Genre: M/M, Mi/A... sorta.
Summary: Just a little Michael and Alex/Candy tag to Never In Doubt. You probably don’t have to read NID first, but it’d help.
Disclaimer: The characters of "Roswell" belong to Jason Katims, Melinda Metz, WB, and UPN. They are not mine and no infringement is intended.
A/N: Hey there, remember me? I’m the girl who used to write before university ate up my world. So because I’ve had some serious writer’s block, I thought I’d write something else just to ease myself back into it. Hopefully you like. I’d just like to point out that this is the tenth fic/ficlet I’ve completed here on RF. So yay for me!
Sometimes In Doubt
“Now that’s a familiar sight,” purred a voice lasciviously behind him, causing Michael to frown in displeasure.
Shifting back and standing up, Michael turned to face Alex. “Breaking and entering?”
“Nope,” smiled Alex, gesturing behind him to Maria. “You gave her a key.”
“Hey,” said Maria, crossing the kitchen floor warily, sidestepping all the crap he’d tossed.
Taking her into his arms and kissing her soundly, Michael smiled at her. “Hey. So what are you both doing here?”
Alex shrugged, picking up the strange thing Michael had just tossed and tried to decipher what it was as he answered Michael’s question. “Me and your woman came to check out what the haps were in your sweet digs.”
Michael raised one eyebrow at the strange response he got. “Nothing’s the “haps”. I’m just cleaning out my cupboards.”
“I could give you a good cleaning out,” Alex suggested with a waggle of his eyebrows.
Michael pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. “I don’t even know what that’s meant to imply. An enema?”
“I think it’s meant to imply that he’ll lick out your bunghole,” supplied Maria very seriously as she tossed her coat onto the bench and hopped up on a nearby stool.
Alex chuckled wickedly and looped an arm around Maria’s shoulders, giving her a quick squeeze. “See, this is why I love you.”
“Don’t encourage him,” Michael grunted, before returning to his previous occupation of cleaning out his cupboards. His voice came out muffled as he said, “He’s bad enough as it is.”
Alex grinned wickedly at the sight before him. “Just what I like to see, you on your knees.”
“Touch me and die,” Michael warned over his shoulder wondering why he’d thought it would be a good idea to be in such a vulnerable position with Alex. Last time he’d been in a similar position, Alex had slid an ice cube down his boxers.
Maria, who had by this time plonked herself on the couch, called over her shoulder at him. “Hey Michael, stop what you’re doing and come entertain your guests. It’s rude to ignore us.”
Michael withdrew his head from the cupboard and stood swiftly, scowling as he went. “You know, it’s not like I invited you over here and then ignored you. You guys invited yourselves over, so technically you’re not my guests.”
“Semantics,” shrugged Maria, curling up into his side as he sat down.
Despite his irritation, his arm automatically came around her and pulled her closer.
“Who gave Alex the remote?” asked Michael when the aforementioned chose to stop his channel surfing on what appeared to be a teen romantic comedy.
“Alex gave Alex the remote, and you should be thankful that I didn’t choose this one.” Clicking a few buttons, Alex grinned as the screen changed to Brokeback Mountain which was showing a sexy man on man kiss in a tent.
“Trust you,” said Michael with a grimace, his arm tightening around Maria a little.
“Don’t deny what you are, Michael. Don’t deny what we are,” Alex declared, his voice both dramatic and emotional.
“How about you go play in traffic?” was Michael’s grumpy suggestion as the screen filled with images of Jake and Heath doing it.
“Oh man, that’s rough. He didn’t even use lubricant,” winced Maria, having forgotten that fact from her previous viewing of the movie.
“Not even a simple spitting on the dick,” sighed Alex sadly. “Poor Jake, he’s going to feel that in the morning.”
“I think he’s feeling it right now,” Michael murmured, pleased when the sex scene stopped a few seconds later.
“How about you let me feel it, Michael?”
“You can feel my fist,” Michael threatened, quickly repenting his words when Alex’s face brightened.
“Ooh, you promise? I love a good fisting.”
“There is something dreadfully wrong with you,” Michael told him with a shudder.
Maria swivelled her head to look between the two feuding boys, giving them both looks communicating how disturbed she was by their conversation. “You know, some days I really feel like Alex is the love of your life, Michael.”
“Take that back,” Michael growled. “Take it back right now!”
“Chill out!” she laughed, holding up her hands defensively. “I’m just saying, you guys have chemistry. It’s undeniable.”
“You should see us in the bedroom,” winked Alex. “We’re explosive.”
“I wish you would explode,” Michael grunted surlily as he snatched the remote off of him and changed the channel to a hockey game.
Alex merely grinned at him. “In your butt?”
Michael shook his head, glaring at Alex while Maria cackled loudly at her boyfriend’s discomfort. “I’m telling Isabel you said that.”
Alex stiffened in fear momentarily, but then his expression changed swiftly to derision and glib amusement. “You’re telling on me? Seriously? Wanna poke your tongue out at me and call me a poopoo head while you’re at it?”
Michael sighed in exasperation, ignoring Alex’s taunting. “Would it be so difficult for you to try to not sexually harass me for one day?”
Alex mused upon the question, giving it serious consideration. “You know, I’ve been doing it so long... I can’t remember what life was like without it.”
“Try it, for just ten minutes, I dare you.”
Alex’s eyes narrowed at the mention of a dare. He was never one to turn down a dare, and this time was no exception. “Alright. No sexual innuendo pertaining to you and I for ten minutes. Start your timers.”
“Wait, wait, wait!” cried Maria as she set the time. “Alright... go!” she said as she pressed the button to start the timer on her phone.
Alex sat stiffly, not daring to move as he sat next to Michael on the couch. Already he could feel the dirty comments building up in his head, begging to be released.
They sat in silence for a moment before Maria remarked glumly, “Well, this is fun.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Michael countered with a euphoric grin. “I’m having a wonderful time.”
“How are you enjoying it, Alex?” asked Maria politely, only to have a hand swiftly flung up in front of her face.
“Shh. If I speak I’m liable to say something that I really shouldn’t.”
Maria fell silent again, bored with the dare already and even more bored with the hockey game, which appeared to her to be just another excuse for grown men to beat the shit out of each other.
The sound of the door opening brought Maria a welcome relief from the silence that had overtaken them all.
“Hey guys,” called out Max as he entered Michael’s apartment hand in hand with Liz.
“Oh, don’t knock or anything,” grumbled Michael, annoyed that his place had become a hangout spot for his friends. His comment was largely ignored.
“What’s going on?” asked Liz as she looked at Alex who was still sitting stiffly next to Michael, not even daring to look at him.
Maria filled her in, hugging her in greeting. “Alex got dared to not make sexual remarks about Michael for ten minutes. He hasn’t even hit the one minute mark and I think he’s already in Struggletown.”
Michael’s brow furrowed when he realised that Max didn’t have a key. He turned to Maria. “Did you even lock the door behind you when you came in?”
Maria shrugged, completely unfussed by Michael’s incredulous anger. “No.”
“Poor Alex...” sighed Liz as Maria wandered into the kitchen. “How are you doing?”
“Oh Liz... it hurts...” he groaned, not trusting himself to say more.
Brushing some hair off of his forehead, she smiled encouragingly at him. “You’re so brave. Keep it up, you can do it!”
“Brave!” exclaimed Michael angrily. “I should be the one getting kudos here having to put up with Alex the Anal Assaulter!”
Liz rolled her eyes. “Oh please, Michael. We all know you secretly like it.”
“Like it?!” Michael began angrily, only to be interrupted by his girlfriend.
“Michael!” called Maria from the kitchen, where she was struggling with a particularly stubborn jar of pasta sauce. “Can you open this? It’s too hard for me.”
Alex bit his lip and let out a strangled groan. He desperately wanted to make a comment. Something along the lines of ‘Michael knows how to handle hard things’ or even a simple, ‘That’s what Michael said last night’ would have been a welcome relief. But he couldn’t and it was slowly killing him.
“How are you coping, Alex?” Maria asked as she watched Alex struggling to contain himself.
“Not well,” he croaked, looking in desperation towards the phone she had clutched in her hand. “How much longer?”
Maria cocked her head to the side as she stared at the phone. “About... seven minutes or so.”
Alex collapsed onto his side, curling up onto a ball on the couch. “I can’t make it. I’m going to die. Tell Isabel she can have my laptop and ipod.”
“Can I have your car?” Max asked as he sat himself in an armchair, hauling Liz onto his lap.
“Take whatever you want. These worldly possessions will bring me no comfort when my soul’s in agony,” Alex moaned melodramatically.
“Blue balls?” guessed Kyle as he strolled into Michael’s apartment with Tess. “Isabel not putting out for you, buddy?”
Max gave out a long groan of disgust while Michael grunted, banging his head on the table at Kyle and Tess’s unheralded entrance. “It’s called knocking!”
“No, it’s Michael,” explained Liz, ignoring Michael. “He’s being a heartless bitch. He dared Alex to go for ten minutes without making a sexual innuendo about him.”
“In your end-o,” chuckled Kyle, before turning to Alex with a sympathetic grimace. “It’s alright, little buddy. It’ll be over soon.”
“Only six minutes left,” Maria told him.
“Why is everyone on Alex’s side?” Michael demanded to know, pissed off that his sexuality repeatedly copped a hiding and yet no one seemed to care.
“Because you belong together Michael,” Tess explained. “It’s plain fact.”
“Seeing as both he and I have a girlfriend, I find that a little hard to believe.”
“Just go with it, Michael,” grunted Maria, firing up one of the burners to boil a pot of pasta. “Take a joke for once.”
“Oh yes, I’m the problem in this situation.”
Max grinned at the scowl that seemed permanently etched on his friend’s face. “I’m so proud, Michael. You’ve finally admitted it.”
With a grunt of pain, Alex rolled off the couch. He had so desperately wanted to respond to Michael’s previous question with a ‘I’d rather you were on my back than my side' but he couldn’t. This dare of Michael’s was proving too hard and painful. He felt like he wasn’t going to make it.
“Cool,” said Kyle, stepping over Alex with Tess to sit down. “The couch is free.”
Watching Alex groan on the floor in pain, Michael decided that this was his one chance to pay him back for all the humiliation he’d caused him. It was most definitely payback time.
“Oh man, I’m so sore,” groaned Michael, a wicked grin on his lips. “I went for a ride last night. A long, hard ride. I swear, I’ve never ridden that long in my life. I’m aching in places I didn’t even know could ache.”
Max chuckled wickedly at the agonised whimper that fell from Alex’s mouth. “Is it a deep ache?”
“So, so deep.”
“Just to be clear... we are talking about a motorcycle ride, right?” asked Maria a little disturbed at the heavy sexual references her boyfriend was dropping.
“Nothing like riding a big machine,” Michael sighed. “Straddling it and feeling the power and vibrations between your legs.”
Hearing Alex let out something close to a pained sob was just about the sweetest thing Michael had ever heard.
“You’re cruel, dude,” laughed Kyle. “So unbelievably cruel.”
“Hey, anyone home?”
Poking her head through the doorway of the still unlocked door, Isabel grinned when she saw the entire gang assembled in Michael’s living room. She was greeted with a chorus of ‘Hi’s, a whimper of pain from Alex and a grunt of irritation from Michael.
“What’s wrong with Alex?” asked Isabel, looking in concern at her boyfriend who was curled up in a tight ball on the floor looking very worse for wear.
“What isn’t wrong with him?” muttered Michael under his breath.
“Michael dared him not to make any sexual references about him for ten minutes. But he’s been making heavy with the double entendres and Alex is about to crack.”
“My poor baby,” Isabel crooned, crossing the room to sit beside him and stroke his hair. “It’s ok, I’m here.”
“What?!” demanded Michael. “Why are you on his side?”
“He’s my boyfriend,” Isabel replied slowly, her tone implying that Michael’s question was idiotic. “Duh. Besides, I’ve actually gotten used to it by now. It’s kinda par for course.”
“How long now?” Alex asked, imploring the gods to make the torture end soon.
“Three minutes,” replied Maria, stirring her pot calmly with one eye on the timer.
“I’ve got an itch I just can’t scratch,” Michael declared loudly. “I just wish there was someone here that could take care of it for me.” Michael waited a few moments, watching the struggle plainly written on Alex’s face with glee. “Maria, seeing as no one else here wants the job, can you scratch my itch?”
“Don’t be cruel, Michael,” Maria scolded, wincing as Alex writhed in pain.
“I’m serious, I’ve got an itch that needs some serious scratching. Don’t be afraid to use force. I need a good hard scratching.”
“You’re a bastard, Michael,” Kyle said, unable to keep the amusement out of his voice. “A horrible bastard.”
“I’m sorry, Alex,” soothed Isabel, sending a glare Michael’s way. “Why don’t you make some sexual innuendo towards me?”
“It’s not the same,” he lamented. “Sexual innuendo towards you usually ends in actual sex.”
“Jesus Christ, Alex! Keep that shit to yourself,” grated Max, burying his face in Liz’s neck in an attempt to forget what he’d just heard.
“One more minute,” Maria announced, delighted to see her boyfriend’s superior smirk slip off of his face and be replaced with his trademark scowl.
“You can do it, Alex!” cried Tess. “Stay strong!”
“Come on, man, don’t let me down,” Kyle cajoled as both Liz and Max started to clap and cheer.
Michael scowled at them all and wondered if they would take him seriously if he tried to kick them all out. He quickly decided that they probably wouldn’t, which only served to worsen his already crappy mood.
“Fifteen seconds!” Maria called out, rushing from the kitchen into the living room so that she could watch Alex’s glorious victory.
“TEN! NINE! EIGHT! SEVEN! SIX! FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO!” the gang, minus Michael chanted in unison as they neared the end of the countdown.
“ONE!” yelled Maria, holding the beeping phone up high in the air.
“HA!” Alex yelled in triumph, catapaulting himself up off of the floor and thrusting his hips at Michael. “SUCK ON MY DICK! SUCK IT YOU DIRTY WHORE!”
“Feel better?” Maria asked Alex with glib amusement as Michael pinched the bridge of his nose and the rest of the gang whooped and hollered in celebration.
As they celebrated his defeat, Michael longed for the days when his own apartment had actually afforded him some privacy. He and Maria really needed to have a talk, she really needed to remember to lock that door.
“Yes, you poor, abused boy.” Crossing over to the couch, Maria straddled him, lifting her hips momentarily so that he could roll over onto his back. Tracing her fingers down his chest, she shivered when his hands came to rest on her hips, gently guiding her hips in a gentle rocking motion.
“Did you remember to lock the door?”
Maria gave a long guttural groan and rolled her eyes skyward. “Yes, for the love of God, I remembered to lock the door. You only reminded me about seven million times.”
“Just making sure. I’ve had enough company today to last me a lifetime. You know,” he whispered with a suggestive smirk. “We still haven’t christened the couch...”
Maria pursed her lips thoughtfully and nodded, conceding his point. “No, we haven’t. But Isabel and Alex have.”
“WHAT?!” Michael swiftly rolled off the couch, causing the both of them to crash to the floor.
Maria stared at him in shock, having nearly hit her head when he had practically flung her to the floor. “Ow! Michael that hurt, you wang!”
“Explain,” he demanded.
Rolling her eyes and rubbing her elbow which had connected with Michael’s floor, Maria began explaining. “You remember the night of Freddie’s party when they stayed over? While we were in the bedroom going at it, they were on the couch going at it. I thought it was obvious.”
Michael glared at her. “No. If it had been obvious I’d have come out and kicked them both out.”
“Such a gracious host,” she muttered sarcastically.
“Maria! They fucked on my couch!” he exclaimed.
Shrugging awkwardly from her position on her side, Maria said, “They put sheets on first.”
Michael huffed angrily. “You don’t fuck on couches where people are going to sit, you just don’t do it.”
Leaning on one arm, Maria sat up and stared at him in disbelief. “Didn’t you just ask me to have sex with you on the couch?”
“Yeah, but it’s my couch. Besides, maybe it’d stop them from all coming over so often if they knew we’d had sex on the furniture.”
Maria smirked and shook her head, laying back down next to him. “If Alex and Isabel doing the rumpy pumpy on your couch didn’t stop them, what difference would we make?”
Michael swiftly turned his head to look at her. “Wait, they know about this? Am I the only one who doesn’t know?”
“Max doesn’t know. And I’d prefer it if you didn’t tell him. Liz likes her boyfriend aneurysm free.”
Michael rolled over onto Maria with a grunt, bracing himself with his arms so as not to crush her with his weight. “Max doesn’t care that Isabel and Alex are doing it.”
Tracing her hands up and down his sides lightly, Maria nodded. “Well yeah, but he’s sat on that couch.”
“Please tell me that they didn’t have sex anywhere else,” Michael pleaded, prepared to admit defeat over the couch... so long as they hadn’t violated any other object in his apartment.
“Nope. But let me tell you what Kyle and Tess did in the shower...”
With a long suffering groan, Michael jumped to his feet and headed towards the kitchen.
“Where are you going?” she laughed, getting up herself so that she could watch his amusing reactions.
“To kill myself. This oven’s gas right?” he asked, his one hand resting on the bench as he surveyed the oven.
Maria bit her lip, her mirth almost spilling over in anticipation of his reaction to what she was about to tell him. “Considering your previous reactions, I feel I should in all fairness let you know that touching that bench might not be such a good idea.”
He raised his head and stared at her with wild eyes. “Don’t tell me...”
She gave him a sheepish grin. “Yeah... Max and Liz. Sorry about that.”
“I prepare food on that bench!” Michael all but yelled, staring at his hand in disgust.
“To be fair, they did clean the bench pretty thoroughly after they used it. Liz pretty much sterilized it for you. It’s probably the cleanest that bench has ever been to be honest.”
With a wince Michael looked around his defiled apartment in horror. “Is there any place in my apartment that my so-called friends have not fucked like rabid dogs in?”
“Yep. That would be the bedroom.”
“No one’s done it in my bed?” he asked cautiously, a glimmer of hope in his eyes.
“I told them that I’d gut them like fish if they ever tried to slip between the sheets.”
He narrowed his eyes at her. “And that threat didn’t extend to the rest of the apartment?”
“Cut them some slack Michael. This is the only place that’s free from parental supervision, doesn’t cost anything to use and won’t get you arrested for public indecency. I think we should applaud them for only giving in to temptation once. I only banned them from the bed because the bedroom is our place.” Closing the gap between them, Maria slipped her arms around him, her hands delving into his back pockets. “And I think, to make you feel better, we should definitely take advantage of the bedroom right now.”
Michael considered his options for a minute, trying to decide if he was still mad at her. “Will you do that thing with your tongue?”
Michael paused as if seriously considering it. “Ok, you convinced me.”
Throwing her over his shoulder, Michael strode towards the bedroom, absolutely bound and determined to show her the best time his apartment had ever born witness to.