He felt uncomfortable in his own skin, like he was slowly burning from the inside out, and he nearly cried out aloud in frustration.

God, he needed to get out of there. He needed some air, needed to clear his head, or he would break something and soon.

Quick strides led him to the entrance doors and the instant he was out, he doubled over, hand on his knees, avidly gulping for air while he fought tears of desperation and waves of nausea, the sight of his blood-stained shirt definitely not helping to stop the rolling in his stomach.

He didn't know how much more of this he still could take. Seriously. Inside, the walls seemed to be slowly closing in on him, outside, he was just too far from Liz. Nothing seemed to be good enough for him anymore. No matter what he did, or how he looked at it.

If someone had told him this morning that this was were he would end up, he would have done his best to never wake up. He would have fought against everything and everyone just to be able to ignore the world. Nothing about this day seemed right and if he could, he would just go back in time and erase it completely.

Yes, if he could, he would do everything all over again. He wouldn't have been late. He wouldn't have fought with Liz. She wouldn't have asked him for a divorce. He wouldn't have insulted and hurt her. And she would definitely not have been here, so close and yet so far away. She was still there, holding on, he knew that, he held on to that himself, but it was not enough.

If he could, if he was given a second chance, he would make things right, before it was too late. Nothing seemed to matter more than that and it was certainly the only thing that kept him still going right at that instant. Making things right with Liz as soon as she would wake up. Telling her, showing her how he felt, what he wanted.

His breathing less erratic now, he fished into his pocket for his phone, hoping to find a message from Michael, his parents, anyone who could inform him about Janelle's whereabouts, and he had to use all of his willpower to not throw his cell away in rage when he turned it on and after the few seconds it normally took for it to connect, he didn't hear the usual jingle tone that should have signaled a new message.

Nothing. Nothing at all, he was just as in the dark about her as he had been hours ago, ever since Michael had left.

Quickly dialing his cell number, he cursed loudly when all he got was his voice mail, knowing that his prayers wouldn't be heard yet. And why even bother leaving a message? It wouldn't help.

A second call to his parents resulted to be as unsuccessful, only succeeding in leaving him even more frustrated in fact and for the umpteenth time, he wondered where the hell they could have gone? Was he going to have to worry about them as well? This was certainly the last thing he needed and he would just go and hang himself to the nearest tree if he had to deal with another mysterious disappearance in his family.

"Mom, Dad… it's me… Max… call me back as soon as you get this message!… it's… it's important!" he drawled out tiredly, swearing inwardly that the first thing he would do as soon as he would get a chance would be to invest in a cell phone for his father, like it or not. His mother didn't understand those 'damned' things like she said, but his father was just against new technologies, and even more against anything that could allow anyone to locate him when he clearly didn't want to be joined.

Well, he would have to get used to it because after tonight, he would just show him the usefulness of such devices and that even if he had to resort to violence and knock it into his head.

Defeated and more depressed than ever, he turned around and was ready to switch his phone off once more before entering back, when it rang unexpectedly, all but startling him and forcing him to take a step back.

"Mom?" Max asked into the phone before he even looked at the ID of the caller, sure that it was his parents finally calling him back, and hoping against all hope that they would have some good news for him.

"No, it's not your mom, you… you bastard!" an angry voice boomed along the line and the second he recognized it, Max felt his head start spinning and his heart stop altogether.

It couldn't be! It just couldn't be! he thought, feeling suddenly dizzy and consequently stumbling backward, the only thing that stopped him from falling flat on his ass from the shock being the wall he connected with.

Oh. God. What the…

"L-Liz?" he choked on the name, thinking that he had finally lost it completely and that he was simply imagining things, because clearly this just couldn't be real, but still, even as he heard her curse his name all the way to hell, he found himself hoping this was true nonetheless. "Oh, god… Liz, a-are you okay? Where… god, where are you?"

"Where am I? Where am I?… are you kidding me? … where the hell are you? … no, forget it… I perfectly know where you are!" Liz cried out, not believing for a second that he could have the nerve to look surprised to hear her, or act like she had been the one disappearing on him.

That asshole! Oh, but she would show him, and no later than right now.

"Liz… wait… " Max stuttered, his mind trying to process what was happening, but though his brain was working at a furious rate, it just didn't make any sense to him.

How could Liz be calling him from… home? he realized as he pulled the phone off his ear and took a quick look at the small screen where the word was still visible. How could he just be talking to her right now, when not five minutes ago she had still been lying on an operating table for all he knew and he had been praying for some kind of miracle? How the hell could this happen? He was going crazy, that was the only explanation he could come up with. Or at least it seemed to be the most logical.

"No… you listen to me, Maxwell Evans and listen to me good… you can treat me like crap if you want and whenever you want, you can stomp on my feelings and not care in the least for all I care… but I will be damned if I let you hurt your daughter without saying a thing!… from now on…" Liz intoned, fuming from the inside out when she realized that Max was probably going to try to serve her some stupid excuse to calm her down and wasn't even going to take his responsibilities, but he was seriously deluding himself if he thought that he was going to get out of this one that easily.

Liz could tolerate about anything he could throw at her. She could overlook anything he could do to her, even when it hurt like hell, because she knew she had no choice, she couldn't force him to love her if he didn't want to, or just simply didn't feel it anymore, but she would kill him first before allowing him to hurt her daughter just because he had suddenly decided that Tess Harding was more important to him than anyone else. Well, if his own daughter couldn't mean more to him than his blonde bitch, she would make things easy for him and he wouldn't have to worry about having to make a choice any longer. But he could rest assure that whatever it took, she would protect Janelle. At all costs, and against anyone. Even the man who had helped to bring her to this world.

"No, Liz… wait, wait… just l-listen to me, please!… you don't understand… I-I thought… oh, god, they s-said…" Max tried in vain to explain her what had happened, even if he didn't understand everything that was occurring himself actually, but obviously Liz was in no fit state to hear him out.

And if he hadn't understood why she seemed to be so upset at first, after remembering that had all this not happened he should have been with Janelle at home hours ago for their movies night, now he perfectly could. Only Janelle's well-being could put Liz in such a state, and he loved her even more for that, but god, couldn't she see that none of this was his fault? That he had never meant to let them down, and that only a couple of hours ago actually, he had been in the pit of despair himself and had been sure he would just die if he couldn't be with her and Janelle very soon. Of course, he would have rather been with them than having to go through that!

"Oh, I understand alright… I understand that Janelle cried herself to sleep because you broke your promise to her… and I understand that I was the one who had to be there for her and comfort her… I had to lie to her because of you and you know how much I hate that… god, I'm so fed up with this… she doesn't deserve this, Max… you had no right to just… to… god… " Liz cut him off once more, growing more infuriated the more she had to hear his voice, the pain she could clearly distinguish in it actually only serving to fuel her anger even more.

Pain was not an emotion she could understand right now. Not coming from him at least. What gave him the right to act like he could share, or understand what she felt herself? What gave him the right to sound like his own world was slowly collapsing around him, or he regretted everything he had done so far?

Well, whatever it was, it was too late anyway, buddy. He should have thought about the consequences of his actions before, now the only thing she wanted was to make him hurt, just like he had hurt her baby girl.

Just thinking back to her now, was enough to make her want to cry herself. Having to witness how her bottom lip had started to tremble and her eyes to mist when she had understood that Max wouldn't come tonight had nearly broken Liz's heart, but when she had finally broken down in tears, begging her to call her daddy and tell him to come right then because she wouldn't go to bed before having seen him, Liz had known that she wouldn't be able to forgive him this time. It had happened too many times with her, there had been too many overrun meetings, too many last-minute hitches that had forced him to cancel or postpone whatever plans they could have had together, she wouldn't let him do the same thing to her daughter now.

Of course, if she stopped long enough to think about what had really put her in such a state of rage, she would realize immediately that she was partly being unfair and it was just her own hurt and jealousy talking, but then she knew that she would just collapse and cry until she would have no tears left. Being angry seemed to be easier then, even if it wouldn't stop her from feeling betrayed, or like her world had finally and definitely fallen apart.

She didn't know how long exactly Tess Harding had been living with Max, if that was what it was, but what was sure was that he had certainly not wasted any time to invite her over. It was only this morning that she had expressed her intention to get a divorce and tonight she was over there, already answering the phone like it was her home, so she doubted that this had been a one time occurrence, even if she had never gotten her on line before, at least not at Isabel's. What hurt most though, was the thought that Max had been there, too, but had obviously been too busy to take the call himself and it wasn't that hard to imagine what they had been doing then, since Tess had clearly seemed out of breath when she had answered.

No matter how much the concept of him that way, with her, repulsed her, it seemed all too evident to her that while she was struggling to put Janelle to bed and coming up with any kind of excuses to defend him and justify his absence, he had just been fucking Tess Harding without another care in the world. They had probably been celebrating the fact that he would be a free man very soon, their enthusiasm over the news making him forget everything about her, but what was worse in Liz's eyes, everything about his own daughter. And God, how she hated him for that.

"Liz… it's not what you think, okay… I-I'm coming and I will explain… " running out of patience, Max only saw that solution to stop her in her rant. Maybe if he was in front of her, he could calm her down and make her understand that this was only one huge misunderstanding. One more in the long list they already had on their favor obviously.

"You what? Oh, no… I don't think so! You're not setting foot into this house… " Liz shrieked upon hearing him, swearing that she would just wreck his neck the next time she would see him.

Did he really think that he could screw up like this and then just come and see her with a big smile, act like nothing at all, and that was just it? He obviously hadn't realized yet just how much he had hurt them both, and was seriously misjudging just how thoroughly pissed she was right now if he actually truly believed that.

"Liz… please… wake up Janelle … I'll be there in fifteen minutes!" Max sighed and said more firmly this time, knowing by experience that it was no use trying to discuss with her when she was like that anyway.

Besides, he needed to see his daughter. He needed to see for himself that she was alright. And god, more than anything he needed to see Liz, because though he could hear her now, his heart wouldn't stop beating so erratically until she would be just in front of him and he would make sure that everything was really alright with her.

"Have you lost your freaking mind? … do you know what time it is?… I don't care what your excuse is this time… you're not seeing her tonight… and if it depended only on me… believe me, Max, you wouldn't see her ever ag-…" Liz hissed heatedly, her body trembling from the fury that was unfurling inside of her, but before she could complete her threat -threat that she knew very well she would have regretted afterwards anyway- she heard a siren in the background and she was stopped dead in her tracks.

"M-Max, where a-are you?" she asked after a few seconds, her voice quivering in sudden dread when she heard someone yell a 'get out of the way', very close from where Max obviously stood.

"Cedars Sinai Hospital!" Max revealed, and he could almost instantly feel the change in her, her sharp intake of breath carrying over the line and tugging at his heart.

"You?… oh, god! … what are you doing there, Max?… a-are you alright? … what happened? Oh, god, baby, are y-you hurt?… did s-something… " Liz rushed out in one breath, a hand on her heart, the only thought still running through her head being that something could be wrong with him, and not once did she notice the tenderness and concern in her tone, or the fact that she was speaking to him again like nothing had ever happened between them, or like she had not been ready to end off his life not two minutes ago.

It didn't seem to matter anymore because at that moment, she could swear that her heart had just stopped mid-beat from the fear she felt and just like that, she was drained of all her righteous anger and indignation.

"No, no… I-I'm fine… it's a long story, and I'll explain everything, I promise… but please… I n-need to see the two of you… L-Liz… I-I can't tell you more right now… but if-if the eleven years we've loved each other still mean anything to you, do what I'm asking you, please… wake up our daughter and wait for me, okay?" Max pleaded with her in a long tortured whisper, very close to losing it again.

It seemed to him like this day from hell would never end, and he could feel the tears burning his eyes again. God, the only thing he wanted was to sit down with his daughter and wife and forget that it had happened at all, was that still too much to ask after everything he had already gone through?

"Liz?" he softly called her name when she failed to answer, and for a fleeting second, he even wondered if she hadn't hung up on him, or just dropped off the phone.

"Y-Yeah… I… o-okay!" Liz answered in a sob, a thousand of possibilities already filling her mind and though she could hear the tears in her own voice, she didn't care right now.

She had been so angry with him that she hadn't even stopped to think that anything could have happened to him, but now, just the thought was enough to rack her body with uncontrollable tremors and she wasn’t even surprised when she found herself on her knees on the floor before she could even realize that she was falling.

"Liz, baby, I'm fine, really… I'm on my way, okay? I'll be there soon!" Max whispered soothingly, hoping he could take her in his arms already, because at that moment he was convinced that she probably needed it as much as he did himself.

He wouldn't analyze what it meant for now though, but he would lie if he said that her reaction didn't fill him with hope. He couldn't help thinking that if she seemed to be so affected, maybe it meant that she still cared for him enough for them to pick up the pieces of their relationship and still have a chance to save whatever was left of their marriage.

"Y-Yes… I'll... we'll be waiting!" she managed to breathe out, wishing herself that he could already be there as well.

She didn't think she would be able to breathe properly until she would have him just in front of her and made sure whatever had happened to him was nothing bad. He sounded okay as far as she could tell, but she needed more than the soft sound of his voice for reassurance.

"Thank you!" he expelled, closing his eyes in relief, grateful that she wouldn't keep fighting him, at least for now.

Silence stretched between them after that, the only sound on the line suddenly being the sound of each other's breathing, both knowing that they should hang up already but none of them really wanting to. Until Max was eventually ready to make that decision, yet before he could, Liz called his name and he found himself listening attentively again.

"Max?" her voice was soft, hesitant even, but at the same time Max could swear he heard the desperation in her tone as well, although he didn't know what to make of it.

"Yes?" he waited with bated breath, wondering what could be so important now that she couldn't wait for him to arrive to tell him so.

'I love you!', the words burned her throat and more than anything ,she wished she could say them out loud because despite everything, there was probably not a moment she meant them more than this one, she realized, but somehow she restrained herself, convinced that this was probably not something that he wanted to hear anymore. That and the fact that she really didn't know how she would react if he rejected them, rejected her, or simply told her that he didn't know what to say to her in return.

"Hurry!" she said instead, knowing that she was being a coward again, but thinking that it wasn't as if she still had a choice anyway. Telling him how she felt would certainly not do them any good, or change anything, so why bother in the end?

"Yeah!" Max answered simply before hanging up, but something deep down inside told him that that had not been the first thing she had had in mind. He could be wrong, but she had just taken too long to tell him such a simple thing as this. He didn't have time to think too much about that though. Not now.

On unsteady feet, he half-walked, half-jogged to his car, caught between the desire to yell in relief and the urgent need to cry. Liz and Janelle were okay, that was the only thing that was still running through his head, and he needed to get to them as fast as possible.

Part of him was of course wondering how in the hell this could have happened, how he could have received a call from the hospital telling him that his wife was all but dying in there and then that his daughter was nowhere to be found when they were all clearly mistaken, but the biggest part of him was just too grateful nothing had really happened to them to truly question his luck.

There had to be an explanation, and whatever it was, he was sure that sooner or later he would learn the truth, but that wasn't his main preoccupation right this second. No, right now what he wanted was to get into his car and arrive in one piece so he could be with his family at last.

Just as he was opening his car door, another vehicle parked just beside his and in a reflexive move, he turned back to it, only to stop momentarily dead in his tracks when he recognized Michael's car.

Seeing him getting out of it, it didn't take him long to analyze the expression on his face. Wherever Michael had gone, he hadn't been able to find Janelle -which was normal since she had most likely been home all this time- and it was all too clear to him that he was wondering how in the world he was going to be able to break the news to him. But thank God, it didn't matter anymore.

Taking uncertain steps toward Max, Michael cringed inwardly with the prospect of what he was about to do. How was he supposed to look at Max in the eyes and tell him, hey, I'm sorry, but I still don't know where your baby is!. He had gone to every possible hospital he knew of in the city, to every clinic and still his search had been fruitless, and he knew all too well that it would break Max's heart to hear so. Even if in a way it could be a good thing since it pointed more and more to the fact that Janelle had not been with Liz in the car when the accident had happened, he didn't think that it would be of any comfort to Max. Nothing would until he would have his daughter safely tucked in his arms.

"I'm sorry… I… " Michael stammered helplessly and held out the agenda he had taken from Max's office for all explanation.

Well, he had never been good with words, that was for sure, and he was proving it once more, but he knew that Max would understand what this meant without him needing to utter them this time. He also knew that despite everything, Max would know that he had done his best nonetheless. Or so he hoped.

"Oh… uh… thanks, but I won't need it… I-I need to go!" Max grabbed for it and stuttered himself, the need to leave being greater than the need to explain everything to Michael right now.

"What?… What the hell is happening, Max? Where are you going?" Michael asked bewildered, noticing for the first time that it was actually weird that Max had been in the parking lot himself.

Looking at him intently now, that was when Michael realized that Max had his keys in hands and looked really serious about leaving. He would have probably done so already even, if he hadn't arrived at that moment and he couldn't help but frown in worry, thinking that his friend had finally lost it for good.

"Home!" Max just said, feeling a strange sense of peace and relief as he uttered the word.

Yeah, home was wherever Liz and Janelle were, and that was where he needed to be.

"Home?" Michael parroted in disbelief, sure now that he had missed something big since he had left because this didn't make any sense at all to him. "But what if something happens with Liz? What if… " he queried, growing more confused by the second. Surely Max wouldn't leave now, not when he had been making himself miserable before because he didn't want to have to choose between Liz and Janelle. There had to be some kind of explanation, of course.

Oh, God. What if Liz… no, no… he wouldn't let himself think of that. It was not possible. Besides, Max wouldn't look so calm if he had just… god, lost his wife. Just thinking about it, even only for a second was enough to put him in a cold sweat, so he could only imagine how Max would have reacted himself if it were that.

"It-It's not her, Michael!" Max breathed out, still having a hard time believing it himself.

"WHAT? What are you talking about?" Michael cried out, sure that he had heard him wrong, or just not understood the words.

What did that mean, it's not her? Of course it was her, Michael knew that Max had been given her wallet almost as soon as he had arrived, so it had to be her. Not that he didn't want what Max was telling him to be true, but still, it seemed impossible.

"Liz… sh-she's home with Janelle, she's okay! Janelle is, too!… and I-I'm going to see them!" Max continued, not surprised to see his friend looking at him like he had just lost his mind.

"But how? How is it possible?!… Max, what's happening here?" Michael demanded more forcefully now, thinking that soon he would be the one needing to be sedated, or downright locked away in a loony bin if someone didn't start explaining this to him, and fast.

"I don't know! … and I-I don’t care either way… she's alright, Mike, they both are… that's all that matters to me right now!" Max replied, voice cracking slightly, the fact to say it out loud helping him to realize the full impact of what it meant. His girls were alright. There were home, and they were perfectly safe.

"Okay, okay… but what about that woman in there? Who is she if it's not Liz?" Michael tried to rationalize, wanting more than anything to believe what Max was saying, but there was still too many incoherencies in this.

"I-I don't know… and I don’t know how she had Liz's papers with her either but it's not her!… I need to go now!" Max rushed out, clearly getting impatient now.

Of course he understood Michael's need to question all this, and he would do the same if he didn't have more important things to think and care about. Like getting the hell out of there as fast as he could, if only he would let him.

"Okay… I-I'm coming with you then!" Michael proposed before realizing that that was maybe not what Max wanted or needed right now.

"No, Michael… that's not necessary… besides, someone needs to tell them it's not Liz… they need to find out who that woman is… she must have a family, too, and they need to know!" Max countered, not meaning to sound rude or ungrateful, because truly he would probably never be able to repay Michael for everything he had done for him today, but as selfish as it sounded considering how he had helped him, he wanted to be alone with the two loves of his life nonetheless.

"Right, right… okay… I'll tell them… but Max, be careful… I know you want to see Liz and your daughter but drive safely, don’t go and kill yourself now, okay?" Michael relented easily, understanding right away what Max wasn't telling him, but that didn't stop him from making sure that Max wouldn't do anything crazy now that he knew where to find his family.

Nonetheless, he was right. Whoever that woman was, someone might have noticed her disappearance and he didn't doubt that they had to be worried sick about her. It seemed just so crazy that she had been there all along and no one had been able to realize that she wasn't Liz.

"I won't!" Max promised immediately, and for the first time of the night Michael was happy to see a smile on his face. It was still hesitant, like he was afraid to rejoice over the turn of events just too soon, but it was a smile nevertheless. "Thank you, Michael… for everything!" he then added and before he could react, Michael found himself engulfed in a manly hug.

"Anytime… now go, Max… your family is waiting for you!… and… " he answered, patting Max's back before pulling away and meeting his eyes with much seriousness. "… and tell Liz how you really feel, okay? … you won't be always as lucky Max, and you don't know what could happen to any of you, life is short… you've seen that today… so don't wait any longer and make things right with your wife!" he advised, still convinced that despite everything that had obviously torn them apart, if there was anyone that had enough love to go through anything, Max and Liz were those people. They just needed to sit down and talk, really talk to each other.

"Believe me, that's exactly what I plan to do!" Max affirmed, swearing to himself that after this night, he wouldn't let the chance to patch things up with Liz pass him by ever again. No, whatever it took, he wouldn't go through another day without her or his daughter. She had loved him once, he would make sure she would love him again.

"I hope to not see you later then!" Michael said simply, hoping that the next time he would see Max at his apartment, it would be to come and pick up his things and haul his ass back home. Where he belonged.

"Yeah… bye, Mike!" Max said and almost without delay got into his car, not waiting a second longer to crank up the ignition and get out of there.

"Bye." Michael replied, even if he knew Max wouldn't hear it.

As he saw him pulling off his parking spot, he sincerely wished that everything would go alright for Max and that this night would help him, as well as Liz, to understand how much they still meant to each other, and therefore work their way to a reconciliation.
~ * ~
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Sat Jan 05, 2008 6:11 am, edited 3 times in total.
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RebeccaBehrEvans
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Post by RebeccaBehrEvans »

~ * ~
Her gaze drifted to the mural clock once more and she frowned when she realized that only two minutes had passed since the last time she had looked.

Fourteen minutes. It had already been fourteen minutes since she had woken Janelle up and settled down with her on the living room couch, and Max wasn't here yet.

She did her best to keep her cool and maintain her composure of course, but the more seconds chimed out, the less she managed to act the part and feign that it wasn't eating her up inside to not know what was happening with Max.

She had thought that the first minutes had been the worst, when she had had to pull herself up and find the strength to reach the stairs, but this now was actually pure torture.

Janelle, wrapped in the soft blanket Liz had draped around her when she had all but extracted her out of her bed before she was even really awake, squirmed on her lap and she forced an apologetic smile on her face when she pointed out to her that she had stopped mid-sentence. Not wanting to worry her, she resumed her task, having decided on reading her a story while they waited for Max, but her voice sounded hollow and strained even to her own ears. She just hoped that Janelle was tired enough to not notice.

Fact was, she couldn't help herself. No matter how hard she tried, her thoughts kept drifting back to the same and only thing. Max. Their relationship. What was going to happen now.

When she had woken her, Janelle had been clearly disoriented and had it not been for the situation, Liz would have probably rolled her eyes, or just smiled knowingly when the first thing she had whispered upon opening her eyes had been a soft 'daddy?', like even in her sleep she had still been thinking and dreaming of her father, or something and had hoped that he would come and wake her up as soon as he could and that even in the middle of the night. Yet as it was, Liz had only felt her heart tightening in her chest even more as she imagined, even for a mere second, just how utterly devastated Janelle would be herself if anything was to ever happen to her daddy.

It made her feel even worse for having cursed at him like she had and she knew that she would probably never forgive herself for having been so mean and vindictive. It wasn't like her at all, and she hated herself for letting things get to her like tonight, when nothing was clear anymore in her head and she was only driven by her rage… and yeah, she could admit it, her jealousy mainly. The instant she had heard Tess answering the phone, the second she had recognized her voice and that even when she had wanted to convince herself that it could be Isabel, she had been nearly blind with it and had lost all rational thought, and now she felt stupid for her reaction.

Sure, what she knew now didn't change anything to the fact that Max was obviously with Tess, whether he was indeed living with her or not, but at least she was convinced now that all her speculations had been incorrect. Even if she didn't have all the facts yet, it seemed evident that Max had not spent the evening with her like she had wrongly assumed, and well, it was always better than nothing at all, wasn't it?

It didn't mean that they hadn't… done… what she had supposed tonight before, they had most likely done so more times than she was willing to think about, but at least she was sure that whatever Tess had been doing at Isabel's apartment that had left her breathless had not been with Max, and what was more important even, she could tell herself that he had not traded their daughter for a session of hot sex with that two-cents-worth tramp and that was already some consolation.

The funny thing now was that she had been dreading this moment almost all day, fearing the next time she would have to face Max, because she had known that after their morning confrontation, they would have to talk and stop avoiding that famous conversation she knew they would have had to have sooner or later, but now she couldn't wait for him to arrive, no matter the consequences, or where it would lead them.

She needed to see him, to be near him, more than she could need anything else at that instant, and however scary that actually was, she couldn't deny it.
*
For Max, the twenty minutes or so it took him to go from the hospital to his house had to be the longest of his life, and it was nothing short of a miracle if he had managed to arrive without causing an accident himself. He had been extra careful of course, or as much as he could considering his state, but he couldn't get there fast enough and consequently had surely not respected many driving laws.

He didn't even take the time to park his car properly in the driveway and before he had even cut the ignition, his lights were already off and his door already opened. It wasn't until he was directly before the front door in fact that he hesitated briefly.

A very small part of him was still afraid that this was not real, that somehow he had imagined that whole phone call and that Liz was still being tended at the hospital while Janelle was yet crying somewhere for her daddy, and it made opening the door all the more difficult.

What if nothing was true? What if he had only been deluding himself once more? What if he tried to open that door, only to find it locked? What if he called for them and no one answered? He honestly didn't think that he would survive it and yet, there was only one way to know for sure.

As he reached for the doorknob, he wasn't even utterly surprised to see how much his hand was shaking, nor was he to realize that his feet were barely carrying him at all, but when he reached the living room entrance, he had to wonder how it was still possible for him to be still standing up and not have collapsed and cried already.

He felt himself sway sideway nonetheless and he knew that, weren't it for the room separation, he would most likely be sprawled on the floor by now, but he didn't have time to be grateful for the fact.

The scene just in front of him nearly took his breath away and he could swear he felt his heart pounding in his throat now. Sitting on the couch was Liz, alive and safe, their daughter cradled securely in her arms, while she read to her one of those fairytales she loved so much and it took all of his willpower to not just run to them and take them in his arms to never let go.

He couldn't move however, couldn't even take a small step in their direction, so afraid he was they would just disappear if he tried to approach them and so instead, he just feasted upon them from a distance, at least while they had still not noticed his presence. It also gave him some time to pull himself together, because at that instant he was clearly a mess and the last thing he wanted was for Janelle to see him like this.

The only light in the room was coming from the small lamp near them and the few candles Liz had lit here and there, over the bar counter behind them and the mantelpiece, but it was enough for him to distinguish their forms clearly and even if Janelle was actually facing the other way and he was only presented with Liz's profile, he could perfectly enjoy every expression on her face as she kept reading and his heart burst with love and joy at seeing her at last.

She was free of any makeup as far as he could tell, her hair was loose and she wore a simple sleeveless top with some sweatpants but god, she had never looked more beautiful to him than at that second, and his insides twisted at the sight of her. To think that he could have missed all this, that the two people that meant the more to him in this world could have been taken away from him was just unbearable. No, he would just die if that ever happened.

"How are we going to name him?" he heard Liz say, her voice hoarser as she was obviously trying to impersonate a man.

"Can I choose mommy?" Janelle's voice resonated into the room for the first time since he had arrived, interrupting Liz with one of the many questions she often asked when they read to her, and Max had to clamp his hands over his mouth to not cry out at the wave of emotions that crashed over him at finally hearing her and seeing for himself that she was okay.

"Sure, how would you like to name him if you could?" Liz asked, tearing her eyes from the book briefly to direct all of her attention to their daughter.

"Maxwell? Can we call him Maxwell like my daddy?" Janelle demanded and Max immediately felt his eyes brimming with tears.

"Yeah… Maxwell, that's a beautiful name your daddy have!" Liz replied softly and it was the tenderness with which she spoke the words that nearly brought him to his knees.

A small whining sound escaped his lips and the next second Liz's gaze drifted to him and he forgot how to breathe, or what he was supposed to do now.

Their eyes met and locked very briefly but all too soon, Liz's attention was apparently diverted by his appearance and he clearly saw her eyes widen in shock when they settled first on his bandaged hand and soon after she saw the blood on his shirt, confirming to her that he had indeed been hurt.

She gaped at him and after he followed her gaze, Max immediately pulled at the lapels of his jacket to cover the stains and not scare his daughter, before shaking his head imperceptibly in hopes that Liz would not comment and keep acting naturally. Fortunately, Janelle had obviously not seen him yet and it was clearly better this way.

"Sweetie, look who's here to see you!" swallowing past the huge lump in her throat, Liz somehow managed to concentrate on her daughter, but there was no saying how hard it was to not just go to him and run her hands all over his body to make sure he wasn't badly hurt. It was actually only the thought of Janelle and how much it would certainly panic her if she did so that stopped her.

The instant Janelle turned around and noticed him standing there, she squealed loudly and Max was sure there couldn't be a more beautiful sound in this world. Liz scooped her up into her arms, not even paying attention to the blanket that fell unnoticed on the floor as she took the first steps towards him, but still Max couldn't help but think she was moving definitely too slow for him.

When they finally were within reach, Janelle stretched out her hands to him and he couldn't pick her up fast enough.

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry, sweetie!" Max whispered achingly the instant he had her in his arms, stroking her hair tenderly, like he needed the soft contact to make sure this was really happening, to convince himself that he was really holding her after everything. "God, I love you so much!"

" 'S 'kay, daddy… I'm no mad!" Janelle answered just as softly, her tiny arms coming around her father's neck and hugging him tightly, too little yet to make too much sense of Max's distress. She couldn't stay mad very long with him anyway, no matter what he did, she loved him too much for that.

Liz was another story however, and she couldn't help growing more and more worried the more she looked at him. The way he nearly crushed Janelle to him, his closed eyes, the tears that prickled his eyelashes were enough to make her tremble in apprehension.

"Max? What happened to you?" she demanded when she saw him holding their daughter like she was his lifeline and he was afraid she would be taken away from him if he let go.

Whatever had happened to him, it had to be something big because she didn't think she had ever seen him so scared to lose his daughter, and even if she couldn't understand why that would be, she clearly recognized that it could only be that that made him react so out of character.

"Not now, Liz, please… I just want to spend some time with my baby!" Max replied, his eyes now fixed on his daughter and looking at her with so much love, it made Liz ache inside at the sight.

Feeling like she wasn't even welcome in this little reunion, most of all because Max didn't seem to want to include her, she took a step back, ready to leave them alone if that was what he needed, no matter how much it hurt, but before she could go further, Max's hand on her hip stopped her.

"No!… stay!" he hissed in an urgent whisper, forgetting for a moment that he could startle Janelle, his fingers all but digging into the flesh of her side in a desperate attempt to prevent her from leaving him, but though Liz was clearly shocked by the unexpected gesture, it was the unconcealed anguish in his gaze that really was her undoing.

His eyes bored into hers then, saying so much more than those two simple words, expressing so many emotions, and she was unable to look away. For a short instant, everything else ceased to exist and she got lost again in his amazing eyes, like she had so many times before. There was nothing else but the way he looked at her. Nothing else that mattered, nothing else that made sense.

He was looking at her like she… God, could it be?… she wondered, but as quickly as it had happened, their staring contest was cut short and she found herself questioning everything again.

"I'm no baby anymore!" Janelle interrupted sleepily, drawing Max's attention from Liz to her, at least briefly, and despite how serious they had both been not a minute ago, Max and Liz couldn't help but smile at her stubbornness. Even when she was visibly only a blinking of eyelashes away from falling asleep, she had to act like the grownup girl she clearly wasn't yet.

"Honey… you'll always be my baby, whether you like it or not!" Max told her, holding her higher on his hip and caressing her face lovingly. Yes, she would always be his little girl. "I'm going to get her to sleep again… and then we'll talk, okay?" he then turned back to Liz and said to her when he saw Janelle failing to stifle a yawn.

Of course he knew that this was his fault and that he shouldn't have made Liz wake her up, but there would have been no way he would have been satisfied with just looking at her while she slept. More than anything he had needed to hold her in his arms, to hear her voice, anything that could make her feel more alive than ever to him.

"But Max… " Liz protested, not understanding why it had been so important for Max to have Janelle awake when he arrived, to actually have them both waiting for him, if in the end he was just going to put her back to bed almost as fast as she had gotten her out. God, his attitude didn't make any sense at all to her.

"Please!" Max breathed out softly, his eyes pleading with her to not force him to relive the horror of this night just yet.

No, now what he really wanted was to make the most of every second he could spend with them before the hard reality of their situation came crashing down on him again.

Liz didn't seem to understand his need however, maybe because nothing about this night or about his behavior still fitted together to her so far, but as he sensed her ready to object with him again, Max let himself forget for a second that nothing had been solved between them yet and instead, he closed the short distance that separated him from her and cupped her cheek in one hand, silencing her the only way he knew how.

The kiss was unexpected and brief, barely a repetitive brush of lips together, but it was enough for Liz to feel it all the way down to her toes. It had been so long since she had felt the contact of his lips against her own, it suddenly seemed surreal to be able to feel them again. In fact, she could have easily believed she had dreamt him, dreamt that kiss, if it weren't for the fact that when she opened her eyes again, Max was still there, his forehead resting against her own and looking down at her with that something in his own eyes that let her know he had felt the same way.

Suddenly feeling overwhelmed, Liz couldn't help her reaction and she berated herself when she felt her eyes misting over, hence showing Max once more how weak she could be when it came to him.

When the first tear rolled down her cheek however, Max was faster and quickly wiped it away with his thumb before Liz could herself, but the soft contact was enough to make her breath catch in her throat.

Everything was just happening so fast. First she was ready to swear that she hated him, but forgot everything about that the second she feared for his life, then he was here, kissing her, comforting her, almost succeeding in erasing all the hurt he had caused with a short caress of his lips, a soft touch of his hand. How on Earth was she supposed to control herself when he did things like that? She just couldn't, and even less with his next action.

"I'm fine… we're fine, Liz!" Max whispered as he threaded his fingers into her hair and then cupped the back of her head to pull her to him, closing his eyes to avoid crying himself when he finally felt his two loves in his arms again.

Of its own volition, one of Liz's arms found its way under Max's jacket, circling around his waist, and she fisted his shirt in her hand, clinging to him despite herself and wishing he would never let her go.

The last thing she wanted of course was to get her hopes up and then see them being reduced to ashes in the end, but as she buried her face into his chest and heard his soft words, she couldn't help wondering if there wasn't a double meaning to them. She prayed that there was more to them than what she heard in fact, because she wasn't sure how much longer she could go on like this before she lost it completely.

"Shh, don't cry, Liz… please, don't… " Max murmured against her ear, having a hard time not doing so himself, even though he couldn't even say why she was actually crying.

Was it because he had scared her? Was it because of what he had just done? Honestly, he didn't really feel like questioning it, as long as she stayed in his arms, but fact was that he could not stand to see her so upset. He never could and now was no different, no matter how enjoyable feeling her against him actually was.

"Baby, it's okay… shh…" he continued, his lips grazing her temple as he spoke, trying to comfort her as best as he could, even if by the way she was trembling in his arms, he could see it was clearly not working.

The more he tried to reassure her in fact, the more Liz felt like crying and never stopping, and she turned her head into his shoulder so that Janelle wouldn't witness her breaking down and worry about her reaction.

His hand caressed the nape of her neck and Liz gulped for air, willing herself to calm down but failing miserably. Of course she was grateful for what he was trying to do, but right now the kind of help he offered was more than she could take. It was a combination of things in fact, the way he held her, the way he talked to her, the way he stroked her skin, only reminding her of all the tender gestures he used to have when they were still close, or after they had just made love mostly, when he was trying to calm her down or help them relax and unfortunately, it only made her want to cry more for what was no longer.

As if sensing somehow intuitively that her parents needed this, Janelle just rested her head against her father's shoulder and didn't make a noise, but nonetheless Max couldn't help but worry for her. He knew just how in tune she usually could be with Liz's feelings and the last thing he needed was to have her breaking down in tears as well. It was hard enough seeing Liz like that, he would surely join in the fun if his daughter started, too.

"Liz… calm down… you're gonna scare Jay…" Max remarked but so softly, she was the only one to hear him.

Of course there was no saying how much he wanted to put Janelle down on the floor and engulf her completely in his arms instead, but he needed the contact with his daughter as much as he needed it with her, and right now it seemed impossible to let go of any of them or make such choice.

He felt Liz nod against his shoulder almost immediately then, but when she still didn't move or release her hold on him, he kept whispering sweet nothings into her ear and running his fingers at the base of her head in an attempt to help her.

It took her a little while but eventually, her breathing became less shallow and she managed to pull herself together, even if she was convinced that it was going to be short-lived. Something told her that this was going to be a very emotional night and that this was actually only the beginning.

Still looking the other way, she quickly brushed away the last of her tears, and only when she was sure that she didn't look like a nervous wreck anymore, or at the very least was presentable enough to not alarm her daughter, did she turn back to both Max and Janelle.

The instant she met Max's eyes however and she felt him lovingly tracing her cheekbone with his thumb, her chin started quivering again, and she quickly lowered her gaze once more. Sensing this, Max didn't force her to look up but just kissed her forehead tenderly before wrapping his arms completely around their child.

"I'll be back in no time, okay? Everything's gonna be alright!" Max promised then, and at that moment Liz didn't know how it was still possible or why, but she believed him, she really did, and she knew that one way or another, they actually would be fine.

She watched him climb the stairs with Janelle in his arms, without saying another word, but she couldn't miss just how he still clung to her, and when they both turned to her one last time and Janelle wished her goodnight and blew her a kiss, it took all of her willpower to swallow back the sob that threatened to spill from her lips. She waved back to her and even smiled back to Max when he did, but there was no saying how hard just doing so and pretending everything was alright was, even for her daughter's sake.

The last thing she heard then before they disappeared from her sight was Janelle's giggles, but even those didn't appease her heart and the second she was sure they couldn't see her anymore either, she walked back to the couch and collapsed on it, her knees finally giving out under her.
*
"Daddy… you're squeeeezing me!" Janelle cried out overdramatically as they reached the first floor, but even as she writhed in his arms, Max could tell that she didn't mind that much.

"Sorry, sweetheart… it's just that I missed you so much!" Max told her, loosening his grip on her nonetheless. The last thing he wanted was to hurt her in any way of course.

"You saw me this morning!" she answered with an exaggerated roll of her eyes, like Max had just said the stupidest thing in the world. Yet she had to admit that she had missed him, too. Very much in fact.

"True… but I missed my little Princess nonetheless!" Max conceded, before adding tenderly.

"You're silly, daddy… I'm no Princess!" Janelle giggled and refuted, even if she really liked when he called her his Princess.

"To me you are, sweetie!" Max insisted, pecking her cheek as he spoke the words, knowing that she was still too young to understand that she was even more than that to him.

She and Liz were his life, and he knew all too well that he would be completely lost without them. If he hadn't already gotten that before, after tonight he couldn't have any doubts.

"Is mommy a Princess, too?" Janelle asked innocently, resting her head against her father's shoulder again, when Max started to stroke her back in slow gentle circles that usually always managed to appease her.

"Nope… your mommy would be a Queen!" Max answered, thinking that she was definitely the Queen of his heart. The only woman he had ever loved, and tonight, he had every intention to remind her of that.

"Then you're a King, right?"

"I guess, yeah!" Max shrugged and said, wondering if this was supposed to lead them somewhere. Obviously not, judging by her next question and the easiness with which she changed the subject.

"You kissed mommy!" Janelle asked out of the blue, the playful smile in her voice impossible to miss, even if he couldn't clearly see her face right now.

"I did, huh?" Max couldn't help but grin at that nonetheless, even if he was sure that Janelle couldn't understand just how much that had actually affected him, or why it still left him feeling all giddy inside despite the circumstances.

Truth was that though he had no idea what that would mean for Liz and him, it was definitely kind of hard to forget since his lips were still tingling from the all too brief contact. He wouldn't be able to say what came over him then, or if the moment had been well chosen or not, only the following events would tell, but he surely couldn't regret doing it.

"Why?" Janelle wondered out loud, since though it wouldn't be the first time she saw her parents kissing, she didn't think she remembered them doing so so openly in front of her, and surely not recently.

"Because I love her… just like I love you!" he told her honestly and planted fierce kisses everywhere his lips could touch, until she was again squirming in his arms and her rich childish laughter filled the place and it wasn't until she moved so much that he nearly let her go, that he stopped and looked at her more seriously again. "Mommy and I are going to make things better… I promise!" he sobered up and declared, knowing that she needed to hear the words as much as he needed to say them.

He would do anything for his daughter and he knew that she wanted them to be a real family again more than anything, but he also was well aware that he would probably not survive if he didn't manage to patch things up with Liz, so this was as vital, if not more, to him as it was to her.

"But you said som'times it's too complicated." Janelle quoted him, a little confused, since she remembered all too well their conversation from this same morning, and then she hadn't gotten the impression that her wish to see things going back to normal again would be granted any time soon.

"I also said that I wanted to try, didn't I?" Max reminded her, not the least fazed by the fact that she had obviously a hard time believing him, more over after what he had told her and tried to explain to her not twenty-four hours ago.

"Yes… but not hard enough!" she argued back, her tone not scolding or angry, but obviously disapproving, which nearly made Max chuckle out loud. God, was it really possible that she was only five years old?

"Well, I'm ready to try really, really hard now!" he countered, enunciating each word separately but putting more insistence on the ‘really’, hoping that she could understand just how serious about that he indeed was.

"And it's gonna work?" nibbling at her bottom lip hesitantly, Janelle couldn't help but ask hopefully nonetheless, her big doe eyes boring into his, and as he recognized the uncertainty in them, Max found his motivation increasing ten folds.

"I'll make it work!" he swore, gathering the confidence he could have needed from the fact that this would surely not only mean the world to him, but to his daughter as well. "I'll make it work this time, sweetheart… whatever it takes!" he reiterated once more as he clutched her to his chest, knowing that he had already not kept one promise to her today, but that he wouldn't fail to keep another.
End of chapter eight.b
TBC…

Okay… I knooooow I was definitely mean, letting you go through all this when it wasn't even true… but guess what… in the next chapter… they finally talk… well, I think :? :lol:

A big thank U to Angie and Tiph, because after ganging up on me one night on MSN, they managed to worm all the truth out of me and so knew just how evil I could be, but they didn't say anything and actually played along :lol: Love you, girls :wink: And the same goes for Dreamer_Dreaming :wink:

Tiph, the next one is for you :P … but, I swear if you comment on a certain line, I'm on the next train to Paris and you'll see me in front of your school with you know what!! :lol: I'm not sure you'll survive the humiliation so think wisely :lol:

And last thing…. AHHHHHHHHHHH, sorry I just had to let it out… I'M FREE!! No more angst for me… or at least no more real angst :lol: … see you soon with the next chapter :wink:
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Fri Jan 04, 2008 5:54 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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RebeccaBehrEvans
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Location: Like Heidi... in the green, but freaking cold mountain!!

Post by RebeccaBehrEvans »

Author: RebeccaBehrEvans

Title: Before it's too late.

Rating:ADULT

Disclaimer: Roswell is mine. Jason Behr is mine. Roswell is mine. Jason Behr is mine. :twisted: Nope, even auto-persuasion doesn't seem to work, so I guess we all know what that means. :sad:

AN: hey everyone.

Well, this is not exactly how I wanted to do this… I mean I didn't plan to cut this chapter in two parts at first :roll: ... the problem is that I'm feeling rather depressed lately, for so many reasons, and I'm having a hard time writing, but I'm feeling even worse for leaving you hanging there for so long, so I've decided that if I can't come up with what I want, and write the rest of the chapter just like I want it, I could at least give you what I already have. :?

It's been read by two of my fantastic 'story-testers' already and approved so I'm gonna trust them and believe that if I'm not satisfied with it, you'll at least find it not that bad. I know I'm gonna leave you in a bad place again, well, kind of, but it seemed like the best place to cut it without stopping in the middle of something even more important and making you hate me for that :) … I hope that you won't be too disappointed, but if you are, let me know and I'll try my best to make it up to you later :wink:

Thanks again for all your incredible feedbacks and your kind words. You don't know how important they have been for me lately :)

Well, without further ado…

Chapter nine.a
If asked later Max wouldn't be able to say how long he had been sitting there by his daughter's bed, silently observing her as she slept peacefully. Time had stopped having any meaning to him a while ago, when making sure she was alright had become the only thing that mattered.

It could be minutes like it could be hours, he really didn't care, he knew he would never tire of looking at her, lying there, her tiny chest heaving steadily with each intake of breath she took. It was as if his eyes were clearly seeing that she was there, safe and sound, but his mind still had a hard time really processing the information. Still he guessed that such reaction was pretty normal, given what he had been through. After all, a few hours ago, part of him had not even been sure he would ever see her again, or when he would if he could.

Of course he knew he should be downstairs already by now, knew that Liz was probably waiting for him to come back, but though he didn't want her to think that he was chickening out or trying to find a way to postpone their talk, letting go of Janelle right now was even harder than what he could have anticipated.

His little baby girl, Max sighed as he tenderly smoothed back a few tendrils of her hair. It still amazed him that she could have had the strength to tell him all about her day, in almost excruciating details in fact, from the incident with that Tommy boy to her late afternoon at the beach and how much fun that had been, when it was obvious that she had barely been able to keep her eyes open all through her story, but all in all he had been all too glad to listen to her and learn that she at least had had a normal day when his had been nothing but.

Not that there had ever been any doubt, but she definitely was his daughter and was as stubborn as he could be himself sometimes: he had seen that once more tonight when after she had asked him where her movie was and he had been forced to admit to her that he hadn't been able to go and get it, she had insisted and begged him to go rent it even if he had to, so they could see it before she went back to sleep.

He had chuckled softly at how cute she looked as at the same time her eyes gradually dropped she had still tried to talk him into going, but actually convincing her that that was not possible and that she would have to wait till the next day to see it had been something else.

Fortunately, it hadn't taken her so long to finally fall asleep in his arms, once he had settled down on the rocking chair they still had in her room and for once, he was almost grateful for the fact. He loved his daughter to bits but in all honesty, he hadn't known how much longer he would have been able to keep the constant smile on his face when he was still hurting so much inside and felt like any second then, he would reach his breaking point.

After a few other minutes spent hovering near her in the dark, he reluctantly sat up and after having looked at her one last time and lovingly kissed her forehead, he finally decided to make his way downstairs. He didn't doubt that what he was going to have to deal with now would be even harder and more emotionally draining for him, but he knew he had no choice.

Tonight he would face his demons and his worst fears no matter what it took, because there was no way he would go another day without knowing where he and Liz stood. Or trying to change her mind if she didn't see things his way.

His legs barely carried him to the living room, and when he reached it and he didn't see Liz right away, he instinctively walked to the bar they had on the left corner of the room, with only one thought in mind. He wasn't much of a drinker usually, and there certainly couldn't be anything strong enough right at that instant to help his case, but whisky would have to do for now.

A trembling hand reached over the counter for the bottle he knew he and Liz kept there for big occasions, and after having nearly filled a glass to the brim, he gulped the colored liquid in barely two swigs. Not surprisingly the liquor burned his throat the second he swallowed it, but he somehow managed to fight the urgent need he felt to cough.

The instant she heard the glass connect with the hard surface of the bar when he put it down, Liz sat up from her lying position on the couch and she was not only surprised to see Max already there, but clearly to notice that the first thing he had done when finally joining her was to help himself to a drink. She had been so caught up in her own thoughts that she had not even realized he was back and now she found herself frowning and wondering how long exactly he had been down.

She had gone upstairs herself when she had noticed how long he was taking with Janelle and the scene that had greeted her had almost made her burst in tears again. Max had been cradling Janelle against his chest as close as he could obviously, and they had both been talking in hushed tones while he apparently tried to rock her into sleep, and she didn't think that she could ever witness anything more beautiful than those instants between father and child.

She hadn't wanted to interrupt them though, sure somehow intuitively that Max had really needed this moment with his daughter, but there was no saying how much she had envied her at that instant and wished she could be a part of that special bond as well.

If only everything between Max and her could be as simple as his relationship with Janelle, their life would probably be much easier then. Whatever one of them did or said, there were never any angry feelings, resentment, or just any misunderstandings that lasted between them. They never hurt each other, at least not purposely, and if they ever did, a kiss and a hug was usually all it took to forgive and forget and solve the problem.

Unfortunately, it had been too long since that had been enough for them. Way too long and now she didn't know how to close the distance between them and go back to the time when they were still able to understand each other with just one look, or a single word. She wasn't even sure they would be able to work things out and that independently of the outcome of their discussion tonight, when they were barely able to look at each other when they were in the same room most of the times now.

Yet, Max had said that they needed to talk, so talk they would, even if it was to see him break her heart in the end. She was almost sure that by the end of their conversation, no matter how it went, she wouldn't have any tear left to cry but still, ultimately, she knew that they would have to go through this to finally put an end to this situation. They had been avoiding this for too long now and it hadn't solved anything nonetheless, it would be stupid to keep going on that way then, no matter how much it scared her or hurt now to take that final step.

She wasn't naïve and she knew that, despite how much she despised that thought, the chances that this talk would mean the end of their marriage were greater than the contrary, but at least after that, she would know where to go from there and maybe, just maybe, she would finally be able to move on. If not for herself, she had to at least try to do this, even if it was only for her daughter's sake, because she surely didn't deserve to have her parents at each other's throats constantly, or be so indecisive about the simplest things. In their will to protect her, they were probably only complicating her life even way more now than they would if they finally came to a decision in fact. But tonight they would, no matter what said decision would be.

As she looked at Max now, Liz couldn’t stop her stomach from churning in apprehension, but the feeling quickly changed into concern when after a few seconds, she realized that he had yet to move from his position and it looked like he wasn't even there with her, or had just noticed her presence yet. Added to the fact that Max never drank if there wasn't someone to do that with him, she was now sure that this couldn't be good in any way.

She called his name softly as she slowly stood up to her feet but he didn't seem to hear her at first, only making her anxiety grow stronger. It wasn't until she repeated it and started to move to him that he reacted. Yet when he finally turned around and their eyes met, Liz felt the air rush out of her lungs and almost wished he hadn't.

The instant he saw her, Max knew that as brave as he had been so far, he wouldn't be able to hold out any longer now, and barely a second after her name passed his lips in a broken murmur, he felt his knees finally giving out from under him as the enormity of what he had gone through in the last few hours crashed on him unexpectedly.

Liz had been expecting many things to happen, but she had never been anywhere prepared to see Max fall to his knees in front of her and start bawling like his very heart was being ripped out of his chest.

Despite everything else, there were no questions in her mind, no second thoughts. She was near him and already squatting down in front of him in a second, ready to help him in any way she could of course, but even with that, she never saw his next move coming.

The moment he saw her there, so close to him, her face only a few inches from his and calling his name with that edge on her voice, Max couldn't stop himself even if he wanted. He pulled her to him until she was straddling his lap, shocking the hell out of Liz in the process, but he wasn't able to care about that at that second.

His head against her bosom, he shook violently in her arms, holding onto her like his life depended on it, and for a while Liz was unable to do much more but stay there frozen on the spot.

Her mind worked at a furious rate, trying to find some kind of explanation to what was happening, as well as trying to understand what exactly Max was mumbling against her chest, but no matter how hard she tried she kept drawing a blank. The only thing she got more or less clearly was how many times he repeated her name and how he seemed to cry even harder with each utterance that escaped his lips, and that was what finally shook her out of her torpor.

"Max? What's wrong?" Liz asked bewildered when it didn't seem that he was going to stop any time soon, as at the same time she tried to fight as best as she could the fear that gripped at her heart at seeing him like that.

She pulled away slightly when he didn't answer her and her hands framed his face gently so he would look at her, but as strong as she wanted to be for him, she nearly cried herself when his eyes finally locked on hers.

"Baby, talk to me!" she pleaded softly, needing to know what could have put him in such a state, and was already swearing inwardly that whatever it took, she would do her best to make it better for him.

Thoughts of their probable divorce were the furthest thing from her mind at that instant and nothing mattered but Max. This was the man she loved, no matter what could have gone on between them, that fact remained true and unchanged, just like the fact that she could absolutely not bear to see him hurt in any way, whether it were physically or just emotionally.

In all the years that they had been together, Liz couldn't even remember having ever seen Max cry, except maybe when his grandmother had died a few months after their wedding, and when Janelle was born, and then those had been tears of joy he had cried. Yet none of that had ever come close to this and the sight made her heart ache painfully and her insides twist in dread.

Whatever this was this time, it had to be something dramatic and awful to have him react this way, yet she couldn't bring herself to work out any kind of scenarios, not even just in her mind. She didn’t know how she would react herself if anything had happened to his parents or his sister, or… anyone in his family in fact.

"I-I called… I c-called and no one answered… and I-I thought… n-no one answered…" Max croaked out when Liz called his name once more, but the words were barely comprehensible to her, moreover when they were disrupted by heart wrenching sobs and desperate intakes of breath.

She could clearly see how hard it was for Max to even say as much, but the little he actually told her only made her worry more since she didn't understand what, or who he was talking about. Then the instant those few words were out, he was again crying openly and clinging to her forcefully like he was afraid she would leave him there alone and Liz felt all the more terrified.

"Max, you're scaring me… what happened to you? What's wrong?" she breathed out achingly, her own eyes filling with tears at his distress.

"They didn't know… they c-couldn't find her… and y-you… a-and Michael…" Max started again, still making no sense to Liz. Until he began talking about his best friend and Liz gasped in fear at the thought of what that could mean.

"M-Michael? Did something happen to Michael?" she queried urgently, already dreading his answer, and she wasn't even surprised when she felt only half-relieved when she saw Max shake his head negatively. She loved Michael like a brother and it would have been as devastating to her if he had been hurt in any way as it would be if it were any member of Max's family.

Thinking then that if obviously nothing had happened to Michael, he had to at least know something for Max to mention him now, she was ready to move up and call him to get the answers Max was visibly in no state to provide, when his desperate voice stopped her abruptly.

"No… no, p-please… don’t leave… d-don't leave me!… not now… n-not ever!… please… don't y-you ever leave me… " Max cried out the moment he felt her pull away, even just slightly, and almost instinctively tightened his hold on her.

Just the thought that she could leave him now, even for a mere second was enough to send him into a frenzy and make his heart thud erratically again. No, she couldn't leave him, he wouldn't survive it if she did.

"Max?… I'm just going to ca-…" Liz's attempt at explaining what had been her intention failed miserably when Max crushed her to his chest the second she started to talk, and Liz gasped almost in pain with the force of his embrace.

More than by his words that actually barely registered in her brain at that moment, she was shocked to see him react so violently and uncharacteristically, moreover considering their situation. It was as if he suddenly couldn't bear to lose her or something, and she couldn't understand what could have prompted such a reaction.

"No… please, p-please, Liz… I just need y-you… " Max insisted tearfully, knowing that he was probably frightening Liz, but unable to let go of her for all that. "I-I need you!… J-Just you!" he kept repeating then, like he was almost afraid saying it only once wouldn't be enough for her to want to stay with him.

His words were barely a whisper into her ear, but it was enough for Liz to get that it would only make matters worse if she moved at all. She wanted to know what was wrong with him of course, more than ever in fact given how frantic he was, but if being held by her was the only thing he needed right at that moment, then that was what she would do.

"O-Okay, Max… I'm here… I-I'm right here… shh, it's okay…" she whispered soothingly, wrapping her arms around his neck and clinging to him almost as much as he clung to her.

His chest heaved painfully against her own and she could feel how his hands gripped at her top almost desperately, but nothing could have made her ask him to release her. Being in his arms again after so long, and that even despite the circumstances, was like being home again, and she wanted to savor the feeling for as long as she could. Her eyes closed at the sensation of being safely tucked in his embrace again, and like she had so many times before when something was bothering him, she threaded her fingers through his raven hair, caressed the nape of his neck, and kept promising him that everything would be alright.

For interminable minutes, she rocked him back and forth like she would do with Janelle if she needed to calm her down, and though he was nearly cutting her air supply all the while, she chose to pay it no heed. She would let him crawl into her skin if that was what he needed.

She didn't know how long they actually stayed there, in the same position and wrapped into each other and truth be told, she didn't care either since she needed this certainly as much as he apparently did himself, but she was glad nonetheless when she eventually noticed that his cries had died down and that his breathing had become steadier again.

As long as it made him feel better, she was ready to stay in his arms all night if that was what he wanted, but she knew that she could probably help him better if she had all the facts in hands.

"Talk to me!" she lovingly brushed his bangs off his forehead and coaxed him gently, when he eventually loosened his grip on her and she was able to look at him again.

Her heart nearly broke however when he looked back at her and she saw the same despair in his eyes she had heard earlier in his words.

"I thought I had… I-I was going to lose you f-for good!" Max murmured when Liz was convinced that he wasn't even going to talk to her and he managed to stun her almost into silence once more, for that was probably the last thing she had expected him to say.

"Max?" she uttered, taken aback, not seeing the connection between what could have possibly happened to him to make him lose it like he had and what he was telling her now.

Unless he was talking about what had occurred this morning, but then she didn't understand why he was bringing this up now. She couldn't even rejoice over the fact that he apparently didn't want to lose her any more than she did herself, if that was what he meant, because it just didn't make any sense to her yet.

"It seemed s-so surreal… I kept… I-I kept telling myself that it was… j-just a nightmare… but no m-matter how hard I-I tried… I just c-couldn't wake up… and it… god, it hurt so much…" Max continued as best as he could, but the instant he pictured Liz lying on the side of the road with Janelle hurt as well again, his voice shattered once more and he was unable to stop the flow of tears, or the sobs and hiccups that racked his body again.

"Max… I don't understand what you're talking about…" Liz admitted softly, before another thought crossed her mind and she decided to take another road to have her answers and therefore start asking direct questions. "Baby, why were you at the hospital tonight?" she inquired, as she remembered that obviously everything had started with that and with what could have taken place to lead him there.

"Because… b-because I thought y-you were there… " Max replied brokenly and though he tried his hardest, he couldn't help the tremors that coursed through his entire being when he recalled how it had felt to be there, fearing for her life and not knowing if she would make it or not.

"What do you mean?" Liz pressed on when he stopped there, wondering how he could have thought that, or how that was supposed to explain everything else, from the way he had broken down, to what he had told her so far and even less, the blood on his shirt, or his bandaged hand.

"There's been an… an accident this afternoon… on I405... and there was this woman… and I-I don't know how it happened… but she had… she had your papers… and they called m-me… and I-I thought… I… oh, god… oh, god, Liz…" as much as he wanted to, Max was unable to finish his sentence, but he didn't need to for Liz to understand what that meant.

Max had thought she was the one in that accident. He had thought she was the woman at the hospital and that she was injured, and that was why he had been there when he should have been at home with his daughter. It made so much sense now, and though her heart burst with hope at knowing that he still cared enough for her to be completely horrified by the thought of anything happening to her, she couldn’t help wondering how that could be? How something like this could have happened and what exactly he did mean by that other woman had her papers? As far as she knew they were in her wallet, and said wallet was in her purse. This story just kept getting crazier by the minute.

"What?… no, no that's not possible!" Liz denied vehemently, having a hard time comprehending how someone could have made such a mistake. How someone could have called Max and told him what? that she had been in a car accident and badly hurt evidently considering his reaction, when it was clearly not her? But then it hit her like a ton of bricks and she couldn't help the sob that tore from her own lips when she put all the pieces of the puzzle together.

"Oh, my god!… Janelle…" she cried out, without realizing that bringing their daughter in the conversation at this point was certainly not the best way to calm Max down.

"What?" he instantly asked, his eyes snapping back to hers and his body trembling anew, as he wondered what Janelle could have to do with all of this and why Liz suddenly seemed to know more about this than he did himself.

"This afternoon… when we went shopping… I… Janelle… she wasn't looking and… I-I had my hands full… and when we were in the parking lot, sh-she didn't see the car… I-I caught her before anything could happen, but there was this woman…" Liz rushed out, almost already sure of what his reaction would be to this piece of information, but knowing that she couldn't really explain the rest to him without telling him first about what had almost happened to their daughter.

"What? She what?… are you telling me that she… that…" Max all but shrieked when what Liz was saying registered in his brain. However, before he could even voice out loud what he already knew to be a certitude, Liz interrupted him quickly.

"It's okay, Max… she's alright… she just gave herself a good scare…" she tried to play the situation down but even hours later, she couldn't stop her own voice from cracking slightly at the prospect of what could have happened to Janelle had she not been quick enough.

Still, considering all he had already endured and how he had obviously completely flipped out when he had believed she was hurt and in that hospital, she didn't think that giving him more details on how close they had actually been to losing their daughter would be very wise. He would probably lose it for good if he knew and that was certainly the last thing she wanted to see happening.

"Oh, god…" Max groaned when he heard her, feeling the same pain he had felt when he had first been told that there was a possibility that Janelle had been in that accident with Liz, and therefore that she could have been injured as well.

His chest constricted to the point he was sure he wasn't even breathing anymore and it took all of his willpower to not break down and cry once more. Just thinking that his baby girl could have really been run over by a car and hurt in any way was more than he could take, moreover with the torture he had had to undergo tonight.

"Max… you've seen her, she's okay… you've seen that for yourself… nothing really happened… " Liz insisted and instantly cradled his face so he would focus on her and not on the dark images she was sure were already filling his mind.

"Janelle is okay, Max!" she repeated one last time and she all but expelled a sigh of relief when after a few seconds, she saw him nod his head in acknowledgment. The last thing she needed was another tear-episode, not when she knew all too well that she wasn't very far from losing it herself and that anything at this point could set her off.

"What… what ha-happened then?" Max managed to breathe out, once his heart had gotten back to a more or less normal rate and he found his voice again.

At the same time though, he was already mentally preparing the talk he would have with his daughter in the morning or as soon as he could, because if he knew her, she had most likely not been paying any attention to where she was going and he would surely have to remind her the rules they had established long ago. She had to know that what she had done was wrong anyway, otherwise she would have told him about that, too, when she had related her day to him, but it didn't hurt to have her hearing it again. If that meant that she would be more careful from then on, then he would repeat it to her over and over.

"I-I caught her in time but we just went… sprawling to the ground, and there was this woman, she somehow cushioned our fall… she was there shopping, too… and… and in our fall, we just lost everything… I-I mean… my purse fell… and hers, too… and I guess our things just got mixed up… and then Janelle… she helped us pick everything up… but we weren't really paying attention and she must have given her my wallet…" Liz explained, remembering that she had clearly seen Janelle with her wallet in hands at some point, but she couldn't tell for sure what she had done with it after that. "And yeah… we kind of looked alike I guess… she… she had dark hair, b-brown eyes… it-it must have been her then, Max and… god, is she… is she alright?" Liz concluded then before asking him about her condition, even if she was afraid to actually know the answer.

She had seemed so sweet and so young, she really hoped that everything would be okay and that she would pull through it, although considering the way Max had been, she suspected more or less how critical her state could be and how too optimistic that thought was.

"I-I don't know… when you called… when I-I left… I… the doctors said she was hanging on… but they didn't know if she… if she…" Max stuttered uncomfortably, a little ashamed that he didn't even know more, and Liz understood what he wasn't saying out loud: that once he had been sure that it wasn't her, he had not really cared anymore, because the only thing he could think about was getting back to her and Janelle.

Max couldn't tell her however the little he did know. Like the fact that that woman had lost her baby for example, because then he would have to admit that when he had thought it was her, he had really believed her to be pregnant and had been convinced that she had betrayed him in the worst way possible. No, confessing that now would force him to talk about Kyle Valenti, and the last thing he wanted right now was to remind her that there was someone else in her life. Not when she seemed to have forgotten everything about him and be concentrating only on him again. As stupid as it was and even if it was only for a few brief instants before they had to face again the hard reality of their situation, he wanted it to last. He wanted to be her priority again, the only one who mattered to her.

"Oh, Max… " Liz whimpered when she just tried to picture what Max had to have gone through while he was there and had been convinced she was the one fighting for her life.

Tears welled up in her eyes at the thought and as she pulled him into her arms again, she couldn't help whispering soft reassurances to him, even when she knew that she would certainly need more than a few 'I'm okay', 'nothing happened to me, or our baby' to make him forget all the horror of this night.

She had no way to understand what he had really suffered through, but she knew all too well how she would have reacted herself if it had been the other way around and she had been the one fearing for his life. The pain would have been unbearable and she would have certainly gone crazy, waiting there for someone to tell her if he would be alright. No matter how much they could fight, what could happen between them, or where they stood in their relationship and their marriage, she couldn't fathom a life without him being a part of it.

"Shh… don't cry…" she soothed tenderly, much like he had done to her not long ago, when he started weeping softly again, and she was more than ready to comfort him again and that for as long as she would have to, when he caught her completely off guard.

"I love you, Liz… " he declared out of the blue, his voice hoarse with tears, leaving Liz completely speechless.

She blinked at him a couple of times, sure that she had heard him wrong and yet, she couldn't stop her heart from triple-hammering in her chest, or her blood from pumping faster in her veins when he went on.

"I-I love you so much… you and Jay, you're everything to me… and I don’t want to have to leave you ever again… I-I don’t want t-to… god, I don't want to d-divorce either… I-I don’t care about anyone else and I don’t c-care what it takes… what I have to do… but I want to make things right, Liz… please… give me another chance… please, p-please, baby… I'd do anything, just don't leave me for good!" his face showed all the agony he had gone through for the last hours, the last months maybe even, all the heartache he had undergone from the second he had thought he was going to lose her, to this moment where he found himself hoping again and there was no way Liz could miss the sincerity in his tone, or how much he indeed needed her to give him that other chance.

This wasn't how he had planned to tell her what he wanted of course, but he didn't care, the words were out and he meant them now more than ever: he would die if he couldn't be with her. He would die if he lost her. He would die if she couldn't love him anymore.

For too long he had taken her for granted, sure that no matter what, she would always be by his side, but today had shown him just how utopian and foolish that thought could be. He didn't control a thing, he didn't have any power over what could happen to any of them and most of all, he didn't have any more time to waste.

A life without her wasn't worth living and if that was the last thing he did, he would make sure she understood that tonight.
End of chapter nine.a
TBC...

Well, that's it for now... but don't worry, I'm working on the rest and I hope to be back with it soon.
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Sat Jan 05, 2008 5:55 am, edited 1 time in total.
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RebeccaBehrEvans
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Post by RebeccaBehrEvans »

Author: RebeccaBehrEvans

Title: Before it's too late.

Rating: ADULT

Disclaimer: Roswell is mine. Jason Behr is mine. Roswell is mine. Jason Behr is mine. :twisted: Nope, even auto-persuasion doesn't seem to work, so I guess we all know what that means. :sad: (next time I'll try hypnosis and maybe then I'll succeed in convincing at least myself, lol. )

AN: Hey everyone :P

Here is the new part finally… sorry again for the wait :roll: … concerning it I only want to say that I personally couldn't have seen it any other way… I've given this a lot of thought before writing, wondering if this was really the way I wanted to go about it, or how you would react, but in the end I decided that it fitted my Max and Liz so there was no reason not to… I truly hope that won't be the case, but if you don't approve, feel free to say so and I'll be more than glad to explain myself more thoroughly and give you all the reasons why I couldn’t do it differently. (or maybe I'll let someone else do it, because she definitely analyzed this better than I could ever have :wink: :lol: )

This part is dedicated to you Tiph, coz I know you've been waiting for it like for ever :lol: … how long as it been since you knew… half a year? More? :lol: :lol:

Thanks Angie for bearing with me these last couple of hours and being so supportive when I couldn't just finish… I so know one day I'm gonna drive you crazy :lol:

And with that said, thank you guys so much for your awesome feedbacks, for you nominations, and for all the support you've given me since I started writing this story :-D

On with it now…

(oh yeah, before I forget :roll: … you'll probably recognize a couple of sentences from the show… just thought they fitted the scene here, but there was absolutely no infringement or whatever intended on my part. )

Posted in three due to length.
Chapter nine.b
"M-Max?" his name was a like a whisper on her lips, but when he added another heartfelt 'please, Liz', she found herself asking in a choked sob, "Is that… i-is that what you r-really want?"

The words rang true to her ears, she couldn't deny it, but part of her was just too afraid to hope. Part of her was scared to believe him, only to realize that whatever he told her now wouldn’t have much value once the shock would have worn off. What guarantee did she have that as soon as he would have calmed down, as soon as he would have grasped on the fact that he had never really come anywhere close to losing her and that her life had never been in danger, they wouldn't go back to where they had been this morning, when the most important woman in his life, the person he wanted to be with, was not his wife but Tess Harding.

She didn't think she would survive it if she caved to his pleading now and told him what he wanted to hear, if she admitted what was in her heart and what she wanted and needed herself, and he abandoned her again in the morning.

Objectively she couldn't negate all that had happened tonight either. From the way he had been with her on the phone earlier, to that brief kiss they had shared and that could mean so much and nothing at all, or yet the way he had crushed her to him like he had finally opened his eyes and realized what was just in front of him and what he could definitely lose… everything he had done or said so far confirmed his words and his impassioned declaration. And that was what she had wanted all along, why she had asked him to leave in the first place, even if it had at times, seemed ridiculous or pointless, but was it for real now? Was it forever?

"More than anything, Liz… please… tell me it's not t-too late… just tell me…" Max begged of her as he tenderly framed her face when she obstinately refused to meet his eyes, and then wiped away the silent tears she had not even been aware she had been crying.

Her own hands cradled his and she was actually ready to answer to him, even if she had no idea what would come out of her mouth herself, when she felt him caressing her cheekbone lovingly before tracing her eyebrow just as gently.

His gaze, his face took on an awed expression and she couldn't help but swallow thickly when he spoke again. The more he looked at her in fact, the harder it was for her to control herself and not just cry out how much she still loved him and how much she needed him.

"You're just so beautiful… so beautiful it hurts… my Liz…" Max whispered to her and even if he had wanted, he couldn't have hidden the emotion behind the words.

His fingers skimmed her face, like he was slowly discovering her again, and he gulped for air himself when he remembered the doctor telling him that his wife had been disfigured.

He hadn't cared about what that would mean for him back then, he had known that it wouldn’t have changed in any way what he felt for her, but now just thinking about what she would have had to endure if it had been her nearly broke his heart into a million pieces.

Overwhelmed with emotion herself, Liz had a hard time just breathing past the huge lump that clogged her throat at that instant, but when she finally managed to speak, it wasn't exactly what Max had been hoping for.

"What ha-happened to y-you?" she asked softly as she carefully took hold of his hand and before she could stop herself, kissed the bandage that was still wrapped around it.

Max inhaled sharply when he saw her do just that, but somehow he found the strength to answer nonetheless.

"The accident… it was… it was a drunk driver who caused it… and he… they brought him there, too… and when I saw him… he wasn't even hurt, Liz and I… I just lost it… I nearly killed him… I could… I-I could have killed him, Liz… I wanted to…" Max admitted shamefully and lowered his head almost right away, so he wouldn't have to see the disgust in her eyes when she would understand what he had done.

With retrospect, he realized that it had not been the right thing to do, but nothing could have stopped him then. He had just been blinded by the incommensurable rage that had consumed his insides, and hurting him as much as he thought he had hurt her had been the only thing he could still think about.

"But you didn't, Max… you didn't… I know you couldn’t, that’s just not you…" Liz replied, not wanting to condone what he had obviously done, but understanding nonetheless where he had been coming from.

She wasn't sure she wouldn't have lashed into the first person she would have thought responsible for her misery if the situation had been reversed and she had been in his shoes.

"Michael and two policemen… they had… they had to pull me off of him… or I would have… " Max revealed and Liz finally understood where Michael was coming into this.

Even if his earlier sentence still didn't make much sense to her, at least now she knew that his best friend had been there, at the hospital, with Max when he had obviously needed him and she was definitely grateful for that fact.

Her eyes drifted to where Max's fingers were now fiddling with the hem of her top and as they trailed down his own shirt, she couldn't help noticing the blood there again.

"Is that… is that y-your blood?" she stammered apprehensively, already picturing how bad his hand injury could be if it indeed was.

"N-No… I… I don't think so…" Max answered, but Liz couldn’t miss how he visibly cringed when he took a look himself.

"Maybe you should… c-can you take your shirt off?" she breathed out before she could really think about the wisdom of such a move, and then she blushed slightly when Max's surprised gaze collided with hers.

Oh, for heaven's sake, this was her husband and they weren't teenagers anymore, his shirt was soiled with the blood of a guy he had without a doubt beaten an inch from his life, and here she was behaving like they had done, or were about to do, something wrong.

She just wanted him to get out of that dirty shirt so he wouldn't have to stare at the reminder of what had happened and what he had done to that man, there was nothing wrong or weird with that, was it?

"Can I?… y-yeah…" Max croaked out himself when he saw she was actually serious and though his voice trembled as he uttered the words and he wasn't able to understand why, he was already taking off his jacket before she could change her mind and tell him that this was actually a bad idea.

"I'll get you a clean one in a minute…" Liz told him, like that would change anything to the situation or take off some of the awkwardness of the moment.

Of their own volition, her shaking fingers reached for the buttons of his shirt and she sucked in a breath when at the last one Max joined her and briefly laced his own fingers with hers.

The contact was all too short for his liking, but soon her hands were running up his torso until they pulled his shirt over his shoulders and down his arms and Max immediately forgot about the disappointment he had felt not a second ago.

The instant she took a look at his naked chest, Liz couldn't help the small whimper that escaped her lips. Fresh tears stung her eyes, but it wasn't until Max looked down to himself as well that he understood why.

The funny thing was that he hadn't even felt anything, so out of control he had been when it had happened, but now he could see that he hadn't gotten out of there unscathed.

"Oh, baby… what did they do to you?" Liz moaned out almost inaudibly as her hand reached out and tentatively traced the angry red marks that marred the usual perfection of his torso.

First the long line that barred his chest, from where Max assumed one of those policemen had exerted a fair amount of pressure when he had used his truncheon to make him let go of the driver. Then the different scratches marks on his shoulders and neck, probably left there from when they had repeatedly tried to take a good hold of him to pull him off of the other guy.

"It's okay… it doesn't even hurt…" Max whispered to her, relishing as much in the feeling of her soft touch, as in the way the endearment had slipped off her tongue so easily.

It wasn't the first time tonight, but each time he heard it just gave him more hope. Of course he knew she had yet to answer him and that nothing at all had been solved so far, and if he was honest, the wait was slowly killing him, but at least she hadn't bolted off of him like being near him and knowing what he wanted was the last thing she could actually consider herself.

If anything, she seemed to need the contact as much as he did himself and he couldn’t act either like asking him to take off his shirt meant nothing at all, no matter how much they were obviously both trying to play it down. He didn't want to read too much into this of course, but the way she was reacting so far, the way she was looking at him, and god, the way she was touching him was anything but innocent.

Unaware of how Max kept staring expectantly at her, or what her simple exploration was doing to him, Liz couldn't help wondering how much Max could have actually defended himself and struggled against whoever had obviously tried to grab for him, to have them leave such marks. What's more, if that was what they had to do to him to control him, she didn't want to imagine how bad off the other guy had ended up then.

As her fingers skidded over his skin, she felt him trembling under her touch like he had the very first time she had touched him this intimately so many years ago and she almost smiled at the memory. So much had happened between them since then, only her feelings for him had never wavered.

Consciously, she probably didn't realize herself when she actually started moving, but before Max could really understand what was occurring, before he could even just picture in his mind that it could actually happen, Liz's lips were replacing her fingers on his skin and that was most likely the end of any coherent thought he could still have had.

His fists clenched at his sides, his eyes closed almost reflexively but as hard as he tried, he couldn't help the soft moan that tore from his throat at the first contact of her mouth with the sensitive skin of his neck.

Very slowly, her lips brushed every evidence of this night and the ordeal he had been through and soothed his damaged flesh better than any ointment or medical cure ever could. More than once, he even had to resist the urge to pinch or shake himself awake, sure that this was only his imagination doing, yet in the end it didn't take him long to realize that instead of asking himself a million questions, he should just follow his heart and let it lead the way.

If part of him found the strength to briefly wonder if this was right, or rather if this was the right moment, all too soon there was nothing else he understood but the sensations that flooded his senses and wreaked havoc on his body, and the need for her that pulsed through his veins.

A shaking hand tangled through her long mane when she made her way up the column of his throat, his fingers gripping at her hair for dear life, while he still fought for some kind of control, only to find out that this was a battle he had lost long before it had even started.

At that moment, Liz herself wasn't thinking anymore. If she had been, she would have surely questioned her own sanity herself, she would have maybe even taken the time to reconsider what she was doing before it was too late, but at this point she was so far gone that it didn't seem to count anymore.

She was acting on pure instinct here, like she would have if nothing of the last eight months or so had ever happened and she had found herself in this position now with Max, and she wanting to find a way to appease him. And who cared if it didn't make any sense?

Only as good as her intentions were, it was having just the opposite effect on Max. If he could definitely not feel any pain, calm and relaxed was the last thing he was, and he knew it wouldn't take much more for him to explode completely.

"Liz…" Max choked out hoarsely, drawing her attention to his face, if only for a brief moment, but when she met his eyes, he forgot about what he had wanted to tell her, or if he had even been thinking at all.

Liz stared at him somewhat confused herself at first, probably wondering what was happening as well, or if this was really where she had meant to lead them, but he would have had to be completely blind to not see the same need and passion lurking in her eyes.

A second, two maybe, that was all it took them to acknowledge what they both wanted and understand that there would be no stopping them. Who moved first they couldn't tell, but when their lips finally touched, they both felt the power of the kiss all the way through their bones.

Just like the one they had shared a mere hour earlier, it was tentative at first, but none of them could deny the special significance it held, or how much had changed between them already since then.

Of course many things still needed to be sorted out, talked about, and he well knew it, but as far as Max was concerned, her actions, her acceptance now, answered his request better than any other words could have and that was all that seemed to matter at that instant.

His lips caressed hers more insistently, getting reacquainted, discovering again, remembering just how good it felt to kiss and be kissed by her, and the feeling only left him yearning for so much more.

How long they kept kissing tenderly none of them knew, it could have been seconds like it could have been hours, but it wasn't until Max tasted their mixed tears on his lips that he realized they had both been crying.

"Don't cry!" they both whispered at the same time, before chuckling softly through their tears.

Then they sweetly kissed again, once, twice, and Max even favored Liz with a wobbly smile, but it didn't take him long to sober up again. He felt like he would just die if he didn't let the words out, if he didn't express what was in his heart.

"God, Liz… I miss you so much…" his breathing uneven, his forehead against her now, he murmured softly, fighting to control his emotions, but failing miserably.

He didn't know what he expected to hear in return, but when Liz eventually spoke, he could swear his heart stopped beating altogether.

It wasn't so much the words she said, but more the way she breathed them out, like she had been waiting just as long to be able to say them herself, and at that instant that meant the world to him.

"I miss you, too!" she admitted and when Max saw her biting at her bottom lip almost right away, it took all of his willpower to not crush her to him and thoroughly ravish her, right there, right then.

Instead however, he tenderly ran his thumb on it, until Liz had no choice but to release her lip and the instant she did, he trailed his tongue over it, like he meant to take away the small pain she could have inflicted there.

Liz moaned out at the contact and that was all the encouragement Max needed. His hungry lips closed over hers, more demanding even than they had been till then, and Liz knew she couldn't refuse him anything. Nor did she want to.

She surrendered to him completely, the way he urged her to open up to him making her head spin with desire, and even if she had wanted to resist him, to slow them down, when Max cupped her face into his large hands and angled her head to deepen the kiss, Liz knew she was lost.

On and on, Max kept nibbling at her lips, before feeding her his tongue and stroking hers with his own, only parting when the need for air became too urgent and he had no choice but to let go of her, even if only to allow them to fill their burning lungs.
Her reprieve was short-lived however, Max needing her too much to let her pull away for too long, but she was certainly not complaining. There was no way to misinterpret his kisses now or their urgency. He wasn't trying to comfort her this time, but just to show her how much she still meant to him, how much he had indeed missed her, and Liz could do nothing but reciprocate the feeling.

Things didn't really start heating up though, until the hand that had been restlessly caressing the small of her back became more insistent, pressing into her more firmly, and made him cradle her closer.

When they lower bodies eventually met, they both hissed into each other's mouths at the contact, and if Liz still had harbored any doubt about how much Max could want her at that moment, feeling the prominent evidence of his arousal pressing into her own desire cast them all away.

His name spilled from her lips in a desperate cry, and she couldn't help but gasp in pleasure when his hand ran down to her bottom before drifting under her top to caress the bare skin of her back. The other one joined it momentarily before they both gripped her hips and Liz briefly wondered if he meant to stop them there.

Despite herself, she had started grinding into him, hoping to alleviate the ache throbbing between her thighs, but contrary to what Liz could have thought, the last thing Max planned to do was to stop her. His fingers dug into her sides, bringing her closer, urging her on, crushing her to him and Liz was all too eager to let him.

His mouth trailed a path of fire down her neck, stopping at her collarbone when the strap of her top prevented him from going any further, and he seemed to hesitate there only for a brief second.

He knew what he wanted, there was nothing else he could think about in fact, but he was also very conscious of what that would mean. No matter how much he could want her and want them to go further, he knew that there would be no turning back if they crossed that line. At least not as far as he was concerned.

Reluctantly so, his hands drifted down her arms until he was holding hers again, and he finally forced himself to look back at her, even when he knew what he could find there.

He shouldn't have needed to worry however, considering that Liz felt that she would just burst from the inside out if he stopped touching her for too long. She craved his hands on her body, his lips on her skin with a passion that scared even herself.

Things shouldn't be as easy, she shouldn't let herself forget all those months of misery she had gone through without him just with a kiss and a few tender words, and yet she couldn't bring herself to fight that unreasonable need to be one with him again, to rediscover what it felt to be wholeheartedly loved by him for all that.

She wanted him, more than she had ever wanted him in her whole life before if that was possible, and she knew she wouldn't be able to pretend she didn't any longer. Not when he was touching her like she was the most precious thing he had ever seen, and certainly not when he was looking at her like he would just die if she rejected him now.

A look at her and the tender kiss she planted on his lips in encouragement was finally all Max needed so to understand that she felt the same way he did himself and that she wouldn't regret whatever would happen now between them any more than he would.

His fingers were shaking so much when he reached for the hem of her top that he was convinced he would have to ask her for help, but he somehow managed to refrain himself even if had actually no idea how he did it.

His movements were uncertain, hesitant, like this was actually the first time he was going to see her naked, and he couldn't help but smile at the thought. How ridiculous, when they had done this a thousand times before, when he knew her body like the back of his hand, yet it seemed so different and even more important that he did this right now than the very first time they had discovered each other intimately.

Very slowly, he pulled the cotton material off her, his breathing becoming more and more erratic with each inch of skin that was revealed to his hungry eyes, and he couldn't help moaning along with Liz when the palms of his hands brushed her painfully hardened nipples.

Needing to have her top out of the way as much as he did now, Liz helped him take if off when he seemed to struggle to get it past her head without catching her hair with it, and she couldn't stop the gentle smile that crept upon her lips at his sudden clumsiness. Max had never had any problem with that before, but she found it endearing now. At least it proved that he was as nervous as she was herself.

Her smile died on her lips however, when once she had untangled her long mane off her top, her eyes settled on his face and she saw how he was looking at her.

His own eyes were fixed on her bare breasts and she couldn't stop herself from squirming slightly under his intense scrutiny.

For a second she wondered what could be going on in his mind. If he suddenly found her lacking in that department now, or if she had changed so much since the last time they had been like this, for him to stare at her like this was actually the first time he was seeing her at all, but she quickly forgot the thought with his next action.

His trembling fingers hovered just above her right breast, just close enough for her to feel their presence but not really touching, and Liz sucked in a ragged breath, waiting for him to close the final distance.

When he didn't, she grew worried and even frowned, wondering if there was something wrong, and already braced herself for his reaction. She fully expected him to tell her that he was sorry and that he couldn't do this, but instantly berated herself for even letting herself think so negatively in such a moment.

"Max?" she called his name ever so softly, holding her breath in anticipation nonetheless.

"Will you… will you still be here if I… if I-I…" he stammered, his voice sounding hoarser than he wanted it.

"If you what, Max?" Liz urged him on gently when he kept refusing to look up at her and continued to stare at his fingers, only an inch from her skin.

"If I touch you… will you stay with me this time?… or-or will you just disappear like you always d-do?" he gulped audibly and then merely whispered, Liz having to nearly strain her ear to understand him.

The instant she did, she felt her throat clog with tears as the whole significance of his words register in her brain.

She didn't know how that could be possible, but Max was visibly as insecure about the turn of events as she could be. He wasn't even sure that this was really happening, and Liz nearly cried at realizing just how hard things had obviously been for him as well. It made no sense to her so far yet, but still. All this time she had truly believed that she was the only one haunted by him and how much she missed him at night, but from what he had told her just now, more than once obviously, he had to have dreamt of her, too, only to wake up alone in the end and realize that she wasn't there with him, that it had only been just that, a dream.

She had a hard time understanding what it meant for them, considering their relationship these last months, but she wasn't about to question it. The only thing that mattered was that contrary to what she had believed, Max had apparently not been as happy all this time, or even indifferent to their situation, as she had thought he had been till now.

The way he looked at her with his heart in his eyes now and his vulnerability made her chest constrict painfully, and the only thing she wanted was to cast all his insecurities away and promise him that everything would be alright.
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Sat Jan 05, 2008 3:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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RebeccaBehrEvans
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Post by RebeccaBehrEvans »

"I'm not going anywhere… if you don't… if you don't want me to." she told him softly, her thumb tenderly tracing his bottom lip while her hand palmed his cheek.

Her voice cracked slightly as she uttered the words, but she didn't doubt that he could see just how much she meant them.

With them, she put a stop to any reservation she could still have had herself, and finally acknowledged what she had known all along in her heart. That if he wanted her back, nothing and no one would stop her from being with him. And no matter how much they still had to clear out between them, no matter how weak that could make her look in the eyes of some, she wouldn't back down. They had both made many mistakes along the way, they had both said or done things that they would probably always regret, but it was time they stopped paying for them.

She saw him close his eyes as he heard her and when his hand covered hers and he brought her knuckles to his lips for a gentle kiss, she couldn't help but smile tenderly, yet it was his next move that was really her undoing.

With misty eyes strained on hers, he traced her wedding ring, like he was somewhat surprised to find it still there and smiled weakly at her before kissing it and before Liz could stop herself, she mimicked his gesture, her own eyes brimming with tears as she realized what it represented.

So far it had merely been the symbol of their union, but today it meant so much more than that. Today it said that despite everything they had gone through, they had never truly been able to let go of each other, Max no more than she could herself, and she wondered how she could have not seen that before.

"Then don't!" Max croaked out, his fingers lacing with hers, while his other hand cupped the back of her head and brought their faces inches of each other's. "Don't ever!" he repeated huskily, his lips grazing hers in a feathery touch as he spoke, and Liz didn't think she had ever heard more beautiful words.

Overwhelmed, she poured every emotion she had bottled up inside for so long into their next kiss, whimpering softly when Max ended it too soon for her liking, but that soft sound was nothing yet compared to the way she moaned when she felt his lips descend down the column of her throat to attach themselves to her collarbone. His tongue then trailed down her chest until it stopped just above her hard and aching nipple and Liz wondered if she was still even breathing.

His hands came to cup her swollen breasts and she was still reeling from the incredible sensation when his mouth eventually closed around one distended nub and started sucking gently on it.

Her head spun from the heady pleasure and she gripped at him for support, sure that she would just fall over if she didn't.

Fingers threading through the hair at the nape of his neck, she urged him to take even more of her into his expert mouth, and Max was all too eager to go with her request, the feeling being just as amazing to him as it was to her.

When he considered he had given enough attention to that one, he switched breasts and swirled his tongue around the other protruding peak before engulfing it in his mouth as well, delighted when Liz kept moaning his name and begging him to not stop.

As she arched into his arms in obvious need, Max kept torturing her, kissing, touching, and caressing until Liz could barely take it anymore, and when he sensed the moment was right, he let his fingers glide down her sides, until they were encircling her hips and grabbing them firmly in his strong hold.

"Sit up!" he all but growled out, his hands urging her up almost desperately, and Liz didn't even think about protesting. Why would she?

Even from where she was, he could smell her arousal, her scent being just as intoxicating to him as it had always been, and he knew he couldn't wait a second longer without baring her to him and seeing all of her. He had gone too long without her, without touching her, tasting her, and there was no way he could control himself anymore now that he was so close to having her again.

On shaky legs, Liz tried to stand up, the task being nearly impossible to her in fact, but when Max hooked his fingers through the elastic band of her sweatpants and slowly undressed her while she went up, she really thought that she would just collapse on the spot.

Her more than soaked panties went with her pants, Max not having the patience it would have required to take them off separately, and he couldn't help groaning loudly at finally seeing her in all her glorious nudity in front of him.

His face only a few inches from her dripping center, a low guttural moan escaped his lips as he inhaled her sweet fragrance, and before Liz could even really steady herself after he had made her step out of her pants, he reached for one of her legs, bending it and supporting it just under her knee and Liz sucked in an audible gasp in anticipation.

She knew what he intended to do before he even touched her, but still, when she felt him run his tongue along her wet folds after so long, she nearly keeled over.

Teasingly, he probed her entrance, his appreciative groans coinciding with hers, until his lips came to suckle gently on her clit and she swayed forward, glad when her hands encountered the bar in front of her and stopped her from falling completely.

Her knuckles almost turned white as she gripped the edge of the counter, but she knew that it wouldn't help much anyway. She wouldn't last in that position, her legs wouldn't support her much longer with the things he was doing to her.

As if sensing her distress, Max guided her down to him again, but barely let her breathe a sigh of relief before his mouth was on hers again, making Liz growl as she tasted herself on his lips. Desire unfurling in the pit of her stomach, she kissed him just as hungrily, reacquainting herself with the passion that had been so familiar in their relationship for so many years but lacking for so long now that she hadn't been sure she would ever feel it again.

Her tongue dueled with his for dominance, her hands gripped at him in desperate need, molding her body to his like she was trying to make him crawl inside of her, but Max couldn't mind, the need to be as close to her as possible being as powerful and impossible to repress to him as it was to her.

For interminable minutes, nothing mattered but that, and none of them was able to relinquish their hold on the other. It was the shrilling sound of Max's cell phone going off in his jacket pocket that finally seemed to bring them both back down to Earth and made them pull off each other, at least momentarily.

"Let it ring!" Liz demanded breathlessly, not ready to let reality crash in on them just yet.

In her state, she didn't even recognize the ring tone and who it corresponded to, and she was just too afraid of who it might be to let him take that call.

Max did however, and as much as he wanted to listen to her and ignore it, he also knew that considering the message he had left them, his parents would probably worry if he didn't answer.

"Liz… I have to… it's my pa-…" he started, only to be interrupted by her lips slanting on his again and silencing him mid-sentence.

"Please!" she insisted when they parted, her mouth trailing up his jaw line and reaching his ear before she licked its outer shell. "Please, Max!"

How was he supposed to think clearly when she did her best to stop him from doing so? How was he supposed to refuse her anything when she was in his arms, naked, responsive and needing him as much as he did? The answer was easy, he couldn't, and truth be told, he didn't want to see anything interrupting them any more than she did apparently.

"O-Okay… I-I… I'll just c-call them back!" he relented even more easily when Liz started rocking her hips into him, making it nearly impossible for him to formulate the sentence.

"Thank you!" she whispered, glad that he wouldn't fight her on this and break the spell of the moment. She wasn't in any hurry to let the real world intrude and come between them for now. There would be enough of that later.

"W-Welcome!" Max barely got out before capturing her lips in another searing kiss, quickly forgetting about the phone that still rang a couple of times in the background.

When it eventually stopped, none of them really noticed or cared, the only sounds they were still able to hear were their ragged breaths and the soft moans they couldn't contain as they both explored skin.

When Max finally cupped her behind and cradled her against his hard body, Liz knew they were going to move to another level and she couldn’t stop the loud keening sound that rumbled from her throat.

On instinct, she wrapped her arms and legs around him even before Max whispered to her to hold on to him, and she didn't let go until he had moved them a few feet away and gently laid her down on the soft rug lying there in front of the fireplace.

It didn't escape her that this was the very same spot where they had made love the very first time after moving into this house, the same where they had christened the place, and she couldn't help but think that it fitted the situation perfectly. This could be a new beginning for them, she wanted, no, needed to see it that way, and she would do her best to make it as unforgettable as it had been that first time.

It had to be a girl thing however, because Max barely thought of that, the only thing that was really clear in his mind was that he was about to make love to the woman who owned his heart, and had from the very second he had laid eyes on her. The woman he loved more than life itself.

Lying on top of her, he couldn't not admire her for a while and as he did, his breath caught in his throat at the thought of what he had almost lost.

"You're even more beautiful than I remembered you!" he murmured reverently, drinking her in, his fingers tracing her face gently, then losing themselves in the hair he loved so much.

Tears shimmered in her eyes at his sweet words but before they could freely roll down her cheeks, he was capturing them with his lips and took that opportunity to rain loving kisses everywhere he could, learning the contours of her face again while his hands rediscovered the generous curves of her perfect body.

Liz's own hands weren't idle either and as he took care of her, she did some exploration of her own, running her fingers down his back, tickling his sides, until they stopped at the waistband of his pants and she realized that when she was completely bared to his gaze, he was still quite overdressed and she wasn't sure she liked that fact.

As he cradled one of her legs high over his hip, his fingers dancing across her bottom and then along her thigh, she ground into him, swallowing every rasping grunt he emitted into her mouth, and when he still didn't seem to understand what she wanted, she decided to be even more direct and eventually cupped him through the material of his jeans.

Max growled as she did, and when he just couldn't take it anymore, he kissed her passionately one last time and then leant back on his heels, needing to somehow free himself from the almost painful now tightness of his pants.

As he opened its button and lowered its zipper he all but sighed in relief, only to moan out softly afterwards when Liz stroke his length from where she was, using her foot on him this time and smiling mischievously at him as she did.

"Liz!" he groaned warningly as she parted the flaps of his jeans with her toes and started caressing him through his boxers now, enjoying the feeling despite himself nonetheless, and only when it became too much did he grab for her, knowing that if he didn't stop her, this would be the end of it.

Looking at her sprawled before him, thighs spread and knees bent slightly, made him want to ravish her and reclaim her as his without any more preliminaries, but he knew he couldn't. He not only needed to slow them down if he hoped to last, but he was also well aware of how much he needed to make up for the last time they had been intimate.

When he remembered how he had taken her that morning, how impersonal and almost brutal it had been, he nearly cringed and cursed himself again. But this was a new opportunity that was given to him, a new chance to show her how precious she was to him, how much he did want her and loved her, and he couldn't afford to screw it up like last time.

Still on his knees, he brought her foot close to his mouth, and his eyes still locked on hers, placed soft butterfly kisses on its surface, pleased when he saw Liz gasp for air at his unexpected action.

Deciding that she needed to be taught a lesson for having been so mean to him a short moment ago, he took his time teasing her, paying extra special attention to the soft skin of her ankle, as he remembered how sensitive she surprisingly was there, then kissed his way up her calf, stopping only to taste the flesh of the underside of her knee.

He spent a few seconds there before trailing his tongue along her inner thigh, nearly losing it himself as he heard Liz purr in contentment, but then he smiled as he noticed her breath becoming shallower the more he approached her burning heat.

Deviously, he ignored it, proud of himself when Liz protested when instead of giving her exactly what she needed, he licked his way up the line of her tan, from the juncture of her thighs to her hipbone, and left her feeling highly frustrated.

Seconds after, his lips burned the skin of her stomach, his pace deliberately slow, until he finally reached his next destination. Spurred on by her moans, he traced the curve of her breast with his tongue, before flicking it around her hard nipple, only to stop abruptly when they were both starting to get too much into it.

At this point, Liz didn't know if she should just keep begging him for more until he took pity on her and finally stopped there his sweet torment, or hit him for being so cruel and depriving them of the pleasure they both were seeking.

Of course there was no denying that she liked what he was doing to her, very much in fact, but right now the only thing she really wanted was for him to possess her and make her his again. She wasn’t sure she would be able to wait much longer in fact, not with the way she ached to feel him inside of her again after so long.

"Max!" she gasped helplessly, as he continued to make his way up her body, but kept ignoring her pleas even when she was sure he knew well what she was asking for. She could feel his need as well, pulsing against her thigh and the contact only made her crave him more.

"Patience, love!" Max whispered, his fingers lacing with hers before he peppered the length of her arm, from her shoulder to her wrist with fleeting kisses. He barely touched her at all in fact, his lips simply brushing against her skin, but it had the same effect on her it would have had if he had been devouring her with his mouth.

"I c-can't…" she whined before she could stop herself, hearing how desperate she sounded but not caring in the least.

"Yes, you can!" Max negated almost playfully, a second before he ran his tongue across the palm of her hand and then sucked a finger into his mouth, making Liz whimper huskily at the sensation.

Sure, part of her was glad that they had managed to find back some of the playfulness they used to share, but now was so not the right moment for that. Not when she was truly convinced that her body would just go up in flames if she didn't have him. She wanted him, needed him more than her next breath, so how was she supposed to control herself when he did things like this and set all her nerve endings on fire? That was simply impossible and he perfectly knew it, even if he didn't seem to care presently.

His eyes remained firmly trained on hers while he subjected every finger to the same treatment, and much to Liz's dismay, he only stopped to go and attack the sensitive skin of her neck.

Arching into his arms, she held into him for dear life, hoping it would somehow help her get through this, but as she felt him nip at her earlobe, she knew it was no use. He was simply driving her insane and she was putty into his expert hands.

"Max… please, stop t-t…" she started to protest once more, knowing that she wouldn't stand much more of this, but her sentence was cut short as his mouth crashed on hers again and once more took her breath away.

"Teasing?" he queried hoarsely as they came up for air minutes later, and this time Liz could see that this wasn't as easy for him as she had thought till now.

Still, it didn't stop her from making him understand that she truly found what he was doing to her really wrong.

"Torturing!" she countered with much seriousness and a cute little pout on her lips that only made Max need her more.

"I'm not torturing you, baby… I'm only trying to make you feel good." Max contested between gentle kisses and Liz sensed his sincerity, even if at that moment it didn't really help her feel any better.

He was making her feel good, there was no doubt about that, but she would certainly feel even better if he stopped taking his time, got rid of his jeans and joined them as one at last.

"Max, please… I want you!" she breathed out, nibbling at his bottom lip as if to show him how much and to Max at that moment, more beautiful words had never been spoken.

"I want you, too, believe me!" he concurred, the hand that rested near her side till then bringing her closer, as he pressed himself more firmly between her parted thighs and rub his throbbing length against her as to add more weight to his own words. "So much!"

Not waiting for an answer, he cupped her face and kissed her almost desperately, months of restraining himself finally becoming too much to bear, and only stopped because he knew there was still so much he wanted to do to her before giving in.

When he pulled away, his eyes had darkened so much Liz barely recognized their shade anymore, yet she had no doubt that the emotions swirling into them matched her own, because she felt the passion gnawing at her insides probably just like he did and just like him, she knew it wouldn't be satisfied until they were one again.

Almost reluctantly, Max left her lips but only to resume his task and give the rest of her body the same thorough attention he had so far. Mimicking his earlier moves, he started with her left arm, slowly descending its length this time, then running his skillful tongue over her collarbone, all the while making Liz chant his name in almost agony. If he took as long to take care of this side of her body as he had with the other, she was just going to die before he finished.

Max at that moment didn't seem to be in any hurry however, and Liz had to bite her bottom lip and nearly draw blood to not cry out and wake up their daughter when he finally stopped just an inch from her breast.

Had she been in any state to really pay attention, Liz would have recognized that particular glint in the tawny pools that looked back at her at that instant and be prepared, but at this stage, she would have probably not been able to react if the house had crashed down on them and so she didn't see a thing coming.

She felt his free hand caress her flat stomach, sure, but when he reached the apex of her thighs, it was already too late for her to even just think about taking her next breath.

Pulling himself upward just long enough to nuzzle her neck, Max gently eased a teasing digit into her moist core and groaned even louder than Liz could herself if that was possible.

"You're so wet for me!" he drawled out, half in observation, half in wonder, not quite sure he believed himself what he was finding there, or that it was actually his doing, and that even when he had been witness himself earlier of the magical phenomenon.

Yes, she had said that she wanted him, but her body spoke the words even more powerfully right now than she had before. Her body couldn't deny what he did to her, even if she could maybe want to.

Quite tentatively yet, like he was afraid he would wake up if he tried to have too much at once, he pumped his finger a couple of times inside of her, before nearly killing Liz, and himself in the process actually, with his next action.

Withdrawing with a soft curse on his part and a sharp intake of breath on Liz's, he smeared the glistening proof of her desire over her till now neglected nipple, and growled hoarsely when his tongue darted out to scoop the sweet nectar into his mouth.

Over and over then, he kept licking at the distended peak, until there was no trace of what he had just done, and when he was satisfied he had cleaned all evidence, he went in search of more of her intoxicating essence to taste and savor.

Like she had predicted, the journey down was just as torturous to Liz as the previous one had been and she couldn’t wait till he finally reached his final destination. She could only hope that it would be soon, or she might have to get violent on him. Her body was literally pulsing with sexual energy, and Max kissing his way down her hip, so close now from where she needed him the most, surely didn't help the matter. Nor did what he did next.

Rolling her slightly on her side, he nipped at the tender skin of her bottom, before moving down her thigh and stopping just above her knee. But when Liz expected him to continue on his path until he reached her foot like he had done before, he let her lay fully on her back again, and eventually brushed his lips up her inner thigh.

As he did, he spread her legs even further apart, so he could settle between them again and get more comfortable, and Liz could only look at him with clouded eyes, knowing what would finally be coming next.

Gaze locked on her, he ran his tongue along her slit, the gesture even more erotic and thrilling now to Liz than it had been before since she knew that this time he wouldn't stop just there. Or so she hoped, or else she would just have to kill him.

Closing her eyes, she mewed in bliss as he lapped at her entrance, her body arching into his delicate touch, her blood pounding into her ears, until that was the only sound she could still hear.

God, she had almost forgotten how good Max could be with his hands and mouth. With his tongue. Or rather she had preferred to force herself to forget, because each time she thought about it, she was reminded that now he used his skills with someone who wasn't her.

She didn't let herself think too much about that now however, knowing that the time would come soon enough when she would have to seek the answers he only could provide, and moreover since now, even if they had yet to talk, she had even more questions than she had before. So little made sense now to her that she didn't even know what was true and what was not. What she could believe, and what she definitely shouldn't.

How could Max be so loving with her, so attentive and caring, if he had really done what she thought he had? How could he look at her with so much love in his eyes now, if the last thing he had wanted was really to stay attached to her in any way? It seemed just impossible that this could be the same person that had so shamelessly broken her heart, destroyed her trust and wanted with another, all the things he had always claimed to want only with her! No, not even the fear of losing her could have changed him so much again, she couldn’t believe that.

Words spoken months ago floated back through her mind, the voice she had come to hate so much coming to haunt her once more, even if only for a brief second, but she chose to ignore it for now, this definitely not being the right moment for that. She wouldn't let anything ruin this moment with Max, because if this was the only thing she could still have once everything was said and done, she wanted to savor every single second of it. And fortunately, Max was doing a mighty good job helping her with that.

Any thought of anything but him and what he was doing to her were quickly pushed to the back of her mind when he stabbed his tongue into her wet center and teased her briefly before replacing it with his finger, quickly working her toward what she was sure would be an earth-shattering orgasm.

The way he drove in and out of her almost too gently contradicted the hungry way he started to suck on her clit at the same time, and Liz was powerless to stop the shaky gasps that spilled from her lips in reaction.

Max himself was honestly going half out of his mind, not only with her taste, but with the way she panted huskily each time his tongue twirled around the small bundle of nerves that was without a doubt the source of incredible pleasure. Each time he withdrew his finger and plunged it right back into her dripping core.

Seeing her face contort in bliss and sensing her trembling under his hands, didn't help in any way either, but when another one of his fingers joined the first, he knew she was close and was almost grateful for the fact because he didn't know how much more he could take himself.

Seconds afterwards her moans grew even louder and when Max finally felt the already tight walls of her sex contracting around his moving digits, he sucked her swollen nub into his mouth again and didn't let go until Liz cried his name in complete ecstasy.

A brief instant he remained just where he was, while Liz struggled for breath after such amazing sensation, and then he moved up her body to join her once more.

Unable to refrain himself, he briefly stopped when he reached her trimmed stomach and couldn't help covering it with kisses, his fingers skimming over the perfect and flat expanse of the womb that would one day grow round and hopefully bare his other children as well.

A wave of emotions washed over him at the thought and he had to blink back tears in an effort to control himself and not break down once more. How he could have doubted that this was what they needed, what he wanted was beyond him at that instant, but he wouldn't make the same mistake twice. Not if he still had any say in it.

Not wanting to cry again and spoil the moment, he then trailed his tongue between the valley of her breasts and didn't stop until he was licking the underside of her jaw.

"Hi!" he whispered with a cute and satisfied smile once their eyes eventually met again.

"Hi, back!" Liz answered just as softly, almost shyly, her arms going to encircle his neck before she brought his lips to hers for what was supposed to be a tender kiss.

Only none of them was able to still and really control themselves at this point, and it quickly escalated into something way more passionate and needy. Something they weren't able to fight any longer.

"Max… please, now!" was all Liz had to say to Max once they broke apart for him to know what it was she was asking for.

Unable to speak at that instant, he just nodded wordlessly and quickly moved to stand up and get rid of the rest of his clothes.

As he kicked his shoes and socks off, his eyes remained fixed on Liz and he couldn't help but growl when she propped herself on her elbows to not miss a second of it, and not surprisingly he saw his hands shaking again as he tried to discard his pants and boxers without hurting himself in his state, aware that in a minute he would be as naked as Liz and about to make love to her. Finally.

For a brief instant, he closed his eyes as he stepped out of his clothes and drew in a long breath to calm his nerves, and he only realized his mistake when the second he opened them again, he noticed that Liz had crawled on her hands and knees and was now only inches from his painfully hard member.

Tall and proud he stood before her eyes, and Liz couldn't help but lick her lips in anticipation, making Max almost spill his seed right there as he caught the gesture.

With trembling fingers and a low groan rumbling from her chest, she reached for him and softly caressed the flesh that she hadn't seen or touched in so many months.
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Sat Jan 05, 2008 3:37 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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RebeccaBehrEvans
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Post by RebeccaBehrEvans »

She heard Max's sharp intake of breath and the hoarse way he uttered her name at the first contact, but she paid it no heed at that instant. The only thing that mattered was how much she had missed this and how much she wanted to taste him again, and therefore the next second she did just that.

Still holding him gently in hand, she ran her tongue from base to tip and then before Max could even react, closed her lips around his swollen sex.

On instinct, one of Max's hands went to her head and his fingers tightened into her hair, even if only for a few seconds.

A few seconds, that was all he would grant her and himself. A few seconds to enjoy again the feel of her mouth and hand on him, to remember and then he would stop her, he swore, or he knew well that they would have to wait for the rest if he didn't.

Only Liz was making the task almost impossible with the way she sucked gently on him and kept caressing his length when she released almost all of him.

She was driving him insane, all the more when he could see how eager she could be herself, how she seemed to need and want this as much as he did, and it was only when her hand drifted down to cup his sacs that Max understood that he didn't have much choice here. Either he put an end to this, right there, right then, and that even if there was a good chance it would kill him in the process, or he went all the way.

In any other circumstances, the choice would have been easy, but it had been so very long since the last time he had actually had sex, that he wasn't sure he would be able to last much longer now, and even less go for another round if she brought him to completion this way.

"Baby…" he croaked out when he realized that he was only seconds away from literally blowing it, but then he expelled a soft curse when Liz looked up at him and their eyes connected.

Oh, boy, he knew that look and it didn't bode well for him.

Left with no other alternative there, Max forced himself to take a small step back, knowing that Liz had obviously no intention of stopping before she was rewarded with what she was looking for.

"Yeah?" she whispered, the small smile on her lips confirming that she knew exactly what she was doing to him. How could she not when she still had him hard and swelling under her touch despite his attempt to pull free of her.

"You have to stop!" Max breathed out, his hand grabbing hers at last before he entwined their fingers together.

The instant he did, he saw her ready to protest but before she could, he was down on his knees in front of her and she could only gasp, as his lips covered hers in a scorching kiss again.

Her arms went back around his neck almost immediately, needing something to anchor herself before her trembling legs made her fall completely off, as at the same time one of his wrapped around her waist and brought her closer to him.

One hand tangling in her long mane, he angled her head to deepen the kiss, and Liz moaned right along with him when not only his tongue delved into the deepest recesses of her mouth, but at the same instant their bodies molded into each other, the hard points of Liz's nipples burning holes into his own chest.

Blindly, his fingers glided down her smooth thigh and lifted her now bent leg over his hip, and none of them could stop the loud groans that escaped their lips when their naked lower bodies connected at last and they both felt how much they indeed wanted each other.

Draping her other leg around his waist as well, Max was unable to wait any longer and as Liz held on to him, he lowered her to the floor again, his own body following hers until they were aligned and ready to be joined again.

"Love me again, Max!" Liz all but begged, her body writhing wantonly under his, while one of her hands reached out for him with the intention to guide him to her.

"I never stopped, baby… never…" Max vowed emotionally as he felt her rub his length against her dripping center, Liz's words taking a whole new meaning with his answer and only contributing to add more to her already growing confusion and suspicions.

She couldn't say a word about them though, as Max's lips brushed against hers once more, then down her cheek, the soft pulse under her ear, the hollow of her collarbone, making her forget about anything but the feel of him and what he was doing to her.

His breath ragged, he still somehow found the strength to pause just long enough to regard Liz and make sure she was really alright with what was about to happen now.

"Are you sure, Liz?" he demanded as he momentarily stilled her hand, his heart beating erratically in his chest, even when he knew that she had more than proved tonight that she needed this as much as he could himself.

He knew it was pretty ridiculous to still hold on to his insecurities, but he needed to be certain she understood how much this meant to him. If they did this, if she let him make love to her now, he would want forever with her again, and she needed to be sure that she was ready to give him just that. He wouldn't settle for anything else after the agony he had had to endure to reach this point and be with her here again.

"Are you?" Liz whispered back, her free hand coming to stroke the side of his face, the gesture and the words similar to those of that night so long ago when they had first become lovers.

He had asked her the same thing then and she had known that he wouldn't do anything, wouldn't try to go any further, if she wasn't certain that this was really what she wanted, if she had had even the slightest doubt about the rightness of the act.

She read the same need to be sure in his eyes now, but just like then, she knew that this wasn't only about her. Like the first time, they were in this together, and like the first time, they both realized that taking the next step would change their relationship, hopefully for the better once more.

None of them had voiced their answer out loud back then, no more than now, but they didn't need to. There was no denying their feelings -or their bodies needs and craving- and both knew that this was the right thing to do. At that instant and with their next kiss, Liz admitted to herself that she was forgiving him, and Max convinced himself that she was choosing him, and that was the only thing that seemed to really matter to them then.

Releasing her hand, Max let her bring him to her heat, and eyes firmly locked on hers, he let himself sink into her depths for the first time in what felt like years to him, the sensation leaving them both breathless and quivering in reaction.

It was only when he was fully sheathed into her velvety walls, that the full impact of what they were doing crashed in on him and for a moment he felt completely overwhelmed with emotions.

"Max?" Liz murmured as he rested his head against her shoulder and at the same time, she tried to control herself as best as she could as well and not simply break down in tears once more at the sensation of having him inside of her again at last.

"J-Just give me a minute… it's… it's been so long…" she heard him breathe out against her skin, and instantly wrapped her arms around his still but yet trembling body, totally understanding how he felt.

For a few seconds, they both remained almost completely unmoving, relishing in the incredible feeling of being one again, and when Max eventually propped himself on his forearms, there was no way for them to miss the tears brimming into each other's eyes again, even despite their efforts.

"I love you!" caressing her face like she was the most precious thing in the world to him, Max couldn't help but whisper what had been true in his heart for as long as he could remember, even if his mind had tried to make him forget it at times.

It had all been in vain however, because now more than ever, he knew that no matter what, he wouldn't be able to love another. And as his gaze remained on hers, even before she had any opportunity to speak the words, he discerned that something he had seen that last time they had made love as well, but had been so quick to negate and reject then.

She didn't need to say anything because like always before her eyes reflected every emotion she was sometimes unable to put into words, and this time he didn't question them. The passion he recognized, the craving and need he understood, and the love he clung to it like a drowning man to his lifeline.

At that instant, whatever had happened during the last few months, almost didn't matter because Max understood something he had only dared hope for till then. That whatever the reasons she had turned to another man had been, there was a small part of her that had never stopped loving him, never stopped wishing there could have been another way, and with that realization he let go of the pain. Because of that and also because he knew he was for the most part responsible for the downfall of their marriage, even if he refused to give it too much thought right now.

But he had learned his lesson and after tonight, he wouldn't ever give her a reason to doubt him, a reason to seek into someone else's arms what she couldn't find in her own husband. After tonight, he would become her everything again, just like she had always been his, even if he had maybe let her forget it too often in the last few months… or worse, years.

Starting right now, he promised himself as he pressed his lips to hers again and ever so gently started to move inside of her, picking up a slow rhythm that belied the fire unfurling inside of them.

Steadily he drove in and out of her, enjoying each thrust to the fullest, plunging as far as he could go, and then withdrawing till Liz barely felt him anymore, and she could do little more but to let him lead them.

Their lovemaking was nothing but slow, tender, unhurried, lips constantly seeking, fingers restlessly stroking parts of skin that seemed to ignite under their gentle touches, and there wasn't a thing they could do to stop the passion cresting between them.

No words were needed, their grunts and the scent of sex permeating the air spoke of what was happening and what it meant. Every kiss, every touch, every stroke like a whispered promise for a better future. A future they both hoped they would see and face together, even despite the circumstances.

As their need to find release into each other's arms grew even stronger, thoughts of Kyle, Tess, or anyone else were non-existent for once, because the only thing they both remembered was how much they still loved each other. Despite the fights. Despite the heartache and the tears. And despite the deception they still believed was true.

As Max kept sliding in and out of her, Liz felt her heart racing in her chest till the point she truly believed that it would just burst out of it, but she wouldn't have stopped him for anything in the world, even when the pleasure coursing through her threatened to suffocate her.

Her hands gripped his sides as she raised to meet his thrusts, her fingers briefly grazing the puckered skin above his hip where a bullet had pierced his flesh over a decade ago and sealed their fate, and they found themselves smiling at each other, albeit wobbly, in remembrance. Apparently good things could come out of something terrible and they had both experienced it, that was why they knew that they could go through this as well.

Slowly, as they lost themselves into each other, they felt the gaping void that had been in both their hearts ever since they had had to part, being filled at last, but even with that they still needed more.

Seeing her writhe almost desperately under him, Max understood right away what she wasn't expressing out loud, and as much as he liked to be the one in control, he loved when she took it even more to not gladly relinquish it to her.

With barely any effort on his part, he turned them over, the smoothness of the move speaking of how many times they had performed this dance before, and they both growled when Liz impaled herself on him the second she was on top.

Immediately after, they were kissing again, and Max pressed her against him once more, one hand caressing the small of her back while the other rested high between her shoulder blades, not quite ready yet to let go of her warmth, or the feel of her against him.

Not that she seemed to mind herself, the way she rubbed along his length, undulating sensually over him, the sure sign of how much she appreciated the position herself. On and on, she ground her pelvis against his, creating what Max was sure was a delicious friction on her clit, and he could do little less but encourage her as she did. There was simply no words to express what it did to him to see her, feel her use his body to pleasure herself.

His tongue chased hers over and over, tasting, tangling with hers, and only enhancing the incredible sensations, and nothing would have made them part if it weren't for the need for air.

"You're so beautiful… so beautiful it hurts… my Max…" Liz murmured as she took on the dreamy expression on his face, repeating the words Max himself had spoken moments ago, the same emotion tainting her voice and causing a similar tightening in their chests.

Max's heartfelt answer died on his lips however, as Liz's tongue darted out and licked them before plunging into his mouth and mating with his once more.

Interminable minutes afterwards, when they came up for air, Liz straightened herself on top of him and for a fleeting second Max found himself wondering if this had been such a good idea after all and if he would survive the experience.

Her fingers entwining with his, she slowly started to rock her hips into him, delighted when she saw the pleasure etching on Max's gorgeous face.

For what seemed like eternity, she raised herself up and down above him at a torturous pace, but Max wouldn't have it any other way. He wanted to savor each second, remember every single detail of it.

Sighs and tiny gasps of rapture spilled from her own lips, and he couldn't remember having ever seen anything sexier than his beautiful wife riding him to completion, the candles light drawing patterns over her skin as she moved on top of him and making the sight even more breathtaking.

Max had honestly lost count of how many times she had already breathed out his name with that raspy tone that drove him wild, but the sound was music to his ears and he just couldn't get enough of it.

As her movements became more frantic then, he bracketed her hips, helping her as she gained speed and he ignored how her nails racked almost painfully over the back of his hands as he did.

He quickly forgot about the discomfort anyway when the next second she bucked wildly against him and her own hands lost themselves in her hair, and as she gathered it up on top of her head, he had to gulp for air. His eyes were immediately drawn to her graceful neck, where tiny droplets of perspiration pearled and clung to her skin now, and it took everything he had to not go and lick every single one of them.

"God, Liz!" he growled hoarsely, a mere second before he sat up straight and engulfed her in his arms again, having stayed as far away from her and for as long as he could.

Chest to chest, his fingers digging into the tender flesh of her bottom, he captured her mouth, his lips bruising hers in the process, but Liz found no reason to complain, she was too close for that and this could only help her quest.

The wave of pleasure that seized them both soon after made them groan so loudly then that Max thought for sure that they had woken up Janelle and that they would see her coming down and catch them in the act any second now and yet, not even knowing how embarrassing that would be, could he make himself move from the soft and hot confines of Liz's body.

Still, he knew he wasn't very far from losing it completely now, but nothing would have made him stumble over the edge without doing his best to take her with him.

While his fingers drifted between their slick bodies, his lips wandered down her chest, and as he pinched her engorged clitoris, he tugged on one hard nipple, immensely pleased when he was immediately rewarded with a sharp cry of satisfaction on Liz's part.

She trembled against him as he suckled greedily on the small nub still in his mouth and a moment later, he finally felt her tight walls contracting around him, not the least surprised when shortly after he was losing control himself and bathing her warm and still pulsating depths with his essence.

Seconds afterwards, Liz still clutched to him as strongly as he did himself as he quavered and still pulsed inside of her, and Max was sure that there couldn't be better feeling in the world.

"Max!" she whimpered his name once more as she neared the end of her orgasm and as he let go of her long enough to look at her, he finally noticed the tears slowly trickling down her face, the sight making him sober up faster than anything else could.

"Shh… shh… I'm here, baby… I'll always be here!" he promised and gently pulled her to him again, his arms wrapping even more tightly around her, and though he was very close to crying himself, he was determined to stay strong, at least for her sake.

He felt her shuddering in his embrace still a couple of minutes, and all the while he held her lovingly, threading soft caresses and gentle kisses that helped bringing heart rates and heated skins back to normal, and refused to relinquish his hold on her until she was completely calmed down.

During that time, he briefly wondered how she would react now that the sexual tension had somewhat ebbed down, if she would perhaps regret what they had done nonetheless, but he quickly pushed those thoughts aside, refusing to see them ruin the moment.

He had so much to tell her yet, so much he needed to hear from her as well, but though he knew they wouldn't be able to indefinitely postpone the moment, he would cross that bridge when he came to it. Right now, he just wanted to make the most of those precious minutes where he could still have her in his arms without anything or anyone coming between them.

Gradually, he felt her breathing evening out and only then did he let go of her, even if he didn't let her move very far. Tenderly he caressed her face and tucked loose strands of damp hair behind her ears, his eyes never leaving hers, and he was hit once more with how lucky he was to still be able to share this moment with her.

"I love you!" he repeated for the umpteenth time this night, like he was somehow trying to make up for all those months they had been apart and he hadn't been able to tell her so. But god, how he meant those words.

"I love you, too, Max!" Liz breathed past the huge lump that cloaked her throat, still quite not believing that she could say those words again.

It had been so long, way too long since she had let herself feel them without pain or any regrets, and it felt good to be able to do so, so freely again.

Their soft declarations were followed by a few murmured words and tender kisses that spoke volumes about their feelings and their state of mind, and none of them really thought about moving from their sitting position, until Max's protesting back forced him to lay down completely again, but not without taking Liz with him in the process.

Max didn't even consider easing out of her though, wanting only to relish in the feel of her in his arms and bathe in the aftermath of their lovemaking, and that for as long as he could.

No word was really needed between them then either, they just savored the feel of their cooling skins against the other's and the fluttering of fingers that just couldn't stop touching, the silence around them comfortable for once.

Lying completely on top of him, head over his beating heart, Liz smiled when she felt him play with a few locks of her hair, glad to see that obviously his obsession with it had not disappeared with time like she could have believed.

"Your hair is so much longer." Max whispered out of the blue, almost thoughtfully, like he couldn't quite believe how much it had grown since the last time he had had any opportunity to run his fingers through it.

"I was thinking about having it cut." Liz answered absentmindedly, a little distracted by the way the fingers of his left hand danced high over her hip.

"NO!" Max all but cried before he could stop himself, and then blushed slightly when Liz looked up at him wonderingly.

"No?" she propped herself on one hand and queried, an eyebrow raised in question, but the little smile on her lips proved that she had not really minded his exaggerated reaction.

"I-I mean… I… I l-like it like that…" he stuttered sheepishly, knowing full well that he couldn't exactly stop her if cutting it was something she really wanted to do.

"I won't then…" Liz told him after a few seconds just spent observing him while he squirmed before her eyes.

Then she resumed her position, only this time instead of just lying there, she started kissing the expanse of his chest and Max forgot anything about haircuts, or even his previous embarrassment.

It wasn't long before the brush of her lips against his naked skin became more insistent, and soon she was working her way up his neck, making Max wonder if she really realized what this was doing to him.

He didn't know if it was a conscious move or not, but when she started shifting on top of him, any doubt about what she could want or where this was heading, flew out of the window and he wasn't even surprised to note how easily the rolling movements of her hips coaxed his softening member back into awareness and caused him to stir to life again.

"Liz… baby…" he weakly moaned out as she licked a trail up his jaw, but then unable to wait any longer, he turned her face to him and plundered her mouth in a foretelling imitation of what he planned to do to her body in a minute.

Already ,he was thrusting ever so slightly inside of her again and Liz couldn't help but groan at the sensation.

Momentarily tearing her mouth from his, she fixed him a few seconds, and as Max saw her nibbling at her bottom lip, he wondered what could suddenly be going though her pretty mind. It was as if she wanted to say something, but couldn't bring herself to.

"What?" he questioned softly, his lips brushing over hers as he spoke and forcing her to stop with her nervous habit.

"Maybe… maybe we should take this upstairs?" she whispered at last, giving Max a better idea of where her hesitation had come from. Going upstairs meant that he would probably spend the night, but like he could refuse such an invitation, huh? He didn't see himself going anywhere else at this point.

"Y-Yeah!" he answered back, and if his voice cracked slightly, it was only because of what it meant to him, and certainly not because he had any doubts that this was what he wanted.

The scorching kiss he gave her in reassurance just after his acceptance appeased Liz's fears as well, just like his reaction when she tried to move off him.

There was no way she was making him leave her heat now. Not when he was as hard as a rock again.

"Uh-huh!" he was quick to say before he propped himself on his forearms and asked her to grab for the blanket just within her reach on the couch.

Though he knew that the possibilities of seeing that happening were slim now, given that if they hadn't already woken up Janelle with what they had done and how vocal they had been at times, chances were that they wouldn't by just walking upstairs, he didn't feel like taking any risk.

If she was to stumble upon them, he would definitely have a hard time explaining to her what they were doing, but at least she wouldn't be seeing anything she shouldn't.

When Liz got it, he draped it over her back and then, before she could even react, he rolled them over so that he was on top once more.

The move caused him to drive deeper into her core and before he could think about it twice, he found himself pumping slowly inside of her, Liz crying his name when it became too much being the only thing that stopped him from going all the way there and say the hell with their plan.

Quite reluctantly still, Max eventually moved up to his knees and as Liz held on to him for dear life, picked her up while she wrapped the blanket over both of them to cover their nudity, or at least as much as she could.

Before exiting the room, they blew the few candles that were still burning, Liz having already switched the lamp off before Max had even come down earlier, and it was almost blindly that he made his way up the stairs with her tucked into his arms, none of them really caring about the mess they were leaving behind them in the living room.

More than once on the way, Max felt his knees buckling under him and it was only by sheer miracle that he didn't drop Liz with the things she was doing to him. How he just managed to walk the distance when she was doing her absolute best to drive him crazy, licking here and there and everywhere she could reach, purring into his ear, undulating against him, he didn’t know, but he had probably never felt such sense of relief as he did when they finally reached the entrance of the bedroom.

The instant they were in, Liz dropped the blanket down and Max kicked the door closed behind them, and before any of them could even understand what was happening, he had her pinned against it and was ramming into her again, like they hadn't just made love minutes ago.

"Oh, Max!" Liz groaned as she felt his full length driving into her over and over again, her whole body trembling with the force of his thrusts.

"I know… I-I … god, this is… insane… we…" Max replied, aware of what he was doing but unable to bring himself to slow down.

"D-Don't stop!" Liz pleaded and cut him mid-sentence, sucking hungrily on his bottom lip to stop the flow of words. She didn't want to rationalize this. Not now.

"We… we haven't even t-talked yet!" Max managed to get out nonetheless, even if how he could was beyond him.

Yeah, talk, that was what they were supposed to do, but for the life of him, he just couldn't stop.

For all answer, Liz clung to him and reclaimed his mouth once more, causing any word he could have still tried to utter to get lost, and when they eventually parted for air, he couldn't even remember why he had been protesting.

"Later!" they both breathed out at the same time, both conscious of what was yet to come, but still too caught up into each other to let their questions and their need to know where they really stood interfere for now. They seemed almost irrelevant in the light of what had happened -and was happening- between them tonight.

They probably had a long way just even reaching the bed, so talking seemed even further away, but at that instant none of them really cared, because if there was one thing they were both convinced of now, it was that after so many months apart, hurting and being miserable, they were finally on the road to recovery. Finally healing. Together.
End of chapter nine.b
TBC…

So? :oops:

Next time they'll talk, I promise… C U then :wink:
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Sat Jan 05, 2008 4:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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RebeccaBehrEvans
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Post by RebeccaBehrEvans »

Author: RebeccaBehrEvans

Title: Before it's too late.

Rating: ADULT

Disclaimer: Roswell is mine. Jason Behr is mine. Roswell is mine. Jason Behr is mine. :twisted: Nope, even auto-persuasion doesn't seem to work, so I guess we all know what that means. :sad: (next time I'll try hypnosis and maybe then I'll succeed in convincing at least myself, lol. )

Author note: Hey guys,

Here you go, a brand new long part just for you… I'm not sure I did this right, but I truly hope you won't be too disappointed. :? … I guess this is really the turning point of this fic, the moment of truth, even if there are still some things to be discovered… that will come later, don't worry. We're really coming closer to the end :sad: and you'll soon have all the answers you could have been looking for : )

Well, that's it… I'm leaving for three weeks in a couple of days, and I don't know if I'll have any opportunity to come back by the board before that… so I'm leaving my baby with you… take care of him, okay? (yes, it’s a him, what's the problem with that, huh? :lol: )… I know I can trust you :lol:

And thanks of course for all the incredible feedbacks this story keeps receiving. It means a lot to always see the same faithful people around and some new ones sometimes as well… your words are always truly appreciated :P

Angie, keep looking for the laser blade somewhere in there *rofl*. With the size of the thing I'm sure you'll manage to get a peek… It's not that well hidden that it can be missed anyway LMAO. :twisted:
Eccentric One wrote:Something tells me that Tess was trying to set Max up. And now she's going to end up in the unemployment line! Hee hee.
Just for you, hun' :wink:

Posted in five due to lengths. :oops:
Chapter ten
He knew when she would wake up before she even really stirred, the way she seemed to become more agitated in her sleep being a dead give away.

She couldn't have been asleep more than an hour, but he was pretty much sure that she had needed the rest. He would have probably tried to get some himself actually, if he hadn't been so riled up.

Right now, he wouldn't even be able to close his eyes if he were paid for it. His mind was flooded with memories of her, of her scent, of her touch, of what they had done and how many times they had done it. It still all felt so incredible that he had a hard time telling himself that it had all truly happened.

When they had been younger, before they started to drift apart, their lovemaking had sometimes been pretty wild, but tonight had been something else altogether, even for them. Once they had started, they had simply gone at it like animals and had only stopped once they had barely been able to move anymore. He actually couldn't even remember how and when they had managed to reach the bed, but he was surely not going to complain.

They had talked some afterwards, nothing much though, just some trivial conversation, but when Liz had slowly started drifting away, Max hadn't had the heart to force her to stay awake, no matter how much he had wanted to prolong the moment. He had let her be, and had just been looking at her ever since, propped on one elbow, relishing in every soft sound that passed her lips, every slow raise of her chest, every little move she could make.

No matter how many times he told himself this was true, he just couldn't believe that he was really here with her, in this room, in their bed, spent after hours of lovemaking, and that was most certainly why he just couldn't bring himself to try and find some sleep as well. He was just too afraid that if he just as much as closed his eyes for a second, he would open them to the sight of her gone and would find himself alone, brought back to reality in the worst possible way, and he just couldn’t stand the thought of that happening.

Like it had a mind of its own, one of his hands moved to stroke her face, brushing away the few silky strands that obstructed his view, the contact soft, but he couldn't help smiling nonetheless when Liz turned into his touch.

Her eyes remained closed a few more seconds, but he knew that she was aware of her surroundings now, and he waited with barely contained excitation for her to turn that pretty face of hers up to him and look at him again.

She didn't do so right away, but Max couldn't mind then as she just moved closer to him instead, much to his pleasure. Yet that didn’t stop him from holding his breath when he finally saw her eyelids flutter open.

It didn't take her long then to realize where she was apparently and his heart beat a little bit faster when her gaze collided with his.

"Hi!" she smiled softly, albeit almost shyly, and he immediately felt his insides turning to mush all over again.

No matter how many times he could have seen her woken up near him in the past, or how many he hopefully would in the future, the sight of Liz just opening her eyes was one of the most beautiful he had been given to see.

"Hey." he answered just as quietly, moving forward to peck her lips almost right away.

He had been dying to do just that for a while now, and was all too glad that he didn't have to stop himself any longer.

"I drifted off, huh?" Liz mumbled, burrowing into his warmth, obviously a little embarrassed that she hadn't been able to stay awake when she was almost sure that he hadn't gotten any sleep himself. It hadn't lasted long though apparently, if she judged by the numbers on the alarm beside them.

"It's okay… I guess I just tired you out, huh?" Max whispered back quite smugly, but the way he kissed the crown of her head as he did showed nothing but affection.

"You could say that, yeah." Liz conceded with a little chuckle, not even wanting to remember how many times they had actually done it before they had managed to stop touching each other. They had probably set a new Guinness record. "What about you?"

"Couldn't sleep… besides, I didn't want to miss out on you snoring softly." he said all too casually and smiling, hiding the real reason behind his unwillingness to go to sleep.

"You… I don't snore… you jerk…" Liz retorted, feigning hurt as she playfully swatted his arm and then pinched his side for good measure, immensely pleased when Max gave an all too girlish yelp.

"Yes, you do!… but I like it… in fact it's the cutest thing ever!" Max grabbed for her hand before she could do more damage to his sensitive flesh, and used it to pull her up to him, stopping only when Liz was completely stretched on top of him.

"I'm sure it can't be!" Liz denied in a soft whisper, acutely aware of every inch of naked skin burning her own.

She then nibbled at her bottom lip, and Max truly felt like ravishing her again.

"Stop doing that… it drives me crazy!" he growled huskily before he could stop himself, wondering once more how she could have such effect on him when barely doing anything at all.

"Doing what?" Liz inquired innocently, tucking her hair behind her ear, another one of those seemingly insignificant things that made Max go wild.

"Doing that!" he groaned, cupping the back of her head and bringing her even closer to him so that he could nibble at her lip himself.

The next thing Liz knew, he was slowly stroking her tongue with his own and she found herself falling all over again. Unfortunately, just when things were really starting to get good, he stopped and placed a sweet lingering kiss on her lips that nearly made her growl in frustration.

Briefly, she closed her eyes, knowing that she probably shouldn't have let herself get carried away so easily in the first place, and when she opened them again, she couldn't miss the obvious and satisfied smile Max couldn't apparently hide. He just so knew what he was doing to her.

"So, that's all you've been doing all this time… watching me sleep?" she queried as indifferently as she could, though she was literally burning inside with the need to taste more of him.

"Pretty much… yeah!" Max answered vaguely as she settled higher on him, her head resting just above his shoulder now.

"Pretty much?" she parroted, trembling slightly when she felt his breath stir near her ear, the feeling only intensifying when he sighed heavily at her question.

"Go away with me…" he murmured almost out of the blue, nuzzling her neck tenderly while one of his hands distractedly caressed her hip.

"What?" Liz asked, her head lifting from its position so she could see his face again.

"I was thinking and… we should go away for a while… you, me and Jay… we could go anywhere… it doesn't even have to be far… you two just choose and I'll take care of everything!" he said all too seriously and Liz blinked before she actually even considered it.

Of course going away with him sounded tempting, there was no denying that, but she so knew it was not a possibility, too many things stopped them from having that freedom.

"Max… we can't… what about Janelle… what about school?" she protested, thinking that he wasn't seeing all the facts and not thinking clearly, or he would realize himself that they couldn't do just that.

"What about that?… she's five years old, how much can she miss?… besides, school is almost over…" Max argued right away, not seeing what the problem with that could be.

"Then what about me?… I mean I can't just leave like that…" Liz pointed out in return, even if she knew that they could probably work that out since she already hadn't gone to work today, and Jim had told her to let him know if she needed more days.

But still, she couldn't really do it, could she?

"Of course you can… Liz, you've never missed a day in all the years you've worked there… or hardly… I'm sure Jim wouldn't mind if you suddenly took a leave of absence for personal reasons." Max retorted, having already thought about that since that had seemed to be the major obstacle on their way.

He had thought about it long and hard while she was sleeping in fact. He just wanted her to say yes now, and for them to go away from everything and anyone they knew, so that they could really find each other again, talk about everything, and work things out between them, without interruption or interference. He didn't think that that was too much to ask, or was it?

"And what about you then?… I know for a fact that you can't just up and go!" Liz reminded him then, but the argument was brought up way more weakly than the precedents had been.

The idea of leaving with him, even if it were just to go to the next city did indeed look appealing and she would actually give everything she had to see it happening, but she didn't see how he would be able to work his way around of that, even if he seemed to have thought all the rest through.

"Already taken care of… when they… when I thought… I mean… I've already told Serena I wouldn't be coming for a week… " Max started before correcting himself, not willing to give much details and relive the moment he had received that fateful call. "She should have informed Tess and Alex right away… so I'm all yours in the meantime!" he told her, unaware of how much turmoil his words were going to cause.

If nothing else could have woken Liz up from the perfect and fantasy-like world she had been living in for the past few hours, his last sentence definitely did the trick.

He had just needed to utter her name and it had all come back to her, crashing her hopes and shattering her heart: the hurt, the fear, that feeling that she was literally suffocating, ripped apart from the inside out, every time she thought of them.

Where Max had been expecting to hear an answer so, a confirmation that she wanted to do this as much as he could, he got none. At least none of those he had been waiting for.

The way she physically tensed on top of him was the first clue that something wasn't right and before he could react, or understand what was happening, she bolted up right, scurrying apparently as far away from him as she could, and the only thing he could do during the few first seconds was stare at her, blinking and mouth agape, completely stunned by her reaction.

Not long afterwards, she tore the sheet from the bed, wrapped it around her shaking form and stumbled to her feet, her movements frantic as she obviously searched for something.

His heart constricted painfully in his chest, dread like he had rarely ever felt it washing over him, and he nearly choked on his own saliva as he desperately tried to swallow past the huge lump forming in his throat.

"Liz?" he called her name and winced at realizing just how broken his own voice sounded to him.

By now he was up, too, though how he managed to bring himself to even stand with the way he could feel himself trembling as well was a pure miracle, and was searching for anything he could put on before going to her. He didn't know how he knew it but something told him that, whatever she would say, having this conversation with her now wasn't something he would want to do naked. He was almost relieved so when he found a clean pair of his boxers and hurriedly pulled them on.

"Liz?… what is it? Did I… did I say s-something wrong?" he queried fearfully when he was done, his apprehension only growing when he noticed how much she had paled and saw her start pacing suddenly after she had put on one of his shirts.

The last thing he was ready for was to contemplate that fact of course, but maybe he had assumed too much and this didn’t change anything for her. Maybe it had just happened in the spur of the moment, nothing else and she was trying to find ways to make him understand it wouldn't work after all and that this, being with him, wasn't what she wanted. His heart rebelled at the idea of course, and yet he couldn't help the panic that assailed him the more he looked at her.

"Baby, please… talk to me!" he found himself pleading with her when she didn't stop, but then sucked in a breath when she turned around, feeling himself tear up as well at her obvious distress.

"I c-can't… I can't do this, Max… you… god, you talk like… like it doesn’t matter or… like it's not even… important anymore… but what about after this week, huh?… I just… I can't go through this again… I-I can't share you with her… don't ask me to, Max, please!" Liz stammered, her voice cracking every other word, not quite believing that he didn't understand how much it hurt to hear him talk so casually about the woman who had very nearly destroyed her life.

Tears rolled down her cheeks, but she didn't make any effort to brush them away, the pain in her heart being almost paralyzing at this point. Why had she let herself believe that everything would be alright now, that anything had changed at all just because they had spent a night of incredible passion in each other's arms?

Was that it? Would one week be all she got? A week when she would be the only one who mattered, when he would have eyes only for her, when he would whisper the words she had only dreamt to hear again for the last past months. A single week where he would be all hers. And then what? He would go back to Tess, to seeing her every day, and what would that mean for her, for them? She would always wonder if she didn't get this out, and she knew she just couldn't do it anymore.

"Liz?… What?… what are you talking about, sweetheart?… share me with… what? … I don't… Liz?" Max replied, stuttering himself, utterly confused and having no idea what she could be talking about. In fact, he was sure that part of what she had just said had clearly not registered correctly because it just didn't make any sense to him.

Here he was thinking, fearing that this was about Kyle, when it obviously was not and he couldn't help but wonder what the heck was going on now.

"I-I thought I could… do li-like nothing happened… I wish I could… but… I-I just got you back… I can't… god, I-I can't… l-lose you again!" Liz kept ranting, unconsciously sidestepping Max when he tried to come closer to her, and even if he was sure that her intention had not been to hurt him by being suddenly so distant, it didn't mean that he wasn't.

Yet even with that, Max refused to make the same mistake he had made so many times before, when he had let her close up and pull away from him, and he swore that whatever it was that had her reacting so emotionally all of a sudden, so irrationally, he would go to the bottom of it, and they would go through this, together.

"Liz… no one's gonna lose anyone here, okay?…" he stated as firmly as he could, as he gently grabbed for her arm and pulled her close to him, conscious that he was probably trying to convince himself as much as her. "Now please, talk to me, because I swear I absolutely don't understand what you're saying!… and… baby, you're really scaring me!" he pursued more softly as she met his eyes, his thumbs drawing small circles over her upper arms, even if that was certainly not what was going to help her calm down. Or him.

He could feel how his heart raced wildly in his chest the more he had to see her cry and he didn't know how much longer he could stand this.

At that instant, Liz herself briefly stared at him, that deep frown marring his forehead, and she wanted nothing more than to listen to him and let his voice soothe all of her insecurities away, but they had gone on like this for too long now, and it was time it ended. One way or another.

"I know we… I know we never really… t-talked about it… but… and I-I know what she… what sh-she means to you… but please, Max… for me and Jay… please, M-Max… " Liz sobbed before she could stop herself, hating how desperate she was sounding, but not really caring anymore at that moment.

After tonight, more than ever in fact, she knew that she couldn't live without him. She was also convinced that he wanted to be with her as well, she couldn't imagine that he wouldn't with everything that had happened between them, or with every heartfelt word he had whispered to her, but she wouldn't, she couldn't let Tess Harding keep overshadowing their relationship indefinitely, if there was any other way. He had to make a choice and she prayed with all her might that he would choose his family.

"Shh… shh… okay… come here, sweetheart…" Max coaxed her quietly and drew her to him, thinking that he had either lost many brain cells in the last few hours, or he had missed something really important in this conversation. "Liz, I love you, you know that, right?" he whispered as he sat on the edge of the bed and pulled her down on his lap, relieved when she went willingly and didn't fight him.

"B-But you love… her, t-too!" Liz hiccupped brokenly, despite the comfort that being in his arms brought her.

In all honestly, there was little doubt in her mind that Max truly meant everything that he had told her tonight, or that he indeed loved her, but that didn't mean that he couldn't love Tess as well. That he couldn't still want her even now, just because he had been with her again. He wouldn't be the first man in love with two women and certainly not the last, going from one to the other and unable to choose, she had gotten proof of that tonight as well, hadn't she?

"But who, Liz?" Max asked finally, getting really frustrated by now.

What the hell was wrong with her, and how could she think that he loved anyone else but her, or that she had to share him with anyone. The only other girl in his life was Janelle, and they had never had to compete for his affection.

"T-Tess!" Liz choked out at last, just uttering the name being enough to make her stomach churn and feel the urgent need to spill her guts.

"Tess?!" Max parroted dumbfounded, looking at her like she had grown a second head, and then, he couldn’t help himself. He just burst into laughter at the ridiculousness of her statement.

"This is not funny!" Liz cried out as she sprung off of him, his reaction hurting maybe even more than if he had just admitted aloud that she was right.

She knew for sure that she wasn't making these things up and seeing him… making fun of her was really the last straw. At least if he was honest they could work with that, they could go past this, somehow, some way, she had already forgiven him anyway, so why couldn't he at least meet her midway?

"Baby, if you think that I love Tess… excuse me, but it is definitely funny!" Max rejoined, still somewhat amused, until he noticed the way she was glaring at him and realized that she was evidently not finding any humor in the situation herself.

Sitting up so, he took the few steps that separated them now and reached out for her, trying to ignore the fact that she seemed almost reluctant to let him touch her.

"Look at me!" he commanded gently before he cradled her face and tenderly kissed her tears away, ending up with a few brushes of his lips against hers when she momentarily stopped crying. "Okay, now just tell me who the hell told you or made you think that I could love Tess! … I mean… she's my secretary, and well I guess… uh, a good friend, too… but believe me there is absolutely nothing romantic between us… not on my part at least… so I'd really like to know who's the idiot who convinced you otherwise!" he went on when he was positive that she would listen to him, and that even when he still couldn't get what could have prompted such a reaction.

If it weren't because he could see how serious she apparently was about this, how affected mostly, he wouldn't even be humoring her, but if being reassured was all she needed, he was ready to do just that for the rest of the night if he had to. Anything to chase away the pain swirling in her eyes and not see her cry any longer.

And still, even with all his good intentions and all, he was far from being prepared for what came out of her mouth next.

"You!" of all the things she could have said, that was certainly the very last one he had been expecting to hear and it definitely showed by the way his jaw dropped in reaction.

Okay, what the fuck was this? Was it a joke? Because clearly it couldn’t be anything else.

"Wh-What?… me… what??" he sputtered like an idiot, feeling like she had just hit him with a mass, not surprisingly caught between the urgent need to laugh himself silly, or just maybe shake her and ask her if she had lost her freaking mind. It was only the way she was looking at him in fact that stopped him from doing either, because there was no way he could think that she didn't honestly believe what she said.

A friend? How could he pretend that Tess was just a friend after all they had been through, after what she knew, and why was he denying it now when she had given him an opportunity to do so months ago and he hadn't judged that necessary?

"Uh, okay… honey, look I… obviously I-I've said or… or done something that made you think that… and therefore, even if I swear that I don't know what it could have been, I'm sorry… I truly am… but you really got it all wrong, Liz!" Max declared sincerely, though he briefly wondered nonetheless if he wasn't truly the one with a problem.

For the life of him he couldn't figure out what had brought Liz to be so convinced that he could have any feelings for Tess, but obviously he had some serious issues of communication. After all, Tess herself had apparently believed more or less the same or else she wouldn't have tried anything with him, and so he had to wonder what kind of signals, vibes, or whatever he was involuntarily sending off to have people around him believe something that he knew in his heart was absolutely not true.

That Tess could think so was bad enough in and of itself, but if Liz started as well, now that took the cake.

"Did I?" Liz queried emotionally, apparently not convinced despite his declaration and Max couldn't help looking at her incredulously, hurt beyond belief that she could question his words.

"Of course you did!" he returned indignantly, clearly offended now, but that didn't stop him from following her when she left the room and marched to their walk-in wardrobe. "Liz, what… what are you doing now?" he questioned shakily, suddenly afraid to see her get a suitcase out, throw all his things in this time and ask him to leave for good. The last time he had been here was still too fresh in his mind, and he felt his heart lodge in his throat when his fear was confirmed and he saw her open a drawer and start throwing some of his remaining clothes on the floor. "No… no, god… don't do this, Liz, please… please, baby!"
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Sun Jan 06, 2008 5:38 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Post by RebeccaBehrEvans »

His hands shook furiously as he did his best to stop her, seeing all his world collapsing in front of him again, but then he froze when she pushed some papers into his chest, the move so sudden that he barely had time to catch them before they fell to the floor.

"Now you're going to tell me that I'm still imagining things, huh?" Liz asked acidly, her chin quivering nonetheless despite her obvious effort to stay strong and not break down again.

Following her back into their room the second she moved, all Max did at first was to look between Liz's distraught face and the sheets in his hands, then back to her again, not seeing what could be the link between her, Tess and this now, until he realized that if he wanted to understand what all this crazy mess was about, he should better take a look at those documents, whatever they were.

His eyes nearly bugged out of their sockets however, when he started going through what Liz had just given him and the more he read, the sicker he felt.

...From: MaxEvans@AWME.com

… … … …don't even know how I do it… … … … … … … … … …

… … … … …can only think about you… … … … … … … … … … …

… …love you… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … …

… … … … … … …think it was possible to love so much again.

… … … … … end to my loveless marriage… … … … … … … … …

… … … … … … I just should tell her… … … … … … … … … … … …

… …keeping me with her is my daughter… … … … … … … … …

… … … … … … … … … … very soon, you and I… … … … … … … …

…our nights together… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … …

… … … … … … … … …making love to you… … … … … … … … … …

… … … …the day our baby will grow inside of you… … … … …

… … …a part of you and me… … … … … … … … … … … … … … …



Love,
Max.

…From: MaxEvans@AWME.com

Last night… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … …

… … … …being with you… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … …

… … …holding you close… … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … …

… … … … … … …nothing else matters when I'm with you… …

… … … … … … make all your dreams come true… … … … … … …

… … and you'll finally be my wife… … … … … … … … … … … … …

… … … … … … … … … … … …I just can't wait… … … … … … … … …



Yours forever,
Max.



Always,
Max.



Max.

Max.


Pages and pages of tender declarations, words of love and passion, promises and vows meant to someone he was obviously supposed to be close to and intimate with.

Pages and pages of blatant lies.

"Where the hell did you get this from?" Max cried out when he just couldn't stomach anymore, the picture becoming clearer and clearer the more he read.

God, it just couldn't be. He couldn't fathom that anyone could have given this to Liz. He just couldn't. She wouldn't have dared.

"Tess thought I should know about you and her, since you were obviously too much of a coward to tell me yourself… and she so amiably stopped by on her way to work one morning to give them to me." Liz revealed, seeing as Max's mouth opened and closed repeatedly, like a fish out of the water, as she confirmed his suspicions.

But then anger took over and she saw the dangerous gleam in his eyes, the sight so unusual that she reflexively took a step back. She knew he would never hurt her of course, but he definitely looked like he could hit something and she didn't really feel like being on his way.

"O-Okay… let me get this straight… Tess… Harding, my secretary… ex-secretary once I get my hands on her, believe me… came to you and gave you this?" he hissed through clenched teeth, his fisted hand trembling at his side as he obviously tried to keep some semblance of control. If he didn't, he just knew that he would explode and break something in rage. That… bitch.

"When?" he inquired after Liz nodded, the way he breathed out the word so calmly when she knew he was anything but being almost scary, and Liz wondered if it had really been wise to do this now when Janelle was in the house.

Max truly looked ready to blow a gasket and the last thing they needed was to have her see him in such a state. She didn't remember having ever seen him so angry before in fact, not even this morning when he had been less than happy with her, and a part of her couldn't help wondering why he was really exploding now. Was it because Tess had betrayed him and gone behind his back when he had obviously wanted to wait some more himself then, or was it because he realized that she had known for a while now? She didn't know yet what would be worse, but she guessed in any case, she wouldn't have to wait long to find out.

"Does it really matter now?… I know, that's all that should… " she began almost reluctantly, only to be brutally interrupted mid-sentence.

"DAMMIT, LIZ, WHEN?!" Max yelled before he could stop himself, but then couldn't help regretting it when he saw Liz start, a frightened expression on her face, the sight making him reach out for her immediately.

Scaring her was the last thing he wanted, but he needed to have all the facts, he needed to know everything, and once he did… god, once he did, he didn't even want to think about what he would do, but Tess Harding should have better left the state, or she might have to pay it with her life.

"I'm sorry… I… I didn't mean… god, Liz, just tell me when, please!" he demanded more gently, fingers threading through her hair near her temple while his thumb massaged it unconsciously.

"When you were in San Diego!" Liz whispered, voice so low that Max only just heard her.

She was barely with him anymore at that instant, the memory still so fresh in her mind that she felt as if she was transported months back.
~ * ~
The world was spinning around her, and she felt herself falling slowly. Her back connected with the piece of furniture behind her, but she didn't feel anything at all, even when the contact should have made her yelp in pain.

It can't be. It can't be. It just can't be, she kept repeating the same short sentence to herself, over and over again, but it just didn't help in any way.

The few minutes that had passed since Tess Harding had finally closed her damned mouth seemed like hours already, but she just didn't know what to say or just what to think.

This had been such a beautiful morning so far. Yes, she had not really talked to Max since he had left for another one of his business trips, and they hadn't actually said a word to each other about what had happened between them the morning before, Max having already left before they had any opportunity to, but nothing could have wiped the smile off her face for all that.

Nothing, until she had opened her door to find Max's secretary standing there, all blonde and faked. She had never really liked Tess in fact, even if she had never really been able to say why, but she was about to discover that she indeed had good reasons to not to.

At first she hadn't understood what she could be doing there when she had to know that Max was away, but when she had started to talk, she had instantly wished she had never asked.

She hadn't even bother with ceremony, she had just blurted it all out, Liz barely able to utter a strangled 'what?', or 'no' here and there, while she destroyed all her dreams and illusions. All her happiness.

"
Max and I are together now, we love each other." the words echoed through her head over and over again.

The rest was all a blur, the details about how long, the reminder of how strained their own relationship was now, the cutting remarks about how Max wanted out of their now loveless and meaningless marriage, at least on his part… it all barely registered yet, but she couldn't forget those few words.

"
Max and I are together now!"

"We love each other. "

Max was cheating on her. Her heart refused to believe it, refused to acknowledge that Max could have done such a thing to her, even when she had seen the signs that tended to prove that something was very wrong with him lately, but the more Tess talked, the less she managed to convince herself.

"Y-You're lying!" she forced the words out of her mouth at last, fighting against the irrepressible urge she felt to retch and that left a sour taste in her throat.

"Am I?" Tess said, raising a mocking eyebrow at her, and it took all Liz had inside to not just smack her head into the door. "Why do you think he pulls so many hours at the office?…why do you think he doesn't touch you anymore, huh? … how long has it been… weeks, months?… c'mon, the proofs are just in front of you… you can't be that clueless… or stupid!…" she taunted viciously before Liz could even react, and she could only look at her with glistening wide eyes.

Obviously Tess didn't know that it had only been yesterday that Max had been making love to her again, but she couldn't even rejoice over the fact. It just hurt too much to realize that Tess was apparently not making all this up contrary to what she had still wanted to believe, for she wouldn't know that she and Max had not been intimate for a while now if he hadn't told her himself. She just couldn't hope that it had only been a lucky guess.

It had hurt tremendously to see him be so distant with her for the last month and a half now, and as much as she had wanted to think that he was just exhausted from work and had probably too much in his mind, now she knew better and it very nearly killed her.

"But if you want more… here you have it…" Tess was still talking, but Liz barely heard her, so caught up in her grief. Until she searched her bag for something and presented her some folded papers.

She looked at the extended hand in front of her, wondering if she really wanted to know more, wanting nothing more but tell Tess to just go to hell with her stories in fact, but when the other woman lifted a defiant eyebrow, she knew she just couldn't give her the pleasure of falling apart right now.

She wanted to be so strong. She so wanted to pretend that all of this wasn't affecting her at all, but all her good resolve went right through the window with the first look at the papers she now had in hands. Her vision blurred with each line she read, each word like a new slap in the face, confirming with Max's own words all that Tess had been saying so far, and only when she felt bile rise in her throat again did she stop torturing herself.

"What do you want?… Why are you… doing this?" she asked at last, cursing herself when her voice cracked half way through her questions.

"I love Max, but I'm tired of waiting till he decides to grow a pair and talk to you…" Tess retorted confidently, making her understand the obvious, that Max apparently wanted to leave her, but was just not man enough to assume his choice and tell her himself. Yet it wasn't that that hurt the most. "So I'm doing what I have to… for me and my baby!"

The words cut right through her, and she felt her legs wobble under her. Her breath left her in a whoosh and she brought a hand to her heart, sure that it would burst out of her chest in the next second and that she would have to pick up its shattered, bleeding pieces.

"Y-You're… pregnant?" she croaked out heartbreakingly, unable to hide her pain and stop the flow of tears now, no matter how much she hated herself for showing Tess how much what she was telling her was ripping her apart.

It just couldn't be true.
She couldn't be pregnant. It just wasn't right. It wasn't fair, and she knew she wouldn't survive it if she were to confirm it.

"Not yet… but we're working on it." Tess enounced smugly but where Liz should have found relief, she didn't feel any.

They were working on it. They were sleeping together and were working on it. And soon Tess Harding would have what she couldn’t herself. God, it couldn't be true.

"I-I don’t b-believe you!… M-Max would never do that!" she replied almost right away, not feeling an ounce of the confidence she was trying to display, and consequently cursing herself once more for appearing so weak.

Max, the Max she thought she knew would never do that to her. Not knowing how it would devastate her, not knowing how much she wanted a baby herself, and not when he had told her so adamantly that he was not ready for another child.

But did she really know him at all now? a voice in her head pondered. Hadn't she thought not so long ago about how much he had changed, about how different he was with her now? So would it be so impossible that that Max could break her heart that way and not care about it.

"Max would do just that because that's what he wants! … do you really think that if he wanted to save your marriage he wouldn't have tried to already… he may still care for you, after all you two have a past together… but I'm the one he wants now… and I'm the one who's gonna give him that other child… because believe me, he
wants it with me!" Tess flung back, putting into words all that Liz had not dared to, and only confirming what she had already been thinking.

This was like her worst nightmare coming true, and god, she had not even seen it coming. Nothing, no nothing at all could have prepared her for this, and she knew that nothing would ever be the same now. Max was in love with someone else. Max wanted to leave her, he wanted a baby with Tess, how was she supposed to go through this? And Janelle, what would they say to her?

"Now do us all a favor… do what he can't…" Tess finished with a small smile that Liz wished she could just slap from her lips.

Do us all a favor? The last thing Liz was feeling like doing was any favor to that whore.

"I won't… I-I won't let you have my husband…" she gulped audibly but threw back just as venomously as she could herself, even if it didn't seem to affect Tess at all.

"Oh, hun'… I already have him… he hasn't been yours in a very long time… you just refused to see it… Now you know!" Tess chuckled mockingly, grinning like the cat that ate the canary now, and Liz instantly felt rage boiling her insides.

"Get out!" she hissed, having heard enough, and moving to fling the door open, all but forcing herself to not reach out to her and throw her out herself.

"Aww… sensitive much, are we? … Max always says that's your greatest weakness… I guess he was right!" Tess answered tauntingly, not making any effort to move though, knowing that it would certainly help aggravate Liz even more.

"Get the hell out of my house…
now!" she cried then, trembling but not caring anymore if Tess just laughed herself into fits at her accomplishment.

She just wanted her out and as far away as she could, or else she wouldn't be held responsible for her actions and Max would have to defend her for attempting murder first before he had any opportunity to leave her and start a new life with his tramp on the side.

"It was a pleasure talking to you… Ms. Parker!" Tess eventually strutted to the entrance, inflicting one final jab that was just the last straw for Liz and had her slamming the door to her back before she could control herself.

Her hand rested against the wooden material a few insignificant seconds before she slowly slid to the floor, and then the only thing that could still be heard through the house was the sound of the heart wrenching cries that tore from her very soul.

~ * ~
"Be more precise, sweetie, because I've been there a few times, so it could have been any of them!" Max's soft voice pulled her out of her thoughts, and she couldn't miss his concerned expression as he saw her blink back tears as she was forced to remember once more.

"In October!" she informed him, seeing something shift in his gaze not long after he heard her.

"In Oct-…? Wait a minute… we split in October!" he said, eyes going wild as what it meant registered in his mind.

"What?" Liz asked, wondering for a second if he was telling her that he and Tess had broken up back then or what. It couldn't be, could it?

"You and I… I mean that’s when you said you thought it would be best if we took a step back!" he reminded her, like she could have really forgotten about that.

She hardly could, considering that it had certainly been the hardest decision she had had to take.

"Yes." she confirmed simply, cringing nonetheless as Max let go of her and started to pace in front of her.

"Oh, for heaven's sake… Liz, please, don't tell me this is why you asked me to leave!… God, no!" he all but exploded almost right away, the expression on his face caught somewhere between extreme pain and total disbelief, yet before she could say a thing he already knew the answer.

It had all been for nothing. Months and months of misery away from her and all for nothing. God, how could he have been so stupid? That conversation so long ago, it had been about Tess as well, Tess, not Kyle, he realized with sudden clarity. She had thought he was with Tess. No, correction, Tess had done her very best to make her think that he was with her… and he had let her do this to them. He had walked right along, doing probably exactly what she had been expecting of him… fucking nothing.
~ * ~
"Why?… why are you doing this?" he asked wincing when his own voice reached his ears.

This was it, he thought, it had truly not taken her long to figure out what she wanted,
who she wanted finally. Funny that he just had needed to make love to her for her to come to a decision. He had wondered before how long she would last before she regretted it, well, he hadn't had to wait much to eventually know. Yet no matter how much he thought he had prepared himself for that during these three shorts days he had been away, he just couldn't believe how much it hurt to hear her say the words nonetheless.

When she had said that she couldn't take this anymore, he had still foolishly hoped that she was talking about anything but them, but she had quickly crushed that hope to dust.

"This… us… like this… I-I think… I think we should… part for a while… take a step back… I-I think we both need it… I…"

A step back meant nothing at all to him at this point. Taking a step back was something you did when you just needed some time to know what you wanted, but you still had the intention to work things out somehow, even if it weren't in a near future. What she was doing was choosing the easy way out to not have to tell him that they were over and that she wanted to be with someone else.

But he wouldn't let her get away with this just like that, if she wanted him to leave she would have to tell him why clearly.

"You know why Max, don't you?" Liz all but spat out and he just looked at her with a mix of aversion and incredulity.

"Why don't you tell me?… instead of serving me this bullshit, huh?" he threw back, getting angrier the longer he stood there and looked at her.

"What do you want me to say, Max?… you
fucking know the answer… why don't you tell me why?!" Liz fired, standing up from the bed and walking anxiously to the window, like she was trying to put even more distance between them and he knew that she wouldn't tell him what he wanted her to.

She turned her back to him then, and if he could see her trembling, for once the sight didn't move him like it used to, or made him want to go to her. This wasn't the woman he loved, she couldn't be. He didn't even think he knew her anymore.

"So that's it?" he choked out, hating that she could hurt him so much, but hating even more that he could still somehow hope, pray even, that she would turn around and tell him that she hadn't meant a word of what she had been telling him ever since he had entered their bedroom, that she was just confused right now but that they would somehow find a way to go through this.

He didn't find any compassion in her tone when she turned around however, she just glared at him like just the sight of him unnerved her now.

"Oh, because this kind of things is supposed to come with a good explanation, huh? Well, I don't have any I guess… oh, no, wait… what about you were working so much… spending all your time at your office… it was bound to happen, right?" she returned sardonically, and he winced at the amount of hatred he could discern in her words.

How dare she? Shouldn't he be the one being mad here? The one throwing the hateful stares? Wasn't she the one deceiving him? And yet she acted like she had the right to be angry at him, like it was all his fault. Yeah, he had been working his ass off almost every day, and yes, he had probably not been with her as much as he could have wanted, or she could have, but was that justification enough for what she had done? Not for him!

"Yeah, right!" he scoffed out, more disgusted by the sight of her now than he had ever been, or had ever thought possible.

He turned around then, entering their walk-in wardrobe and grabbing a few essential things he would need, and then couldn't get out of there fast enough.

When he left the room, he could have sworn that he heard soft crying, but he didn't walk back, sure that he had probably only been imagining the whole thing. Liz had no reason to cry for him now.

~ * ~
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Sun Jan 06, 2008 6:05 am, edited 4 times in total.
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RebeccaBehrEvans
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Post by RebeccaBehrEvans »

He nearly keeled over now as he realized that she hadn't been talking about the fact that she had turned to someone else because he had been working too much and she had felt neglected like he had assumed. She had been talking about him and about what she thought was true at the time, that being always at the office had inevitably led him to fall into Tess' arms.

"And what exactly was I supposed to do? Greet her in our bed and tell her, 'no problem, Tessie, I don't mind, come here, we can share my husband!' ?" Liz flung back incredulously, getting angry herself by now.

"Talk to me!… God, you should have just talked to me… I would have cleared that out immediately and we wouldn't have had to go through this!" he shot back like that was the most logical thing, and yet, he was guilty of the same thing, wasn't he?

He just couldn't believe this. How in the world could they have reached this point? And how could Tess have done such a thing?… he couldn't even wrap his mind over that one yet!

How many times had he confide in her? How many times had he talked to her about his feelings, the fool he was? He had opened up to her, and she had used everything against him, that backstabbing bitch. All this time, she had done her best to keep them apart, after having broken whatever was left of their marriage once he had learned about Kyle first, and he hadn't seen a fucking thing.

Oh, she had played her part well, so perfectly in fact that she deserved an Oscar for her performance. He remembered so clearly how many times she had come to him when it was evident that he was feeling down and told him that she was there for him if he wanted to talk to her about whatever it was that was bothering him, that she would listen and help if she could, and he had believed in her sincerity.

How humiliating it had been that first time to admit that he had caught Liz with another man, but she had let him talk, she had let him cry and let it all out, and had offered comfort and support when he thought that he would find none. There had been no physical contact of any kind then, but the words had been enough to relieve him some.

After that it had been so easy to trust her, he considered her a friend already, but she wasn't close enough to him, or to Liz, to pass judgment or take sides like any other of their friends could have, and that was what he had needed at that time. Not even Michael had known the whole truth back then, he hadn't found it in him to admit that he had failed, and that his wife wasn't satisfied with the life he provided, but she had, and it had all been faked.

He realized now just how naïve he had been. How many times had he heard her blame Liz for everything and tell him that she didn't deserve him anyway, and that if she wasn't able to see how lucky she was to have him, then he was better off without her. He should have known better then, and see past the sweet innocent smiles she delivered with the words. Maybe then he would have understood what her agenda had been all along, and she wouldn't have been able to do what she had.

He had to hand it to her for her imagination and patience however, because if he had wanted to make anyone believe he was having an affair, making up quite explicit emails was probably one of the most convincing ways, at least if you didn't look too much into the details. But considering how Liz had probably been when she had been told that he was cheating on her and shown that shit, she had certainly not been in any mind frame to pay much attention.

Not that he could blame her. The evidence had been right before his eyes all this time and he hadn't been able to tell himself what a conniving bitch Tess Harding truly was. Before the beginning of the week, he hadn't even suspected that she could be interested in any way. And even then, when he had rejected her, she had managed to play it off so easily that he had thought that it was only a one time occurrence, a lapse of judgment, without much consequences as long as she understood that there would never be any way they could be anything else but friends.

It was little wonder then if Liz had let herself be fooled, moreover considering their relationship back then. If he couldn't even see himself how manipulative Tess could be when he worked with her and mixed with her on a daily basis, how was she supposed to do so herself?

"What would it have changed?… the facts were pretty clear!" Liz countered right away, not seeing what difference it would have made at that moment.

She had chosen the coward way out, maybe, but she wouldn't have borne to hear him finally say out loud what had already broken her heart when read. All in all she had done the best she could with the hand she had been dealt, and it wasn't as if he had put up much of a fight when she had suggested he left. Didn't that speak for itself?

She had wished with all her might that he would tell her that this was absolutely not what he wanted, wished for him to show her that Tess was lying, that she was wrong and that he was ready to fight for her, for them, but he had just turned around and left, what was she supposed to think?

The only thing that she still needed an answer to was the question that had burned her mind all of these months, even when she did her best to avoid thinking about it

"How… how c-could you do that, Max?" he heard her ask brokenly and as he witnessed her start to cry anew, some of his anger instantly deflated.

"I didn't do anything, Liz!… I swear!" he was quick to negate, taking her in his arms briefly before pulling slightly away again and going to pick up the sheets of paper he had dropped on the bed minutes before.

"Liz… baby… look at this!" he told her, pointing at the first line on several of those damned emails that had possibly ruined his life and their relationship. "This is not even my email address!… and besides, why would I send her emails when she's my secretary?… I mean… I see her almost every frigging day!" he continued, hoping that she would see how ridiculous all of this was if you really thought about it.

Of course, given that Liz had probably only emailed him twice in all the years he had been working with Alex, it wasn't surprising that she wouldn't have noticed the subtlety, but still, the point remained that Max had never written anything so personal to Tess, or to anyone else for that matter. That supposed email address was strictly reserved for business anyway, so if he had had to, even for her, he would have certainly not used it either.

For the first time maybe, Liz really looked at the written address then and she couldn't help but frown first as she recognized clearly the familiar reference to "Alex Whitman and Max Evans Associates", until a closer look made her finally gasp.

How could she have missed that before? MaxEvans, not Max.Evans. The difference was almost not visible on paper if you weren't focusing on that, and honestly she hadn't been, too hurt by the content of the emails to pay attention before, but that little point, or rather lack of, changed everything. God, Tess had probably just created a new one, as similar as possible, and she hadn't seen a thing.

"I never wrote this, Liz… never!" Max still swore, his grip almost painful as he cupped her face in his hands, but he needed her to listen to him and trust him now more than ever. "God, baby, didn't you know even back then just how much I love you?… I couldn't have been with anyone else… not then, not ever… no matter what could happen between us… I mean, I can't even look at another woman… you're everything to me, Liz! YOU… you, baby, no one else!" he declared fervently, tears blurring his vision as well as he saw her take in everything he was saying.

"But… but she said… " she stuttered nonetheless, her heart believing him, but her mind refusing to admit yet that she had let Tess Harding play her without suspecting a thing. She couldn't believe either that anyone could be so cruel and be ready to go to such lengths to destroy her family just to get what they wanted.

"She lied… whatever she said, she lied… the fuc-… god, I'm gonna kill her!" he growled through gritted teeth, hoping that Tess would stay clear of him for as long as she could, or he would truly murder her.

"So you n-never…" Liz choked out, her voice breaking as she realized what all this meant.

"Never, ever!" Max answered and even if she didn't finish her sentence, she didn't need to.

It was clearly written all over her face the second she understood that he had never laid a finger on Tess, that he had never loved her, or been intimate in any way with her.

And as much as Max was literally seething with rage inside, the instant he noticed the expression of horror that crossed Liz's face, he knew that his anger would have to be controlled and his murdering plans to wait. Because right then, Liz needed him more than ever and he had no intention to let her down this time.

He wasn't expecting such a breakdown however, and his heart shattered into pieces at her despair.

"O-Oh… oh, m-my god… what… what have I done?… M-Max… oh, god!… no, no… god!… no!" she cried, stumbling away from him with agonizing sobs, but Max gently grabbed her by the wrist before she could go too far.

"Shhh… shhh… sweetie… it's alright… shh… it's gonna be okay!" he soothed tenderly, holding her tighter when she tried to pull free. There was no way he was going to let her go away from him now, not in this state.

"No… n-no… what ha-have I-I done?… what have I-I…" she repeated on and on, doubling over almost in pain, and forcing Max to pull her as close to his body as he could.

"Liz… Liz… baby, look at me… look at me… it's gonna be okay, alright! It's okay, Liz!" he cajoled, one arm firmly wrapped around her waist as her body was racked with tremors, while his other hand caressed her face and tried to stop the flow of tears.

"She knew things… she said… she s-said… you wanted a … a b-baby with… with her… and that was… why… why you refused me!… how could sh-she have known a-about that?" she wailed, shaking her head as if she was trying to make sense of all this mess, and yet refused to let herself truly believe that it had all been for nothing.

"I'm so sorry, baby… so sorry… I… I-I trusted her… I mean… we talked about it… and yes, I told her you wanted me to think about it… but god, I never thought… I can't believe she did that… I-I can't believe I didn't see anything!" Max grunted in pain himself, but at least he was partially relieved when he drew her into the safe confines of his arms and this time she stopped fighting him.

Her own arms wrapped around him, holding him like her very own life depended on it, and Max was very well aware that it was probably only because they were clinging to each other that she hadn't already collapsed to the floor.

God, what the hell had he done? he groaned inwardly. All of this was only his own fault. By trusting her, he had given Tess all the ammunitions she needed to destroy them. She knew exactly what to use to hurt Liz in the worst way possible and make sure that she would doubt him, doubt his faithfulness.

He shuddered as he thought about what could have happened if that woman hadn't gotten in that accident. He had been determined to talk to Liz even before that, but what if he hadn't been able to get through her then? What if he hadn't learned what he had tonight? Max wasn't convinced that they would have gotten to this point, that they would have made love, if they hadn't been both so emotional.

Maybe Liz would have been impermeable to his arguments then, maybe she would have not wanted to listen to him and she would have still kept for her what had happened with Tess, and he wouldn't have known. He would have been left just as in the dark as he had been for the last months.

He couldn't even imagine what would have happened if they hadn't been able to talk to each other and had gotten divorced all for the wrong reasons, all because of some stupid lies.

So much made sense now, her attitude that day she had asked him to leave, her words, this morning. That was what she had meant when he had exploded and asked her when she had become such a bitch. 'Maybe when I realized you have to be one to catch your own husband's interest', she had been referring to Tess and he hadn't understood a thing.

At that instant, pain squeezed his heart at the thought of all he had almost lost, his wife, his daughter, his life, all because he had been too blind and too trusting. All because he had seen Tess as a friend, an ally, when all the time she had truly been the enemy. Working against him, against what he really wanted, without caring about anything but her own needs and desire.

"She s-said… you wanted a b-baby with her…" he heard Liz reiterate and could clearly see just how much it had devastated her to think that he could have wanted that with any other woman.

Even if he probably didn't know the half of it yet, it had to have ripped her heart apart to imagine that he could have considered that with Tess, when he seemed so hell bent to wait with her, and his throat clogged with renewed tears as he imagined the agony she had endured.

"Liz… I swear you're the only woman I've ever made love to… you're the only one I've ever had a baby with… and I don't plan to change those facts… you'll always be the only one, sweetheart… you're the one, Liz… the only one!" Max vowed, holding her like he was afraid that despite all his sincere words, he would lose her nonetheless if he didn't.

"M-Max…"Liz whimpered still, pain slicing her own heart and making it more and more difficult for her to breathe properly.

"Shh… it's gonna be alright, sweetie… I swear it's gonna be alright now… I've got you…" Max whispered softly, cradling her against him before he picked her up and moved to the bed again. "Calm down, baby… and breathe, okay?" he coaxed her gently once they were settled down, all along stroking her back lovingly while she still seemed to fight to gulp for air.

"Yeah… that's it… see, it's okay…" he murmured when he noticed her breathing evening out and though she had yet to stop crying, he guessed that it was at least a good start.

"I'm s-sorry, M-Max… I'm so… s-sorry…" Liz sobbed achingly, wishing she could crawl inside of him and forget how much it hurt.

"Hey, no… shh, it's okay… it wasn't your fault, sweetness… you didn't know… shh… don't cry…" Max kissed her temple and reassured her softly, not minding in the least that she was almost cutting his air supply with the way she held on to him.

"God, I love you so damn much, Liz!" he breathed out hoarsely minutes afterwards when she released him, fingers tucking her disheveled hair away, lips caressing her wet cheeks where the evidence of her crying was still visible.

"I-I love you, too!" Liz reciprocated, the words barely audible though as his mouth closed over hers, his tongue eagerly demanding entrance and mating with hers when she granted it.

And to think that they could have missed, that they could have lost, all this, just because he had let Tess Harding enter their lives.

"W-What?" Liz whispered out when they parted seconds afterwards and Max took a few minutes to just drink her in, eyes roaming lovingly over her face while his fingers trailed over its soft contours.

"Just… I… even crying, you're still the most beautiful woman I've ever seen!" he murmured, a edge of wonder in his voice, like he was once more struck with how lucky he was to have her.

"I'm not!" Liz denied shyly, ducking her head in reaction. No matter how many times she could hear him say the same thing, she just couldn't get used to it.

"Yes, you are… and so much more!" Max insisted tenderly, seeking her lips soon after again and pouring all his love in that kiss.

How they ended up lying on the bed with Liz's body molding into Max's they didn't know, but none of them seemed to mind the change of position. Quite the opposite. For long minutes, they just laid there, kissing, caressing exposed skins, enjoying their closeness again, until Liz was suddenly struck with a thought and she pulled away from Max, sitting up until she was straddling his abdomen.

"Wait a minute… I-I … I j-just don't understand… I mean… if you didn't know… I-I…… if you didn't understand why I wanted you to leave… why did you tell me you did?… and why did you leave?" she pondered out loud, realizing that considering what he had told her now, considering the fact that he had never had anything to do with Tess, at least not in a romantic way, none of his reactions of the last few months made sense anymore. "Max?"

He heard her call his name in question when he sit up as well but took too long to answer, and as she looked at him quizzically, he couldn't help but cringe and gulp audibly.

This was the moment of truth, he thought, panic and fear gnawing at his insides again. During those moments were he had been there comforting her, he had let himself forget that Tess hadn't been their only problem. That there had been so much more that still stopped them from being together, like before. His relationship with Tess had been a complete fabrication, a huge misunderstanding, but what had happened between Kyle and Liz was real, too real.

He had heard them, seen their closeness, and now he would finally know if Kyle was more important to her than him, than their marriage, or what had happened between them tonight. And as much as part of him wanted to be kept in the dark some more, if only to not suffer even more than what he already had, he knew he couldn't. He had done so for so long, and hadn't gained anything for all that in the end. If there was still a chance for them to let go of the past and save their relationship, it was now… or never.

"B-Because of Kyle." He expelled eventually after having let out a long suffering sigh first, but he obstinately refused to look at her as he did.

With his eyes cast down, he felt more than he saw Liz tensing up again, and his heart immediately dropped down to his stomach. His breath caught in his throat and he willed his body to stop trembling but he knew it was no use.

"Kyle?… what the hell does Kyle have to do with this?" Liz queried astounded, her voice raising involuntarily as she wondered how Kyle Valenti could have played any part in their relationship, or how he could have led Max to leave their house if that wasn't what he wanted.

"I-I know, Liz…" Max said softly, admitting that much being probably one of the hardest things he had had to do. There wasn't any way they could ignore that factor now, even if the 'Tess issue' had been apparently solved, he couldn't pretend anymore, or bury his head in the sand any longer.

"You know?" Liz parroted, still as much in the dark as she had been a few seconds ago.

"But it… it doesn't matter anymore… r-right?" he had meant it like an affirmation, but instead the words came out as a question, tainted with all the insecurities he still felt, showing just how scared he was of whatever answer she would give to that. Yes, she had said she loved him, too, only a couple of minutes ago, but would that be enough now? "It doesn't… I mean… "

"What doesn't, Max?" Liz asked as gently as she could considering how agitated he seemed to grow suddenly. She didn't understand the first thing about his reaction, but some gut instinct told her that once she would, she would wish she hadn't known.

"Y-You know… I saw you with him… and well… I-I mean… I heard you… and it all became pretty clear to me… and I-I understand… I mean, really I do, Liz… considering how I was with you… but… " he rushed out, knowing that if he didn't he wouldn't be able to say half of what he wanted to tell her, but he was cut short when Liz leapt off of him for the second time this night as realization dawned on her.

"Oh. Lord… you've got to be fucking kidding me!" she all but shrieked when she understood what he was telling her and what he wasn't, her whole body shaking all over as the horrendous truth of it all crashed down on her. All these months, all this time wasted and all for no reason, except their own stupidity. "This is not happening… I just know that this is. so. not. happening!"

"Liz?" Max called her softly, confusion written all over his features as he saw her pacing frantically in front of her again. He had expected her to look surprised that he knew, guilty maybe, but certainly not… so angry.

"So you saw me with Kyle, huh? … and we were what?… kissing?… going at it hot and heavy?" she stopped suddenly and all but spat out, much to Max's astonishment.

God, this had to be some kind of cosmic joke. It couldn’t be any other way. She didn't want to believe that they could have ruined their life so much and all for nothing.

"No… NO!" Max cried out the second he heard her, not needing some mental images of Liz and… god, he had already too much of them as it was. "I-I heard… I mean I heard him telling you that it was time to tell m-me… that you couldn't keep your relationship a secret to me any longer and… " he tried to explain, all the while keeping his eyes on Liz who had resumed her pacing.

"And you just thought that we were what? Together?… that I was cheating on you?… " she questioned angrily, wincing herself as she uttered those last words, hating in fact that she had to just say them, and yet one look at his expression was all she needed to know that that was exactly what he had been thinking. "I can't believe this!… god, no wonder Tess managed to do what she did… with the little faith we have in each other!" she fumed, raking trembling fingers through her hair like she just meant to pull it off all at once.

"Liz?" Max breathed her name once more, standing up finally when he heard the frustrated cry that tore from her lips.

All the pieces of the puzzle were finally falling together, and she didn't know anymore if she should laugh now, or just collapse and cry until she would have no tears left. Tess had not just decided one day that she wanted Max and that she would do all it took to have him, she had worked with what had been given to her.

Max, thinking that she was having an affair with Kyle, had probably confided in Tess, like he had obviously done with so many other things, and Tess, whether she had believed it or not, had come to her with all her lies, knowing that whatever her reaction would be, Max would most likely not protest much since he was already so angry with her and they were barely talking at all back then.

If Max had trusted her, she knew certainly more about her than what she could even imagine, and she just fed in her own insecurities, hitting just were it hurt, and the craziest of all things was that she had let her do that. She had been stupid enough to not look deeper, beyond the surface and what was presented to her, to not question Max's behavior when that was the first thing she should have done, and all had gone to hell from there on. And he had apparently done the same. God, they truly deserved each other.

Catching the expression of pure anguish on Max's face now, she drew in a sharp intake of breath and willed herself to calm down, wanting to explain to Max what he obviously still didn't understand.

"When did you hear us?… I mean Kyle and I?" she demanded more softly, even if she already more or less had an idea.

"I-I don't remember exactly, maybe a… maybe a month or so before I moved… I-I don't know… I… " he stammered, trying to bury the memory in his mind, having long decided that he didn't want to associate that particular event with the day he had saved her life, the day that had changed his life.

"In my classroom?" she continued as he confirmed what she had suspected.

It would have been hard for her to forget that day considering the following events. She remembered all too well how he had reacted the morning after, when she had finally realized that she couldn't go on like that, and decided to take Kyle advice and talk to him, only to have him lash out at her, spewing things that she had not understood back then with the elements she had.

Max had seemed furious, hurt, he hadn't even slept in their bed that night, and she hadn't had any clue as to why. Now she did however, now she understood why he had seemed so disgusted when she had told him that she needed him, why he had said that he couldn't even look at her, why he had looked so angry and acted so strangely that last time they had made love, and she couldn't deny her part of responsibility. If she had talked to him sooner, if only she hadn't been so scared, they wouldn't have had to endure all this.

"Yeah!" Max confirmed, though she would have most likely not heard him, hadn't he been standing so close to her.

"Max… whatever you think you heard… it was definitely not what it looked like!… we weren't talking about us because there is no us!… and there never was!" Liz declared, seeing exactly why he could have thought so given what she recalled of that particular conversation she had had with Kyle, and knowing that Max probably needed to hear the truth out loud as much as she had needed it earlier.

"You don't mean…" Max croaked out, afraid to let his mind acknowledge the reality.

As much as he wanted to think that Liz had never strayed from their vows like he had believed, the truth was just so ludicrous that he wasn't sure it wouldn't be better to act like he hadn't heard a thing, to keep pretending that it had all really happened and just tell her that he had already found it in him to forgive her and forget.

"That's exactly what I mean!" Liz stated thickly, dispelling any doubt he could still have had.
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:19 am, edited 1 time in total.
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RebeccaBehrEvans
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Of course many things still didn't add up, like her behavior the couple of months before he had seen her with Kyle, or like what was the true nature of their relationship and what that conversation meant if they had not been talking about them as a couple. Things that he just couldn't figure out yet, but if Liz assured him that there was absolutely nothing between them, he could only trust her and believe her. Besides, given her agitation now, he couldn't think that she would be lying to him.

"Oh, fucking shit!" he growled, feeling suddenly nauseous and taking a few steps back.

He winced slightly then when his hip connected a little too violently with Liz's dressing table, but the physical blow couldn't compare with what he was feeling inside. His eyes remained trained on Liz however, and he felt chills coursing up his spine when he heard her give a forced nervous laugh, the sound like nothing he had ever heard before.

"This just has to be some bad joke… some kind of really bad, weird… twisted nightmare and I-I just know that I'm going to wake up soon because I really don't think I can see the end…" she cried out and Max noticed immediately just how close to losing it again she was. "What's gonna happen next, huh?… aliens are going to invade the freaking Earth and… and ask us to give up our daughter because she's the destined mate of some … King of another planet… and then… then what?… we're going to discover that she's not even our biological daughter and that she's only the bi-product of some… some alien and human mixed DNA cocktail that was implanted in me without my knowledge?… god, e-even that couldn't be more…stupid… and c-crazy… and so totally surreal than this!" she started rambling completely incoherently, her hands flaring wildly around her, and Max would have certainly laughed if the situation hadn't been so dramatic.

"Could be best for her… considering her parents are obviously both first class idiots… at least that would ensure she wouldn't have inherited any of our genes." He mumbled before he could stop himself, his knuckles turning white though, as he gripped the edge of the furniture and tried to regulate his breathing before he would pass out himself.

"It's not funny, Max!" Liz snapped heatedly, staring at him like that was the last thing in the world he should have thought about saying.

"Well excuse me if I deal with this my own way, love!" he retorted right away, his tone matching hers, before he lowered his voice again and sighed heavily. This was not her fault after all, he shouldn't take it out on her. "God… would you rather see me losing it and bawling like a baby, Liz?… because believe me, I'm not far from it and if I just as much as look at this seriously… let's just say that it's not going to be a pretty sight!" he pursued croakily when she looked at him, and her gaze softened some, obviously noticing that this was affecting him just as much. He was just trying to not let her see how it killed him inside.

Max knew though that if he started to think too much about all that had happened, he wouldn't be able to hold it together much longer. It was already hard enough as it was, considering that he couldn't very well ignore the fact that they wouldn't have found themselves in this situation if he hadn't assumed the wrong thing to begin with, or if he had just gone and talked to her instead of hiding behind his fears and anger.

Of course it didn't change the fact that he would have probably never left her, even thinking that she was being unfaithful, but at least it would have spared him the heartache, as well as to her.

"It's just that… I just wish we hadn't… j-jumped to conclusions like this! God, Max, what did we do?" all her own irritation seemed to suddenly deflate at his words and her face contorted in pain, making Max ache with her.

"Shh… I know… believe me, I know!" in two quick strides he was by her again, gathering her to him and comforting her as best as he could in his own state.

"Max… we just lost so much time… we just…" Liz whined brokenly, her eyes welling up with tears again, even when she knew that if she just started, she would probably not stop any time soon.

"We'll make up for it, I promise!" Max stated as convincingly as he could, swearing inwardly that there wouldn't be a time from then on when he would doubt her again, or let her forget that she was the only woman who truly mattered to him. And that she would always be.

She was the center of his universe, the love of his life, and he would do his best to remind her of that fact every day of the rest of their existence.

"And Janelle… she shouldn't have had to go thro-…" Liz went on nonetheless, only to be cut off by Max again.

"For her, too, baby." he insisted, pulling away and pressing a tender kiss to her lips to silence her. "I promise you everything will be alright!" he repeated as he wrapped her in his arms again, and then kept whispering sweet words of love into her ear until he felt her stop trembling.

"You thought I was with Kyle… that's why… that's why you said I-I was the one spread-" Liz moaned out of the blue, her voice so hoarse that there wouldn't have been any way for Max to miss just how much those few words thrown in the heat of the moment had hurt her.

"Shh… shh… I'm sorry… god, I'm so sorry… I didn't mean it, okay… I swear I didn't… " Max cradled her face gently so she would meet his eyes and know how sincere he was, but it didn't stop him from cursing himself once more as he remembered just how mean he had been this morning. "It's just… hearing you say you wanted to leave me… it hurt so much, Liz… and I just lost it… I know you're not like that… god, I know that… but when I saw you with him that day… it just broke my heart and… and this morning…"

"Why didn't you leave?" Liz cut him off mid-sentence this time, the way he looked at her not leaving any doubt that he meant what he was telling her now, but she needed to know why he had stayed with her then if he truly thought she was seeing someone else.

"What?" Max uttered, stroking her cheekbones absently.

"If you thought I was with Kyle… why didn't you leave me?" Liz elaborated some more, lifting troubled eyes up to him now and making him go weak in the knees.

Taking her by the hand, Max moved to the bed once more and let her step between his legs once he had sat down. His thumbs just drew small circles over the back of her hands for a while, like he was trying to draw strength from the contact, and then, after having inhaled sharply, he took the plunge, knowing that he couldn't give her anything but the truth.

"Because I couldn't really blame you for something I knew I was mostly responsible for, I guess… and because no matter what… I'll rather be with you… even under such circumstances… than be without you!" the words were whispered so low that Liz had to strain her ear to understand everything, but what was evident was the pain still behind them.

She wanted to tell him how sorry she was herself that she hadn't hold on more to their love then, that she hadn't given him a chance to explain himself and instead had asked him to leave the second she had doubted him, but whatever she was going to say was lost in the moment when glistening amber pools met her own tearful ones again.

"God, I know I have still so much to make up for to you… I know that and I will… and I'm not just talking about these last few months… but for the last couple of years… I know I-I wasn't there for you… but I'll slow down… I swear to you that I will… I… I'll spend less time in the office, I promise… and no more business trips… not if I can do otherwise… I'll talk to Alex about that and…" Max started to make plans, promises that he hoped she knew he intended to keep, but she interrupted him once more, her voice soft but definitely skeptical.

"Max… you know that's not possible…" as much as she wanted to believe him and hold him on to that, she knew well that he didn't really have much choice in the matter. He went where the business called him, and that meant many trips that took him away from her. She had hoped at first that it would only be temporary, but she had long understood that it went with the job and having his own firm, and that unless he quitted, she would just have to get used to it, and that no matter how much she actually hated it.

"I'll make it possible… I'll find a way… I just want to be with you and Janelle… and I'll do my best to be home early every night… even if I have to bring some work here… but at least I'll be with you…" Max didn't let her answer deter him, promising himself that whatever it took, he wouldn't let anything come between them ever again, and certainly not his job.

"Max…" Liz protested weakly once more, but Max pulled her to him before she could say much more, helping her so that she was now straddling his lap.

"I will find a way, baby… trust me!" he said decisively, brushing his lips over hers until any thought of fighting him on that left her mind.

Moments afterwards they were both lying on the bed again, enjoying the sudden silence, Liz resting her head on his hard chest and caressing his side leisurely.

"Max? if… if you…" she started hesitantly after a while, wondering why she was imposing this on herself, why she wanted to know more about the woman she now hated more than she had ever thought possible, but she just had to ask.

"If I what?… tell me!" Max encouraged her gently, his fingers dancing at the nape of her neck and making Liz feel so relaxed that it was a wonder she was still able to think at all.

"If you're not… if you're not… with Tess… what is she doing at Isabel's?" she blurted out at last, but her eyes stayed fixed on Max's chest, like that was suddenly the most interesting thing in the world.

"How do you…? Did you talk to her?" Max was immediately on alert again, all but forcing Liz to look up at him.

After what he had learned tonight, the last thing he wanted was for her to talk to Tess, or even less to come anywhere near her. God, if he just heard that Tess had done anything to upset or hurt Liz again, he didn't care what time it was, he would go and hunt her down.

"Yeah… I-I couldn't join you on your cell, so I called and she answered and I-I thought…" Liz admitted, biting her bottom lip as she wondered if he was going to throw a fit again, or what. He didn't really looked calm to her right now.

Yet that was the last thing she still wanted him to clear out, even if now considering what she knew, she was convinced that the explanation would be a long way off from anything she could have conjured up in her mind ever since she had made that call.

"I wasn't there… there's been a flood in her apartment or something… at least that's what she told me… I'm not sure about anything anymore… but anyway… I told her that she could stay in the apartment until her problem was solved… but in the end, I decided to stay at Michael's in the meantime… but you don't have to worry about her… she's supposed to leave for a three weeks vacation tomorrow anyway… and when she comes back, she's in for a big surprise!" Max explained, his voice raising a few notches by the end of his speech.

Tess was just lucky that she wouldn't have to show up Monday morning if he had to go to work himself, because two days would certainly not be enough time for him to calm down. He wasn’t even sure that three weeks would help her.

For now, he kept quiet about what had happened that had led him to take that decision and made him stay away from her however, because in the state Liz was, he didn't think that she would take very well the fact that he had given Tess any opportunity to make a pass on him, or even less that he had been stupid enough to not see it coming.

He would tell her everything though, as soon as he would be sure that they could talk about it without the conversation causing her any pain whatsoever, not even the slightest.

"What are you going to do?" Liz couldn't help asking, even if Tess's fate at this point was the last of her worries, as long as Max got rid of her and that as fast as possible.

"What I have to… make her pay… but that'll have to wait… I think we really have a bigger problem right now!" Max told her vaguely before rolling them over so he was on top now.

"We do?" Liz questioned, quite surprised, though she could tell by the way he was staring at her that whatever he was going to say wasn't something that would hurt as much as everything else had already. Well, hopefully.

"Yeah… baby, somewhere along the way we apparently just stopped talking to each other… and trusting each other… I mean… a few years ago we would have never let this happen… never… and now we're really going to have to work on that, because I don’t want anything… and I really mean anything… coming between us ever again! I couldn't stand it… it-it would just kill me… I couldn't feel like I… like I'm losing you again… I b-barely survived the first time… I just… couldn't… " his voice was quivering by the time he finished, his whole body was trembling slightly again, but he knew that this had to be said. He just couldn't imagine them going through something like that again just because they weren't able to communicate, and he wasn't sure they would find each other again, or just get out of it unscathed if they did. "Do you think you could do that with me, baby?"

There was so much heartache in his tone, and at the same time so much insecurity that a huge lump formed in Liz's throat and she wasn't able to do much more but nod mutely. All this time she had thought he had been happy with the one he really wanted to be now, when in reality he had just been as miserable as she had been herself. If not more in fact, at least she didn't have any clear image of him and Tess wrapped in a tight embrace, whether it was a friendly one or not. She didn't even want to think about how many times that picture of Kyle and her had come back to haunt him then.

"So if we have any doubts… however insignificant they are… we should just tell the other… and really talk about it! No more secrets… no more lies, or… or pent-up feelings, or whatsoever… okay?" he went on when she acquiesced, wanting to establish some new ground rules right away before they tried to solve anything else.

They had spent too much time before bottling up everything inside, what they really thought, what they felt, what they wanted, if they wished to make it work this time around, they needed to be always honest with each other, to trust each other and most of all talk to each other.

"Yes." Liz whispered, sealing their promise with a few soft kisses that said so much more then than any words could have.

When they parted, they held on to each other, relishing in the contact as much as in the loving words they exchanged, until Max acknowledged that if they wanted to be honest, they should as well start right now. And there was something he really wanted to understand.

"Baby, do you want to talk about it? … I mean, can you tell me what Kyle and you were talking about that day?" he queried quietly, but he instantly felt her tense in his embrace, and almost immediately regretted having asked. "It's okay, you don't have to if you don't want!" he was quick to add, not wanting to push her, even if he was truly dying to know.

As long as he was sure that she wasn’t intimately involved with Kyle, he guessed that he could wait, a least some more, until she would be willing to talk about what had really been going on that day.

"It's not that… it's just… I don't want to hurt you!… I-I… I d-don't want you to hate me!" Liz answered tremulously, wanting more than anything to tell him everything but now was probably not the right moment. Not after the night they had both already had.

"Liz, I love you… don't you ever forget that again, okay?… I've been in love with you my whole life, and it won't ever change, no matter what!" Max whispered back tenderly, the emotions in his words matching the look of pure love he was giving her.

And she knew. She knew everything he was saying was true, but that didn't stop her from being scared, or being afraid of what his reaction would be. She remembered all too well how much it had hurt her, how much it still hurt sometimes even months later, she wasn't sure he was ready to go through the same pain right then, or even less if she was ready herself to walk down that road with him again now.

"I know… it's just… Max, can we talk about this later… I don't think I could…" she expelled at last, shuddering just at the thought of what that conversation would do to both of them. She hated even more that she wasn't able to give him the answers he wanted right away, but she truly thought that it was for the best.

"Sure… whenever you're ready, love." Max conceded easily, the last thing he needed being for her to feel like he wanted to corner her, or control her already, the very first day that they were back together.

Now that he thought of it, he remembered clearly having heard her say more or less the same thing to Kyle that day, that he would hate her if he knew, but he couldn't see what she could have done that would have made him feel that way about her. Even when he thought she was with Kyle, he couldn't, so she was probably exaggerating some and flipping for nothing. Whatever it was, he was sure now that it couldn't be that terrible, so for the time being he would leave it at that and let her come to him when she would be ready.

Deciding that they would have enough time to really discuss everything anyway, he lay down again, resting his head over her bosom, and for a very long time, he just stayed there, contented for the first time in a very long while, savoring the feel of her fingers running slowly through his hair.

There couldn't be anything in the world that could feel better than this. Being with Liz. So close that he could hear her heartbeat thudding in his ear. His arm wrapped tightly around her. His body nestled between her thighs. Intimate, even if not yet one completely.

No, nothing could top this… except maybe…

"Liz?" her name spilled from his lips in a breathy murmur that barely cut through the comfortable silence surrounding them.

"Yes?" Liz answered just as softly, but not stopping in her ministrations until he propped himself on his elbows and regarded her with his heart in his eyes.

"Can I come back home, baby? … F-For good, I mean!" he demanded in a trembling whisper, and Liz just about broke down again.

God, he looked so much like the little boy she remembered then, shy, insecure and almost lost, though she couldn't recall having ever seen him look so vulnerable at the same time before, like his whole life depended solely on her answer.

"No, you can't… " she breathed out thickly, the tears shimmering in her eyes mirrored in his, even if she managed a small smile when she caught the expression on his face at her negative words. " You have to… because I don't think I would be able to live another single day without you!"

The smile she received herself in return could have probably lit up the whole house -or just maybe made him look like a complete demented fool- but she wouldn't have traded it for anything in the world at that instant, and just knowing that she was the cause of such breathtaking sight left her feeling all giddy inside.

"Thank you!" he panted hoarsely, seeking her lips almost immediately afterwards and truly feeling like his heart would just burst out from the sheer joy he felt then.

"M-Max…" Liz moaned out when she felt his tongue trail down her neck seconds later, as at the same time one of his hands crept under his shirt.

"I love you!" Max came back to nibble at her bottom lip, tugging gently on it and bringing forth a low needy groan from her mouth. "Let me show you how much!"

At that instant, those few words became the only thing that mattered to both of them as they got lost in the feel of each other again, and Liz was all too ready to let him worship her body and make her remember how much he did love her, even if it hadn't been so long yet now that he had proved that to her.

Still, there was no way she would have protested when very slowly Max unbuttoned the shirt that was clearly on his way, his lips constantly searching for more skin to taste, and it was definitely not long before she was helping him out of his boxers and letting him slide back home. Where he belonged.
*
It couldn't have been more than a couple of hours later when Liz opened her eyes again, yet she felt so invigorated that it felt like she had been asleep for days. She didn't think that she had ever felt better in fact.

Leisurely, she stretched out, rolling slightly onto her side and instantly seeking for Max's warmth, when the only thing she felt was the empty space where he should have been and she instantly froze.

It started slow, a small disturbing feeling in the pit of her stomach, but spreading so fast that Liz was suddenly finding it very hard to even just take in her next breath.

Tears pooled in her eyes before she could control or stop herself and the next second, she bolted up right, gulping desperately for air, even if her efforts didn't seem to help in any way at that instant.

Her trembling fingers reached for the lamp at her bedside as at the same time her other hand clamped over her mouth in a futile attempt to stifle her sob, but even with that the small whimper could be heard through the heavy silence oppressing her.

"No… no, no, no…" she cried, throwing the sheet off her body and scrambling to her feet, the task being made all the more difficult since her legs seemed to have suddenly turned to jelly.

Her steps were unsteady as she all but ran to the bathroom, praying with all her might that she would find him there, and in her haste to reach her goal, she didn’t even paid attention to the small details that could have reassured her right away. Like the fact that the sheets were warm where Max had still been lying minutes ago, or the fact that she was naked under the shirt she was wearing when she shouldn't have been if she had really just been imagining the whole night, or simply that the water was running audibly when she approached the bathroom door.

Her hand was shaking fearfully when she reached for the doorknob, her heart pounding in her ears, but before her fingers even connected with it, the door flew open and with a sharp cry, she all but threw herself into Max's arms.

"Oh, god… Max…" she sobbed, her own arms winding around his waist and nearly squeezing the life out of him.

"Oh… wow… wow there…" Max chuckled, even as he stumbled backwards with the force of the sudden contact.

Not that he minded the closeness of course, but the last thing he had been expecting when coming out, was to find Liz there and obviously eager to attach herself to him again. At least if he judged by the fact that it had only been a couple of minutes since he had left her sleeping there, called into the bathroom by an urgent need, and had barely had time to wash his hands and open the door when she had come barreling into him.

It wasn't until he felt the wetness on his naked chest however, that he realized something was really off.

"Liz?… what?… what is it?" he questioned immediately, the second he understood that she wasn't exactly just happy to see him like he had first assumed, but was actually upset and crying once more. "What's wrong, baby?"

"Nothing!" she mumbled, voice muffled by his broad chest as she clung to him for dear life. It was nothing at all now that he was there, now that she could touch him, feel him.

"Something obviously!… you're crying!" Max pulled away and framed her face, looking at her for any clue of what could explain what had her so worked up again.

"It-It's stupid!" Liz shook her head, feeling foolish now.

It was indeed ridiculous to have reacted so violently, she realized that now that her fear had been appeased. It had just happened too often before, and the feeling of emptiness she had felt at realizing that he wasn't by her side had been so overwhelming that she hadn't been able to think clearly.

"Tell me, love!" Max insisted, bracketing her hips and lifting her up until he had her settled down on the bathroom countertop. He then stepped between her legs and gently brushed her hair off her face so he could really see all of her, the gesture so tender that he nearly brought Liz to tears again, and she knew she couldn't not tell him.

"It's just that I woke up… and you weren't there… and I just thought… I-I thought it was all a dream again… and…" she tried to explain, but the words came out with difficulties, no matter how hard she tried to calm her racing heart.

"Oh, sweetie… didn't you listen to anything I told you before?… I'm here, and I've absolutely no intention to leave ever again or go anywhere… not without you!" Max reminded her softly, thinking that if she didn't get it yet, he would just have to work harder until she would feel completely secure again.

"I know, it's just that… for a second… " she started again, but Max didn't need to hear more to know what she meant.

"Shh… I understand, don't worry!" he cut her off, fingers pressing lightly on her lips, knowing exactly just how surreal it all still felt. He had had to resist the urge to pinch himself when he had woken up as well, so he couldn't really blame her. "Now, could you do something for me?"
Last edited by RebeccaBehrEvans on Mon Jan 07, 2008 2:22 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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