Long to Be (AU,M/L,MATURE) [COMPLETE]

[Bordersinsanity]

PART 11 ~ MARIA

“Get up already, Michael. I’m starving.” I don’t know when I became such a morning person. It slowly happened when we all came here to go to school. Max was pulling himself into this small little world and I was afraid that no one would be able to reach him if he continued down the road he was on so I started getting up early on the weekends.

We would go eat breakfast and then walk the streets just to get out and see things. We didn’t necessarily talk about anything in particular but we just hung out. “Michael! Get up!” I jumped on the bed and practically shoved him off of it. “I’m hungry.”

“Why don’t you go get Max? He’s probably awake already.” He said to me as he rolled over and shoved his head underneath his pillow.

“Today is Saturday.” I say nonchalantly. “Besides, I’m hoping that he is somewhat already occupied.”

“Give it up Maria. There is no way that Maxwell took that girl home last night.” He rolled over and lifted the pillow off his head as he spoke. “We’re talking Max here. No way would he take a girl he just met to his apartment.”

“Michael, I’m hungry and if you get up now we can come back and have some more fun.” He grabbed me and I couldn’t help but let out a squeal from him catching me off guard.

“We can have fun now.” He whispered into my ear as he went for my neck. He knows what nibbling on my neck does to me.

“But I’m hungry now Michael and if you don’t feed me I won’t have enough energy to participate in the fun.” I was whining. He hates it when I whine which is all the more reason to do it. “Pretty please…” I was resorting to begging. He still had me wrapped up in his arms and he was still nibbling on my neck. “Michael, sweetie. Please. Take me to breakfast before there’s nothing left of me.”

I finally feel his arms loosen around me as his head slumps back on the pillow. “Fine.” He gave up any and all attempts of trying to seduce me into staying at home. “You realize that this was my last night off until next weekend. No more… Harry still hasn’t found a replacement for Matt so I’m covering the extra hours.” His eyes take on a teasing gleam, “You’re going to be on your own to…”

I smack him in the head before he can finish the thought, “You are so disgusting. I would never…. Ugh, you just sealed your fate, you’re taking me to breakfast now.”

“Aah, you know you like it when I talk…” I stop him with a kiss. “I know.” I started out saying “but I’m hungry and I don’t want you to have to cook for me so let’s go out.” I really wanted to run by Liz’s and see if she was home. It would look strange for me to show up on Max’s doorstep on Saturday when everyone knows that we go out on Sundays.

Michael worked nights so he could go to school during the day. He was night watchman for the campus security. We were lucky that he could get the job because who better than a security guard to know the comings and goings of students. It pays for his schooling and a little extra too. He likes it. He’s never been one to have a typical normal job. Well, if you don’t count the time he used to be a short order cook at my mom’s restaurant.

“Okay. Give me ten and I’ll be ready to go.” I leaned up and kissed him.

“Thanks sweetie, who knows, I might play hooky from one of my morning classes and make it up to you.” I wiggled my eyebrows up and down. It was a habit that I picked up from Alex a long, long time ago and I hated how I did it without even thinking about it.

“Whatever. I want you to remember this the next time I want to do something and you want to lay in bed.”

“You’re the best and I know you won’t let me forget this.” He gets up off of me and walks over to the bathroom. He has such a gorgeous body and I lay here and admire his nakedness before he disappears behind the closed bathroom door. I thought getting him out of bed was going to be the easy part but it turned out to be harder than I expected.

He knows me too well and I know he knows that I am planning on going over to Liz’s. I’ll just take him to the IHOP that’s right down the street from the dorms that way I can just swing by and say hi to Liz. I hope she’s not there. I so want her and Max to get together.

“Come on. Let’s go! You were in such a hurry to go eat breakfast I can’t imagine you lying there for too much longer.” I was thinking of the ways that I could get him to stop by the dorms without him realizing that that was my whole intentions in the first place. I was too wrapped up in my plan that I hadn’t even realized that he was out of the shower and was dressed already.

I climb out of bed and grab my purse and keys. He’s waiting by the door when I walk out of the bedroom. “Have I told you how much I looooovvvvvvve you today?” I said as I leaned up and kissed him quickly.

“No, but you can and just so you know… I’m not stopping by the dorms.” Damn.

I stomp my feet up and down because I wasn’t expecting him to come right out and call me on my ulterior motive of wanting to go out and eat breakfast. “Why not? I won’t be long. I just have to know if she’s there or not.”

“And what if she is there?” He asks.

“She can come eat breakfast with us.” I didn’t know what I would do if she were there.

“No.”

“Michael, I know you still don’t know what to think about her but I can assure you that she wasn’t her normal self last night. The Liz you saw last night isn’t the same one that I’ve been hanging out with for the past few weeks.” It was weird. The Liz last night wasn’t as sure about herself as she usually was.

“That’s what you said last night and I understand it Maria but only I can make up my own mind and no matter how much you plead her side of the story it just doesn’t jive. She’s holding something back.”

“Maybe, she just doesn’t do well with large groups of strange people.” He opens the door and holds it open for me to go through. “Remember how Alex and Kyle acted and they knew you guys. They acted weird for like the first few months.”

“Maria that was different. They knew we were different and that’s the reason they were acting different.” He looked at me and pinned me with his glare. “She doesn’t know about us does she? You should have told me about her sooner that way I could have been keeping an eye on her dorm. See if she had visitors at odd times.”

“NO! She doesn’t know about you guys. What, just because I blabbed to my two best buds you think I would tell a total stranger.” I stomp off leaving him to lock the door and follow me. I would never ever tell a stranger although I have a feeling that Max will tell Liz all in good time.

I flash back to when I first met Liz.

It’s hard to explain. Michael was working one night and I was sleeping all alone at home and I had this strange dream. There was Michael, Isabel, Max and Tess all standing in a circle and then in the middle there was this girl that I have never seen before in my entire life. She was lying on the ground and she was covered in webbing. It reminded me of the time when Michael was going through the balancing.

I cringe every time I think back on that period in time. We almost lost him and I really don’t like to think of losing him. Sure, he pisses me off most the time but that’s just the way we are. I didn’t have much of a home life and neither did he. Granted mine was much better than his was but it wasn’t typical. It wasn’t the same kind that Max and Isabel grew up with.

I get to the jetta and I let him know that I’m still fuming about him even thinking that I would have told a complete stranger our secret. I slam the passenger-side door and cross my arms in front of me. Make him suffer. I learned a long time ago that he hates it when I’m mad at him.

I don’t know what it was that made me have that dream but I got up and went out for a walk. It was early in the morning and maybe it was just me missing Michael but I went to the coffee shop around the corner. I ordered my hot chocolate… I’m not too fond of coffee, love the smell but hate the taste and besides its not good for the aura. I hung around Kyle too much for a brief point in my life, if you’re wondering where the aura thing came from.

Anyway, I get my hot chocolate and grab the club chair in the corner and look out the huge window that overlooked the street. California was different than New Mexico as far as being able to see the stars, both of them had their drawbacks but this was home and would continue to be home for a little while longer.

So there I was sitting in the chair drinking my hot chocolate when the bell above the door jingles. I look up wanting to see what kind of person is up at five in the morning. I’m almost expecting Max but I knew that he wouldn’t be on this side of town at this time of the day. I about fell out of the chair when I saw who had walked in, the girl from my dream.

Now I don’t believe in destiny, because the four aliens that I’ve grown to love had a predestined destiny and they have all chose to ignore it. Max said it best. “The future is to be determined. We make our own destiny.” So I was having a hard time believing that this was meant to be.

She takes a look around and she immediately notices me staring at her. I quickly look down to my hot chocolate that I have and hope that she doesn’t get weirded out. A few minutes later she’s standing beside the empty chair that is next to the one that I’m sitting in and she’s asking, “Is it okay if I sit here?”

I look up at her and nod my head up and down. I didn’t own the chair and if she wanted to sit beside me that was fine. “I couldn’t sleep.” She began before she even sat down. “I feel like I’ve been hit by a freight train.” She takes a drink of her vanilla cinnamon latte and sits down beside me. We sit like that for what seemed like forever.

I realized that time stood still because I was anticipating the worst. Here I was sitting in a deserted coffee shop, with my alien boyfriend clear across town, talking with a girl that was in my dream. “Hi, I’m Liz Parker.” She said as she held out her hand to introduce herself to me.

“Maria…” I shook her hand but didn’t offer her my last name. I was a little hesitant with giving out too much information.

“You look like you do this often.” She said before she took another sip of her hot coffee.

“Not too often. I just had this really weird dream tonight and I couldn’t go back to sleep. So if I’m not sleeping I might as well ingest caffeine.” I too took another sip.

“Oh,” I don’t know if she was going to continue or not. I mean it sounded like she was trying to strike up a conversation but then it quickly died. I took in her attire and noticed that she was wearing a huge coat. Not a coat that natives would wear during the winter months here in “sunny California”.

“You just move here?” I asked her.

“Yeah,” She offered as she continued to look out the window with a far away look on her face.

“Where did you come from?”

She startled out of her stare and looked at me. “Excuse me?”

“Where did you live before you moved here?” I rephrased.

“Oh, Connecticut. New Hampshire, Connecticut. How about you? Where are you from?”

“Roswell, New Mexico.” I tell her. What could it hurt? She seemed nice enough and I always thought I was a good judge of character so I answered a few of her questions.

It was my turn. “What made you move to California?”

“I don’t know. Something. It’s really hard to explain without me sounding crazy.” I nodded my head to show that I understood and that I wouldn’t be making fun of her. I knew how some things just sounded crazy and there was no possible way of making the truth sound not crazy. I knew aliens existed and I was in love with one so needless to say when someone says that what they’re about to say may sound crazy I knew that it wasn’t anything compared to my life.

“Do you believe in reincarnation?” She starts out saying. I gawk at her. Was she for real and that’s when I notice that she’s not even looking at me anymore. She’s looking out the large bay window that over looks the street. “Most people don’t and I wouldn’t even bring this up but I have a feeling that you won’t think I’m crazy.” She finally turns her head at me and I compose myself the best that I can.

“Anything’s possible.” I finally say realizing that she’s looking to me for an answer to her first question. “So you believe that you are reincarnated.” I sit up from the lounging position that I was previously sitting in.

“Yeah,” I smile at her and she smiles back. “I’ve been to dozens of psychiatrists and none of them can explain why I have memories of another life.”

“You remember your other life?” This was good. I wonder what time period she had lived in?

“I was a queen.” She looks down into her cup of coffee as if her answers were written in there somewhere. “My father was a great king, everyone loved him and he protected me from being harmed. I had guards that protected me and there was one that I loved so very much. He was on some type of military exchange between my father’s country and his, he was in training so one day he would be able to rule his country but we loved each other.”

“And…” She just stopped as if she was caught up in the memory. She really did believe that she had lived another life.

“I was killed on our wedding day just after we kissed and that’s all I know.” She looks up to me with tears in her eyes. “I’m here to find him, my other half. Do you believe in soul mates, Maria?” She dabbed at her eyes.

“I don’t know. I think you’re asking the wrong person, Liz. I believe in love but the kind of love that you’re talking about. The kind of love that surpasses time I’m not so sure I believe in.” I thought back to Max and Tess. They had been married in their previous life and even their love didn’t transcend time and space.

“You don’t think I’m crazy?” She asked with a worried look on her face.

“No, girl. You’re not crazy. In fact, I think I might be able to help you out.”

“How?”

“I know this guy.” She interrupts me.

“I don’t want to be set up Maria. There’s no one here that will ever be my soul mate.”

“Girl, anything’s possible.” I stood up and sat my cocoa cup on the table in front of me. “How about we go shopping. When I’m sad and depressed I go shopping. Just think of it as a way to get your mind off of him. You know, who ever he is.” I leaned over and grabbed her hand.

“Okay… but isn’t it kind of early to go shopping?” She had a point but I didn’t care. Maybe it was my connection with the alien abyss, by something about Liz’s story just seemed to draw me in. She needed a friend and I was bound and determined to be hers.

Michael stopped the car and I was shaken from my memory of meeting Liz that very first time. “If you’re going to go you better get going. I’m not waiting out here all day.” I looked to where we were and noticed that we were outside the dorms on Taylor Street. I turned back and smiled at Michael.

I leaned over and kissed him. “Thanks. I’ll just be a minute.” I hurry out of the car and curse for being fashion conscious. Clogs were not made for running.

I push through the glass doors and make my way to Liz’s dorm room. “Please, don’t be here.” I repeat over and over. I knock on the door and wait. Her not answering was a good sign. It meant that she wasn’t in and that maybe she didn’t come home. I knock again just to be sure but with Michael I know my time is very limited. I see the note that I had left on her door from yesterday. I quickly erase it and put a new one on.

Liz ~
Breakfast… deli… I want details.
~M

She knew how to get a hold of me and she knew what I wanted. I hadn’t known the girl for that long but the past three weeks I feel like I know her pretty well. She reminded me a lot of Max. I hope he found her last night and the more I thought about it the more I began to worry. What if Max didn’t find her? Where was she now? I was itching to dial Max’s number to find out but I knew I better not. He would be embarrassed as hell if he did bring her home. I can wait. I added a few more squiggles that were uniquely me, and left.

Michael was happy that Liz wasn’t following behind me. “Where to next?” He asked. He must have figured that since Liz wasn’t there that I would want to go to Max’s since we were so close.

“No, since you were nice and took me by here I’ll take you to breakfast now. I left her a message to call me as soon as she got home. With any luck I won’t hear from her until Monday morning.” I look at the smirk on Michael’s face and nudge him in the ribs, “Don’t give me that look, it could happen.” Michael just rolled his eyes in response so I lean over and give him another quick peck on the cheek, “Thanks for bringing me by.”

“Well, I would say that it was no problem but I won’t. Let’s just say that you owe me big time when we get home.” He started the Jetta and we were off to breakfast. Finally.

We pulled into the IHOP and got out. The crowd wasn’t too bad, yet. It was still early enough.

“I don’t know why you’re so hung up on her.” He stated as we sat down at the table.

“It’s kind of hard for me to put it into words. Let’s just say that it all happened because of a really weird dream I had one day.”

“What haven’t you told me?” He knows me too well.

“You’ve never asked how I met Liz. Why have you never asked me?”

“I figured you’d tell me when you were ready.” He looked the menu over. Why he was looking the menu over was beyond me. He knew what he was having; he was doing it to keep from looking at me.

“Michael…”

“What?” He finally looks up. “Okay. I saw the two of you in the coffee shop that morning. Matt came into work to turn in his notice and Harry sent me home early. I stop there every morning before going home. I saw the two of you talking and decided not to intrude. How many girlfriends do you have that you can be normal with? None. I wanted you to have something normal so I just kept my mouth shut.” He quickly ducked back behind the menu.

He was too sweet. “Michael, I’ve never complained. You don’t think I want normal do you? I love you and I mean all of you. You guys are my normal and I really don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have you all.” I reached for his hand and took it into mine.

“Well, now you know and how does meeting Liz have anything to do with a dream?” He looked over at me and waited for me to respond.

I quickly picked up my menu to get away from his piercing glare. “Maria…”

“Nothing. What are you having?” I asked hoping to change the subject.

“The usual. What are you not telling me?”

“Well, there’s something more behind me meeting Liz in the coffee shop that morning.”

“and…” I knew I wasn’t going to get out of this so I might as well just tell him.

The waitress coming to take our orders was a reprieve but the minute she was gone he was asking me again to tell him what I meant. “Fine…” I began. “You were at work and I was all alone.”

“Maria I know this part get on to the rest of it.” He scolded me.

“I’m getting there if you would just quit interrupting me.” I huffed and leaned back in my chair and crossed my arms over my chest. I looked anywhere and everywhere but at him.

“Maria, you know I’m not buying this… this mad thing that you’ve been doing all day and it’s not even nine o’clock.”

I ignore him and he starts messing with his silverware. The food finally arrives and he immediately starts to eat.

I push my eggs around a little, nibble a bit of my whole-wheat toast. I’m not really all that hungry anymore. I just happen to look up and I see no other but Max and Liz standing in line waiting to be the next to be seated. I couldn’t help but squeal. They looked so happy… so close.

“I knew it… I just knew it! Am I good or what?” I said a little too loudly at Michael. I start to wave my hands at Max, trying to get his attention.

I briefly saw Michael look at me and then go back as if I was acting normal. I knew what he was thinking. I’ve dated him for five years and I know what was going through that alien head of his. I chose to ignore him. There was no way that he was going to rain on my parade.

Everyone else in the restaurant noticed me so I know Max is purposefully ignoring me. "No way is he going to ignore me!" I snapped at Michael. I really wasn’t the world’s tallest woman so I would need some outside help to get them to see me so I jumped up on my chair and waved my arms frantically to get Max’s attention.

Max slowly turned around as if he wanted to be somewhere else. I can understand where he’s coming from. He waves and then ducks down to whisper something into Liz’s ear. I’m not sure what he is saying but I’m pretty sure that he’s embarrassed to even acknowledge me. She looks my way and waves at me. She has a smile on her face that brightens even wider when she sees me.

“That’s my girl.” I say out loud as I get down off my chair.

“If I were Max I would turn and bolt. I wouldn’t even turn around to see if you were chasing me.”

“Ha ha… very funny. They spent the night together, look at that glow. Just look at the two of them, they are a perfect match. Am I good or what?”

“Yeah, yeah, you said that already.” He shoveled more food into his mouth.

I couldn’t stand it any longer I had to go get them. “Oh, goody, goody, goody.” I had to hug my girlfriend first. Max could wait besides I wanted to make him squirm a little. He of so little faith in my match making, I’m still a little ticked at the way he and Tess acted last night but all was well. I made my way over to him and hugged him anyway. While he was bent over I couldn’t resist giving him a hard time. I knew Max well and I knew that he wasn’t one to act on the first date so I had to tease him. “How’s it feel to get laid?” I pull back from him and I have to squeal again because he’s actually turning red. Maybe I didn’t know him all that well after all. I grab hold of Liz’s hand and began to drag them to our table. “I knew the two of you were going to hit it off famously. I just knew it.”

I let them get settled in and Liz kept on giving Michael a strange look over the top of her menu. I kicked him from underneath the table to tell him that he was being rude to our guest.

“Damn it, Maria. Those clogs are going in the trash if you kick me again.”

“You’re being rude, Michael.”

“Hi, guys.” He finally said.

“Hey.” Max said quietly. He looked nervous to me. Maybe it was being in Liz’s company with the two of us watching their every move? Who knows? I’m just happy that another one of my matches works.

The waitress quickly comes to our table. I’m sure it has something to do with my behavior from earlier. It’s amazing what kind of service you get when the manager thinks you’re crazy and tells everyone to hurry us out because he doesn’t want another scene like the one I just displayed to happen again.

“She’ll have the short stack with a side of…” Max looked to Liz for some reason. “Scrambled?” She nodded her head yes. “Yes, add a side of scrambled eggs and I would like the same and could you bring me some Tabasco sauce too, please.” Max folded up the menu and then took Liz’s from her as she handed it to him.

I was smiling. He already knew what she liked to eat for breakfast. That is just too cute. “So, you’re ordering her food for her now?”

Max turned bright red again. “Maria.” I held up my hand to stop him from denying anything.

“No, no. That’s quite all right. I understand completely. It’s like being newly weds. No explanation needed.” My appetite suddenly reappeared and I started eating my western omelet.

Max and Liz’s breakfast came and I watched as the two of them prepared their food. Max had to send the waitress back for peanut butter and I was surprised that it was for Liz. That was Max’s favorite way of eating pancakes. They were more like each other than I realized. I about fell out of my chair when Liz took the Tabasco sauce and doused her eggs in it. I looked over to Michael and he sat there and watched as well. I’m sure he was thinking that she had to be crazy because no one ate Tabasco like that. No one not unless…

Both of our heads shot to Max. He looked up at us moments later. When Michael motioned ever so slightly towards Liz, Max shook his head a little. Liz continued to eat; she was still unaware of the silent communication that was occurring between the three of us.

“Excuse me, I’ll be right back.” Michael stood up and headed in the direction of the restrooms.

“Max…” I let the sentence hang and Max understood what I was wanting. “Could you…”

“Sure, I’ll go see what’s wrong.” Liz finally looked up from her food. “I’ll be right back.” He leaned over and kissed her. She smiled and when he was gone she looked at me.

“What’s wrong with Michael? It’s not me is it?” I couldn’t quite read her expression but she was actually concerned whether Michael liked her or not.

“No, no… I’m sure it’s nothing. I just really wanted to have some time to talk to you. You know. To see what you thought about everyone and to find out what happened last night.” She paled visibly and I wondered what I had said to make her so uncomfortable.

“It was just one of those things. I had to…” She paused and closed her eyes. She sat her fork down and took a drink of her orange juice. “Well, it’s complicated.” She finally looked back up to me and when her eyes met mine it looked like she was gauging what my reaction would be if she told me something.

“You can tell me anything. Believe me, there’s nothing that you could tell me that would make me any less your friend.” I reached over and grabbed her hand; “I wouldn’t have introduced you to all of them last night if I didn’t want you to become a part of our group. We’ve all been friends since like…forever but it always seemed like we were missing one person and I think that person is you. I haven’t seen Max smile like that in a really long time and the only thing I can think of for him smiling that big is because of you. I don’t know…”

Liz pulled her hand out of mine even as she leaned closer and quietly said, “That’s just it, Maria… I don’t know what happened last night. I wasn’t there.”

“What? I don’t understand.” Okay, call me lost. Hand me a road map to this conversation because I’ve taken a wrong turn somewhere.

“Some times I’m here… and some times I’m not. I have what most people call a split personality or at least the equivalent of one.”

I grabbed my drink and took a huge gulp. I couldn’t believe that I didn’t know. “You didn’t think about telling me first before I introduced you to my friends. You should have told me.” I ran my hand through my hair as I think for a moment, “Michael doesn’t trust you and if I would have known I could have eased some of his suspicions, I could have explained things to him.” I took another drink and finished off the last of it. I raised my glass and wasn’t surprised to see that the waitress was already on her way to the table. “Michael’s probably reaming Max out royally right about now.” I sunk my head into my hands. “Why me?”

“I’m sorry, Maria. You have to understand that not everyone looks at me the same way once they find out about my condition. When I first met you I had no idea that you would understand.” Liz tried to explain. “I thought I was the only one like me. When you look at it the way I do you’ll understand my reasoning behind wanting to keep it a secret.”

“So when you told me you were looking for your other half, were you referring to your split or were you referring to a soul mate kind of person.”

“When I told you about searching for that someone I meant I was looking for Max.” She must have seen the shocked expression on my face because she quickly continued, “I just didn’t know that that was his name. I knew him as…”

The guys have impeccable timing. Just when I was so close to getting the information that I so needed Max and Michael decided to come back. “Are you done?” Michael asked.

“Why what’s wrong?” It wasn’t like Michael to just leave, there had to be something wrong.

“Remember our conversation this morning?” Okay Michael you have to give me more information. We talked about a lot of things this morning. I shook my head anyways. “Well, now is one of those times. I need to go.” He held out his hand to me and I took it. No questions asked. Whatever Max told Michael, had freaked him out and I wanted to know what it was and the only way I was going to find out what it was was to go with him.

“This conversation isn’t over. I’ll talk to you later, okay, chica?” I leaned down and hugged her.

“Sure,” she said.

“Maxwell.” Michael turned and I followed him.

I didn’t want to say a thing until he did. It would only make matters worse. We were almost home and the silence still wasn’t broken. I couldn’t take the silence any more. “She’s one of you, isn’t she?”

He turned and looked at me. “Did she tell you that?”

“No, not in so many words. I should have known. That morning at the coffee shop, I should have put two and two together.”

“What did she say that day?” He made a sharp turn and I was pushed against the car door from the force of it.

“I don’t know…”

“Think!” He yelled at me. I was becoming more and more scared.

“Is she your enemy?”

“Damn it! What did she say, Maria?”

I was almost in tears. How could I have been so wrong about her? “She asked me if I believed in reincarnation. She said that she remembers her other life. She was a queen and was heavily guarded to keep her safe.”

“Who was she?”

“I don’t know. She was just about to tell me when the two of you came back from the restroom. What did Max tell you?”

“She’s like us but not the same as us.” That sounded like Max. Very cryptic probably because he wasn’t sure whether or not she could be trusted.

“What are we going to do now? Is she good or is she evil? Are we going to tell Alex and Isabel as well as Kyle and Tess?

“We don’t do anything. We don’t do anything until Max tells us what to do. As far as telling Alex, Isabel, Kyle and Tess we don’t tell them a thing. As far as they know we never saw them this weekend.”

“How am I supposed to do that? I can’t lie to them. Alex and Kyle will know that I know something.”

“You will tell them nothing.” He said through clinched teeth.

We pulled into our parking space and we both got out. I guess when Michael thought I was wanting normal I was actually getting deeper into the alien abyss. “Did Max say whether or not we’re still on for our usual Sunday morning ritual?”

“What do you think?” Well, I don’t really know. I sat down heavily onto our worn out couch. I looked at the clock that sat on top of our TV it was only ten o’clock in the morning.

“I don’t feel so well.” I got up and went to our bedroom. I crawled into bed and pulled the covers up over my head. I wished that I wasn’t so much of a busy body. I would have ten times less the hassle if I would learn to keep my nose out of other people’s business.

When will I learn?

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[Bordersinsanity]

PART 12 ~ OTHER HALF

I felt the weight of an arm on me before I even opened my eyes. I felt the tingling sensation that was traveling throughout my body and reveled in it. My body… no… my soul was singing and I had to smile. I had done it; I had found my other half. Finally, after all this time of searching I found him.

How did I find him? I didn’t. She did. The other side of me had found him. It’s a little ironic to be searching for him all this time and to have her just happen upon him.

When I open my eyes I take in his beauty. The way his hair feathers over his brow. The firm set of his chin and the wonderful healthy glow of his skin. I ached to see his eyes. Would they be the same or would they too be different.

I see his eyes start to move behind his closed lids. He’s waking and I can’t help but wonder what his reaction will be to me. Will he know that it’s me or will he think I’m still her? I guess it doesn’t really matter which one he thinks we are, eventually we will balance out to be one. I hope. I’m restless with anticipation and I have to adjust my position beside him.

He opens his eyes and I have to smile. They’re his eyes. The ones I remember from so long ago, his dark amber eyes that let me see into his soul… our soul for we are forever bound to each other. “Good morning.” He says and the velvety tone of his voice makes the warmth that is growing in the pit of my stomach spread all over.

I can’t believe it’s him and before I know it I ask, “Are you real?” My voice is barely audible because I’m scared that he will disappear if I disrupt this universe.

He nods his head and says, “I think I’m real.” I look deep into his eyes. I’m looking for answers and I realize that he doesn’t know who I am. He thinks I’m her. He lets me look for which I am grateful. I never thought I would find him. “Are you real?” He asks.

“I think I’m real.” I say. I could be having a really good dream. Maybe the others chose to take pity on me and make this world for me. I can’t take it any longer I have to touch him so I cup his face within my hands. His eyes have me mesmerized. They always did. His eyes hold everything that is him. I see our past, our present and our future when I look in his eyes.

I kiss him and he closes his eyes. He draws my body closer and the heat from his body warms me to the core. I wrap my arms around his neck for I don’t want him to let go of me. I want to spend the rest of this life with him and I’m thankful that Mira forced me to return and keep looking every time I had wanted to give up.

He breaks the kiss and frames my face with his strong hands. He looks me in the eyes and I wonder what he’s doing. Does he recognize me? Did he receive a memory from me? “Liz…” I don’t want to hear what he has to say. I don’t want him to say anything so I continue to kiss him. Hoping that he won’t say that we need to wait. That he needs time to get to know me better.

I don’t understand what else there is to know. Our souls are one. We know each other inside. It doesn’t matter that the outside has changed. “Liz. I think we better stop.” I stop in mid-kiss. I can’t believe I just heard him say that.

“I don’t want to stop.” I say and then continue my way up to his ear. “I’ve waited for this moment when I would find you for a long,” kiss, “long,” nibble, “long time.” His hands pull me away from my path and he forces me to look him in the eyes. What was he thinking? Did I say something wrong? Does he not know who he is? There was so many questions that needed answering and I didn’t know where or how to begin them.

What was I going to do? How was I going to approach the subject of being reincarnated and being sent to another galaxy? To be face to face with the love of my life and to have him look at me as if I were a total stranger breaks my heart.

“Let’s get to know each other first and then we’ll see what happens.” He says, as he looks me straight in the eyes. He should be able to see me in my eyes. I know they are the same. At least they are the same as I remember them to be. They’ve always been two dark brown pools that don’t sparkle unless he’s in my life. He’s my everything and he doesn’t have a clue to who I am.

He pushes his way up to a sitting position and I instantly feel his warmth leave my body. “I’ve got to shower and change and then we’ll head over to your place so you can shower and change. Then we are going to spend a day getting to know each other.” Always the planner. Zan was always one to plan. It was his life. He was raised to lead, to anticipate and to win. It was how we met. He needed military training. My father agreed to accept him for training and as part of his duties he was a guard in the palace.

He must have seen something in the way I looked at him. Either that or our connection was already forming. “No holding back, I want to know everything about you and I do mean everything about you.” He kissed me on the forehead and I feel his hand gently sift through my hair. I had to smile for Zan always did like the feel of my hair on his body. He never wanted me to cut it and I’m a little sad that it’s so short now.

I nod my head and say, “Okay, as long as we are together.” I lean back on the couch and watch him leave me. The minute he rounded the corner I felt like I’m all alone, once again, and I pulled my arms around my body for comforting.

Before I pull my eyes off the corner I see him peek around the corner and I have to laugh. He was just so… cute. “I was just checking to see that you were really there.” Even if he didn’t know who I was he knew there was something magical between us. I realized now that he was just as scared as I was of losing each other again.

I have to smile and I wave him on. There’s nothing that he has to worry about. “I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”

“Promise?” He asks. This is new for him and me. To be so unsure was something different. Must be the human side of us.

“I promise.” I say and I wave him on again. There was so much I needed to think about. There was so much that I needed to know about him… about us.

I sat there while I heard him rustling through his closet. I looked around his apartment and was surprised that it was so well kept. Pictures on the bookcases. I stood up and walked over to look at them. I was surprised when I saw the first one. It was of Maria and him at some flea market stand. They were holding up something and smiling. They looked happy. Maria knew him. I must have met him through Maria.

I had to sit down and think about this. Was Zan friends with Maria? Was he the one that she wanted to hook me up with? I sat down and thought for awhile and before I knew it I felt him getting closer to me.

I looked up the minute he entered the room and he took my breath away. “Wow! You look great.” I get up and meet him halfway. The pull from the connection is almost undeniable. I can’t help but want to be as close to him as I can get so I wrap my arm around his waist and he places his around my shoulder. No matter where or when we are we always fit perfectly together. “Are we off for the day?”

“I’m ready if you are.” He says as I feel him lean over and kiss the top of my head. He must feel it too because he pulls me closer to him.

“I’m ready.” I pull away and grab his hand because there is nothing more that I want then to take him to bed. To have the night that we never had. I want to get cleaned up and spend the rest of the day getting to know him. “I feel like I’ve been rolling around in dirt all night.” I don’t know what exactly happened last night but I had found a few pieces of grass on my shirt.

He lets go of my hand so he can shut the door. He stops as he hears the phone in his apartment ring. He started to open the door again but then pulls it closed. I don’t wait for him and continue down the stairs.

“Hey, wait for me.” He yells down to me.

I turn around and say, “Hurry up you slow poke.” He takes the stairs two at a time and I stop and I look at him. He’s smiling and it makes my heart start to beat faster.

I start to get into the jeep but he stops me. “Wait.” He says.

“What?” I ask. Maybe this wasn’t his vehicle. I don’t know what made me think it was?

“I just wanted to help you in.” He takes my hand and helps me up into the jeep. I settle into the seat and he’s looking at me. “Do you think it’s going to be too cold for you? I could put the top on as well as the doors if you want me too?” I can see the concern in his all-telling eyes.

“No, you don’t have to. It’s going to be a great day and I don’t want to be cooped up inside. I love having the wind all around me.” The sun was shining and I finally feel like I can start to live. My life is starting to come together and it’s all because of him. I couldn’t believe him. Instead of walking over to his side of the vehicle he pulled out the seatbelt and buckled me up. He pulled on it to make sure it was buckled tightly and then he looked at me. There was so much emotion swimming in his eyes I didn’t know what to do and before I knew it he kissed me.

I ran my fingers through his hair and he deepened the kiss a little bit more. Did he know that I was craving to have his lips on mine? Did he know that my body sang when he touched me? I was in heaven and I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want the kiss to end and when he pulled away I rolled my lower lip in to remember the kiss.

“We’re not going to get anywhere if we keep on doing that.” He told me.

“Hey, it wasn’t my idea to leave the apartment.” I had to pout because I didn’t care if I ever left his arms again. I think I could live on his kisses for all eternity.

He smiled and shook his head as he ran around to the driver’s side of the jeep and he hopped in. With the top down my hair would fly all over the place so I reached into my front jeans pocket and grabbed the scrunchy that I had. I started to put my hair into a ponytail and I notice him watching me as I do it. I look over at him and smile. He quickly changes his focus and buckles his seatbelt. Being in the good mood that I am in I lean over and pull on the buckle making sure that it is buckled in correctly.

“Am I buckled in okay?” He asks when I sit back in my seat and place my hands in my lap.

“I think so.” I said, he might have thought that I was teasing him for doing to him as he done to me but I would really hate for something awful to happen to him after just finding him. I can’t push the thought out of my mind. After so long of a search to finally have him here with me is a little unbelievable.

“Where to, my lady?” I’m instantly thrown back to my past life.

~*~Flash~*~

I run out of the palace rear entrance and he’s waiting there in a transport cruiser. “Where to, my lady?” He asks.

“I don’t care. I just want to get out of here. Everyone’s looking at me as though I was the one that killed my father. Just take me away from here.” I was crying. My father was dead. Dead. The only man that could ever rule the five planets as fairly as they so deserved was dead and the people were accusing me.

He drove and the cabin of the vehicle was quiet. So quiet. I tried hard to stifle my tears but they just kept on coming. When the cruiser stopped he climbed out and opened up the rear door and waited for me to exit. I did so and when I took the first step down I nearly tripped and fell. If it weren’t for his quick reaction to the situation I would have landed flat on my face. “Thank you.” I said quietly.

He didn’t reply but he didn’t release hold of my hand either. He took me into a home I have never seen before. “Where are we?”

“Some place safe.” He told me as he pressed his hand against the pressure lock.

“It’s yours?” I asked.

“Yes, my family wanted me to have some place for me to be alone. Some place that was mine and not the king’s. Your father said it was okay.” He quickly added as if I was going to shoot him down.

“Well, of course he did. My father never wanted anyone to feel like they couldn’t be who they wanted to be.”

“I don’t think that’s why he let me have it.” He started as he walked into the kitchen and started working in there. I took a look around while he busied himself.

“Why do you think he let you have this place while all the other guards, while on duty, have to stay at the palace?”

“He knew this day would come. He said that the seer had seen his death and the people reacting just as they are. He was glad that I would have a place to take you if ever the need ever arose for you to flee your home.”

“What did my father tell you?” I walked into the kitchen just as he was pouring the tea into cups. I never understood my father’s reasoning behind me being under constant guarding. I always thought that it was because I was the only heir but hearing what Zan was telling me was something that I never heard before.

“When you were born your mother passed…” He handed me a cup and I graciously took it and then sat down at the large wooden table. He followed suit and took a sip of his drink before continuing. “The seer said that you would be the one to kill the ruler of Antar and destroy the world that we know. Our planet, our people would all suffer by your hands.”

“I would never do anything to hurt my people and I would never, ever kill my father. I know someone murdered him and believe me I will not rest until I find out who did this.”

He placed a quieting hand over mine and I looked down at the gesture. “I know,” he began. “Believe me I’ve been watching you for sometime now.” I looked up at him and he must have seen the confusion in my eyes. “My family sent me here to watch you. To make sure that you wouldn’t have the chance to do that.”

I stood up. “You’ve been deceiving me all this time. My father trusted you and you were sent here…” I began to back up. I wasn’t safe anywhere anymore. Everywhere I turned there was another person looking at me as if I was a traitor. “I didn’t kill my father…” I turned and ran out. “You’re not going to kill me too. I’m going to find the murderer and prove everyone wrong.” I spat out over my shoulder as I ran through the forest. Limbs were reaching out and clawing at me as I ran. Tears were running down my cheeks and the salt from my tears were stinging the open wounds. I kept running. I could hear him following me. I had to lose him. There was no way that I was going to let my father’s dreams end so easily. He would have to catch me first and then kill me.

His strong arms wrapped around me and we both went tumbling down the hill that led to the river. I began to kick and claw and swing with all my might. “I’m not here to kill you.” He said over and over. “I know now that you are not the person the seer saw when you were born. I’m here to protect you as per your father’s orders. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to protect you. I would die right now if I knew that would keep you safe and out of harms way.”

It took awhile for his words to reach my ears and for me to realize what he was saying. I stopped struggling and I looked into his amber eyes. His sad amber eyes. “I would die for you, my lady.”

I snap out of the vision and notice him looking at me as he waited for directions, “I’m staying at the dorms off of Taylor Street.” I told him as I looked anywhere but at him. I knew if I looked at him he would see my sadness and I didn’t want to bring his spirits down with me.

“Taylor Street?” He asked and I nodded my head. “I can’t believe it.” He chuckled a little. The deep sound of his laugh lightened my mood quickly and I had to look at him.

“Why? What’s so funny?” I asked him.

“Hang on. I’ll show you.” He started the jeep and put it into gear. He turned twice and I quickly realized what was so funny. We were instantly on Taylor Street.

I start to laugh at the realization of what I almost did. “I was so close all this time.” If Mira hadn’t turned me away that last time I would have never found him and I would have lived the rest of eternity without him.

He must have felt my melancholy over the idea of never being able to find him and he reaches over and grabs my hand and rubs my knuckles across his lips before placing a soft kiss on its back. I look up at him. “We’ve found each other now that’s all that matters.” I smile back at him thankful that he’s so quick to make things right, just as always. Does he realize what he is to me and that’s the reason he is acting the way he is or is this something else. How do I bring this up to him? “What’s wrong?” Could he read my expression that easy? I looked into his eyes and I see his concern. I don’t like him looking like that. He shouldn’t have to worry about me.

“Nothing.” I say trying to assure him.

“Come on, you can tell me.” But it didn’t work.

“It’s nothing really.” I smile at him wanting him not to worry about it. I had some things to think about. The first thing was how to tell him that I’m not exactly from around here. That he wasn’t from around here. I begin to wring my hands as I try and think of a solution. I had to remember that no matter what I remembered he didn’t and I had to take things slow with him. I realized that we couldn’t just pick up where we left off. Things were different; he was different… I was definitely different.

“Liz…” He asks me to tell him without asking. I can’t look at him. I don’t know how I got into this mood. Maybe it was inevitable. I was destined to be unhappy. Khivar made sure of that. I’m sure he had a hand in making sure that Zan didn’t retain any of his memories. Why my uncle hates me so much is beyond me.

I remember that Zan had asked me to confide in him, to let him in. “Really, it’s nothing.”

He quickly pulled off into the parking lot of the dorms and shut the jeep down. “Liz, I may have just met you last night for the first time in my life but I know that there is something bothering you. Please, tell me. Nothing that you say will change the way I feel about you.”

I look up at him and I see that his eyes are filled with worry. “It’s really silly. I’m just over reacting. Really.” I can’t tell him. It would shatter his entire world, as he knows it. He unbuckles my seatbelt and pulls me so I am now facing him. He cups my face and he pulls me in for a kiss.

I feel him trying to show me what I mean to him and it makes me regret not being able to tell him the truth even more. It was so unfair to him and to me so I began to cry for everything that we had lost. Everything that he had been through.

I knew the minute that I started to cry that he would want to look at me. Look deep within my eyes and see my soul. Our soul that lay within me. He tried to pull away and my gut took over. I wrapped my arms around him and deepened the kiss. I knew it wouldn’t last. I knew that there was no way that I would be able to keep what I was feeling from him so I deepened the kiss in hopes of our connection bursting to life.

~*~FLASH~*~

I see him standing over my grave and weeping for our lost love. I feel his agony, his pain.

The image switches and I see him arguing with Khivar. “I will not marry another.” He yells. “No one will ever take her place in my heart.” He’s just about to leave the room when Khivar speaks up.

“Then you have no choice but to step down off the thrown. You don’t belong there.”

Zan turned around and took three huge steps and was eye to eye with Khivar. “I will stay on the throne and rule as her father did. That’s what she wanted. She didn’t want to destroy what he worked so hard for. The seer was wrong!” He turned and stormed out.

‘Oh God, he does retain some of his memories. They must be his because they are after my death.’ I can’t take anymore. He was forced to take another wife so that he could stay on the throne. I tried to pull away but Zan held me tight. He must be getting memories from me as well. I open my mouth to try and say something but all I managed to do was allow the kiss to deepen. My eyes fly open and I realize that his are open as well. The minute our eyes lock we are thrown back into our connection.

~*~FLASH~*~

He was standing in a cave. The Zan that lives here on earth is in a cave with four others. I notice Maria but that is all I know. They have the communicators and are watching as Shara speaks. “If you are seeing me now, it means that you are alive and well. I take this form because it will be familiar to you, and it will help you to understand what I am about to say. You have lived before. You perished in the conflict that enslaves our planet but your essence was duplicated, cloned, and mixed with human genetic materials so that you might be recreated into human beings.” Shara had a way with words; I had to admit. She didn’t even bring up what the conflict was; that I was the conflict.

She turns and focuses on Zan. “My son, you were the beloved leader of our people. I have sent with you your young bride.” Zan turned and looked at the short blonde. Who was she? I had no idea. Was she the one that he was forced to marry? Was she his young bride that Shara was talking about? I was his wife and yet I wasn’t with them. Why didn’t they send me back with them and who were the others that stood beside him?

She then focuses on the tall blonde that was standing beside him. “My daughter, the man you were betrothed to, and your brother's second-in-command.” I realize that the blonde standing next to Zan was his sister, Vilondra and evidently her betrothed. I still didn’t recognize him. I continued to watch as the images flashed before my eyes.

“Oh my god, Max. Our mother.” Vilondra whispered. She called him Max. His earth name was Max. Did I know that?
I was broken out of my thoughts the minute Shara began to talk again. “Our enemies have come to Earth. You will know them only by the evil within. You must learn enough to use your skills, your knowledge, and your leadership to combat the enemy so that you can come back and free us. I live for that moment that I may once again hold you both in my arms. Help us. I love you.” The image faded into nothingness and the five of them stood there in silence.

Vilondra was the first one to speak. “She's so beautiful.” She turned her body so that she could look at her brother. They had never seen their real mother before and I could understand how they felt. When I lived on Antar I had never known my mother. It wasn’t until I died that I could be reunited with her in the collective.

“I always knew there was something out there, but I had no idea how important it was.” The man that was Vilondra’s betrothed said quietly.

“Things will never be the same, but whatever happens, we have to stay together. It's the four of us now.” Zan said taking the responsibility that he had been born to.

“I knew this was meant to be.” The short blonde said as she snaked her arm around him and tried to gather him into her embrace. “What happens now?” Seeing her eyes through his I realize who she is. He was sent to Earth with my cousin, Ava. Daughter of Khivar. My enemy. Our enemy…

The flash ended and I needed to get out of there. I didn’t want to see him with her. The love of my life had taken another. And not just any other, Ava, my enemy. His mother had told him that they were to be together and even he said that it was just the four of them now. I pull away from him and I jump out of the jeep. I have to get out of here. I shouldn’t be kissing him. He no longer is mine. Mira tricked me into staying. She had to have known that he was sent with another. There’s no room for me.

“Liz!” I hear him yell after me. I keep on running. I have to get away from him. “Liz… wait!”

I run through the hall of the dorm and when I reach my room I quickly open the door and slam it shut. The room is dark. I had put a blanket over the window to keep the light out when I first moved in here. I’m surprised that it was still up. She usually takes it down when she’s in control since she likes the room bright and airy. I crawl to the farthest corner away from the door and I sit and wait. He won’t be too far behind and it will only be a few seconds before I’m forced to tell him everything. He has to know, he had to have seen memories from me.

I hear the knock on the door and I hear him quietly say, “Liz, please… let me in.” I don’t know what to say… a part of me wants to run to him and let him take everything that is alien away from my memory. I don’t want to be some alien queen and I don’t want to have the history that I have. “Liz… please.” I knew he wouldn’t leave so easy.

“Go away!” I yell. My alien side wins out. The hurt and betrayed side is the one that yells now.

“I’m not going away until I can talk to you. I can explain. Please, let me explain.”

“No one can help me. I’m here all alone. I have no one.” They knew what they were doing when they sent me here to Earth. They knew that I would find him and that I would find out that he never really loved me. He was only doing the job that his family had set out for him to do. To protect the king and make sure that I don’t murder him.

“You’re being silly, Liz. I can help you if you will just let me in.” I hear the doorknob wiggle. Did I lock it? I couldn’t remember. It didn’t really matter if I did. “I’m coming in.” He says as he opens the door and the light from the hallway fills half of my room.

“Liz…” It’s hard for me to be quiet. My tears are still running down my face and my nose is beginning to run. “I’m sorry that you feel this way. Please, let me help you. I just found you, don’t let me lose you. Again.” What did he see in my memories? Does he finally realize who I am or is he just guessing? If he knew who I was why was he still calling me Liz? “Together we can fit the pieces together and come up with a solution… only… we’ll have to work together.”

It sounded so easy when he put it that way. But I had to be strong. I was alone and would always be. I was damned from the beginning. “Go away, Zan, and quit calling me Liz. I’m not Liz.”

“Okay, I won’t call you Liz anymore. Let me just turn on the light.” I could tell by the sound of his voice that he didn’t want to believe what he saw. I could see him reaching for the light switch and I knew what I had to do. I had to show him what he was refusing to see. To believe. I held my hand up and made a small globe of light illuminate within my palm. “Liz…” His jaw dropped and his voice trailed off. I knew he didn’t want to believe what he saw. “You’re one of us? You’re like us?”

“I am one of you but I’m not like you. If I were like you I wouldn’t be having a hard time with this.” I was referring to his lack of memories. He had yet to tap into them. It’s true when they say ignorance is bliss. He was ignorant of everything that had happened to him and our people before he came here, and I wasn’t as lucky. Everyday I had to deal with my memories of having a love and then losing that love. I had to live everyday knowing that if I were to return to my home world that they might kill me again for my father’s death. Or I could stay here on Earth and know that it might be just another day that I would not be able to find my true love. There was no right answer and there still isn’t.

“What are you talking about? I don’t understand how you can be one of us but not like us.” He’s walking closer to me and I find myself welcoming his closeness.

“I’m not sure really. All I know is that when I’m here I’m looking for you. I have this unnatural craving to find you to connect with you. To be one with you.” I don’t know how I came here. I don’t know why I have my memories… and I don’t know why I was born human.

“And when you’re not here?” The only way I could answer him was to show him of what it was like when she was in control. I was in limbo, neither here nor there.

“I wanted to give up. I had looked for you for so long and I wasn’t any closer to finding you than before. They had shut the door on me. I could no longer return for if I did I would have to stay. It was fine with me. I mean, if I was meant to be with you then I would have found you much sooner right?” I just started rambling off what I had been thinking just before this morning. “I figured they were lying to me to keep me from returning. I figured it was Khivar’s way of making me suffer.” He sat down as if I had just taken his breath away from him.

I watched him steady himself up against the closet door. His face was white and I wondered what he had seen. “What?” He asked

“You look so different but yet your eyes are the same. When we woke this morning I was lost in your eyes. I can’t pretend anymore. You’re not the same as I remember you. I remember a you that you don’t and it’s wrong for me to think that things could be the way that they used to be.” He had another life and there was no place for me in it. I couldn’t stand to be this close to him and not see the love in his eyes that he used to share with me before.

He reached for my hand, “I know I don’t know who you used to be but the minute I met you I knew that I knew you. Please, don’t run away from me. Please, let’s figure this out together.” He was sincerely trying and his eyes broke my heart. He did love me. He just didn’t know me.

“I can’t run. I have nowhere to go.” I waved my hand around to show him that everything that was in this room was all I have. “I don’t fit in anywhere. Not here and certainly not there.” I couldn’t look into his eyes anymore so I drop my head into my hands.

“You’re wrong. You belong here, I know you do.” His voice was barely above a whisper. “You belong here with me.” He was begging me to believe in him. To trust him. It’s just the four of us now. I saw the short blonde with him again and my head shot up from my hands and I began denying everything that he was telling me.

I saw the confusion in his eyes so I told him. “No I don’t. I saw you with her. You married her after I had gone. You were forced to take another back then but you didn’t know about that here and yet you still live with her.”

“Who, Tess?” Tess? Was that her name? My skin crawled when I imagined him whispering her name. The room was too small and he was too close. I was just about to leave when he began again. “I was married to you before?” He didn’t know that we were married before. What did he see in our connection? His question wasn’t one of disappointment but of relief. Was he relieved that we had been married?

“You were married to Ava, my cousin, daughter of Khivar.” His eyes widened and his mouth opened and hung there.

Finally his mind was able to process again and he began speaking. “But you said after…” I heard his stomach growl and mine answered it.

He looks at me and then stands up. He holds his hand out to me to take and I do it without even thinking about it. It was natural for me. Second nature, but that wasn’t what was right. He was no longer mine and I quickly pulled my hand away and took a step back to maintain a comfortable distance between us. “Go shower and change and I’ll take you to get something to eat. We can talk more about what you remember and what I remember and then once we have everything straightened out we’ll go tell the others.” It all seemed so logical coming out of his mouth. He had a way of making everything all right with just the touch of his hand and the sound of his voice.

He took a step forward to close the distance between us and he cupped his hand against my cheek. I couldn’t fight it any longer and I leaned into the familiar gesture and closed my eyes as I remembered that the best times in my life were when he had touched me like this.

“Don’t push me away just yet. Please. Not until we find the answers to everything that we are looking for.” He pulled me into him and I couldn’t resist wrapping my arms around him as he did the same. God, this just felt so right. This is what was right. I knew it and hopefully he would too.

~*~Flash~*~

He pulled me up from the ground and took me into his arms. “I would die for you. I may have been sent here to watch you but while I was watching you I fell in love with you. You are the most amazing woman that has ever lived. You’ve won my heart without even trying to. Your people will know that you didn’t kill your father and together we will prove that.”

He pulled me away so he could look me in the eyes. “You shouldn’t have to hide in your own land for your safety. I will protect you.” I look into his eyes and see his devotion to me. How could I have even thought that he was here to kill me? I was so blind. He cupped my cheek and I closed my eyes as I listened to the plan that he had come up with. “We’ll go back and tell your uncle that we will be married by months end. You can sit on the throne where you belong and the dream of bringing peace to your people will come true.”

“Only if you’re there with me.” I said. “Only with you.”

I was still wrapped in his embrace when the memory ended. He finally loosened his hold on me and said, “Go… before something else changes your mind.”

I smiled at him for I had an idea what he was thinking. I hurried to the closet and grabbed a change of clothes. I then went to the dresser and grabbed my bag of makeup and just before I walked out the door I turned around and asked, “You will be here when I return, right?”

“Yes, I’ll be here.” I remembered what came next and I was just about to ask if he promised but he beat me to it. “I’m not going anywhere, you’re stuck with me, I promise.” I closed the door and left him in the darkness of my room. The halls were empty. Most students didn’t stay around on the weekends and I was grateful for that because I didn’t want to have to share the bathroom with anyone right now.

I walk into the pink tiled room and released the breath that I was holding. I’ve been on one hell of a roller coaster ride this morning and I can’t wait until we can just sit down and talk. Get to know one another again. I quickly get undress and turn on the water. Sticking my hand in to test the water I realize that it’s just not hot enough. I crank the water further to the right and wait for it to get to the right temperature.

I wonder what he’s doing in my room? Probably nothing. He’s probably still reeling from the fact that we had been married in our previous life. I'm sure he’s going to ask me a lot of questions. I’m not sure how I’m going to be able to answer them all. I don’t know if I want to answer them.

I wet my hair and begin to lather the soap in it. I wasn’t too worried about what he would find even if he did want to snoop. There wasn’t much there. Over the years the two of us seemed to have come to an agreement on what was important to carry around. There was only one item that was important to both of us. Grandma Claudia’s journal. The one she gave us when we turned sixteen.

Maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea for him to find it. I mean it had everything that happened to both of us in there. He would get to know both of us just by reading it. My entries would be harder for him to read because when I wrote my thoughts down I tended to write in Antarian, a habit that was hard to break.

My shower was done. I was clean and had a new outlook on my life. Everything was going to be all right. There was no way that it could get any worse. I quickly changed into a cable-knit sweater and a pair of jeans and of course the doc martens that she had put on last night. I picked up my stuff and headed for my room. I opened my door to my room and there he sat, on my bed. He was staring off into nothingness and I decided to not make that big of deal of it. “You ready to go get something to eat?” I asked him from the foot of the bed.

He stood up and took hold of my outstretched hand. “Yeah, I’m ready.” I opened the door and passed through. “Do you have everything that you need?” I nodded my head and he closed the door and we walked back out to the parking lot hand in hand.

“So what do you like to eat?” He asked as he climbed into the driver’s side of the jeep.

“Um,” I can’t believe I’m so nervous about telling him what I liked to eat. Surely he had the same eating habits as I did? Maybe. I realized that I was being stupid and started laughing.

“What so funny?” He asked and smiled when he looked at me. His eyes were crystal clear and they looked like he was really happy. They reminded me of the way they were just before we got married.

I fought hard not to travel back to that time. That was a different life. This was now. He was different and I was different. But it wasn’t really. We both knew that there would be a time that we would have to go back. Mira told me so. We had to come back together in order to free them but then it dawned on me. Shara didn’t say anything about him finding me and about returning with me. I needed to go back and ask Mira, which was right? What did I have to do?

I shook my head and got back to the now… Now he wanted to know what I was laughing about. “No, you’re going to think this is weird. I absolutely love pancakes with peanut butter and hot sauce.” I didn’t want to see his face. Any normal person would gag at the combination but when he started to laugh I couldn’t help it. I just had to look at him.

“You have to be kidding me? I love that too.” It’s amazing how easy this is. I don’t have to worry about what I say or do. He understands; he truly knows what it’s like to be me.

“Really?” I ask just to make sure that I’m not imagining things.

“Yeah, really.” I could see his hands relax a little on the steering wheel. Today was going to be the best day of my life.

“Okay, then take me someplace we can get pancakes with peanut butter.”

“Well, then. Who am I to argue with a beautiful lady?” It was going to be hard to get used to him always complimenting me. It was way different than our last boyfriend. If that’s what you wanted to call him. “Off to the best IHOP I know,” I started laughing when I heard his stomach rumble, “and it’s close by too.” He joined in with me.

Less than ten minutes is what it took to get us to the pancake house. He parked the jeep and walked around to my side and helped me out. I kept hold of his hand and we walked inside. We didn’t have to wait long until a high-pitched squeal rang throughout the restaurant. Zan pulled me closer and then I felt his hot breath on my ear as he whispered, “If you want to go somewhere else I’ll understand.”

I didn’t know what he was talking about. I looked up at him and then watched where he pointed. There was Maria standing on her chair waving her arms all over the place. I waved back at her and smiled. “You know Maria?” I asked as I looked back up at him.

“Yeah… Maria and I are… well; she’s dating Michael. He was Rath when we lived on Antar.” So he did know their names that they had on Antar.

“Really…” I began as I took another look at the man sitting with Maria. He must be used to all of her antics. Maybe Maria is really Vilondra… They were betrothed in their previous life maybe they actually did love each other?

“I’d love to sit with them. It’s been so long…” I was going to say since we’ve talked but then I realized that we couldn’t really sit and talk since they didn’t know who I was. “They don’t know about me do they?”

He shook his head no and said, “And they don’t have to know if you don’t want them too.”

He was so good in understanding me. He always had been.

“I’d like that. It’s kind of overwhelming to finally find you, let alone my cousin too. Who else is… Is Maria, Vilondra?” I had to ask. It didn’t really feel right but I had to ask.

“No… No… Maria is human. Vilondra is my sister, Isabel? She’s kind of tall and has long blonde hair…” I shook my head saying that I hadn’t yet met her. I knew what she looked like but I didn’t know her. It was the same way on Antar. Vilondra was always so distant when Zan and I were together. “That’s okay. You’ll meet her soon.” I smiled. I hoped she had changed. That’s all we needed was someone causing a rift between us.

“I have so many questions.” I said as he led us over to Maria and Michael’s table.

“Let’s eat and then we’ll go somewhere to chat. I know the best place.” He sounded sure of himself and I found myself believing him.

“Okay.” Maria met us halfway in between and she practically bowled me over.

“Oh, goody, goody, goody.” She hugged me and quickly moved on to Max.

She whispered something in his ear that made him turned a really bright shade of red. Even the tips of his ears were red. She squealed again and then said, “I knew the two of you were going to hit it off famously. I just knew it.”

She bounced around to her side of the four-top table and sat down and Zan leaned over and whispered “If you only knew the half of it.”

We sat down and Rath barely acknowledged us. He was my cousin from my mother’s side of the family and we didn’t really get a chance to spend a lot of time together because of everything that was going on. I wasn’t surprised that Shara said that he was Zan’s second-in-command because he was born and raised to be a soldier. It was in his genes to defend and conquer. He had to have been really good if he had risen through the ranks to become a general as well as the king’s second-in-command at such a young age.

I couldn’t keep my eyes off him and I wished that he would say or do something instead of just sit there and eat. It wasn’t long before I heard, “Damn it, Maria. Those clogs are going in the trash if you kick me again.”

“You’re being rude, Michael.” Maria smiled sweetly at me as if I was not supposed to even pay any attention to the two of them bickering. Out of all the times we went out and she talked about him I never realized that he reminded me so much of the Rath I once vaguely knew.

“Hi, guys.” He finally said.

“Hey.” Zan said quietly. I had to look at him to make sure that everything was okay. I reached under the table and grabbed his hand. He smiled at me and I relaxed some. Not a whole lot, because he didn’t relax a whole lot.

Our waitress came rather quickly. I was surprised that a place this crowded had that fast of service. Maybe it had something to do with Maria’s display of enthusiasm earlier?

“She’ll have the short stack with a side of…” Zan looked at me. He was ordering for me. The little pitter-patter in my stomach was increasing. I had dreamed of this for so long. “Scrambled?” He asked and I nodded in agreement. “Yes, add a side of scrambled eggs and I would like the same and could you bring me some Tabasco sauce too, please.” He folded up the menu and then took mine. He made sure to caress the side of my hand and I couldn’t help but smile even wider at him.

“So, you’re ordering her food for her now?” We immediately quit staring at one another when Maria interrupted us.

There was that wonderful shade of bright red again. “Maria.” I looked over to Maria and she held her hand up to stop him from even continuing. They were close and I was glad to know that it was possible to be close to others and not have to worry what they would think of you. Not having to hide anything was going to be wonderful.

“No, no. That’s quite all right. I understand completely. It’s like being newly weds. No explanation needed.” Maria smiled and then started eating her breakfast. It looked like some kind of omelet and it looked pretty good from here.

Our breakfast came and we both immediately set out to dig in. “Um, excuse me. Could you bring a couple of cups of peanut butter for me?” He asked the waitress. She nodded her head and was back in a flash with the peanut butter. I wasn’t even thinking about anything when I poured hot sauce all over my eggs. This was going to taste absolutely wonderful. I usually had to hide what I ate around my parents for they knew when I ate hot sauce I wasn’t actually myself any longer. I took a bite and closed my eyes savoring the flavor of the meal.

“Excuse me, I’ll be right back.” Michael stood up and headed in the direction of the restrooms. I don’t know what had happened. I was so hungry that I practically forgot that there was anyone else at our table.

“Max…” Maria let it trail and I looked at her and then back to Zan. “Could you…”

He got up and placed his napkin next to his plate. “Sure, I’ll go see what’s wrong.” I looked up at him with what I’m sure was concern but he leaned over and kissed me. “I’ll be right back.” It helped some. I knew whatever was happening that it would be all right. Zan would take care of Michael and all would be right. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to keep my identity from them right now… the more I thought about it the more I wonder if we really did the right thing?

“What’s wrong with Michael? It’s not me is it?” I had to ask… and I needed to make sure that I called him by his Earth name and not by his Antarian name.

“No, no… I’m sure it’s nothing. I just really wanted to have some time to talk to you. You know. To see what you thought about everyone and to find out what happened last night.” I knew it was too good to be true. There was no way that I could continue to lie to her. She had been such a good friend when we first met that fateful morning.

“It was just one of those things. I had to…” I stopped in mid sentence not really knowing how to go about telling her. I closed my eyes and searched for any kind of clue I could find for what happened last night. Not finding one I opened my eyes and sat my fork down and took a huge drink of my orange juice. “Well, it’s complicated.” I finally had the nerve to look my friend of three weeks in the eyes. How would she take it? She already knew the hard part. There were aliens among them. It wouldn’t be so bad to add one more now would it?

“You can tell me anything. Believe me, there’s nothing that you could tell me that would make me any less your friend.” She reached across the table and grabbed my hand and squeezed it. “I wouldn’t have introduced you to all of them last night if I didn’t want you to become a part of our group. We’ve all been friends since like…forever but it always seemed like we were missing one person and I think that person is you. I haven’t seen Max smile like that in a really long time and the only reason I can think for him smiling that big is because of you. I don’t know…” I squeezed her hand back. I appreciated what she was doing.

I realized what she had said. She hadn’t seen Max smile like that in a real long time. Was he not happy with Ava? He did know they didn’t belong together. I hoped.

I leaned closer and quietly said, “That’s just it, Maria… I don’t know what happened last night. I wasn’t there.” Okay, so that wasn’t the right way to go about it.

“What? I don’t understand.” I knew she would be confused. Just chalk it up to having a rough morning. I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster and with Zan’s absence I’m a little unstable right now.

I took a deep breath and tried my best to straighten everything out. “Some times I’m here… and some times I’m not. I have what most people call a split personality or at least the equivalent of one.” That was the best way that I could think of to explain it.

I must have scared her because she leaned back in her chair and took a huge drink of whatever kind of juice was in her glass. She looked at me a moment before sitting up and leaning towards me, “You didn’t think about telling me first before I introduced you to my friends. You should have told me.” She wasn’t taking it as well as I thought she would have. She ran her hand through her hair. She looked everywhere around the restaurant as if she was searching for a hidden camera or something. Her eyes finally settled back on me, “Michael doesn’t trust you and if I would have known about your…..” She couldn’t seem to find the words to describe my problem so she finally just continued, “I could have eased some of his suspicions, I could have explained things to him.” What had happened last night to make Rath not trust me. I mean, sure, when I look across the room I had no idea that he was one of us but sitting at the same table I knew. I had that feeling of familiarity when I was in his company. She took another gulp of her drink and finished it off. She raised her glass in hopes of getting the waitress’s attention and I was once again surprised at the efficiency of the staff.

“Michael’s probably reaming Max out royally right about now.” She dropped her head into her hands and began to moan, “Why me? You try to help your friends. You want them to be happy.” She shook her head before continuing with her rambling, “I thought you would be great for Max. He always seems to be looking for someone and I thought…. Oh, god, Michael’s going to have my butt for this…..”

What could I say? There really wasn’t anything that would make this go any better so I cut off her rant. “I’m sorry, Maria. You have to understand that not everyone looks at me the same way once they find out about my condition. When I first met you I had no idea that you would understand. I thought I was the only one like me. When you look at it the way I do you’ll understand my reasoning behind wanting to keep it a secret.” My entire life had been one huge secret and now that I had a chance to open up to someone I held back.

“So when you told me you were looking for your other half, were you referring to your split or were you referring to a soul mate kind of person.” She had a valid point and it was a good question to ask. If this is the way she wanted to handle it then I can deal with it.

“When I told you about searching for that someone I meant I was looking for Max.” I almost stumbled on his name for it was the first time I had ever used it. “I just didn’t know that that was his name. I knew him as…”

Michael stormed to the table and gruffly said, “Are you done?” As he motioned to Maria’s half-eaten meal.

“Why what’s wrong?” She asked as she looked from Michael then to Max and then to me.

“Remember our conversation this morning?” He knew. I can’t believe he knew. Well, I can but I can’t believe that he doesn’t want to stick around and get to know me. I looked up to Zan and he gave a small quirk of his smile to let me know that everything was okay.

“Well, now is one of those times. I need to go.” He held out his hand to her and she quickly took it.

She leaned down and hugged me and as she did she whispered into my ear, “This conversation isn’t over. I’ll talk to you later, okay, chica?”

I was grateful that she wasn’t reacting the way that Michael was. “Sure,” I assured her.

“Maxwell.” That was all Michael said. The two of them left and Zan sat down beside me.

“Did I do anything wrong?” I asked.

“No, no you didn’t.” He took my hand and squeezed it. “Nothing’s changed. We’ll eat breakfast and then we’ll go some place where we can go and talk.”

I held onto his hand until he smiled at me. I locked eyes with him and I knew everything wasn’t okay. Maria had said it. Rath didn’t trust me and I had just driven a wedge between the king and his second-in-command. Is it too late to go back and start this day over? God how I wished that I was still on Zan’s couch and in his arms.

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[Bordersinsanity]

PART 13 ~ MAX

As we sat down at the table, I knew that Michael was more than a little miffed at me for still being with her. Knew it by the way that he didn’t even acknowledge us when we sat down. I know we’re not going to make it through breakfast I know he’s bound to figure some way of getting me alone to complain. All I can do is hope to hell that he won’t make a scene but if he does I don’t think that anyone will bother to look in our direction. Especially after the scene Maria pulled.

I noticed Maria looking over at us and then I saw her body move jerkily. It was like a chain reaction and it didn’t take Michael long to say, “Damn it, Maria. Those clogs are going in the trash if you kick me again.”

“You’re being rude, Michael.” Leave it to Maria to point the obvious out to everyone. I had to smile at her and once again I found myself silently thanking her for being her. If it weren’t for her I wouldn’t have found Liz and Liz wouldn’t have found me. I’m not really sure what would have happened if she would have given up on me? I’m eternally grateful knowing that Maria cared enough about me to want to make me happy.

“Hi, guys.” Michael finally acknowledged us as he leaned over the table and rubbed what I could only imagine was his shin.

I didn’t want to be the next to be kicked from underneath the table so I answered him back. “Hey.” I was amazed that Liz reached underneath the table and took hold of my hand. I looked at her and she was smiling at me. Her smile alone was enough to know that I would… no… we would survive breakfast. I smiled back at her and then quickly looked over at Michael. He was glaring at us and even though I relaxed a little it wasn’t going to be enough for me to act like myself. Michael was going to realize that something wasn’t right. I was going to be in big trouble once he got me by himself.

The waitress was almost instantly at our table and was ready to take our order before we knew it. I didn’t even think about what I was doing before I realized that I was ordering for Liz. “She’ll have the short stack with a side of…” I looked at her because we hadn’t exactly talked about eggs. I wasn’t sure if she wanted them or not. I asked, “Scrambled?” and waited for her answer. She nodded her head in agreement. The brief distraction from Michael’s death glare has the tension slowly easing its way out between my shoulders. Well, that and the fact that Liz was at my side. I couldn’t believe how easy it was to be with her. All this time I suffered date after date, who would have guessed that when I finally found the woman that was right for me it would be this easy? “Yes, add a side of scrambled eggs and I would like the same and could you bring me some Tabasco sauce too, please.” I was having the time of my life… I looked at Liz and she smiled up at me. She handed me her menu and I took it. I couldn’t resist touching her and when our hands met for that brief moment her eyes lit up and sparkled. She was glowing again and I couldn’t help but wonder if it was because of me or because of who she was. It didn’t really matter either way was fine as long as I got to see her shine like she was.

“So, you’re ordering her food for her now?” We broke our staring match and I turned and looked to Maria quickly.

“Maria.” I could feel the heat rising… I’m sure I’m a really red color by now, how embarrassing. She immediately held her hand up to keep me from uttering another word. What was I supposed to do? Nothing, that’s what. It was a natural reaction to order breakfast for Liz. We did talk about it on the way over.

“No, no. That’s quite all right. I understand completely. It’s like being newly weds. No explanation needed.” Maria was taking it easy on me. I had to remember to thank her the next time we went out. Tomorrow was our normal get together day. Maybe I could do it then… I wonder if Liz will be there in the morning? I feel my pants get tighter and decide to try not to think about that… but it was really hard. Excuse the pun but if Liz were still at my place in the morning she would have to stay the night. The big guy liked that idea and I couldn’t help it but I had to adjust him.

Maria busied herself and Liz and I just stared at them. Michael had gone back to eating his food and the unbearable silence was killing me. The more he stayed quiet the worse it was, the more trouble I would be in. The more he thought about how much he didn’t like the idea of her intruding on the group.

The waitress came, just a short time after we had ordered. I was afraid that the eggs would be runny. It couldn’t have been long enough to get the eggs cooked all the way through, could it? It smelled good. I was hungry and I knew Liz was. I got ready to dig in and realized that I had forgotten to get the peanut butter.

“Um, excuse me. Could you bring a couple of cups of peanut butter for me?” The waitress left and was back in less than a minute. She was really efficient. I was spreading the peanut butter over my pancake when Michael shoved away from the table.

“Excuse me, I’ll be right back.” I felt like screaming. I was so hungry and now wasn’t the time to be doing this. Why couldn’t he had done this before our food was here or better yet why couldn’t he just wait until like… never to do this. I look up at Michael and he gives me the evil eye. I look to Maria and she’s looking to Michael. Maybe I was over reacting? Maybe it didn’t have anything to do with Liz and me.

“Max…” Maria asks. Nope. It had everything to do with me. “Could you?” Crap. I slowly drag myself out of my chair and took one more look in the direction Michael had gone.

“Sure, I’ll go see what’s wrong.” I look over to Liz and her brows wrinkle a little bit in worry. I don’t want her to worry about it. I’ll take care of everything. She doesn’t have to worry about a thing. I lean over and kiss her. The kiss was more for me than for her but I hope that it relieved her of her worry because it gave me the strength to go tackle Michael’s attitude. “I’ll be right back.” I whisper to her. She tried to smile but the longer I was with her the more I knew that she was putting up a front for everyone in the restaurant, including me.

I left the two girls at the table. Liz was comfortable with Maria enough that I didn’t worry too much about her. She could handle her own. After all Maria was the only friend she had had for the past three weeks. I rounded the corner and saw him pacing the width of the hallway. “What the hell are you doing, Maxwell?”

“I’m here to eat breakfast.” I told him. I knew that wasn’t what he wanted to hear from me but until he flat out asked me I wasn’t volunteering any information. I had to hear it from him and talking in circles wasn’t going to accomplish anything.

“You know that’s not what I mean. What is she doing here?” He nodded his head toward the dining area and then took two steps to me so his face was directly in mine.

“She’s eating breakfast.” Michael and I did this every once in awhile. It was time for our annual pissing contest.

He shoved me against the wall and grabbed a hold of my shirt. “What did she do? Spend the night?”

“That’s none of your business.” I said as I shoved him away from me. “That’s none of your god damn business.” I said through clinched jaws.

“What? Did you forget about Tess so quickly?” I didn’t understand why he was being so hurtful to me.

“What’s this all about? You know that this has nothing to do with Tess.” I began pacing the width of the hall like he had been doing just moments earlier. “What’s got you so upset, Michael? Really? It isn’t the fact that I’m here eating breakfast with Liz and it’s not because of Tess. It was just last night that you told me I needed to quit encouraging her. So, tell me. What’s wrong?”

He began to speak but before he did he ran his hands through his hair. “There’s something about her.” He started out saying. I had to fight not to grin. If only he knew what she was about her. “I can’t really put my finger on it.” I took a slow step forward and placed a calming hand on his forearm. “She practically drowned her eggs with hot sauce. That’s not normal.” Now I see what has his panties in a bunch.

“I know. Believe me and when I find out what it is what it all is. I will tell you about it. But for now don’t ruin this for me. Can’t you be happy that I found someone? Someone who is actually for me, like Maria is for you. Don’t do this. Please.” He calmed down but I could still see his rage in his eyes. He wasn’t going to let it go that easily.

“Tomorrow, Maxwell. You have until tomorrow to tell me what it is. I’ll be watching you.” He stomped off and I followed not too far behind him.

“Are you done?” He spat out to Maria. I felt sorry for her. She didn’t deserve this kind of treatment. She looked up to him and her brow creased.

“Why what’s wrong?” She looked to me and then to Liz. They had been in an intense conversation when Michael so rudely interrupted them. Maria probably poked and prodded until she got it out of Liz. She had a way of doing that to a person. I wouldn’t blame Liz for telling her. It’s not like Maria wasn’t going to find out in the end.

“Remember our conversation this morning?” Michael said cryptically. I checked Liz to see if she was okay and she was looking at me. Her face was full of worry and I knew what was going through her mind and I couldn’t help smiling at her. She was so beautiful inside and out. She was worried what Michael was going to do and I couldn’t say anything until he left. We had the rest of the day ahead of us and I was going to put it to some good use.

“Well, now is one of those times. I need to go.” I didn’t even see Maria answer him. She had gotten up and she went over to Liz and encircled her in a tight embrace.

She whispered something in her ear that I couldn’t quit get but I heard Liz say, “Sure.”

Michael walked passed me and said, “Maxwell,” and he was gone. Maria hurried to catch up with him.

I sat down at my breakfast and looked to Liz and smiled. “Did I do anything wrong?” She asked. I took her hand and squeezed it.

“No, no you didn’t. Nothing’s changed. We’ll eat breakfast and then we’ll go some place where we can talk.” She held tightly to my hand until I smiled at her. I willed her to believe that everything was going to be okay. No matter what Michael thought I wasn’t about to let her go.

I let go of her hand and we got back to eating. Needless to say my food was almost room temperature. Eggs didn’t taste very good at room temperature. I ate around them and finished about ten minutes later. Even though the food wasn’t very hot it was probably the best breakfast that I had had in ages.

She finished just shortly after I did and the waitress came around and asked if there was anything else that she could get us. “No thank you.” I said and she quietly placed the bill for the entire table in front of me. I guess in Michael and Maria’s haste they forgot to pay for their breakfast. The waitress was eyeing me from across the room and I smiled at her so she wouldn’t worry. I would pay for their breakfast along with ours. I laid the appropriate change on the table and I stood up. Liz followed suit and I took her hand.

“Are you ready?” I asked. She smiled up at me and we walked out of the restaurant hand in hand.

“So… where are you going to take me now?” She hopped into the Jeep and waited for me to climb into the other side before she buckled her seatbelt up.

“It’s a surprise,” I said. “Do you trust me?”

Her face dropped the light air and got serious. “Of course I trust you. Don’t you know that I would go anywhere with you? Do anything that I could for you? You’re the reason I’m here and nothing will ever make me think otherwise.” I had a lump in my throat and was having a hard time swallowing.

“Liz… You don’t know me. How can you be so sure?” I hadn’t started the Jeep yet and I just stared at her.

“I know you as well as I know myself. Do you not trust me?” She asked. “Would you not go anywhere I go just to be with me? Would you not do anything in your power for me?” She didn’t wait for me to answer her. “Our souls are one and in time you will realize that.” She looked at me again and smiled. When I fumbled with the keys she laughed.

“You sound so sure of everything.” I finally said once we where out on the road.

“I’ve never been this sure of anything before. It’s hard to explain why I know the things I know.” She leaned her head back and closed her eyes. A small smile was playing across her lips and for once in my life I knew that everything she had said before was the truth. It felt right. It was right.

I maneuvered through the streets filled with busy cars. Every once in a while I looked over at her. She hadn’t moved since the last time I had looked. I didn’t know how to take it. Was she trying to show me that she trusted me or was it something else?

My fears were squashed instantly when she opened her eyes and looked at me and smiled. She reached out her hand and I took hold of it. She once again closed her eyes. A warm tingling sensation started traveling up my arm and throughout my body. It was the most magnificent feeling that I have ever felt. During the hour drive that it took me to get out of town and to our destination not one word was uttered between the two of us. The silence would have been awkward if it was anyone else but for the two of us it felt natural.

I pulled out onto the cliff and put the safety brake on and unbuckled my belt. She did the same. “This is amazing she said once she looked out the front of the Jeep.” She stepped out and went to the edge. She turned around and her face was beaming with the most beautiful smile that I had ever seen.

“You like it?” I asked. I knew her answer without her even saying anything. She ran and jumped into my arms. Her mouth found mine and her legs wrapped tightly around my waist. I felt her warmth touch my belly because my sweater rose as I held her. I wrapped my arms around her and held her while we kissed. I’m not sure what exactly causes these flashes that we share and I couldn’t deny them.

I stumbled back and leaned against the Jeep for help.

~*~FLASH~*~

“Andra Aliya, this is Zan. He’s to be your guard during these chaotic times.” She peered over her telescope and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. She looked the man that was standing with her father up and down. Little butterflies fluttered within her stomach when she noticed that he was embarrassed with her perusal of his appearance. She nodded her head and went back to peering through the instrument. If she were to gaze upon him for too much longer she would definitely do something unlady like. The king turned to him and smiled and then he waved his hand for Zan to continue down the hall with him. The minute they were out of her room she stood back up and did a little shuffle as if she were walking on air. She danced around to the song in her head and ended up landing on her bed. She closed her eyes and fantasized about her future with such a man.

Her father had tightened the security around the palace and she wasn’t aware of the reason. She stood up and went to her window and looked down. Just as she leaned over to look upon the courtyard she saw him and he was looking up at her and their eyes locked. “It was nice to meet you, your highness.” He sent to her. His mind speak was even more exciting than anything she had ever encountered. She knew then who Zan was, for not all Antarians could mind speak.

“I look forward to seeing you again.” She sent back and from the distance that she was at she could have sworn that his face flushed again.

“Andra Aliya.” I said as I pulled away from her. “I remember. Your name was Andra Aliya. Strong, courageous and defender of the land.” Her eyes were wet from tears that had begun to pool in their corners. The minute I said her name out loud they were released. I rubbed my thumb gently across her cheek to stop them from trailing any further.

“What did you see?” She asked. Her mouth was puffy from the urgency in our kiss.

“I saw the beginning.” I said. “I saw your father introduce us.” I told her. Her legs were still wrapped around my waist and her arms were stabilizing her around my neck. “I’m beginning to remember.” I said with excitement in my voice.

Her eyes clouded some in disappointment and she shook her head. “The flashes that you saw were not yours.” She began. “They were mine.”

“How can you tell?” I thought about it and then realized. She was right. They weren’t my memories but hers. Everything that I had felt were her feelings as the events took place.

She didn’t say anything as she slowly unwrapped her legs from my waist and slid down. She searched my eyes and I saw her do the same act of pushing her hair behind her ear as I did in the flash. She began pacing in front of me. Back and forth she went. “Liz?” She looked up at me and I realized that even though I knew her Antarian name I still preferred to call her Liz. “I know I shouldn’t call you that but it’s hard for me to switch between the two.”

Her face softens at my explanation. “I realize that. Do you know how hard it’s been for me to call you Max? I think I’ve only called you that once all day. To me you’re always going to be Zan, I realize that now.”

“What did you see?” There was something there between us, that wasn’t there before. She shook her head sideways and walked to the edge of the cliff again. The sun was almost at high noon and she tilted her head up and closed her eyes again.

“I’ve never appreciated Earth as much as I do right now.” I started to make my way to her. I made sure to step lightly for I didn’t want to disturb her. “I saw how much you loved being here. Even though you knew you didn’t belong here you love it here. You have a family that loves you and you dread they day that someone comes for you to return.” She turned and looked at me. “I saw them… the ones that tortured you.” She looked away and stared out across the horizon. “Even when they tortured you and you were saved by the others you were glad to be here. I’ve never known peace like that. I would give anything not to know the past. I would give anything to be normal.” She gave a small smile and continued to walk.

“I didn’t want you to see that.” I told her. The images that she must have seen trailed across my mind’s eye. “Why is it all I see is your memories and you mine?” She stopped and turned and then continued back the other way.

“I’m not sure.” She began. “Have you ever tried retrieving your past memories?”

“Once.” I told her. It was with Tess and I didn’t feel too comfortable connecting with her in that way.

“Oh, and…” She asked as she stopped and pinned me with her gaze.

“I couldn’t do it. This is the first time that I have ever received anything like this.” It was my turn to pace. “We don’t know where we came from and we don’t know why we are here. I was hoping that maybe you would be able to help us with that.”

“I can and I will but you have to tell me something first.” It seemed easy enough and I didn’t see any harm in telling her what she wanted to know.

“Do you want to go back?” Okay, that wasn’t what I was expecting her to ask. I stopped and looked at her.

“You know of a way back?” Michael would be thrilled to have this information as well as Tess. The two of them have dreamt of nothing but returning home. How could I tell her home for me was where the ones I loved were? It wasn’t going to be easy.

“Zan… you didn’t answer my question. Would you go back?”

“I don’t know.” I shrugged my shoulder as I told her with no emotion behind it. “I don’t know. I’ve never thought about it. I’ve always thought that I was here for a reason. We are here for a reason, aren’t we?” My thoughts were going in so many different directions and I didn’t know where to begin. She was capable of answering all my questions. The answer to each and every single one of my questions and some that I have never thought of were standing in front of me.

“What do you want to know?” My eyes widened at the thought of the mystery of our lives finally being resolved.

“Um, why are we here?” I stammered out. I guess that’s a good first question. I wish I had an itemized list. With the thought of being able to know anything that I wanted was a little overwhelming.

“I don’t know.” Okay, that’s not what I was expecting; I thought she had all the answers. “What did you and Michael do when you left the table this morning?” She shot back at me as she looked around for a clear space to sit down. Once she had found one she sat and pulled her knees up to her chest. She then wrapped her arms around them. She was so small and I felt like I loomed over her.

“He senses something about you. Didn’t like the fact that you tortured your eggs by smothering them with hot sauce. Only he has the right to do that.” She crinkled her brow as she listened to me. She laid her head on her knees and tilted it just so slightly that she could look up to me. “He’s given me until tomorrow to find out everything that I can about you.”

“And if you don’t?”

“He’ll take matters into his own hands. Well, at least I assume he’ll come up with his own questions for you.” I really had no idea what Michael would do when he asked me his questions and I couldn’t answer them to his satisfaction. She chuckled and her face broke into a grin. It wasn’t the expression that I was expecting from her. “What?”

“Some things never change.” She explained. “Rath’s favorite thing was to take matters into his own hands. Well, at least that’s what I remember from our childhood.”

“Michael’s good. All he’s ever wanted was a family. He didn’t have it so well when he was growing up.” I sat down beside her, resting my arms around my own knees. “We were separated when we came out of our pods. Tess’ pod had been damaged and it didn’t release her at the same time as the rest of us. He had stayed with her for as long as he could but finally he couldn’t stay any longer, hunger drove him out of the cave. The sheriff’s department picked him up and he was placed in foster care.”

“And you. What happened to you?” This wasn’t what I had planned on discussing. I was hoping that we could talk about our home planet but I realized I was being selfish and that there was a lot of time left in the day to get to that.

“Isabel… she couldn’t wait to see where we were. She left and I followed. I was scared. I didn’t want her to get lost. I didn’t really want to leave the pods. We walked and walked and walked. We were in the desert and when nightfall came, we finally found a road. Everything was so dark and I was trying to get her to go back for Michael but she kept on pulling. Headlights had poked their way through the darkness and I pulled harder on her but she would have nothing to do with that.

“Your parents?” She asked. I shook my head yes.

“They found us and took us home. I don’t remember too much more, it was like my brain was taking everything in and was storing it for later use.” She nodded again. “How long are you going to be here?” I don’t know exactly where that question had come from but I needed to know.

She looked up at me puzzled and then probably realized what I was referring to. “I don’t know. It depends on a lot of things. Sometimes I’m here for only a short amount of time and then there are others that are for long stretches of time. I haven’t been able to figure out why the time varies the way it does.” She hesitated for a second before asking, “Why?”

“I just wanted to know.” I reached over and gently pushed her hair behind her ear so I could see her face better. “You know… I was just wondering if it will be like the last time.”

She shrugged her shoulders, not sure what answer to give me, “I’m not sure.” She looked over at me, “What was the last time like?”

“She knew you were coming.” I said. “It scared her because she knew she wouldn’t remember again.” Liz listened while rocking, back and forth as she sat on the ground. The position that she was in now reminded me of last night. Maybe that’s where the question came from.

“Yeah, she would be scared, I’ve run her all over the country.” She shook her head and gave a light laugh that was mostly air and then continued. “I realize that I’m not very good at giving the answers that you are seeking. I thought this would be a lot easier than it really is.”

“I know the feeling.” I slid closer to her and pulled her into my side. As my arm went around her she leaned her head against my shoulder. “What do you remember of your home? Tell me about you.” I asked her.

“You.” It was a one-word answer that could hold so many different meanings. “I remember you the most.” She looked up at me and continued. “I based my life on two times. Before you and after you.” She released her knees turned into a kneeling position beside me. She forced me to straighten out my legs before straddling them. She never broke eye contact as she moved into position. “I don’t know if this will work but I can try to share my memories with you.” She looked deeper into my eyes and I could see the trepidation that was there. She was worried that I wouldn’t want to share with her.

“Really?” She shook her head yes. “Will it hurt?” I sounded like such a pussy.

“No, it won’t hurt if you don’t fight it. If you fight it then it will be like me forcing my memories onto you. I don’t think it will hurt but it will give you a pretty good headache.” She was so close. I was having a hard time keeping myself from pulling her into me and kissing her senseless. Her breath was warm and the air around us was a little chillier than I thought it would be.

“What do I have to do?” There was no question in me wanting to do this or not. I was going to be the first of us to see life on Antar the way it was. She pierced me with her stare. I could see her concern in her eyes. “I’m sure.” I said without her asking.

“Okay, if you’re sure.” She cupped my head at my temples and stared into my eyes. “You need to blank your mind out. Think of nothing and just relax.”

“That’s easier said then done.” I wiggled my eyebrows as I told her and was rewarded with a blush. After all she was straddling my legs and I could feel her heat against my thigh.

“We can do it standing up.” She offered and the first thing I thought of was taking her into my arms and her wrapping her legs around me while I took her to the bedroom. UGH! I was hopeless. I didn’t think I had that dirty of a mind but then again I had never had the perfect girl.

I snapped back to reality, I’d have to save that dream for later, “No, this is fine. I’ll concentrate.”

“Okay. Look and relax and remember these are my memories. Not yours. Things that you see may not seem right but they are the way that I remember them.” I did as she said but her warning was a little more disturbing and it took me a little longer to get settled. I looked at the time and it was fifteen minutes past noon.

~*~FLASH~*~

“I can’t believe that you aren’t ready yet. The gala starts in less than an hour.” Lara scolded her.

“I don’t want to go. It has nothing to do with me.” She wanted to stay in her room and fantasize about Zan, the man that had captured her heart at first sight.

“Nonsense. Ava is turning of age and since your father is not here, you are to head the ceremonies.” She watched as her assistant fluttered around her room. She took out her pale pink dress that had ribbons of gold and white. She stood up and with the help from the other woman she was quickly dressed in her gown. The small crown of gold was placed on top of her head. “Now, was that so hard?” She was asked.

They walked out of her room and down the wide corridor. “How long will father be at the summit?” He had just returned and there was so much that she needed to talk to him about.

“I’m not sure, your highness.” They rounded the corner and the guards snapped to attention and saluted before moving out of the way so they could enter the great hall.

It was beautiful.

The scene blurred over the minute details and they didn’t get clear again until she was walking alone in the night sky.

“You shouldn’t be out here by yourself, your highness.” She whipped around and saw him hiding in the shadows.

“I’m sorry Zan, I just had to get out of there. I have this feeling that something terribly wrong is going to happen and I just don’t know what it is.” She looked at him and her heart rate increased along with the flip flopping action in her stomach.

“No need to apologize. You should have told me. Your father will have my head if anything happens to you on my first day of duty. You are the most important thing in his life.”

“I know.” She said quietly and then continued the walk in silence.

The scene sped up and he saw them sitting along the bank of the red lake watching the two suns rising against the morning horizon. “I must be getting you home. Your father should be home from the summit by now.” He stood up and held his hand out for her to take it. The instant their hands touched she felt a warm tingling sensation travel the length of her arm. She looked up at him and searched his eyes wondering if he felt the same thing.

They let go of one another’s hand and continued to her home. He waited outside her room as she stood in her doorway. She couldn’t take it any longer and she stood up on her tiptoes and kissed him. The force of her need crushed her lips against his. He wrapped his hands around her waist and gently pulled her down from the kiss. His forehead leaned against hers. “I’m sorry, Zan. I stepped over the line. That won’t happen again.”

He gently placed a finger on her mouth to keep her from saying anything further. “Don’t be sorry, never be sorry. I should be the one that’s sorry for my position as your protector forbids me to act upon my feelings.” His eyes were shiny from what she could only guess was his emotions.

“I will talk to my father.” She said firmly.

“I would not feel right if there were someone else that was in charge of your safety. Don’t ask your father to remove me from my station.” She stood tall and looked him in the eye.

“You would rather be my protector than my lover?” She asked.

“If I’m not your protector then I cannot stay.” Zan reached up and gently traced the side of her chin with his finger, “Those are the arrangements my family made for my service to your father. So, please, don’t speak to your father.”

“I don’t understand.” She said as she reached up and grabbed the hand that had been stroking her face. “My father can fix anything. Let me talk to him for us.”

“You’re rushing things, Andra.” Zan gently squeezed her hand trying to get her to understand.

“No I’m not!” Andra dropped Zan’s hand and stepped out of his reach. “I know what I feel for you and I feel it when we touch that you feel the same for me. If you will not stand up for us then I don’t want you for my protector. Your duty here is through. Return home.” She slammed the door on him and went to her bed sobbing.

Her heart had broken into a million pieces.

Her door was thrown open and four guards came in hours later. “Princess Andra Aliya you are under arrest by the order of Lord Khivar for the murder of your father.” They moved in and pulled her off her bed.

“What…”

The connection faded. “I can’t go on any longer.” She said to me. She looked so pale and I grabbed hold of her to steady her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know where to begin and since that was our first time alone together I felt that you should see how it was.”

I looked down at my watch and realized the connection had been almost two hours long. The bright sky had turned over cast and it looked like we were in line for a winter drizzle. The air had dropped a few degrees and I actually shivered. “We better get going before we get caught in the storm that’s heading our way.” She went to get off of me and she wobbled. I grabbed her and steadied her. “Don’t move.” I warned. I held her steady as I worked my way up to a standing position and then bent down and picked her up.

“I’ve got you.” She was so light and her body was as limp as it was last night. She leaned onto my shoulder and closed her eyes. I tilted my head and kissed her forehead. She should have told me that it would weaken her like that. I walked us to the Jeep and settled her into her seat. I buckled the seatbelt and hurried around to the other side. I climbed in and started the Jeep and we were off.

<center>~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~</center>

[Bordersinsanity]

PART 14 ~ ANDRA ALIYA

We eat in silence. I had done something wrong and I didn’t know what it was. Zan wouldn’t tell me, I was sure of that. He finished and I hurried a little so we could move pass this debacle. The waitress came moments later. “Would you like anything else?” She asked.

“No thank you.” He said. She placed the bill on the table and walked away. Zan looked at it and then dug into his back pocket for his wallet. He laid a few bills on the table and then turned to me. “Are you ready?” He stood up and I followed. It reminded me of when Michael and Maria had left.

We walked hand in hand and I couldn’t help but smile at him. It was nice to be able to feel like the way things used to be. How long I have waited for this very moment. “So…” I asked with a hint of playfulness in my voice. “Where are you going to take me now?” I knew we wouldn’t be going back to his place, although that wouldn’t be such a bad idea. Forget about talking when we could get to explore each other’s bodies.

I quickly hopped into my seat of the Jeep and watched as Zan made his way around to his side. He climbed in and together we buckled our seatbelts. “It’s a surprise.” He said. “Do you trust me?” His eyes were pleading for me to say that I did. I realized that no matter how much I knew him, he didn’t have a clue as to who I was before or who we once were. There was never any we to him. The reality of the situation hit me once again.

“Of course I trust you. Don’t you know that I would go anywhere with you? Do anything that I could for you? You’re the reason I’m here and nothing will ever make me think otherwise.” I reached over and grabbed hold of his arm to make him realize how committed I would always be to him. He was my king, he was my husband, but most of all he was my soul.

“Liz… You don’t know me.” I guess I didn’t explain it well enough for him to understand. It was going to be a hard and long day. “How can you be so sure?” He was staring at me as he asked. His eyes were searching for some kind of reaction to his thoughts. I didn’t show him my disappointment I had plenty of experience in schooling my facial expressions not to show what I didn’t want to show. I hated doing it but he didn’t deserve to see my disappointment.

“I know you as well as I know myself.” I began. I wasn’t sure which direction I was going to take but I thought I might as well just go with the flow. “Do you not trust me?” I couldn’t wait for his answer for I know that anyone in their right mind, that wasn’t blind, and could lose everything if their secret was let out of the bag wouldn’t trust a woman after only knowing her for less than twelve hours. “Would you not go anywhere I go, just to be with me? Would you not do anything in your power for me? Our souls are one and in time you will realize that.” Looking at his face I realized that I had gone too far. Maybe I said too much? I smiled at him and when he fumbled with his keys I couldn’t help but laugh. He needed reassurance that it wasn’t the end of the world if he couldn’t answer any of those questions.

“You sound so sure of everything.” We were out on the road before he even dared to speak.

“I’ve never been this sure of anything before. It’s hard to explain why I know the things I know.” I leaned my head against the back of the seat and closed my eyes. Everything was going to be okay. I know that now. I couldn’t help but smile. All the possibilities of what we can do to one another flashed quickly across my mind. I just had to have some patience. That’s all. I could do that. I’ve waited two life times to find him and now that I had I wasn’t about to ruin it.

I felt the Jeep turned a corner and I never once opened my eyes. I trusted Zan with my life. After we worked out the misunderstanding of the real reason he was at the palace I knew that I would always trust him. My father trusted him with my life and so did I.

I was once again catapulted back to my past.

~*~Flash~*~

“I would die for you, my lady.” He was looming over me as I lay on the ground. My dress was wet from rolling around so close to the river. My chest was heaving with attempts at catching my breath. “I would die for you.” He repeated his oath to me.

He was on his knees, straddling my midsection. I couldn’t move. He had me pinned. I looked at him. I knew what he was saying was the truth. He was the only one that spoke for me. Even my own flesh and blood denied that I could be innocent. He leaned over, his face was merely right next to mine. His hand cupped my face and I closed my eyes. The warm tingling sensation warmed my very core and made my hormones soar.

“Why?” I calmly asked. He looked at me with wrinkled brow. “Why did you come for me? I shut the door on you and told you to go home. I was irrational.”

“Love has a way of making us do things that we would normally not do.” He said quietly. His face, still so close. ‘Love? Did he just say Love?’ Every word he spoke sent goosebumps up and down her spine.

I opened my eyes to make sure that I hadn’t allowed the memory to take over. I peeked through my lowered lids and saw him smiling at me. I smiled back and decided that I needed to feel him. My past memory of our first time made me want to touch him. I slid as close to him as the seat belt would allow and wrapped my arms around his as I laid my head on his shoulder. I made sure that he had no objections and then went back to my memory.

“Love? What does love make you do that you would not normally do?” She asked him with a slight twinkle in her eyes. She couldn’t believe that in just a short period of time he was professing his love for her.

“This…” he leaned closer and captured her lips. His other hand quickly grabbed the other side of her face and he slid his tongue across her lips asking her to let him in. She did and the kiss deepened. She grabbed hold of him and when she did he wrapped his hands around her and lifted her to him. Pulling back slightly he whispered into her lips, “I’ve loved you from the moment I first saw you.”

“In my room?” She was referring to when her father had first introduced him to her.

“No, sooner…” He told her. They got back to their feet and hand-in-hand they had begun to walk back to the house that she had fled just moments ago.

Turning in front of him and forcing him to stop she asked, “When did you first see me?” She had to know. Surely she would have saw him too… but then she remembered that he was sent here for another purpose. His family wanted him to watch her to make sure that she would not harm their king. Of course she wouldn’t have seen him. He was lurking in the shadows. Watching her when she least expected it.

Laughing he picked her up in his arms and continued back to the house, “I saw you in my dreams.” He kicked open the door and took them to his room. He laid her down on the bed and followed her. She kissed him with so much hunger she felt like she was no longer a woman but an animal in search of her prey.

I opened my eyes when I felt the smooth road turn into a bumpy dirt one. I sat up straighter and took a few deep breaths in hope of controlling my hormones. I used to love those memories but now that I was here I wasn’t so sure I wanted to live in the past.

The moment I took in our surroundings my breath that I had just taken was taken away. “This is amazing.” I hopped out of the Jeep as soon as it came to a stop and walked to the edge of the cliff. The horizon spanned for what seemed like an eternity. It was beautiful. Definitely the most beautiful spot that I had ever been. I turned around and looked at him. My face was beaming. I could feel my smile from ear to ear.

“You like it?” I don’t know if it was my raging hormones or what but I couldn’t stand it. I ran and jumped into his arms. No one had ever done anything like this for me before. I couldn’t get close enough to him. I wrapped my legs around his waist and kissed him. I wanted to share everything that I was with him and I wanted to let him know that there was no one else for me but him.

I should have known with my heightened sexual tension that I would induce another series of flashes.

~*~FLASH~*~

He was alive. He had made it through the worst few days of his life and he hoped to God that he would never have to experience anything like that ever again. He was out in the desert watching the sun rise the day after his escape. There were people in this world that were mean and cruel. Hateful to anything that they didn’t believe.

Images of his awful experience zoomed in front of her and just when she thought she wasn’t going to make it through there was a light at the end of the tunnel. She walked closer and closer to the light wanting to know what was so special about it. When she reached the end she realized what had kept him alive while those madmen held him captive.

Face after face flew by her eyes. He loved them all. He didn’t know who he really was but none of that mattered for the people that she was seeing were the ones that mattered most to him.

“Andra Aliya.” He said as he pulled us apart. My heart was aching. How could he have lived through all of that and still be such a gentle and kind person? Tears are pooling in the corners of my eyes. The sound of my name coming out of his mouth is adding more emotion to the ones that are already running rampant through my body. He’s smiling at me. “I remember. Your name was Andra Aliya. Strong, courageous and defender of the land.” My father had named me that just to spite the seer. Aliya was just another stab at him. Defender of the land? Ha, I was prophesized to destroy all of Antar. He brushed the tears that no longer could hold their form in the corners away with his thumb.

“What did you see?” I had to ask. I so hoped that he didn’t see anything as painful as I did. I curled my lip in to try to get it to stop tingling. His eyes sparkled like a four-year-old kid on Christmas morning that just got the one toy they had ever wanted Santa to bring them.

“I saw the beginning.” He began. “I saw your father introduce us.” He embraced me tighter into a tighter hug. “I’m beginning to remember.” And with that I knew why he was so happy. He thought he had begun to remember. How was I going to tell him that they weren’t his memories but mine?

I shook my head no. “The flashes that you saw were not yours. They were mine.”

“How can you tell?” I slowly unwrapped my legs from around his waist and slid down. He was a strong man. He would be able to take anything that I could tell him. I pushed a piece of hair behind my ear. It was tickling the side of my face and I really needed to concentrate.

I so didn’t want to tell him that his memories may never come back. That the one gift that my family possessed was the gift of sharing and connecting. I began to pace in front of him. “Liz?” My head shot up. I don’t know which I prefer to be called by him. My Antarian name or my Earth name. “I know I shouldn’t call you that but it’s hard for me to switch between the two.” He was sorry for calling me by the name that he knew me to be. I couldn’t wrong him for that.

“I realize that. Do you know how hard it’s been for me to call you Max? I think I’ve only called you that once all day. To me you’re always going to be Zan, I realize that now.” We welcomed what we both knew. I knew him as Zan and he had come to know me as Liz. It didn’t really matter, did it? I don’t know. Maybe. Maybe it was a sign of things to come. Him on Earth and me on Antar, after all it was I that was destined to take down the ruling king and right now that king was Khivar. I would give anything to destroy the man that I knew had killed my father.

“What did you see?” He asked. I didn’t want to tell him what I had seen in my visions from him. I knew what it would do to him just knowing that that was what came to me when we connected. I needed time to think of how I was going to put it to him so I shook my head and walked to the edge of the cliff again. I looked to the heavens and to home and called silently for help. I closed my eyes and looked for the person deep within me for help. I needed to have the right words. I didn’t want to hurt him.

When they finally came I started. “I’ve never appreciated Earth as much as I do right now.” He was coming closer to me, probably because my voice was a little louder than a whisper. “I saw how much you loved being here. Even though you knew you didn’t belong here you loved it here. You have a family that loves you and you dread the day that someone comes for you to return.” I turned to look at him and saw his confusion. I couldn’t keep it from him any longer it wasn’t fair. “I saw them… the ones that tortured you.” I quickly looked back out across the horizon. I don’t think I would have been able to continue if I continued to look up at him. “Even when they tortured you and you were saved by the others you were glad to be here. I’ve never known peace like that. I would give anything not to know the past. I would give anything to be normal.” I turned my back on him unsure of what else I could have done.

“I didn’t want you to see that.” He told me. I gave him an understanding smile and waited for him to ask what he wanted. That’s why we were here after all. We were out in the middle of nowhere to find out answers to the many questions that he had. “Why is it all I see is your memories and you mine?” His voice was pleading for me to give him a solid answer and I couldn’t. Just another way of disappointing him.

“I’m not sure. Have you ever tried retrieving your past memories?” I’m not sure if he has them or not but it’s possible that they are just suppressed so deeply that he hasn’t triggered them yet.

“Once.” I waited for him to elaborate on how the outcome had turned out but it never came.

“Oh, and…” so I decided to pry.

“I couldn’t do it. This is the first time that I have ever received anything like this.” He started to pace and I wondered what had made him uneasy. “We don’t know where we came from and we don’t know why we are here. I was hoping that maybe you would be able to help us with that.”

“I can and I will but you have to tell me something first.” At least I hoped that I would be able to help him. “Do you want to go back?” I knew that weighed heavily on his conscious. His mother’s message from the communicators telling them that they were expected to come back and free them was too much. They were only kids with no one to teach them yet they had the weight of their world and the lives of their people on their shoulders. The next time I see Shara I’m going to smack her.

“You know of a way back?” There was a mixture of emotions swirling around in his dark amber eyes, hope, joy as well as sadness.

“Zan… you didn’t answer my question. Would you go back?” I had to know where he stood. I needed to know for when the time was right and I had to return if he would be coming or if he was going to stay.

“I don’t know.” He grounded out as he shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. I’ve never thought about it. I’ve always thought that I was here for a reason. We are here for a reason, aren’t we?” I wanted to tell him that of course they were here for a reason. We all were but was his reason for being called back different than mine?

“What do you want to know?” I was onto something and I needed to think about a few things. I should be making a list that I could ask Mira about.

“Um, why are we here?” He did as I had asked.

“I don’t know.” They came after me. I had no idea why they were sent here. I thought about the communication that I had seen from an earlier flash and realized that they were sent as a group. They had a warrior, a visionary, a mind walker and a healer. They were a complete group. But why? I was hung up and I need more information. “What did you and Michael do when you left the table this morning?” I wanted to sit down; I was tired of pacing and standing. I looked for a clear spot and sat down. Expecting not to like what he was about to tell me I pulled my knees up to my chest for security.

“He senses something about you. Didn’t like the fact that you tortured your eggs by smothering them with hot sauce. Only he has the right to do that.” Great. I was too relaxed at breakfast. I rested my head on my arms and looked up to him. I was waiting for him to continue. “He’s given me until tomorrow to find out everything that I can about you.”

“And if you don’t?” I needed to know if I was in danger. If all I had to do is tell Michael the truth then I would but if I wasn’t in any danger from his paranoia then I would wait and see if I could get more information. Information that would help me do what was needed to be done.

“He’ll take matters into his own hands. Well, at least I assume he’ll come up with his own questions for you.” I could see the worry set of his eyes. He was scared of what Rath would do to me if Zan didn’t provide him with a reasonable amount of answers. It was sort of cute how he had gone into the protective mode of me. Some things will never change no matter how long or how far a soul has traveled. “What?” He asked. I guess he saw my amused expression on my face.

I felt like I should explain my amusement with the idea of Rath taking things into his own hands. “Some things never change. Rath’s favorite thing was to take matters into his own hands. Well, at least that’s what I remember from our childhood.” Rath’s idea of taking things into his own hands was to stomp around acting mad until he cooled off. He has no patience at all.

“Michael’s good. All he’s ever wanted was a family. He didn’t have it so well when he was growing up.” He sat down beside me and mirrored my position. “We were separated when we came out of our pods. Tess’ pod had been damaged and it didn’t release her at the same time as the rest of us. He had stayed with her for as long as he could but finally he couldn’t stay any longer, hunger drove him out of the cave. The sheriff’s department picked him up and he was placed in foster care.” I couldn’t believe that he was telling me what he was. This was a huge step for him for I knew that he has never trusted anyone to a point that he told the whole story.

He paused for a second and I couldn’t help but ask for more. “And you. What happened to you?” I straightened up and focused all my attention on him.

“Isabel… she couldn’t wait to see where we were. She left and I followed. I was scared. I didn’t want her to get lost. I didn’t really want to leave the pods. We walked and walked and walked. We were in the desert and when nightfall came, we finally found a road. Everything was so dark and I was trying to get her to go back for Michael but she kept on pulling. Headlights had poked their way through the darkness and I pulled harder on her but she would have nothing to do with that.”

“Your parents?” I was hanging on his every word looking at his profile as his eyes looked into the distance. Hearing about how he came to this world and what he had to go through to survive was amazing.

“They found us and took us home. I don’t remember too much more, it was like my brain was taking everything in and was storing it for later use.” He tore his eyes away from the canyon and glanced at me, “How long are you going to be here?” His question came out of nowhere that I didn’t really know what he was referring to.

I looked at him and it finally hit me what he wanted to know. I wish I knew some of his answers. I wanted to give him something that he so desperately deserved to know. It just wasn’t fair. After all this time, we had found one another and then all we really were to one another were total strangers. It just wasn’t fair. “I don’t know. It depends on a lot of things. Sometimes I’m here for only a short amount of time and then there are others that are for long stretches of time. I haven’t been able to figure out why the time varies the way it does.” I looked up at him and searched to see if the answer I had given him was adequate or not for him. I couldn’t tell. “Why?”

“I just wanted to know.” He pushed a piece of hair behind my ear and then continued. “You know… I was just wondering if it will be like the last time.” His voice was so quiet. He was so unsure of what the topic would do to me.

I shrugged not really knowing what he wanted to hear from me. “I’m not sure. What was the last time like?” I looked at him waiting for him to answer. I had never had the nerve to ask anyone what the other side was like. Never and now I had my chance.

“She knew you were coming.” He began. “It scared her because she knew she wouldn’t remember again.” I started to rock back and both. I had seen it before. When we were in therapy the doctor had kept us isolated until the change had happened. She always knew when I was coming. She sort of had a sense of it. I felt badly for her, for me, and for Zan. What was it going to be like for the three of us?

I realized that he was staring at me, he was waiting for an answer. “Yeah, she would be scared, I’ve run her all over the country.” I didn’t add that it was all for him. I shook my head and laughed at myself. It didn’t matter what I did or what she did we had found him in the end and that was what was important. Wasn’t it? “I realize that I’m not very good at giving the answers that you are seeking. I thought this would be a lot easier than it really is.” I tried to offer the only comfort that I was able to give to him.

“I know the feeling.” He put his arm around me and pulled me into his side and the instantaneous warmth filled my body. I leaned my head on his shoulder like I had done so many times in our first life. I closed my eyes and savored the feeling. A feeling of home. I was finally home, or was I? “What do you remember of your home? Tell me about you.”

The sound of his voice was soothing and before I knew it I was answering his question without even thinking about it. “You. I remember you the most.” I looked up at him expecting a trapped looked or even a cornered look but it wasn’t there. When you tell a man that the only thing you remember of your past life is him he’s bound to feel overwhelmed. But Zan wasn’t. Max wasn’t. “I based my life on two times. Before you and after you.” Then it hit me. My gift of sharing… I could show him my life. It would be so much easier than trying to tell him everything. I turned my body and was in a kneeling position beside him. He still had his knees pulled up and I placed my hand on them to show him I wanted him to straighten them out. He did without question and I moved to where I was straddling his legs. We moved in unison without breaking eye contact. “I don’t know if this will work but I can try to share my memories with you.” He didn’t even flinched I looked for it but he didn’t show any signs of being scared of who I was and what I could do. It would take a lot of getting used to.

“Really?” I nodded. “Will it hurt?” He asked. I didn’t smile and I didn’t laugh. Even though he thought that there might be some kind of possibility of me hurting him he didn’t shy away from me.

“No, it won’t hurt if you don’t fight it. If you fight it then it will be like me forcing my memories onto you. I don’t think it will hurt but it will give you a pretty good headache.” I kept on drifting closer and closer to him as if each of us were a different pole of a magnet. Did he have any idea how hard it was for me not to let my instinct overwhelm me? Did he know how hard it was for me to keep my distance? To be this close to the love of my life and for him not to act the same way was hard but I was here for a reason. At least I think I am.

“What do I have to do?” He asked and once again I searched his eyes to make sure he was sure. “I’m sure.” He answered to my look. A small tickle ran up from the pit of my stomach. Our connection? Or was he just that perceptive? Either way I liked it.

“Okay, if you’re sure.” I cupped his head and looked him in the eyes. “You need to blank your mind out. Think of nothing and just relax.”

“That’s easier said then done.” He wiggled his eyebrows and his eyes darkened with a look that I hadn’t seen in this lifetime. I felt my temperature rise as my body reacted to his joke and was fully aware how close we were.

“We can do it standing up.” I thought that might help keep both of us focused.

“No, this is fine. I’ll concentrate.” He assured me. I wasn’t so much worried about him but me. What if I couldn’t concentrate?

“Okay. Look and relax and remember these are my memories. Not yours. Things that you see may not seem right but they are the way that I remember them.” I thought I would continue with the scene from earlier. What I had done when he and my father had left my room. After all it was the beginning.

I looked into his eyes and let the connection take over. The images took off almost immediately but there was a problem. They weren’t traveling as fast as I thought they would. I tried not to panic and remembered what I had told him; just relax. I could always end the connection whenever I needed to. I might as well sit back and enjoy the beginning.

<center>~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~</center>

“I can’t go on any longer.” I said as the connection faded way too soon. There was so much that I needed to get to. I didn’t want him to see us end on a bad note. I wanted him to be able to see it all. “I’m sorry.” I was light headed and began to wobble. He grabbed hold of me and steadied me. “I didn’t know where to begin and since that was our first time alone together I felt that you should see how it was.”

I could see the concern in his eyes for me as he looked at his watch and then back up at me. He gave me a reassuring smile and then looked up at the sky. I followed his gaze and realized that we were in for some bad weather. “We better get going before we get caught in the storm that’s heading our way.” I took that as my cue that he wanted me to get off of him so I did. The movement caused me to sway again and he told me, “Don’t move.” He said. He stood up and then leaned over and picked me up. The quick movement made me lean my head onto his shoulder so I wouldn’t loose consciousness. “I’ve got you.” I felt him lean over and kiss my forehead. His warm breath makes the loss of strength so very worth it.

He buckled me into my seat. I didn’t open my eyes or move from the position that he had placed me in. We were off in no time. Once we were on the highway and he no longer needed to keep his hand on the stick shift he grabbed hold of my hand. “Are you okay?” He asked.

I peered through half-opened eyes and smiled at him. “I’m fine. Thanks.”

“Is that normal for you to get weak?”

“No, I don’t think so. It’s the first time that I had ever tried to do that on Earth. Maybe it’s the human form that slowed the connection down, I just don’t know. My list of things to ask the next time I return to the other side is getting longer by the minute.” I tried to lighten the atmosphere but I don’t think it was helping. “I could tell you the rest of what happens if you want me too?”

“If you’re up to it I would really like to know what happened.” He took a chance and glanced my way. My head was leaning back against the back of the seat and I smiled at him.

“My father was dead. I was accused of his murder because I was unaccounted for during the gala.” I started.

“But, that’s crazy. You were with me the entire night.” He interrupted me and I had to squeeze his hand because I appreciated his comment.

“I know that and you know that but at the time they didn’t. You see…” Here it goes. “When I was born there was a seer present.”

“A seer?”

“Yes, he looks upon the soul of the new born child and predicts its destiny.”

“But that’s ridiculous. The future can’t be told.” I had to smile at him for he was so naïve.

“Yes, it can." I knew that I had to explain myself. “Let me finish the scene that I had begun I don’t want to jump ahead.” He nodded his head and I took a breath and continued. The memory was so fresh in my mind that I found myself reliving it.


~*~FLASH~*~

They dragged me out of my rooms and hauled me to the dungeon. “Princess Andra Aliya you have been charged with the murder of the king. How do you plead?” Rath’s voice filled the small cell with an echoing boom.

“I didn’t do it, Rath. I swear.”

“You left the gala early, Andra. Where did you go?” He asked. His voice not so domineering.

“I was with Zan. Find Zan. He’ll tell you that I speak the truth.”

“I wish it were that easy, cousin. I’ve looked for him and he’s nowhere to be found.”

“That can’t be. I just…” I realized that I had slammed the door on him and told him to go home. He had done what I had told him and now my life depended on him being found.

“You what?” Rath asked.

“He’s gone.” I said in a whisper. Tears finally broke loose and they rolled down my cheek. Rath opened the cell door and walked in. “I swear on my life, Rath I didn’t kill my father. He was all I had.”

“I know, Andra. I know. I’m just doing my job.” He took me into his embrace and tried to comfort me. “If it were up to me you wouldn’t be down here but your uncle says that the people are demanding your holding. He says that if he showed favoritism now that there would be an uprising and a war would soon break out. He’s doing everything he can to maintain peace. The prophecy has started.”

“I was down there for three weeks before you came back.” I saw him wince at the information that I had just told him.

“What took me so long?”

“You had no way of knowing. You thought my absence from communication was because I no longer wanted anything to do with you.”


~*~FLASH~*~

“Andra!” He ran down the stairs as quickly as he could. He stumbled on the last two and came crashing to the bars that imprisoned me.

“Zan!” I grabbed hold of his face and kissed him with all my might. “You’re alive. I was so worried. No one could find you and Rath’s looked everywhere for you.”

“I’m sorry my love. I should have known. I was so foolish to run away like that.” I laid a gentle finger on his lips to quiet him.

“All that matters is that you’re here now. You’re finally here.”

“Guards. I demand you unlock this door now!” He yelled with authority.

They did as he demanded and I launched myself into his arms. He carried me up the stairs and back to my rooms. I gently laid my head on his shoulder as he carried me. “Andra, you’ve lost so much weight. Have they not been feeding you?” I looked up into his worried gazed and then replaced my head back on his shoulder.

I was so relieved to be out of that hellhole and to find out that he was safe. My worse nightmare was that someone had killed him too. Everyone that held a special place in my heart had been ripped away all in one night. “They fed me, Zan but I didn’t eat much. I couldn’t. I was so worried that something terrible had happened to you.”

“But Rath, where was he? Why didn’t he help you?”

“I haven’t seen him since I was first imprisoned. I think my uncle sent him away.” Seeing the look on Zan’s face she continued, “It was for the best. Everyone thinks I’m guilty and Rath would just get himself in trouble trying to protect me.”

“But you’re innocent Andra. You should be fighting this. You shouldn’t be in the dungeons.”

“Zan, the seer has spoken. The prophecy is taking place. This is my destiny.” She tried to explain to Zan, “Anyway, it wasn’t worth fighting, I’d just lose anyway and after you left I thought I had driven you away for ever, I couldn’t bear the thought of continuing.”

“Shhh, my love, don’t speak of that ever again. I’m here and I will never leave you again. I promise.” He palmed the lock on my door and it swung open.

He took me and laid me gently on the bed. He then kissed me on the forehead and left me. I watched him head toward the bathroom and when he disappeared I heard the water for the tub begin to run. I looked down and realized that I was filthy. The dungeon wasn’t the cleanest and it showed. My dress was torn and dirty from weeks of wearing. He returned shortly and picked me up and took me into the room. I don’t know if it was from not eating or the reality that I was finally safe but when he stood me up on my own I went tumbling down to the floor. I started to cry at my helplessness and he just cradled me.

“Shh… I’m here now.” He began to unbutton my dress and when all that was left was for me to slip out of it he hesitated. My eyes begged for him to continue I didn’t care what the consequences was all I knew was that I wanted what was to come next.

Seeing that he wasn’t going to take the dress off the rest of the way I did if for him. It pooled around my waist and I as soon as the cool air hit my bare skin my breasts reacted, the nipples hardening as he looked. He took a sudden intake of breath and as he looked me up and down. I saw the hunger in his eyes surface. “You are so beautiful.” He said. He captured my lips with his own and in one swift movement he stood the both of us up.

He held my body away from his and the dress fell the rest of the way down to the floor. He wrapped his strong arms around me and drew me in closer to him. I could feel the rise and fall of his chest. My fingers ached to touch him the way that I knew he wanted to be touched. Suddenly the shirt that he was wearing was too much of a barrier between us and I grabbed at it and pulled it open, buttons flew across the room while our tongues dueled. The taste of him was more than what I had dreamt it would be.

I pushed his shirt back over his shoulders. It stopped because his arms were wrapped so tightly around my body. I tugged at it and he finally loosened one arm and then the other. His shirt joined my dress on the floor. We kissed and our hands roamed each other’s bare skin. When he finally pulled away to catch his breath we were both glowing from our close contact.

He cupped my face in his hand as he looked into my eyes with longing. As he went to run his fingers through my hair he became aware of just how dirty and tangled it had become. “You need to clean up and rest. We can wait.” He said as he gently sat me into the large oval tub that was filled to the brim with hot water. I relaxed even more and settled deep within its warm water. Zan knelt down beside the tub and began lathering the cloth with soap. He reached deep down and grabbed hold of my foot. I lifted it with some assistance and he began to wash me. The gentleness that he took in washing me made my insides flutter with anticipation of what was to come next.

He urged me to lay back and I did as he silently requested by a gentle nudge in the right direction. He poured the water over my hair and then gently began to work in the soap to clean it. It was full of knots from the weeks of neglect. I tried to help him but he just shooed my hands away. “I want to do this. I love your hair. Please, it’s the least I can do for you, my princess.”

“Zan, I’m not your princess. My title has been ripped away from me. The people have spoken and I don’t blame them.”

“Nonsense. You have not heard what the people are saying. They believe in you. I believe in you.”

I sat up straighter and looked up at him. “What do you mean the people believe in me?”

“Just what I said. That’s how I knew where you were. Word has spread over the entire planet on how the seer was wrong that Princess Andra Aliya had been framed.” I shook my head. He had to be wrong. If the people were saying that then my uncle had been lying to me for all of this time.

“What has my uncle been up to?” I asked him.

“I don’t know. He’s locked himself in your father’s quarters. No one has seen him except for Ava.” He continued to work at the knots in my hair as I thought. I slid back down into the water and closed my eyes.

I had fallen asleep and when I awoke I had found that Zan was sitting in a chair beside the bed. He too had fallen asleep. I crawled out of bed and noticed that I was fully dressed. I went to him and kissed his forehead. He woke. “What’s wrong?” He asked.

“You’re not close enough to me.” I said as I pulled on his hand and brought him back to my bed. “I need you close to me, please, share my bed with me.” He hesitated for a brief moment and when I tugged on his hand one more time he made the rest of the trip on his own will.

I straightened in the seat and I was glad that it was cool outside. Reliving those first days out of imprisonment always had this effect on me. They were the greatest days of my life. My face felt hot and I couldn’t help but glance at Zan. He too looked a little hot under the collar. “Sorry.” I said sheepishly, “I lost myself.”

“That’s okay.” Zan replied as he ran his finger under the collar of his shirt, “You’re a great story teller.” We drove for a moment in silence until Zan said, “We’re almost back to town.” He smiled at me and looked at me a little longer than what I would have expected. “How are you feeling? Still tired?” He asked.

“I’m hungry.” I told him.

“Okay, we’ll grab something to eat and then head back to my place because I don’t think the weather will hold out any longer.” I shook my head saying that was fine. We drove through a fast food Mexican restaurant and were back at the apartment.

“Where’s Ava?” I asked. I thought it was strange that I hadn’t seen her in the apartment.

“I don’t know. I’m sure she’s called someone to tell us if she’s okay or not. She usually yells at me when I don’t do it.” He was getting plates down from the cabinets and he set everything out on the table. “Come and eat.” He smiled and waited for me to sit down before he sat down next to me. “So, when you were born you were prophesized to kill the king?”

“Basically.” I took a bite of my burrito, then looked around for the little packets of hot sauce.

“So when your father was murdered they blamed you.” I shook my head yes as I emptied the packet on my burrito. “Why didn’t your family keep you out of the prison?”

“They were between a rock and a hard place. If they supported me before I was proven innocent then they would be looked upon as being unfair.” I took another bite of the burrito and sighed in satisfaction. I quickly took another huge bite; I suddenly realized just how hungry I really was.

“Well isn’t that what your father did when he protected you instead of killing you?”

I worked hard and swallowing down the mouthful of food and reached for my coke and slurped some down so I could answer, “Yes.”

“Khivar killed your father didn’t he?”

“Yes, I know that now but it was a long time before either of us figured that out.” I pushed the remains of my burrito away, suddenly losing my appetite, my uncle killed his brother because he was greedy and I couldn’t do anything to stop it.

Max noticed me pushing my food away and the gleam of unshed tears in my eyes but he was too close to the answers he needed to stop now. He quietly continued, “The seer saw your soul as the one to kill the king but he couldn’t tell which lifetime that it would be did he?” He slowly reached over and held my hand trying to give me some of his strength.

“No… yes… I...” I looked up into his eyes as he waited for my answer. I held his hand in both of mine before continuing, “I have to tell you something. The message. In the orb… from your mother… It was wrong. It’s not your responsibility to return. It never was. It’s mine and now that I found you I know what I have to do. I have to go back and free my people.”

A look of confusion covered Max’s face, “No, you can’t be right. The orb said that I was the king. That I was supposed to come back and free the people.”

I shook my head adamantly, “No, you have it all wrong. You weren’t the king. You were a respected leader of the people, their voice in the council. Your father and mine were allies, when your father died, my father looked to you for support.” I looked to see if he understood his roll on our world. “You weren’t of royal blood Max. That’s why you and your family were left alone when Khivar first came to power. You weren’t a threat to take over the throne.” I had to make sure that he knew that this wasn’t his fight. Even though we had married and he was technically king I didn’t want him to get involved. He had a good thing going for him and I didn’t want to be the reason it got screwed up.

“Then why did Khivar change his mind? Why was my family...”

I cut Zan off before he could continue, “Because of me. Because I… “ I hesitated a second before continuing, I looked down at where our hands were intertwined, I was surprised that Zan wasn’t screaming in pain from the death grip I had on his fingers. “You were murdered because Khivar found out that the love you and I shared was more than anything.” Again Zan looked confused. Politics, Zan didn’t realize how dirty they were; “He didn’t want his daughter tied to a man that wouldn’t love her. To a man that wouldn’t provide an heir.”

“He killed all of us so that his daughter would have a chance to father the next heir to the throne?”

“That was part of it. The people believed in you. They saw you as they did my father. As long as you were just a vocal leader of the opposition Khivar didn’t care about you. But when he found out that you refused to make Ava with child. He grew furious. He would never have the right to the throne. Not without an heir.” I needed to go around things differently. He saw this as his fight more than it was mine.

“Zan, you love it here on earth. I saw it when we connected. This isn’t your fight. It’s between my uncle and me. Your family just got in the way.” I looked in his eyes to see if he understood, “That’s why I have to go back and free my people. I can’t let my uncle win.”

“You can’t do it on your own.” He started.

“I’m not going to ask you guys to go. I can’t. It’s not your destiny to go back but it’s mine. You have a family here.”

“I think we should ask the others before you decide on what you need to do.”

“Khivar doesn’t know that I’m down here. He knows that you are.” I began. “He sent you here so that you would be out of the way. He sent you down here in hopes that you and Ava would grow close to one another and produce a child. You’re safe as long as he still believes that that may still happen.” I still saw his temptation to argue with me so I quickly continued.

“The High Council was suspicious of my uncle and therefore hid the one thing that would give him ultimate power.”

“The Granolith.” He beat me to the punch line.

“Yes. The granolith is very powerful and if Khivar ever got control of it and the ability to use it he would be invincible.”

“If it’s so powerful how come the High Council didn’t use it against Khivar.”

“They can’t.”

“Why can’t they?” Our banter went back and forth. It was a hot potato and neither one of us was going to let it rest on our side for very long.

“There’s a few reasons why they can’t.” I paused for emphasis. “First reason is because they don’t have the seal.”

“Seal? What seal? What does it look like and who does have it?” Surely he knew what the seal was. Maybe I was wrong.

I know I looked embarrassed. I really didn’t want to tell him this way, “The Seal of Power. The seal that is passed down from parent to child and then from child to spouse. The cycle continues on and on. As far as who has the seal that’s simple. You do.” I took a deep breath and then continued. “That’s why I’m here Max. When I merge with this body my soul is here but I won’t have the seal with me. Without the seal I can’t use the Granolith. Only the one with the Seal of Power can use the Granolith.”

Max threw his hands up, stopping me, “Now I’m totally lost. The High Council sent the Granolith down here with us because they were afraid that Khivar would use it. But you just said that he sent Ava and I down here to create an heir. If you don’t have the seal and I do…” It finally dawned on him. “Ava and I never consummated our marriage. She didn’t have the seal and Khivar realized that I would never give it to her.” He was finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. “Your soul has the seal but this body doesn’t.” I nodded in agreement. “And I’m supposed to have a copy of this seal somewhere?” Again I agreed with him. I stood up from the table. I was tired and my head hurt.

“How do I pass the seal onto you?” My face flushed.

“The Seal of Power can only be passed through the act of love.” I had only known him for such a short time and here I was asking him to make love to me so I could go back and kill the man, that I despised more than anything did in my life. Most men would jump at the chance to have sex with a girl no strings attached, but I knew that Max would think differently about it. To Max there would always be strings attached if he made love to someone. He held all the cards and there was nothing I would be able to do to “I can’t talk about this any longer. My head hurts and I need to go lie down.” I leaned over the table my hands firmly pressed down. “ I’m going to kill the king of Antar and I’m going to change the way that the people are living there. That is my destiny and I am not going to stop until I have fulfilled it.”

“So, I have sex with you and you leave?” Max asked through gritted teeth. “That’s what all this is about? You want to use me to get the seal?”

I dropped my head in to my hands in defeat. “You really don’t get it Max. You don’t understand. It’s not sex that allows us to share the seal, it’s love. We have to connect and make love.” I looked up into his eyes and saw the confusion there, “This is useless, you don’t remember a thing. You still don’t realize what we meant to each other in the past.” I stood back up and walked to the door. When I opened it up I knew that I would be stuck here for some time. It had begun to rain and a cold wind whipped the door out of my hand.

Somehow Max appeared right behind me, “Don’t go.” He quietly whispered next to my ear. “Stay here. There’s so much that we need to talk about. So much that I have to understand.” He gently laid a hand on my shoulder and I stiffened. I could feel the nervous energy that he held.

“I’m not going to change my mind.” I stated firmly.

“You don’t have to. Stay and rest with me. I don’t want you to leave just yet.” I closed my eyes and the picture of us in the throws of passion filled my mind. I shook my head to clear my memories away. He wasn’t suggesting that he would give me the seal. He was just telling me that he didn’t want me to leave so soon.

I turned and looked at him. His eyes were begging for me to stay. There wasn’t a place I would rather be. He took hold of my hand and led me to the back of the apartment where the bedrooms were located. I sat down on his dark blue covered bed and he knelt down and took off my shoes. He pulled the covers back and waited until I lay down before he covered me up. He walked over to the other side and did the same thing. He lay down behind me and I felt him scoot in closer. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the side of my cheek. “Sweet dreams, Andra.”

I closed my eyes and fought the tears that were threatening to fall. “You too, Max.” Him calling me by my Antarian name didn’t go unnoticed. He knew that was who I was. Who I would always be. He had no pretense of me being anyone else and it made me sad. He and I would always be too different.

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[Bordersinsanity]

Okay... I posted this over at Roswell Fanatics because there seemed to be a lot of question. Even though no one's really asking for it I'm going to post it here.


Antarian History 101

You have:

Kaneth - Ruler of the Five planets and King of Antar – Dead
Mira - Wife to Kaneth and mother of Andra Aliya -- Dead
Andra Aliya - Princes and first wife to Zan -- Dead

Khivar - Brother to Kaneth and current ruler of the Five Planets and acting King of Antar
Chandier - Wife to Khivar and mother of Ava -- Dead
Ava - 2nd wife to Zan -- Dead

Tykar - High Council Member of Shadik - Providence that resides on Antar -- Dead
Muri - Wife to Tykar and sister to Mira
Rath - Son and Vilondra's betrothed -- Dead

Tabir - High Council Member of Chanir - Providence that resides on Antar -- Dead
Shara - Wife to Tabir and mother of Zan and Vilondra
Zan - Son and widowed husband of Andra Aliya -- Dead
Vilondra - Daughter and sister to Zan betrothed to Rath -- Dead

Okay I see some confused faces... Have I lost you already?

So, you have Andra in the center. Rath's family is on her Mother's side and you have Ava's on her father's side...

Zan and Andra were married just months after her father's death... details will come later... that's all I'm saying.

Zan and Ava were married just months after Andra's death... details will come later... The "Royal Four" as you know it were sent to earth years later.

Andra came to earth because the High Council found a loop and sent her much later.

Does that help? I hope so. I'm sure that I'm missing something...


OH YEAH,

Liz and Andra are in the same body... When and if one goes they both go...

The only way the seal can be transferred is by making love, not having sex, making love, there's more to it, so yes, there will be some dreamer action to come.

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[Bordersinsanity]

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<center>Best Portrayal of Michael Guerin in ROUND TWO
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PART 15 ~ Michael

I am in hell. No matter where I go she is there. Sure, I took Maria to the dorms to see if Liz was there and she wasn’t. There’s nothing wrong with Maria having a normal friend but the more I think about it the more I realize that deep down in the back of my mind I have a feeling that Liz Parker isn’t going to be just a normal friend.

I didn’t really want to be the stick in the mud. After all, Maria was jumping up and down on the furniture in the middle of the restaurant. Didn’t she know that there were a lot of senior citizens in here and the sight of her jumping up and down along with her whooping could possibly be the cause of a few minor heart attacks? I don’t think that even crossed her mind. I don’t know why it crossed mine. Maybe the more I concentrate on other things the less the girl sitting across from me would bother me.

Sure I was the one in the group that hated outsiders the most but even I thought I was going a little overboard with it and all. I couldn’t keep from looking at her. It bothered the hell out of me that Max was just catering to her every whim. Excuse me… Could you bring a couple of cups of peanut butter? I’ll give him peanut butter. The waitress quickly left and was back in a flash. Max placed one cup of peanut butter beside Liz. I sat an observed.

I couldn’t believe my eyes. She reaches for the Tabasco sauce with no hesitation. She unscrews the lid. I’m still waiting for her to realize that that stuff is hot and that she didn’t look like the type of person that went around eating hot sauce on everything. I’m still waiting but she doesn’t stop. She tips the bottle and pours it onto her eggs. I don’t mean a little here and there, I mean she completely covers almost every morsel of egg on her plate. I whip my head to Maria and then to Max. Did he see what I was seeing?

No. You’ve got to be kidding me. I don’t believe that his defenses are down like this. There’s no other explanation. She’s one of us. I should have realized that last night. The vibes in the air. The vibes right now. I probably would have noticed it a lot sooner if I had a stocking cap pulled over my eyes. Evidently my death glare that I have focused on Max isn’t working today. What’s new?

I shove away from the table. “Excuse me, I’ll be right back.” I stare at Maxwell the entire time in hopes that he would get a fucking clue. He doesn’t. I can’t believe this. He’s sitting there as if nothing’s wrong.

I hear Maria say Max’s name and I know that she has sent him after me. She’s no fool she knows what we saw. That’s my girl. I get back to the hallway where the restrooms are and I wait. What’s taking him so long? I’m working myself into a frenzy and the only thing that is going to help is if I hit something.

Finally, I stop pacing like a caged tiger at a zoo as Max nonchalantly walks around the corner and stops only a few feet away from me. “What the hell are you doing, Maxwell?”

“I’m here to eat breakfast.” Likely excuse. I felt like screaming – Hello! But knew that wouldn’t do any good. He’s doing this just to piss me off. Why does he do this to me? It’s never been easy between the two of us. I don’t know why? Maybe because he’s the leader and he doesn’t lead. That could be it.

I realize that we weren’t going to solve anything like this. “You know that’s not what I mean. What is she doing here?” I nod my head in the direction of where we had left the girls. He looks at them and stares at her. He is so totally gone. I can’t believe it. In less than twelve hours he’s fallen into oblivion.

“She’s eating breakfast.” That was the last straw. I can’t believe he’s joking about something as serious as this? Maybe she’s mind warping him… that’s it. I grab hold of his shirt and push him against the wall. She had her hooks into him good. I’ve never seen him act like this.

“What did she do?” Did he have any idea what she can do? He’s like, totally gone on her in such a short time. Then it hits me. “Spend the night?”

“That’s none of your business.” He’s taking it the wrong way. He thinks I’m worried about his sex life. I’m only trying to protect him while junior is calling all the shots. He’s not thinking with the right head. He pushes me away from him and he stands tall. He finally looks like he could lead us. Too bad it was out of anger. “That’s none of your god damn business.” I see his jaw clench. The muscles moving ever so slightly in his cheeks as he starts to pace in the small hallway.

“What? Did you forget about Tess so quickly?” She was capable of mind warping anyone anywhere and if Liz were like Tess, then Max would never know it was happening to him. Someone needed to look out for him and he can hate me all he wants to. I’m not going to let him take the rest of us down just because his johnson is wanting some action.

“What’s this all about? You know that this has nothing to do with Tess.” He continues to pace. Boy does he have it all wrong. Maybe I should point it out to him but before I can say anything he continues. “What’s got you so upset, Michael? Really? It isn’t the fact that I’m here eating breakfast with Liz and it’s not because of Tess. It was just last night that you told me I needed to quit encouraging her. So, tell me. What’s wrong?” Well I guess that answers my question. He really has no idea what is going on.

This wasn’t going to be easy. I ran my hands through my hair. It was a habit of mine. I was frustrated and when I get frustrated my hair feels like it’s standing on end. I took a deep breath and as I released it I let my confession be heard. “There’s something about her.” Not much reaction from that except he stops pacing and is looking at me. What’s new? He never takes my paranoia seriously. I know that I’m not wrong about this. I know there is something about her. “I can’t really put my finger on it.” He’s staring at me and he takes a step forward and just as I go to reach for my hair again he stops me. What the… I didn’t want to be calmed down. Don’t patronize me. “She practically drowned her eggs with hot sauce. That’s not normal.” I think I finally got through to him. I take a deep breath and begin to relax.

“I know. Believe me and when I find out what it is what it all is. I will tell you about it. But for now don’t ruin this for me. Can’t you be happy that I found someone? Someone who is actually for me, like Maria is for you. Don’t do this. Please.” I don’t know how he can do this to me. Here I was ready to protect him by going after her but he’s making me see his point of view. Damn! He was right I should let him deal with it but it didn’t mean that I had to like it any.

“Tomorrow, Maxwell. You have until tomorrow to tell me what it is. I’ll be watching you.” He had to know that I wasn’t going to let the two of them out of my sight. I was going to make sure that she didn’t do anything that we would all regret and there was no way that I was going to eat breakfast with her until I found out what she was up to.

I made my way to Maria and what began as our table. “Are you done?” She gave me a look that could have laid me out on the floor if she were an alien. Lucky for me she wasn’t.

“Why what’s wrong?” It didn’t take her long to realize that I was serious, that there was something wrong with this situation. I thought for sure that out of any of us she would know what sat across the table from her. She was always so good at getting the vibes.

“Remember our conversation this morning?” She owed me and she should know not to ask any questions. At first I thought I was going to have to explain it to her all over again but she ended up shaking her head anyway. “Well, now is one of those times. I need to go.” I held out my hand and she took it. Hesitantly but she took it.

She stopped next to Liz and leaned over and hugged her. I could only hear a little bit of what she was saying. I’m sure she would end up telling me later. I wasn’t too concerned about it. Not yet anyway.

“Maxwell.” My one word warning was enough for him. He knew I meant business.

We walked out of the restaurant and got into the Jetta. The drive home was going to be torture if Maria didn’t offer some information. We were about ten minutes from home when she finally broke the silence. “She’s one of you, isn’t she?”

I whipped my head in her direction. “Did she tell you that?”

“No, not in so many words. I should have known. That morning at the coffee shop, I should have put two and two together.” I knew she had been ignoring her instincts. She should have told me. We could have stopped it before it happened.

“What did she say that day?” I was so engrossed in finding out what Liz had told Maria that I almost missed our turn to the apartment. I cranked the wheel and saw Maria lurch to her side of the door.

“I don’t know…” I knew what she was doing. She was editing her version of the conversation so I wouldn’t get upset over it.

“Think!” I yelled and Maria shrank away from me. I had known Liz for less than twenty-four hours and she was causing more and more problems. This was not a good thing. Not a good thing at all.

“Is she your enemy?” Maria asked weakly. That makes me think. Is she our enemy? I had no idea. Maybe I was overreacting all together. There’s nothing wrong with being cautious and there were a lot of people whose lives could be in jeopardy if the wrong people infiltrated our little group. Maria was going to tell me what she knew about the new girl. And she was going to tell me now. I looked over and saw the fear in her eyes, was it there because I was losing control or was it there because she had brought a possible enemy into the group? Screaming at Maria wouldn’t solve anything but I couldn’t seem to help myself.

“Damn it! What did she say, Maria?” My voice rose an octave, the anger lacing almost every word, every word but her name.

I’m not sure if it was the tone I was using or if it was something else that caused Maria to come to tears. “She asked me if I believed in reincarnation. She said that she remembers her other life. She was a queen and was heavily guarded to keep her safe.”

Reincarnated? Queen? Heavily guarded? This was not making any sense. We saw… Nacedo told us that Max was king. That Tess was his wife. No… I’m over reacting. She can’t be one of us. She just can’t be.

“Who was she?” That was the real question. Who the hell is Liz Parker and what makes her think that she was reincarnated?

“I don’t know. She was just about to tell me when the two of you came back from the restroom. What did Max tell you?” She looked at me. Her eyes filled with tears that had yet to spill. I was such a jerk. I felt my anger and frustration drain out of me. I shouldn’t have treated her like this. If it weren’t for her my life would be incomplete. Max was right. Maria was the one for me. No questions asked. Who was I to say that Max didn’t deserve his own Maria.

I took a deep breath and began to go over what had happened between Max and I. “She’s like us but not the same as us.” She nodded her head in understanding. After all this time we knew what we were up against when Max didn’t come right out and tell us. He was going to try and handle this his way. When would he learn that his way wasn’t always the right way?

“What are we going to do now? Is she good or is she evil? Are we going to tell Alex and Isabel as well as Kyle and Tess?” That’s what I love about Maria. She’s always good about coming up with the questions that need to be answered. The only thing is I don’t know the answers.

“We don’t do anything. We don’t do anything until Max tells us what to do. I gave him until tomorrow to find out what’s going on with Liz. As far as telling Alex, Isabel, Kyle and Tess we don’t tell them a thing. As far as they know we never saw them this weekend.” I hated saying that. If it was one thing that I hated to do, it was sitting around and doing nothing. I hated just to sit here with my hands tied.

“How am I supposed to do that? I can’t lie to them. Alex and Kyle will know that I know something.” It was true. That’s how they found out about us in the first place. Maria just doesn’t know how to lie. That’s why I’ve forbidden her from playing any kind of poker at all.

I turned and looked at her. “You will tell them nothing.” I grounded out. Relenting a bit I continued, “Look, just try to avoid them. That way they won’t catch you lying to them.” I’m pretty sure she got the idea.

I pulled into our assigned parking spot and got out of the car. I looked down at my watch. There wasn’t much time before I needed to go back to the restaurant. They will be leaving and I wanted to follow them. It didn’t matter that Max thought he had things under control, but one look at his face when he was with Liz and I knew he was the farthest thing form being under control that I had ever seen him. I was his second in command. I was responsible for protecting him. Even if it was from a potential girlfriend.

“Did Max say whether or not we’re still on for our usual Sunday morning ritual?” She was following me up the stairs to our apartment. Did she even hear what she was saying?

“What do you think?” That was like the last thing on our minds as we argued in the small hallway at the restaurant. I unlocked the door and threw the keys onto the little table that sat beside the door. She flopped down on the couch and just stared at the clock that was on top of our TV. She was depressed. I felt for her. Really I did but she would be okay. She was safe away from the intruder. It was Max that was in trouble. Whether he chose to believe it or not. He was. I just know it.

“I don’t feel so well.” I take in her appearance and notice that she has turned pale. She got up and headed for the bedroom. I walked a little deeper into the apartment and watched her crawl into the bed and pull the covers up over her. I so wanted to join her and hold her and make everything all better but being held wasn’t going to do the trick this time. This was serious. Really serious.

I walked into the bedroom and sat down at the foot of the bed. “Look… its going to be okay. Really.”

“I’m not so sure about that. It would have been different if I would have listened to my head but I chose to ignore it. I want Max to be happy and I felt, feel, that Liz can do that.” She rolled over and pulled the covers down so she could look at me. “I know what you’re thinking and I don’t believe that she’s evil. She’s not evil, Michael. I don’t know how to explain it but I feel really close to her. Closer than I do to either Isabel or Tess. Go easy on him, Michael. It’s not easy being him and to find someone that he can relate to…”

“I know. Believe me I know. Don’t you think I see what she does to him? I just hope it’s for the right reasons. I gotta go.”

“Michael!” She called to me as I reached the doorway that led into the living room. “Let Max do it. Stay out of it until tomorrow. Please.”

I smiled at her. I didn’t want to tell her that I would for I would be lying to her and I tried really hard not to lie to her.

“I’ll be back later.” I walked out the door and got on my bike. It would be easier to hide in the shadows on that then in the red Jetta.

I pulled up in front of the restaurant and was too late. The Jeep was gone. “Great!” I pulled around and headed for the dorms. I drove around campus looking for the old army surplus Jeep and was really pissed that I didn’t see it anywhere.

I went by his apartment and wound up with another dead end. He wasn’t there either. I was forced back to our apartment. Why couldn’t anything ever go my way?

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I spent most of the afternoon pacing the living room while Maria slept her depression off. The sky turned dark and it began to mist. The air had turned cold and I could feel it in my bones. I looked at the clock. It was almost time for me to start getting ready for work.

“Maria… are you going to get up?” She didn’t answer. I walked in and sat down where I had earlier today. “Hey?” I began to rub her back. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah… I just don’t feel like getting out of bed. Everything is so much better under the covers then out there in the real world.”

“I know. I’m going to go. I want to stop by and see if he found out anything before I head into work. Are you going to be okay here tonight by yourself?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I really don’t feel up to having company. I just keep on playing the past three weeks over and over in my head. All the signs, they were there. I should have known. I should have seen it.”

“Quit beating yourself up over this. It’s going to be okay. We’ll get through it just like we get through everything else. We just all need to be together.” Together… how could I have been so stupid? We were two short. Kyle and Tess are off somewhere doing something that I prefer not to know. If his plans went like they were supposed to Kyle and Tess would be married by now and honeymooning somewhere in Vegas.

“I hope so. Take it easy on Max. I’ve never seen him so smitten before. They spent the night together. Do you know how significant that is?” She started to perk up. She always had a soft spot for Max’s lack of relationships. “Even if she is the enemy he loves her.”

“How can you be so sure?” They only knew each other for less than twenty-four hours. Was it even possible to fall in love with someone in that amount of time?

“I can see it in his eyes. They sparkled this morning. So did hers. She loves him too. Just don’t jump to conclusions. Let him work it out with her before you go barging in there declaring war against her. If you do that you’ll end up losing Max too.”

“Maria…”

“No, Michael. Listen to me. Don’t push him on this… not yet. You can’t make his mind up for him.” She sat up and took both of my hands in hers. “There’s something more… she doesn’t remember who she is or how she came to be here. If she is for the other side she doesn’t know it. If you come between them it might be just enough to push her over and when she goes, Max will go.”

“I was going to say I know but since you so rudely interrupted me I didn’t get the chance to. Look…” I stood up. “I’ve got to go.” I leaned over and kissed her. “Get something to eat. You’ve slept all day. My leftovers are in the refrigerator.”

“Call me if you find out anything.” She knew that there was no point in arguing with me. I was going to go to Max’s no matter what anyone said.

I shout back that I will as I close and lock the door behind me.

I pull my stocking cap over my head and then place my helmet over the top of that. It had gotten really cold outside and I wished that I would have told Maria that I was taking the Jetta but that would leave her without a way of getting anywhere and I couldn’t do that to her.

I buttoned up my leather coat and pulled on my gloves. Times like this I missed Roswell and the desert. Whoever called California sunny had never experienced their winters. California was anything but sunny. Tonight it was downright dreary.

My heart started to beat faster the minute I turned the corner and saw his Jeep parked in the street. He was home and by the looks of it already in bed. I wonder if she was in there with him. There was only one way of finding out. I took the stairs two at a time and when I raised my hand to knock I saw it tremble. What was I so worried about? I can do this.

I knocked on the door as if I was the police, hard and solid. It sent the message that I wanted something and that I wasn’t going to leave until I got what I wanted. It was taking him too long. I knocked again. The porch light flicked on and I stood back away from the door.

“Jesus, Michael. What are you doing out…” He looked back into the apartment. He was looking at his clock.

“Yeah, Maxwell. I know it’s late but I couldn’t wait any longer. You’ve had plenty of time to find out what you needed to find out. Is she going to be a problem or what?”

The minute I finished asking my question I saw a shadow move behind him. It was her, she had followed him to the door. She stared at me. “It’s not that easy, Michael. She’s confused. I need more time.” I wasn’t even looking at him when he spoke. He must have realized it for he turned around to see what I was staring at. Liz took off into the other room.

“You're just using me!” She screamed as she turned towards the hallway and ran.

“Andra! Wait!” Andra? Who the hell was Andra? I stepped inside and shut the door behind me. I heard a door slam shut. “Andra, please. It’s not what you think it is.”

“What’s that Zan? You’re just keeping me here in hopes of finding out information. You never cared about me.” Zan? This is wrong.

I followed their voices and realized that Liz had locked herself in the bathroom. “Maxwell, what the hell is going on?”

“Not now, Michael!”

I grabbed him by the shoulder and spun him around. “Yes, now! I want to know why the hell she is calling you Zan and who the hell is Andra.” He turned back around to face the door.

“Andra.” She didn’t call out.

I pushed him aside. “Let me take care of this.” I held out my hand and blasted the door open. Max pushed me aside and was the first one inside.

“She’s not here.” The room was empty I didn’t need Max to tell me that she wasn’t there anymore. The bathroom window, if that’s what you wanted to call it, was open. It was just barely big enough for her to fit through.

He pushed me out of the way and ran outside. “Andra!” He screamed. I followed him and when he started to take off without a coat or shoes on, I stopped him.

“Max… you don’t have any shoes on.” I had to point the obvious out to him.

“Neither does she. She’s out there all alone and she has no one… NO ONE!” I grabbed him and pulled him back into the apartment.

“Get your shoes on and we’ll go looking for her.” I waited while he went to his room and came out. He had a couple of towels and a blanket as well as her shoes. “Did you get everything?”

He didn’t answer me. He stormed out of the apartment and threw the stuff in the back seat of the Jeep. He then pulled out the top and the sides and began to put them on. I stood on the other side and stretched the fabric over the frame. We had it all back together in less than a few minutes. He started the Jeep and peeled out of the parking space. The tires spun and it took them awhile before they gripped the wet surface.

“You know it’s not my fault.” I knew he blamed me. Hell, I even blamed myself.

“What the hell do you mean it isn’t your fault Michael? Didn’t you give me until tomorrow to tell you what’s was going on?” Max was really upset. “Why the hell were you pounding at my door in the middle of the night?”

“You disappeared. When I went looking for you I couldn’t find you and got nervous.” I tried to explain myself. “I didn’t know that Liz would get so upset if I showed up at your apartment.”

“I know. It’s just that I wished that you would have given me until tomorrow.”

“Why did you call her Andra? Who is she? She’s one of us isn’t she?” I wasn’t really giving him that much time to answer my questions. He was barely looking at the road as it was. I took his cue and looked out my side of the vehicle.

“She was queen before me. We were married before I was married to Ava. She’s here on earth looking for me. She needs the seal that I carry in order to go back and defeat Khivar.” The information that he told me held no emotion at all.

“Wow…” I didn’t know what else to say. What could I say? The silence filled the interior of the Jeep and we continued our search.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do if I don’t find her. She’ll go back without me and I’ll loose her forever. She told me she was just about to give up. I can’t let her do that. I won’t.”

“Look, I’m sorry I barged in there tonight. If you would have just called and told me what was going on I would have backed off.”

“No you wouldn’t. You left the restaurant this morning telling me that I had until tomorrow. It’s not even eleven o’clock tonight and you are already at my door banging and demanding. Would it have killed you to go to work tonight and then come to me tomorrow like you said you would? If I don’t find her…”

“We’ll find her.” I wasn’t about to let him say, that if we don’t find her, that he would never forgive me. I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have Max around. He and Isabel and Maria are the only family that I have and once Maria finds out what happened I’m sure I will be in the doghouse for quite some time.

Max drove to the dorms and we raced to see if she was in her room. She wasn’t. A guy was walking the hall and I grabbed him. “Hey, have you seen Liz Parker tonight?”

“Nah, man. I haven’t.” He looked down at my hand that was still gripping his arm.

“If you see her call security. Ask for Michael.” I loosened my grip.

“Sure dude. What she do?”

“Nothing. Just call security.” Max was halfway down the hall. He had left the minute he heard the guy say that he hadn’t seen Liz anywhere.

“Max! Wait up!” I jogged after him. He pushed through the double glass doors and was in the jeep by the time I caught up with him.

“Shouldn’t you be at work by now?” He spat.

“Yeah, but I feel I need to be with you and help you look.”

“You can help by going to work. I can’t concentrate on her. I can’t feel her.”

“What? You can feel her?”

“Just go to work, Michael.” He put the Jeep in drive. It was just getting deeper and deeper. I looked down at my watch. I had ten minutes to get to work. I’ll do the rounds tonight. It’s the least I could do. If she were out wandering the campus tonight I would find her. If I didn’t I hoped that Max would be able to find her. It was getting colder as the time ticked by.

I walked into our small security office and punched the clock. “There’s a call on line two for you Guerin.”

“Thanks.” I immediately picked up the phone. “Guerin.”

“Hey, some guy said that if I saw Liz Parker to call Michael at the security office.”

“Yeah, yeah, that was me. Did you see her?”

“Yeah, she just walked into her room and left really quickly. She was crying. I tried to stop her but she threw me to the wall and left.”

“Thanks man. I’m on my way.” I slammed the phone down. “I’m off to the Taylor dorms. Someone called in a disturbance.” I didn’t wait for anyone to tell me differently. I can’t believe one of us didn’t stay there. We must have just missed her.

The only thing that kept going through my mind was that if anything happened to her Max was going to kill me. She was my queen even before Max was king. I should have known, after all I always had this feeling of protecting him why didn’t I feel the same way about Liz?

There was too much missing information that I still needed. At least I felt like there was. Maybe there wasn’t. I took the golf cart and raced, well raced as fast as the dang thing would go which wasn’t very fast, to the dorms. I parked it right outside the double glass doors and ran inside. I went to her room and found the door wide open.

“Liz…” I took a step closer. One foot was in the room while the majority of me was still outside the door. “It’s Michael. Look, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have barged in there like that. I just want to make sure that you’re okay.” I had yet to hear anything from her. “Max is really worried about you…” I hear feet hitting the tile floor behind me. They were running. I whirled around and caught dark hair trailing behind a feminine body. Definitely Liz. I figured she would have left before I got here. The guy said that she left her room crying. Maybe she went to the restroom? Who knows.

“Liz! Wait.” She rounded the corner and I saw a man’s body fly across the floor. Well it didn’t actually fly more like skidded. By the time I rounded the corner there were papers floating throughout the air. “You okay?” I asked the man that was on the floor. He nodded his head and I was quickly headed in the same direction that Liz had gone.

I pushed through the double doors once more. A thought passes through my mind that I might suggest a turn-style door. You know the ones that are in all the ritzy hotel’s on Beverly Hills Drive? Yeah, those are the ones. I see her running across the street and she stops in front of a taxi. “Liz! Wait.” She pauses, looks at me and then flings open the door to the cab and dives in. It speeds away just as I reach it. “Liz! Wait!” I hang my head down and kick at the departing cab. Max is so going to kill me.

I go back to the dorm and pick up the golf cart. When I get back to the office I dial Max’s cell phone number. When he picks up I say, “She just got into a cab heading to what can only be to the airport.” He just clicks the phone off without saying anything and I stand there with the receiver still to my ear.

“Michael?” I turn and see my supervisor, Harry, standing there. “Is everything okay?”

“No…” I hang up the phone.

“Do you need to go home?” Harry asks me.

“No.” I can see it now. Maria wailing on me because of what I did to Max and Liz. She warned me not to go over there but how was I supposed to know that that would happen.

“Okay, just call me if something changes your mind and you need to leave.”

“I will. Thanks.” I plopped down in to the chair behind the work desk. I hope Max is able to get to her before she leaves. If not I’m probably on my way to Connecticut to track her down.

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[Bordersinsanity]

PART 16 ~ Max

She still had her head resting on the back of the seat and her eyes were still closed. She had exhausted herself by trying to show me my past life. I couldn’t get up to speed fast enough. Even though she was only a few feet away it was too far for me. I grabbed her hand and began caressing it. “Are you okay?” I asked. She opened up her eyes just enough to look at me. She must really be tired. .

“I’m fine. Thanks.” Some of her hair cascaded down the side of her face as she turned her head to look at me. The look in her eyes told me that she appreciated the physical contact. I wonder if she in enjoys it as much as I do? I guess we will have plenty of time to find out.

She took a deep breath and her body shuttered as she let it out. She looked so tired and her face was somewhat pale. “Is that normal for you to get weak?” I know when I heal that the more damage there is the more tired I am after my work is done. It must be pretty much the same way with her visions.

“No, I don’t think so. It’s the first time that I had ever tried to do that on Earth. Maybe it’s the human form that slowed the connection down, I just don’t know. My list of things to ask the next time I return to the other side is getting longer by the minute.” I cringed at the thought of her having to go back to the ‘other side’ as she called it. She smiled at me and I take her comment as it was meant to be a mood-lightener. I quickly look back to the road and adjust the Jeep. “I could tell you the rest of what happens if you want me too?” I glance back at her. I had never thought that she could actually just tell me the story. I looked at her and thought that maybe she should rest but something in her eye told me that she really wanted to tell me the rest of the story.

“If you’re up to it, I would really like to know what happened.” I pinned her with my gaze for just a brief moment and then looked back to where I was going. She had been smiling. I couldn’t help but wonder what I would have been doing if I had backed out of the party last night. Last night… I can’t believe that it was just yesterday that I had met the love of my life.

She began to continue the story. “My father was dead. I was accused of his murder because I was unaccounted for during the gala.” I looked her way once again. She wasn’t looking at me. She was peering out the front windshield. I can only imagine what she saw in her mind. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t the black asphalt that we were traveling on.

Her words finally registered and I realized the absurdity of it. “But, that’s crazy. You were with me the entire night.” Their first night together and he caused her to get into trouble. She had told me that what I saw was only the way she saw it. The information that she knew to be true. What if the man that I was in my previous life had set her up? The skins seem to think that I was an evil man in my previous life, maybe I was. It was quite a coincidence that I was able to keep her out all night. I shook my head to clear my self-accusing thoughts and turned my focus back to her story. That’s what it was… Her story. Not mine, even though I was woven so thoroughly into it. I wouldn’t know what really happened and for what reasons until I got my past-life memories back.

“I know that and you know that but at the time they didn’t. You see…” She paused for just a moment and then continued. “When I was born there was a seer present.” She knew that I would have questions so she paused for me and I did what she expected.

“A seer?” I asked my question.

“Yes, he looks upon the soul of the new born child and predicts its destiny.” Oh, he sees.

Sees what… the future? “But that’s ridiculous. The future can’t be told.” She smiled at me and something in her eyes told me I had so much more to learn. I knew I did. After all I was only twenty-two years old. I had a whole lifetime of stuff to learn. Make that, two lifetimes.

“Yes, it can. Let me finish the scene that I had begun I don’t want to jump ahead.” I nodded my head and she took a deep breath before she continued. The sound of her voice tickled my ears. They tingled with every word.

~*~FLASH~*~

They dragged me out of my rooms and hauled me to the dungeon. “Princess Andra Aliya you have been charged with the murder of the king. How do you plead?” Rath’s voice filled the small cell with an echoing boom.

“I didn’t do it, Rath. I swear.”

“You left the gala early, Andra. Where did you go?” He asked. His voice not so domineering.

“I was with Zan. Find Zan. He’ll tell you that I speak the truth.”

“I wish it were that easy, cousin. I’ve looked for him and he’s nowhere to be found.”

“That can’t be. I just…” I realized that I had slammed the door on him and told him to go home. He had done what I had told him and now my life depended on him being found.

“You what?” Rath asked.

“He’s gone.” I said in a whisper. Tears finally broke loose and they rolled down my cheek. Rath opened the cell door and walked in. “I swear on my life, Rath I didn’t kill my father. He was all I had.”

“I know, Andra. I know. I’m just doing my job.” He took me into his embrace and tried to comfort me. “If it were up to me you wouldn’t be down here but your uncle says that the people are demanding your holding. He says that if he showed favoritism now that there would be an uprising and a war would soon break out. He’s doing everything he can to maintain peace. The prophecy has started.”

I was brought back to the present when her voice changed cadence. “I was down there for three weeks before you came back.” Three weeks. She was the king’s daughter. Who in their right mind would keep a princess in a dungeon for three weeks? Why didn’t Rath take her from that dreary place? Someone should have been there for her. I hated to think of what kind of person I was back then. There was so many different scenarios running through my mind that I didn’t really know what to believe. What she must have gone through and how alone she must have been.

“What took me so long?” My absence made me believe that I wasn’t really who I thought I was in my past life. There was no reason for me to stay away except that I was a part of whatever plan to take her down.

“You had no way of knowing.” She assured me but I still had my doubts. “You thought my absence from communication was because I no longer wanted anything to do with you.” She must have seen my confusion. Even if she didn’t want me around she wouldn’t have been able to keep me from being with her in her time of need. Something was off but I let her continue with the story.

~*~FLASH~*~

“Andra!” He ran down the stairs as quickly as he could. He stumbled on the last two and came crashing to the bars that imprisoned me.

“Zan!” I grabbed hold of his face and kissed him with all my might. “You’re alive. I was so worried. No one could find you and Rath’s looked everywhere for you.”

“I’m sorry my love. I should have known. I was so foolish to run away like that.” I laid a gentle finger on his lips to quiet him.

“All that matters is that you’re here now. You’re finally here.”

“Guards. I demand you unlock this door now!” He yelled with authority.

They did as he demanded and I launched myself into his arms. He carried me up the stairs and back to my rooms. I gently laid my head on his shoulder as he carried me. “Andra, you’ve lost so much weight. Have they not been feeding you?” I looked up into his worried gazed and then replaced my head back on his shoulder.

I was so relieved to be out of that hellhole and to find out that he was safe. My worse nightmare was that someone had killed him too. Everyone that held a special place in my heart had been ripped away all in one night. “They fed me, Zan but I didn’t eat much. I couldn’t. I was so worried that something terrible had happened to you.”

“But Rath, where was he? Why didn’t he help you?”

“I haven’t seen him since I was first imprisoned. I think my uncle sent him away.” Seeing the look on Zan’s face she continued, “It was for the best. Everyone thinks I’m guilty and Rath would just get himself in trouble trying to protect me.”

“But you’re innocent Andra. You should be fighting this. You shouldn’t be in the dungeons.”

“Zan, the seer has spoken. The prophecy is taking place. This is my destiny.” She tried to explain to Zan, “Anyway, it wasn’t worth fighting, I’d just lose anyway and after you left I thought I had driven you away for ever, I couldn’t bear the thought of continuing.”

“Shhh, my love, don’t speak of that ever again. I’m here and I will never leave you again. I promise.” He palmed the lock on my door and it swung open.

He took me and laid me gently on the bed. He then kissed me on the forehead and left me. I watched him head toward the bathroom and when he disappeared I heard the water for the tub begin to run. I looked down and realized that I was filthy. The dungeon wasn’t the cleanest and it showed. My dress was torn and dirty from weeks of wearing. He returned shortly and picked me up and took me into the room. I don’t know if it was from not eating or the reality that I was finally safe but when he stood me up on my own I went tumbling down to the floor. I started to cry at my helplessness and he just cradled me.

“Shh… I’m here now.” He began to unbutton my dress and when all that was left was for me to slip out of it he hesitated. My eyes begged for him to continue I didn’t care what the consequences was all I knew was that I wanted what was to come next.

Seeing that he wasn’t going to take the dress off the rest of the way I did it for him. It pooled around my waist and I as soon as the cool air hit my bare skin my breasts reacted, the nipples hardening as he looked. He took a sudden intake of breath and as he looked me up and down. I saw the hunger in his eyes surface. “You are so beautiful.” He said. He captured my lips with his own and in one swift movement he stood the both of us up.

He held my body away from his and the dress fell the rest of the way down to the floor. He wrapped his strong arms around me and drew me in closer to him. I could feel the rise and fall of his chest. My fingers ached to touch him the way that I knew he wanted to be touched. Suddenly the shirt that he was wearing was too much of a barrier between us and I grabbed at it and pulled it open, buttons flew across the room while our tongues dueled. The taste of him was more than what I had dreamt it would be.

I pushed his shirt back over his shoulders. It stopped because his arms were wrapped so tightly around my body. I tugged at it and he finally loosened one arm and then the other. His shirt joined my dress on the floor. We kissed and our hands roamed each other’s bare skin. When he finally pulled away to catch his breath we were both glowing from our close contact.

He cupped my face in his hand as he looked into my eyes with longing. As he went to run his fingers through my hair he became aware of just how dirty and tangled it had become. “You need to clean up and rest. We can wait.” He said as he gently sat me into the large oval tub that was filled to the brim with hot water. I relaxed even more and settled deep within its warm water. Zan knelt down beside the tub and began lathering the cloth with soap. He reached deep down and grabbed hold of my foot. I lifted it with some assistance and he began to wash me. The gentleness that he took in washing me made my insides flutter with anticipation of what was to come next.

He urged me to lay back and I did as he silently requested by a gentle nudge in the right direction. He poured the water over my hair and then gently began to work in the soap to clean it. It was full of knots from the weeks of neglect. I tried to help him but he just shooed my hands away. “I want to do this. I love your hair. Please, it’s the least I can do for you, my princess.”

“Zan, I’m not your princess. My title has been ripped away from me. The people have spoken and I don’t blame them.”

“Nonsense. You have not heard what the people are saying. They believe in you. I believe in you.”

I sat up straighter and looked up at him. “What do you mean the people believe in me?”

“Just what I said. That’s how I knew where you were. Word has spread over the entire planet on how the seer was wrong that Princess Andra Aliya had been framed.” I shook my head. He had to be wrong. If the people were saying that then my uncle had been lying to me for all of this time.

“What has my uncle been up to?” I asked him.

“I don’t know. He’s locked himself in your father’s quarters. No one has seen him except for Ava.” He continued to work at the knots in my hair as I thought. I slid back down into the water and closed my eyes.

I had fallen asleep and when I awoke I had found that Zan was sitting in a chair beside the bed. He too had fallen asleep. I crawled out of bed and noticed that I was fully dressed. I went to him and kissed his forehead. He woke. “What’s wrong?” He asked.

“You’re not close enough to me.” I said as I pulled on his hand and brought him back to my bed. “I need you close to me, please, share my bed with me.” He hesitated for a brief moment and when I tugged on his hand one more time he made the rest of the trip on his own will.

[Bordersinsanity]

I could feel the heat in my ears. My imagination ran wild with the telling of our reunion. I shifted in the seat to adjust the big guy down below. My pants had suddenly felt like they were two sizes too small. My face turned redder when I saw that she was watching me. I’m sure she could tell what I was thinking. I was a young man and had spent plenty of years fantasizing what it would be like to finally be with the one of my dreams. The way she explained it I knew that was what she thought I was to her. Andra believed in Zan so completely that nothing he said or did was wrong in her eyes. She was alone and he was there in the beginning. She held onto him and in her mind’s eye she made him into something that I don’t believe he deserved.

That’s the way I saw it. Maybe I didn’t have all the information to make an accurate judgment on myself but if it were up to me right now I wouldn’t want to find out what he was actually capable of. I enjoyed seeing myself through her eyes. The eyes of a lover. I saw her shift in the seat. “Sorry. I lost myself.”

“That’s okay.” I squeaked out. I pulled at my collar because I couldn’t pull at my pants. I was hoping that would relieve some of the tension but just thinking about the bulge in my pants made it even more of a problem. “You’re a great story teller.” We took the time to settle ourselves down. We didn’t mention anything for quite some time and when I knew that my body was under my control once again I finally spoke. “We’re almost back to town.” She was so beautiful. I’m not for sure what I enjoy the most. I would have to say it would be her hair. The way it flows and acts on it’s own. It’s an extension of her self. It speaks to me just as much if not more than her eyes. “How are you feeling? Still tired?” I noticed that there were some lingering effects of the connection by the look in her eyes.

She paused for a moment as if she were contemplating exactly how she felt. When she knew, she answered, “I’m hungry.” I could understand and I was glad that she wasn’t shy about telling me exactly how she felt. Although I still didn’t know if she was still as exhausted as she was earlier.

“Okay, we’ll grab something to eat and then head back to my place because I don’t think the weather will hold out any longer.” I pulled into a pretty good authentic Mexican food restaurant and ordered a few items, a little of everything. If she wanted something special she could just tell me. It didn’t take long to get the food and we were off once again. The apartment was only a few minutes away and I was grateful because the weather was quickly changing.

Just as we were climbing the stairs it began to drizzle. I shivered a little and quickly unlocked the door of the apartment and threw it open so she could precede me in. She walked in and stood to the side not sure of where to go. I close the door and brush past her as I carry the food into the kitchen.

I set the food down on the countertop and that’s when she asked, “Where’s Ava?” That was the last question I was expecting her to ask me. I never really thought about it. Then I realized that she didn’t come home last night.

I shrugged before replying, “I don’t know. I’m sure she’s called someone to tell us if she’s okay or not. She usually yells at me when I don’t do it.” I continued to get down the necessary utensils and plates for us to eat our lunch/supper. With the time getting away from us like it did, I doubt that we would be eating another meal tonight. I placed everything on the table and arranged all the food so she would be able to grab what she wanted. She was still standing between the entryway and the living room. I wonder why she’s so nervous. “Come and eat.” I smiled at her to try and relieve some of her anxiety. Surely that was what it was. She made her move and sat down. I watched her the entire time. When she was settled I sat down beside her. “So, when you were born you were prophesized to kill the king?” Nothing like a little dinner conversation. We had quit talking about our past life when our bodies decided to basically relive the moment. I felt the heat rise just thinking about it.

I was lucky she started to speak otherwise I would be scooting even further underneath the dining table. “Basically.” She took a bite of her burrito and immediately started digging through all the packets of condiments that the restaurant had thrown into our sack.

“So when your father was murdered they blamed you.” Finding the right packet she tore it open and squeezed its contents over the entire burrito. She shook her head to my statement. I think I was getting a good picture of what had happened to her. “Why didn’t your family keep you out of the prison?” Mainly Rath… I knew she didn’t have any siblings but Rath had visited her in the dungeon when she was first arrested. Surely he could have kept her out of prison.

“They were between a rock and a hard place. If they supported me before I was proven innocent then they would be looked upon as being unfair.” She took another bite and nodded her head as she swallowed. Evidently the sauce did its trick to make the burrito taste right. I was amazed at how quickly she was devouring her meal. I grinned at her hunger. Even stuffing her mouth like she was she was cute. The butterflies took flight in my stomach and I followed her and took a bite out of my taco. I don’t know if it was the company or the food but this taco was one of the best one’s that I have ever had. I quickly ate it and grabbed another.

While I was fixing my next taco I asked another question. “Well isn’t that what your father did when he protected you instead of killing you?”

I saw her current bite get stuck in her throat as she processed my question. She quickly reached for her coke and when the lump passed she answered. “Yes.”

“Khivar killed your father didn’t he?” I’m not sure where that came from. Just a feeling I had deep down inside. If Khivar was our enemy here and now, then it was safe to assume that he was our enemy back then as well.

“Yes, I know that now but it was a long time before either of us figured that out.” She pushed her burrito away and I immediately started to kick myself for being such a jerk. I shouldn’t have asked that while we were eating. She needed her strength she still looked a little pale.

I realized that I couldn’t take the question back it was too late for that. She looked like she was about to cry and I didn’t want her to dwell on the last question so I continued our conversation. “The seer saw your soul as the one to kill the king but he couldn’t tell which lifetime that it would be, did he?” Her shoulders slumped a little once she grasped what I had said. She looked defeated and I couldn’t help but reach over and take her hand and give her my strength to go on. We were together and I would be with her until the end.

“No… yes… I...” she looked up and grabbed both my hands. “I have to tell you something. The message… In the orb… from your mother… It was wrong. It’s not your responsibility to return.” She shook her head ‘no’ to emphasize what she was saying. “It never was. It’s mine and now that I found you I know what I have to do. I have to go back and free my people.” When did she see the message from my mother? Not only that but how was she going to be able to go back and free her people if she wasn’t even aware what her body was doing half the time.

“No, you can’t be right. The orb said that I was the king. That I was supposed to come back and free the people.” My mother would have no reason to lie to us. Unless…

I didn’t want to finish my thought and I was grateful when Liz interrupted when she began to argue with me. “No, you have it all wrong. You weren’t the king. You were a respected leader of the people, their voice in the council. Your father and mine were allies, when your father died, my father looked to you for support.” She paused just long enough to gauge my reaction to everything she was saying. I’m not sure what she saw in my expression but she soon continued. “You weren’t of royal blood Max. That’s why you and your family were left alone when Khivar first came to power. You weren’t a threat to take over the throne.” My suspicion raised some. She was so adamant that I was a no one special, that I didn’t really believe what she was saying. What was she trying to keep from me? Why didn’t she want me to fight with her?

“Then why did Khivar change his mind? Why was my family...”

She interrupted me before I could finish my question. “Because of me. Because I…” killed? Why were the ‘Royal four’ sent here to earth if we were a bunch of nobodies? I quit asking my silent questions and began to listen to what she was saying. How could it be her fault? She died before any of us did. She stopped and I saw her loosen her grip on my hands. I hadn’t even noticed that she was gripping them so tightly. “You were murdered because Khivar found out that the love you and I shared was more than... more than… uh… just friendship.” I had to have been missing something. I didn’t understand any of this. “He didn’t want his daughter tied to a man that wouldn’t love her. To a man that wouldn’t provide an heir.” The light bulb was finally screwed in. I realized now what was going on. At least I thought I did.

“He killed all of us so that his daughter would have a chance to father the next heir to the throne?” What amazed me the most was that Khivar had his own daughter killed in hopes that she would bear the next heir. How could he take such a risk on such a chance? I would never be able to wager one’s life in hopes of it being better the second time around. How would he ensure that she and I would want to be together like that in the first place?

“That was part of it. The people believed in you. They saw you as they did my father. As long as you were just a vocal leader of the opposition Khivar didn’t care about you. But when he found out that the two of us had bonded and that you now had the seal, he grew furious. He would never have the right to the throne with you alive even after you married Ava. Not without your heir. An heir it didn’t look like you were going to produce with Ava.” So the throne was technically mine and I had been married to Tess before but I was also married to Andra. I was in a predicament for sure. It didn’t matter who my wife was before I was still the rightful king of Antar and it was my duty to free the people that believed in me. The very same ones who sent me down here to earth just for that very reason.

“Zan, you love it here on earth. I saw it when we connected. This isn’t your fight. It’s between my uncle and me. Your family just got in the way.” She switched gears. Maybe she saw what I was thinking. I started to shake my head no. This wasn’t just her fight. This was our fight, all of ours, every single one of us that was here on Earth. I was all gung-ho about it being our responsibility that when I looked up and our eyes locked and she pushed that single piece of hair behind her ear I realized that there was one person that didn’t need to be involved and that was Liz, the woman staring at me from behind dark brown eyes. The woman that sat outside on the ground, rocking back and forth while crying that she wanted to remember. She didn’t deserve to be a part of this. “That’s why I have to go back and free my people. I can’t let my uncle win.”

“You can’t do it on your own.” I should have said that she wasn’t going to do it on her own but I jumped the gun.

“I’m not going to ask you guys to go. I can’t. It’s not your destiny to go back but it’s mine. You have a family here.” Family… she was right. Mom, Dad, Maria, Amy, Jim, Kyle… none of them deserved to be left behind. None of them deserved to be put in harms way either, yet Maria and Kyle did it on a daily basis. Who was I to say what was right for everyone? I don’t even know what kind of person I used to be. There was only one way to decide my future and that was to ask everyone else what they thought.

“I think we should ask the others before you decide on what you need to do.” We could sit here and argue about who was right all night long and I don’t think either one of us would be the first one to give in to the other.

“Khivar doesn’t know that I’m down here. He knows that you are. He sent you here so that you would be out of the way. He sent you down here in hopes that you and Ava would grow close to one another and produce a child. You’re safe as long as he still believes that that may still happen.” Tess and I would never have a child together. That much I knew. We were as different as day and night. We just didn’t want to buy into any of that destiny crap. We make our own destiny. That’s what I’ve always said to everyone.

I was getting ready to voice my opinion about telling me who I was going to have children with when she continued. “The High Council was suspicious of my uncle and therefore hid the one thing that would give him ultimate power.”

That could only be one thing. “The Granolith.”

“Yes. The Granolith is very powerful and if Khivar ever got control of it and the ability to use it he would be invincible.” She was talking so quickly that by the time I mulled it all over I realized that Khivar could have the Granolith but without the ability to use it, it would be useless to him. Now we were getting somewhere.

I just needed to ask the right questions. “If it’s so powerful how come the High Council didn’t use it against Khivar.”

“They can’t.” I don’t know if she was going to elaborate or not and it was killing me to wait for her to.

I shifted in my chair and as I settled back in I calmly asked why. “Why can’t they?” There was so much information that I had to pull from her. I couldn’t be upset with her because she didn’t know what I knew and what I didn’t. I didn’t even know what I knew.

“There’s a few reasons why they can’t.” She shifted in her chair and when she was comfortable again she started. “First reason is because they don’t have the seal.”

“Seal? What seal? What does it look like and who does have it?” Was it the same seal that I had to show when the summit was in New York? If it was I was the one that had the power to operate the Granolith. They needed me and me alone.

I pried myself from my internal gloating and noticed that Liz’s face had gotten some of her color back. The pink flush that began to creep up was glowing. I couldn’t wait to see what was causing the sudden change. “The Seal of Power. The seal that is passed down from parent to child and then from child to spouse. The cycle continues on and on. As far as who has the seal that’s simple, you do.” She hurried the end of the sentence in hopes that I wouldn’t have caught that but I did. There was no getting around it she needed me. She took a deep breath and then continued. “That’s why I’m here Max. When I merge with this body my soul is here but I won’t have the seal with me. Without the seal I can’t use the Granolith. Only the one with the Seal of Power can use the Granolith.”

Okay the whole thing just threw me. I had to make sure that I had it right. That I truly understood what she was saying. “Now I’m totally lost. The High Council sent the Granolith down here with us because they were afraid that Khivar would use it.” She nodded. “But you just said that he sent Ava and I down here to create an heir.” Another nod. “If you don’t have the seal and I do…” Oh my… I looked at her and she must have realized what I was thinking because she raised one eyebrow and nodded a few times. Zan had been true to her even after she had died. Maybe Zan was everything that she had believed he was. “Ava and I never consummated our marriage. She didn’t have the seal and Khivar realized that I would never give it to her. Your soul has the seal but this body doesn’t?” She went back to nodding when I asked my questions. “And I’m supposed to have a copy of this seal somewhere?” She nodded again but this time she stood up and leaned over the table. She looked tired. The dark circles were getting darker and darker the longer we talked about the past. It even was beginning to show in her dark eyes.

“How do I pass the seal onto you?” I don’t know what she thought but I could see the flush rising to her face once again. I reviewed my question to see what I had said to evoke such a reaction. I couldn’t find one. She straightened and the flush subsided some. There was still a little hint of it in the apples of her cheeks.

“The Seal of Power can only be passed through the act of love. I can’t talk about this any longer. My head hurts and I need to go lie down.” I wanted to protest profusely but decided against it. In order for her to get the seal, we had to make love… a smile was beginning to spread on my lips but was quickly squashed when I looked into her dark penetrating gaze. “ I’m going to kill the king of Antar and I’m going to change the way that the people are living there. That is my destiny and I am not going to stop until I have fulfilled it.”

She was stubborn and it was pissing me off. “So, I have sex with you and you leave?” I thought that was the gist of it. I wasn’t too happy about the idea. Don’t get me wrong, I would be in heaven to finally make love to the woman of my dreams but it would be hell knowing that she would be leaving and more than likely was going to die. I would lose her again. That was what I wasn’t too happy about. It all boiled down to one thing. “That’s what all this is about? You want to use me to get the seal?”

She hid her head in her hands and began shaking her head no. Okay, so that wasn’t what it was all about. I waited and listened to what she was going to say. Surely there was a logical explanation but the more I found out, the more I realized that logical had nothing to do with things. “You really don’t get it Max. You don’t understand. It’s not sex that allows us to share the seal. It’s love. We have to connect and make love.” So it wasn’t that we were going to have a one-night stand, it was that one of us, if not both of us, was going to end up with a broken heart. Ouch. She looked at me and then quickly continued, “This is useless. You don’t remember a thing. You still don’t realize what we meant to each other in the past.” She was frustrated and I realize that but my heart dropped to the pit of my rumbling stomach when I saw her walk to the front door and open it as if she were leaving.

I wasn’t about to let her go. I didn’t want her to go. She was right I didn’t remember my past life but there was a part of me that recognized her. I stood up and went to her. The closer I got the better I felt. Like the vision I had seen earlier when she needed Zan close to her to make everything all right. That’s what I needed right now. I needed her to let me know that I wasn’t crazy. That she wasn’t a figment of my imagination. “Don’t go.” I whispered next to her ear. My voice had dropped to a low tone that sent the tiny hairs on her neck to stand on end. “Stay here. There’s so much that we need to talk about. So much that I have to understand.” I place a hesitant hand on her shoulder and it stiffened. Did she realize what I was asking? The sensation traveling up the length of my arm from my hand told me she did. There was no denying there was something not of this earth between us. I just hoped that I would have time to find out what it was.

“I’m not going to change my mind.” She warned me as she pushed the door shut. She still had her back to me and she was waiting for me to argue with her. I knew she wouldn’t change her mind. She would still be going back to avenge our deaths and free the people so wrongly enslaved. I knew that. I was hoping to change her mind about going alone.

She was right. I have family here and I have a life here, but without her, I would never be complete. “You don’t have to. I’m not asking you to change your mind. Stay and rest with me. I don’t want you to leave just yet.” I slid my arms around her and pulled her close. I leaned down and whispered in her ear, “I feel something Andra. It’s like I should know something that’s just out of reach. That if I just concentrate enough it will come to me. Stay and help me remember.” She leaned back into me. I felt her inhale and exhale deeply as if making a decision. As she released her breath I felt her tension leave as well. She was giving me what I had asked for. I was grateful for it but I regretted what it would be like in the morning when I woke up and realize that she was gone.

The only way to ensure that she was here when I woke up in the morning was not to give her the seal. Not to make love to her. I could do that. I’ve gone my entire life without having to do it. What would one more night be? It’s a drop in the bucket really. I just had to keep that in mind. She turned in my arms and looked at me. I wanted her with me. I didn’t want her to go. When she didn’t move I took her hand and led her to the bedroom.

She sat down on the bed and looked at me. I could see a darkening to her eyes. I felt the sexual energy rising from her body and running through mine. It took everything I could do not to rip her clothes off of her. I knelt down before her and began to untie her shoes. Such small feet… what did I expect? She was a small woman.

Once her shoes were off I stood up and pulled back on the covers. She stood and crawled in. Fully clothed. If Michael caught wind of this he would laugh to no end. I didn’t care. With her fully clothed it made it less of a temptation to do what I knew would be the death of me. She curled up into the covers and closed her eyes. I quickly took my shoes off. The sweater that I was wearing would be too hot for me, so I took it off and crawled in as well.

I scooted close to her so I could wrap her small frame next to me. The scent of her hair tickled my nose and I couldn’t get enough of her so I hugged her tighter. She sighed and I smiled at the memory of the way it was before. The vision so clear… Zan leaning down and kissing her on her cheek. “Sweet dreams, Andra.”

“You too, Max.” Hearing my name whispered from her lips brought me back. Max… I was Max, not Zan. Wasn’t I? The debate of who I really was began to struggle within my mind. I had been debating the same thing about Liz… Was she Liz or was she Andra? With her it was a little bit different. It was like there were two people sharing one body but with me there was no other half. Or was there?

[Bordersinsanity]

*~*Continuation #3*~*


Her breathing evened out and I realized that she had fallen asleep. I leaned up and over so I could watch her. She looked so peaceful. I reached out to brush a piece of hair out of her face and that’s when it happened.

~*~FLASH~*~

She was lying so peaceful he couldn’t resist reaching out and caressing her hair. It looked so ragged when he had taken her from the dungeon. He didn’t think it was possible for it to ever look the same. After her bath, he had insisted on combing through all the knots and tangles that were there, it now shone as it did when he first met her that very first day. She rolled over and he jerked his hand away.

“I’m sorry, my love. I did not mean to wake you.” She caressed his cheek and smiled.

“That’s all right. There will be another time for me to sleep. I don’t think I want to right now anyway.” She rolled over onto her back and then over to her other side to face him. She looped her arm around his waist and snuggled closer to him. “I don’t think I have properly thanked you for saving my life.”

Zan’s smile broadened and his face flushed from what his mind had conjured up as being a proper thank you. “Knowing that you are safe is all I need.” He said modestly.

“How very noble of you to imply so.” She whispered next to his ear and then blew hot breath along the edge of his jaw and down his neck. Her small hands skirted up and under his shirt and if it weren’t for him being so distracted by her hot breath and her warm subtle lips being so close to his, he would not have allowed her access to his chest. It was hard enough to be the gentleman that he was, without her enticing him even more.

“Andra, this isn’t the…” She pressed her lips to his to keep him from saying no. His hands instantly went to her face. His fingers feeling the silky tresses rub against them. She ran her tongue across his lips asking for admittance. His lips parted as requested and their kiss deepened.

When the kiss was done she pulled away. Her hands had yet to leave his chest. “You were all I could think about while I was there. You were what kept me sane. I came so close to losing you, I’m not going to take the chance of not getting to have my way with you.” She smiled and then leaned in for another kiss.

The second one wasn’t as slow as the first. The reminder of the peril that she had been through in the last three weeks made the need to have him even more. She pushed him onto his back and straddled his waist. He reached up and caressed her face. It looked sad, but her eyes were dark and they were filled with wild passion. He didn’t question her look; he pulled her down to him and kissed her once more. He needed her just as much as she needed him. There was no denying that.

To hell with his family, she wasn’t capable of killing. She was innocent. It didn’t matter what was rumored. He had lived three long weeks in agony without her and he wasn’t going to do it again. His hands moved away from her face and traveled down her arms and to her waist. “I’m yours to do with as you please.” He whispered against swollen lips.

“Good, I’m glad you think so.” She pulled his shirt up and over his head and he reluctantly took his hands away from her waist to allow the material to be taken the rest of the way off.

He followed her lead. He reached for her sleep gown and pulled it up and over her head. She raised her hands without waiting to be asked. When the gown was gone she smiled and sat tall on top of him. He sat up and stared into her eyes. “You are so beautiful, my angel from heaven. Take me home.” She took hold of his head and pulled him forward. She arched back and gave him access to her breasts.

All thought left him and instinct took over. He took one nipple into his mouth and rolled his tongue around it. The scent of her filled his breath and the taste of her took him to levels he didn’t think he’d ever experience. His other hand took her other breast and as he teased and pulled it, it hardened.

“I think you’re over dressed.” She whispered in his ear. She slid down a bit and began to work on the front of his pants. When they were finally undone he lifted his hips to help her remove them.

As he sprang free of his pants he saw the nervous look in her eyes and had to ask, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

She looked up to his eyes and nodded, “I’ve been dreaming of this for a long time.”

Zan leaned up and tenderly drew her to him and just before he kissed her he whispered, “Then we’ve been sharing the same dreams, Andra.”

The feel of her hands running through his hair and the moans of pleasure mixed together to fill every empty part of his being. He needed more and she knew it. She opened a connection between them and showed him her soul. His mind was blinded by the golden glow of it. He knew she was feeling the same way for the connection told him so. She wanted to share everything she was with him.

The act was more than he could accept without offering something of himself. He opened up his mind and asked her to join with him. He could feel her smile and with it came his own. Everything else seemed to fade away the minute that they became one. Nothing else mattered. She gave herself to him freely as did he.

They explored each other’s bodies as well as their souls. The seer was wrong there was no way that her soul was tainted. He had seen it for himself. She was as pure as they came.

Two souls became one as their bodies melded together. What one knew the other did and they each knew what the other wanted. Reason was tossed out the window the minute he entered her. There was no denying that they were meant to be together. Her body fit so perfectly to him. Every curve was filled by the other. He pushed her over and laid her on her back. He pushed her legs just enough to allow him access to her searing heat.

He paused with his manhood just outside her entrance and looked at her to make sure that this is what she wanted. She didn’t have to say a word for her actions told him that she wanted nothing more than to share her self with him. He moved forward slowly and when he had entered her she moaned with pleasure. He gently began to work in and out of her going deeper with each thrust until he finally reached her barrier. He stopped for a moment realizing that this was going to hurt her. He looked at Andra and she gave a brief nod of understanding. He pushed forward and heard her brief intake of breath as the barrier broke. The two of them stilled for a moment as Andra adjusted to the feeling. She then started to rock her hips to signal that she was ready to continue. With each stroke the feeling of ecstasy elevated.

Their lovemaking seemed to go on and on. Each one took their turn in satisfying the other. Her small hands running up and down his smooth chest made his skin feel as if it were on fire. He reveled in the feel of her against him. He leaned over and took her mouth in his. The kiss was rough and filled with passion. She looped her hands around his neck and pulled him into her even deeper. His thrusts became urgent.

Her tongue called to him and he wanted to satisfy her. “Yes, Zan! Yes!” She screamed as her body began to tremble from the oncoming orgasm. “Yes!”

Her calls were more than he could handle and his body followed hers over. Together they came. She pulled him to her and their sweat soaked bodies molded together. Their mouths were once again connected and the unspoken words of love passed between the two young lovers.

The loud pounding on the door pulled me from their lovemaking. When my eyes focused I realized that during the vision the two of us had reenacted it. Liz was looking up at me. Her eyes wide with shock. She quickly moved out from underneath me and began searching for her discarded clothing. “Liz.” I stood up… naked but didn’t care. She had her back to me and I needed to look into her eyes. I took hold of her arm and tried to turn her to face me. “Liz… what’s wrong?” The pounding on the door interrupted me.

“You better get that.” She said. My frustration with the situation told me to ignore the pounding on the front door.

“Damn it!” I reached for my pants and pulled them on. I hopped up and down to get my feet through the openings at the bottom. “Whoever…” I reached for my shirt and pulled it on. When I was dressed I turned around and saw that she had pulled her sweater on as well as her pants and was sitting on the edge of my bed. She looked dazed… confused even.

I moved to go to her and she looked at me and shook her head. “You need to go see who that is. It sounds important.” She tried to give me a reassuring smile.

I looked at the clock it was ten forty-five. How stupid could I be? It wasn’t fair to her or to me. I should have realized what was happening. Whoever this is, it better be good. “Stay here. We need to talk.” I looked at her and realized that she was hurt. I stopped in front of her and squatted down on the balls of my feet. I placed my hands on her thighs and looked her in the eye. There wasn’t anything that I could say. That I wanted to say. What we just shared was beautiful but it wasn’t us… I reached up and caressed her cheek and then pulled her to me. “Don’t worry, we’ll work it out. Once we get past the past everything will be okay.” I kissed her just as the person outside pounded on the door for the third time.

“Damn it.” I cursed. If I didn’t go now the entire building would be awake. I stood up and walked out of the front room. I looked out the peephole but was unable to see anyone. I flipped on the porch light and Michael backed away. I should have known it was him. “Jesus, Michael. What are you doing out…” I stopped my sentence because I heard movement in the apartment. Liz was moving around.

“Yeah, Maxwell. I know it’s late but I couldn’t wait any longer. You’ve had plenty of time to find out what you needed to find out. Is she going to be a problem or what?” He’s pounding on my door at eleven o’clock at night to see if Liz was going to be a problem or not. My anger rose for a couple of reasons. He interrupted our love making just to see if she was any threat to us. I counted to ten before I answered. The nerve…

“It’s not that easy, Michael. She’s confused. I need more time.” Michael kept on weaving from side to side to look around me and when I saw his gaze latch onto something I realized that we were no longer alone. I turned and saw her. Her face crumpled with hurt and anger. She immediately turned and ran.

“You're just using me!” She screamed over her shoulder as she headed for the bathroom. I didn’t know what to do. I tossed Michael one more disgusted look and went after her.

“Andra! Wait!” It had been so long since I have had to react to all these different problems going on at once. I was out of practice. My anger flared again because I reminded myself that I wouldn’t be in this predicament if it weren’t for Michael. The bathroom door slammed shut. “Andra, please. It’s not what you think it is.” Why did I say that? How was I to know what she was thinking? I rested my head against the door and closed my eyes. I could still smell her. Her taste on my tongue, I smiled and remembered everything I could.

“What’s that Zan?” She was on the other side of the door. So close, yet so far. “You’re just keeping me here in hopes of finding out information. You never cared about me.” I hit the door with my forehead repeatedly.

I was just about to answer her when Michael rounded the corner. “Maxwell, what the hell is going on?”

“Not now, Michael!” I growled. He was not important right now. What was important was Andra… Liz… whoever my angel ended up being, I knew it was the woman that had locked herself in my bathroom. I heard movement from behind the closed door. I don’t know what she was doing back there but I had an idea. It made me feel sick to my stomach.

I felt Michael grab me and spin me around. It took everything I had not to come around swinging at him. “Yes, now!” He grounded out. “I want to know why the hell she is calling you Zan and who the hell is Andra.” I ignored his questions. I could answer them later. He wasn’t what was important anyway. She was.

“Andra.” My voice wavered. I was unsure if she would answer me or not. I reached for the handle. I was about to turn it when Michael pushed me aside. I tumbled against the hallway wall.

“Let me take care of this.” Michael held out his hand and blasted my door. The urgency to get into the small bathroom made me over look the damage that he had done to the door. I pushed him out of my way. He had about twenty more pounds than I did and it didn’t even show. He was moved quite easily.

I knew it before I even scanned the room. “She’s not here.” My bathroom window was small and I didn’t think anything would be able to squeeze through it but evidently she could. She was small enough to do it. My anger rose. I pushed Michael out of the way once more. I began to mumble under my breath that if I didn’t find her Michael wouldn’t live to see another day. “Andra!” I hadn’t quite reached the front door. When I flung it open and was almost out the door when Michael grabbed my arm.

“Max… you don’t have any shoes on.” Every time I turned around he was getting in the way. Of course I knew I didn’t have any shoes on. Didn’t he understand the severity of the situation? We made love… she now has the seal! She was going to return to Antar and I was going to lose her forever. Who cares that it’s thirty-five degrees outside and I have no socks or shoes on? I’ll deal with the cold later.

“Neither does she. She’s out there all alone and she has no one… NO ONE!” I still tried to go after her but he wouldn’t let go.

I saw nothing but red when I heard him speak and it wasn’t until I heard him say, “Get your shoes on and we’ll go looking for her,” that the red subsided. He wasn’t my enemy. He was my friend and no matter how bad his timing was he would be there for me. Fine. He wanted to help me look for her, then fine. He’ll help me. It was his fault anyway. I stomped back to my bedroom and grabbed my shoes. Her shoes… a blanket because she would be cold when we find her. I stopped in the bathroom and yanked a few towels out of the cabinet and when I was sure I had everything I went back out to the living room and to where Michael was still standing waiting for me to return. “Did you get everything?” He had a half-cocked grin on his face.

It took every last ounce of control I had not to belt him one in the jaw. I pushed him out of the way once more and went out the door. My anger fueling my speed down the stairs was enough to keep me from falling. I’m sure. I tossed everything in the back seat of the Jeep and then reached for the top. I knew I should have taken the time to put the top on when Liz and I had returned earlier but I didn’t think I would be getting back into the Jeep this soon.

I threw the top up and over the roll bars and started fastening it to the frame. Michael jumped in and helped. I was thankful for his help because the top was on in a matter of moments. What would have taken me an easy ten to do we did in only a couple.

I didn’t bother to say thanks to him. That would come only after Liz was safe and I knew she was okay. I jumped into the Jeep and started it. I didn’t wait for it to be in gear before I stepped onto the gas. The tires squealed against the slick surface. When I finally got traction the Jeep lurched forward. I cranked on the wheel and turned toward the dorms. I didn’t care that there was a car coming. They would stop.

“You know it’s not my fault.” He had the nerve to speak.

“What the hell do you mean it isn’t your fault Michael? Didn’t you give me until tomorrow to tell you what’s was going on?” If I weren’t in such a hurry to find Liz I would stop the Jeep and strangle him. “Why the hell were you pounding at my door in the middle of the night?”

“You disappeared. When I went looking for you I couldn’t find you and got nervous. I didn’t know that Liz would get so upset if I showed up at your apartment.” He said.

“I know.” My anger lightened a little. “It’s just that I wished that you would have given me until tomorrow.” I continued to scan the sidewalks. She had to be around here somewhere.

“Why did you call her Andra? Who is she? She’s one of us isn’t she?” I might as well get used to those questions because I would be asked them a lot more in the future. The silence filled the cab of the Jeep and when I knew that Liz wasn’t on the street that we were on I started to answer him.

“She was queen before me. We were married before I was married to Ava. She’s here on earth looking for me. She needs the seal that I carry in order to go back and defeat Khivar.” I fed him the information as if I wasn’t a part of it. It wasn’t real. This wasn’t about me. This was about Andra and Zan.

“Wow…” I waited for him to say something more but it never did come. I turned down Taylor. The silence once again fills the Jeep.

I could feel how bad Michael was feeling and I don’t know why I just didn’t let my anger for him sit there between us. He deserved it. I knew that and he knew that but I couldn’t alienate him now. I needed him. She needed him. Everyone needed each other right now. It was going to get sticky. “I don’t know what I’m going to do if I don’t find her.” My future passed before my eyes. Walking aimlessly with no direction for the rest of my life is what I would have. Michael and Maria, Alex and Isabel would all be married and have kids while I had nothing and no one. “She’ll go back without me and I’ll lose her forever. She told me she was just about to give up. I can’t let her do that. I won’t.”

“Look, I’m sorry I barged in there tonight. If you would have just called and told me what was going on I would have backed off.” My mind was laughing. Michael backing off. HA! Was he even listening to what he was saying? I don’t think so.

“No you wouldn’t. You left the restaurant this morning telling me that I had until tomorrow. It’s not even eleven o’clock tonight and you are already at my door banging and demanding. Would it have killed you to go to work tonight and then come to me tomorrow like you said you would? If I don’t find her…”

“We’ll find her.” I don’t know who sounded more scared. Him or me. I didn’t want to find out. I wanted to find her. I needed to find her. I couldn’t help but feel like there was something terrible going to happen if I didn’t find her.

I pulled in haphazardly into the parking lot of the Taylor Street Dorms. I shut the Jeep off and raced to her room. Having a sense of deja vu from this morning’s trip flashing before my eyes. What would I see on the other side of her door? She just had to be here. I couldn’t think where she would be if she wasn’t. I hesitated in front of her door and then realized that it wasn’t helping matters any so I pushed on in. It was empty. My heart sank and it took everything I had for it not to pull my body down with it. “Hey, have you seen Liz Parker tonight?” Michael had grabbed some guy out in the hall. I paused in the doorway waiting for his reply.

“Nah, man. I haven’t.” I took off for the Jeep. If he hadn’t seen Liz and she wasn’t in her room then more than likely she wasn’t here.

I heard Michael yell. “Max! Wait up!” I didn’t see the point in waiting for him. He was a big boy he could catch up with me. I pushed through the glass door and was inside the jeep before Michael even caught up with me.

“Shouldn’t you be at work by now?” I wasn’t going to get anywhere with him slowing me down. My anger rose at not finding Liz in her room.

“Yeah, but I feel I need to be with you and help you look.” It was a great gesture and I appreciate it but… NO! I didn’t need his help. He was only in the way. He was breaking my concentration. The part of her that was inside of me was fading. I needed to concentrate so I took care of my distraction as best as I could.

“You can help by going to work. I can’t concentrate on her. I can’t feel her.”

“What? You can feel her?” I hung my head and resisted the urge to growl in frustration. I was in no mood to stand there and explain things to him.

“Just go to work, Michael.” Each word was its own sentence delivered in staccato. I didn’t wait for him to answer. I put the Jeep in gear and drove off. When I find Liz I would explain everything to everyone. We would explain everything.

[Bordersinsanity]

*~*Continuation #4*~*


I didn’t know where to go. Where would she go if she didn’t go to the dorms? I racked my brain. She had the seal she had everything that she needed to go back… and it hit me. She didn’t have everything. She didn’t have the Granolith.

Did she know where it was? Would she be able to find it? If she could find it how was she able to find it? All of these questions traveled through my mind as I drove. I don’t know when I decided to head for the airport but I did. If she did have a way of finding the Granolith she would want to get there quickly.

Turning onto the freeway and pointing my Jeep to the airport I drove as if my life depended on it. I wasn’t on the highway for that long before my cell phone rang. I looked at it before I even answered. I didn’t realize that I had grabbed it in my haste to find Liz. I flipped it open and said, “Hello.”

“She just got into a cab heading to what can only be to the airport.” I smiled. Everything was going to be okay. I was going to get to her in time. I had a head start to the airport. I would beat her. I’d be able to stop her. Victory was mine. I’d have a second chance to explain everything to her.

My smile faded as I exited the freeway… the airport was huge. There were so many terminals and I didn’t know which one she would be using. Swearing profanity as I hit the steering wheel helped me some but not a whole lot. I needed to calm down. Concentrate on the piece of her that was inside me. The seal that we shared would pull us together. It had to.

I pulled into the parking garage and grabbed the ticket that the machine spat out. I sat in the darkness and closed my eyes and concentrated. Relaxing my entire body and focusing took every bit of my concentration. I searched deep inside and found the inner glow of her beauty. My lips curled up into a small smile. I felt her heat radiate out and out until it filled me completely.

When I was filled it continued on a path that could only be her. I needed to follow it so I got out of the Jeep and headed for the first terminal. If she wasn’t going to be using this one, I would hop on the intra-train that connected each terminal to the next. I would lose her if I stayed with the Jeep.

Walking into the first terminal I looked at all the boards and saw that there were no flights going to New Mexico. I was so sure that was where she was going that I headed to the next terminal. I paced back and forth waiting for the train to arrive. I was wasting time. I started to run down the corridor instead. “I’m going to find her. I’m going to find her.” I kept repeating it over and over. I was determined to find her. Holding tightly to the glow of our connection I made it to the next terminal. I glanced at the boards and saw a flight departing in the morning heading for Albuquerque. That had to be the one that she was going to take.

I stood in the middle of the terminal staring at the doors on the opposite wall. I ran my hand through my hair in attempt to release some pent up energy. It wasn’t helping me any. There was nothing for me to do but wait. I hated waiting so I walked over to the doors and pushed them open. The traffic was light being as most the flights were gone but there was still a chance that one of them would be her. They just had to be.

The anxiety was building inside me. It was because she was getting closer. I could feel her coming towards me. Did she feel it too? Our connection? When this was over I’m going to lock the two of us in a room and we are going to straighten all of this out. We’re going to enjoy the bond that we have between the two of us. A small smile played over my lips when my imagination ran wild of all the possibilities of how we could enjoy it.

I jammed my hands deep down into my front pockets. Just a little bit longer, that was all I had to wait to have everything that I’ve ever wanted in life come true. She had to see it my way. The possibilities were great if we worked together. I had to make her see it my way.

A security guard stopped his car and stepped out. He smiled at me. I nodded back to him. “You waiting on someone?” He asked.

“Yeah…” I wasn’t for sure what to call her. My girlfriend? My wife? The love of my life she definitely was but how does a person go about explaining that to a total stranger? “She’s on her way.”

“Well, if I go around one more time and you’re still here I’m going to have to ask that you move on inside. Security regulations and all.”

“Oh, sure.” I didn’t want to cause a big stink about it. I would just go back inside and then come back out later.

“Alright. Good luck. I hope she says yes.” He smiled even bigger.

“Excuse me?” I must have missed something somewhere in there.

“You’re going to propose to the young woman to keep her from leaving. I’ve seen it a dozen times. I hope for your sake she says yes because you are way gone.” I nodded my head in understanding. Sure, I hoped she said yes too.

“Thanks.” He climbed back into his car and was on his way. When I went back to concentrating on our connection between Liz and I it wasn’t there. Once again my heart sank to the pit of my stomach. Panic rose and hysteria was following closely behind.

She’s farther away now. I was at the wrong terminal. I raced back inside and looked my options over. Why couldn’t anything ever be easy? I was about to leave the terminal when I saw an information desk. They could help me pinpoint each terminal that she might be at. I ran over there and when I reached it I was out of breath. My lungs were tightening in my chest and it was getting harder for me to breathe.

“May I help you?” The young clerk chewing bubble gum and reading a romance novel of some sorts asked.

“I need to see what flights are leaving for New Mexico either tonight or first thing in the morning. I’m looking for someone and forgot which terminal I was supposed to meet her at.” The clerks faced dropped when I mentioned that I was meeting a member of the opposite sex. Evidently she had hopes of getting to know me better.

“Okay, lets see.” She clicked her fingers on a few keys and evidently the computer started doing what she was expecting it to do because she looked up at me and smiled. “You’re meeting your girlfriend aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” I had no time for small talk. The connection was thinning ever so quickly. “Anything yet?”

“It’s doing the inquiry now. Its only… damn.”

“What?” I didn’t like the sound of that.

“My system just crashed.” She whined.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Just my luck. “If you had to guess what terminal would most of the New Mexico flights be departing out of?”

“Are you joking? Is there a hidden camera somewhere? Flights going to New Mexico take off out of all the terminals except the international…”

I didn’t wait for her to finish her thought. I turned around and headed to the next terminal in hopes of the connection gaining strength. I took the down escalator and ran down the moving stairs in hopes of speeding up my search. Once again fate wasn’t on my side and I had to wait on the train. Should I wait or should I make a run for it. Sure the sign said that there’s a train every three minutes but three minutes felt like an eternity when I thought about losing Liz. I was pacing back and forth what should I do?

I threw caution to the wind and hoped that my gut feeling was correct. If anything instinct would be steered by the connection and I took off running once again.

Taking the up escalator up to the main terminal I turned around in a complete circle in hopes of spotting her. Just as I thought I had the wrong terminal I saw a dark hair woman walking down the concourse toward gate B-14. “Liz! Wait!” The head didn’t turn and I ran toward it. “Liz! Please.” I was face to face with the security line. I emptied my pockets of everything and placed all my contents into the small bowl. I quickly walked through making sure not to touch any of the side of the metal detector. When the thing beeped at me I cursed through gritted teeth. “Damn it!”

“Sir, you’ll have to step back through, make sure that all contents are out of your pockets.” I did as the technician said to do. I stepped back through turned and walked through the device as slow as possible. This time it didn’t beep. “Thank you, sir.”

I grabbed my stuff and took off after Liz. I had to catch her. I rounded the corner and found myself in a deserted concourse. There wasn’t a person in sight. I closed my eyes and searched for that spot where I had found Liz inside of me. It was there and it was as bright as it was earlier. She had to be around here somewhere. I did a complete circle and scanned the entire room. The only place she could be was the restroom so I went to where it was and stood there.

I realized that she might not be the only person in there so I stepped aside and leaned my back up against the wall. I slowly slid down to the floor and continued my waiting from down here. I was tired. It had been one emotional roller coaster. I pulled up my legs and crossed my arms over the top of them. She was close I could feel her and I began to calm down. The severity of the situation was becoming less and less severe. I had nothing to worry about. I would be able to talk to her before she left.

The door swung open and I popped up from the floor. “Liz…” it wasn’t her. “Sorry, I thought you were someone else.”

“That’s quite alright. You might want to go in there and check on her. She’s crying in the last stall.” I hesitated and she smiled. “I won’t let anyone in there until the two of you come out.” She rested her hand on my forearm and urged me in. “She needs you even if she doesn’t believe she does.” I don’t know how the woman could be so insightful but I didn’t question her. I walked into the restroom and my heart broke into a thousand tiny little pieces.

“Liz…” I heard her suck in her sobs followed by sucking up her sniffles.

“Go away, Max.” She called out.

“I can’t just go away. Come back with me.” My voice was a soothing as I could get it to be without falling apart. Her pain was evident.

“You can’t stop me from going back. I have to go back.”

“But you don’t even know where to begin.” I told her. I had to take a chance that she didn’t know the location of the Granolith.

“I have a general idea.” She said. “I have everything that I need. All I need now is time. You could help by telling me where the Granolith is and I’ll be out of your way. You guys won’t have to worry about anyone coming after you ever again. You’ll be safe here on Earth. I’ll make sure of that.”

I was standing directly in front of the door to the stall that she was in. I leaned my forehead onto the cool, smooth stainless steel surface. “That’s not what we want. That’s not what I want.” I could open the door if I wanted to. It was a simple lock, a little nudge and it would open.

“Well, I guess I don’t see it that way.” I wanted to growl in frustration. This wasn’t working. I laid my hand over the lock and nudged it.

“You’re wrong about what happened tonight. You’re wrong about me.”

Liz sat there with her head in her hands refusing to look at me. “Admit it Max. You don’t trust me. You just need information to see if I’m a threat.”

“Andra, it’s not that way at all. I trust you. There’s no way that I could have these feelings for you and not trust you.” My mind was racing trying to find a way to prove to her how much she meant to me. It finally hit me, something she had said. “Andra? Andra? You have to listen to me. You have the seal? You said you have it right?”

I could hear Andra sniff a bit as she tried to think where I was going with these questions. “Yeah, I do.”

“Andra, how did you get the seal? How could it be transferred?” I just hope that she came to the conclusion that I wanted her to.

“You know how I got it Max. I told you we had to ma…..” Andra stopped talking as the realization hit her. “We made love.” She continued in wonder.

I pushed the door open and reached in and grabbed her. I pulled her mouth to mine and kissed her with everything I had inside of me. I forced the vision that I had had earlier tonight to her. I wanted her to see what she was doing to me. It was a Zan memory not an Andra one. It was mine and mine alone. There was no way that she could have known what he was thinking while she slept beside him. “I’m not letting you go this time.” I whispered to her. She leaned her head onto my shoulder and her body began to shake from her cries. “I’m not letting you go.” I encircled my arms around her frail body and it was like she melted in my arms.

I leaned over and picked her up. She continued to lay her head on my shoulder and I reveled in it. I pushed open the door to the women’s restroom and the woman from earlier wasn’t anywhere to be seen. The concourse was still empty. I spun around and looked for her. I wanted to thank her but wasn’t able to.

“What are you doing?” She asked as she lifted her head.

“The woman that was in the restroom with you.”

“Max, there was no woman in the restroom. I was in there alone.”

Our eyes locked. “Are you sure.” She shook her head yes.

I shrugged my shoulders and then started back to the Jeep. Liz settled her head back down onto my shoulder. I didn’t care about the strange looks I was getting as I carried Andra through the terminal and out the door. We made our way to my Jeep neither one of us saying another word. I took her to the passenger side and sat her down as gently as I could. “I’m sorry, Max. I should have never let the vision continue. I got lost in it… the memory of it…” I placed a quieting finger on her lips to keep her from apologizing anymore.

“It was a beautiful memory and it wasn’t your fault. I was there too and to say that it was either of our faults is to say it was a mistake. What we shared… no matter what you think I’ll never feel that it was a mistake.” She smiled at me or maybe it was at the words I spoke. I had no idea and I wasn’t going to ask.

“Take me home, Max.” Another flashback to the earlier vision. I shut the passenger-side door and walked around to my side of the Jeep. As I did I shook my head trying to concentrate on the here and now. Not the past.

“Are we staying at your place or mine?” She looked surprised at my question. “I’m not letting you out of my site. I promise you this. From here on out we’re together.”

“Yours. Take me to your home. The dorm is so small and they wouldn’t allow me to have someone stay with me. It’s against policy.” I put the Jeep in reverse and backed out of the parking space.

Getting out onto the freeway wasn’t as hard as it normally is because of the time of night. I started to pull out my cell phone to call Michael to tell him I had found her but decided against it. Let him worry for a while.

The drive home was made in silence. Her hand was held firmly in mine and I couldn’t have been happier. I pulled into my normal parking spot and turned the ignition off. I went to get out but her hand held me inside. “We need to talk Max.”

“I know. Let’s go in where it’s warm and then we’ll talk.” I continued to get out of the Jeep and met her on her side. I held my hand out for her to take. Even though the weather wasn’t even close enough to have the drizzle turn into ice I wasn’t going to take any chances. We made our way up the stairs at a slow and constant pace. It was almost as if we were trying to delay the inevitable. Once inside we would have no choice but to face reality.

In reality she was going to go back. In reality I was going to argue with her to let me go with her. In reality I had no idea if I would be able to go with her or not. The longer it took us to get inside the more and more I didn’t want to talk about things. Call me chicken if you want to.

I unlocked the door and pushed it open. I waited for her to enter and then followed her in. I turned and closed the door and turned on a few lights. She stood in the center of the room with her arms wrapped around herself. “Are you cold?” I asked.

“No, not really.” I closed the distance between us and wrapped her up into my arms.

“Are you sure because I can warm you up if you want me to.” I leaned in and closed my mouth over hers. My stomach flipped and then flopped and that was all the nervousness I had. I pulled her in closer and she wrapped her arms around me all at the same time.

I licked her lips and she moaned and granted my tongue access to her mouth. I deepened the kiss and began walking her back to the bedroom. I couldn’t get enough of her. Now that we were both awake and aware of what we were doing there was no holding back. This was us, whoever we were.

We both wanted what we were leading to. Her hands began to roam up my back. I had to straddle my legs as I walked us to my bedroom so I wouldn’t step on her toes. Her hands pulled at my shirt and pulled its tail out from my waistband. Her warm hands made me shiver. My skin felt like it was on fire every where she touched. It didn’t take very long before they were running up my chest. She tweaked one nipple and I jerked away from her. She smiled and rolled her lower lip into her mouth. Her lips were puffy from our kissing and her eyes had darkened to where I couldn’t even see her pupils anymore.

My eyes roamed up and down her body. I felt my heat rising with every inch that they passed. She launched herself into my arms and captured my lips with hers. The force of her drove us to the bed. She straddled my waist and I grabbed hers. She was smiling and her eyes were twinkling. She looked absolutely beautiful. The moonlight was filtering in from my window and was landing on her hair. Everything about her glowed.

I halfway sat up and grabbed hold of her neck with my hand and pulled her down to me so I could once again kiss her. There was just something about her kiss that was intoxicating to me. I couldn’t get enough and when we weren’t kissing I only wanted more.

“I love the way your lips feel.” I told her as I moved from her mouth to her neck. “Your skin is so soft.” She tilted her head back to give me better access. I stuck my tongue out and ran it up the entire length of her neck. She moaned and reached her hand into my hair to help hold me where I was. Her actions made something inside me turn primal. I couldn’t get enough. I sucked at her skin at the collar of her shirt. I reached up and pulled down on the neck so I could go lower. Finally realizing that I couldn’t get to what I needed, I groped for the bottom of her shirt. When I found it I pulled it up. “Off.”

I had lost all function of making complete sentences. She let loose of my head and raised her hands so I could pull her shirt off. When it did my breath was taken away. She wasn’t wearing a bra beneath her shirt. When I looked up at her she answered my unasked question. “I couldn’t find it in my rush to get dressed earlier. It’s around here somewhere.”

“Oh,” I moaned and I attacked the first one with my mouth. My hand rubbed the other one so that it wouldn’t feel left out. Her hands found my hair once more and after a minute of laving attention to her perky breast she pulled my mouth away from them and up to her mouth. The action knocked me off balance and we rolled back onto the bed. She laughed at the sudden movement and my ears tingled at the sound. I rolled the two of us over and now had her pinned beneath me.

We kissed some more and I don’t know exactly when or how it happened but our clothes were gone we were making love in a matter of moments. It was slow and detailed. There wasn’t a part on either one of us that went unloved. I was grateful that it had turned cold out for the temperature inside my room had risen and the two of us were sweating. I pushed back her hair that had begun to stick to the side of her face so I could kiss her neck. I could tell that this was her favorite place for me to kiss. I licked and nipped as I pumped in and out of her.

I was about to go over the top and didn’t want this moment to end so I slowed down. She wanted no part of that and pushed me over onto my back. She was looking down at me with her dark eyes. She began to move up and down and I had to grab hold of her waist to keep her from going too quickly. I was so close I didn’t think I would be able to last. “Liz… please.” I begged.

“Please, what Max?” She knew exactly what I was talking about.

“Not yet.” I said.

“But I’m ready for you.” She whispered close to my ear as she leaned over me. “I want you inside of me. All. Of. You. Each word was separated with a kiss or a nip to my earlobe. “I’m going to join you. Do you want me to come with you?” I shook my head yes for I knew I wouldn’t be able to form anything close to be recognizable words. “Good.” She said and then she rose up and ran her hands over her nipples. She pulled and teased and moaned and the combination mixed with her pumping up and down on top of me was enough to push me over the edge.

“Liz!” I screamed and together we came.

She collapsed on top of me. I was still inside her. Her walls still tensing and relaxing as her orgasm leveled out. I rolled us over so we were looking at each other on our sides. She caressed my cheek and then kissed me. “I love you.” She kissed me again.

“I love you too.” The words sounded so familiar and the hairs stood on end on the back of my neck. A memory surfaced to the front of my mind. A Zan memory. I tried hard to grab hold of it but it came and went in a blink of an eye. I rolled back onto my back and she nestled up to me so she could lay her head on my chest.

I smoothed her hair with my hand and she kissed my bare chest. We had made love twice tonight and this time it wasn’t a memory from the past. It was the most amazing feeling that I had ever felt in my life. I closed my eyes wanting to relish in the memory but exhaustion had won out and I fell asleep with her in my arms. The thought of completion was the last conscious thought in my mind. I had found home in the arms of a dark haired angel.

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